425 | Why Mistakes Are the Recipe for Growth | Fake It Till You ‘Bake’ It: How to Fail Forward With Grace and Welcome Sweet Surprises into Your Life.

Summary

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Affirmations for Black Girls: Ep 425 — “Why Mistakes Are the Recipe for Growth | Fake It Till You ‘Bake’ It: How to Fail Forward With Grace and Welcome Sweet Surprises into Your Life”

Host: Tyra (Ty) The Creative
Guest: Tyra B. (Book Club Lead, Copywriter)
Release Date: August 25, 2025

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Episode Overview

This episode explores the necessity and beauty of mistakes as a pathway to personal growth and joy, using the book Fake It Till You Bake It by Jamie Wesley as a catalyst for the discussion. Ty and Tyra B. chat about how “failing forward” helps us unlock new lessons, relationships, and, ultimately, a sweeter, more authentic life. The episode weaves in reflections on perfectionism, authenticity, faking it till you make it, finding joy, and stories from both hosts’ lives, all centered around Black women’s journeys towards resilience.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Power and Purpose of Mistakes (01:08–06:27)

• Ty opens with a heartfelt reflection:

  “Growth doesn’t always come with a plan. Sometimes it looks like you saying yes before you’re ready…You don’t need permission to start. You just need belief. You need heart. You just need a little audacity.” — Ty (01:08)

• Both hosts emphasize that what feel like “missteps” are often divine course corrections, crucial for personal development:

  "Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter." — Tyra B. (05:11)
  “Nobody can go through life making the right step every single time.” — Ty (06:31)

2. Book Club Feature: “Fake It Till You Bake It” (08:21–13:35)

• Book premise: Jada, rejected on reality TV, rebuilds her life through a fake relationship at a cupcake shop.
• The romance novel’s “fake dating” trope is discussed as a metaphor for experimenting, failing, and eventually discovering genuine success and love.
• Ty: “Success can start in the most unexpected places. Like in our book, it can start in a bakery. Maybe it can start on a reality show…”
• Both hosts enjoy the “baking as a metaphor for love”—it’s a labor of love, requiring effort, patience, and willingness to start again after failure.

3. Societal Narratives About Failure & Personal Reflections (17:28–22:08)

• Society teaches us to dread failure, but both Ty and Tyra B. advocate redefining failure as part of progress:

  “Failure just means…when you give up, not when you have gotten a certain grade on something.” — Ty (21:23)

• Stories of academic “failure” from both hosts illustrate how setbacks are actually redirections, not full stops.

4. Faking It vs. Authenticity (22:47–27:43)

• “Fake it till you make it” sometimes gets a bad rap; the key is to remain true to oneself while learning new roles.

  “I just had to vibe in there for a while until I got my footing…and had to have a lot of things explained to me. But that's the only way to learn.” — Tyra B. (23:10)

• They discuss workplace impostor syndrome, LA’s culture of inauthenticity, and why truly knowing yourself grounds you in authenticity:

  “I don’t have lie in me…putting on a mask takes so much energy.” — Tyra B. (27:09) “The seat at the table will always be there for me, where God, my name is on it.” — Ty (28:25)

5. Baking Joy Into Your Life: Hobbies and Rituals (31:27–39:00)

• Both women discuss actively seeking out joyful experiences—hobbies, hosting, community, spirituality—as adults.

  “We have to actively find joy in everyday life. We have to actively live a life that we want to live.” — Ty (31:16)

• From swimming to pottery, audiobooks, and baking, they highlight the importance of trying new things and returning to meaningful rituals.

6. Celebrating Small 'Cupcake Moments' (40:20–44:00)

• Tyra B. shares hitting 200 YouTube subscribers as a “small win”; Ty announces a dream culinary collaboration:

  “I just got a collab opportunity with my favorite cookie place in West Hollywood…It’s so sweet. You is that girl.” — Ty (43:54)

7. Reflections on Growth, Authenticity, and Surprises (44:06–45:57)

• Ty sums up:

  “We are not our failures. We’re not our detours…We’re dynamic people, constantly becoming, constantly unfolding…Real connection and growth don’t come from perfection, but from the courage to show up authentically as you, even when it feels scary or uncomfortable.” (44:06)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the necessity of failure:

  “Society…feels like such a stop and go thing. Like, the word 'failure', that's such a harsh, hard stop word.” — Tyra B. (17:28)

• On faking it authentically:

  “Everybody just be faking it till they make it. Like, literally. There's nothing to like—what is the alternative? Having it all together the first time around? You ain't gonna never get nowhere.” — Ty (24:16)

• On culinary metaphors for resilience:

  "Baking is always attributed to being a labor of love." — Ty (14:55)
  "Baking is so hard, but it’s something about it that makes you want to do it again and do it right." — Ty (13:44)

• Philosophy on authenticity:

  "The people that are living deep within inauthenticity, 1, have not taken the time to get to know their true selves, and two, are just literally trying to live someone else's life..." — Ty (27:43)

• On finding adult joy:

  "As a kid, you have people signing you up for clubs…As an adult, you gotta go find them." — Tyra B. (32:43)

• On Black women's need for self-focused joy:

  "This is the time to be selfish in our joy…to try all of the new things without any repercussions or…responsibility." — Ty (32:01)

• On faith and soulfulness:

  “I need a little bit more soul work right now…physically going to church and finding more Christian friends.” — Ty (40:20)

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Fun Segments

“Rank ‘Em” — Best Desserts (45:58–56:28)

Ty and Tyra B. rank their personal top five desserts (cupcakes, brownies, cheesecake, cookies, pie), sharing opinions, memories, and a little bit of Southern nostalgia.

• Consensus #1: Brownies!

  "I love me a brownie. Sometimes I just let it sit in my mouth...Brownies are so good I can make myself sick eating brownies." — Ty (52:21)

• They reminisce over family favorites like buttermilk pie, pecan pie, and pound cake, and admit there’s no definitive “best” dessert—joy is so often in the homemade, the nostalgic, the “rustic” treats.

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Book Club Details & Closing Notes

• Read with AFBG: Join the book club (links in show notes/description) for two books per month—one self-help/professional, one romance.
• On “Fake It Till You Bake It”: Ty and Tyra B. praise the book's lightness, relatability, and metaphorical depth. Some critique of romance tropes and side characters’ development is noted.
• Encouragement to listeners:

  “If you feel like you’ve been faking it, keep letting it cook…every misstep is really just a setup for something sweeter.” — Ty (45:45)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:08] — Opening reflections on unplanned growth
• [05:11] — Affirmation of the week: “Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter”
• [08:21] — Book premise and selection for book club
• [13:35] — Baking as a metaphor for love and growth
• [17:28]–22:08 — Societal attitudes towards failure, personal stories
• [22:47]–27:43 — Navigating “faking it” and authenticity
• [31:27]–39:00 — Baking joy into daily life; adult hobbies and community
• [40:20]–44:00 — “Cupcake moments” and personal wins
• [44:06]–45:57 — Reflections on letting go of perfection
• [45:58–56:28] — “Rank ‘Em”: Top five desserts
• [57:00+] — Favorite flavors, nostalgic treats, closing

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Episode Tone

Warm, uplifting, deeply personal, and conversational—imbued with authentic Southern Black womanhood perspectives, humor, and a nurturing, “sister circle” energy.

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Listener Takeaways

• “Failures” are essential ingredients for eventual sweetness and success.
• Authenticity and joy are ongoing, deliberate practices, not destinations.
• Community, creativity, and vulnerability are indispensable on the path to healing and growth.

Recommended for anyone craving community, healing, and gentle encouragement to embrace the messy, delicious journey of self-discovery.

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Transcript

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[Tyra B.]

