Father-in-Law Is in LOVE With an Only Fans Model #153

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast Episode #153: "Father-in-Law Is in LOVE With an Only Fans Model" Release Date: May 29, 2025

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Introduction

In Episode #153 of the Bellied Up podcast, hosts Charlie Barrons and Miles Berens dive into a whirlwind of humorous anecdotes, caller stories, and candid conversations. Recorded live at Sweet Shots in Fargo, the evening kicks off with the duo's light-hearted banter before transitioning into engaging listener interactions that range from travel mishaps to unexpected jailhouse tales.

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Travel Turmoil: Charlie's Expired Passport Fiasco

The episode begins with Charlie sharing his harrowing experience of nearly missing a flight due to an expired passport.

Key Points:

• Early Morning Panic: Charlie woke up at 5:15 AM for his flight, only to realize he might have forgotten his wallet and passport. [02:09]
• TSA Encounter: Despite the passport being expired as of April 25, 2025, Charlie managed to pass through TSA without any issues, leaving him both relieved and bewildered. [04:34]
• Reflections on Oversight: He humorously contemplates his luck and the potential consequences of such an oversight. [05:09]

Notable Quote:

Charlie Barrons [02:57]: "It's so crazy that that thought crossed my mind, happened to be true. I happened to not do anything about it."

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Caller Spotlight: Michael's Racetrack and Redemption Story

Michael, a caller from a racetrack job, shares his journey from running wreckers to serving time in prison due to a bar fight.

Key Points:

• Job Overview: Michael explains his role managing wreckers and rollbacks at a racetrack, highlighting the monotony and unexpected camaraderie of the job. [09:27]
• Personality and Lifestyle: The hosts joke about Michael's laid-back attire and potential for a unique brand persona. [12:44]
• Bar Brawl Backstory: Michael recounts an altercation during a bachelor party in Port Clinton, Ohio, which led to him breaking someone's jaw and spending a year and a half in prison. [20:06]
• Prison Insights: Contrary to his fears, Michael describes prison life as less hostile than anticipated, focusing on reading and weight loss. [26:36]

Notable Quotes:

Michael [21:07]: "I shattered his jaw into a couple pieces."

Charlie Barrons [29:38]: "That's a good lesson all the way around. And you can even take out the in high school. Don't be like Miles."

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Safety on the Roads: Russell Discusses Midwestern Driving Hazards

Russell joins the conversation to shed light on the prevalence of road injuries in Midwestern states, attributing high accident rates to two-lane highways and heavy truck traffic.

Key Points:

• High-Risk Areas: Emphasizes that states with extensive rural roads, such as Wisconsin and North Dakota, experience more traffic accidents. [39:46]
• Truck-Related Incidents: Highlights the dangers posed by milk trucks and other heavy vehicles in these regions. [40:45]
• Public Sharing of Experiences: Miles relates Russell's insights to personal high school driving escapades, underscoring the episode's relatable safety message. [41:13]

Notable Quote:

Russell [39:45]: "Anytime you get out of basically Milwaukee, you hit those. And so I'd say Wisconsin, we see a lot of, unfortunately, a lot of bad injuries because of the two lane 55 mile an hour roads."

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Scammed: Neil's Father-in-Law and the OnlyFans Conundrum

Neil introduces a pressing family issue involving his soon-to-be father-in-law falling victim to an OnlyFans scam, prompting a deep dive into the dangers of online impersonation.

Key Points:

• Initial Suspicion: Neil and his fiancé discover suspicious behavior when Neil’s father-in-law starts messaging an OnlyFans model he believes is in love with him. [43:03]
• Verification Efforts: A test reveals discrepancies, suggesting the OnlyFans persona is a scammer, potentially based in India. [46:40]
• Impact on Family: The scam has strained relationships, leading to therapy sessions and uncertainty about the father-in-law's state of mind. [49:25]
• Hosts' Insights: Charlie discusses the rise of impersonation scams, urging listeners to stay vigilant and report fraudulent activities. [58:25]

Notable Quotes:

Neil [43:35]: "It's literally like you would walk out of your house, warehouse looking deal, and it's right there."

Charlie Barrons [48:58]: "It sounds like your father in law got scammed."

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Voicemail Feature: Blake’s Musical Greetings

The episode features a charming voicemail from Blake in Eau Claire, Wisconsin, adding a melodic twist to the show's dynamic.

Key Points:

• Introducing Blake: He greets Charlie and Miles with a mandolin tune and playful warnings about deer. [59:02]
• Hosts' Reaction: Charlie and Miles express intrigue and amusement, considering incorporating Blake's talents into future episodes. [60:00]

Notable Quote:

Blake [59:34]: "I'm sitting here on the porch rubbing my mandolin next to my dog Berkey... Hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye now."

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Closing Thoughts and PSAs

As the episode wraps up, Charlie and Miles offer listeners practical advice drawn from their conversations:

• Avoiding Unnecessary Fights: Emphasizing the importance of de-escalation to prevent severe consequences like legal troubles. [37:06]
• Staying Safe Online: Highlighting the prevalence of online scams and the need for caution when interacting with strangers on platforms like OnlyFans. [58:25]

Final Notable Quote:

Miles [36:32]: "It's always also a guy in his scenario, he never. They never say I just broke his jaw. They always say that they shattered it."

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Conclusion

Episode #153 of the Bellied Up podcast is a rollercoaster of laughter, suspense, and valuable life lessons. From Charlie's near-miss with an expired passport to Michael's transformative journey from wrecking at a racetrack to navigating the constraints of prison life, the episode offers a blend of humor and heartfelt narratives. The discussions with Russell and Neil further enrich the conversation, addressing real-world issues like road safety and online scams. Wrapped up with a delightful voicemail from Blake, this episode underscores the podcast's unique blend of comedy and authenticity, making it a memorable listen for both regulars and newcomers alike.

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Remember: Always double-check your travel documents and stay informed about online safety to avoid situations like those discussed today!

Transcript

[Charlie Barrons]

Folks, if you're looking to come see bellied up live July 8th at Zany's in Chicago, go to charliebarrons.com right now, click on the tour deal, and there it'll be. Buy your ticket, buy one for your friend, and we'll see you soon.

[Miles]

See you in Chicago.

[Charlie Barrons]

Well, folks, here we are, another episode of the Bellied up podcast. I'm Charlie Barrons, here with my good buddy Charlie.

[Miles]

You look good today, man.

[Charlie Barrons]

Well, thanks, Miles.

[Miles]

You look good.

[Charlie Barrons]

You're looking good. You're looking chipper, Miles. My pleasure.

[Miles]

How can I not be chipper when I'm in proximity to swing golf clubs, Charlie?

[Charlie Barrons]

I don't know. Here we are, Miles. Here we are.

[Miles]

We are at Sweet Shots in Fargo. Sweet Shots Bellied up to the bar. We actually met some high school kids on the way in here.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Doesn't sound good coming out of your mouth, Miles.

[Miles]

Well, no, they were coming to golf, and they said that they're. They're doing Senior Skip Day.

[Charlie Barrons]

Senior Skip Day? Did you ever do a Senior Skip Day?

[Miles]

I don't remember.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Feel like maybe. Yeah, I feel like it was, like, organized by the school, so. It wasn't even really Skip Day.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, I mean, yeah, I did see a whole herd of them walking in here. I said, that looks like a field trip, but those kids look too old for field trips. I wasn't sure. Fraternity party. It's right before. There they are, right out there. Some nice swings I've seen so far.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Some of these kids have. Looks like they belong to a country club or something. That guy, not so much. He just shanked.

