Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

Episode 261: Teen Depression & Suicide in 2026: What’s Different Now? with Jonathan Singer
Release Date: March 3, 2026
Host(s): Dr. Lisa Damour & Reena Ninan
Guest: Dr. Jonathan B. Singer

Overview

This episode tackles the urgent and evolving landscape of teen depression and suicide in 2026. Hosts Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan are joined by Dr. Jonathan B. Singer, a prominent youth suicide prevention expert, to discuss recent changes in prevalence, what drives suicidal thoughts in youth, and how parents can navigate prevention and support in a world transformed by technology, social change, and a new mental health environment. Listener questions guide much of the conversation, providing practical language, advice, and hope.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Changing Trends in Youth Suicide (2022-2026)

[02:30–04:46]

• Context: Suicide rates during and post-pandemic
• Key Insight: Initially, youth suicide rates declined sharply at the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic, contrary to widespread fears of an increase.
  • There was a “bounce back” with rates rising in 2021 and 2022, but in 2023 and (provisionally) 2024, youth suicide deaths have declined again—“over 1 per 100,000” (03:32).
• Quote:

  “The provisional data for 2024 is that the decline continues. Now, these are overall national stats... but overall, youth suicide deaths have decreased in the United States in the last couple of years to the joy of many folks and to the surprise of almost everyone.”
  —Jonathan Singer (04:30)

2. Root Causes and Family Impact

[04:48–08:09]

• Common Assumptions: Many parents believe only catastrophic or extraordinary events lead to suicide.
• Reality: It’s often an “overwhelming sense that who you are is a problem,” such as feeling like a burden due to gender identity, sexual orientation, or unmet expectations.
• High-achieving kids can also be at risk, feeling enormous pressure with “no space to not keep that up.”
• Parental Strategy:

  “Love them as they are.”
  —Lisa Damour (08:01)

3. National vs. Local Statistics—What Should Parents Trust?

[08:09–11:02]

• National trends don’t reflect local reality: a single suicide in a community matters more than any national stat.
• Parents should seek out school or community-specific data for context—some locales have granular dashboards for mental health indicators.
• Advice: Focus on your local data and realities; don’t assume national trends are your community’s trends.

4. Monitoring Technology & Behavioral Warning Signs

[11:02–13:41]

• On Monitoring Digital Communication: Simply tracking texts/social media rarely gives direct answers—kids use coded language (e.g., “unalived” for suicide on TikTok).
• Withdrawal: A sudden drop in social usage for an adolescent could signal concern, not improvement.
• Quote:

  “If they see that they've stopped using [social media]... it could be that they are disconnecting from peers. They are no longer participating in social activities, which for adolescents particularly is developmentally central...”
  —Jonathan Singer (12:57)

5. Rising Hope: College Student Well-being

[13:41–15:51]

• College students are experiencing improved rates of anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation post-pandemic.
• Reasons: Return to in-person life, improved mental health infrastructure, more accessible telehealth, and proactive university support.
• Quote:

  “There’s greater access, there's more understanding of people being able to access help. And so I think all of that is good.”
  —Jonathan Singer (15:48)

6. Teasing Apart Sadness, Depression, and Level of Risk

[15:52–19:06]

• Parental Anxiety: Parents are often “on pins and needles”—any sadness in kids sparks fear of depression or suicide.
• Key Differentiator: Sadness is short-lived, connected to clear events, and responsive to positive experiences; depression is persistent and resistant to cheering up.
• Parental Action: Talk with your child, normalize checking in, and use outside help if needed (e.g., 988, telehealth).
• Vulnerability in expressing parental fear can open up deeper conversation.

7. Responding to Threats or Disclosures of Suicidal Ideation

[19:06–22:18]

• Rule: ALL disclosures or threats should be taken seriously—dig deeper to distinguish intent (“Is that something you’re really thinking about, or just how upset you feel right now?”).
• Watch for other warning signs: withdrawal, poor sleep, irritability, sudden anger, or disconnection from usual activities/social groups.