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[Ty]

You ever find yourself standing in the middle of something that you didn't plan for, but somehow it feels like you are exactly where you're supposed to be? Like you're fumbling your way through, thinking that you're behind, but looking back, you realize that you are truly learning the whole time. That's been me for more seasons than I can count. And the truth is, growth doesn't always come with a plan. Sometimes it looks like you saying yes before you're ready. Showing up nervous, trusting yourself enough to figure it out along the way. And it's not about knowing everything, but it's about being willing to just try. You don't need permission to start. You just need belief. You need heart. You just need a little audacity. What is going on?

[Tyra B.]

Beautiful people.

[Ty]

Welcome back to the Affirmations for Black Girls podcast where we focus on personal growth and cultivating a healthy relationship with ourselves. I am your host, Ty, the creative actress, content creator and mental health enthusiast. And today you guys, we have a super fun episode. This is a video episode, you guys. So if you are listening on your favorite podcast listening platform, feel free to stay. Or you can head over to YouTube and you can watch me and Ms. Tyra B. A lot of you guys know her. She is over our book club. Today we have a super fun episode. We are discussing one of the books in the book club. But do not stop there. Y'. All. Do not turn this off because you don't have to have read this book to listen into this episode. So without further ado, Ms. Tyra B. Say hey to the people.

[Tyra B.]

Hey to the people.

[Ty]

Hey, y'. All. Hey, y'.

[Tyra B.]

All. Is that too country?

[Ty]

Hey, y'. All. We both country. We both from the South. So, Tyra, tell everybody who you are and what you be doing for the podcast.

[Tyra B.]

Okay, well, hi. Hello. It's me, Tyra B. But you guys might know me as Tyra, too. I write the newsletters. I do copywriting. So that means I'm writing a lot of words for the podcast, like the ad reads and the newsletters. But, you know, I've been around for a little bit.

[Ty]

She has, y'. All. Tyra has been around for. It's been over a year. We just had, like, came up on a year. When was that? Two months ago?

[Tyra B.]

Something like that.

[Ty]

A year and some change. Yeah, some change. But you were an avid listener of the podcast before.

[Tyra B.]

I was listening before. And that one episode where you were like, I need to hire some people one time. And I happened to catch it right before the deadline. I was like, hey, literally right before.

[Ty]

And when you sent it, I was like, girl, why did you. Why didn't you just text me? I was like, girl, yeah, of course. Boom, you had the job right then and there. Because, baby. Okay, so just. You guys know what we are talking about today? I think there's something special about a fresh start that comes after falling apart. And we're gonna talk a lot about. We're gonna talk a lot about falling apart and, you know, picking up pieces, picking them back up, putting them back together. But the book that we were talking about today is Fake It Till youl Bake it by Jamie Wesley. It is a novel. It's a two part series, Right. Two or three.

[Tyra B.]

I believe it's going to be three. But right now there's two books out because, you know, it's three main male characters.

[Ty]

Yes. So it's the two part series right now. Maybe gonna turn into three. And it is a romance novel. And I absolutely love a good romance, y'. All. I'm not a huge reader. I'm not gonna even lie to you. Not super huge. But this is a book that we're gonna be discussing today. So if you did read along, this was an August read, right? This was an August read. That if you interested in romance novels, baby, you add this to your list. Okay? So in this book, Jamie reminds us that joy often comes disguised as a detour. And let me tell you, our girl Jada. Ooh, girl.

[Tyra B.]

Jada.

[Ty]

She took a huge detour. But before we jump into that, we have to do our affirmation of the week. So I'm going to hand it over to Tyra B.

[Tyra B.]

This week's affirmation is. Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter. Let's take some time. Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter. Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter. Every misstep is a setup for something sweeter. Now, I don't know if y' all hearing that like, I was hearing it, but the something sweeter, that's a little something to be hopeful for.

[Ty]

Exactly. The thing is. And I was just listening, every misstep is a step towards something sweeter. I don't really believe in missteps, for real. You know what I mean? Like, because God orders every single step that we have. But we do consider the missteps, because it's like a course correct. That's happening, and it's like, oh, shoot, okay, this isn't working. Let me go ahead and sidestep over here. And we don't know what is to come, but literally everything. It's just saying, everything's together for your good. Yeah, it's a step. It's just a step. Because nobody can go through life making the right step every single time.

[Tyra B.]

There is literally no perfect pathway at all.

[Ty]

Like, literally exactly. I think so many of us feel like we have to have, especially in this day and age, as millennials that are entering real adulthood because we've been adults, but we. We actually adults now. Like, for real, for real. We was. We was kid adults. Yes. But now I. I feel like a lot of us think that we have to have everything figured out before we do take that first step. But the truth is healing and growing and even success can start in the most unexpected places. I'll be the first one to say that I didn't know I was going to end up here. I didn't know that my life was going to look like this at almost 31 years old. I was actually just on the phone with Janae last night, and I was telling her. I was like, girl, this. I did this when I was 21. This was happening to me when I was 25. And she was like, it just seemed like you live four or five lives. And I was like, yes.

[Tyra B.]

Low key, low key, low key, high key, high key, high key.

[Ty]

I live so many different lives, and I think that alone, as I've gotten a little older, has Shown that you don't have to have everything figured out. You just got to put one foot in front of the other and literally keep going. But success can start in the most unexpected places. Like in our book, it can start in a bakery. Maybe it can start on a reality show like a girl's Jada. You know what I'm saying? It may be a relationship that you didn't see coming. I've had a couple of those as well. And it's just so invigorating, I guess. But breaking the rules a little, you never know, because you might be able to find yourself dessert first.

[Tyra B.]

A little something sweet.

[Ty]

So before we jump all the way in, y', all, I want to give y' all a little premise of the book. So I'm going to read the actual back cover of the book here. Okay. Jada Townsend Matthews is the most reviled woman in America. After turning down a marriage proposal on a reality dating show, when she comes home to lick her wounds, Jada finds herself working at San Diego's newest cupcake bakery, Sugar Blitz, alongside the uptight owner and professional football player Donovan Dell. When a reporter mistakenly believes Jada and Donovan are an item, they realize they can use the misunderstanding to their advantage to help the struggling bakery and rehabilitate Jada's image. Faking a relationship should be simple, but sometimes love is the most unexpected ingredient. Fake it till you bake. It is a sweet confection of a novel. The perfect story to curl up with while enjoying a cupcake on the side, period. Girl, I. First of all, what you thought about the book, how we. How we even got here.

[Tyra B.]

How did we get here? Because you picked this book. I. Since I, you know, kind of run the book club, I did select all the books, and I did specifically put this for August. Our August theme was learning. Like, I think continuing education as an adult is what the theme is, and I think Jada learned a lot of skills, and so I thought this was an appropriate read for August. Back to school season. Trying something new. I originally read this book last year.

[Ty]

Okay. So you told me about it. You was just like, oh, I think this would be great. And tire you a chef.

[Tyra B.]

Exactly.

[Ty]

Oh, this is Burbank. This is Burbank. I love it.

[Tyra B.]

I remember liking it back then. I think I read it in December. I remember liking it, and I wanted to share it with the world. I read both books, actually, so I. I know Tea that you don't know.

[Ty]

Well, I do know that the second book based on one of his friends. Which one? Andrew Nathan. Andrew, Nathan. I don't even know if that's their names. Anyway, y', all, I'm horrible with names, especially in books, but it's Donovan's sister. Okay, Donovan's sister.

[Tyra B.]

And. And his teammate, who is also one of his business partners. But aside from that, I really enjoyed this book. It was a cute little, fun little romance read. I'm a sucker for fake dating trope. Fake dating, fake relationship. I don't know how many of y' all know about tropes about in romance books, but there's a couple that I take a liking to, and this one has the fake dating trope.

[Ty]

I don't like it. Here's the thing. In real life, don't fake it. Yes. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

It's not very realistic.

[Ty]

Don't fake date me. You better date me for real. And that's the thing. So that's what I wanted to get into because I. Y', all, literally, me and Tyra were sitting here getting everything set up, and I was like, oh, I just wanna. Nope. I'm. Wait till we talk. I'm. Wait till we talk.

[Tyra B.]

I want to hear.

