Grandma Gives The "Worst" Christmas Gifts #195

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast - Episode 195

“Grandma Gives The 'Worst' Christmas Gifts” (April 9, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode recorded at the iconic Ten29 Bar in Minneapolis, hosts Myles (You Betcha Guy) and Charlie Berens belly up to the bar to riff on small-town bar culture, interact with colorful local patrons, and take live callers. This week’s theme explores family traditions, bizarre Christmas gifts from grandma, and the quirks of Midwest life, all wrapped in the show’s signature blend of humor, irreverence, and genuine connection. Expect plenty of playful roasting, Midwest bar stories, advice for awkward situations, an exploration of LinkedIn etiquette, and a memorable deep-dive into atrocious family gift-giving.

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Bar Banter & Setting the Mood

[00:00-05:00]

• The duo discuss the unique décor of the Ten29 Bar, a “police bar” with bras and badges decorating the walls.
• Light, off-the-cuff jokes about the business of sitting alone at a bar at 12:45 on a Tuesday—how not to look like a "loser":
  • Bring a laptop, pretend to do work.
  • Hold a menu like you’re “just stopping in for lunch.”
  • Wear a polo with a beer logo—“Then you look like you’re a beer salesman.” (A)
  • “Every beer salesman I’ve met is a drunk. But it’s a professional drunk.” (A, 03:19)
• Joking about why Tiger Woods doesn’t have a driver: “The first time you roll your car over, I’m getting you a driver for Christmas.” (B, 06:05)

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Iconic Locals & Bar Stories

[07:31-16:24]
A group of regulars join the show, sharing stories from years of coming to Ten29 Bar:

• The discovery of Fireball whisky at the bar in 2013.
• Their “Friday ritual” of lobster mac & cheese, meat raffles, and spending long lunches (to the amusement/annoyance of bosses).
• The evolution from “bar spouses” to close friends, cemented over years and life changes.
  • “For a long time…they assumed we were sp[ouses]. And we had to correct them. Just bar spouses, not real spouses.” (E, 09:39)
• Remembering lost friends and staff, highlighting the bar’s tight-knit, multigenerational community spirit.
• Occasional playful ribbing with the hosts about drinking, losing weight, and “meat raffle” prowess.
  • “Don’t take advice from a skinny chef.” (D, 15:01)
  • “Now you look like you belong in Minneapolis.” (D, 15:12)

Memorable Quotes:

• “This is the best bar in the world right here.” (D, 17:10)
• “Get on over to 1029, wear two bras if you come, or no bra. And either way, it'll be fun.” (B, 17:40)

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Meeting Marley: The Mustachioed Neighbor

[25:54-38:09]
Enter Marley—a bar regular, chef at a senior living center, notorious for his impressive mustache and legendary local status:

• Marley claims to have “multiple girlfriends: Allegedly. It’s a block schedule. Like divorced parents, three days on, three days off.” (F, 28:45)
• Describes the wild world of the senior center—shuffleboard as the real “pickup game,” and hints at wild stories among residents.
• A segment about “wenis” (elbow skin) pinching spreads, with everyone testing if they can “feel their wenis.”
• Marley’s bathroom graffiti memorializing bar regulars adds to the “Ten29 Hall of Fame.”
• “You could sell a horse to a Subaru dealer.” (B, 89:32)

Other memorable banter:

• “What do you want out of life?” (B, 33:40)
  “To be happy. I’m happy, I guess.” (F, 33:44)
• “If Bellied Up ever needs some 3D modeling done, I got you guys covered.” (C, 91:36)

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Call-in Highlights

1. Caller "Nate" (Nathaniel) - The Saga of Awful Grandma Gifts

[50:26-92:36]

• Backdrop: Nate, a chatty engineering student at Central Michigan, calls in to riff on LinkedIn, life, and—most memorably—his grandmother’s “legendarily bad” Christmas gifts.
• Pre-Gifts Banter:
  • Dissects LinkedIn profiles of the hosts and producer Jared, leading to running jokes about “work, work, work” posts.
• Grandma’s Gifts Story:
  • Nate builds up to the gifts: wrapped in mismatched, torn paper, often misspelled (“Nathany”) (C, 74:08), gifting used notepads from hospitals or hotels, half-used hand sanitizer, and worn-out workplace gloves.
  • The piece de resistance: a custom 2025 calendar—actually a sunset calendar with magazine car photos taped over the sunrises.
    • “She bought a sunset calendar and then cut out pictures of cars and taped them in the sunset setting.” (A, 78:27)
    • “She wrote hand sanitizer on it in case we didn't know.” (C, 76:15)
    • “This has got to be the worst I’ve seen.” (A, 79:00)
  • Family dynamics are laid bare: Grandma uninvited from gatherings after “Thanksgiving shenanigans,” and Nate’s mom posting everything on Facebook.
• Hosts’ Take:
  • “Think of all the thought your grandma put into that.” (B, 78:51)
  • “Just put some of that hand sanitizer on it, and it should clean it right up.” (B, 76:34)
  • “What do you hate about your mom?” (A, 84:20)

2. LinkedIn Power Rankings & Roast

[49:34-68:25]

• Nate and the hosts joke about the absurdity of “open to work” tags, stacking LinkedIn bios with nonsense skills, random “endorsements,” and the real-world futility of blue-collar LinkedIn networking vs. just using Angie’s List:
  • “That makes me want to snort glass, to be honest with you.” (B, 66:29)

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Running Gags and Noteworthy Quotes

• “You lose weight and suddenly you’re insecure you’re not fat enough. That’s never happened in the world ever.” (A, 19:22)
• “People say I look like I just got done having a three-way coke bender with a bass and a walleye. I’ve got that hanging on my fridge.” (B, 20:40)
• “My moves are not on par. Let me tell you.” (C, 58:16)
• “You’re a real piece of work—in the best way.” (B, 88:37)

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Life Advice & Comedy Insights

• Pushing back against “you’re always 10% at fault in a rear-end accident” insurance myth with guest attorney Russell Nicolette (39:03-43:24).
• Playful encouragement: All crying triggers, “pushing feelings down,” and complex sibling power rankings:
  • “It’s like NFL power rankings. They change every single day for no reason.” (G, 23:30)
• Charlie’s on-stage advice for actors: “If you push everything in your life down for years, you have an encyclopaedia of triggers.”

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• 00:00–05:00: Opening bar banter, “How not to look like a loser drinking alone”
• 07:31–17:40: Regulars’ stories: Fireball, lobster mac, bar spouses, and eulogies
• 25:54–38:09: Marley’s mustache, “multiple girlfriends,” and nursing home gossip
• 39:03–43:24: Guest lawyer Russell, insurance accident myths debunked
• 49:34–68:25: Nate’s LinkedIn roast, hosts’ own cringy bios, stock photo entrepreneurship
• 71:29–81:03: Grandma’s worst gifts: The infamous “custom” calendar, repurposed notes, weird hand sanitizer
• 84:20–89:01: Therapy hour: airing family grievances, leading questions, “public shaming” stories

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Episode Vibe & Takeaways

Language/Tone:
Friendly, unfiltered, and deeply Midwestern—irreverent jokes, heartfelt memories, and relentless, affectionate roasting.

