410 | Clearing the Clutter: Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You for a Healthier Emotional State

Summary

Affirmations for Black Girls Podcast
Episode 410: Clearing the Clutter: Letting Go of What No Longer Serves You for a Healthier Emotional State
Release Date: March 18, 2025
Host: Tyra The Creative

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Introduction: Embracing Decluttering for Emotional Well-Being

In Episode 410 of the Affirmations for Black Girls podcast, host Tyra The Creative delves deep into the concept of decluttering—not just in our physical spaces but extending this practice to our mental and emotional realms. Tyra emphasizes that clutter in any form occupies valuable space in our lives, potentially hindering personal growth and emotional well-being.

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Affirmation of the Week

Tyra introduces the week's affirmation:

"When I let go of what is not for me, I create space to discover what is."
(Tyra, [02:46])

This affirmation serves as the foundational mantra for the episode, encouraging listeners to release what no longer serves them to make room for new opportunities and personal growth.

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Understanding and Decluttering Mental Clutter

Defining Mental Clutter:

Tyra and her co-host discuss mental clutter as unnecessary thoughts, worries, and information overload that can impede our ability to focus and make decisions.

Signs of Mental Clutter:

• Decision Fatigue: Struggling to make even minor decisions, such as choosing what to eat for dinner.

  "Making a decision for, okay, what am I eating for dinner tonight? Is so hard and so taxing on you."
  (Tyra, [10:22])

• Anxiety and Overwhelm: Persistent feelings of stress and unease that don’t align with current life circumstances.

  "If you're feeling overwhelmed or uneasy... it could be because your mental clutter needs to go."
  (Tyra, [10:55])

• Feeling Stuck: Inability to progress or move forward in various aspects of life due to a cluttered mindset.

Strategies to Declutter Mental Space:

• Journaling and Brain Dumping: Tyra advocates for unloading thoughts onto paper to clear the mind.

  "I like to sit down and download all that stuff out of my brain."
  (Tyra, [12:02])

• Setting Boundaries: Limiting exposure to new information, especially before bedtime or first thing in the morning, to reduce information overload.

  "I'm not going to start my day by first thing picking up my phone because I'm downloading new information."
  (Tyra, [12:13])

• Embracing Minimalism: Reducing commitments and obligations to focus on what truly matters.

---

Navigating Emotional Clutter

Defining Emotional Clutter:

Emotional clutter encompasses unresolved feelings, past hurts, grudges, and lingering attachments to relationships that no longer align with our current selves.

Impact of Emotional Clutter:

• Increased Stress: Leads to chronic stress and anxiety, limiting emotional capacity for new experiences.

  "The biggest way that emotional clutter can affect us is stress."
  (Tyra, [14:02])

Tyra’s Personal Story: Tyra shares her experience of moving to California and enduring a prolonged, emotionally taxing relationship that resulted in significant emotional clutter. This period led to isolation from friends and family, heightened anxiety, and overall emotional overwhelm.

"After reflecting on that, I'm like, dang. I was living in such a stressed state..."
(Tyra, [15:05])

Steps to Declutter Emotional Space:

• Forgiveness: Learning to forgive oneself and others to release lingering negative emotions.

  "We have to learn to let go with grace."
  (Tyra, [16:34])

• Embracing Change: Accepting and welcoming change as a natural part of growth, even when it involves letting go of familiar but unhelpful patterns.

  "I was not ready for change... but that was necessary."
  (Tyra, [17:14])

• Act of Self-Love: Recognizing that releasing emotional clutter is a profound act of self-care and self-respect.

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Addressing Physical Clutter

Connection Between Physical and Mental Clutter:

Tyra emphasizes that a cluttered physical environment often mirrors a cluttered mind. Disorganization in living spaces can exacerbate feelings of stress and reduce productivity.

Signs of Physical Clutter:

• Disorganized Spaces: Living in a messy home where items are scattered, making daily tasks overwhelming.

  "I've been living in a super cluttered space...my brain was all jumbled."
  (Tyra, [23:09])

• Emotional Attachment to Items: Keeping possessions that no longer serve a purpose due to sentimental reasons.

  "Why you got that box?"
  (Tyra, [24:58])

Tyra’s Experience with Clutter: Tyra recounts a period of living alone in a cluttered environment, which led to physical disarray and increased anxiety. Hiring a housekeeper and an organizer dramatically improved her living space and mental clarity.

"Whenever she would ask me stuff, I'm like, I don't know how your brain works like that."
(Tyra, [30:44])

Practical Tips for Decluttering Physical Space:

1. Start Small: Focus on one drawer, room, or habit at a time to avoid feeling overwhelmed.

   "Tackle one drawer or one room or one habit at a time."
   (Tyra, [28:44])

2. Implement the 3030 Rule: Wait 30 hours before purchasing items over $30 to curb impulse buys.

   "If I want something and see it in a store, I say, okay, if it's here next time, I'ma get it."
   (Tyra, [29:39])

3. Hire Professional Help: Investing in a housekeeper or organizer can provide the necessary support to maintain a tidy environment.

   "Having a housekeeper has really helped keep me sane."
   (Tyra, [31:07])

4. Create a Routine: Establishing regular cleaning habits to prevent clutter accumulation.

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Listener Stories: Embracing Help to Clear Clutter

In the episode's closing segment, Tyra shares inspiring listener stories about accepting help, demonstrating how letting others assist can lead to positive outcomes.