[Ty]

I. I mean, we can also leave it a little bit, but I think this is the segment that we're actually talking mostly about the book. I. When it comes to romance novels, I don't read too many of them, y'. All. I read a couple of them. I've read a couple of them, and I feel like so many of them start like this. They hate each other, then they fall in love, and then they break apart, and then they come back. That's the whole thing. And I'm just like.

[Tyra B.]

That's the whole spiel. The.

[Ty]

The up down for every single one. And it's like, I. I want to not see coming. But that didn't stop me from loving this book. Like, I. Look, literally, I did audiobook. So I'm cheesing, girl.

[Tyra B.]

I'm kicking my feet two times. Speed.

[Ty]

Okay. Exactly. And that's the thing. I knew that. So this is a black romance as well. And that's. I don't think I can really read anything that I don't see myself in.

[Tyra B.]

Right.

[Ty]

Let me ask you this. Who, when you think of Donovan Dale, who you think about?

[Tyra B.]

I don't want to say Russell Westbrook, because that's not the same vibe. That's like the first football player I could think of.

[Ty]

It don't even have to be a football player, though.

[Tyra B.]

I don't know. Because, you know, the football players they built.

[Ty]

Yes.

[Tyra B.]

I don't know I'd love to see a fan cast. I wanna. I wanna know who other people want to see in these roles because I.

[Ty]

Be having to have people in my brain now. I ain't gonna lie. I had real people in my brain. Like, all right, I had real men. That's for, like, from my past in my brain. I was like, okay, I can see this. I can see this. But if I had pick like a celebrity or something, girl, it had to be Aaron Pierre. Okay, okay, we gonna move on. We go, move on. But it'll have to be him anyways. Chugging right along. Let's talk about the metaphor of this because we're talking about, like, missteps and, you know, finding the sweetness in life. I love how the metaphor of baking was used for their love story as well, because it's both literal and it's emotional. It takes time. Love takes time. Baking takes so much time. It takes effort. Effort. Love takes effort. Exactly. And it also takes especially. And I know this too well because I already went to culinary school, a willingness to try again when the recipe fails.

[Tyra B.]

For sure.

[Ty]

That's the hard part.

[Tyra B.]

I baked a little bit in my day, and the reason I don't bake as often is because baking is hard.

[Ty]

Baking is so hard. But it's just so. And it's just so crazy because literally that's what I was about to say. Like, literally, you can just change baking to love in all of this that we're talking about right now. Baking is so hard, but it's something about it that makes you want to do it again and do it right. Yes. And do it. Get it right the next time or work to it until you get to a place where you are comfortable in it.

[Tyra B.]

Comfortable. Cheesing.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

Possible. It is. It is. I think my favorite thing to bake was blondies. And it took a while to get that recipe down because I. I was messing up a lot. The ratios.

[Ty]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I actually haven't ever made blondies.

[Tyra B.]

Delicious.

[Ty]

They are really good. I've never made them, though. I. You know, a lot of people always ask me, tyra, what'd you like to make? What you like to make? What you like to make. And I'd be like, I don't know.

[Tyra B.]

I don't like to make anything.

[Ty]

Jesus. I like to make new things. Like, literally. That's my answer. I like to make something new that I don't make all the time. But croissants will be my favorite thing. But that is a labor.

[Tyra B.]

That is a Labor, love.

[Ty]

And that's right. Like this is. This book is just so perfect because baking is always attributed to being a labor of love.

[Tyra B.]

Truly. It truly is. Because, like, without the labor of love, then ain't no love. Right?

[Ty]

Right.

[Tyra B.]

All that effort and experience, something to work towards.

[Ty]

Y' all want to know what I love? I love the feeling of coming home after a long day when the sun is still out. But I'm winding down on my couch and I look around and I realize that every corner of my apartment has a little piece of my personality. I love that so much. Wayfair has been my go to for those things that really pull a room together, like my bar cart. If y' all follow me on Instagram, then y' all have definitely seen it. I got it for Wayfair and it's cute and still super functional. I always dress it up super cute when I'm hosting friends over, and they always give me the best coffee compliments on it. I truly find the cutest kitchen accessories that are affordable on theme for my quirky apartment and that get delivered straight to my door super fast. Y', all, they got all kinds of stuff. They got work from home setups, they got cute organizers, they have appliances. Meanwhile, I didn't have my eye on that ninja slushie and a portable grill. But, y', all, I decided to get something that I actually really needed. I just got these gorgeous bar stools. Well, they're bar chairs because they got a back on it that really add that extra razzle dazzle to my space. They got yellow cushions and the legs are silver and the back of the chair is a light rattan material. Y', all, they add the perfect pop to my kitchen. As soon as they got delivered, which they got delivered in two days, I put them together and I'm so in love. And I'm so glad that I picked the ones that are silver and a pop of color, because my accent color in my house is a lot of gold. But I was like, nope, I'mma mix some metals. And they fit so perfectly. But anyways, y', all, I got the shopping bug now. So if you're craving a little home refresh before fall, Wayfair has got your back. And y' all already know Wayfair. They got just what you need. Anyways, y' all get organized, refreshed, and back in the routine for way less, head to wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. That's wayfair.com wayfair every style, every home.

[Tyra B.]

Let's get into what society kind of says about failing and, like, how we feel about that. Because I feel like society, it feels like such a stop and go thing. Like, it feels like such a hard stop. Like the word failure, like, that's such a harsh, hard stop word that people kind of feel like they have to overcome when reality is just like, it's part of the motion. It's part of, like, life. Honestly, like, for me, I feel like a lot of people might be able to relate, but I was. I was one of them little smart kids, you know, I wasn't gifted. And then I went to college, like, straight A's everywhere went to college, started getting these different. And I also finished college during COVID So that. That's, It's.

[Ty]

That is so crazy to me that you was in college. That is so crazy.

[Tyra B.]

That was my senior, literally my last semester of college.

[Ty]

Oh my gosh.

[Tyra B.]

And so that brought a lot of failure. Yeah, I was supposed to graduate that semester and I didn't because I had, like, other life circumstances going on. And I really had to reshape the way I was thinking about my life at the moment to keep it pushing, really, because, like, you fail a class, you know, I wasn't trying to fail. Yeah, I was taking care of somebody. I didn't. I didn't want to fail. But who does, right? Like, who wants to fail? So I really had to reshape, reconfigure the way I was, like, viewing tasks, viewing life, and just kind of, kind of. I definitely got to a space where I had to just ignore the social norms, ignore what society was saying, because everybody's, oh, you got to graduate in four years. Or like, some people are like, oh, you have to do it. Like that same semester. I didn't graduate college on paper until a full, what, year and a half after that, really? I graduated on Christmas Eve of 2021 because of, like, a really last minute assignment for sure. Um, but it got done. It got done.

[Ty]

And that's all that matter to, like.

[Tyra B.]

The failure, you know, I had to reconfigure, but the work I had to put in helped get to the finish line.

[Ty]

Yeah, I think. And that's the thing. Like, I. With school specifically, I think we are industrialized because when I was so I was valedictorian of my class period in high school, and I was like, oh, yeah, I have to. I have to get the best of the best. I have to be the top of the top. And then when I went to college, I was like, oh, well, I mean, I have to double major. So I was. Girl, yes, I was. I was a double major. So I went to Northwestern State University and they had scholars college, and through scholars, I would have gotten a degree in liberal arts. And I was like, okay, I'll do liberal arts and I'll also do my theater degree that first semester. So I failed a class. No, I didn't. I'm lying. I didn't fail the class. I'm lying. I got my first F in a class, and it. I was no good. I was like, me the first time.

[Tyra B.]

I was like, it's possible.