If You Missed It:

• Expect quick wits, unpredictable guests, a whole lot of barroom authenticity, and the longest riff you’ll ever hear about grandma’s “one-of-a-kind” (i.e., regifted, dumpster-dived) calendar.
• You’ll learn that there’s always a story behind bad gifts, and that every bar regular—and family—has secrets, traditions, and plenty to laugh about.
• The chemistry between Myles and Charlie makes even mundane Midwest moments laugh-out-loud hilarious.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• “Every beer salesman I’ve met is a drunk. But it’s a professional drunk.” (A, 03:19)
• “If you’re an Uber driver and you pick up Tiger Woods... you’re not paying attention to the road. You’re just rear view mirror the whole time.” (B, 05:45)
• “This bar is the best bar in the world right here.” (D, 17:10)
• "Don't take advice from a skinny chef." (D, 15:01)
• “If Bellied Up ever needs 3D modeling done, I got you guys covered.” (C, 91:36)
• “This has got to be the worst [grandma gift] I’ve seen.” (A, 79:00)
• "She bought a sunset calendar and then cut out pictures of cars and taped them in the sunset setting." (A, 78:27)
• “People say I look like I just got done having a three-way coke bender with a bass and a walleye. I’ve got that hanging on my fridge.” (B, 20:40)
• “You could sell a horse to a Subaru dealer!” (B, 89:32)

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Final Thoughts

What Bellied Up delivers is more than laughs—it’s the oral history of bar buddies everywhere.
You’ll leave wishing for lobster mac, a meat raffle ticket, and the kind of family stories only the Midwest (and a few shots of Fireball) can deliver.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of the Bellied up podcast. Chuck, how you doing?

[B]

Bellied up. Bellied up. We're here, Miles. I'm feeling good.

[A]

We're bellied up here at the Ten29 Bar here in Minneapolis.

[B]

So many bras. So many bras.

[A]

Also, a lot of police badges or patches on the wall.

[B]

I believe it is a police bar.

[A]

Here is a police bar.

[B]

And bras and police. So just seems like, you know, the only other time those two are combined is.

[A]

Excited to hear this. I would. I would love to hear this.

[B]

I was going for, like, you know, cop stripper. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Bachelor parties.

[B]

Bachelor party. Yeah.

[A]

In 2002.

[B]

2002. That was big, you know?

[A]

Yeah, some of them are pretty big, aren't they, Chuck?

[C]

Look.

[A]

Look at that one over there.

[B]

I know. Those are some over there. Yeah.

[A]

Black one. Smokes.

[B]

You could use those as a live well. My God.

[A]

Good.

[B]

Those could hold. Those could hold a lot of minnows.

[A]

I could put my kid in that. And we got a makeshift hammock.

[B]

Oh, that's not a bad idea, dude. It's not a bad idea at all. You should figure that out. Maybe see if you can borrow that for a little bit.

[A]

Yeah, I think that that's probably gonna go down as a no go from the bar.

[B]

Oh, the bar or.

[A]

Yeah, they're gonna be like, wow, this creep came in and asked for the biggest bra. We have said it was for his kid, but. Chuck. So I was sitting at the bar waiting for you today, as I usually do.

[B]

You waiting on me? No.

[A]

And I was sitting there, and I had the thought that, like, if we didn't have all of this podcast equipment, I was just sitting at this bar by myself.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What signal does that send to the world, considering It's.

[B]

It was 1245.

[A]

45. And it's like, how. What are the ways that you can sit at a bar by yourself at 12:45 on a Tuesday and have people not assume that you're drunk or just a loser?

[B]

You got to bring a laptop. You gotta bring a laptop.

[A]

Bring a laptop to the bar.

[B]

This guy's got it. Check him out, Miles, right there. See? And he's got Red Bull.

[A]

Loser. Because he's got the laptop.

[B]

Yeah, he's got Red Bull sitting right there too. You know there's vodka in that water glass. Yeah, okay. Sorry. Don't want to rat you out. What are you working on over there?

[C]

Just work. Not really work.

[B]

Just work.

[A]

That sounds like. That sounds like the answer of A guy who's trying to make it look like he's not a drunk at the bar. I like that.

[B]

Yeah. See, that's great. That's great.

[A]

Laptop.

[B]

That's a brilliant idea.

[A]

Even if you're just there to drink. Just have it out.

[B]

Yeah. Or just have a food menu in front of you where you're just holding it like this consistently. Yeah.

[A]

Food menu. Huge.

[B]

Yeah. Just have the presence of the food menu. Oh, I'm just stopping in for lunch.

[A]

You know, I think another thing is you make sure you wear a polo with a beer logo on it. And then you just look like you're a beer salesman.

[B]

Beer salesman. You're visiting accounts. This is part of the job.

[A]

Which is kind of funny because every beer salesman I've met is a drunk. So it's like. But it's a professional drunk.

[B]

They. They do it. They do it. Well, I mean, there's some that have been in the business a long time, and I've seen them in action, and you age out of it. Or you just start feeding your beers to the plants. Because when you're going out celebrating with people every single day who. Yeah. The consequences on the liver. This is what my buddy told me.

[A]

He.

[B]

He. He always has one drink. Just like. Just like there. He's like, yeah, it's my third one.

[A]

Yeah. You know, always on number three.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Smart.

[B]

Very smart.

[A]

I think another thing is just have your phone up to your ear.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You know, so if you're just sitting there at the bar like this, it just kind of looks like either you're on hold for something or it'. Oh, well, clearly he knows somebody. So even though they're not here, he's essentially drinking with someone right now.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not a complete loser. You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah. And I think beyond that, you know, you just look around at various things and just say, okay, can I. Do I have a. Like, a shirt with a cable logo on it? Maybe you're the spectrum guy. You know, do you have, you know, toolbox with you? Maybe you're repairing the gambling machines or something.

[A]

Yeah. Maybe just put a pen in your hat and a towel over your shoulder so you look like you're the bartender who's on his break.

[B]

Exactly. Yeah. Now, who are. Who are we doing this for, Miles?

[A]

You know, why do we. Why do we need to signal that we're not a loser?

[B]

Yeah. Because, well, everyone in the bar is doing the same thing, presumably.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

Yeah. But it was a fun game to play. Here's a Question I have for you, Miles. Yeah. Why doesn't Tiger woods have a driver? We should develop that business at the bar today. We should. We should pitch it directly to Tiger. Tiger's driver, you know?

[A]

Yeah. I mean, it's like, I know people who have way less money who are way less famous than Tiger that has a driver.

[B]

Do you think that Tiger. Yeah. Do you think that he's so rich that he doesn't know that Uber exists?

[A]

Yeah, he just doesn't even have a smartphone. His assistant's got a smartphone.

[B]

Yeah. You know, you would. I'm. I'm baffled. Although, if you are a Tiger and you. If you're an Uber driver and you pick up Tiger Woods, I mean, you're not paying attention to the road. You're just rear view mirror the whole time. Yeah. You know?

[A]

No, I mean, it's just. There's just. No, there's no reason why he doesn't have a driver.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Who's.

[B]

Who's letting this happen? Miles, if you. The first time you roll your car over, I'm getting you a driver for Christmas.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

First time.

[A]

All right, well, let's roll the car on the way home. Jared, what do you think?

[B]

Well, let's not try to do it, because I'm only half serious.

[A]

To me, I'll take you up on it. I think it's also very obvious how. Ty.

[C]

What?

[A]

It's obvious how Tiger woods became the best golfer in the world. He's got a very intense personality. If he's banging women, he's having sex with all of them, you know?

[B]

Right.

[A]

If he's doing drugs, he's doing all the hydros he can get his hands.

[B]

He's rolling a car with two hydros in his pocket.

[A]

Correct. He's not just gonna do hydros and just sit on his couch and watch tv.

[B]

He's a real go getter, that Tiger Woods.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I can't even imagine the other stuff he's intense about in his personal life.

[B]

I mean. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, really, not having golf could kill him. You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Golf was keeping him on this, you know? I guess not in the women department, but straight narrow.

[B]

No. That's kind of what started all this. And then how physical is golf that you're rocking hydros like you're Brett Favre, you know?

[A]

Well, it's car accident is what, like, screwed him.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

Shot with us.

[B]

Oh, a shot. Oh, my gosh.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

That's really kind of you. I suppose that there's no other Response other than thank you. Yeah. What's your name? All right, I'll let you talk.

[D]

This is the bar where we discovered Carabal.