1. Najayla’s Grocery Experience:

   "I accepted help twice from two men who volunteered to help me with my groceries. It was a feeling of gratitude and femininity."
   (Najayla, [40:19])

2. DIY Project Assistance: A listener recounts being helped at a hardware store, receiving not only physical assistance but also valuable tips, leading to enhanced confidence in completing projects.

   "Accepting help isn't a weakness. It's actually a way to grow."
   (Listener, [41:50])

3. Gym Crush Encouragement: Another listener describes overcoming embarrassment to accept help from a gym crush, realizing that accepting assistance fosters growth and potential new connections.

   "When you accept help, it can open doors in other ways that you didn't expect."
   (Listener, [43:51])

These stories underscore the episode's theme: accepting help can alleviate personal clutter and open pathways to new opportunities and relationships.

---

Conclusion: Integrating Decluttering into Daily Life

Tyra wraps up the episode by reinforcing the importance of decluttering across mental, emotional, and physical dimensions. She encourages listeners to:

• Mental Decluttering: Engage in practices like journaling and setting boundaries to maintain a clear mind.
• Emotional Decluttering: Practice forgiveness, embrace change, and prioritize self-love to release emotional burdens.
• Physical Decluttering: Organize living spaces incrementally, implement practical rules, and seek professional assistance when needed.

Final Affirmations and Encouragement: Tyra urges listeners to identify one item or habit to let go of, emphasize trust in the process, and remain patient as they create space for growth and new blessings.

"Releasing what no longer serves you allows you to welcome in better opportunities, better relationships, and peace of mind."
(Tyra, [38:52])

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Key Takeaways

• Decluttering is Multifaceted: Effective decluttering encompasses mental, emotional, and physical aspects, each interlinked and essential for overall well-being.

• Start Small and Be Consistent: Incremental changes lead to sustainable decluttering, reducing overwhelm and fostering a sense of accomplishment.

• Embrace Help and Change: Accepting assistance and welcoming change are crucial steps in the decluttering journey, promoting personal growth and resilience.

• Patience and Trust: Decluttering is a gradual process that requires patience, trust in oneself, and belief in the positive outcomes that follow.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• "When I let go of what is not for me, I create space to discover what is."
  — Tyra ([02:46])

• "If it drains you more than it fills you, it's time to reevaluate."
  — Tyra ([07:02])

• "I'm checking in with myself and being like, okay, Tyra, is there something that you bit off that you can't chew?"
  — Tyra ([09:21])

• "Organized space promotes relaxation and a sense of peace."
  — Tyra ([25:39])

• "Releasing what no longer serves you allows you to welcome in better opportunities..."
  — Tyra ([38:52])

---

Moving Forward

Listeners are encouraged to reflect on their own lives, identify areas of clutter, and apply the strategies discussed to cultivate a healthier, more balanced emotional state. By embracing the practices of decluttering, individuals can pave the way for personal growth, enhanced relationships, and overall well-being.

---

Tune in next week for another empowering episode of Affirmations for Black Girls, where Tyra continues to guide women on their journey to self-love and personal development.

Transcript

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[Tyra]

We talk a lot about intaking new information and becoming the best version of ourselves through learning about the things around us. But one thing that I really want to talk about a little bit more is mental and emotional clutter. Here's the thing.

[Co-Host]

Everything in life takes up space, whether.

[Tyra]

It is emotionally, mentally or physically. And if it's not adding value to your life, it's it's costing you something. We hold on to so much old.

[Co-Host]

Habits, relationships, thoughts, and even physical things.

[Tyra]

That no longer serve a purpose in our lives. But what if I told you the.

[Co-Host]

Very thing that you're afraid to release.

[Tyra]

Is blocking your next blessing? Powerful. Few things are as powerful. What is going on? Beautiful people, you are listening to the Affirmations for Black Girls podcast where we focus on personal growth and cultivating a.

[Co-Host]

Healthy relationship with ourselves. I'm your host, Ty, the creative actress, content creator and mental health enthusiast.

[Tyra]

And y'all, today's vocabulary word is declutter. Okay, we're not just talking about decluttering our physical space or our in our email inbox or our text thread inbox, but we're also talking about your emotional space, your mental energy, and the relationships we have too.

[Co-Host]

So I wrote down a definition of declutter and here it is. Declutter means to remove unnecessary items from.

[Tyra]

An untidy or overcrowded place.

[Co-Host]

Now, before we dive all the way.

[Tyra]

Into clutter, because if y'all know the weekend I just had, you would just know that it has been so full of clutter.

[Co-Host]

And I also need to declutter once again. So this is a very timely episode. But before we dive in, let's go.

[Tyra]

Ahead and get into our affirmation of the week.

[Co-Host]

This week's affirmation is when I let go of what is not for me.

[Tyra]

I create space to discover what is.

[Affirmation Voice]

Let's go ahead and drop in, y'all. When I let go of what is not for me, I create space to discover what is. When I let go of what is not for me I make space to discover what is. When I let go of what is not for me, I make space to discover what is. When I let go of what is not for me, I create space to discover what is is. What does it feel like to let go? What does it look like for you to create space? Let's say it one last time together. When I let go of what is not for me, I create space to discover what is.

[Co-Host]

Oh, this is such not a heavy affirmation, but it's so chock full of so many goodies.

