A (0:00)

Hey there and welcome to Authentically adhd. I'm your host, Carmen, and I am so glad that you're here. This is a podcast where we get real about adhd. No filters, no judgment. A safe space to explore and learn and grow. If you're here, it's because you want to take a deep dive into the world of adhd. And trust me, we're going to have a lot of fun doing it. Now, you're probably wondering, why did I start this podcast? Well, in true ADHD fashion, it all started very impulsively. One day I thought I should start a podcast, especially with all this paperwork that I have and all these notes that I have, trying to understand my own adhd. And the next thing I knew, here I am sharing thoughts with you. I don't know, 200, 100 episodes later, I don't know, I lose track of time. I'm time blind. Are you? Anyways, when you have adhd, ideas come fast and sometimes you just gotta roll with them. Honestly, this podcast was born out of my passion for understanding ADHD in a deeper way with the newest research. You see, pills don't teach skills. That's something I've learned over the years. Medication can help, and it's a great tool to use. But true growth, that comes from knowledge, understanding and actionable skills. And so that's why I want to share with you research back, insights, practical tips, and lived experience of someone who's been there. Now, a little bit about me. I'm not just a host of this podcast. I'm also an early childhood special education teacher, which means I've spent years understanding how children learn, grow, and thrive in ways that work for them, especially when they're neurodiverse. And I'm also a certified life and performance coach, guiding people to unlock their full potential in both their personal and professional lives. But here's the thing that makes me a little different. I'm also a late diagnosed adhder. And on top of that, I self identify as being on the autism spectrum. So when I talk about adhd, it's not just from a professional perspective. It's from lived experience. Because I get it. I know what it's like to feel like your brain is running at full speed while everyone else is moving at a different pace. And you have instructions that are in Japanese and upside down and everybody else got them in their own language. Throughout this podcast, I'll share all kinds of insights about navigating life with adhd, from the everyday struggles to the strengths that we can celebrate. We'll talk about everything from time management to relationships to self advocacy and all about how to live authentically in a world that often asks us to be anything but. Whether you have ADHD yourself or you want to understand it better, you are in the right place. So let's get started. Hi, this is a disclaimer that I am a early childhood special education teacher, I am a certified life and performance coach and I am a podcaster. Alright, I am not a medical doctor and none of this information should be used in supplement of a medical professional and or therapy. Foreign. Hey there my friend. And welcome or welcome back to another episode of Authentically adhd where we explore the unique experiences and challenges of living with adhd. And today we're diving into a concept that many of us can relate to energy management and the Spoon theory. Originally coined by Christine Misreno, I always mess up her last name, but she coined it for chronic illness. But the spoon theory offers a powerful metaphor for understanding our daily energy reserves while living with adhd. This is one of my favorite topics because it really makes energy management concrete. Because managing energy sometimes to a person with ADHD sounds super. Like non concrete, it sounds super. What's the word I'm looking for? Like woo. Woo. Like managing your energy is something that you can do like. Like that it's not. But. But it really is. And the spoon theory shows us how to do it. So. So if you've never heard of the spoon theory or don't know really what it is, let's break it down and see why it resonates so deeply with so many of us living with adhd. So like I said before, the spoon theory was created by Christine Miscerandino, who used the metaphor of spoons to explain how people with chronic illness experience daily energy depletion. Essentially, each spoon represents like a unit of energy. When you wake up in the morning, you'll start the day with a certain number of spoons, usually around 10. But it varies by person and by day and about like how many spoons and what size spoons they are, or what each task takes. Like how many spoons does each task take? So every task that you do takes on costs, right? You use one of the spoons, brushing your teeth, one spoon, making a decision, two spoons, even something as seemingly as choosing what to wear, it all may cost a half to a whole spoon. Now, for someone with adhd, this metaphor becomes even more profound because ADHD is marked by executive dysfunction, which means that our brains are constantly working overtime to stay on task, regulate our emotions and process information even when we're doing something just as seemingly simple as choosing what to wear. It's like we're running on a marathon with one leg or walking uphill with a heavy backpack and no one else can see the backpack. Let's take a moment and think about a typical morning. Maybe you wake up and already you feel drained. Your brain is buzzing with a million things to do, and it's hard to even choose what to tackle first. Maybe your first spoon is used just by getting out of bed because the act of shifting from one state sleep to another, being awake already takes a lot of mental effort. Then you're faced with the decision of what to have for breakfast. And suddenly there are a thousand possibilities and each one feels like it requires a huge amount of energy to process. That's your second spoon gone. And it's not just the task of getting food, but the emotional regulation, decision making, and time blindness that go along with it. Now consider a more