← Affirmations for Black Girls
Affirmations for Black Girls
432 | Going to Therapy Doesn’t Mean You’re Broken, It Means You’re Growing | Pep Talk Wednesdays
00:16:01
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- [00:00]
Tyra the Creative
Why is it that as we get older, it feels harder and harder to get our bodies to cooperate? We're out here trying everything, measuring this, avoiding that, eating the yogurts, drinking those sodas and still not feeling like we've cracked the code. But what if the answer was simpler than we've been making it? Scientists now say the gut is the cornerstone of our health. It affects everything. Our energy, our mood, our sleep, even how we manage our weight. As women who just want to feel our best. I'm happy to say that Bioma takes the guesswork out of gut health with just two little capsules before breakfast. No fuss, no overwhelm, just the good stuff. Your body needs prebiotics, probiotics and postbiotics all working together to help you finally feel imbalanced. And that's backed by science, baby. So if you're curious and ready to take the guesswork out of feeling your best, visit gobioma.com affirmations today y'. All. I'm so serious. I want us all walking into this next season feeling strong, clear, and taken care of from the inside out. So again, visit gobioma.com affirmations today. That's G-O-B-I-O-M A.com affirmations Y'.
- [01:12]
Podcast Guest or Co-host
All.
- [01:12]
Tyra the Creative
Cozy season is upon us, and one thing I love at night before I go to bed, especially during these colder months, is a good bedtime story. I am super excited for today's partner because I have talked about them for years on the podcast now and that is calm. Calm is the number one app for sleep and meditation and it's here to help you feel better. If you've been rocking with me for a while, I know you already know. This app has been in my self care toolkit for a while and most times for me, it's the bedtime stories to rock me to sleep. I love the voices, the music, all of it. And I've really been into the Daily J lately. It's like this gentle dose of mindfulness and motivation that helps me reset my perspective before I start my day. And when I'm traveling, y', all, I love to listen to the Calming Flight Anxiety series by Tame Mira Levitt. I love her voice, y'. All. It scratches my brain in all the right ways. All I'm trying to say is the Calm app is just one of those things that keeps me grounded no matter what season I'm in. And as far as the meditation part goes, you don't have to be an expert to feel the difference. What I love is that it fits into real life. And having such a rich resource that helps me take care of my mental health in small, realistic ways is the kind of self care that I can actually keep up with. So if you've been looking for a little more peace in your day, a way to wind down in a very good deal, Calm your mind, change your life. Calm has an exclusive offer just for listeners of our show. Get 40% off a Calm Premium subscription at calm.com affirmations this is an amazing value. Go to c-m.com affirmations for 40% off unlimited access to Calm's entire library. Calm.com affirmations and tell Calm you heard about them from me. The moment you mention the word therapy, a lot of us still get a little uneasy. For generations, especially in the black community, and I'll take it a step further to say, the southern black community, we've been conditioned to think that if you need therapy, you're broken or weak or that you have something wrong with you. But the truth is actually the complete opposite. Therapy isn't about being fixed. It's about growing. Growing into a better version of yourself. Growing through your challenges, stretching yourself to new heights, all while having the courage to take care of your mental health just like you would take care of your physical body by working out, eating right, or going to the doctor for your routinely checkup. So just in case you forgot, you are not broken. You are not a lost cause. You are not just this way. And that's all you'll ever be. You, along with all the rest of us, are works in progress. And therapy is just one of the most powerful tools you can use to become the next level. You powerful.
- [04:16]
Podcast Guest or Co-host
Few things are as powerful.