[Tyra]

First we have to let go. Well, first we have to think about our point out the things that are not for us. Then we have to make the conscious.

[Co-Host]

Decision to let those things go. And then once we let those things.

[Tyra]

Go, we enable ourselves to create more space for us to then go on a discovery to find out what is for us. And I just think that's so dope. Especially in this season of my life. I'm in a season of shedding and learning new things. I feel like we're always shedding layers and learning things. We're all onions. We have tons of layers. Some layers need to be shed. We need to dive deeper into the layers underneath that we may have, may not have tapped into yet.

[Co-Host]

All of those things.

[Tyra]

And especially because it's about to be spring and daylight savings times just ended, it's time to embrace the clearing of clutter. Not just in our physical surroundings, even though that's also very important and we are going to touch on that today, but also within ourselves.

[Co-Host]

Imagine if every unnecessary thing you let go of, whether it is a limiting belief, a toxic relationship, or that old.

[Tyra]

Pile of cloth that's been waiting for you to take it to Goodwill. Hello. If we let go of all of.

[Co-Host]

That stuff and created space for something better suited for where we are in our lives today.

[Tyra]

The real question is, if you stop and think about it right now, what.

[Co-Host]

Could you make room for if you.

[Tyra]

Stopped holding on to what is no longer serving you. Hey, you know, I have been having so much mental clutter lately and I really believe it's because I haven't been.

[Co-Host]

Doing my mental hygiene routine as often as I should.

[Tyra]

But also everyone goes through times where the brain just gets. Gets full, right? And I came across this statement that.

[Co-Host]

Really hit me hard. And it goes, if it drains you.

[Tyra]

More than it fills you, like fills you up. It's time to re evaluate. And sometimes we can just go through.

[Co-Host]

The motions of life.

[Tyra]

And regardless of how things make us feel, if we've Been in that old habit for a long time. We kind of just write it off as okay. This is just something that I'm not too fond of, but I got to get it done. But.

[Co-Host]

But I don't truly believe that everything.

[Tyra]

Needs to feel that way. Obviously there are things in your life that can feel that way, but some of the mental clutter that I personally experience, I know I don't have to experience that I can declutter that space in my brain. So if you have mental clutter, some signs that some things need to go could be if things are causing you unnecessary stress, unnecessary anxiety or frustration. And those things because some things are going to be a little stressful.

[Co-Host]

Granted, we shouldn't be living stressful lives.

[Tyra]

Because it's literally just not good for our health. But some things will from time to time cause us stress. But if you're finding yourself saying, this is so unnecessary, why am I doing this? It could be a sign that that mental clutter needs to go. It can also be a sign if it no longer aligns with who you are or who. Who you want to be.

[Co-Host]

The path that you're on in life.

[Tyra]

We can always reroute, we can always take a detour. We can always choose to backpedal a little bit and then go a different way. That is definitely okay. And if you're only holding on to this thing that is cluttering your brain out of fear, of fear of change or out of guilt, that could be signs that it's time to let it go. Because after that it's unnecessary. What is if you're holding on to something out of fear, ask yourself, okay, I'm holding on to this because I'm scared. But what am I gaining from this?

[Co-Host]

Why am I holding on to this thing? Truly?

[Tyra]

Is it really that bad to be scared? Is it really that bad to be on the other side of that fear of what if on the other side of that thing.

[Co-Host]

Now, some examples of things that could.

[Tyra]

Need to go in the mental clutter space space are unhealthy relationships. Amen.

[Co-Host]

Self doubt and limiting beliefs or over.

[Tyra]

Commitment to things that you truly don't care about. I am a recovering people pleaser, so.

[Co-Host]

Every day I am just making sure.

[Tyra]

That I'm checking in with myself and being like, okay, Tyra, is there something that you bit off that you can't chew? Did you bite off more than you can chew? Is there something that you said yes to that you really didn't want to say yes to it? Now you need to backpedal but you feel guilty, but blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's time to work through those things. Because our mental capacity is only so much. And if we want to be working at our optimum level, I feel like I'm talking about like a. A device or something. If we want to be working optimally, we need to make sure that all.

[Co-Host]

Of the clutter and all of the.

[Tyra]

Files in our brains that we don't need are sent to the trash and our trash bin is emptied. Okay. And there are tons of ways that mental clutter can manifest in real life. If you're like, girl, I don't know, maybe I have mental clutter, But I don't really know what that can look like. It can look like a lot of different things. So when I have a lot of.

[Co-Host]

Mental clutter, the first for sure sign.

[Tyra]

That I know that, okay, Tyra, you got a lot of mental clutter and you need to declutter your mental space is decision fatigue.

[Co-Host]

And that's when you're struggling to make even the smallest decisions.

[Tyra]

Like making a decision for, okay, what am I eating for dinner tonight? Is so hard and so taxing on you.

[Co-Host]

That is decision fatigue.

[Tyra]

And it can be caused by.

[Co-Host]

It's mainly caused by mental clutter.

[Tyra]

You could also feel anxiety. And I know there's a lot of reasons we feel anxiety in our lifetimes, but that can also be the way.

[Co-Host]

Your mental clutter is manifesting itself in your daily life. So if you're feeling overwhelmed or uneasy.

[Tyra]

In a way where you're like, okay, I shouldn't be feeling this way about this.

[Co-Host]

I need to deep dive and figure.