[Miles]

You were telling me that you almost didn't make it here today.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, Miles, it was rough, man. So listen, I'll tell you this. So this morning, 5:30am Right? Well, 5:00am 5:15, I wake up because I'm flying here to see you, and I'm sitting on the. On Throne. The hopper, as they call it out on the East Coast. You know they call throne a hopper.

[Miles]

I did not know that.

[Charlie Barrons]

I was sitting down, I was peeing, and.

[Miles]

Just.

[Charlie Barrons]

Just in case I was prepared.

[Miles]

You do live alone, so, like, you're one.

[Charlie Barrons]

Exactly.

[Miles]

So it's less splashback.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yes.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. You understand? You understand. So I'm thinking, a mind goes through my. A thought goes through my mind.

[Miles]

Your mind goes through a thought or.

[Charlie Barrons]

My mind goes through a thought. One of the two. Either way, they connected. And I was like, geez, I don't know where my wallet is. I was like, no, it's fine. I'll just use my passport. And then I thought, I wonder if that's expired. Turns out I forgot to check, so I went to the airport. And then I'm like, okay, where's my wallet? Oh, I'd forgot my wallet. And I was like, oh, where's my passport? Oh, I forgot to check. And then I look at it right outside the TSA line, and lo and behold, it expired. April 25, 2025. Can you believe that?

[Miles]

And as of recording this, this is what, May 7th?

[Charlie Barrons]

May 7th, 2020. So I'm like, I mean, it's so crazy that that thought crossed my mind. I haven't thought about renewing my passport.

[Miles]

Ever in, like, 10 years.

[Charlie Barrons]

10 years. Yeah. Literally haven't thought about it. And now, lo and behold, I think about it, and I just think that that's crazy that that thought crossed my mind, happened to be true. I happened to not do anything about it. So, anyways, I'm getting to my point, Miles, telling the story here. I'm building up the suspense.

[Miles]

That's the. You. You. Yep. Go ahead.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, thank you, Jared.

[Miles]

Jared is like our parent.

[Charlie Barrons]

He is. You know, I did.

[Miles]

Almost to the edge of the table.

[Charlie Barrons]

Hey, honey, watch your beer. Oh, yeah, there's another beer. So, yeah, we goblin. So, Miles, I'm freaking out now. I get up to the TSA stand and I'm like, I gotta play cool. So I get up there, I hand them my id. You know, I. I'm.

[Miles]

Your passport.

[Charlie Barrons]

My passport. It's an idea.

[Miles]

No, I know. I just. Thanks for the clarifying that. You don't have your wallet.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. I give them my passport, and I try to play it cool, you know? So I say, hey, nice shirt. You know, this dude looked at me like I had cocaine in all of my pockets. And I had cargo shorts, cargo pants on. Miles, he let me through. He didn't bat an eye. He didn't say anything. Nothing. I just got through. I was already ready to call you. I was acting nervous. Everything. I don't know how it happened. I got through TSA with an expired passport today, and today is the day that they were starting the real ID thing.

[Miles]

And you don't have a real id, either?

[Charlie Barrons]

No, I. A passport is a real id, but this is an expired real id, which I think now makes it federally a fake id. So. Isn't that amazing?

[Miles]

That is amazing.

[Charlie Barrons]

Now, it makes me think two things from here. One, I'm very lucky. Or two, you know how you're staying in front of the camera These days, I think they have biometrics, and I think this whole.

[Miles]

They already know if you're legit or not.

[Charlie Barrons]

They already know.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

So now the question is, because I got to fly back, do I have my wallet overnighted here, or do I just roll the dice again at the Fargo Airport?

[Miles]

Well, so, Anna, this happened to Ann, actually, she forgot her ID and passport.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, damn. She had nothing.

[Miles]

But she had her wallet. She just didn't have her id. I don't know why, but, like, she was able to, like, show him a bunch of credit cards with her name on it and stuff, and she was able to get.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, so they. Yeah, so they can do it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, so it's not that big of a deal.

[Miles]

Yeah. Like, if you have a bunch of credit cards and it's the same name that's on there, like, they. I don't know. That happened to us at the far airport.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, okay.

[Miles]

I think it'd be.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right, so this story didn't have as high a stakes as I thought it.

[Miles]

Yeah, but you think they would have at least said something like, I could imagine. Be like, hey, you know this is expired, right? Like, yeah, I know. I just. I didn't realize it. And then he'd be like, well, let it slide this time.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, I didn't say anything. I didn't think you could even get away with that. I guess I just watched too many movies.

[Miles]

Yeah. It's like, I liked. I think about sometimes the fact that these. You know when you were working at Auntie Ann's.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Pretzel shop. Did you care about that job?

[Charlie Barrons]

No.

[Miles]

There's probably some TSA agents that don't give a. About their job either.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh. Like, all of them.

[Miles]

Right. So if he makes a whole deal about your passport being expired for, like, 15 days or whatever the math is.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

He's like, this is going to just make my day suck.

[Charlie Barrons]

But I thought it was, like a. I thought it was a thing. You know, how they scan them. I thought it was like, you know, the robot agent won't let you through. Like, sorry, man, I can't. It's against federal law.

[Miles]

I think they just, like, do that so they have a record that you're there.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, okay.

[Miles]

I think they just scan it. I don't know. All right, well, I think.

[Charlie Barrons]

You think, but you think you got a good story to tell a guy turns out to be a nothing.

[Miles]

Well, yeah. I don't know. I. I would be freaking out as well.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That's like, my fear. I saw Tick Tock is people, like, when you're flying abroad.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

Like, you're like, check to see if you have a passport. And he, like, goes, I guess, and puts his passport in his backpack. And then he just sits there and then just opens it. Looks. Make sure he does it again. He does it like 10 times. I am. I've been that guy.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Like, my big fear is to be like, lose my passport in a foreign country and then just like, not be able to get back.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

United States.

[Charlie Barrons]

No. Because you kind of do have that fear of, like, you lose your passport out there. You know, it's kind of like Will Smith. When he puts his hand on the big orb and Men in Black, like, removes his fingerprints. He just does not exist.

[Miles]

I don't exist anymore.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I'm going to end up, you know, begging on the side of the street here in Jamaica, you know?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Yeah. Just you and. Yeah.

[Miles]

I'm going to be slinging weed in Jamaica for the rest of my life.

[Charlie Barrons]

I don't think anyone's going to be buying weed from you in Jamaica.

[Miles]

I'm trustworthy.

[Charlie Barrons]

We're in Jamaica, and we're going to buy weed from you. Yeah. This guy knows where the good weeds.

[Miles]

Yeah. I'm not even going to have a job then. I can't even get a job.

[Charlie Barrons]

You could sweep floors, Miles.

[Miles]

That's true.

[Charlie Barrons]

You sweep floors for the weed dealer and then sell the shake to tourists. Just American tourists that are afraid of anyone.

[Miles]

Yeah. You lose your passport in U.S. you're like, I'm chilling.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. I just got to go back to Walgreens.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

I don't do to. I. I don't even know what is involved with me getting a new passport.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Back when that happened, I was making an appointment now. That's it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Do you think I can get the TSA pre redone at the same time? Because I haven't renewed that in a while, and that's got to be close to up. And if I lose that, if I lose my tsa, I will lose my soul.

[Miles]

Oh. And if I have to. And you'll just will miss everything if I have to wait in the regular line at the airport. Charlie, you're not arriving early.

[Charlie Barrons]

Miles, I showed up 22 minutes before my flight this morning. Like, they have been boarding for five minutes. As I was terrified this guy was going to hold me up for not having my I.D. i always barely make.

[Miles]

Thank God. At the Milwaukee airport, they have the recombobulation area. You need to recombobulate A little bit.

