If you’re AuDHD (autism + ADHD), life can feel like a constant contradiction: craving routine but rebelling against it, needing stimulation but getting overwhelmed, wanting connection but burning out socially. In this episode, Carmen breaks down what neurodivergence actually means (not a personality test), explains ADHD vs autism vs AuDHD, and gives practical, nervous-system-friendly strategies to build a life that fits your brain.

Timestamped Chapters (approx)

* 0:00 — Cold open: the AuDHD paradox in one breath

* 1:30 — Neurodivergence: what it is (and what it isn’t) Autistic Self Advocacy Network+1

* 6:00 — ADHD explained: executive function + attention regulation CDC+1

* 9:30 — Brain networks + “default mode interference” (why focus leaks) PMC+1

* 11:30 — Autism explained: social communication + restricted/repetitive patterns CDC+1

* 13:30 — Sensory processing differences + prediction models PMC+2PMC+2

* 15:00 — AuDHD: why it’s missed + DSM-5 history PMC+1

* 18:00 — Co-occurrence and what it means (you’re not “rare” or “weird”) PMC+1

* 23:00 — The AuDHD Paradox Show: real-life examples

* 32:00 — Tools & strategies: rails not cages, rotation menus, sensory-first, scripts

* 39:30 — Closing: your brain is patterned + gentle next steps

Key Takeaways

* Neurodiversity = natural variation in brains; neurodivergent is a nonmedical identity term. Autistic Self Advocacy Network+1

* ADHD centers on executive functioning and attention regulation, not intelligence or effort. CDC+1

* Autism centers on social communication differences + restricted/repetitive patterns, often including sensory differences. CDC+1

* AuDHD can look contradictory because traits can mask each other; dual diagnosis became formally allowable in DSM-5. PMC+1

* Sustainable support = “rails not cages,” rotation menus, sensory regulation, and externalizing executive function.

Resources Mentioned

* CDC: ADHD diagnosis overview CDC

* CDC: ASD clinical diagnostic criteria overview CDC

* ASAN neurodiversity explanation Autistic Self Advocacy Network

* AuDHD comorbidity review (open access) PMC

Predictive processing + prediction differences in autism (review/empirical)PMC+1

SCRIPT:

Hey there! Welcome or welcome back to another episode of authentically ADHD. I am not going to lie, this year has been hard and im so glad if you have stuck along with me, because the rest of the school year is going to be even busier. So thank you for your patience, and grace as I work through this year and let out episodes when I can. I had some inspo for this one because of the new year coming up, and ive talked about this before but not so much in depth. As I go through this episode, i want to share that ive recently self diagnosed myself as AuDHD, a person who has both ADHD and Autism. What does that mean? Well, lets talk about it!

Okay, quick check-in: have you ever felt like your brain is two different people sharing one body— one who’s like, “Please, for the love of God, routine. Predictability. Same mug. Same route. Same show on repeat.” and the other who’s like, “If I do the same thing twice I will evaporate into dust like a vampire in daylight.”

If yes… hi. Welcome. You’re in the right place.

Today’s episode is called: “Your Brain Isn’t Broken — It’s Patterned.” Because I need you to hear this like it’s a bass line in your chest:

Your brain is not morally failing. Your brain is not lazy. Your brain is not “too much.”

This Substack is reader-supported. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Your brain is patterned. And if you’re AuDHD—autism + ADHD—your pattern can feel like a paradox factory that runs 24/7 with no off switch and a slightly rude customer service department.

So… let’s talk about what neurodivergence actually is, how ADHD and autism overlap, where they differ, and why AuDHD can feel like living inside a contradiction—and then I’m gonna give you real strategies that don’t feel like being yelled at by a productivity guru who thinks “just try harder” is a nervous system plan.

[tiny pause]Are you ready? Let’s get started.

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Okay, tiny intermission—because if this podcast is helping your brain feel a little more understood, I want you to know there’s a whole extra layer of support waiting for you on my Substack.

That’s where I publish Authentically ADHD, and you can usually get the podcast there first—but it’s not just a podcast drop. I’ve started writing blogs there too, which means you get deeper dives, the “ohhh THAT’S what’s happening in my brain” explanations, plus practical tools you can actually use when your executive function is doing that thing where it simply… leaves the chat.

And here’s why I’m obsessed with it: Substack is neurodivergent-friendly by design. You can read posts when you want to skim, you can listen when reading is too much, and I include graphics most of the time because we deserve information in formats that don’t require suffering.

So here’s your invitation: come subscribe on Substack. It’s free to join, and if you decide to become a paid member, you’ll get even more—bonus resources, extra content, and additional supports I’m building specifically for AuDHD/ADHD brains. Subscribe free… or go paid if you want the “director’s cut” plus the toolbox. Either way, I’m really glad you’re here.

Neurodivergence: What it is

So lets talk about neurodivergence & how it is not a personality test. It’s not “Which quirky brain are you?” It’s not “I’m such an Aquarius so obviously I can’t do laundry.”And I say that as a person who loves a good identity moment.

Neurodiversity is the idea that human brains vary—like biodiversity, but for minds. There isn’t one “correct” way a brain must work to be worthy. Neurodivergent is a non-medical term people use when their brain develops or functions differently from what society calls “typical.”

Now—this matters— Saying “it’s a difference” does not erase disability. Some people are deeply disabled by ADHD or autism. Some need significant supports. Some don’t. Many fluctuate across seasons of life. But the point is: difference isn’t the same thing as defect.

A patterned brain can be brilliant and still struggle. Because a lot of suffering isn’t just “the brain,” it’s the brain + the environment.

If the world is built for one nervous system style, and you’re running a different operating system, you’re going to feel like you’re constantly doing life on hard mode.

[pause]And if you’ve spent your whole life trying to “fix” yourself into the version of you that makes other people comfortable— I just want to say: I see you. That’s exhausting. That’s not personal weakness. That’s chronic mismatch.

6:00–15:00 — ADHD vs Autism: Overlap and differences (clear, non-weird)

Let’s do ADHD vs autism without turning it into a simplistic “either/or” checklist, because real humans are not BuzzFeed quizzes.

ADHD (core pattern)

ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition where the core struggles involve attention regulation, impulsivity, and executive functioning—planning, starting, stopping, shifting, organizing, time sense, working memory… the invisible stuff that makes life run. Important: ADHD is not “can’t pay attent...