[B]

This is the bar where they discovered that is Fireball. Oh, yeah.

[D]

This is the greatest bar.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, yeah. We've been coming here for a long time. We're old work friends. We started coming here in 2013, and because we came for the lobster Mac and cheese and the lamb sandwich, and literally every Friday for about, oh, shoot, I don't know, three, four years, we pissed off our boss because we would do like two, three hour lunches here and go back to the office and did a good job. He was fine with it as long as we invited him with. And so we actually started coming here. A couple friends of ours worked here. Samantha Edwards, she actually passed away a few years ago unexpectedly. But she was one of the best servers here ever, and we ended up coming back for her as well. So it was Fireball, Mac and cheese and Samantha Edwards.

[B]

That's wonderful. How is the company? I'm guessing not around anymore.

[A]

Yeah, I'm guessing that you guys don't have a lot of KPI.

[E]

I mean, in a different job. We do, yeah. But, yeah, the KPIs. No, that. That company's no longer around.

[A]

But how did that happen? I don't.

[E]

Not because of us. We still got our job done.

[A]

We left long before that company was gone.

[C]

But.

[D]

But no, we came in. I came in here one day, and we're having a rough day, and I was like, you know Steve, the bartender at the time? I was like, I need a shot. I need something new.

[A]

I'm.

[D]

I've done every shot possible. What do you got? And he gives me a shot of Fireball. And I was like, man, what. How did you mix this? He's like, no, no, this is a new drink. And so that's where we discovered.

[A]

What year was that?

[E]

2013.

[D]

2013.

[B]

Yeah, 2013. They've been here ripping fireballs, doing.

[C]

Well.

[A]

When you guys were telling the story, it sounded like it was gonna end that you guys are now married.

[E]

So another funny story. For a long time, because we both are married to different people. Probably the first year they. Because we came in here every Friday, they assumed we were sp. And we had to correct them. Yeah, right. Just bar spouses. Not real spouses.

[B]

Spouses.

[E]

Yeah. And over the years, I guess we just kept coming back. I mean, now we're completely different jobs, raising our kids, married, but we always find our way back here, even if it's not on a Friday, so.

[B]

What a beautiful story. We got bar buddies here.

[A]

Did you rehearse that? That felt like.

[E]

What's that?

[A]

That sounded like, like you, like, had that written out and planned.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You're sit coming up here with your bar husband. You know, we've heard about a work hu. But a bar husband's a whole new thing.

[E]

We're great friends. I mean, we just developed something over time, and he had kids way before I did, so he was kind of a mentor for me and kind of helping shape me as a mom. And, you know, we're both Christians, so we really enjoy having those conversations here over, you know, like I said, lobster Mac and cheese and fireball beer and kind of connect with each other.

[B]

Are you sure you're not Catholic?

[E]

Oh, yeah, we are.

[B]

Yeah. See, I knew that I could sniff that one out.

[A]

They're drinking fireball on a Tuesday.

[B]

I know you think they were, Luther. During Holy Week. During Holy Week, Yeah. They're not Amish.

[E]

Nothing wrong with that. If I could build something like a table like the Amish, I'd be totally down with that.

[A]

Well, in public relations, by the way.

[E]

No, I don't. I work as a recruiter.

[B]

Okay, well, real good.

[A]

I. Well, I want you to recruit Charlie and I to work for you guys. I want to. We want to hear your spiel. Yeah, let's get Charlie and I. We didn't make it in the podcast industry. We're on the job market. We're looking for something. Something. What's your. What's your spiel?

[E]

Back to the 1029. You're gonna hear a lot of stories. What about what's our dude that passed away?

[D]

Larry.

[E]

Larry. He was a bar staple here, man.

[A]

I don't know if I want to be friends with you guys. There's a lot of everything.

[B]

How many people are dying in this bar?

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[E]

He was a lot older.

[A]

He was 98.

[B]

Did he ever bring a laptop to the bar, by a chance?

[E]

I don't think so.

[D]

I don't think he knew what a laptop was.

[B]

How about a pencil and paper?

[E]

I think he just did pull tabs and drink vodka.

[B]

All right. See, a fella that age, he doesn't even give a. What other people.

[A]

I'm gonna be honest, though, Charlie in retirement, that just sounds like you.

[B]

Just. Thanks. That's where. That's where I'm headed. I think I might own a bar one day.

[D]

Miles, you can be here every day. It's a great day drinking bar.

[B]

That's great.

[A]

That's what we're picking up on.

[B]

This is a productive work day for you guys. Where do you recruit for?

[E]

I'm not going to.

[B]

She don't want to say.

[A]

So, okay, who would you rather have? Who would you rather recruit, me or Charlie?

[E]

Wow, that's a loaded question. I mean, I feel like you guys come as a team, so I'd probably have to save all from Minnesota.

[B]

All right, all right, all right.

[D]

Well, cheesehead.

[E]

Okay, well, then I got to go with Minnesota.

[B]

Miles has a lake house in Minnesota.

[A]

I live in Fargo, North Dakota. Yeah, right there. No, we could interview as a team. Kind of like step brothers.

[B]

Yeah, that could be good. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you bring the persistence and the memory.

[A]

We have three questions. How much PTO can we get? What's the starting salary?

[B]

And we already know we can drink on the job.

[A]

And we already know we can drink on the job, so that one we don't even need to ask.

[D]

Podcast in recruiting.

[E]

What?

[B]

You're in podcast recruiting?

[E]

Oh, my word.

[B]

Oh, that's the truth. I can tell because he was like,

[E]

I know who they are. We should go talk to them. Let's bring him shots of Fireball. I was like, okay, let's go.

[A]

Oh, so you. You don't know the podcast at all?

[E]

When I walked in and I saw you sitting here, I was like, I think I know this person. Like, I feel like I know this person, but I wasn't sure. And then he was like, yeah. And then he got me on the bandwagon, so I'm like, that's Charlie Miles.

[D]

They'll let us on if we buy them shots, right?

[B]

That's hilarious.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, I mean, we didn't really have a choice. That's. That's what we call the Midwest bribes. Yeah, the military does it. They say if you can do 10 pull ups, we'll give you like a. A free bag with the US army

[B]

on it, you know? Oh, really?

[A]

They get you in there?

[B]

That's how that.

[C]

That's there.

[B]

You know what I'm talking gateway drug right there.

[A]

You guys gotta consider a pull up station. Take a page out of the U.S. army.

[B]

Well, you know, there's gotta be a strong pipe around here somewhere. Go give it a go.

[E]

Yeah, I don't know.

[B]

Yeah, that one right there, that double deck.

[A]

Appropriate question, but are any of these yours up there?

[B]

Obviously, no.

[E]

We usually leave by 3pm so we don't have to deal with the shenanigans. Other than the meat raffle on Friday. Sometimes we've stayed for that he's won some meat. He doesn't need any more meat, but he's won some meat.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No further questions.

[A]

Your meat guy, what kind of meats we talking?

[E]

Try his ribs. He's like one competition one.

[A]

I'm gonna be honest. Like, if anyone in this bar I'm taking rib advice from, it's gonna be you.

[B]

You look like a rib guy.

[A]

You look like a rib guy. Don't.

[D]

Don't take advice from skinny chef.

[B]

Right.

[D]

Which, by the way, Miles, you're losing too much weight, man.

[C]

I don't like.

[B]

That's what I keep telling them.

[C]

I know.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Now you. Now you look like you belong in Minneapolis.

[A]

So what's funny is. So what's funny is you're pressing on all my insecurities now, which is funny because most people get insecure about how fat they are, me doing what I do. I'm now insecure that I've lost too much weight, which is kind of a reverse insecurity here.

[D]

Admit I lost a little respect for you. The skinnier you get.

[B]

Damn.

[F]

I don't like it.

[B]

I love how you just told him your insecurity and he doubled down on it.

[A]

Keeps going.