complex task. Focusing on work. For many with adhd, sitting down to work means fighting against distractions, staying focused, and managing inner restlessness. The effort it takes to stay on track and resist distractions is a huge energy drainage. Each moment of focus and refocus costs another spoon. Here's a metaphor to help with understanding. Imagine you're carrying around a basket of spoons every time you take on a task. It's like picking up your phone to check an email, or organizing your thoughts for a meeting, or even keeping a conversation on track. One spoon slips from the basket and falls onto the ground. But unlike a normal day where you might have a full basket with adhd, the basket is already half empty at the beginning of the day. It's like walking through a crowded marketplace where you're constantly trying to catch the spoons before they drop. It's a struggle because the energy needed to keep the basket from spilling is constantly sapping your strength. The reality of this for many of us with adhd, is that our spoons do not refill at the same rate as someone without adhd. Because the time by the time the afternoon rolls around, right, you might feel completely drained. Not because you have physically demanding day, but because your brain has been working overtime trying to maintain focus, suppress distractions, and regulate your emotional responses. And no one tells you that just staying present and in the moment in the world requires extra energy. So when you're dealing with adhd, it's like your energy reserves become slightly smaller and get depleted faster. So while a neurotypical person or A person who doesn't have ADHD may start the day with a full set of spoons. Someone with ADHD might start the day already at a disadvantage. And here's the kicker. No one refills your spoons at night, and there's no reset button. So by the end of the day, you're often running on empty. And that's where managing your spoons wisely becomes so crucial. We're going to take this a step further and really dive into what it's like to apply the spoon theory to adhd. Imagine waking up each morning with only half the spoons you need for the day. The reality is that most people with ADHD are already starting off behind the starting line. The thing is, the ADHD brain doesn't have the same energy reserves that a person without ADHD does. The minute we wake up, those spoons are already half spent. You. You might wake up tired, feeling like you didn't get a full recharge. And by the time you start tackling daily tasks, you're already in a deficit. Now the challenge isn't just to have fewer spoons. It's that executive function challenges make those spoons vanish faster than you can say coffee. Tasks that seem simple to others, like getting dressed, making decisions, or having a conversation, require so much more cognitive and emotional energy. For someone who with adhd, it's like starting a marathon halfway through the race while everyone else is already fully rested and ready to go. Let's talk about getting ready in the morning. For someone with adhd, getting dressed isn't just about picking out the clothes. It's about making decisions. Do I wear something comfortable or something that looks nice? Do I need to match or not? And then there's the other emotional layer. Am I feeling okay in what I'm wearing, or do I feel like I feel failed already before the day even started? Each of these small decisions requires energy, and those energy reserves, the spoons quickly start to dwindle. You might even feel like you're spending more spoons and more energy avoiding the tasks or deciding on them rather than actually doing them. Each step seems more exhausting than it should be. And then by the time you're ready to leave the house, you realize that you've already used four spoons before you've actually even started your actual workday or responsibilities for the day. And that's a big problem when you only have maybe 10 to start with. Think of the ADHD brain like a car with a gas tank that only fills halfway each night. Every morning, you Start off already with that low fuel light on. Now, most people can drive around all day running errands, making decisions, doing work, and their gas tank only drops a little by little. But for someone with adhd, it's like every decision and every action burns through that fuel faster. And it's not just the tasks that seem hard. It's that your brain is already on empty before you even start. So there's no way to quick refuel. Let's take a look at some of the science behind this and dive into some research that explains why ADHD not only impacts our attention, but also energy regulation. And trust me, it's not all just in your head. It's real and it's a biological challenge. ADHD is commonly associated with dopamine dysregulation. Dopamine is the brain's feel good transmitter. It helps with motivation, focus and energy. For individuals with adhd, dopamine does not work in the right way. Research shows that our brain often has trouble releasing and utilizing dopamine in the correct ways, especially especially during tasks that are uninteresting or repetitive. This means that our brains require more energy to stay focused and motivated. Studies show that ADHD brains have a lower baseline level of dopamine. This means it's harder for us to get started and stay engaged for long periods of time on tasks and even experience the kind of reward driven motivation that keeps us going. The fact that we have to exert extra energy just to stay on track leads to faster depletion of our spoons. Essentially, because of this dopamine dysfunction, everyday tasks demands they are more effortful and we get tired way faster. Take work for example. For some with adhd, sitting down to complete a project is not just about doing the task. See about having the motivation to get yourself started in the first place. The brain needs that dopamine hit to get you in gear. But if it doesn't get it, it feels like you're pushing a boulder uphill that's