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Affirmations for Black Girls
421 | What Getting Stranded in Atlanta Taught Me About Adventure | When the Plan Falls Apart: Finding Peace in the Unexpected
00:47:09
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- [00:01]
Tyra
Let me be real with y' all for a second. I'm still on my mama's phone plan and y' all I am riding it out as long as I can. I think as long as I don't mention it to her, I'll stay on it. But I've been shopping around so that I stay ready. Because stay ready so you ain't got to get ready. And if I ever needed my own wireless service, Mint Mobile is the first place that I look. Because listen, especially right now, since it's summer, it's time for vibing, not stressing over surprise bills. Between cookouts and going to the beach and a spa spontaneous weekend like a weekend trip to Napa. Your phone should be working with you, not costing you extra just to check your group chat. Okay? Mint Mobile gives you unlimited Premium Wireless for just 15amonth. And that includes high speed data, unlimited talking text, and the nation's largest 5G network. You can even keep your phone and your number, which means no awkward new phone. Who dis text messages? So if you've been thinking about making the switch, I' ma say this your sign this year. Skip breaking a sweat and breaking the bank. Get this new customer offer and your three month unlimited wireless plan for just $15 a month at mintmobile.com affirmations. That's mintmobile.com affirmations. Upfront payment of $45 required, equivalent to $15 a month limited time new customer offer for first three months only. Speeds may slow above 35 GB on unlimited plan. Taxes and fees extra. See Mint Mobile for details.
- [01:32]
ZipRecruiter
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- [02:32]
Tyra
Believe that life's best moments came wrapped neatly in a plan that I had carefully crafted. It checked off boxes, my tickets were booked, my schedules were ironclad. I thought the magic was in controlling the narrative, shaping every detail so nothing could surprise me and it would look exactly as I pictured it in my mind. But lately, something's been shifting in my atmosphere. And in my experience, I'm realizing that sometimes the most profound lessons come from when the script falls apart, when my flights are canceled, when the plan starts to unravel and I'm left there, standing in a place that I didn't expect, with no map, no itinerary, and just the rhythm of my own breath. In those moments when the noise quiets and the distractions fall away, you're forced to sit with yourself in a way that you might have avoided if everything went to plan. And it's in that stillness, in that unplanned space that you start to see what you've been carrying around. The weight of control, the tight grip on certainty. It's uncomfortable. It's unsettling. But it's also very sacred. Because sometimes when the plan slips through your fingertips, it's not a loss. It's an invitation. An invitation to slow down, to trust more deeply, and to find freedom in the unknown. What is going on? Beautiful people? You are listening to the Affirmations for Black Girls podcast where we focus on personal growth and cultivating a healthy relationship with ourselves. I am your host, Tyra, the creative actress, content creator, and mental health enthusiast. And y', all, I know it has been a minute. Y' all have been in my dms, baby. Y' all have been in the comments of my videos. Y' all have been in my email. Y' all have been saying, tyra, where are you? I'mma just go ahead and address that elephant in the room. It is summertime and just like everyone else, I like to take a summer vacation here and there and I ended up spending two weeks at home. Now, I'll talk a little bit more throughout the episode and in future episodes about why I spent that much time at home in a stint. Because I normally go home for like four or five days up to a week, but two weeks, I typically only do that during the holidays, but I ended up going home to Louisiana for two weeks to spend time with family and to unwind and reset and recalibrate myself. Because la, it's a place, y', all. And it definitely does a number on your mental. And sometimes you just need to get back to your roots. Sometimes you just need to be filled in a way that a place that you moved to for your career doesn't feel you in. So before we jump into the episode, because I know you guys are wondering about this title, let's go ahead and jump into our episode. Let's go ahead and jump into our affirmation of the week. Look at me. I'm a little rusty. Okay, y'. All. So this week's affirmation is I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. Let's go ahead and drop in, y'. All. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. What are some of those detours you've been taking in life lately? How can they show up as God's divine direction? Let's say it one last time together. I trust that every detour is a part of God's divine direction. I think this affirmation is so timely, y'. All. This affirmation has been like a quiet pulse that's been inside me since I got stranded in Atlanta, for sure. You know, life doesn't always come with flashing signs or bold declarations. Sometimes the lessons in life are more subtle. They are little whispers in the pauses in between moments. Sometimes they're tucked inside of the disruptions in life and the delays in life. Now, I did not ask for my trip to Atlanta and then to Louisiana to fall apart. And I didn't want to be stuck on a train for 13 hours or feel the frustration of my plans unraveling. And I'm gonna get into that a little later. But God and his wisdom used that time to teach me something essential about peace and trust and surrender. I would say that I am growing into an anxious traveler, and I haven't always been that. And something that I have been praying about lately, especially before I took this trip, because I know that I've become more anxious with travel. I've just been like, God, remove all that anxiety. You know, my heart. Hold my heart. Guard my heart from all of that stress and that anxiety. I want to work through it. I want to get past that version of myself that is such an anxious traveler. I just didn't know that he was going to take me straight through that storm, baby. Okay. I learned that peace isn't found in how perfectly your plan unfolds, but in how willing you are to release your grip and rest in the one who holds the whole story, that one being God. So today, I'm gonna take you guys through all of that tension that I felt in that situation, and we got. We're gonna sit with it and between the control and the surrender, between discomfort and the growth, to explore how sometimes the most unexpected detours lead us exactly where we need to be. Now, I know y' all are sitting over there like, tyra, what happened? Where have you been? Okay, y', all, let me start at the top. Let me give y' all the rundown. Let me give you the four. One, one on what actually happened. So. So I probably mentioned this to you guys in little Crumbs on the podcast lately, but I have been feeling homesick a lot lately, and I think the older I get, the more I'm realizing how limited our time here on Earth is. The more that I go home for short sense of time and spend more time in California for, the more I can physically see time passing at home, whether that is through my daddy getting a full white beard, y'. All. My daddy beard is gray white. It ain't got no black up in there no more. And I was like, daddy, since when it's been like that? And he was like, it's been like that. But I haven't seen my daddy since Christmas because that was the last time I was in Louisiana. And I just went back to Louisiana in July, so that's six months that had passed. Whether it's in my brother. My brother is getting grown, y'. All. He is about to turn 30 years old in September. And I can just see him forming into the man that he is or, you know, is becoming. And it's so cute, but it's just like, dang, my brother is growing. Meanwhile, I'm only 30. We're less than a year apart. But I can see that. I can see, like, his dog Bruce is getting a little older. He doesn't. He isn't as rambunctious as he used to be. He's eight now. I think he's eight. Whether it is housing or, you know, my grandmother's house or anyone's house that I grew up in, you can just see the wear and tear and the love. Not just wear and tear. It's not like, old and rickety, but, you know, places that you frequented when you were little that you haven't been to in a while, you can say, oh, wait, that's starting to do this. Or that doesn't look how it used to look. Or, you know, all of those things. I'm starting to be able to see time passing a lot more clearly, and that just makes me want to be at home a little bit more. In a nutshell. So a few weeks ago, I was sitting in my house and I was like, you know what? I need to go home. I planned on sitting my tail down this whole year. I was like, I'm not going home until Christmas. I want to sit down. I want to be in L. A. I'm living in la. Let me actually live in la. And the more that that started to happen, you know, we opened up the year here and we had those fires, and that was just so stressful out here. And then I started to. Or I got dropped from my management, and it was a lot of smaller things. We also had riots out here. Well, I don't even say. Want to even say riots. That's what the news was saying. But we've had protests and things happening out here. Everything that happened around, you know, the election and all of that stuff we've been dealing with here and throw in some earthquakes in the mix. Okay, y', all, it has just been a lot, and I have been dealing with those things without family. I mean, of course I have friends, and I'm so grateful for my chosen family, but I also have family in Louisiana that I just like to be around. And I am finally at a point in my life where I am not feeling guilty about wanting to be at home, spending time with my family, because that time is limited. So last year, I traveled a lot, and I was like, I don't really want to be bouncing back and forth like that. I went home. I can't even count how many times because my mom was getting married and my brother got engaged. All types of things. I was just going home a lot. And I was also traveling other places. I went to Thailand for my birthday. I went to Hawaii at the top of the year, New York. I did a road trip to Napa. Like, I was on the go, y'. All. And while I enjoy that, it really took a lot out of me. So my original plan was to just stay here in California and just sit down. But since being