[Charlie Barrons]

I did, but I didn't have time.

[Miles]

So you're still discombobulated.

[Charlie Barrons]

I'm still discombobulated.

[Miles]

Here. And we'll take some callers. How about that?

[Charlie Barrons]

That sounds nice. I'd like that.

[Miles]

Michael, you got Miles and Charlie from the Bellied up podcast.

[Michael]

Holy shit. What's up, fellas?

[Miles]

Not much. What's up with you?

[Michael]

Oh, you know, I'm just taking off at work.

[Charlie Barrons]

You're taking off at work? Good for you.

[Miles]

Well, and speaking of guys, Michael works at a racetrack. It sounds like he's a wrecker or a bulldozer or something like that. Michael, what do you do at the racetrac?

[Michael]

I run a wrecker and a rollback.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Michael]

95% of the time, I'm just sitting there listening to your guys podcast or flipping through TikTok.

[Charlie Barrons]

That makes us all feel better about the safety over there. Wait, Michael, what's. We gotta back up the. The record here for a second and explain exactly what those machines are for those not familiar with the process.

[Michael]

A wrecker is just a short, little stubby truck, and it's got a big extension arm on it. And say someone puts their front end into a wall, we go up and we have this thing called a spreader bar. We just back up to it, hook it up by the wheels, pick it up, and take them on back to their. Back to their garage. And that's pretty much our day.

[Charlie Barrons]

This is great, ma' am. You're like. You're like a character in like the next Mad Max, I feel.

[Miles]

Or he's just. He's just mater from cars as well. That's true.

[Charlie Barrons]

That's a better reference right there.

[Michael]

I like that one. Are you guys familiar with Mid Ohio at all? Do you guys get into racing or.

[Miles]

I. I know a very novice amount about racing.

[Michael]

You guys familiar with Indy car?

[Miles]

Yep.

[Michael]

Yeah, so we get IndyCar out here every 4th of July. And that's just. It's. It's the tits, man. I love it. It's just titties.

[Miles]

So you're a wrecker. So did you. How do you get this job? Did you start as someone who was doing that for the public sector, and then you transition into the private sector? Or how does that work?

[Michael]

So now I. I don't want to deal with people. So I've never done, you know, tow trucking for the public, but I started working at the track in 2013 for the security department, and then I got tired of dealing with all the shenanigans of people and all the bullshit they bring with. So I was like, you know what, I'm just gonna switch over where I only have to deal with one person and that's the driver after they have a bad day. So I've been running record rollback for oh, three years now. It was the best, best move I've ever done.

[Charlie Barrons]

So you're kind of like, you're like mostly spend most of your day like a pitcher in the bullpen, you know, like just sitting there, just biting your time, you know, scrolling tick tock, walking around, probably chewing something that's going to give you some kind of something in a few years. But you know, and then when your time comes, like, what's your rollout song? Do they play a song for you when you come out? Little danger zone, you know, like, what is it?

[Michael]

You know, if, if I had a roll out song, it would probably be oh, little three six Mafia, you know, popping my collar. You know that ever since I can remember, you know, I just go out there and we're the rock stars of the racetrack. So these people got to know that when they get picked up by us, they're in good hands. We're gonna make sure they get to where they go and they're with, they're with the top of the top.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I imagine Charlie, he's, he's currently just wearing overalls with no T shirt on underneath, I bet with one of the straps just hanging off.

[Michael]

And I'm telling you guys, you couldn't be more wrong if you tried.

[Miles]

Oh really?

[Charlie Barrons]

What are you wearing?

[Michael]

Well, right now we're just. Well, it's lunchtime, so I went and got pizza and a pack of smoke.

[Miles]

But I was gonna say you probably had a cigarette hanging out of your mouth. So I got part of it right.

[Michael]

Oh yeah, you did. But right now it's just kind of a chill day. We're washing wax and we're about to do the old oil on it. But I'm just in my shitty old boots and some shitty jeans and my work shirt.

[Charlie Barrons]

So it's button up, work shirt.

[Michael]

We're not that fancy.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay. All right. So we weren't too far off.

[Michael]

No, you weren't too far off. We only get real fancy when like we had NASCAR come through about two years ago and they wanted us to wear a little pullover, you know, little polo shirt.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh yeah, dress it up.

[Michael]

Yeah, they wanted us to look good even though we have a little fire coat over it. So you're not going to see the nice little polo we are wearing at all. You're just going to see our boots, our black. Our black pants we wear and then the fire coat.

[Miles]

I think you got to start building yourself a brand at the track. I think you need to adopt the overalls, no shirt. I think you need a coming out song.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I think you need to, as you're rolling up to the truck, have an American FL out the window, you know, roll some coal and make it kind of like you've seen the Savannah Bananas.

[Charlie Barrons]

Charlie Bananas.

[Miles]

Right. So it's baseball, but it's about all the other stuff. This racetrack needs to make everyone that works there a character. And when it's your go time, you're entertaining the crowd.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Because otherwise it's just wasted time for the crowd like this. You guys could be like the rodeo clowns. They didn't used to dress as clowns. They used to just be guys that would get their ass kicked by bulls. But then at one point they're like, hey, let's be clowns. And then people loved it. It just adds, you know, value per second to the experience. This is how you got pitch it to your boss. Because as soon as you do, as soon as you become that guy. I mean, are you married?

[Michael]

I am, but we are legally separated.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Miles]

Well, you then.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, this is. This is. You're. You're not going to be upset about that anymore. Because, my Lord, look at. Look at what's going to happen. What's your official title right now?

[Michael]

You mean like for the job or.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, what? Well, or what.

[Miles]

I used to go by Mr. Yeah, I don't. I don't. I'm not MD yet. Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

What'S. What's your job position? What does it say on your. Your LinkedIn?

[Michael]

Oh, I don't have a LinkedIn. I'm not that. I'm not that bougie.

[Charlie Barrons]

I know. I was saying that I don't have one either, so don't worry.

[Michael]

Mine just says Mike Finnerty Stacy 2025. That's what my little employee card says.

[Charlie Barrons]

Just a safety.

[Michael]

Yep, just says safety. I need to go down to the office and have them put in their record rollback extraordinaire.

[Miles]

That's what I' about now he's thinking.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, the record rollback.

[Michael]

Yeah, man. Wait, hold on. Jordan, go back to work now. Go back to work now. Down there. Ah, damn it, boys. I gotta go back to work, but I'm not getting off this phone call. That can wait.

[Miles]

Are you hopping in the truck right now?

[Michael]

No, I'm in. I'm in my old Buick because I just got back from getting pizza.

[Miles]

I like that you drive a Buick.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Michael]

Oh, dude, I'm telling you what, I bought this Buick for my grandma and she passed away and she's a beaut.

[Miles]

So your grandma died and she still made you pay for the.

[Charlie Barrons]

He paid the estate.

[Michael]

Yeah, I paid the estate.

[Miles]

That's still.

[Charlie Barrons]

His dad made him.

[Miles]

That still made him do it.

[Neil]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

You lose your grandma and have to pay for her Buick. God.

[Michael]

I mean, it was worth it though. It's an 07 Lucerne. And when I got it, it only had 60 grand or 60,000 miles on it, and I only paid 2 grand for it. So I won that up.

[Miles]

Okay. All right.

[Charlie Barrons]

That's a nice ride. That's a nice ride. You got a sweetheart deal on it.

[Miles]

All right. In your grandmother's will, she left you the Buick that you can have for $2,000.

[Michael]

Yeah, I had to pay for it, but you know, I got it.

[Charlie Barrons]

She left you opportunity to purchase Buick after your cousins got the offer ticket.

[Miles]

To the auction with your. With your cousins?