[Ty]

Tyra with an F. Tyra with an F. With an F. Exactly. And I was like, this is just so crazy. So after that, I was like, I felt like a failure for my whole freshman year because I was like, well, I can kiss valedictorian goodbye because I ended up passing that class with a B. Like, I've only. Throughout my entire college career, I graduated early, all of that stuff. I got two Bs. And I knew I wouldn't be valedictorian, but I was so sad because it was like, that's what I wanted. That's what I wanted. What the hell? But I quickly changed my thought process around it, and I was like, okay, well, college ain't even about that. Like, that's not even. That's not even about where you're from.

[Tyra B.]

That's not gonna mean nothing.

[Ty]

It's not gonna mean anything at all. So I think when I have kids, especially teaching them, that first of all, failure just means. Failure is when you give up, not when you have gotten a certain grade on something. Because as long as you keep pushing and try again and or better yourself, like, that's not even something that you need to be worried about. I think we. We as a society definitely care way too much about failure. There are so many people that are doing better than me that don't have a college degree. Same like, failure, it's all subjective to who you are and your personal experience. For sure. I don't believe in failure unless I literally like, failure equals giving up to me. Yeah, that's what I say.

[Tyra B.]

Some stuff be making me want to.

[Ty]

Give up, but yeah, but if we gonna keep it going, like, I haven't failed, girl, don't get me started. So the title of the book is fake it till you make it. Let's talk about the difference between faking it and being authentic. I know a lot of people will say, fake it till you make it. And I guess that's where this title comes from on this book. But tell me a time when you was faking it in life. Maybe it became an authentic experience, but a time when you had that fake it till you make it type of mentality.

[Tyra B.]

Very much so. My first full time job, girl.

[Ty]

What were you where that was at? Oh, wait, in Manhattan Beach. Was that your first full time?

[Tyra B.]

Huntington Beach, I mean.

[Ty]

Yes.

[Tyra B.]

Yeah. Farther.

[Ty]

Oh, shoot.

[Tyra B.]

Farther.

[Ty]

And you drove, which is crazy.

[Tyra B.]

I was driving. They promised me hybrid, and then they took that away, sweetie. But that was my first full time job. Was. I literally got it, I think two weeks after I moved to la.

[Ty]

That's good.

[Tyra B.]

While I was still finishing an internship. So I, like, started. It started like a full month after I moved. But my. My role was community manager and junior copywriter. And I was fresh out of two internships with very little job experience. So I was. Felt very lucky. Yeah. That I was even offered the job. They did feel a little desperate the way they offered the job, but that's neither here nor there. But I was definitely, like, I got dropped into, like, the ad agenc environment without having a ton of experience. So I just had to, like, I just had to vibe in there for a while until I, like, got my footing and had to have a lot of things explained to me. But that's the only way to learn. So I was definitely, like, you know, eavesdropping here and there, taking exactly. Literally doing what you're supposed to do to learn. So I was definitely faking it, but, you know, I made it.

[Ty]

But I was about to say, then.

[Tyra B.]

You made experience, Right?

[Ty]

Because then when I met you, I was just like, okay, this is dope. This is what she do. She is about this life.

[Tyra B.]

It's like, boom. Portfolio.

[Ty]

Exactly. Boom. That and I feel like everybody just be faking it till they make it. Like, literally.

[Tyra B.]

There's nothing to like.

[Ty]

What.

[Tyra B.]

What is the alternative? Having it all together the first time around?

[Ty]

You ain't gonna never get nowhere ever. I think for me, I would say that I was faking it when I was the head pastry chef at Black Bottom Southern Kitchen.

[Tyra B.]

Speak on it.

[Ty]

Here's the thing, y'. All, I never wanted to, like, work in a commercial kitchen. I just wanted to go to culinary school because I graduated from college early and I needed something else to do. Time instead of getting into the real world. That's it.

[Tyra B.]

That's fair.

[Ty]

And I just wanted to hone my skills. And I moved back to New Jersey for a boy. So it all just worked. It all just worked out. That Way. But when I got the job, they were like, oh, you're gonna be the head pastry chef at this restaurant? I'm like, how? I moved here in 2017. Exactly. 2017. How old am I? Like, 23 years old. And I'm the head pastry chef at this place. What?

[Tyra B.]

Those are big shoes to fill.

[Ty]

Exactly. So I was like, okay, well, I'm a. I'm a do the damn thing. I don't have nothing else that I can do outside of doing it. And every day I walked in there, I was like, well, this is what I would do. That's it. And I said stuff with my chest. I was confident. I had a small team working under me, and I stayed in that job for two and a half years. And then, you know, Covid happened and all of that type of stuff. So it eventually closed. The business eventually closed down. But I loved every second of it. But I would not go back. But it did teach me that I can do hard things. And just because I'm young doesn't mean that I can't be in positions of power. That's what it taught me. But I was faking it. I ain't know what I was doing. Scared. Exactly. Okay, so we're talking about faking it. But then there's also a level to it where it can reach inauthenticity. And I think, especially living in la, we come across a lot of people who may be just living an inauthentic version of themselves. So how can we differentiate? What do you think about that? Because. Let me bring it back to the book for a second. I don't think. Not even one time, except for maybe that initial, like, first kiss between Jada and Donovan, that it was inauthentic. It was. It was just, like, faking it until you made it to where you needed to be. But they were still deep down, their authentic selves. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

They were being themselves with each other. I don't know if Jada was being herself with herself, but that's a different. Right.

[Ty]

That's a. That's a different story. But they were. It didn't give inauthenticity for me the. Y', all. The book is so, so good. Y' all gotta read it. But. Yeah, like, what. How do you, like, keep yourself from being inauthentic? I don't even think it's in my blood to be inauthentic. Like, I just. It's just not.

[Tyra B.]

Like, I'm not a liar.

[Ty]

I don't.

[Tyra B.]

I don't have lie in me. Like, put Putting on a mask, I feel takes so much energy. Unless you're really in that. And I feel like you would have to be in it for money. Because I'm not. I'm not spending all that energy being fake and inauthentic for nothing.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

Like, there's not. There's no, Not a ton of clout to be chased. So, like, I'm not really into that. So, like, I don't know, it just feels like a choice. I know it's very possible for people in LA to come off inauthentic, but, I don't know, you just kind of find the people. You can spot them a mile away.

[Ty]

You definitely can. I think the people that are living deep within inauthenticity, 1, have not taken the time to get to know their true selves, and two, are just literally trying to live someone else's life because they think clout. They think it'll get them further than where their true self can get them. And I'm like, I'm not. We only got one life to live. I don't have time for that.

[Tyra B.]

I don't want to be nowhere I'm not really supposed to be.

[Ty]

Exactly. Why do you. Why would you want to be somewhere that ain't for you?

[Tyra B.]

Speak on that.

[Ty]

Like what? Especially as a black person. Baby, I don't want to be.

[Tyra B.]

I don't need to be in all the spaces.

[Ty]

Look, I don't. I don't. Because the thing is, the seat at the table will always be there for me. Where God, my name is on it. Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

The chair can go with me.

[Ty]

Okay?

[Tyra B.]

My name is on my chair.

[Ty]

God's got a blessing with my name on it. That's my song.

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[Ty]

I think I went through a time in my life where I had to bake the joy back into it between the years of 2016 and 2019. So in 2016-2017, I lived in New Jersey. Girl, I did not care about my life. We're not even gonna get into all this stuff. I was telling. I was telling Janae all of the details. Maybe I'll tell the podcast one day. But I. I did not care about my life back then. I was doing the utmost because I was a sad little girl, but. And then when I moved out to la, I was in a relationship that I didn't want to be in. I was taking care of a grown man. It was so stressful, and I didn't truly get to enjoy basically my whole 20s. I didn't really start enjoying life again until maybe, like, 27, 28. And I realized that we have to. And I've talked about this on the podcast before, but we have to actively find joy in everyday life. We have to actively live a life that we want to live. Like, we can't be out here being inauthentic. It's a waste of time.

[Tyra B.]

It is a waste of time.

[Ty]

I just.

[Tyra B.]

Energy for.

[Ty]

Exactly. I feel so strongly about that. And so now I'm like, okay, well, what are some ways that I'm baking joins my life? I'm not. You said it the other day. I'm the hobby.