[Tyra]

Out what's going on. Or even if you're feeling stuck or like you've plateaued in a way where you cannot move, you are unable to move forward or make progress in your.

[Co-Host]

Life, it could be because your mental.

[Tyra]

Capacity is just filled with clutter. Now we've talked about what this clutter feels like, what it looks like, what it can do to you. My favorite way to declutter my mental space, and I talk about this with my family all the time. Anytime they bring up something and it seems like they have a lot of.

[Co-Host]

Of things that they're holding in their short form. Short form.

[Tyra]

Look content creator in their short term memory is to journal and brain dump.

[Co-Host]

Downloading all of your thoughts from your.

[Tyra]

Brain to a piece of paper will work wonders for you. The best way that I like to brain dump, and we've talked about brain dumps in the past, the best way that I like to do.

[Co-Host]

It is just a stream of consciousness.

[Tyra]

It don't. I don't care what it looks like. I don't care if I can read it. Whenever I'm having a mentally cluttered day.

[Co-Host]

I like to sit down and download.

[Tyra]

All that stuff out of my brain. That's the easiest way for me. You could also declutter your mental space by setting boundaries. And that can look a lot of different ways. Like, for example, something for me that I recently said, I'm not going to be trying to take in new information at 10:00 at night. Baby, it's time for me to get into bed. Also, I'm not going to start my day by first thing picking up my phone because I'm downloading new information. We're so inundated with information overload 24 7.

[Co-Host]

I need to set those boundaries for.

[Tyra]

Myself so I'm not cluttering my mental space unintentionally. And another way is, well, I'm looking at my notes, y'all. My next one was reducing information overload. I literally just already touched on that. But take a social media detox.

[Co-Host]

Limit those unnecessary obligations.

[Tyra]

Like, as soon as I pick up my phone in the morning, I see my news app, I see Instagram and all of this stuff, and I'm like, no, I cannot do this first thing in the morning. That is information overload. For real? For real. Because we have this constant stream coming at us all day. So put that phone to the side, brain dump, journal, meditate, pray, read your Bible, do all of that stuff before you dive into that phone.

[Co-Host]

And on the other hand, we've talked.

[Tyra]

About the mental clutter.

[Co-Host]

Another piece of that mental clutter is also emotional clutter.

[Tyra]

And emotional clutter, for me, I feel it here. And if you're watching the episode, then I'm pointing to my head. I feel it here in my head. And I also feel it in my heart because, or, you know, this, this part of my body, my heart, my soul. And we need to also declutter our.

[Co-Host]

Emotional state as well. Emotional clutter can look like holding on.

[Tyra]

To past hurts, grudges, or relationships that.

[Co-Host]

No longer align with who we are.

[Tyra]

And it's the biggest way that emotional clutter can affect us is stress. Stress can look a lot of different ways, though, but it's always that tense feeling or that are feeling anxious all the time. And when we have all of this increased stress, we can lack the emotional space for new experiences and we are unable to fully embrace opportunities for growth. I remember when I First. First moved out here to California, y'all. I was. I moved out here with my boyfriend from Jersey. I've told y'all about him. And I was in a constant, emotionally cluttered space. Mental. I had a lot of mental clutter. I had a lot of emotional clutter.

[Co-Host]

Clutter.

[Tyra]

And I didn't quite realize that at the time. And I was constantly frustrated. I was always anxious. I was always trying to make sure that we had food on the table because that man ain't pay for nothing. And I don't really want to. We might get into that in a future episode, because I really have always kept it pretty, like, short with that. But the reality is those experiences that I had contributed to my emotional state.

[Co-Host]

And my mental state.

[Tyra]

And what ended up happening was. And I didn't realize this at the time because I was so frustrated and inundated with all of these emotional things happening. Being frustrated and mad all the time because of things going on in our apartment, because we did live together. I wasn't spending time or talking on the phone with friends and family often. And I didn't even realize that I was doing that. I didn't realize it until after me and that guy had broken up. I was on the phone with one of my high school best friends. I was on the phone with Daria, and she was like, girl, I haven't talked to you like this in forever. And I was like, what? And after reflecting on that, I'm like, dang. I was living in such a stressed state that I didn't realize that I hadn't talked to her in months. Probably like a year. I think we probably went close to a year without speaking. And it wasn't because we were mad at each other. It was because I had too much going on in my personal life that was unnecessary. And it was because of that relationship that caused all of this emotional clutter in my life. And I promised myself that I would never put myself in another situation like that. So. So what I learned, especially really close after letting go of that relationship is.

[Co-Host]

Letting go with grace. Because I was so frustrated with myself.

[Tyra]

For being in that relationship for, what, four or five years. But we have to learn to let go of grace. No matter what is going on in our lives, we have to give ourselves grace. And one way that we can do that with emotional clutter is to practice.

[Co-Host]

Forgiveness for yourself and others. I have to get. Have to forgive myself.

[Tyra]

Tyra, it's okay.

[Co-Host]

You were learning.

[Tyra]

I was 22, 23 years old.

[Co-Host]

I'm still a child.

[Tyra]

At the end of the day, my brain not fully developed, you know, So I had to learn to forgive myself and, you know, others. I had to work on that for a long time with that man, but I had to learn to forgive.

[Co-Host]

I also had to embrace change.

[Tyra]

That was one of the reasons why.

[Co-Host]

I held on to that relationship.

[Tyra]

I was not ready for change, especially in a new city like la. What I did not want to embrace, no change.