- [04:23]
Tyra the Creative
Few things are as powerful as power. What is up, beautiful people? Welcome back to another pep talk Wednesday. I am Tyra the creative, your host and virtual cheerleader for the day, delivering a midweek pick me up that you have been craving. Get ready for some encouraging words and a dose of inspiration to brighten your day. Ready? Okay. Therapy is a buzzword. Let's call a spade a spade. It's becoming a term that people throw around to make the person on the receiving end feel less thin. But therapy in itself is not a weapon. It's a resource. It's not about labeling you or boxing you in. It's about giving you tools. Tools to help you unlearn old patterns. Tools to help you show up differently in relationships. Tools to help you see yourself more clearly. And when you start using those tools, that's when the growth starts to happen. That's when you realize that therapy isn't about fixing who you are. It's all about expanding who you're becoming. And let me say this, at its core, therapy is simply a safe space to process your thoughts and emotions, explore patterns, and learn healthier ways of moving through life with an unbiased party, I. E. Your therapist. And it doesn't look the same for everybody. For some, therapy means sitting down with a licensed therapist. For others, it's group therapy or support groups, art or music therapy, or even something that's movement based, that helps release what words can't. It can also be journaling, guided meditations, or even checking in with a life coach. And here's the biggest thing that I want y' all to take away from this episode. Therapy is not a last resort. It's not a sign that something's wrong with you. Therapy is for everyone. It's for you. It's for me. It's a tool to help you grow, to learn more about yourself and to take control of your life maybe in a new way. You're not broken, you're just learning how to thrive in the best way possible. I personally like to think of therapy just like taking your car in for a tune up or a checkup or whatever you take your car in for. Even if everything seems fine on the outside, you know you got to take your car in for a routine maintenance, right, for upkeep. And we view that as staying ready so we don't have to get ready, right? So checking the engine, the oil, rotating the tires, checking the brakes to make sure that they're running smoothly, it all prevents bigger problems down the road. Now replace that car with your mental health. Why should it be any different? Do we really just expect our bodies to run on autopilot for 80, 90, 100 years without a tune up or a check in? Therapy helps you inspect your mind and adjust what's off and strengthen what's already working so you can handle life's bumps without breaking down. And I'll give you another analogy. If that one didn't hit for you, let's think about going to the gym. Why do we work out? To move our bodies to feel healthier, to make sure we live longer, to look good naked. There are eternal reasons, right? And just like strengthening your body with reps and consistency in the gym, therapy helps to build mental muscles. So things like your coping skills, your self awareness and resilience, you're training yourself to handle life's challenges, stronger spiritual smarter and with more confidence. Just like if you played a sport and had to practice every day, but you have a game once a week. That's because practice makes what? Perfect? Well, perfect practice makes perfect. But we won't get into that today. Y' all know what I'm saying? So I want to give you a couple of practical steps about therapy. Just start small. Just showing up is the first victory. You don't need to have it all figured out. You just need to take that first step and see what it's all about. Another step, normalizing it. Normalizing therapy. Treat it like you would a regular checkup at the doctor's office. We go to the doctor once a year to get a checkup. It's about keeping your mental health in top shape so you can live your best and most empowered life. Y' all know over here we're all.
- [08:48]
Podcast Guest or Co-host
About finding hobbies that feed you. And one that's been on my to do list lately has been cozying up with an audiobook. If the AFBG book club keeps you busy but you're curious about something different, maybe something thrilling and a little spooky for the I recommend checking out Audible right now. I've been curious about The Prophecy Season 2 Kerry Washington. Yes, that Kerry Washington is back as Dr. Virginia Edwards. And when I say this supernatural thriller has piqued my interest just off the first few minutes, baby. And add in that the cast is stacked with talent and I just. I just might be hooked. I heard this new season is wild, y'. All. The fight between good and evil, family drama and those haunting visions that just keep you guessing. It's got action, it's got heart, it's got suspense.
- [09:36]
Tyra the Creative
And it comes in handy being able.
- [09:38]
Podcast Guest or Co-host
To pop it on while I'm cooking, journaling, driving, or while working on another cozy hobby.