here for that long with all of those things happening, I was like, you know what? I probably need to go home. Just to reset, reconnect with my roots, spend time with my mama and daddy and my brother. You know, just be reinvigorated in a way that only your family or your childhood home or whatever can do for you. So when I was thinking about that, I was like, but when I'm. When am I going to go? And I ended up getting an opportunity from Taste Made to travel to Atlanta. And around that time, my mom was also telling me, oh, we're also going to have a birthday party for your papa. He is about to turn 70 now. This is my mama's daddy, y'. All. And I'm so blessed to still have my mama's mama and daddy, and my daddy's mama and daddy, and one great grandma still in my life. So I was like, oh my gosh, I don't want to miss that. So I sat on it for a little while and I was like, you know what? Okay. When the Atlanta opportunity came in, it was that same weekend, but it was the day before. And I was like, you know what? I'm going to do it. I'm going to go to Atlanta for the Taste Mate event. It was a grill week event. It was very fun. And then I'm going to rent a car and drive home because I'm in Louisiana. Atlanta is right there. I know it's like a eight hour drive, but the thing was, Tastemade bought my ticket. So I wanted them to split it. I wanted them to buy me a one way to Atlanta from LA and then from Louisiana back to la and the part in between that would be up to me to make sure that I got there. So I ended up renting a car through Avis and I was like, okay, I'm set now. Long story short, I am boarding my plane on that Friday morning to go to Atlanta and I get a call from Avis and I'm like, we're literally about to take off. Why are they calling me? I guess they're just calling me to confirm my reservation. They leave a voicemail and say, we won't be able to honor your reservation. So I immediately called my mama because I'm like, mom, we're about to take off. They said they can't honor my reservation, but I made this reservation weeks ago. Why can't you honor it? Because I was doing a one way rental from Atlanta to Baton Rouge. So she said that she handled it or whatever. Long story short, she did handle it, but the customer service people were not doing their job. It ended up being very frustrating, y'. All. I ended up making, like, four separate reservations. And they kept canceling them because I. There were no cars in Atlanta. As soon as I landed in Atlanta on Friday evening, there was a big hailstorm, and it took about 200, 300 flights or planes out of commission. So all of those people's flights were canceled. So then you had that influx of people who had flights that were still staying within the city. On top of that, it was NASCAR weekend. NASCAR was in town in Atlanta. And in my head, I was like, but why are they letting us book this and confirm it if you ain't got cars? Long story short, I called customer service and was like, hey, this is what's happening. They keep telling me they don't have any cars. They're not going to honor it. And they were like, that doesn't make any sense. It says there's cars available. I'm going to book you again. And I was like, literally, they said, they're not going to give me the car. And they're like, well, if they have the car, they have to give you the car. So I was like, you know what? Okay. So they scheduled me another car, and I was like, I don't trust this. So I went. The next morning, I went down to that station where they were supposed to give me a car, and they're like, look, we ain't got no cars, y'. All. The parking lot was empty. They did not have no cars. So I called customer service back again, and I was like, like, I just said, they don't have any cars, and they're not. Like, they're not going to give me a car. Like, what is going on? So they ended up making me a reservation for somewhere in Fayettevill. We have, like, extended family and friends in Atlanta, so if push came to shove, I wouldn't be able to go stay with somebody else. Like, I wasn't going to be out on the street or anything like that. Thank God. But I wanted to get home for my papa's birthday, so that was stressful. On top of having to actually work the event for Tastemade and trying to figure all of this out, and I needed to be on the road in the morning. So, long story short, they made me a reservation at Fayetteville. I was like, let me call them to make sure. They said they ain't got no cars. And I was like, you know what? What am I going to do, Tara? Let's go ahead and book a flight. So I text my mom. I said, I'm going to book a flight, and I'll Just be there. I'll just fly y'. All. Those flights were$800.800 to fly from Atlanta to Baton Rouge. That's a straight flight. 