[B]

He was like, absolutely. Yeah.

[A]

Well, here's the thing. I got a kid now, and I'd like to see him graduate high school, you know, so that's overrated.

[E]

So let's be honest. And he's seen him graduate. He's got a Gracie. You're one that graduated college. He's got awesome kids, man. And an awesome wife.

[B]

Well, that's awesome. And we thank you guys for coming over here and just giving us the insight on this bar. Seems like a great, beautiful, community oriented topless bar. And we are after three. After 3pm that's what you said. You can only take your bra off after 3pm, huh? Or it's a closing time bar thing.

[E]

I think it's a closing time thing.

[B]

How do you not know the bar rule here? Who's fucking Frank, by the way?

[D]

She doesn't. She doesn't normally wear bras, so that's the problem.

[B]

Well, you know, you should listen more to your PR person.

[A]

I didn't help.

[D]

My bra is the biggest one up there.

[B]

Oh, that's black one over there.

[D]

That was mine.

[E]

The bro.

[A]

The bro.

[B]

The bro. That's wonderful. That's great. Well, yeah, I'm not even gonna follow up with, how do you know she doesn't wear a bra all the time? I'm just.

[A]

You just aren't helping your cause all the Listeners are thinking that you guys are a couple, and then you say something like that.

[E]

10:29 is honestly the best thing in northeast Minneapolis.

[D]

I've traveled all over the world.

[E]

We've been to.

[D]

This is the best bar in the world right here.

[A]

Because she said just in northeast Minneapolis. You said world.

[B]

He's like, we've traveled to Mankato, Rochester. This is the best Brainerd.

[A]

We've been to Brainerd.

[B]

Any bar in Wisconsin better than any bar in Wisconsin. Shots, fire, dude meat, raffles.

[D]

We got pull tabs. The 1029, we got bras on the ceiling. This is the best bar in the world right here.

[B]

All right, well, that. You heard it right here, folks. Get on over to 1029, wear two bras if you come, or no bra. And either way, it'll be fun.

[D]

Love what you're doing, guys.

[B]

Thank you. We'll see you guys soon. Watch for deer. I forgot. I'm in antibiotics.

[A]

Also.

[B]

I'm on antibiotics. Oh, well,

[A]

you got one shot of Fireball and antibiotics.

[B]

Sure you can. Yeah, you can probably have a couple. Actually, for legal reasons, I'm gonna backtrack that and say you're not. You should never drink on antibiotics, period. End of discussion.

[A]

That's the thing with antibiotics.

[B]

That's what they said. That's what freaking.

[A]

Well, then I have disobeyed that before in my life.

[B]

I have, too. But, you know, as we get older,

[A]

you get the fucking Z back in you. But day three, you start feeling good, you head to the bar, even though you got two days left on it. Come on, Charles. Hey, how many days into the Z pack?

[B]

Just started. Probably contagious. Don't. Don't.

[A]

That's all right. My kids got croup, so.

[B]

Oh, you see, we're probably both. In fact, let's make out later and get a vaccine for the year, shall we?

[A]

Yeah, let's do it.

[B]

All right. So we only make out. I'll just look up my finger and put in your mouth.

[A]

You know what I love about our fans, Chuck? They don't give up, Is they just. They're so comfortable telling you how much they don't respect you to your face.

[B]

I know. That was wild, Miles.

[A]

That felt good.

[B]

Miles, you were. You are perfect just the way you are. Okay. Feel the need to say that.

[A]

Isn't that wild, though? Like, oh, yeah, I started losing weight and I got self conscious about the fact that I was less fat. That's never happened in the world ever.

[B]

Well, listen, Miles, I hear you, and I feel you and if it makes you feel any better, I get people talking shit to my face all the time.

[A]

What do they say? Like, oh, you're just too cute.

[B]

No, I was in a. I wish

[A]

you had less muscles.

[B]

I was in a Fleet farm and this woman was there and she said hello and wanted a picture. And after the picture, she looks at the picture and she goes, you look unwell. And I was like, we're in a Fleet farm. The lighting in a Fleet farm is not flattering. She's talking about my dark circles. I was like. And then she said she's a nurse.

[A]

Is that a clinical thing, the dark circles? Or is it just bad lifestyle you look at?

[B]

It probably has to do with taking shots on antibiotics, but if you look at my family, you can see that it runs. Yeah. And it's a style choice. Some people message me and they say, hey, I'm painting my under eyes dark so I can look more like you.

[A]

Yeah, it's like eyeshadow.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

You got a natural eyeshadow. It's like Derek Carr looks like he's always wearing eyeliner. You just look like you always have eyeshadow on and you just got done crying.

[B]

Yeah, right, I do look like I just got done. Somebody, I did a video and somebody said, this guy looks like he just got done having a three way coke bender with a bass and a walleye. I've got that hanging on my fridge. Dude, it was so good.

[C]

I don't even know what that means.

[B]

I don't know what it means either, but I thought it was brilliant. But yeah, and then people say I look like I'm crying. I don't shed tears for you.

[A]

When was the last time you shed a tear, Chuck?

[B]

Oh, dude, it's been decades. You know, we just push it deep, deep down.

[A]

It's been decades and you're not even 40.

[B]

Well, I, I didn't say it's been. I don't even know what comes after a decade. I've been alive decades, Miles. Do the math. No, I shed some tears from time to time, you know.

[A]

No, you don't.

[B]

It's healthy, Miles. It's healthy for everyone to cry. You guys get out there and when you look in the mirror, just shed a tear. Kind of see if you can do it.

[A]

It's tough.

[B]

I've cried for films before.

[A]

Miles, what's the key to crying on film?

[B]

Oh, man. So like, if you push everything in your life down for years and years and years, you've got encyclopedia of triggers. You can be like, let's Pull up. See here? Is 1998 gonna do it? No, nothing there.

[A]

What are the asses here?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Sisters now. No care about them.

[B]

Let's go to the first marriage. All right, that might work.

[A]

That might work. The book of crying triggers.

[B]

Yeah, it's good. You know, you gotta have those. You gotta think about the sibling that you like the most, then think about them dying, you know?

[A]

What do you. What would happen if you thought about the sibling that you like the least dying?

[B]

Oh, I've tried it. I'm like, well,

[A]

we could.

[B]

I'll send flowers.

[A]

Do you, in your mind, have a sibling you like the least? Be honest.

[B]

No, I do. I for sure.

[A]

Watching.

[B]

Oh, I for sure do. It just changes all the time.

[A]

Oh, nice.

[B]

I mean, it's very transactional, my family's relationship. Very Transaction in what sense? In that I like the person the most who did me a favor most recently.

[A]

Yeah. If everyone had just come to your cabin. Everyone loves you or hates you, I guess.

[B]

No, they. They. Yeah, they. I don't know. I'm. I'm sure that I'd have to think about it. You know, A lot of times I just let things breeze right over me. I'm like, all right, well, whatever, you know, but it's like.

[G]

It's like NFL power rankings. They change every single day for no reason.

[B]

Exactly. It is like NFL power. You. Thank you, Jared. That's a wonderful analogy.

[A]

You are not too many siblings away from, like, filling out a whole NFL power rankings.

[B]

For sure. Do that, dude. Let's see if my mom and dad.

[A]

You have a top 10 power rankings for siblings and you. And that means you have to leave a couple off, Right? Don't make the top 10.

[B]

We have enough for an entire NFL team plus a sub. I mean, that's, you know, because they can play. They have to play both sides of the ball.

[A]

But, yeah, you could. You could feel the football team.

[B]

We're like a small town football team, you know?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

9. Man, you got a deep bench.

[B]

You sure do. Hell, yeah. Did you ever play a team in football that, like, didn't have enough for both sides of the ball? So they.

[A]

I was mostly like a summer camp. We would, like, get paired up with, like. Like one time. One time we played a Canadian team that. For whatever high school Canadian team that was at a camp in Fargo.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And was. So we had to play with 12.