[Tyra B.]

The hobby queen. Well, I don't even remember what I said the other day.

[Ty]

The hobby queen. Exactly. And. And that's it. I just. Just subconsciously, I was like, okay, I want to do stuff that makes me literally happy. That's it. Boxing, pottery, gardening, baking, decorating my house, hosting more. I'm about to have the ice cream social. I haven't even told you the date of the ice cream social. I gotta. Girl, I gotta decide.

[Tyra B.]

All of your Sundays open.

[Ty]

Leave your Sundays open. It's gonna be probably in two weeks. Honestly, not even gonna lie.

[Tyra B.]

That might be the best.

[Ty]

Yeah, yeah, it's probably gonna be in two weeks. But, yeah, stuff like that. Like, we actively have to bake the joy in. We can't just wait for things to come our way, because once again, we only have one life to live and both of us are single, as in not married and not having kids. This is the time to be selfish in our joy. This is the time for us to try all of the new things without any repercussions or without all of the extra responsibility that come with having a husband, a house, kids, all of that stuff. I think we're in the prime time to bake bacon. New joy every day. Okay.

[Tyra B.]

Any which way you can think of it. Add in some sprinkles.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

Some berries or something. Because I was thinking, like, as an adult. Because, like, as a kid, you have people signing you up for clubs.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Offering you, like, hobbies and stuff. As an adult, you gotta go find them. Yes, as an adult, you got to go find them.

[Ty]

And that's a learning curve that we don't talk about. I'm like, oh, shoot, my mama not about to just fill out this registration form for me to play soccer.

[Tyra B.]

No, you gotta. You gotta do it yourself. You gotta pay the fee yourself.

[Ty]

Exactly. Paying the fee is where it's at.

[Tyra B.]

You gotta be. If you want to. You gotta be disciplined to, like, carry out. And that's why, like, paying for some certain stuff upfront kind of help. But, you know, my hobbies are the audiobooks. I think I read a little too much.

[Ty]

Tell these people how many books you done read this year, Tyra?

[Tyra B.]

As of Yesterday, I read 52 books. That was my reading goal, was 52 books for 52 weeks of the year. 50. I hit my goal.

[Ty]

This girl read 50. It's August. I mean, congratulations. But it is August. And meanwhile, a lot of these books. Well, she picked all the books for the book club, y'. All. So if you are not already a member of the book club, the link is down below in the description or in the. Well, if you're on YouTube, in the description, if you're listening in the show notes of the episode. But we have a fun time over there. And once again, fake it till you bake it. That's one of us. But we do two books. Tell them we do two books a month.

[Tyra B.]

Yeah, we do two books a month. And the. The main book is usually, like, self help or it has some kind of message advice that we want people to, like, take with them for the month. And then I wanted to make sure we always have, like, a romance alternative book for all of our, like, lover girls in the chat, because, you know, we're all lover girls at heart.

[Ty]

We really are. I. I really enjoyed this book. I'm not even lying. And I loved listening to the audiobook version. I know my friend Alexis. She cannot read an audiobook. She wants to put, like, the voices in her own mind, like, you know, people.

[Tyra B.]

Yeah. Sometimes a narrator will stop me from.

[Ty]

Listening to a book.

[Tyra B.]

Oh, yeah, I'll save that for later. Yeah.

[Ty]

100. Like, what books are they, like? The Wedding Proposal. Who wrote Jasmine? Not. I was about to say Jasmine Guy. What's her name?

[Tyra B.]

Jasmine.

[Ty]

Jasmine Guillory. I cannot read her books because of the narrator. And it's not that. I just don't vibe with the narrator's voice. I was like, it's not that her voice is, like, hard to listen to or anything. Well, it's hard for me to listen to. I don't vibe with it. I just don't vibe with it, y'. All.

[Tyra B.]

I feel like one time we talked about how the audiobook sometimes will have somebody of a different country with an accent, and the book is, like, set in New York, and I know that British people exist in New York, but.

[Ty]

But why is you British reading this book about the New York subway?

[Tyra B.]

No, thank you.

[Ty]

Exactly. I need to be able to fully immerse myself in that. So you can tell that the narrator is black on this book here. And also when I was reading the Kiss Countdown. Absolutely.

[Tyra B.]

I appreciate when they. When they keep it consistent.

[Ty]

Yeah. Yeah, I definitely love that. How do you feel about books that are. We're getting off topic, but it don't matter. How do you feel about books that are, like, dual narrated? Like, if it's a woman and a.

[Tyra B.]

Man, I. I like it. I like it to. So it helps. It definitely helps differentiate the character sometimes. But some of these female narrators, these black female narrators, be killing it. Like.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Their little deep voice, you know, it's not gonna do too much.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

For you. But, yeah, I can tell that it's the other person that. That's the main thing that matters.

[Ty]

Yeah, that's true.

[Tyra B.]

They do a good job.

[Ty]

That's definitely true. Yeah. I. I enjoy it. I. I don't know what it was. I'll have to look on my audible, but it was. Was it Kennedy Ryan? No, it wasn't Kennedy Ryan book, but it was a book that I read. Super short read. And it was dually narrated. And it just felt like I was watching tv.

[Tyra B.]

Exactly.

[Ty]

Or a radio show. Let me say a radio show. Like it. I was like, oh, I actually like this. I like this a lot. Like, I want to listen to more books this way, because some people be like, oh, it's an audiobook you didn't really read. Girl, leave me alone.

[Tyra B.]

Yeah. I'm a big proponent on. If you think audiobooks aren't real books, then you're ableist.

[Ty]

Yeah. Okay.

[Tyra B.]

Because, you know, that's. That's not.

[Ty]

It literally is the book. It.

[Tyra B.]

It helped. It's the book wrote the Book.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

I bet I know what it say. And I bet you don't know what happened. And I do.

[Ty]

Exactly. Because I'm not about girl. I can't.

[Tyra B.]

I can never find the time to sit down with the. And I also do it for, like, financial reasons. Like, I try not to spend money on books until I know that I like them. So audiobooks are, like, for the most part, a free, easy way to, you know, figure out what books you like.

[Ty]

Yeah. Because you can use Libby. Tyra uses Libby. I use Audible. I do buy credits on Audible for mine. Back to baking the joy. So for you, what joy have you baked into your routine lately? And what routine or what rituals do you want to return to? Or if there are any, for sure.

[Tyra B.]

Lately, I've been making sure to utilize my apartment complex's pool. Ooh. I get my little floaty tube. I put in my AirPods, and I'm listening to a book in the pool while my phone is over on the. On a table.

[Ty]

Okay.

[Tyra B.]

I've done that like, four times this summer already. Okay. And I'm rocking with it. There was one book I read that was like a shark romance.

[Ty]

Shark? Oh, like it was Animals in Love.

[Tyra B.]

No, the. The two characters, they're black. They are black. The two characters are like shark researchers.

[Ty]

Oh, okay.

[Tyra B.]

And my silly self was listening to it in the pool, and then I started having a panic attack. But, yeah, that is one way that I'm trying to enjoy LA while I live here. And I don't really have any. Any inklings to move anytime soon. I do like it here.

[Ty]

The weather helps. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

But I want to take more advantage words. I want to take better advantage of the stuff that I have in my apartment complex and then local communities events and stuff. I want to make sure I get back into that.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

So what are. What are some things you're trying to put into your routine?

[Ty]

Put back into my routine. I think the biggest thing that I'm trying. I was just talking to my mom about this. The biggest thing that I'm trying to put back to my routine because I'm doing all of my hobbies. Like, that hasn't.

[Tyra B.]

Luckily.

[Ty]

Yeah, that hasn't stopped. I do want to do more hosting and stuff. I'm having an ice cream party, and I have some stuff planned throughout the rest of the year. But the biggest thing that I want to put back into my routine is physically going to church. Right. I really need to be back in the house of the Lord so I can see how.

[Tyra B.]