square shaped, not round. You're putting in double the energy to get the same results as a person who doesn't have adhd. Another real life scenario. Let's say you're having an emotionally charged conversation. You're trying to manage your emotions while staying focused on on what's being said. And your brain is using an enormous amount of energy to regulate both the task, the conversation and your emotional responses. It's not just a normal conversation, it's a battle for focus and emotional control, draining those spoons even faster. Think of dopamine like the fuel in your brain's gas tank. For people with adhd, it's like you're driving with a faulty fuel gauge. It's impossible to tell when you're running low. You might even feel like you're running on fumes long before you realize that your tank is near empty. Tasks that require attention, emotional regulation, or even decision making deplete your energy reserves quickly because your brain needs more fuel to get that same amount of work done. So when we talk about managing our Spoons, it's not just about organizing tasks. It's about understanding how our brains process energy and and how externalized factors like how we're feeling, what we're doing, and even how our dopamine levels are fluctuating can drain our energy even faster. Managing ADHD energy isn't just about doing less. It's about doing what we can with what we've got. And sometimes that means rethinking how we will approach our day entirely. Up next, we're going to talk about actionable tips and coping strategies for this, as always. But first, a word from our sponsors. Hey there. If you're looking for a game changer in managing your adhd, or let me tell you about something that's made a huge impact on my life. Focused, the Adult ADHD Group Coaching Program by Kristin Carter this isn't just another program. It's a community. It's a roadmap. It's a lifeline for adults with ADHD who want to thrive. Inside of Focus. You'll find weekly coaching calls with Kristen packed with actionable insights. A supportive community of adults who get it. They get what it's like to live with adhd. You'll get tools and strategies that actually work for our brains. No fluff, just real results. I've been a part of Focused for over a year and let me tell you, it's where I've learned so much of what I share with you on Authentically adhd. It's been a game changer for me and I think it could be for you too. And here's the best part. If you use my link to join, we both save money. It's a win win. So if you've been looking for the right ADHD ADHD support, this is your sign to check it out. Head to the link in my show notes to learn more and sign up. Let's thrive together with tools and support that we need to succeed. Are you also loving what we're doing unauthentically ADHD but want to take your experience to the next level. Well, I have got something for you. Introducing the Authentically ADHD Patreon. Your VIP pass to the ultimate ADHD support hub. As a Patreon member, you'll unlock exclusive perks like early access to every single episode. Hear it before anyone else does. A treasure trove of resources that I've made. Tools, guides and worksheets to help you thrive in everyday aspects of life. Direct coaching opportunities with me designed to help you harness your ADHD powers. And the cherry on top. An incredible community of like minded individuals who just get it. You're not alone on this journey and together we can be unstoppable. By joining Patreon, you're not just supporting the podcast, you're fueling a movement. Together, we're breaking stigmas, embracing authenticity, and creating a world where ADHD is seen as a strength and not just a struggle. So what are you waiting for? Head over to patreon.com authenticallyadhd and join the family today. Let's keep growing, thriving and showing up authentically together. Hope to see you over there. Back to the show. Hey there my ADHD tribe. I have an offer for you. Do you ever feel like you're constantly juggling but somehow always dropping the ball? You're not alone. We've all been there. I struggle still to manage time, stay organized, and to keep track of the never ending to do list. I'm Carmen and I get it. Trust me. That's why I have created Thriving Authentically with ADHD Executive Functions and Company Strategies. It's a course designed to help you take control of your ADHD brain instead of letting it control you. But here's the kicker. It's not just a course, it's a journey. For only $25, you'll get access to about three hours of exclusive ADHD friendly content that breaks down the executive functions in simple terms and explains why your ADHD brain works in the way that it does and most executive functions. Most importantly, it'll teach you practical research back coping strategies that you can start using today. From working memory struggles to time blindness to emotional regulation, we cover it all. Plus, you'll get a workbook in your email packed with interactive exercises to help you reflect on your own ADHD journey, track your progress and apply what you've learned at your own pace. But that's not all. You also will get to personalized coaching sessions where we can dive into your specific challenges and create strategies that work for you. No more one size fits all solutions. Just real, authentic, tailored support and the Best part? You get all this for just $25. That's less than a cost of a meal out. Plus, with my proven strategies, you can start improving your executive function skills in no time. Imagine finally understanding your ADHD brain and learning how to thrive and not just survive. Don't wait too long. The spots are limited. Sign up today and let's get started on your journey to thriving authentically with adhd. Alright, so now that we've got a solid understanding of how ADHD impacts our energy and how the spoon theory fits into the equation, let's dive into some actionable tips and coping strategies that are scientifically backed to help us conserve our spoons throughout the day. These aren't just things I'm pulling out of thin air. These are strategies that are grounded in research about how ADHD affects our brains and bodies. These are also things that I use and my clients use and are pretty much successful in using as strategies, especially if you tailor it to work for you. So let's get into it first. 