[B]

Oh, really?

[A]

Yeah, we just didn't really know what to do with an extra guy.

[B]

Yeah. What'd they do? Just really free safety guy. Chilling back There. The freest safety, Just the goal line defender. Just in case anyone breaks.

[A]

We got a free safety, a freer safety, and a freest safety.

[B]

I suppose it would just be blitzing all the time for that free man, you know? Although they have 12 too, so that doesn't necessarily work. Yeah. Yeah. Well, Miles, anything else on your mind before we take some callers there?

[A]

I do have to mention that this bar has a cash back.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Promo. Like it's a hardware store.

[B]

That's amazing.

[A]

You buy a. You buy a beer, you scan that QR code, you get two bucks back.

[B]

That is really wild.

[A]

If you got $2 back on a bush light, they just would be free.

[B]

Yeah, it would just be. I don't know what. Oh, you gotta scan a code.

[A]

It's like basically a mail in rebate.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like, send us your proof of purchase.

[A]

What was that?

[F]

No one knew something, you know, like, who's gonna do their Home Depot card? Like, scan it?

[A]

Yeah, no one's gonna do that. But it looks good for them because they're giving your money back.

[B]

Oh, really? Are you the. The beer salesman here?

[F]

I live right across the street, so I'm always here.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

That's a wonderful mustache. My God. Did you.

[A]

How long does it take you every morning to. To curl the stash?

[B]

Oh, what kind of fertilizer have you been using on that? Earwax. That's good. That's really incredible. Wow. The ladies like it.

[A]

Thigh tickler.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah, they're like the little antennas like that an ant has, you know?

[B]

Yeah. Can you feel the tips of the mustache? No. Okay. No feeling in here.

[A]

That was a really dumb question, Chuck.

[B]

No, it wasn't. Because I think when you take it to that level, you might be able to.

[A]

Are you feeling that right now?

[B]

Yeah, I am feeling it, actually.

[A]

So there is.

[B]

What? Yeah, your elbow's. The wenis. Yeah.

[A]

There's no feeling in it.

[B]

There's no feeling in your wenis.

[A]

No. Yeah.

[B]

Let me pinch your weakness. I can feel that. I can feel that.

[C]

That hurts.

[B]

Yeah, see, he's.

[A]

He.

[B]

He said it's a. Stop pinching me. He said it's a joke.

[A]

No, actually, there's not. There's very few nerve endings in it.

[B]

That's where the funny bone is.

[A]

Pinch it. I don't feel that.

[B]

You don't feel it?

[A]

No.

[B]

You don't feel that at all. You felt it. You just want to be a big old man. Yeah,

[C]

I got.

[A]

I can't find your way.

[B]

Yeah. Find My.

[A]

It's just so small.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You can't feel that, can you?

[B]

No, not really. Are you really going after.

[A]

I was going after it.

[B]

Cool. Man notes. No.

[A]

Marley.

[B]

Marley. Dude. Nice meeting you. My mom was a hippie. Does she like.

[A]

I was gonna ask you that, but I was like, that's too obvious. But.

[B]

Honored your grandpa with it. And your wife, She's a fan. Oh, no wife. Multiple girlfriends. Good for you, Marley. My God.

[A]

Do you actually have multiple girlfriends?

[B]

Come on over.

[A]

Come on over. Welcome. Belly on up to the podcast.

[B]

Yeah. Grab a chair here. You want this chair here? Yeah, you sit right here. Sit right here in the middle. Yeah. Oh, you don't want chair. You want to stand. All right. No one touched my wien is though, right, Marley? Apparently a lot of people are touching your way.

[A]

Marley. He lives next door to the bar.

[F]

Allegedly.

[A]

Allegedly.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

He says that he has multiple girlfriends.

[F]

Allegedly.

[B]

Okay, and how does that work? Are you on a rotation? Are you.

[F]

Well, it's a block schedule, so, you know, three days one time, three days the other week, you know?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah. Kind of like divorced parents, right?

[F]

Right. Yeah.

[A]

50 custody.

[B]

Do you.

[F]

I like more than the other, but.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Do you clear the roster every week before Christmas and week before Valentine's Day?

[F]

I gotta work overtime on holidays.

[B]

Oh, yeah. That's a lot of presents to get. Who's your favorite?

[A]

You can just make up a trick question.

[F]

Jennifer.

[B]

Jennifer. Nice.

[A]

What do you like about Jennifer? What does Jennifer have that Shania doesn't?

[B]

Tits. Okay. Wow.

[A]

So which one of these bras is Jennifer's? Bras on the ceiling.

[F]

Yes. You guys missed the big one over there. See that big grande over there? Yeah. That's a water balloon launcher over there.

[C]

Is that.

[A]

Is that a real bra? Actually wore that triple Z's, you think

[B]

or what that live? Well, could hold a walleye Miles.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Record walleye.

[B]

Holy smoke.

[A]

So that's.

[F]

That's a musky bro.

[A]

That's Jennifer.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

I mean, allegedly.

[B]

All right, well, that's good. How long you been coming to this bar?

[F]

First day, actually.

[B]

It's your first day here?

[F]

No, I'm just kidding.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[F]

I swear.

[B]

So what do you.

[F]

Heck no.

[A]

What do you do for a living?

[F]

I'm a chef. Whereas we're for senior living care now, actually take care of old, old people.

[B]

That's awesome.

[F]

For 28 years.

[A]

So you know how to really work a blender then?

[F]

Yeah, we have a couple blended foods. Yeah. Only one, though.

[B]

So how many of your gals have you picked up at the senior Living center.

[F]

Well, allegedly none yet, but.

[B]

Okay. All right. You know, there you go. You know, seniors, I've. I did a comedy show in a senior living couple of them. And you are a hot commodity when you walk in there and you're under 60.

[F]

Well, obviously. I mean, it's a good place to pick up chicks.

[B]

Oh, yeah. And wills.

[A]

Yeah, most of them. Most of them are single and they got a will.

[F]

There's a couple that lives there and they be banging this still.

[B]

So how do you know that, Marley?

[F]

Allegedly. Allegedly. I don't.

[B]

But are they coming in, telling you about last night's escapades? He dropped a spoon in the ice bucket.

[A]

Like a conjugal visit at a prison, you know?

[F]

No, no, there's free roaming. They pay a lot of money to stay in that thing.

[B]

How much?

[F]

Allegedly.

[A]

So they're like free range chickens is what you're saying? Yeah, got it.

[B]

What's. What's the pickup game like? Are they all trying to. Trying to.

[F]

Shuffleboard's a big pickup game.

[B]

Is it?

[A]

Yeah, they're not doing basketball anymore. No.

[B]

Hey, if you can get in there and own a game of shuffleboard, that's a turn on. How about bridge? They're doing some of that.

[F]

That canasta is a good one.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[F]

What's the game that you guys play in Wisconsin?

[B]

She pad. Euchre.

[F]

Euchre. That's what I'm thinking of.

[B]

Yeah, Bridge. Bridge. Cribbage.

[F]

Cribbage, yeah, sure. After the podcast, I'll beat one of you guys ass cribbage if y' all play.

[B]

Oh, wow.

[F]

Game right in here.

[B]

Do. Yeah, right here.

[F]

I'll grab it here, hold up,

[A]

I got two mics. One for me and one for Marley. Marley and me.

[B]

Marley and me. There you go. Miles, have you ever played cribbage?

[A]

I have.

[B]

All right.

[A]

Not very good at it.

[B]

Nice, dude.

[A]

So did you bring that or is that the bars?

[F]

Nicer board. So we used to use that one cards in there, cuz I count them most of the time, so.

[B]

Oh, three way here.

[A]

What's the wildest you've seen at the senior home?

[F]

I just started, so nothing too crazy yet.

[A]

Where were you working before that, Mr. Paul?