How it could get Stagnant. And kind of become a passive thing if you're only doing, like, online.

[Ty]

Yeah. It's just so crazy how Covid really made us a virtual first society. It's so crazy. And I'm still. I still see myself in that a lot. And I'm like, okay, I need to. First of all, I need to find a new church home, or I would like to. I would like to find one that's like. Like closer to home so I'm not commuting so much. And, I mean, I get it. I was going to one church, and it's not that. That far, but I grew up. Church was 2 minutes up the road, girl. Okay.

[Tyra B.]

Walk to my church.

[Ty]

Exactly. Walk. So you can walk. Yeah. So I want to. That's a question I'm looking for. I want to put that back into my routine, actually physically going into church and also finding more Christian friends so that we can, like, do Bible study and, you know, things like that. That's. That's the thing. That's the top of my list, for sure.

[Tyra B.]

Nice, Nice. Something for the soul.

[Ty]

Yes, exactly. Yes. I need. I need a little bit more soul work right now. So I would say that for me. What's your cupcake moment? Like, a small moment that. Or like a sweet win that reminded you that you really is that girl? Like, you got this.

[Tyra B.]

Like, this feels like we were just talking about being fake in LA people, but this feels a little something. But, like, I recently hit 200 subscribers on my YouTube channel, and my channel also just turned 8 years old. For the longest, longest, longest. My goal was 100 subscribers, and I think I got that, like, last year. And so to see the jump. And I've also been actively trying to be more consistent with the content and stuff. You have Seeing. Seeing that number. Seeing two, two oh, two on my little. My little app right now. I'm like, not. There's people wanting to listen to me.

[Ty]

Right.

[Tyra B.]

Okay, I'll make some videos for y'.

[Ty]

All.

[Tyra B.]

I'm sorry.

[Ty]

That's coming. That's good. 200 people is a lot. Imagine too much people in this room right now.

[Tyra B.]

Exactly. That's what I'm telling myself. Like, I would be very overwhelmed.

[Ty]

Okay. Exactly. Cupcake moment for me. Okay. I told you this already. Maybe that's why I wasn't thinking about it. But nobody else, really. You're, like, the only person I told this. I just got a collab opportunity with my favorite cookie place in West Hollywood.

[Tyra B.]

Cookies.

[Ty]

This is so on brand for this, actually. So Junior Cookie is my favorite Cookie place. I first had them, I did like a. I went to an escape room that had just like. Like, had they launch party, opening, grand opening, whatever. And they had these cookies in this pink box. And I was like, okay, let me try one of these cookies. Fire.

[Tyra B.]

Oh, okay.

[Ty]

Delicious. And the. This is back when crumble was, like, at the top of their game and everybody was getting crumble cookies. And I was always like, crumble cookies are so big. They taste good. They're. But they're super sweet. But they're also too big. Like what?

[Tyra B.]

They're big and they're a very particular texture.

[Ty]

Yes, exactly. So junior cookies are like mini size, so they're like, probably about a little bit bigger than a half dollar, honestly, which I love. So they're palpable. It doesn't feel too indulgent if you eat the whole box that you get, because they come in, like, sets of two, so you can get like four cookies. And I'm like, okay, I don't feel bad eating these because it. If you put them all together, it adds up to less than one. Less than one crumble cookie. So I've been following them for a while, and I'm always going to. I'm going over there to get cookies. So that day that I first had them, I immediately went into the store. It's a mom and pop shop. It's actually a mother. Yeah, it's a mother and son. They make everything in house. They took me to the back so I could see everything because I was like, I came straight here from this, and they're like, oh, yeah, we did make those cookies today. And I was like, I love these so much. I'm also a pastry chef. I love what y' all are doing, baby. I'm being here every week, and for the longest I was in there every week, I was also getting people gifts from there. So I just got to know, like, the mother and son and all of that stuff. And they messaged me on Instagram a few weeks ago and were like, hey, do you want to do a collab cookie? And I was like, what?

[Tyra B.]

Well, I surely do.

[Ty]

Me. Yes. So I'm super excited to do that. It's gonna probably be in October when we actually go live with the flavor. And I was like, I want to make it a thing. Like, I want. Whenever it goes live, I want to be able to say, hey, y', all, like, do like a. Not a real pop up at the place, but, you know, like, let's pop up and let's all taste this cookie. At the place. That's what I really want to do.

[Tyra B.]

That's a very sweet moment.

[Ty]

It's so sweet.

[Tyra B.]

That's very sweet. You. You is that girl.

[Ty]

I'm that girl.

[Tyra B.]

What Beyonce said. What? She said, I'm that girl.

[Ty]

I'm that girl. We are not our failures. We're not our detours. We're not even our best or most careful laid out plans. We're dynamic people. We're constantly becoming, constantly unfolding, and there's so much room to surprise ourselves. So there's a moment in the book when Jada finally lets her guard down with Donovan, and she stops pretending that she has everything under control, and she stops faking the best version of herself, and she just shows up honestly with her messy feelings, her fears, her hopes, her dreams, all of it. And it's raw, it's vulnerable, and it reminds us that real connection and growth don't come from perfection, but from the courage to show up authentically as you, even when it feels scary or even uncomfortable. I think it's a beautiful example of how sometimes we truly do have to fake it a little until we can bake the real thing, the genuine joy, the love, and the confidence that come from simply showing up as ourselves. So if you feel like you've been faking it, keep letting it cook. Or should I say, keep letting it bathe? Because every misstep is really just a setup for something sweeter. Oh, y', all, you know what time it is? It is time for our fun closing segment. And today's closing segment is what we got. We have. Rank em.

[Tyra B.]

Rank em.

[Ty]

Oh, God. Okay, so today we're gonna be ranking our top five desserts.

[Tyra B.]

Personally, these answers might be different.

[Ty]

They. You know what? I think they may be different. And I have to know. I have to think if I'm gonna rank it as a pastry chef or as just, like, as an enjoyer. Yeah, you can do both. I'm gonna probably. Yeah, I'm gonna probably mix it up. Okay, so we. On the list, we have cupcakes. We got brownies.

[Tyra B.]

Correct.

[Ty]

We got cheesecake, we got cookies, and we got pie.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

I'm immediately putting cheesecake at number five. Well, here's. Here's. My. Here's. Here's why I'm putting cheesecake at number five, because I don't ever gravitate towards cheesecake. If there is anything actually, I'm lying. But say if there are any other rest of them on the list or in the vicinity, I'm probably not gonna go for the cheesecake and the only market research I have on that is I was at a potluck the other day and I grabbed a cookie and I brought cupcakes.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

It had cheesecake there. It had brownies there as well. I did not go for either one of those, honestly.

[Tyra B.]

Tell him.

[Ty]

I love a key lime pie, which is technically cheesecake, but it's not cheesecake. For real. For real. Because it's only made with eggs and sweetened condensed milk. For real. And then a little bit of lime juice.

[Tyra B.]

You know all the chemistry.

[Ty]

I just know what it tastes like. Yeah. So, yeah, it's not a cheesecake because cheesecake is made with cream chess. So. But I love, like, going to Cheesecake Factory. You know what? Let me rethink.

[Tyra B.]

No, no, no, no. Don't try to switch it up now. You said cheesecake at the bottom.

[Ty]

Okay, okay. That's how I'm doing. I'm doing mine off of how much I eat these. I don't never go, like, I'm gonna give them cheesecake. I don't never say that ever. Okay, so what's your number? We'll both go up at the same time. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

Five for me is cheesecake.

[Tyra B.]

I'm thinking if I had each of these things in my house and at the same time. At the same time. And I could eat one a day for a work week. But I'm saving the best for last because that's how I get down pie. Pie is at the bottom, pies at the bottom.

[Ty]

You know how many pies it is out there?

[Tyra B.]

I do know how many pies it is out there. And there's only two of them. Like, two of them I like.

[Ty]

But cheesecake is only cheesecake you put toppings on.

[Tyra B.]