[Michael]

Yeah. I'm telling you, my cousins were trying to snake it from me. Like they didn't already have good cars. I was like, you think you're gonna snake this one from me? You got another thing coming. I'm going to the bank.

[Miles]

So you guys are a strictly Buick family, it sounds like.

[Michael]

Well, you know, we get good deals because my uncle works at a Buick GMC dealership. So, you know.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Michael]

Got to take on the family deals as you can get them.

[Charlie Barrons]

You absolutely.

[Michael]

And I mean, look at this, guys. Before I had the Buick, I had a. A total shit box of a Grand Prix. That sounded like just absolute hell.

[Charlie Barrons]

This surprises me.

[Michael]

Really?

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, no.

[Michael]

I'm shit box king, buddy. I love shit.

[Charlie Barrons]

I believe it. Well, I believe it. Have you. You've all. You've exclusively owned shit boxes before this beautiful Buick.

[Michael]

I'm telling you, I've had three second gen RAM 1500s and all the transmissions go out on them, but I always fix them. I love them trucks.

[Charlie Barrons]

Good for you.

[Miles]

You also. Have you ever spent any time at a demolition derby? You seem like a demo derby guy.

[Michael]

You know, I've been there, but I've never participated.

[Miles]

Something tells me, I think you'd love it.

[Michael]

I probably would. And I, you know, I'm sure the soon to be ex wife wouldn't mind if I took the old Grand Prix out there and just smashed it because it already sounds like hell about 3/4 of the windows, don't Go down. It's rusted. It's got a couple flat tires. It's, you know.

[Charlie Barrons]

How much role did the cars have in the divorce?

[Michael]

Well, they were going to have a big role because I was going to be without the Buick, but then she went and got herself a Jeep, and so I just got the Buick, which was cool.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay.

[Michael]

I just thought I was going to be stuck. Oh, no, no, no. Because the cars weren't the cause of the divorce. I was the cause of the divorce.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, what'd you do?

[Miles]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Michael]

Oh, you know, I'm just an.

[Charlie Barrons]

Well, you're just an. That tells us. Tells us nothing.

[Michael]

It tells you nothing. Well, I'll put it this way, buddy. I had to go sit down and do a little bit of some prison time. So, you know, there's always.

[Charlie Barrons]

Ah, got it. See this? What happens, Miles, when you go prying, and you shouldn't be doing that.

[Miles]

Why?

[Charlie Barrons]

Start getting too much of the story? What'd you go to prison for?

[Michael]

I. Well, you know, just a little bit of a bar fight, and I might have broke the guy's jaw in some places. Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Wow. You broke a guy's jaw at the bar?

[Michael]

I did.

[Miles]

Well, we.

[Michael]

We were out for my buddy's bachelor party, and we were up in the tourist town, and we went to this little local bar there, and they were getting mouthy, and I said, you know what? You're invited for Achille outside, bud, if you want your ass kicked. But if not, just sit down and drink your beer.

[Charlie Barrons]

Way to de. Escalate that situation.

[Miles]

Ultimatums are always good, you know?

[Michael]

Yeah, I mean, I gave him a choice. It was either sit down and enjoy your beer or get your ass kicked in front of your friend.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, the judge didn't think that was a good choice to give him either.

[Michael]

Oh, I know. Oh, no. He looked at me like I was the scum of the earth. I come up. He said to me, you come up in my town as a tourist and you're starting problems. I was like, I didn't start the problems. He started it with me. I just finished it.

[Miles]

Yeah, what actually happened? What was he mad about?

[Michael]

And I started a fight. And then the guy was. You know, he was. Went to the hospital, and I was being a little bit mouthy. I'm like, well, it's not my fault he was mouthy. And the judge, he didn't like that so much.

[Miles]

I mean, what started the initial. The initial spat?

[Michael]

Oh, well, you know, we. Me and my buddies, we come in there, we're Just. We're just trying to have a good time, drink some beers, you know, smoke a little bit of weed. Just chill. We're, you know, we're up there, we're having a good time. And as soon as we walk in, the bartender goes, oh, it's another bachelor party. I'm like, this fucking guy.

[Charlie Barrons]

What town? What town? Austin?

[Michael]

No. You ever heard of Port Clinton, Ohio?

[Miles]

No.

[Charlie Barrons]

No, but. But that's like the bachelor party mecca of Ohio.

[Miles]

Is that. Is that Nashville for bachelor parties? Like Nashville is to bachelorette parties?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, that's what I'm getting. Is it.

[Michael]

I don't think.

[Charlie Barrons]

Is it on the lake somewhere? Is it, like an up.

[Michael]

No, I got one. It's on. No, you can keep that. It's on Lake Erie. Like, you pretty much walk around town, and you're right on Lake Erie.

[Charlie Barrons]

I get it. I get it. So.

[Miles]

So the guy said, another bachelor party. And you said, I'm gonna beat this guy's ass.

[Michael]

Well, no, no, no, no. It didn't happen exactly like that. Let me. Let me back up a little bit. So the bartender says, oh, no, it's another bachelor party. And I just kind of brushed that off. And then his buddy, sitting in the corner, we're like, where are you guys from? I was like, well, we're from Mansfield. What's the deal, buddy? And he was like, this is our bar. You don't belong here. I'm like. I was like, that's funny. I didn't see a private bar, only on the door before I walked in. So what's the deal? And he was like, this is our bar. We don't like you locals. I'm like, I don't give a. I'm not here to talk to you. I'm here to drink some beers, have some shots of whiskey, and go on my merry way without you guys making a buck. And he didn't like the way I was talking to him, so, you know, can't imagine that. You know, probably not. I was being a mouthy asshole, which, I mean, but this situation, like, why are you starting problems with us? We just come in here. We were just trying to drink beers, dude, what's the deal?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, I mean, your defense. You were hammered, you know.

[Michael]

Yeah. That's fair.

[Miles]

I mean, there's just no surprise that whiskey was involved. Yeah, he's doing some shots of whiskey. Yeah, of course.

[Michael]

Oh, yeah. I tell you. So my buddy gave me a right. Go ahead. Go ahead.

[Miles]

I was gonna say, did it ever occur to you and the fellas to just Hit up a different bar.

[Michael]

Yeah, that was the second bar we went to. The first one was cool, and the second one was Power Starter. Not my one. Buddy's like, maybe we should leave. I'm like, yeah, it's probably a good idea. So I cash out, and we're getting to leave, and the guy turns around and he's like, yeah, you better leave. I'm like, oh, no, now we can't leave. Now we can't leave.

[Charlie Barrons]

Just call me chicken.

[Michael]

Pretty much. And I. I already had the whiskey in me, so I was like, all right, buddy. You started this.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Miles]

So how much time did you do?

[Michael]

I did a year and a half.

[Charlie Barrons]

A year and a half. Holy shit. What'd you do to this guy? Did he die?

[Michael]

No, he didn't die. I just. I shattered his jaw into a couple pieces.

[Miles]

Wow. So you own the bar now? Like, I feel like you guys basically fought for pink slips of the bar.

[Michael]

No, I don't own the bar. I. I don't go up there anymore because I feel like if I do that, I'm gonna be met with the police telling me to turn around.

[Neil]

It's.

[Miles]

It's very smart move by you.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. That's the problem with fighting, man, is, like, if you win, you lose. Like.

[Michael]

Yeah, you lose.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. You can't. Like, when you're a kid, you get into fights, you know, you go to the bar, you do that, and then when you get older, you realize, I'm gon to lose, like, everything. I got to maybe win this fight, you know?

[Michael]

Yeah. Yeah. I wish I was thinking about it at the time. I wasn't.