[F]

Supper Club in Adina. It's like a cream supper club. And then Grandview Lodge up north.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I know. Grandview Lodge.

[B]

Hell yeah. Well, that's right.

[A]

What's your signature dish? If you had to. If you had a.

[F]

The worst question ever to ask a chef.

[A]

Yeah, it's.

[B]

Oh, hang on, let me Just. There you go.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

It's like the worst question. Ask a chef. What's your. What's your favorite joke you like to tell?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Or.

[A]

Or just tell me a joke. That's the worst question.

[B]

How do you make your favorite dish? It's like. Oh, God.

[F]

With flavor.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, so never mind. I'll go myself. It's fine.

[F]

I'll touch your wenus though.

[B]

Thank you very much.

[A]

Are you touching it? I can't feel that.

[B]

See? I know. It's pretty impressive. What do you do when you're not cooking and not here?

[F]

I'm sleeping.

[B]

Okay. Eat, sleep, cook, drink.

[F]

This says eat, sleep, drink.

[B]

You're doing all the functionality of it. I like that. That's wonderful. What do you want out of life?

[F]

That's a trick. That's a good question. What do I want in life?

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

To be happy.

[B]

To be happy.

[F]

I'm happy, I guess.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

You're good. Well, that's good. If you were looking, you obviously haven't found your ideal lady yet. So if you were doing.

[F]

Allegedly.

[A]

One minute. What makes you drop all your girlfriends and wife a gal up?

[C]

What?

[A]

What does she need?

[F]

$10 million.

[B]

Okay, well, five million.

[F]

We'll go five.

[B]

Five.

[A]

Nursing. Nursing home. It one is the place to be then.

[B]

Yeah. You're. You're already off to a good step. You're working at a high paying nurse nursing home. Are you at the top tier nursing home here in town?

[C]

It's pretty nice.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. All right.

[F]

I pay a lot of money, so

[B]

how much per month?

[F]

They pay a lot. I mean, I can't divulge that information. I signed up. No clause though.

[B]

Oh, you signed an NDA? Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

You ever signed one of those?

[B]

No.

[A]

I'll sign anything you put in front of me. So.

[B]

Yes, I have my boat. Wow.

[A]

I'll sign your upper butt cheek titty. Oh, yeah. I've signed titties before and I'm not talking about titties. Only man titties. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

Sorry, ladies.

[A]

Yeah. Not because I wouldn't. It's because I've never been offered that. It's only been guys.

[F]

How about a girl wearing that bra? If you were just signing. I mean, big marker.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Spray paint.

[B]

No, it's just a longer message. You can write.

[A]

You can throw your graffiti tag on that.

[B]

Yeah, no, that's important.

[F]

You graffiti something before, haven't you?

[A]

No, I'm a clean guy.

[B]

What have you graffiti, Marley?

[F]

This bathroom in there.

[B]

Would you write allegedly?

[F]

Allegedly.

[B]

What'd you write?

[F]

Rip to Larry. Larry. This hat right here.

[A]

Oh, I thought you were talking about.

[F]

No, Larry used to be a swamper. Here, it's for Larry.

[B]

That's Larry's Stormy Cromer. Nice. So you honored him in the bathroom? Bathroom, yeah, yeah. And outside out there, you just wrote Rip Larry.

[F]

Rip Larry.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[F]

Anthony that died. I read P.R. anthony in there. Eric Dunbar outside the front door, there's a Sharpie that says, Trey loves Larry.

[A]

That's funny.

[B]

That's cool.

[A]

I thought when you said that you graffiti the bathroom, I thought you meant the toilet.

[F]

No, no, no, I didn't. Poop. Costco.

[B]

That thing. Yeah.

[A]

I thought you were painting the ceramic.

[F]

Yes.

[B]

Whose friend also, he just.

[A]

He just named another like four or five people that died that come to this bar.

[B]

Oh, that's true.

[A]

They were talking about different people that died.

[B]

We're at. We're not in a bar. Where.

[A]

Stay here.

[B]

We're in a Mazole, you know, young.

[F]

Yeah, we got 34.

[B]

Yeah, we'll go with that.

[A]

I am 33.

[B]

Maths hard 33.

[A]

I just turned 33.

[B]

I'm 38. Bird 38.

[F]

43, believe it or not.

[B]

No, you come on now.

[F]

1982, baby.

[B]

Damn. You look like you're 28. Look at you. Ah, there it is. There it is.

[F]

Right?

[A]

You kind of got a Teddy Swims vibe. Anyone ever told you that?

[F]

Tattoos though.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[F]

My boy saying. And I don't get paid like them.

[B]

Who is Frank?

[A]

I. I didn't say. You are Teddy.

[F]

Frank's used to work here as a bartender and.

[B]

Okay, cool.

[F]

He's on his 60th birthday here, so.

[B]

Got it. I thought Frank will be here probably

[F]

at some point, hopefully, so.

[B]

All right, nice.

[F]

We'll get Frank on this.

[B]

Well, that's great. This is wonderful. Well, you've already done it like this. Yeah, no, that's great help.

[A]

This should help.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

That's a mute guy. How do you guys feel about Rumpelman's?

[B]

I'm on antibiotics. I already took a shot. I forgot I was on antibiotics.

[C]

So.

[F]

What's that mean?

[B]

It means I'm not supposed to drink, according to the pharmacist.

[F]

What's that? High life then.

[B]

Well, I forgot.

[F]

Highlights are fine. Well, it's a champagne appears, you know.

[B]

Yeah. He didn't say anything about it. He.

[A]

No, he.

[B]

I forgot.

[A]

He forgot. He ordered that when he had allegedly forgot.

[B]

I forgot.

[A]

We'll pass some coffee cup.

[B]

That's. No, it's tea. That's how you know.

[G]

Sorry.

[F]

It's a teacup.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

Okay.

[B]

Tea and honey. It's supposed to help my throat, so.

[F]

You're like, so many jokes.

[A]

Yeah, I didn't want to ask. I didn't want to ask about the antibiotics. I didn't know what it was for.

[B]

Strap, you have strep throat. No, I don't have strep throat. I used to. I don't know what I had.

[A]

Should you be here right now?

[B]

No, but we don't have.

[A]

That's my mic.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

Oh, I'm sorry.

[B]

Here, I'll trade you. No, I don't have Strap, and I'm. I'm fine. Plus, you also said you had gangry fever or something like that.

[A]

No, my kids got croup.

[B]

What the. What is that? I should ask the foot.

[F]

Mouth.

[A]

No, it's upper respiratory infection.

[B]

Croup group uri.

[A]

The reason why is. Yeah. Anyways, their. Their airway is so small with croup, you got to be worried about it closing.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

Even though it would just be a normal cold for you and I.

[B]

Okay, got it. All right. Anyways, well, wish him the best.

[A]

Well, Marley, we appreciate it.

[B]

Thanks, Molly. Glad that you appreciate you coming on, man. Watch for deer in here. Maybe we'll get a little cribbage game going to. You're gonna lose shortly here. Yeah.

[A]

Thank you, sir. All right. All right, you take a caller.

[B]

Let's do it, guys. We are back here with our good buddy Russell Nicolette. Hey, Russell, let's say you could change any law, okay? Because, you know, you're. You're an injury attorney. What's the one law that you're just like, ah. Why does that have to be a law? You know, maybe it's like getting records or something or, you know, like, I don't know. Or like, you know, they. They. They always like, here's one. Why is the person who, you know, rams you from the behind. Why is. Why are you on the hook for 10 still, you know?

[H]

Well, and technically you're not. But that's what the insurance companies try

[A]

to say, like, there we go.

[B]

See, this is why we got them on the podcast. Yeah. You're not.

[A]

No, you're not. You're not.