You ever had brownie cheesecake, red velvet cheesecake?

[Ty]

I mean, yeah, I've had. I've had red velvet cheesecake. I've never had brownie cheesecake, though. Okay. All right, all right. So I, for four, not even gonna lie. I'll have to go cupcakes.

[Tyra B.]

I'd also go cupcakes.

[Ty]

Yeah, I have to go cupcakes on for it.

[Tyra B.]

No shade to Donovan.

[Ty]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Doing that much.

[Ty]

They don't. But here's the thing. Whenever I do have, like a good cupcake though, I'm like, oh, my gosh, I want another one of these.

[Tyra B.]

And for me, I don't like sprinkles. Oh, yeah, I hate sprinkles. And a lot, like store bought cupcakes come with a whole bunch of sprinkles. I don't want that hard, crunchy stuff on my stove.

[Ty]

Exact. That hard crunchy stuff on my.

[Tyra B.]

I'm eating a cupcake.

[Ty]

Exactly. I don't buy store bought cupcakes.

[Tyra B.]

Well, yeah, that makes sense.

[Ty]

Cuz yeah, they be putting those hard sprinkles on there. The icing is made with Crisco or lard or something like that. More so. Exactly. It's not pleasant on the palette. But yeah, like, like if I have a cupcake with like a little bit of ice, normally I will just knock the frosting off.

[Tyra B.]

I'll take off a lot of the frosting as long as I get off all them sprinkles.

[Ty]

Yeah, yeah, I definitely will do that. But I do love a good cupcake. But yeah, it's definitely not at the top of the list. I would go three. I'm going cookie.

[Tyra B.]

Oh wow.

[Ty]

I'm going cookie for number three.

[Tyra B.]

For number three. I think I'll go cheesecake.

[Ty]

Okay.

[Tyra B.]

I want cheesecake to be higher. But the other ones.

[Ty]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like I know where we going for number one. I feel like I know where we going. Cookies for me. Cookies are great.

[Tyra B.]

Cookies are great. Cookies are versatile.

[Ty]

They are. But if I see a cookie, a brownie and a pie, I'm going to pick the brownie or the pie before the cookie especially.

[Tyra B.]

Really?

[Ty]

Yeah, especially if it's like I love sweet potato pie. I really do. I also love my grandma's buttermilk pie and my grandma's white potato pie. Like those types of pie. I'm not just talking like regular pie. Like apple pie is good, but I'm not. Some people are like total slurs for apple pie.

[Tyra B.]

Yes. Apple pie has like its own culture these days.

[Ty]

Yes, yes, it definitely does. I'm not a slur for that, but I do love like a, a fun pie. Buttermilk pie, white potato pie, chess pie, Mississippi mud pie.

[Tyra B.]

See these are, these are like family.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Like deep family. Because you're not just gonna find an easy recipe for that on Pinterest. Like you gotta know somebody or somebody. Yes. Who knows somebody. Put it on Pinterest.

[Ty]

Yes. And you only getting these pies during the holidays.

[Tyra B.]

We might make four and you might be able to take one home.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

We not making this in like March.

[Ty]

Exactly. I think I'm gonna make pies this, this holiday for people if they want them. I might do that. What we on two. Okay. Well we gonna know what number one is? Okay, so. So let's do this. Our, our number one pick. We're gonna say at the same time. Are you ready?

[Tyra B.]

Gonna count down?

[Ty]

Yeah, I'm countdown. Okay.

[Tyra B.]

Three, two, one.

[Ty]

Brownies.

[Tyra B.]

I love me a bro.

[Ty]

Now, the brownies are so Ralph's. No, they do the. I get the little individual. Yeah, I get the. I get the.

[Tyra B.]

And they be having the ones with the little cheesecake swirls.

[Ty]

Oh, I haven't got no. Then they. I need to try. Brownies are so good. I can make myself sick eating brownies. Same. I'm like, oh, my God. Sometimes I just let it sit in my mouth. Like, I just be like, all right, too much. Okay. Like, I just let it sit in my mouth, though. For real.

[Tyra B.]

I just love a brownie. Like, anytime I get a brownie, I'm like, I just need a scoop of vanilla ice cream as well. And I. I don't need it to be warm, but a warm brownie.

[Ty]

Brownie.

[Tyra B.]

A brownie.

[Ty]

Oh, I might make brownies today.

[Tyra B.]

And then my problem is that, like, I love blondies, too.

[Ty]

I need to have more blondies.

[Tyra B.]

I love a blondie. Like, I. I once perfected my blondie recipe, but now my oven is messed up, so I can't make it as often as I want to. But brownies, Blondies. Yeah, we go together.

[Ty]

I love it. So that means my number two is pie. Your number two is cookies. Cookies.

[Tyra B.]

I wanted to ask, how do you like your cookies? Are you a crispy cookie?

[Ty]

I'm not. I'm a soft. It needs to be soft. But I don't like underdone cookies. I just don't like it, like, super chewy. Unless I'm actually having a shortbread cookie. I want my shortbread. Yes. I need that snap. I need that snap. I gotta have that snap on my cookies. But I am a slower for store bought cookies. Like, I love famous Amos. I love the Lotus Biscoff cookies. I love the. I was gonna say Pillsbury, but it's not Pillsbury. Pepperidge Farm. Oh, my gosh. All of those are good. And then the elf. What is. What is the. Like.

[Tyra B.]

Oh, the. The key. Keebler.

[Ty]

Keebler.

[Tyra B.]

I do love me a keyboard.

[Ty]

Oh, my gosh. Oh, yeah, I love. I love those cookies. But that's the type of, like, hard cookie I like.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

If it's like a bakery cookie, I need it soft from the interior to the exterior, baby.

[Tyra B.]

Okay? All right. I like.

[Ty]

I like the edge, okay.

[Tyra B.]

Not too much of a chew or undercook in the middle. But I do like it to be crispy and, like, a little soft. Like A little. Little bendable. Little bend and snap.

[Ty]

Yes, A little bit in the snap. Yeah. I love a stroopwafel, too. Like those.

[Tyra B.]

I do love a stroopwafel.

[Ty]

Oh, my good. Oh, I haven't had. I've seen them, but I didn't get them because I was like, I like the actual brand that we'd be getting on the flight sometimes. What is that? United have those? Who have those? Somebody used to have them. Somebody used to have them because I used to bring my brother one every time I would fly home. It had to be United or American. I'm the only two that I be. Yeah, but yeah. Okay, so cookie number two. Okay, so our top definitely came. So. So I got. My lineup is brownie pie, cookie, cupcake, cheesecake.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

And you got brownie, cookie, cheesecake, cupcake pie. Yeah. That's so crazy.

[Tyra B.]

I know. The pie being at the bottom is not sitting right with me.

[Ty]

No, it's not. Because pie is good as hell.

[Tyra B.]

I only really like, like, pean pie.

[Ty]

I love a good pecan pie. All right, yeah, stop. Let's move on. Let's move on.

[Tyra B.]

Let's move on.

[Ty]

Move out.

[Tyra B.]

It's just that I grew up on a pecan farm. My great grandmother had pecan trees. I know how to crack them.

[Ty]

No, really. I used to go pick pecans with my great grandma, my great grandma Lily, my paw paw mama all the time. Meanwhile, I made my pawpaw a pocket on pie from the Pocons from his tree. When I went home for. Was that Christmas this year? Last year, I think that's when. Yeah, that's when I made it. I made him that and a pineapple upside down cake. It's just all those rustic southern trees. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

Yeah, exactly.

[Ty]

I. I prefer that over any of these. That's on this list, though. Like the rustic ones that you only get at the house. Like a jelly cake or a tea cake. Sake to me cake.

[Tyra B.]

I just want like a. Like a normal. Like a nice pound. Yes. Nice pound cake with ice.

[Ty]

Yes. A nice pound cake.

[Tyra B.]

Lemon pound.

[Ty]

Seven UP cake.

[Tyra B.]