[Charlie Barrons]

The lecture's about a year and a half delayed.

[Miles]

Charlie, I got one more question for you. Can you provide any insight to us about what prison's like?

[Michael]

It's weird, I'll tell you that. It's a weird, weird. Well, all right, well, buckle in, boys, because it's about to get weird.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Michael]

So my first day there. I've never been to prison. I'm not gonna lie to you. I was in my pants. I'm like, these guys are gonna probably whoop my ass just because I'm a skinny little white boy. And. But it wasn't like that. I had a cube with four other dudes in it. We were in a big old Dorm with, like, 200 other dudes. And so you have these rows of. Where everyone lives, right? And on the first row is the people that come in, like, they're the new. New fish. Whatever you want to call them. They're the new guys. And so this one, it's my first week, right? Or it's my second week, and another ride in comes in, and here comes this guy. Didn't look like a guy. Had titties, had an ass, and had long black hair. I'm like, what in the. What is going on here? And then, so anyways, I'm, you know, I'm sitting down at the card table, we're playing a little bit spade, and this guy walks by and some. What do you call the real tight pants girls wear? What do you call those? I forget.

[Miles]

Yoga pants.

[Michael]

Yeah, those. I'm like, what? He's just walking around showing that. I'm like, okay, now it's about to get real weird. So I wake up in the morning because I got a job working in the library, just cleaning and whatnot. I wake up and I go to take a shower, and I'm like, that's weird. Why are people clapping in here? Well. Well, I tell you what. I look over and there's a curtain over the shower, and I see four. Four feet, boys.

[Charlie Barrons]

What? Why?

[Michael]

Go ahead. Go ahead.

[Charlie Barrons]

No, you go ahead.

[Michael]

I was just gonna say I turned right around and I let them finish their session. And then I got into the shower about 15 minutes later.

[Charlie Barrons]

Wow.

[Miles]

Wow. Yeah, I mean, I was maybe looking for, like, how's the food? You know? You know, are the beds comfy, maybe, something like that. Did not expect. Cheeks. Clapping in the shower.

[Michael]

Yeah. Yeah, the. The food was food, like the equivalent of, like, nursing home food. It's just bland, and they give you a lot of beans.

[Charlie Barrons]

Beans. Easy source of protein.

[Michael]

I tell you, there's one thing I was not mad about, going to prison for it. Because when I went In, I was 215. By the time I got out, I was 175.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, wow.

[Miles]

So I lost a good little diet.

[Michael]

Yeah, it was an unwanted diet, but it sure was a good diet.

[Charlie Barrons]

Probably took a little oomph out of that punch, you know?

[Michael]

I don't know. I haven't tried again because now I'm on probation, so I'm not trying to end up back there.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Did you get any fights in prison?

[Michael]

No, I didn't. You know, I was. I learned. I like to read a lot because the TV there, it kind of sucked. And I got tired of watching tv, so I picked up some books, and I read a lot.

[Miles]

Nice.

[Charlie Barrons]

There you go.

[Miles]

Yeah, a little positive out of it.

[Charlie Barrons]

Sounds like a. Sounds like a prison librarian to me. Miles.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

What was your favorite book you read in prison?

[Michael]

Probably as the Crow Flies by Jeffrey Archer.

[Miles]

Nice. I haven't read it was a pretty.

[Charlie Barrons]

Good book, this, like you said.

[Michael]

You have.

[Miles]

I have not. I haven't. No.

[Charlie Barrons]

It's like the Midwest Shawshank Redemption we're hearing right now, you know?

[Michael]

Okay, so speaking of Shawshank, the prison I was at was literally when I come out and I would, like, walk around the yard stuff, I could see Shawshank.

[Charlie Barrons]

You could see Shawshank?

[Michael]

Yeah, dude, I live in Mansfield. So where the prison was, the old reformatory, which you guys know is Shawshank. If we call it the reformatory, yada yada. It's literally like you would walk out of your house, warehouse looking deal, and it's right there.

[Miles]

Huh. Well, you did.

[Charlie Barrons]

I didn't know that. I honestly didn't even know where Shawshank was.

[Miles]

I never even thought to ask where Shawshank was.

[Michael]

Yeah, it's right here in Mansfield.

[Charlie Barrons]

Wow. Well, this is a. This is a whole new.

[Miles]

We've.

[Charlie Barrons]

We've covered a lot of territory on this call.

[Miles]

More territory than we bargained for.

[Charlie Barrons]

That thing going on in the shower, was that a. Was that something everyone wanted to be a part of or.

[Michael]

If you were into that, that's what you did kind of deal. If you didn't, you just kind of look the other way and let those guys do what they do.

[Miles]

It's got. It's a don't ask, don't tell situation.

[Michael]

A lot of things are don't ask, don't tell.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's like CTE in the NFL. You know?

[Charlie Barrons]

What kind of. Yeah. What kind of contraband did you have snuck in there?

[Michael]

Well, let me clarify, just in case my PO's listening. I did not sneak anything in there.

[Miles]

Okay, but you saw.

[Michael]

I had witnessed. There is a little bit of pot. There was some mess. There was tobacco. There's stuff.

[Miles]

That's crazy.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, you can get all that.

[Michael]

Oh, you can get all that. And people would make hooch out of, like, we get little fruits and stuff. So people would bring it back from the chow hall, and they'd let it ferment and add, like, ketchup and jelly and all sorts of other. And they. We get these little trash cans. You know the tiny little office one.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Michael]

They'd put a trash bag inside those, let everything ferment, and they'd make hooch that's gone.

[Charlie Barrons]

Wait, hooch out of what? Orange?

[Miles]

Fruits. Fruit.

[Charlie Barrons]

Fruits, yeah.

[Michael]

Jellies, jelly, stuff like that.

[Miles]

So is. Is the shower cheek clapping the way that you get your Hands on some meth or what's is the form of payment or what. What are we talking on payment wise?

[Michael]

So I know cash app was a big thing and Apple pay, they just call their people from the outside and money would exchange and next thing someone would be up for four straight days and.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, why would you want. Why would you want to do meth in prison?

[Michael]

Well, I mean, they come in there, you know, they were drug addicts before. That was their drug of choice, I suppose.

[Charlie Barrons]

Like, hey, I can keep doing it, I suppose. Wow. What was your weapon? Do you have a shank?

[Michael]

No, I did not. It wasn't like I was at a level 1, which was the lowest level low. You got 1, 2, threes, and then I think it's a 3R is what they call it where you only get like, you get an hour out of your spell a day, and that's about it.

[Miles]

Wow. So you were in prison light is what it sounds like.

[Michael]

Yeah, pretty much.

[Charlie Barrons]

Not prison. Genuine draft.

[Miles]

That's the next step. All right, man, well, we appreciate you calling in. You got to get back to work, so.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Think about your drive out song though, to bring this full circle.

[Michael]

I will. I'll tell you guys before you go, if you ever want to come out, I can get you ticket.

[Miles]

Okay, great.

[Charlie Barrons]

Great.

[Miles]

That's huge.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, we. We just might take you up on that.

[Miles]

How much is a ticket running these days?

[Michael]

Oh, I get tickets for free, so if you bring me. I'm not gonna drink it, but if you bring me a bottle of that baron brandy, I'll give you both weekend tickets.

[Charlie Barrons]

Hell yeah, I'll bring you two bottles. Yeah, maybe we come to town, we go to that, and we. We go to a bellied up from the prison. Nope, nope, nope. No entertainment. Think about the. Okay, you're good. You don't want to go back.

[Miles]

He's like, definitely. He's like, I don't. He's like, I don't want to go back, but I might go back. And I can't embarrass myself in front of all my future roommates. You know, if I bring those guys there, I'll never hear the end of it.