[H]

Like, they. The insurance companies try to spread this rumor that basically you being on the road, that you're somewhat percentage at fault, but really to be at fault, you have to be doing something that is outside the scope of, you know, your normal responsibilities. And being on the road is not right. You're on the road doing something normal.

[B]

But they.

[H]

They like to say, hey, Charlie, you know you got rear ended by that guy. You're at least 10% fault. Like for what? Like it would be different if maybe

[A]

your brake lights were out or something. Right.

[H]

But that's not what they're saying. They're saying you're. Because you were there.

[B]

Yeah, that always sounded like bullshit to me. And you're telling me it's bullshit.

[H]

Your bullshit detector was right.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

But.

[B]

But I believe them. And that goes back to that Russell Sage dude. We were talking. Or they.

[A]

Jerry Spence.

[B]

Jerry Spencer. I really screwed up the name, dude. Russell Sage. Hey, that could be a good.

[C]

That you could be like.

[B]

You could be Jerry Sage's son. Yeah, well, Jerry Spence, to let everyone know, it started off with Jerry Spencer's previous episode.

[A]

Jerry Michael Jordan of lawyering.

[B]

Michael Jordan of Warren. I was calling him Jerry Sage there when I brought him up here today. I was trying to go for the. The joke by calling him the wrong name again. Little callback for you. Longtime listeners ended up using Russell's first name. So I think they got it. Well, I just wanted to catch everyone up as to why it was funny. Miles. Sometimes I like to explain my own failed jokes. Anyways, I don't know why I brought him up.

[H]

I got a wrestling name now. Russell Sage. It's my new wrestling name. If like I ever get in a WWE or something cool.

[B]

And you just walk out there with two like burning sages, you know, just like.

[C]

I thought you're gonna say lots.

[A]

Really intimidating, Charlie.

[B]

It kind of is, dude. Because you're like, what are you?

[C]

You're.

[A]

You're about to rid of demons.

[B]

You're getting rid of demons. You're about to enter the demon. You know, I. I could see it, dude. I can see it.

[A]

Yeah.

[H]

I just might get. I just might get beat up by the actual wrestlers. I see when they see me holding the sage and they're like, you know what?

[A]

Yeah. I mean I have a whole. I have a whole WWE personality that I invented called the Litigator. I like that. When I just. What was it again, Jared? I end up my. Fine. My finishing move is I knock them out and then they have to sign a document and it's all case by case, you know.

[H]

So are you dressed in a suit or what?

[A]

I think it was. And like my. My weapon of choice is a briefcase. A lead filled.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

Yeah.

[H]

You could use a gavel too, I suppose. But that, you know, that's more of a judge.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So yeah, I'm just.

[A]

I'm the litigator.

[B]

So. Yeah.

[A]

Nothing scarier than getting caught up in litigation. You know that.

[B]

That's true.

[H]

It's much scarier and tougher than a guy walking out with two save.

[B]

Well, you know, you guys aren't sharing my vision right now. He's not doing like this. He's like. And these are big sage bushels, man. You lights him with a blowtorch. All right, so just maybe if I

[H]

had the eyes like the undertaker or something, like, so I look kind of demonic or something that make it.

[A]

That sell it. That would help with the litigator.

[H]

Be something scared of that or not.

[A]

Oh, no. I mean, litigator, he's got the long arm of the law.

[B]

He's not worried about. Yeah, he's pretty true.

[H]

I kind of wish I was a litigator.

[A]

Like, I. Yeah, I mean, you could be the side. You could be your sidekick. The sage tag team. You could be. What is the. You could be the scribe. Scribe.

[B]

The Esquire.

[A]

Yeah, the Litigator and the Esquire. So where can the folks find you?

[C]

Yeah.

[H]

Nicolay law.com or 1855, Nicole

[A]

right. Charlie. We have a new sponsor on this podcast, and that is Shady Rays.

[B]

I'm excited, guys.

[A]

I. We actually have no idea what glasses are in these, so we're going to take them off and put them on.

[B]

All right, let's do it. I'm excited.

[A]

This is what we call sunglasses roulette. Oh, yeah, you got the Blues Brothers ones.

[B]

Oh, no, dude, these lenses are way too clean. What's wrong with these? Guys, send them back.

[C]

You look good.

[A]

Out of mind luck.

[B]

You look really good. Those are kind of like the. The futuristic aviators. You look like you should be flying. And Top Gun with a video game controller or something.

[A]

Top Gun. I love Top Gun.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

These are a couple of Shady Ray sunglasses. What I like about these.

[B]

Charlie, what do you like about my.

[A]

They don't cost 200 bucks.

[B]

No, they don't.

[A]

They got the same quality as those $200 one.

[B]

They feel $200 to me. Oh, these are polarized, dude. That's gonna be.

[A]

See all the fish fish on in the water there?

[B]

Yeah. That's great, dude. That's what you always need, polarized sun goggles when you're out there, fly fishing. So you see those salmon just sitting there. Otherwise they disappear.

[A]

You know, podcasting with sunglasses on is kind of a vibe. We might have to do an episode with the Shady Rays on.

[B]

You think so?

[A]

And I think they look good. Charlie, you like them, Jared?

[B]

Love them.

[A]

Who looks. Who looks hotter in These sunglasses.

[G]

Yeah, I'd say Charlie.

[A]

Damn it.

[B]

Yes, Jared, that's what's up, dude. Thank you.

[A]

Is it the style or my face? Is there something I can do about it?

[G]

I think it's your face.

[B]

Oh, bummer. I think you look really good in those mouths. Right?

[A]

Thanks. Thanks, Chuck.

[B]

Be careful when you put those on. If you go out with Ann, she's gonna be upset by all the lad

[A]

coming up a stick and fend him off.

[B]

Bring a stick with you? Yes. Bring your kid. Be like, I'm taking, I'm taking.

[A]

So you guys want some. Some good shades like Charlie and I got for the. The high quality stuff for not the high quality price. You got to go to Shady Ray's website and use code bellied up. Charlie, I want you to just hold on for a second. Guess how much percent off two or more polarized sunglasses you get with code bellied up 2. 40. Code bellied up for 40% off two or more polarized glasses.

[B]

And then if I.

[A]

So these we could have got 40% off.

[B]

And on top of that, they feel like $200 glasses. And they're only cheaper than that. And then you get 40. I mean, I can't really do math, but at this point it's insane.

[A]

So, guys, go check out Shady Rays high quality glasses for a great price. Plus the Charlie looks hot in them.

[B]

Thank you. Buy one, get two, because that's nice because I lose glasses all the time, so I'm gonna do that right after this.

[A]

Check them out. Charlie, you got your brunt hat on.

[B]

Yes, I do. I got my brunt hat on. I got. Oh, you got brunt on your arm. Look at that.

[A]

That's my sweatshirt. I just got this one. I actually feel this sucker. Oh, sick. It is so nice.

[B]

That is nice. You got an extra one here.

[A]

You know, a sweatshirt's nice. I was on a road trip today to get here and I wore it on the road trip. My comfy cozies.

[B]

You wear your comfy cozy in the car, don't you? Yeah, I like wearing comfy cozies in the car.

[A]

That sweatshirt is so comfortable.

[B]

Are these your company?

[A]

I chose it as my road trip sweatshirt.

[B]

Wow. No kidding.

[C]

And.

[B]

But you know, it can go right from a road trip to the job site, just nothing.

[A]

And I like it because it's like great spring sweatshirt. It's a little bit lighter weight.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And. But it's also going to be durable enough to wear on the job site.

[B]

And it's perfect for sprinter when you don't really know, I mean, I'm sure you could pull through a cold day with that hoodie on, no problem. But it's. It's like a great, you know, 28 degrees to 58 degree kind of sweatshirt right there.

[A]

Yeah, I. You've been using your work boots at the lake cabin, I've heard.

[B]

I've been using them at the lake. I've been using them and my basement and you know, Miles, for me, projects take a long time because I have a lot of side quest projects. So I'm bird watching. Bird watching. Yeah. But also, you take down one wall and you're like, should I have taken down that wall?