[Co-Host]

And also, also recognizing that this release.

[Tyra]

Is an act of self love, I had to love on myself. And it finally came to me. But it was because I was sick and tired of being emotionally overwhelmed all the time. So that release, more so came from that versus me saying, okay, I love myself. Let's get this. Let's get this ball rolling. It was like, enough is enough.

[Co-Host]

I literally cannot take anymore.

[Tyra]

I don't care what's on the other side of this release, but I gotta let it go.

[Co-Host]

That's how it happened for me.

[Tyra]

But that emotional decluttering of that relationship.

[Co-Host]

Changed me for the better.

[Tyra]

And the product of that emotional decluttering was this podcast. I started it right after we broke up, and it's just become this beautiful space, and I'm so grateful for that. And I never would have expected this to come from that, from an emotional decluttering. So my question to you is, what thought patterns or beliefs have been holding you back? Okay, can we talk about how underrated good sleep is for a second? Like, we spend nearly a third of our lives in the bed, but so.

[Co-Host]

Many of us are out here tossing, turning, and waking up feeling just as.

[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Tyra]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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[Tyra]

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[Tyra]

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[Co-Host]

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[Tyra]

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Head to acorns.com affirmations or download the.

[Tyra]

Acorns app to get started. Hey Non client Endorsement compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns Tier 1 compensation provided investing involves risk. Acorns Advisors LLC and SEC registered investment advisor. View important [e-mail] affirmations.

[Co-Host]

Your space reflects.

[Tyra]

Your mind and a cluttered environment often mirrors a cluttered mind. I have been living in for like the last not these. Hold on what I'm trying to say. For about six months, not including this year, I was living in a super cluttered space. And I realized that it was because my mind was all jumbled. Everything was all, you know, all over the place.

[Co-Host]

I didn't have a routine, yada yada yada.

[Tyra]

And it came to fruition. It manifested itself in real life. In my space. I had stuff everywhere. And I think it also happened that way for me because I live alone. So I don't really have not an incentive, but an incentive to keep my house clean. I already I know where everything is and just because it's cluttered doesn't mean I can't navigate through it. But the physical clutter also has to go. I got to the point where I was feeling overwhelmed in my space. I couldn't find anything. If I ended up rushing for something, I couldn't. I was tripping over stuff and it was just way too much. I couldn't find nothing. That was the biggest thing. I was like, yo, I know that I left this Lego set right here, but I cannot find it. What is going on? So those Are some times that it's time to declutter your physical space. And it's also, like I said, spring cleaning or.

[Co-Host]

Yeah, spring.

[Tyra]

Spring is around the corner. So spring cleaning time is coming. And another way that or another sign that it's time to declutter your space is if the emotional attachment to items. If you have an emotional attachment to items that no longer serve a purpose, ain't no reason for you to have.

[Co-Host]

That Brandon Blackwood box that's sitting there.

[Tyra]

And gathering dust that you ain't doing nothing with. Girl, why you got that box?

[Co-Host]

Why is it in the corner?

[Tyra]

I am definitely a culprit of that as well. But we gotta start letting some stuff go and some examples of, like, a space that, like. So there's two different spaces. There is a chaotic space, and then there's an organized space. I will say I am a chaotic creative. So sometimes those spaces work, but in a general sense, it's chaotic versus organized. Organized. Jesus, I cannot talk, y'all. Organized. And in a chaotic space, it's a workspace filled with papers and books and.

[Co-Host]

Miscellaneous items, leading to increased stress and reduced productivity.

[Tyra]

And that is where I've been living. Not from the top of the year, and I'm gonna tell you why in a second, but for, like, six months. And I was like, okay, this gotta change. I wanted to have an organized space, which is a tidy. For example, a tidy living room with minimal decor. Or you could be a maximalist. It don't matter. But in the terms of you don't have stuff everywhere, right? And these types of spaces promote relaxation and a sense of peace in your space, which I love. So physical clutter can look like a cluttered bedroom or how this clutter can affect you. And if you have a cluttered bedroom like me, I'm looking around my bedroom right now, and y'all, I need to be cleaned. It's hard to sleep up in here. It's hard for me to fall asleep.

[Co-Host]

It's hard for me to get a good night's sleep.

[Tyra]

And I noticed when I got a house, a new housekeeper, when she would clean my room, I slept like a baby. Like, granted, I. I was saying, like, oh, my mattress and this and that.

[Co-Host]

Yes, I need a new mattress asap. I'm getting a new mattress soon.

[Tyra]

I'm so excited. But on top of that, when my space was clean, I noticed how much more at peace I really was in my space. Or take an overflowing kitchen, for example. If you have dirty dishes everywhere or stuff all over your counters, it's hard to prepare a meal. I'll be the first one to say, if my kitchen is dirty, I'm not cooking. And if I don't feel like going, give me nothing to eat, I'm gonna starve. I'm gonna eat a snack out of the cabinet if I have one. And that's just not setting myself up for success. To be the best version of myself that I can be and make sure that I'm setting tomorrow Tyra up to be able to go work out, to.

[Co-Host]

Have enough energy to get through the day and make sure that my brain is working optimally.

[Tyra]

Because you need brain food, right? And also, let's take a closet. If you have an overstuffed closet, it can make it difficult to choose outfits.

[Co-Host]

Which will then result in that decision.