800 for the next day. And I was like, I'm not doing that. That's not happening. So I said, okay, okay, okay. What else can I do? Well, I could take a. Well, first I was. I texted my cousins. We have a group message. I said, can anybody come get me from Atlanta? I know it's eight hours each way, but can anybody come get me? And they were like, well, at least make it a last resort. And I was like, I know. Last. Last resort. Okay, can somebody come get me? And they were like, I don't know. I mean, if we absolutely had to, they weren't trying to do it. I totally get it, though. So I was like, okay, so now we got bus, and we got maybe train. I looked up the bus tickets, and I was like, I don't want to be on no bus. I just don't want to be on a bus. I've taken a mega bus. Like, when I lived on the east coast, and it was okay, but that was only from, like, philly to Washington, D.C. that was like, what, four hours, maybe not 13. So I was like, I don't want to do that. And then I said, oh, wait, Amtrak. So I looked up Amtrak, and I saw that there was a station, and I was like, okay, let's buy a ticket. So I bought a. A coach ticket at first, and it said it was going to be 13 hours. The ticket was like 60 something dollars. I don't know. And the reason I only bought a coach ticket was because I was trying to still figure out if there was a car anywhere that I can go and grab, because my mom's friend lives in Atlanta, and she was like, I'll take you as far as you need to go to get a car. So y'. All. I checked all down to Mississippi. Nobody was trying to give me no cars. And I did Avis, I did Enterprise, this other company called 6th or something. But it was like a thousand dollars to rent one of those cars, and I couldn't even leave it in Baton Rouge. I would have had to take it to New Orleans. It was just a mess, honestly. And I was like, well, why did they let me book this in the first place? That is so frustrating. I just started to spiral. I was frustrated. I was disappointed. I was feeling out of control. I was feeling out of time. I didn't want to miss my papa's birthday. I was Starting to panic a little bit. But I still had to show my face at work. I still had to work that day. So while I was working, I said, I'm going to get rid of all of that. I'm not going to think about it. My best friend Tracy was in Atlanta at the time. So I was like, girl, let's just have fun at this event. And we did. And when I went back to my hotel, I was like, you know what? I'm just going to take the train. I don't want my mom's friends to have to drive hours to drop me off to get a car when I can take the train. The only thing that I'm going to have to sacrifice is my pawpaw's birthday party. So I called my mama and I told her, okay, I'm going to take the train. So I was like, you know what? As soon as I told my mama what the plan was and the plan was locked in place again, I did feel relieved. But I was like, you know what? Let's make this a little adventure. I have been wanting to take Amtrak for the longest. And I was like, okay, if I'm going to take the Amtrak, let me go ahead and book one of the roommates. So I booked the roomette and I went to bed and I slept like a baby because I had to be up to get on that train at 9am but the point of all of that is we mourn what we expected, whether it is in our experiences, in our relationships, whatever our careers. But the growth always happens when we stop trying to glue the old plan back together. Like, I was constantly trying to find a car. Like, I spend so much time trying to find a car instead of making space for a new possibility. And that made me so frustrated, and I was just so disappointed. And I ended up being late for work that day. But they were very understanding because it was my travel plans, you know, Now I was just like, okay, Tyra, what can we make of this? How can we make this still a great experience? And I said, you know what? Let's go ahead and book this train. This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Fiscally responsible financial geniuses, monetary magicians. These are things people say about drivers who switch their car insurance to Progressive and save hundreds. Because Progressive offers discounts for paying in full, owning a home, and more. Plus, you can count on their great customer service to help you when you need it. So your dollar goes a long way. Visit progressive.com to see if you could save on car insurance. Progressive Casualty Insurance company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states or situations, y'. All. It is finally summertime, that season where everything feels a little lighter, a little sweeter, and a lot more expensive, okay? From group trips to cookouts, it's all fun and frozen drinks until that checking account starts looking a little funky. Being grown used to look like choosing your own bedtime, but it really means budgeting for gas and groceries while still trying to have a good time. And using Chime's banking features might just be the way to do it all. The moment you set up direct deposit, you can start getting your paychecks up to two days earlier, which can come in clutch when you're trying to book a flight before the price jumps up. We done all been there, okay? And because there is no monthly fees or maintenance fees, you get to keep more of your money for what matters to you. With over 50,000 fee free ATMs across the country, no need to worry about random withdrawal fees fees just because you're out of town. And if something feels off, Chime's 247 customer service is right there when you need it most. So whether you're hopping on a flight, road tripping with your girls, or just trying to enjoy a little rooftop moment, your finances should be the last thing giving you anxiety. Work on your financial goals through Chime today. Open an account in 2 minutes at chime.com affirmations that's chime.com affirmations Chime feels like progress.
