All Pro Dad Podcast
Episode: The Dad They Run To, Not From
Date: July 7, 2025
Hosts: Ted Lowe & Bobby Lewis
Episode Overview
In this episode, Ted Lowe and Bobby Lewis explore the challenge and opportunity of being the kind of father that children run to, not from. Using both humor and honesty, the hosts discuss how a dad’s physical presence—often literally being the biggest person in the room—can make a huge emotional impact. They break down practical ways dads can be approachable and safe for their kids by focusing on calmness, affection, safety, and true strength. The episode is rich with stories, advice, and candid moments, guiding dads to build better, stronger bonds with their children.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Intimidating Presence of Dad
- Visualizing “Giant” Dad
- Ted kicks off with a discussion about physical size, comparing the height differences between dads and kids, and how that shapes kids’ perceptions of dad as a "giant" figure—both literally and metaphorically.
- Quote:
"For a little bit of perspective, it would be like your boss being seven four."
— Ted (02:34)
- Impact on Dependency and Control
- Kids depend on dads for everything, making the "giant" an inherently powerful presence whose actions matter even more.
Timestamp: 02:03–03:14
2. How to Be an Approachable Father: Four Pro Dad Traits
A. Be Calm
- Why Calm Matters:
- Reacting with calmness rather than volume or anger teaches kids security and emotional regulation. When dads are the biggest and the loudest, it can be truly frightening to kids.
- Tip:
- Get down on your child’s level, maintain eye contact, and where possible, whisper corrections to save dignity.
- Quote:
“If you combine big and loud, that can be scary.”
— Bobby (04:27) - Modeling Calm:
- Recounting stories where calm gestures minimize fear and maximize listening.
Timestamp: 03:58–05:57
B. Be Affectionate
- Physical Affection as Bond-Building:
- Dads’ hugs, wrestling, bedtime kisses, and long embraces matter, even as kids get older.
- Bobby shares family rituals like “three kisses on the forehead” and how his teenage daughter now expects—and values—long hugs.
- Quote:
“Our kids need to know that we love them. And affection is one way that we can show that.”
— Bobby (09:30) - Generational Impact:
- A comedian’s story illustrates the hurt of not receiving affection, and how this need resonates deeply with listeners/readers.
- Adapting to Changing Needs:
- As daughters grow, affection adjusts, but communication remains essential—ask what feels right.
Timestamp: 05:57–10:27
C. Be Safe
- The Safe Harbor:
- Dads need to be the first call in crisis—a flat tire, accident, or trouble. It’s about responding with calm and perspective, prioritizing the child’s wellbeing over things (like the car).
- Ted’s story: His teenage son crashes a car and is distraught, but Ted’s calm, comforting response eases his son immediately.
- Quote:
“He might as well have been three feet tall... I just grabbed him. He goes, ‘I’m so sorry.’ I said, ‘Listen, buddy, they make these [cars] every day. You’re not going to get one, but they make them every day.’”
— Ted (13:16)
- Everyday Safety Rituals:
- From holding hands in a parking lot to providing comfort after mistakes or pain, safety is both a feeling and a set of actions.
Timestamp: 10:27–15:40
D. Be Strong
- Redefining Strength:
- Strength isn’t just physical—true strength involves emotional steadiness, vulnerability, and being what your child needs in their moment.
- Quote:
“To me, it’s vulnerability and being able to get down and connect with your kids in the way they need you to connect.”
— Bobby (17:36)
- Examples of Strength:
- Helping a child process loss (like a family pet) differently for each child, being present with crying kids, or reassuring a teen that it’s OK to process things in their own way.
- Shielding Kids:
- Taking on "big people problems" so kids don’t have to carry unnecessary burdens.
Timestamp: 15:40–19:57
3. Audience Reflections & Pro Move of the Week
- Self-Examination:
- Both hosts reflect on how these conversations challenge them to be more intentionally calm and strong fathers.
- Quote:
“This is their first time to be human. You’re teaching them how.”
— Ted (20:09)
- Practical Pro Tip:
- Pro Move of the Week:
“Dads this week, look for an opportunity, if you have younger kids, get down on their level; if you have bigger kids, remain calm and be strong for them.”
— Ted (20:24)
- Pro Move of the Week:
Timestamp: 19:57–20:29
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On giant dads:
“You are still in every way a giant to them. Giant in terms of dependency…giant in terms of control.”
— Ted (03:03) -
On affection:
“When your kids don’t get [affection] from you, they’re gonna go get it somewhere else. And you may not like where they get it.”
— Bobby (09:23) -
On responding to accidents:
“He might as well have been three feet tall.”
— Ted, about seeing his son cry at a car accident (13:16) -
On teaching emotional strength:
“Our responses and reactions are not going to dictate theirs; they’re going to feel safer when we’re calm and strong.”
— Ted (16:36) -
On adapting strength:
“You can mold to what your kids need to be, and I think that’s important...It’s making sure we’re loving our kids the way they need to be loved. That’s true strength.”
— Bobby (19:41–19:56)
Episode Flow & Timestamps
- Physical size of dads and its effect (00:21–03:14)
- Four traits of approachable dads: Calm, Affectionate, Safe, Strong (03:14–19:57)
- Pro tip of the week & reflections (19:57–20:29)
- Closing banter and credits (20:30–end)
Takeaway for Dads
Being the “dad they run to” isn’t about having all the answers or being perfect. It's about using your status—big or small—to be present, affectionate, safe, and emotionally strong. Get down on your kids’ level, adapt as they grow, and let them see your strength through your calm, your affection, and your open, safe heart.
For Further Growth
- Challenge yourself to identify one area—calm, affection, safety, or strength—to intentionally practice this week.
- Share the episode with a friend who might benefit from these real, relatable dad insights.