- [09:44]
Tyra the Creative
Evil is rising and time is running out. Do not miss Kerry Washington in Audible's new action packed must listen the prophecy season two. Go to audible.com prophecy2. That's the number two. And start listening today. I don't know about y', all, but these past few weeks have had me on the go. Between traveling back home, long days of doing everything, everything for everybody, and trying to squeeze in a little fun, My body has been telling me that I need some extra TLC when I'm constantly on the move, the first things to slip are my good sleep and staying focused during stressful days. So I've been looking into what can help. And cbd FX might just be the way to go. They've been in the game for over a decade now with products that are third party tested and made from organically grown hemp. Whether you're new to CBD or already know what works for you, they've got everything from gummies to capsules to sleep aid blends designed to support your specific needs. And I love that CBD FX really prioritizes transparency and quality. You can literally scan the QR code on their packaging and see the lab results for yourself. And a lot of their products are vegan and gluten free. I've got a box of their products headed my way and I'm super excited to try them. Because listen, even when life doesn't slow down, I I still deserve to. And you do too. Whether you want calm focus, better sleep or just an overall wellness boost, CBDFX has something for you. And right now my listeners can get 40% off your first order with code affirmations@cbdfx.com that's cbdfx.com Use promo code affirmations to get 40% off today. Feel the difference with CBD FX? Every year I like to do a little life reset right before my birthday. I'll deep clean my apartment. I'll set some new goals. And lately I like to do what I like to call a little financial find out. You know, I like to take a look at what's really going on with my money before I head into a new season. It's my way of checking in with myself, asking me things like how well am I managing my money and reflecting on times where I meant to move a little something into savings, but I just just didn't. I've found out that utilizing chimes tools can really help make this process a breeze, y'. All, because with tools like the Chime checking account, you don't have to deal with those sneaky monthly or maintenance fees. If you've got qualifying direct deposit, you can even get fee free overdraft up to $200 on debit card purchases and cash withdrawals. That's a game changer for avoiding no surprise charges. Plus, with access to over four 47,000 fee free ATMs, you're never really stuck without your money. For me, it's about making sure that my finances aren't another source of stress weighing me down. Amen. Having a safety net and some flexibility, it truly makes a huge difference for your mental health. If you're ready to breathe easier and take your financial audit into a new direction, work on your financial goals through Chime today. Open an account in 2 minutes at chime.com affirmations that's chime.com affirmations Chime feels like progress.
- [12:58]
Chime Disclaimer Voice
Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancor Bank NA or Stride Bank NA Members FDIC Spot Me Eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Timing depends on submission of payment file fees. Apply it out of network ATMs, bank ranking and number of ATMs according to US News and World Report 2023 Chime checking account required.
- [13:27]
Tyra the Creative
Now Let me also say this therapy is not just about dealing with your past trauma. It's also about setting yourself up for success in your future. It's not a sign that you are broken, like I've been saying. It's a tool to help you understand yourself better, to make smarter decisions and show up as the person that you want to be. So imagine walking into a room full of challenges and instead of feeling overwhelmed, you feel prepared, equipped, you feel ready. That's what therapy does. It gives you mental clarity. It gives you perspective and practical tools to thrive and not just survive. And here's the kicker. The more you know about yourself, the more confident and unstoppable you become. Therapy isn't only for working through the hard stuff though, it does that too. It's also about learning what triggers you, discovering patterns in your thinking, practicing healthier ways to cope, and gaining strategies to communicate better with the people around you. It can also help you manage stress, strengthen your relationships, have a better sex life, and even uncover strengths that you didn't know you had. You get to define what it means to you. Taking that first step isn't about admitting weakness or defeat or anything crazy like that. It's about claiming your power and giving yourself this space to grow, evolve and show up fully in your own life. Therapy can also help you grow your confidence, your decision making skills, and your ability to navigate life's challenges so you don't need to have it all figured out to begin. So here are some simple ways that you can ease it in. Sign up for a short session or a check in with the therapist and it can help give you clarity on where you need to be. I personally started out with better help. I when I first started with better help, I was terrified. I said, you know what, I'm just gonna see what it's about. I'm just gonna have this one 30 minute conversation with this lady and then we gonna go from there. And I ended up loving it. I had a virtual session with her. It was face to face Virtual. It was like on Zoom or something like that. And I thoroughly enjoyed it. In that first session, I think she only asked me like two questions and she allowed me to talk. She gave me the space to just blurred out anything that I wanted to blurt out. So also try to explore different formats, whether it's in person or the virtual sessions like I had. Maybe group therapy, if you don't want to do it alone. Even journaling prompts or guided meditations or guided mental health apps like meditation apps like Calm Headspace, those types of things. Pick what feels accessible to you and treat it like a doctor's appointment, like a checkup, just like you would see a doctor for them to just check and make sure that your bones are right, your blood is right, your organs, all of that therapy keeps your mind in shape in the same way. You can also ask some questions up front. You can