[Charlie Barrons]

Well, look, good luck, stay. Stay out of trouble.

[Michael]

Of course.

[Charlie Barrons]

And good luck with the divorce. It can't be easy. I've been there, man. I've been there.

[Michael]

Have you.

[Charlie Barrons]

So good luck and I appreciate that. Thanks for calling in before we go.

[Miles]

When I adjust my original overalls outfit. You've been to prison? Dude, we need to get you in an orange Jumpsuit.

[Michael]

Can we get a different color?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. What's your favorite color?

[Michael]

I don't know. I like the classic, you know, blue jean denim. Dan. Overall.

[Charlie Barrons]

There you go. Oh, that's the Shawshank special, man.

[Miles]

Yeah. You really like Shawshank?

[Michael]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right, all right, all right. Well, we'll make it happen. We'll make it happen.

[Miles]

Well, thanks for calling in today, man.

[Michael]

Well, thanks for having me, fellas. This was awesome.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, good luck with everything. We're glad you're on the straight and narrow now.

[Michael]

Yes, sir. Well, good luck with the podcast. I'll be listening some more.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right, thank you kindly. We'll talk to you soon.

[Miles]

You know, his voice didn't sound like I went to prison for breaking a guy's jaw that was shattering his jaw.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, yeah.

[Miles]

It's always also a guy in his scenario, he never. They never say I just broke his jaw. They always say that they shattered it.

[Charlie Barrons]

Duke went to prison for a year and a half. I'm gonna say he shattered.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

I'm gonna say, like, you just break it. One place. That thing had to be rebuilt.

[Miles]

And this is a good time for a nice psa, folks. You're having some whiskeys with your buddies and someone starts mouthing off, just be the bigger man. Just go to the next bar. All those. All they're looking for is attention, right? You know?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. And I, I, I had this little, Little quick story on that. I was walking with my buddy.

[Miles]

Yeah, you've told me.

[Charlie Barrons]

Did I tell you it on this podcast?

[Miles]

I don't know.

[Charlie Barrons]

Ah, whatever.

[Miles]

Just tell quick.

[Charlie Barrons]

So I was walking with my buddy, and this dude is, is driving in a, Riding a bird scooter. He's got someone on the back of it, and he was coming right toward me and my buddy. And my buddy was like, you're not supposed to be on the sidewalk with that scooter because he's kind of a narc. And that pissed this guy off. And because he had his lady on the back of the scooter, apparently he felt like he had to show force, you know? So he comes by and we're like, halfway down the block now. He comes by on a bird scooter, and he does sort of a drive by on a scooter.

[Miles]

He did, like, clothesline, little haymaker.

[Charlie Barrons]

It was like a haymaker off the scooter, him in the back of that. I reflexively, like, went after the guy and fought him, and I, I hit him a couple times and got in the street. And then I saw this car Coming. And I had this flash go right through my head. This car hits this guy, he dies, it's over, like for this guy. But then also, you know, I'm a. I'm an idiot. I'm in a huge deal. So then I pull him out of the street, and then I'm like, all right, you got to chill. You got to chill. You got to chill. And then what ended up breaking the fight was this woman there with her dog. And she said, I'm calling the police because you're scaring my dog. That that was the right move in this scenario, was whatever she did to de escalate it. But that was dumb. That was dumb on me.

[Miles]

I'll tell you, maybe a great way to de escalate. Charlie just unlocked. Just have someone announce that the police are coming and it'll de escalate everything. Even if they're not.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, yeah. No, I mean, it's, it's, it's the move because, yeah, you hit someone the wrong way and. And they knock, they pass out, they can hit their head on a curb. You know, you can die pretty easily from.

[Miles]

Yeah, that'd be bad.

[Charlie Barrons]

That would be bad.

[Miles]

Glad you didn't do that.

[Charlie Barrons]

And then before you know it, guys, you're sitting there in prison just reading books and walking into doors you wish you didn't walk into. So there you have it.

[Miles]

To dang, another caller.

[Charlie Barrons]

Let's do it. Hey, Russell.

[Miles]

Yeah, welcome back, by the way.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, welcome back to the Belly Dub podcast. So Miles and I, we've been, we've been chit chatting this, we've been riffing it, spitballing. There's a lot of states in the Midwest. You've covered a lot of them. Which state gets injured the most?

[Russell]

Well, that is a good question, and I cannot answer that. Like, as far as the actual data, you know, I don't have that.

[Charlie Barrons]

But.

[Russell]

But from my experience, I would say you see a lot of injuries in the states that have large metropolitan areas. Like for example, in Wisconsin, you have Milwaukee and a little bit into Madison. In Minnesota, for example, you have obviously the Twin Cities, North Dakota, I guess you can kind of say Fargo. But what I've seen, the worst injuries are the states that have a lot of rural roads that are like the two lane, 55 mile an hour roads. Those are where the most things happen. Wisconsin has a ton of those. Anytime you get out of basically Milwaukee, you hit those. And so I'd say Wisconsin, we see a lot of, unfortunately, a lot of bad injuries because of the two lane 55 mile an hour roads and you see a lot of, you know, you've got driveways up and down them, you've got intersecting roads. And so that's what my experience has been as far as accidents and injuries.

[Charlie Barrons]

A lot of milk. We do see them. Is it what, a lot of milk trucks?

[Russell]

A lot of milk trucks. We see a lot of truck injuries in Iowa and in North Dakota too. North Dakota, there's some interesting. They run some interesting rigs out there.

[Charlie Barrons]

So.

[Russell]

And I don't know what it is, sometimes I feel like they're just throwing anybody behind a wheel.

[Miles]

And I totally get the two lane road thing because when I was in high school, had a Dodge Dakota Sport.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh, not to flex.

[Miles]

V8. Not to flex. And me and my buddies were doing the old caravan to the lake. Oh, two lane road. And I was the last one in the caravan or second to last or something. And there was a moment for us to pass a car because we were going the speed limit being a teenager, you know.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Right.

[Miles]

And long story short, we decided to do collectively as a group, a quad pass.

[Charlie Barrons]

Ah, always a good idea.

[Miles]

So we decided to pass four cars at one time on a two lane road in Minnesota. And the first three of us made it through no problem. And as I'm driving on the road and looking in my rear view mirror, I see my buddy pulling up the rear. And luckily he was able to get past the last car and dart in the car in the other lane. Might have had to have slowed down quite a bit. And so it's a little PSA for everyone out there. Don't be Miles in high school.

[Charlie Barrons]

That's just a good lesson all the way around. And you can even take out the in high school. Don't be like Miles.

[Russell]

There could be a class on that. Don't be like Miles and his walks through like his life stories of what he's done and like what not to do.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, that's the title of his memoir for a book. Yeah.

[Miles]

Don't be like Miles.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right, well, listen, Russell, you be careful out there and we don't want you have to call your brother, all right?

[Russell]

Yeah, I appreciate that. You guys take it. Be safe. Miles. No, you especially. But thanks for having me, guys.

[Charlie Barrons]

I appreciate you.

[Michael]

Right.

[Charlie Barrons]

See you soon.

[Miles]

Thank you. Yeah. So guys, Neil has a spicy situation with his father in law. Neil, will you enlighten us on what's going on with your father in law?

[Neil]

Yeah. So, well, technically he's going to be my father in law on Saturday, which adds to the chaos here.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Charlie Barrons]

Hey, congratulations.

[Miles]

Congrats.

[Neil]

Thank you. Yeah. So you want the short story? The whole story?

[Charlie Barrons]

We want the whole story.