[Tyra]

Fatigue that we talked about earlier. I have. I know we've all experienced at least.

[Co-Host]

One of these things once in our lives.

[Tyra]

And physically decluttering can help set our mental up for success.

[Co-Host]

Because it's so crazy just how connected.

[Tyra]

Our physical spaces are to our mental. Our mental state. I watch, like, Instagram videos sometimes, and I see a lot of comments under, like, you know those cleaning videos where people will clean these extremely dirty houses, and a lot of the comments will say, that's a illness. That person is something. Is something is going on mentally. And it's true. Now, I'm not saying to go and diagnose people because they house 30, but.

[Co-Host]

What I am saying is your physical space mirrors how you're feeling mentally. It really does.

[Tyra]

So some ways to start decluttering your physical space, you already know one cleanup. But I'm going to give you some real tips. Tips. Tackle one drawer or one room or.

[Co-Host]

One habit at a time.

[Tyra]

Start small, whatever you can do. Like, if today you said, okay, and this is. This is literally what I did today. So I was going on a walk with my friend Alexis, and I was like, okay, so I'm going to text her, hey, you want to go on a walk? She texts me back, I'll be ready in 10 minutes.

[Co-Host]

Perfect.

[Tyra]

I'm already ready to go, so I'm gonna use that 10 minutes to load the.

[Co-Host]

What did I load? The washing machine.

[Tyra]

I did that.

[Co-Host]

She wasn't ready after 10 minutes, so.

[Tyra]

I said, okay, I'm just start loading the dishwasher. I got halfway through loading the dishwasher before she texted me, and I said, okay. I feel so productive. And whenever we finished our walk, I just came in, finished loading the dishwasher real quick, and set it to Start. And now I have clean dishes, so start small. You can also implement the 3030 rule, which is wait 30 hours to buy something that costs over $30. Now, I don't personally do that exact.

[Co-Host]

Rule, but that is a good starting place. What I do is if I want.

[Tyra]

Something and I see it in a store, I say, okay, if it's here next time, Imma get it. And nine times out of 10, if it's there next time, I either look at it and say, I don't even want that no more.

[Co-Host]

I'm glad I waited.

[Tyra]

Or if I do buy it, I'm so excited. And I actually love whatever that thing is. And the biggest thing that I already said, hire a housekeeper or organizer. And I know that this is an investment, but if you have the means, hire one. Or if you have a friend that likes to tidy up or whatever, ask for help. Reach out. I hired my friend Angelina to organize my space. And y'all, it has been a total game changer. When she started organizing my space, I looked at my closet. She did my closet. She's in my bathroom, my kitchen, my storage unit, my tech closet. Not all at once, but over the course of, like the last year. And whenever she would ask me stuff, I'm like, I don't know how your brain works like that. Like, that just takes so much brain.

[Co-Host]

Power for me to even think about.

[Tyra]

And as far as the housekeeper goes, I live and work in this space. I. You guys know I do a lot of food content for, like, my Instagram and Tick Tock because I'm a pastry chef and I just get tired of cleaning up the kitchen. I didn't already cleaned it up for work. I don't want to clean up my.

[Co-Host]

Whole house again and again and again and again. It's just so much cleaning up the.

[Tyra]

Same space over and over.

[Co-Host]

So having a housekeeper, I'm blessed to.

[Tyra]

Be able to afford one. But having a housekeeper has really helped keep me sane. So like I said, I hired her at the top of January, and it has just been amazing. My brain is clearer. I don't have as much brain fog.

[Co-Host]

As I would normally.

[Tyra]

There's not as much clutter, so I'm.

[Co-Host]

Not feeling as overwhelmed.

[Tyra]

I call her whenever I start to.

[Co-Host]

Feel that overwhelm or I'm tripping over.

[Tyra]

Stuff in my house. I'm like, okay, I know that this.

[Co-Host]

Is about to stress me out, so.

[Tyra]

Let me go ahead and call my.

[Co-Host]

Housekeeper to get this done.

[Tyra]

I really wanted to invest in myself in that way. Like, it's that is what has been super important to me.

[Co-Host]

Now, my questions to you guys are.

[Tyra]

What'S one item in your space that.

[Co-Host]

No longer serves you?

[Tyra]

Look around right now. If you're at home and look at you got at least one item. I'm looking at 1, 2, oh, 3, 4, oh. I'm looking at a few items on my dresser right now that no longer serves me, and I need to get rid of them. Oh, and also this. I have, like, a rack next to me, and I'm looking at this shirt that I've never worn. The tag is still on it, and I've had that shirt for a few years. Like, this is crazy.

[Co-Host]

It needs to go.

[Tyra]

I'm not going to wear that shirt. It's been there a few years. So what's one item in your space that needs to go? And once you identify that item, let.

[Co-Host]

Me know what is stopping you from letting it go. The things you are afraid to let go of may be the very thing.

[Tyra]

That is holding you back from your next blessing. And once I got that idea in my head, I started looking around and saying, okay, girl, what can we let go of? Now, some things are harder to let go of than others. I'm aware of that. But what things can we let go of? And once I started to think about all of that, I started to trust that what is meant for me will come once I create new space for it. Like, for example, for the longest, I haven't felt really confident in my wardrobe. I will say in the last year or so, I've been having way more fun getting dressed and, you know, all of the things. And with that, I didn't want to.

[Co-Host]

Let go of clothes. Like, I just turned 30. My style has to elevate with my age.