1. Prioritize your tasks One of the most effective ways to manage your energy is by prioritizing your tasks. The Eisenhower Matrix is a tool that can help you put break down your to do list into four categories. Urgent and important and important but not urgent and urgent but not important and neither urgent nor important. This Eisenhower Matrix effect, which you can Google Eisenhower matrix because I know that that important urgent type little thing that I did, it even confused me. So seeing it visually is really a lot better. If you just picture four squares, it's basically a tool that can tell you what is important and urgent, what is urgent and not important and then what's important but not urgent and then what's not either important or urgent at all. And it can help you focus on what really needs to be done at that moment and what can wait. For someone with adhd, this is crucial because we can often get overwhelmed by the sheer number of tasks we have and the pressure of everything needing to be done now, because usually prioritization isn't a thing for our brains. So categorizing those tasks and focusing on the urgent and important one first, it reduces the emotional and cognitive load of figuring out where to start. So let's say you're juggling multiple projects, work tasks, home chores, and a personal commitment. Without prioritization, all these tasks can feel like they demand your full attention, simultaneously leading to a massive drain on your spoons. Using the Eisenhower matrix, you can identify the most urgent and important task, maybe a work deadline. I don't know and tackle it first, leaving less urgent tasks like organizing your closet for later. This helps you conserve your spoons for the tasks that actually matter most, and it'll help you prevent that burnout and manage your energy 2. Chunking your tasks Breaking tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks, called chunking is a powerful way to make big projects feel less overwhelming. Research shows that people with ADHD struggle with task initiation and focus, and breaking down tasks into bite sized pieces makes it way easier to get started and maintain focus. Chunking also prevents that all or nothing mentality that often leads to procrastination. By focusing on one small piece at a time, it becomes easier to build momentum and you don't have to worry about the giant mountain of work in front of you. So say you have a massive report due at work. Instead of staring at the screen and thinking this is going to take forever, break it down. Maybe the first chunk is researching the topic and the second is making a draft or an outline or an introduction and the third might be getting the sections out and so on and so forth. This way each step feels doable and you get the satisfaction of completing one small chunk before moving on to the next one. Number three I know you're gonna roll your eyes, but Mindful Breaks let's talk about the power of taking regular mindful breaks. Research has consistently shown that taking brief, frequent breaks improves focus, productivity and overall brain health for people with adhd. This is especially important because our brains tend to burn through energy very quickly, especially when we're hyper focused, leading to mental fatigue and burnout. So instead of pushing through when your brain is fried, take a five to ten minute break. During this time, do something restorative like stretching, listening to music, or simply stepping outside for a breath of stretched air. Stare at the wall, throw your water on your face. I don't know anything that will help you reset and focus and prevent you from burning out early in the day and burning through all of the spoons right away. For example, you're working on a project and you can feel your concentration slide, slipping. Instead of trying to power push through the mental fatigue, take a short break. Step away from your desk, go for a walk, take a quick shower, splash your face with water, or just close your eyes for a few minutes. When you return, you'll likely find that you're able to focus more effectively now that your brain has regained some of the energy it needed to keep going. 4. Sleep hygiene Yes, I used to really not understand what sleep hygiene was, but it's really just about what you do during the day, sleep hygiene and kind of what you do in your nighttime sleep routine to manage sleeping patterns. So having good sleep hygiene, meaning doing those things during the day, like getting some exercise, establishing, getting sunlight, making sure your brain knows when it's daytime versus nighttime. A solid sleep routine is absolutely crucial for managing ADHD symptoms and keeping those spoons in check. Research shows that people with ADHD often have irregular sleep patterns. Ask me how I know. And not only when you have irregular sleep patterns. When you have a lack of sleep, it exacerbates ADHD symptoms, leaving you feeling more drained the next day. Establishing a consistent sleep routine not only helps you feel more rested, but it also supports overall brain health, which is really essential for managing your energy levels, honestly. So try to go to bed and wake up at about the same time every day. Yes, even on the weekends. Avoid caffeine or screen time in about the one hour block before you go to bed to allow your brain to wind down. And good sleep is not just about quantity, it's also about quality. Some adults can totally go with five and a half to six hours of sleep every night if it's a good quality. But say you need more quantity to get the quality sleep, then you may require seven to nine hours of sleep at night. Really finding that