- [26:08]
Chime
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- [26:21]
Tyra
I have a confession to make. I don't be eating y'. All. Now hear me out. I will sit at my house all day, stomach rumbling, focused on doing work for the podcast or honestly, just just doom scrolling and the next thing I know is 1pm and I am starving. Then I'm like, okay, Tyra, it's time to get your butt up and eat and stop playing. And then I get paralyzed because I don't know what to eat. I know we have all been there, but y', all, I have created an ingredient household. And while I love a good ingredient in a cabinet, something I realize I need in this season of my life is somebody else to plan out my meal, at least some of them. So lately I've been eyeing Green Chef. It's the number one meal kit for clean eating. And I'm liking what I'm seeing. You get to pick from over 80 options per week that are actually balanced, flavorful, dietitian approved. Amen. And designed to fit your lifestyle, even if your lifestyle changes every three days. And with specialty options like plant based, gluten free, protein packed and gut and brain healthy options, it's easier than ever to find something that fits. It's you and your goals. For example, I've had it as a goal since the top of the year, y', all, to one, eat more, but two, to eat more of the right things that are actually still tasty. And coming up with a meal plan for me is so daunting. And I'm also the type of person who refuses to eat the same thing every single day for the sake of getting my body right. The mental fortitude that it takes to eat plain chicken and rice and broccoli every day for months, y', all, I don't really care to have it, okay? But Green Chef has week to week flexibility and you can even adjust your plan to match your mood and delivery schedule. So, baby, best believe when my cycle comes, yeah, that meal plan is going to change up a little bit. And with their new heat and eat meals ready in just three minutes, plus salads and breakfast that come together in five, I'm excited to start enjoying real food real fast. And that's truly what I need. I find that by the end of the day, I'm ready to brainstorm a meal. But for breakfast and lunch during the week, oh, baby. Green Chef me, please. So make this summer your healthiest yet with Green chef. Head to greenchef.com 50 affirmations and use code 50 affirmations to get 50 off your first month. Then 20 off for two months with free shipping. That's code 50 affirmations@greenchef.com 50 affirmations let green chef handle dinner so you can get back to everything else. So I took the train originally. I booked a coach ticket. And later that night after I got back from the event, when I was back in my hotel, I said, you know what? Let me look at the roommates. Now. I've been looking at all these YouTube videos about roommates and train travel, and it has been on my bucket list. I wanted to indulge in slower travel this year. So I was like, this is actually perfect. It's something that I wanted to do. So I ended up booking the roommate. It was like $370 or something, but if you've never been on an Amtrak train, the roommates, you get your own door. It's literally like a little room. It's big enough for two people, but it was just me. And there's two seats that face each other. You even have your mirror and sink in there to like brush your teeth and stuff. You have a big window so you can see everything. And on top of you is a bed that you can sleep in. And the bottom two seats also come together to form a second bed. That's how two people can fit in there. You have your own ac, you have your own attendant, and you get breakfast, lunch and din, y'. All. It was honestly one of the most comfortable experiences that I've had. So 13 hours, I was on that train for 13 hours from Atlanta all the way to New Orleans. Now, let me be, let me be clear about this. I have never been on a train before and this was not in the cards. It was not in a plan. And the entire thing, I was, I would say it's a little outside of my comfort zone, even though I was excited to do it. But it was either spend almost a thousand dollars on a last minute flight or take this unexpected but very adventurous detour. And I chose that detour. I didn't know what to expect. I just knew from the YouTube videos that I watched it. But something in me when I was still looking for those cars and something said, okay, what other modes of transportation can I have? And train popped in. Something said, try it. And that was, God, you don't have anything to prove. And I really do have the time. Let's let it be what it is. I'll see my papa. I'll still be like home to see my pawpaw. I'll miss the party. But you know what, it's okay. I'm still going to be able to see him the next day. And y', all, the train ride itself ended up being so good. Oh my gosh. As soon as I got on the train, I felt like a kid again. I was so giddy and I was so happy in my roommate. It was so peaceful and it was one of the most enjoyable moments I've had with myself in a very long time. Now, I won't say that it was glamorous because Amtrak is not very glamorous, but it's not not glamorous either. You know, but it was quiet and it was slow and it was intentional. And the train was on time. Okay, I had my headphones, I had my snacks, I had my Nintendo Switch. And I had 13 hours to just be still not scrolling on Instagram because we ain't had no service. Not planning no content, not overthinking, not hitting a deadline. I was able to just be. I listened to music that I hadn't played in years. Some of my old playlists that I have, I even journaled a little bit. I stared out the window and I just watched the south pass by. And I just pointed out everything that I don't get to see anymore since I live in la. And I realized just how much of this scenery, not necessarily that I take for granted, but that I don't think about the beauty of. And it was just so. It was just so amazing. There were no expectations, there was no rush and no need to capture the moment. It was just me being present in the moment. And for the first time in a while, I remember what I enjoy about my own company. See, adventure isn't always a