Oh, I think I had seven upcake for the first time. Something you threw. I don't remember what it was you threw that I came to. It wasn't your birthday party. I don't think you didn't have. That was the first time I had beignets was at your birthday party.

[Ty]

Really? Oh, my gosh. I didn't know that. Okay, I gotta have more. I gotta do more beignets as well. I'm trying to think what's gonna be the fun thing at the ice cream party. But I think it's gonna be funnel cake.

[Tyra B.]

See, I ain't put funnel pick exactly.

[Ty]

We. That's the thing. We can't even really rank. For real. Yeah, yeah.

[Tyra B.]

I was trying to five basic.

[Ty]

Yeah, we had the basic. Okay, so outside of these five, what's your go to? Like this is. Hold on, I got a two part question. So in the book, the best selling flavor that Donovan had at Sugar Bliss was vanilla. And I'm just like, what is with this Vanilla? Vanilla, Vanilla. Vanilla. Vanilla. Ain't no way. And so what's your favorite flavor outside of everything? Favorite flavor, dessert. And outside of these five things, what is your favorite dessert outside of these?

[Tyra B.]

I think vanilla might be the one of the best flavors to ever exist. Especially with some Madagascar vanilla.

[Ty]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

I. I'm a vanilla girl. I love anything that can come in vanilla. I might want to try that first. I do love vanilla. So that's my favorite cupcake flavor. I do love a red velvet cake, but that's very touch and go. We had that, those red velvet little bites at that event. That was the best. The AI event.

[Ty]

Oh yes.

[Tyra B.]

That was the best red velvet cake in a while. But it was just a little bite. Yeah, you gotta. You got to make it the right way. You got to do the vin. It's vinegar, right?

[Ty]

Yeah, vinegar and baking soda. Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

The chemical reaction you need that. I've been really into to store bought donuts lately.

[Ty]

Really?

[Tyra B.]

Donuts donut holes. They've been kind of good.

[Ty]

I love a good donut hole though. I'm not even going to lie.

[Tyra B.]

Sweet treat kind of girl. And we usually don't have a ton of sweet treats in the house, but I think we have three in the house right now, which is a bit much. But my favorite dessert consistently is Ben and Jerry's strawberry cheesecake pint.

[Ty]

Fun fact, I don't get jiggy with.

[Tyra B.]

Ben and Jerry's and that's why I do the strawberry cheesecake because it's the most basic flavor they got right.

[Ty]

Like they be doing. It'd be too much of a party in my mouth. It's a absolute rager. And I don't like ragers in my mouth. I don't, I don't like.

[Tyra B.]

Most people wouldn't.

[Ty]

But speaking of your favorite flavor. Yes. Vanilla reigns supreme. My favorite ice cream flavor. Vanilla. Ooh. My favorite icing flavor. Vanilla, Vanilla buttercream. But outside of the desserts that we talked about, including pies and all of that. I would say I am a total slur for beignets. For real? Like, for real for real, for real, for real. No, like, not for fake.

[Tyra B.]

Like, I've never had a beignet I didn't like.

[Ty]

Oh, my gosh. You probably won't ever have one. Like, it's. They're so good. Oh, you know what else I like that's not. Well, I mean, this can be a dessert, but it's not really a dessert. Biscuits.

[Tyra B.]

Okay.

[Ty]

Oh, God.

[Tyra B.]

You that kind of country. You country. You funny. Yes.

[Ty]

A good biscuit with, like, a peach jam. I sounded real country. Said that.

[Tyra B.]

With a peach jam and some whipped cream.

[Ty]

Okay.

[Tyra B.]

Strawberry cheesecake.

[Ty]

Oh, my gosh. Yes. That's a. That's a good dessert as well. Anyways, that's it.

[Tyra B.]

That's it. Read the book if you want to read the book. Yes, it's a good book.

[Ty]

Yes, y' all read the book.

[Tyra B.]

There's a sequel.

[Ty]

Oh, yes. And then let's just talk about the ending. I.

[Tyra B.]

First of all, what was you gonna say about the. Or did we already cover it?

[Ty]

What?

[Tyra B.]

What, you didn't want to tell me before you wanted to wait.

[Ty]

I can't remember what exactly it was I was about to say, because I was, like, tired.

[Tyra B.]

Stop thinking about it.

[Ty]

What was it?

[Tyra B.]

What did Donovan do? Was it during one of their scenes?

[Ty]

I didn't like how he just let her walk away. I didn't like how he just. I didn't like how his friends and I get it. That is probably because they gonna make, like, three books, and each of the friends. Friends get a book. But the friends were too, like, not standoffish, but they were too out of it for me. They were uninvolved. Yes, they were too uninvolved. I wish the friends would have said a little bit more other than the little bit of corpse that they had every now and then and been like, dude, go ahead and date this girl. Like, what are we waiting on? Like, why did it take 20 something chapters for this? And then at the end, like, dang, they got engaged.

[Tyra B.]

When I feel like that's how a lot of these books go. It be. It do be making me mad in the epilogue that they be like, oh, we got engaged one year later, or we're already pregnant one year later. And I'm like, savannah, slow down.

[Ty]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But then I'm like, okay, well, that's looking like, what's going to be my life now? I'm about to be 31, baby. You got four months to marry. To marry me. You got four months. Well, you got, let me see, six.

[Tyra B.]

And a half ticking time. Time's still ticking.

[Ty]

You got six and a half months from us dating seriously, to us actually, like getting married. Yeah. Getting engaged. Not getting married. Getting engaged. Because my line sister, she got engaged and she was married before the six month mark. And I was like, girl, yes, yes. But they had been dating for a while, but still like six months. Don't play with me. Because I still want, no matter how old I am or maybe when I get older, I won't say this, but I still want like that first year for just us. I don't want to like, just have kids right when I. Yeah. So come on.

[Tyra B.]

And then to some degree when you, when you find. When you find the person and you know, you know.

[Ty]

Yeah.

[Tyra B.]

So it's like, yeah, we're in a rush, but there's no real reason for a rush. But it's kind of in a rush.

[Ty]

Yeah, I'm in a rush now because I ain't got no prospect. That's really what it is.

[Tyra B.]

Don't say it like that.

[Ty]

Well, I mean that in the best way possible because I'm like, okay, don't waste my time when I'm talking to men. And I'm like, okay, if you waste my time, I really got to move around, like, for real. That's it. But anyways, fake it till you bake. It was a very good book. Let me, let me know if you guys enjoyed having Ms. Tyraby on the podcast. If you want to see her around here alive more, just let us know and definitely join the book club. You'll hear from her twice a month.

[Tyra B.]

Month. Twice.

[Ty]

Twice a month. And then in the fable group discussions and all of that, you'll hear from Tyra B. A lot more. If you join in on the book club and you can read at your own pace, y'.

[Tyra B.]

All.

[Ty]

It's not. It's not.

[Tyra B.]

You don't finish that, that month.

[Ty]

Exactly.

[Tyra B.]

You gotta read both.

[Ty]

Exactly. Yes, exactly. So I had fun. This was really good. I. I really want to do more of the bookish type of episodes. This was fun. So thank you guys, you guys so much for listening. If you're not already subscribed to the YouTube channel, make sure you go ahead and hit that big red subscribe button down below if you are watching on our YouTube channel. But if you are listening on your favorite listening platform, make sure you leave us a rating and a review. They help out so much. And I will see you guys again next week. Or maybe on a pep talk Wednesday. I don't even know when this episode is going live, but I'll see y' all again soon. This is affirmations for Black Girls. If you work as a manufacturing facilities engineer, installing a new piece of equipment can be as complex as the machinery itself. From prep work to alignment and testing, it's your team's job to put it all together.

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[Ty]

With industrial grade products and next day delivery, Granger helps ensure you have everything.

[Tyra B.]

You need close at hand through every.

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Step of the installation.

[Ty]

Call 1-800-granger clickgranger.com or just stop by.

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Granger for the ones who get it done.