[Tyra]

I was going through. Whenever my friend was organizing my closet, she was like, girl, do you want this? This is, like, stuff from places like Forever 21 and Fashion Nova. And granted, those inherently aren't bad places, but they're.

[Co-Host]

The clothing is built for a younger audience.

[Tyra]

Let's just call a spade a spade. And, tyra, you are 30. Baby girl, it's time to dress your age. And also, I have hips now. Them clothes ain't built for hips, okay?

[Co-Host]

And they're also not built to last. It is fast fashion, and I want.

[Tyra]

To invest in more quality pieces in my wardrobes just so I can feel better. Because when you look better, you feel better, and you do better, and I really believe that all of that works in.

[Co-Host]

In alignment.

[Tyra]

You should also intentionally invite an alignment.

[Co-Host]

Into Your life in all of these ways by releasing the old, even if it's uncomfortable, to allow room for the new.

[Tyra]

Now, some stuff, like I said, will take a little bit of time, but the things that you like, dang, that's a little uncomfortable, but I know it needs to go. Go ahead and get rid of it today. Don't. Don't tiptoe around it. Don't put it off. Just go ahead and get rid of it. Because patience is essential for growth. Good things take time, but they need room to flourish. So don't just keep stuff around because you're like, well, I ain't got nothing to replace it with yet, baby. You gotta make the room. Because you never know how that thing is gonna come come to you. And I'm maybe talking about physical.

[Co-Host]

I mean, physical.

[Tyra]

Yeah, I may be talking about physical things. I might even be talking about emotionally. Like, maybe you got to let go of that emotionally draining relationship for the next one to come. You have to let me say this. In order for somebody else to park in your driveway, you gotta move that lemon, that car that don't work out of that driveway so you have space for them to park. I just want to keep you in mind. I'm just. I just want you to keep that in mind. I'ma lead that there and Imma go.

[Co-Host]

Along because we ain't talking about that today.

[Tyra]

And also trust the process and give space for things to unfold naturally. Like, we try to control every part of our lives, and that's why we end up with a lot of clutter. That's why we hold on to so many different things. But trust the process.

[Co-Host]

Things will unfold naturally.

[Tyra]

Things will happen if you do your part and let go of things that are no longer serving you.

[Co-Host]

Letting go helps you reconnect with your authentic self and your true desires.

[Tyra]

It also, if you release things, even good things. Like, I'm not saying that you only release bad things. If you even release good things, you can make space for a greater fulfillment. So when you're looking around your space or you're thinking about your relationships, ask.

[Co-Host]

Yourself, does this align with my current goals and values?

[Tyra]

Are. Or was this something for 2023 Tyra 2022 Tyra 2018 Tyra right. And just have an honest conversation with yourself. Right? So just to go back through the mental decluttering, the emotional decluttering, and the physical decluttering, how to declutter different areas.

[Co-Host]

Of your life, mental cluttering. Do those brain dumps, y'all.

[Tyra]

I swear by them and if you're if you like to write journal Emotional decluttering. Set those boundaries to protect your energy and your mental well being and heal.

[Co-Host]

From those past hurts and learn to.

[Tyra]

Say no without guilt. That takes time, but practice makes perfect, right?

[Co-Host]

And for physical decluttering, clean and organizing.

[Tyra]

Your space or cleaning and organizing your space to reflect your mindset. Mindset shift and also let go of material items that no longer align with who you are. Things that no longer fit in your closet, things that you don't have to lose £20 to get into. Things that you are waiting for a.

[Co-Host]

Special occasion but now you had in your closet for 16 years and you.

[Tyra]

Don'T even think it's your style no more.

[Co-Host]

Let that stuff go.

[Tyra]

Because there's all we always want to.

[Co-Host]

Have room for the new and the.

[Tyra]

Now because we're constantly evolving. Like we said, we have layers and we want to tap into those other layers.

[Co-Host]

So again, I ask you, what is one thing in your life that you're.

[Tyra]

Afraid to let go of?

[Co-Host]

And how can you trust that releasing it will make room for something better for you?

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[Co-Host]

Clearing the clutter isn't.

[Tyra]

Just about throwing away the things that you don't want or getting rid of those relationships. It's about making room for the things that truly serve you, the things in.

[Co-Host]

Life that you truly want. Whether it's mentally, emotionally or physically, releasing what no longer serves you allows you.

[Tyra]

To welcome in better opportunities, better relationships, and also welcome in a peace of mind.

[Co-Host]

This process is not easy, y'all.

[Tyra]

And I'll be the first to say it took me a good two years.

[Co-Host]

To go ahead and release that emotional.

[Tyra]

Clutter that I was accumulating from the relationship I moved out to California with. But the process is necessary and you.

[Co-Host]

Deserve a life that feels good, not.

[Tyra]

One that just looks good on the outside. To everybody else. Oh, y'all, you already know what time it is.

[Co-Host]

It is time for our fun closing segment and today's closing segment.

[Tyra]

I'm so excited. It's kind of. Not even kind of.

[Co-Host]

It is. This is a Letters from listeners.

[Tyra]

And today we're going to go back to our last Pep Talk Wednesday episode where we talked about accepting help. Especially when it comes to accepting help from Men, I got some of y'all. I told y'all to email me if you accepted help, and some of y'all did. So I'm gonna read the stories. I'm so freaking proud of you guys. Okay, so the first one is from Najayla. This is the only one that is that they wanted to have their name. So Najayla, this is her email. Just wanted to say I accepted help this week.