8. Talking to Children and Teens about Suicide, Attempt, or Loss

[22:28–27:20]

• When a Peer Dies: Acknowledge all grief responses as normal—numbness, anger, crying.
• Caution against risky group behaviors (substance use) during high emotional times.
• Use “car ride” moments for non-pressured conversations.
• With Younger Siblings: Be age-appropriate, honest, and concrete about what’s happening and why family focus has shifted; invite questions and keep the door open.
• Quote:

  “We are now going to bring you into this conversation, and we're going to share that…your older sibling has been having a really hard time…”
  —Jonathan Singer (25:46)

9. Living with Anxiety After a Suicide Attempt

[27:41–30:37]

• Parental anxiety is normal—what’s important is making the environment safe (remove firearms, secure medications, etc.)
• Attachment-based family therapy approaches can help: Openly tell the child that reporting suicidal thoughts to you is always the right thing to do.

10. AI’s New Role in Suicide Prevention

[31:01–34:44]

• Caution: Kids (and adults) use AI chatbots for support, but these are not people—guardrails can fail in crisis contexts.
• Positive Use: Parents can employ AI for role play or to get guidance on how to have difficult conversations—prompting with “Answer like Jonathan Singer” or “as a suicide expert” adds helpful focus.
• Quote:

  “You can use this phrase with any of the large language models: ‘I would like to talk about [this] with an expert in suicide prevention…’”
  —Jonathan Singer (33:26)

11. Sources of Hope in 2026

[34:47–36:38]

• Downward trend in suicide rates and improved well-being among college students offers “some hope.”
• High-quality mental health resources and accurate information—including those delivered by social media or AI (e.g., Lisa’s Rosalie, an AI-powered librarian)—are expanding access for families.
• Quote:

  “As much as social media can be accessible, I actually think that there’s great resources out there…”
  —Jonathan Singer (35:57)

12. Practical Language for Parents: Asking About Suicide

[37:11–37:51]

• Ask Directly:

  “Because you haven’t seemed yourself or you’ve seemed down…have you had any thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life?” —Dr. Lisa Damour (37:11)

• Direct questions do not cause suicidal thoughts, research confirms—but they provide relief and connection to kids who may be struggling.

Notable Quotes

• “Love them as they are.” —Dr. Lisa Damour (08:01)
• “If parents are thinking, ‘I’m going to track their social media use,’ if they see that they've stopped using it…that could be that they are disconnecting from peers.” —Dr. Jonathan Singer (13:35)
• “Check in with your kid and say, ‘Hey, I’m noticing these, and I don’t understand why exactly, but I’m scared.’ And that vulnerability…might actually be the thing that prompts a connecting conversation.” —Dr. Jonathan Singer (18:38)
• “You want to be that direct…if a kid’s thinking about it, they’re really glad you asked.” —Dr. Lisa Damour (37:15)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:30] Suicide trends, pandemic/post-pandemic changes
• [05:06] Common parental misconceptions, root causes
• [11:02] Tracking youth risk via digital behaviors/social media
• [13:41] College students’ resilience and mental health improvements
• [15:52] Differentiating sadness, depression, and risk
• [19:22] Interpreting threats/“jokes” about suicide
• [22:28] Supporting teens after a friend’s suicide
• [25:46] Explaining suicide/self-injury to younger siblings
• [27:41] Family life following a suicide attempt
• [31:01] AI: dangers and support in suicide prevention
• [34:47] Reasons for hope in 2026
• [37:11] Direct language for asking about suicide

Memorable Moments

• Honest discussion of parents’ fears and practical, compassionate responses.
• Reframing technology’s role both as a risk (AI chat gone wrong) and as a force for good (informed AI assistants for parents).
• Tangible hope in national data, changing campus cultures, and new prevention resources.
• Actionable language for hard conversations (“Have you had any thoughts of harming yourself or ending your life?”).

Conclusion

This important, hope-filled episode delivers essential context and practical strategies for parents, educators, and those working with teens. Dr. Singer, Dr. Damour, and Reena Ninan provide clarity, validation, and real-world scripts for the most difficult conversations in parenting—and suggest that even amid modern challenges, evidence-based communication, community focus, and technological innovation offer meaningful pathways to support and healing.