[Neil]

Okay, so just for a little reference, I didn't really know what was going on up until maybe about a month or two ago.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Neil]

But back in November. Well, this is. This is going to be my fiance's father's third marriage. Or. No, he's in the middle of his third marriage and they've been married, I think about 12 years. And back in November, we're. Me, my fiance and I are going to Utah to visit her mom. And he shows. Before we leave, he shows my fiance some video. This girl doing cosplay, some video game cosplay on his phone. And he's like, look at this cool friend of mine. And my fiance's like, that's kind of weird. Why, you know, why are you showing me this Instagram video, this cosplayer? And why is she your friend? And we didn't think a whole lot of it. We thought he was either kidding or just joking around and he thought it was cool. So whatever. And then fast forward a couple months and we find out he's been supposedly messaging this woman. And we dig a little deeper and turns out she's this only fan star making content with her husband on only fans. And he has been messaging this girl a lot, apparently every day, and thinks he's in love and wants to start a new life with this onlyfans woman.

[Charlie Barrons]

This is the whole story. Holy smokes.

[Miles]

This is modern day falling in love with stripper.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, that's exactly. Yeah. They wrote rap songs about this 20 years ago, just not on the exact topic. It doesn't have the same ring to.

[Miles]

It, but not the same.

[Charlie Barrons]

You get it? You get it?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

And what's crazy, I bet this only fans mount is like, I don't know, 12 other guys who's sending her money on the reg.

[Miles]

Probably at least, don't you think?

[Charlie Barrons]

Well, I bet this is money on top of the standard only fans money, I suppose. Yeah.

[Miles]

It seems like there's still more that is happening.

[Neil]

We did a little test because it seemed. It just seemed odd to us that this onlyfans woman, who's probably in her 20s or 30s, is all of a sudden gonna get up and leave her husband and the successful only fan. Well, I don't even know if it's successful, but so far it sounds successful. Yeah. Just to go get with some mid-50s balding man and start a new life. And so she. This only fans woman. I Can't remember her name, but that's what I'm gonna refer to her as.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, right, yeah. We are gonna get that name out of you by the end of this phone call.

[Miles]

I don't remember her name.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, dude, and don't sell your father in law short either. Maybe he's got a massive hog. All right.

[Neil]

Maybe he does. I don't know. I don't know if I want to find out, but.

[Charlie Barrons]

Sounds like you're going down that road right now though.

[Neil]

We did a little test because she posts daily videos of like a, like a life vlog. And in one of these videos, her husband got her some new pet. I think it was like a parrot or something. And so we told, we told my future father in law, we said, hey, how's, you know, how's she liking her new pet bird that she got? He's like, I don't know, she hasn't said anything. So he messaged who he thought was this only fans girl. But apparently whoever he was messaging had no idea about this pet parrot or bird or whatever she got. So now we're thinking that, that either this only fans woman has outsourced her communications to some guy in India and he's been paying to message some guy in India who he thinks is this only fans woman.

[Miles]

Oh, dude, I know he's just messaging another guy.

[Charlie Barrons]

Dude, a hundred percent. So I gotta tell you man, I have, right now, right now I have like probably three people that message me asking that this has happened. One person's come to a show, another person has messaged me, Another person went to the news because. And I was on the news talking about it. But people will impersonate public figures, make them think like, hey, this is my private account, whatever, start messaging them, start getting money from them. Like a lot of times it's gift cards is a very weird, well known scam. And they'll send pictures, the, the, the whole deal. And that, that happens so often. So it sounds like your father in law got scammed.

[Neil]

That's what we're thinking.

[Miles]

How much money do you think he's been scammed out of? If you had to guess.

[Neil]

Probably thousands. And the only reason I think that is because he's quite the gambler. And whenever he's home from work, maybe about, I don't know, maybe once a month, he'll just go blow three grand at the casino.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Neil]

Come home when it's 10,000.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Does he have a good job?

[Neil]

Yeah, they. He and his current wife own a trucking business.

[Charlie Barrons]

He's gonna lose half of that.

[Miles]

Yeah. What does the. Does his wife know?

[Neil]

Yeah, yeah that's the, that's the other fun part of it. She knows and he's told her and.

[Miles]

They'Re just working through it or.

[Neil]

Yeah, they, I guess they've been doing therapy. I don't know where it currently stands, but they've been doing therapy the last couple weeks.

[Charlie Barrons]

So it should be a fun wedding.

[Miles]

Is. Is the only fans model invited to the wedding. As is plus oh shoot.

[Charlie Barrons]

For sure. God.

[Miles]

As is plus two.

[Neil]

I hope not.

[Charlie Barrons]

You know he sent an invite in the mail.

[Neil]

Took his invite and send it out to her.

[Miles]

Oh that's. That's yikes.

[Charlie Barrons]

It happens man. It happens. It happens to a lot of people. It really does. I mean I know three people who it's. It's happened. People have impersonating me and they've. These people messaged me and they've sent money sent money sent money sent pictures. So like thought we were in a romantic thing with like a terrible thing. It was like Charlie Barron's official 8298 underscore. I was like are you kid. Like come on now that is, that's tough.

[Miles]

I hope that doesn't happen with. I, I'm. I don't think I have enough notoriety.

[Charlie Barrons]

You pro. You probably do that. You just don't check your messages. My brother checks my messages so I heard about it. I mean I checked some of them like, like some dms but not a lot. And one person emailed me. They got a hold my actual email and yeah, I haven't contact the police but that, that does happen quite a bit and it's, it's popping up more and more. I was on a news story all about it.

[Miles]

Yeah, I'll have to check it out.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, check it out. It's on the real news. So your father in law, man, oh man. At least he's got money though. You know it' sad when they don't have money and they spend all of it on their Walmart gift cards. You know that's what these people ask for. Guys, I don't need Walmart gift cards. Now if it was asking for coordinates to your fishing spot and maybe a Fleet Farm gift card, that's a different story. But definitely not Walmart. Come on now.

[Miles]

So how do you. Is he still. Does he think he's getting scanned or does he still think that he's in love with this, this guy in India?

[Michael]

I don't, I don't.

[Neil]

I mean I don't. I really don't want to bring it up because it's kind of weird, but I think after our little test, I think that kind of opened his eyes a little bit because about. About the time we started doing that test is when they started going to therapy. So I think. Yeah, I think it's. I think it's getting fixed now, but I don't know for certain.

[Miles]

What is your fiance think of the whole scenario?

[Neil]

She wants to castrate them.

[Charlie Barrons]

Like chemically or with.

[Miles]

With a rusty kitchen knife.

[Neil]

Yeah, I think she wants to make it hurt as badly as possible.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay.

[Miles]

She's passed, which is nice for you to know that now. So you know what you're getting into with this marriage, so.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Don't you be going on only fans either. Otherwise you're gonna get castrated rated yourself.

[Neil]

I think I'll be fine. She wants kids, so I think I'll be all right for at least a couple years.

[Miles]

What does that mean?

[Charlie Barrons]

How many only fans accounts do you subscribe to?

[Miles]

Just the one. Just the one that he went on her page.

[Charlie Barrons]

I'm waiting on a reply right now. Sorry. Five.

[Neil]

Zero.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, zero. Which way were your eyes looking when you said zero?

[Neil]

Right at the phone.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, there you go. There you go. Are you still subscribed to that account, by the way?

[Neil]

Oh, no, we never. We never got on her only fans. We were on her like, Instagram and Tick tock.

[Miles]

Got it.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, I. I got you. That makes sense. Well, hey, good luck getting married, man. Yeah. Yeah. That's exciting.

[Miles]

You guys giving a speech at the wedding?