[Co-Host]

It was hard saying yes because I'm.

[Tyra]

So hyper independent, but I did it, Tyra. I went to the grocery. I went grocery shopping and accepted help.

[Co-Host]

Twice from two men.

[Tyra]

Okay, girl.

[Co-Host]

Who volunteered help.

[Tyra]

Who volunteered to help me for my groceries. My maintenance man saw me with all my bags and carried everything up to the third floor. It was truly a feeling of gratitude, femininity, and I love it here. I love it here too. Okay, thanks for this episode.

[Co-Host]

It was truly a reminder for me.

[Tyra]

As I'm working on asking and accepting help. That is amazing. Do you see how even if you just accept help or you make that space. Amen. You make that space for that help to be there. It just comes.

[Co-Host]

It just comes naturally.

[Tyra]

And not one, but two men asked to help her. That is so amazing. Okay, this next one. I'm used to being the one that everyone turns to. I've al. I've always been hyper independent, handling things on my own. But last week I was at the hardware store picking up some supplies for a DIY project that I had planned. I was juggling the list in my head and carrying a few heavy boxes when this guy who worked there asked.

[Co-Host]

If I needed help. Normally, I would decline, thinking I could.

[Tyra]

Manage it on my own, but I was tired, Tyra, and the boxes were heavier than I expected them to be. I decided to accept his offer. And not only did he help me carry the items to my car, but.

[Co-Host]

He also gave me a tip on.

[Tyra]

An easier way to complete my project. I left that store feeling grateful and a little lighter some. Sometimes allowing someone else to step in doesn't take away from your strength. It just makes things. It just makes things easier. Now I can't wait to go to Home Depot again. Girl, I love that. Here's the thing. When I be going into, like, Home Depot and all of these home improvement stores, I don't be wanting men to help me because I be feeling like a damsel in distress. So this has given me a little bit of a push that when I'm.

[Co-Host]

In the home, the.

[Tyra]

The. Like a Home Depot or Lowe's again to make sure I Accept that help. Especially when I'm trying to get, like, lumber and stuff. That's the main time that men be, like, walking up to me and asking me if I need help and whatnot. This has given me the courage to accept the help in a place like that, even though these men be, like, man mansplaining in places like that. But good for you. I'm so excited that you let him help. Okay, and this is the last one. It's also anonymous. Tyra, I'm so glad you posted this episode on Accepting help. So there's this guy at my gym.

[Co-Host]

My gym Crush. Oh.

[Tyra]

Oh, God. And honestly, I've been avoiding the weight section for weeks because it's always just a bunch of men over there. Plus him in all caps, plus him. I've been sticking to the treadmill and other areas where I feel a little more comfortable. But the other day, I decided to step out of my comfort zone and actually try to lift weights. I was doing my best, but I wasn't feeling confident about my form. And out of nowhere, my gym crush walks over and offers to help me on my form. I know you.

[Co-Host]

Oh, this is. This is a love story.

[Tyra]

Okay, let me keep going. I almost wanted to die from embarrassment.

[Co-Host]

But then I remembered the pep talk about accepting help.

[Tyra]

So I swallowed my pride and I.

[Co-Host]

Said, yes, please help me, sir.

[Tyra]

Girl. And let me tell you, it felt so good to have someone guide me, especially someone I've been low key crushing on. I realized that accepting help isn't a weakness. It's actually a way to grow.

[Co-Host]

Plus, who knows?

[Tyra]

Maybe next time I'll strike with. Com.

[Co-Host]

Maybe next time I'll strike up a.

[Tyra]

Conversation after my set. Girl, you better. You need to keep us updated on this. Strike up a conversation with that man. Ask him something. I don't know what you can ask him. Hey, do you like. We gotta be some help. Do you like smoothies? We can go to the Jamba Juice or whatever you got over.

[Co-Host]

You got to keep us updated. Do y'all see how accepting help can.

[Tyra]

Open doors in other ways that you didn't expect? Leave it at that. And if you have not listened to that pep Talk Wednesday episode, you need to go listen.

[Co-Host]

This has just made my day.

[Tyra]

So if you did listen to the pep talk, or if you go back and listen to it and then you accept help, please send me an email, because I'm rooting for y'all, okay? I absolutely freaking love to see it. Oh, that just makes me so happy. Well, that's all I have for you guys today. Thank you guys so much for listening to today's episode. I hope this has given you a.

[Co-Host]

Little push to declutter your mental space.

[Tyra]

Your emotional space, and also your physical.

[Co-Host]

Space in some way.

[Tyra]

Especially with spring right around the corner. I think it's the perfect time to shed those old layers or, you know, get rid of anything that no longer serves us.

[Co-Host]

So with that being said, if you're.

[Tyra]

Watching on our YouTube channel, make sure you hit that big red subscribe button down below if you're not already subscribed and give this video a like and leave us a comment. I love to chit chat with you guys and we can actually do that over here on the YouTube channel. But if you are listening on your favorite podcast listening platform. First of all, thank you so much for listening and make sure you rate the podcast and leave us a review. I love reading all the reviews and I wish I could respond to you guys there, but leave us a review. It really truly helps us out and I'ma see you guys again next week for another episode. This is affirmations for Black girls.

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