check how a therapist works and what approaches they use, even if you don't really know much about it. Just ask them how do they operate or if they have worked with clients like you in the past. And it is okay to be picky. I always say that going to therapy and picking a therapist is just like dating you. Just same way you date that woman or that man. Maybe you need to be dating your therapist as well, because every therapist is not going to be a good fit and you don't have to take the one that you are given. Same way if you was going to the doctor, if you ain't like your doctor, what you gonna do? Go find a new doctor, right? It's the same type of scenario. And then also try to combine your tools together. You can pair therapy with meditation. You compare therapy with mindfulness exercises or even journaling. And that can also help to boost your insight and your growth. I know with my first therapist, she was giving me a lot of mindfulness activities to do in comparison in conjunction with our therapy sessions. And then notice some patterns. Pay attention to the things that trigger you or the recurring thoughts that you have and bring them with you into your sessions so you can explore that with that unbiased party that is there. And then start to reflect after a session or after an exercise you do. Take a moment, take inventory and notice what felt helpful or what felt surprising or what felt uncomfortable, what you want to dive into more. All of that stuff. I say all this to say. Therapy does not have to be complicated. Small steps add up and over time they can give you more confidence, clarity and control over your life. One session at a time, y'. All And I know I'm repeating myself over and over, but especially in our community, there is so much misinformation and so much taboo around therapy. I just want to say this as many times as I can until I'm blue in the face. Because therapy does not mean you are broken, it means you are growing. So if therapy has been on your mind again, start small. Look up some therapists in your area if you want to go in person. Explore your options online. I've told you guys about BetterHelp or read about different approaches to see what feels comfortable for you. Even a single session or a short consultation counts as progress. And I have also included a couple of online resources in the show notes of this episode. So make sure you guys check them out. And if you're already in therapy, take stock of what you've learned and how you've applied it and celebrate the growth and think about what you'd like to explore next. What's next for you? Growth is not linear. It happens in steps. And every insight does matter. Now I also want you guys to share your journey with someone that you trust in a non invasive way. I regularly update my daddy and my grandma specifically on my therapy journey. Just because I talk to them and it comes up and seeing me navigate it has encouraged them to try therapy too. You don't need to convince anybody. Just showing them your own progress can be inspiring and give be the push that they need. So every pep talk comes with a challenge of the week, as you guys know. And this week's challenge is this. And I really, I urge you guys to do this. Take one small step forward towards nurturing your mental health. Book a therapy session, journal a reflection. And if you join, if you choose to journal, let's do like three pages of reflection. Revisit a breakthrough that you have had and share your wins with me on social media. If you have something picture worthy to share, post it and tag us at Affirmations of Black Girls on Instagram or shoot us an email or a dm. But I really want you guys to take that initial step if you haven't already. And if you are in therapy, share it. If you don't want to share your wins with me, share with somebody that you love. Somebody that could possibly benefit from hearing how you are progressing in your mental health journey. Taking that first step into therapy can feel scary and uncomfortable, but it's also one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself. When I first started therapy after my very first session, I already felt the load being lifted off of me. And for me, this journey has helped me learn how to open up, how to think critically and not be so quick to explode or shut down. And I've learned how to better conduct myself in triggering situations. And as a single girl, I've learned just how much of a role my attachment style and my love languages play in my dating experiences. Once I was able to better understand how I respond in various situations, I had the playbook that I needed. I could move through these challenges with way more confidence. This journey is all about investing in your clarity, your confidence, and your peace of mind above all else. And if you're comfortable sharing a little of your journey with someone that you trust, like I do with my daddy and with my grandma, it can spark something unexpected. You're not here to convince anyone else. Just showing up for yourself is more than enough. And trust me, people are watching. My grandma and my daddy both started going to therapy because of me and because of this podcast. You deserve to be your best self. Now, therapy isn't magic, but it is a tool that helps you grow, get stronger, and move through life with more confidence. You got this. You are capable. You are resilient, you are unstoppable. Every step you take matters, and the journey on is so, so worth it. Now that's all that I have for you guys today. I really hope you enjoyed this pep talk. I know I repeated myself a lot, but this is something that I feel very strongly about. Your peace of mind and your confidence to move throughout the world is super important. And therapy is a tool that can help get you over a hump that you may not have been able to get over yourself. It's a growing tool. It's just there to help you. It's a resource. So again, I have linked some resources in the show notes of this episode, and if you're watching on YouTube, I have linked some of them in the description box down underneath the video. And with that being said, make sure that you take part in the challenge of the week. There's multiple parts to it, whether it's you going to therapy for the first time, doing a little bit of research on some mindfulness activities, sharing a breakthrough with myself, the Affirmations for Black Girls team, or even a trusted loved one.