vacation or a bucket list moment. This just happened to be something that I said at the top of the year, I want to embrace slow travel. I didn't know how that was going to look, but adventure is a mindset. It's deciding to look at the unexpected as a playground and not as a punishment. The train ride that I had wasn't just a ride, it was a gift. It was a chance to step off of that hamster wheel, of the hustle and just. And go, go, go, and just take up space and observe myself. It reminded me of how much beauty there is in the. In between. I was watching a YouTube video, and that in between time is called the liminal space. It's like that in between time, between two goals that you're reaching. A lot of us at the late 20s, early 30s range, we're in a liminal space where we are trying to get to the next point in our career, where wanting to get married, we're wanting to have kids, we're wanting to buy a home, all of those things, that liminal space, that waiting period. And it reminded me of how much beauty there actually is in that. Because the liminal space, it'd be giving me some anxiety, I won't lie, especially as I come up on 31 years old. But in the moments that are slow and quiet, I don't need to be productive. So if you've been waiting for a moment to feel alive again, to feel adventurous, maybe you don't need a new city. Maybe you don't need a super planned out vacation. Maybe you just need to lean into a new perspective. The deeper lesson I walked away with is I don't need to be in control. And in fact, I realized that I never really was in control. This whole trip, from the last minute changes to the long train ride home, was a slow and quiet undoing. It wasn't a breakdown, but an undoing. An undoing of the need to plan everything perfectly and undoing of the fear that if things go off track, I won't be okay. And an undoing of the idea that value only lives in the productive parts of life. And that's honestly what this season is about for me anyway. Lightening my low before my next chapter. Again, my birthday is coming up in September, but here's the truth. Truth I had to share the part of myself that was. This isn't a good word, but addicted to the itinerary. That part of me that felt safer clinging to a schedule and knowing exactly what was going to happen. That version of me that thought I had to always be moving to be doing know what's next. But when I had no choice but to sit still, I found a lot of peace and comfort. I found that I actually enjoy a little bit of the unknown. I'm like, ooh, the unknown. And that some of my best thoughts, some of my most inspired moments and some of my most creativeness happens when I'm not trying to control the outcome of my experience. It made me think about how much weight I carry just trying to hold everything together, y'. All. How much energy I spend organizing, protecting, anticipating. That's a big one. Anticipating instead of actually living. And sometimes God will snatch the plan right out of your hands just to show you that you are still held, you are still kept, you are still safe and you are still covered. Even when it's messy, even when it's inconvenient. So maybe ripping up that itinerary isn't all about losing control. Maybe it's about gaining true freedom. And now, as I'm about to walk into this next chapter, this new season, this 31st year of life, with a little more trust, a little more softness, and a lot more willingness to let the journey take me somewhere beautiful, even if I didn't plan it that way. I think shedding the itinerary, even though it was by force, was one of the best things that happened on this ATL trip. Now, y' all know I'm a chef and y' all know I have been in my recipe testing era lately. But I'll be honest, I don't always have time for a three hour commitment or 10 random ingredients that I don't always have access to. I still want flavor and a pop of color this season, and Washington red raspberries have got me feeling inspired.
- [38:26]
Chime
Lately.
- [38:26]
Tyra
I've been dreaming of things like raspberry lemonade, a tart raspberry glaze for some meatballs, perhaps a homemade vinaigrette, or maybe even a raspberry sorbet situation if I'm feeling fancy. Oh, my mouth is watering y'. All. I'm loving that I can always get that fresh summer flavor year round. Washington state produces 90% of American grown frozen red raspberries. And since they're picked at peak ripeness and frozen literally within hours, that bright, sweet, tart flavor gets locked in. And these berries are meant to be frozen frozen. So I can keep a bag in the freezer and use them whenever inspiration hits without worrying about loss of flavor or those weird textures. So if you want to learn more details on where to find American frozen red raspberries plus recipe ideas and cooking tips, head to redraz.org that's R E D R A Z Z.org you'll find participating retailers and inspiration for every meal, plus info on how these berries go from farm to freezer with quality you can take taste for now, look for frozen Washington red raspberries at Costco, Kroger, Meijer or Winco Foods and check the bag for product of the usa. Go grab you some raspberries and get to cooking. Getting stranded in ATL taught me that adventure doesn't always come with a pretty bow or postcard views. Sometimes it shows up in the form of inconvenience, delays and canceled plans. But even in that, God is teaching. He's molding, he's preparing. He showed me that adventure is less about where you go and more about how you go. Oh, it's about how you respond when things don't go your way. When you're tested, when the backup plan has a backup plan and none of them are working okay, it reminded me that discomfort doesn't mean danger and that being alone doesn't mean you're abandoned. There's a certain kind of intimacy that happens when it's just you and God in the unknown, when you're forced to sit with yourself, to trust him fully and move differently. And the deeper I sat in this experience on this 13 hour train journey to Louisiana with no service, as I was looking out the window, the more I realized that so many of us are walking through life trying to make everything fit our script, even if we're