[Neil]

Probably not.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay, smart. You know the thing about speeches at weddings where there's booze and a microphone, anyone who wants to go goes, you know? Yeah.

[Neil]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Are you guys excited or is this playing a cloud over your marriage day?

[Neil]

No, I'm still excited. I mean, to be honest, you know, I don't. All this kind of stuff I don't care about. All that matters is her and I are happy. And that's. That's the goal right there. So I really don't care. Doesn't bother me a whole lot, but.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, Ma' am. Well, we're happy for you guys.

[Neil]

Thanks.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay. I mean, I meant that heartfelt.

[Miles]

We're not happy for you that your father in law is getting scammed by a guy in you. We're happy for your. Your marriage.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Trying to move past it, you know? What do you guys want for your wedding? Huh?

[Neil]

What do we want for our wedding?

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah.

[Neil]

Oh, I don't know.

[Charlie Barrons]

You guys on the not dot com. Miles is buying.

[Miles]

Charlie forgot his wallet.

[Charlie Barrons]

I forgot my wallet at home. Yeah. So tell us the most expensive thing on your. The not dot com.

[Neil]

Oh, what is the most expensive thing on there?

[Charlie Barrons]

Go big.

[Neil]

I don't even know. I didn't even. She set that all up. All I put on there was you all know what Warhammer is?

[Charlie Barrons]

Warhammer?

[Neil]

Yeah. No, no, it's like a board game, but you build all your figurines on it. And so I got this like $200 figure on there. That's about the only thing I put on.

[Charlie Barrons]

That's hilarious. Jake's over here just shaking his head. Jake's like, I love. Jake's super excited about this. Nice. Well, you got one fan here of your wedding gift.

[Miles]

Well, when Charlie gets back to Milwaukee, he'll head to the Knot dot com and they'll get you that figurine.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, you know what? Here's what I'm gonna do and I promise you I'll do this. Text us the link to your thing. If nobody else buys it for you, I'll get it for you. All right.

[Neil]

All right.

[Charlie Barrons]

How much?

[Miles]

I'm just gonna tell everyone not buy it.

[Charlie Barrons]

No, no, don't do that, dude. That's cheating. That's cheating?

[Miles]

Yeah, you want to end up like your father in law? All right, don't cheat on this.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So set. But you gotta send the link because I'll be. Jared. Jared will send it to me then, so. All right.

[Neil]

Someone already bought it.

[Charlie Barrons]

Thank you, God. Thank you, God. Wow. Who. Who do that?

[Neil]

Probably my friends who play with me.

[Charlie Barrons]

You should rephrase that.

[Miles]

I was thinking. I didn't know how to say it, so thank you.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Well, hey, we're sorry that your father in law fell in love with the Indian dude posing as an only fans girl. That is a big business. So that is worth a significant portion of India's gdp. I'm not even kidding you. I read a friggin article on it. But man, this world's freaking crazy. It's all nuts. Started going downhill with Pong anyways.

[Neil]

Oh man.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, have a great time at your wedding. Thanks for calling in, man. And good luck.

[Neil]

All right. You guys have a good day too. Thank you.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right, we'll see you soon. Bye Bye.

[Miles]

Yeah, did you ever find out who was scamming that people pretending to be you?

[Charlie Barrons]

Dude, it's could. No, it's.

[Miles]

Was it a guy in India or.

[Charlie Barrons]

No, probably, man. Like it's a mil. It's like when we have merch we put up merch, and then there's, like, a thousand replica at this point. It's like, it could be an AI agent, you know, an AI bot just doing it. It's. Anybody. There is a huge. There is a huge industry around this exact thing. Like, and it's all. I guarantee you, if. If Miles has scammed you out of money or photos, send us a picture less or send us a thing. Let us know. They send me the screenshots of these conversations. These guys are like. They're like romance. They're acting romantic to them.

[Miles]

And question, are they good enough at catfishing, where they'll throw in a Watch.

[Charlie Barrons]

Out for deer catfishing. They do some of that. They do some of that.

[Miles]

Use your tagline.

[Charlie Barrons]

Yeah, they try to. They, like, try to bring in, like. Like, my grandma or someone, like, I publicly had in a video. They'll, like, drop their name, you know, like, they've gotten more sophisticated. It's not just, you know, doing research. Right. Well, I mean, you know, you type some in the chat, it can write the whole goddamn catfishing script for you.

[Miles]

It's true. You know it's true.

[Charlie Barrons]

So anyways.

[Miles]

All right, we have a voicemail from Blake. Charlie.

[Charlie Barrons]

Blake.

[Miles]

Here we go.

[Charlie Barrons]

Blake.

[Blake]

Hey there, Miles and Charlie. Hope you guys are doing good. Mine, Blake. Here we are in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. Some people say ocleezy, but I don' Know why they do. I'm sitting here on the porch rubbing my mandolin next to my dog Berkey. Berkey, you want to say hi? Okay, calm down there, sir. Anyway, he says hi to you guys. He also says, watch out for deer. He likes deer, by the way. But, yeah, let me play you a little tune here.

[Charlie Barrons]

Oh.

[Michael]

Okay.

[Blake]

Hope you guys have a good one.

[Charlie Barrons]

Damn, he should have kept going. That was almost their intro song.

[Miles]

It was. Oh, we could probably just clip that and put it just.

[Charlie Barrons]

Okay. I was just starting to bob my head. Okay. Man, that guy's great.

[Miles]

Wait, did he not want to do a call? No. I mean, in future episodes, could we hit that guy up and get him? I want to talk to this guy.

[Charlie Barrons]

I want to know where his accents from. Didn't he sound like he's from, like, down south for a little bit there?

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't. And he seemed like a character in a movie.

[Charlie Barrons]

He did. He did to him. Yeah, Yeah.

[Miles]

I. I love how he does the dog noises for him.

[Charlie Barrons]

Dude, I couldn't tell. I was just gonna ask. Play that again. Is that. Yeah, this deserves a second play.

[Blake]

Hey there, Miles. And Charlie. Hope you guys are doing good.

[Charlie Barrons]

Good.

[Blake]

Mine's Blake. Here we are in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. Some people say Oklisi, but I don't know why they do. I'm sitting here on the porch rubbing my mandolin next to my dog Berkey. Berkey, you want to say hi? Okay, calm down there, sir. Anyway, he says hi to you guys. He also says, watch out for deer. He likes deer, by the way. But, yeah, let me play a little tune here.

[Michael]

Okay.

[Blake]

Hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye now.

[Charlie Barrons]

You know what?

[Miles]

Let's. Can we clip that and make that the end of the episode? Okay. Have a good one. Let's do that. That is money.

[Charlie Barrons]

Have you guys. Have you ever seen, like, an Opry? Like, in Oklahoma or in Nashville? They have, like, an Opry kind of thing. He. He seems like a host for a show. Like. Like, even every word he talks, it sounds like a song, you know?

[Miles]

And he's always got his fingers in his belt loops.

[Charlie Barrons]

That's a. That's a skill, man. Yeah, we gotta talk to that guy.

[Miles]

That's a great ending to the podcast. Just throwing that guy in there.

[Charlie Barrons]

Hell, yeah. Let's call it a day. Yeah.

[Miles]

Well, Miles, another good episode of the Bellied up podcast here at Sweet Shots.

[Charlie Barrons]

Might I say great episode. And I just want to remind the folks, tip your bartender.

[Miles]

Absolutely. Tip your bartender.

[Charlie Barrons]

I don't have a wallet today, Miles.

[Miles]

I will tip the bartender.

[Charlie Barrons]

All right. I'll pay you back.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, we'll see. All right, have a good one, guys. See you. Next one.

[Michael]

Okay.

[Blake]

Hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye, now.