out is super important and can be super useful to managing your energy and those spoons. For example, if you're staying up late, binge watching Netflix, or scrolling through social media before bed, it's no surprise that you're waking up feeling like your brain has been working overtime through the night. Aim to make sleep a priority by sticking to a consistent sleep schedule. You'll notice you wake up with more energy, which means you have more spoons to work with throughout the day. Number five, nutrition and exercise. Do not turn this off because the next tip is super important. And I still have like more. I have seven and more only on five. So stop. Do not pause at the word exercise. Okay, we could just change that to movement. You don't have to get scared about exercise. I understand a balanced diet, meaning eating well enough and regular movement or exercise are foundational to maintaining good brain health and energy levels. Literally, you guys. Studies show that exercise is the number one treatment that is natural for adhd because it literally does pretty much the same thing as stimulant medication. Sorry, not sorry, that's what it is. I have several podcasts about it. It's the reason that I became a runner as an adult when. When I was in high school. I literally would walk the mile. And I hated sports and running and exercise. And as I grew older, I learned how much better I feel after a run. Right. I realized how much more focused I am after a walk. And like I've mentioned before, I pair my walks and outdoor time right now with my game, the Pokemon Go game that requires you to walk to play? Pretty much. And that motivates me. Not only does it help me with getting movement into my day, but it turns that movement into something more fun by playing the game, which really helps with if you've ever had that afternoon slump of an after lunch that was mostly carbs or sugar, you know how quickly your energy can swap. But maybe swapping that sugary snack for something like a handful of, I don't know, nuts like almonds or some hard boiled eggs, I don't know. Find something protein full that you like. You'll feel more sustained. Give yourself a 20 minute walk, play a game, do something your brain likes and it can help prevent that post meal, post afternoon energy dip and give your brain the fuel it needs to get through the rest of the day. See, that wasn't so hard. And the next tip is really important because it's stress management number six. Stress management. Managing stress is a huge factor in conserving your energy, especially in those of us who have adhd. Stress activates the body's fight or flight response, which is mentally and physically draining. Most of us already live in hyper or hypo vigilance, so we're like not always in our window of tolerance. So when we are stressed and that activates our fight or flight response, this heightened state of stress can deplete our spoons. Just chew like that. Engaging in mindfulness practices, deep breathing exercises, or even yoga practices can help you activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which calms your body and conserves your energy. Studies show that even just 10 to 15 minutes of mindfulness meditation can significantly reduce stress levels and improve mental clarity. And the studies don't just show this. You can ask me how I know because that's where I started. Just five, 10 minutes, then 10 to 15. Now I can do it for maybe about 20 to 25 minutes. And hey, if yoga is your thing, it can be an excellent way to reduce physical tension while clearing your mind. One of my clients, he uses yoga and he loves it. He actually has an Instagram page that is dedicated to different yoga poses. And I absolutely love the fact that he did that because not only is he using that yoga to help with his ADHD but he's also helping others with yoga poses by starting easy, giving directions right on the picture, and it's really, really awesome. So definitely comment on a post for this episode or comment on this episode on Spotify or just shoot me a quick message if you would like to follow him and get into yoga like he has. And last but not least, number seven Setting Boundaries. Last but certainly not least, setting boundaries is crucial for managing your energy People with ADHD often have a hard time saying no, especially when we're trying to be helpful. But the truth is, taking on too many responsibilities or social obligations can quickly burn through our spoons. Research shows that saying no isn't just a way to protect our time, but it's also a way to protect our mental energy energy. So for example, you've been asked to take on an additional project at work and or you go to an event you don't really want to attend. All right? So instead of automatically saying yes, ask yourself, do I have the energy for this? Is this worth depleting my spoons for the day? Learning to say no or even offering alternative solutions helps you maintain your energy levels without feeling guilty. By implementing these strategies, prioritizing your tasks, chunking, taking mindfulness breaks, improving sleep hygiene, maintaining good nutrition and movement, or exercise, practicing stress management and setting boundaries, you can start conserving your spoons and using them more efficiently. Remember, ADHD isn't just about attention, it's about managing your brain's energy. It's self regulation. So take control, protect your spoons and use them wisely. Understanding the spoon theory gives us a framework to better navigate our ADHD journey. By navigating and managing our energy effectively, we can maximize our productivity and well being. Remember, each side spoon is precious, so use them wisely. Thank you so so much for hanging out with me and tuning into this episode of Authentically adhd. Don't forget that your working memory sucks. So if you enjoyed this, don't forget to subscribe for more insights when I drop an episode on thriving with adhd. So until next time, stay authentic and we will talk soon.