doing it subconsciously. But God is not obligated to follow our schedule. He sees what we cannot. And sometimes he'll pause the motion to get our attention. That train ride, that stillness, that slowness, it broke something open in me. It helped me shed a little bit of the pressure that I have been carrying to have it all figured out. And honestly, I didn't realize just how tightly I was holding on to certainty until God asked me to release it. And I just love how this entire experience has been a physical representation of what has been happening in my mind. Mentally, I think we have to remind ourselves that sometimes, actually I will even argue to say, more often than not, divine detours are our real destinations. So if you feel off track, if you feel wonky, out of sync, or like everything around you is falling apart, it might just be that things are actually falling into place. You might be in your own Atlanta moment, the moment where God shifts the plans to show you something you didn't even know you needed. And it's okay to be frustrated. It's okay to have anxiety about it. It's okay to cry. But don't miss the lesson or the experience of it all. Don't miss the adventure that he's trying to take you on, even if it's a 13 hour train with no wi fi. And your thoughts and your Nintendo Switch are your only companion. You are growing, you are adapting. And more than anything, you're being prepared for what's next. Even if the current view looks nothing like the destination that you had in mind, God got you. Oh, y'. All, it is time for our fun closing segment. Today we're doing something a little different. I'm gonna give you guys a segment called Life Lately. So this is just where I'm just telling y', all basically a life update, because I feel like I ain't really been able to talk to y' all in a little minute. I. So let me know if y' all like this segment and we'll definitely try to keep it going. Hey, y'. All. How y' all been? What has been up? Yeah, I got stranded in Atlanta. I didn't get stranded like crazy, but I got stranded in Atlanta. And it was definitely a little stressful, I will say, because I've never been stranded in a city by myself and I did feel a little alone. But as I said in the episode, you're never truly alone. God is always there. And this trip definitely helped my travel Anxiety. I don't know what happened to me, but the more that I travel alone, the more anxious I become. And I am in the process of finding a new therapist, and I really want to dive deeper into that. And I can't wait to take you guys on that journey with me when I'm able to unpack that with a new therapist. But, yeah, life lately. What's been going on with Tyra? So, like I said in episode, your girl about to turn 31.
- [44:31]
Chime
1.
- [44:32]
Tyra
I'm going be 31 in September, y'. All. This is so crazy. And my brother is turning 30. Our birthdays are two days apart. His birthday is September 12th, and mine is the 14th. And he's my younger brother, so we are less than a year apart since his birthday is two days before mine. But, y', all, he's about to get married. I don't even know if I told y' all that. Maybe I did mention it, but he proposed to his girlfriend last year when we were on a cruise, and they are getting married next year. And I'm so excited for that. I just love seeing people that I love in love for one, but I love seeing people that I love accomplish things that are just so great for life, you know? So my brother is getting married, and I'm a bridesmaid. So all of the wedding festivities are about to be upon us shortly. What else has happened? I don't know if I told y' all this, but I got dropped from my representation. I don't really talk a lot about acting on this podcast, but if you did not know, I am an actress, and the biggest role that I've had to date is my role as young Amelia on the hit Netflix original sitcom Family Reunion. And that show ended a few years ago, and since then, it's been pretty slow. I mean, we've had strikes and, you know, things have been on pause because of all of that. And I haven't booked anything. So I did end up getting dropped by my management. And my original agent went out. Not original, because I had one before that. But my last agent went out of business because of legal stuff. It was a lot going on. But I recently, like, literally last week, I just signed with a new agent. And I've talked about this before, but we need to celebrate. We need to celebrate the big wins and the small wins. So I need to make some time to celebrate getting signed with a new agent. So y' all are the first people that I am telling. So, yay, I have a new agent, and I'm just Praying and believing that this is the push on the domino wheel that I needed to get these dominoes to start falling so I can get. Get some momentum in my acting career. Now, another thing that has been happening lately, especially as I think about my acting career and what I'm out here in LA for, is the fact that the thought has crossed my mind a couple of times now, is LA still home for me? And I don't. I don't really have an answer for that, y'. All. I'm really just giving you the open thoughts in my head. I don't know if LA is still home for me. I will say I've only been back in LA for a week, and I have felt out of place a little bit. But I will also say this. I feel out of place no matter where I am in the world right now. And. And it's a scary feeling. And I just mean I don't feel like any place is home. Louisiana will always be home. That state. The state of Louisiana will always be home. But I don't have a place in Louisiana that is mine. I do feel, I guess, home in my current apartment, like that I live in. I've been living here for a while, but when people say, oh, is LA home? I'm like, LA is home. What do you mean? So I will say there's still something in me that's blocking me from calling LA my home. And I don't know, y'. All. I don't see myself living anywhere else in the United States, especially as an actress or as one who is trying to get her career off the ground. I don't see myself as that, but I don't know. That's just where I am with that. I'm also feeling a pool for something different. I feel like I have been doing a lot of the same things, a lot of the same hobbies. Like, I've been boxing for a while. I've been doing pottery. I feel like I want something to shake me up a little bit, and that may be a new hobby. That may be, I don't know, a haircut. I don't know, something. I want something a little different in my life just to add a little bit of excitement. I mean, this is the time to do it. I am single. I have no responsibilities outside of myself. I should do that. Yeah. And speaking of something new. Well, this is a new. This is. This is old. I'm not gonna get. And I'm gonna say this now before I even talk about this. I'm not gonna give y' all no details. No extra, extra details. So don't tell nobody. Okay? Y', all, why did I rekindle an old flame? When I went home, I met up with an old friend, and it was so crazy. I don't even know how I'm gonna talk about this. Here's the thing about me. I don't like talking about other people in my life. So I don't. What am I trying to say? It's just weird. Okay, let me just tell y'. All. So I rekindled a no flame. I saw this guy that. We were friends a long time ago, and it was just a breath of fresh air. I will say it was. It was a breath of fresh air. That's all I can say right now. It was a breath of fresh air. I just. That's it. That's it. I will keep you guys updated. That's all I got to say about that. But in the vein of rekindling old flames, I was just thinking, like, dang, Tyra, you rekindle old flames all the time. And I don't think it's a necess. I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing, but I'm always curious as to why. I don't really. I don't know. I don't really date a lot. I don't. I don't. We don't ever make it to that stage with a lot of guys. And it just makes me think, dang, like, am I not open enough to it? Is it something with me? Or is it just the fact of the matter that I haven't met anyone, really, that is worth going to the next step with. With. And I don't know, it just made me start thinking, like, dang, I. Even though I'm rekindling these old flames, like, people have their own lives. He doesn't live here in LA or anything. And we met up when we were both at home, so he doesn't even live here. And that's another thing where it's like, okay, rekindle this flame. But we live on opposite sides of the world at this point. I don't really see anything happening there. It was just very nice to see you when we were both at home. So with that, I'm like, dang, I really would like to feel those feelings for new men I meet out here in la. And one of the biggest things about meeting men out here in la, I have never felt like I was first draft pick, you know, I've never felt like I've been priority. And it Honestly sucks. It does. And I think just the, the one thing that I missed which was very refreshing when I was talking to this old friend was the fact that I didn't have to. We had history, you know, I could just say a certain person's name and, or make a little joke about something that happened in the past and it was just good. I, that's a breath of fresh air for me instead of having to explain things. People, especially me being from the south, explaining things to guys that aren't from the south and that don't know certain things about Southern lifestyles. But that's a small thing. But the biggest thing about me meeting men out here in la, I have never felt like I'm the one. And obviously because I'm not married, that makes sense. But I've never felt like. I don't want to say I've. I don't feel pretty because I, that's, that's not the case. But I do sometimes question that I'm like, dang, am I actually ugly? And am I ugly? Like, y' all think I'm ugly? Like, what is this? I know it's not the case, but living in LA and experiencing the dating thing out here, it will have you thinking all of those things. Am I not interesting enough? Like, am I boring? Why don't you want to go on another date with me? Like, I thought it was great. Like, it's just been a lot of that back to back for me and not feeling like I am being chosen and everyone around me is being chosen and that's a little disheartening. But that's neither here nor there. That's a little bit what's been going on in my dating life. I've just been feeling a little bit sad, you know, but it's okay. It is okay. I just wanted to keep this real raw and regular. As a 30 year old girl, 30 year old woman who is dating in a place like la, I would just like to be somebody's first choice and I would just like a genuine connection, someone who is trustworthy, someone who shows up as their best self and removes all of the bullshit. Honestly, that's the best way I can put it. Like, get rid of all of that and just truly show up as someone who is like, okay, I am really trying to see if this can go to the next level. That's really what I'm looking for. But sometimes it gets a little discouraging out here. And that is my life update, y'. All. I hope you guys enjoyed this episode I know it was a little different, but I think getting stranded in Atlanta definitely helped my travel anxiety and it helped me relinquish control. And then something beautiful came out of those. Missed those canceled plans and I wouldn't change it for the world. And now I want to take a train again. So with that being said, thank you guys so much for listening. That is all that I have for you today. If you are not already, make sure you subscribe to our YouTube channel. We will have new videos coming soon. Make sure you follow the podcast, you rate the podcast, you review the podcast because those help us out so much and I love reading all of yalls reviews now. Thank you guys so much for listening. I will see you again. Oh I'm gonna see y' all on Wednesday for a pep talk. Wednesday. This is affirmations for Black Girls. Shopify is a global commerce platform that helps you sell at every stage of your business and sell more with less effort. Thanks to the Shopify Magic, your AI powered all star. Sign up for a $1 per month trial period at shopify.comredcircle all lowercase go to shopify.comredcircle now to grow your business no matter what stage you're in.
- [56:14]
Chime
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