[A]

Yeah, put it back up.

[B]

And then you're putting another wall back up. So I'm in the process of building a wall where I just took one down, but it's gonna be a better wall. It's gonna be a better wall.

[A]

And no better way to do it than in your Brunt boots.

[B]

Absolutely. And they're so comfortable.

[A]

You're being them all day and you're like, other boots. My. My feet will hurt.

[B]

Yeah, but you can go right from the basement to bird watching and boom, boom.

[A]

I've walked without missing a step.

[B]

I've walked miles in those bird watches.

[A]

I'd love to walk a mile in your boots.

[B]

Someday they might be. Do they fit? Do we have the same size?

[A]

Probably not, but I'd still like to try it out.

[B]

Well, you're welcome anytime you want to take a Take a step in my shoes, Miles, you just come on over and I'll insert your foot. Okay.

[A]

Yeah. So, guys, if you want to check out Brunt Workwear, they got sweatshirts, they got. They got workwear pants we'll talk about on another podcast. They got the boots. Go to brunt workwear.com use code bellied up for 10 bucks off your order.

[B]

That's great. That's great. 10 bucks off. Guys, we are just printing money for you. Okay? Check it on out, folks. I'm on tour. We'll see on the road. Okay. Anywhere by miles. Yeah, we just did some shows in Minneapolis, and then I'm going to other cities like Denver and, you know, it'll be fun. Come on out. Okay, we're doing the east coast. Go to charliebarrons.com. i forget where we're going, but I know Charleston's in there. South Carolina. Okay, so Jake just saw a show. Jake gave it a thumbs up. It would have been awkward if he didn't, but anyways.

[C]

All right.

[B]

That's my shameless plug. See you guys, soon.

[A]

Hello?

[C]

Hello?

[A]

Is this Nate? Did you just fall over? Are you all right?

[C]

Dude, I. Did I fall over? If I fell over, then this is not gonna go well.

[B]

Are you in a kitchen or a bathroom or.

[C]

Dude, is the echo that bad? Hold on, hold on, hold on. Is it going through the right mic? I hope it is. I don't think it is.

[B]

Are you at your computer? Are you trying to record this?

[C]

Oh, absolutely not. This is recorded already. Why would I be trying to record it?

[B]

I don't know. You said, is it going to the right mic? Oh, from your phone or your iPods? Yeah, AirPods.

[C]

I'm trying not to get, like, an echo, but I feel that's not gonna happen.

[B]

Oh, you're good. It's fine. What's cooking, my man? Belly on up to the bar.

[C]

Oh, man. Mr. Barons. Is Mr. My place over there?

[A]

I'm right here. How we doing, Nate?

[C]

Yeah, dude, I barely heard you speak. Dude, I'm. Oh, man, I. I'm flabbergasted.

[A]

I was trying to figure out if you were my wife's cousin whose name is Nate, because you sound just like him, and I was kind of tripping. Tripping a little bit, but.

[C]

Oh, dude, I mean. I mean, I don't know what to say to that. Maybe I am. I'll. I'll contact some family members. We'll see what happens.

[A]

But, yeah, no, I'm here now. I'm here. So what's going on? Are you at work or. What's going on?

[C]

Oh, dude, I am at my apartment right now. I just got out of class. Well, senior design meetings, but, yeah, I'm not skipping out on work like most of your callers. Thank the Lord. Thank the Lord.

[A]

So how. Where are you going to school at?

[C]

I go to Central Michigan. It's in Central Michigan, believe it or not.

[A]

Really? Yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

What's the best part about going to Central Michigan?

[C]

I don't know. I don't really have an answer for you there.

[A]

Are you at Central Michigan because you couldn't get into the other schools or what?

[C]

I mean, I probably wouldn't have gotten into Michigan, but I got to accepted from Michigan State. I like the engineering programs they have here.

[A]

Okay, so you're gonna be an engineer?

[C]

That's the. That's the plan. That's the hope. If they'll take me. If they take me. Actually, no, that reminds me, Charlie. Add me back on LinkedIn, maybe I can get a job off of that.

[A]

You didn't Accept him on LinkedIn?

[B]

Add you back on LinkedIn?

[C]

Yeah, he added me on LinkedIn, bro.

[B]

I don't. I don't know that I've been on LinkedIn and.

[A]

Is LinkedIn like the new, like, Gen Z social media? You and Fernando, I mean, if you're

[C]

trying to get a job. If you're trying to get a job, I mean, Fernando knows best. You know, you go on LinkedIn, and, Charlie, let me just say, your resume is stacked, and I'd love to connect with you.

[B]

Am I still. Am I still, like, public on LinkedIn?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I don't know. I gotta. Look, I know I've, like, someone messaged me there not a few months ago who I knew, and I tried to get the login to get back in, and it took forever. So I think I gave up on it, or maybe I got back on it, but I gotta. I gotta take that thing down.

[C]

I mean, right now it says your experience is comedian. You've been. You've been doing that for eight years and 10 months. I don't know how true that is, but, you know, maybe you should work on your. Your stand up a little more. Yeah, you got.

[A]

He's got to beef up his bio is what you're saying.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I'm just not seeing much in the.

[A]

You got the key to the city. What's. What. What city did you get the keys to?

[B]

Man's Walk.

[A]

You got to put that in your LinkedIn.

[B]

I should put that in. It's a big key, too, so you can get in there.

[A]

You've thrown out the first pitch at a Brewers game. Put that in your LinkedIn.

[B]

That's true. That's true.

[A]

You sold out the Wisconsin State Fair. You got to put that in your LinkedIn bio.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

Well, listen, here's the real question. What's any of that gonna do me, though, Miles?

[A]

Connect with guys like Nate.

[B]

Nate, what do you want to connect on LinkedIn for?

[C]

You know, Dude, I mean, who knows? You know, for gm, they might see that. They might be like, man, we really need this guy. Like, he's. He's connected with Charlie Barons.

[F]

This guy.

[C]

This guy knows his stuff.

[A]

What he wants, Charlie, is he wants to put that on his resume. Currently connected with Charlie Barron's on LinkedIn.

[B]

If I had any idea, my login, I would just add you right now. I don't think I. I need a laptop in, like, 30 minutes. Probably.

[C]

Yeah. Charlie, you don't know where your glasses are in the morning. I mean, I I don't think you know your password. I don't think you have it anywhere.

[B]

I had to guess I'd be resetting that. It's probably been hacked by someone else now. I don't know. You know, aren't people using that as a dating app? LinkedIn?

[C]

If people are, then they're using it for the wrong things. But, you know, you know, Charlie, get me, get me on there, you know,

[A]

so, I mean, you're, you're clearly like, you're pot committed to LinkedIn getting a job. What do you, what are you seeing on LinkedIn right now? What's, what's coming?

[C]

Well, I mean, I mean, just, you know, people. I'm connected to different companies, you know, you know, what they're, what they're posting, you know, but that's where you can apply to jobs, you know, that's what I'm seeing. That's what I'm seeing. But I'm mostly seeing Charlie's profile, you know, screaming out to me. Just screaming out to me. I mean, Miles, I don't know if you got a LinkedIn, but I don't know how much construction is gonna do for you on there. This white collar, Miles, this white collar over here.

[A]

Yeah. Is there a blue, Is there a blue collar LinkedIn out? Like, is there like an app for blue collar guys to connect professionally?

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

I think they call that Angie.

[B]

I think, I think the last time I was on LinkedIn was when I was like a journalist, kind of journalist, kind of comedian, and I was out of work, I think. How many years does it say it's a comedian?

[A]

Like eight.

[C]

Eight years, 10 months.

[A]

Does he have any posts on LinkedIn?

[C]

Oh, man. Oh, hold on, let me, let me scroll, let me scroll.

[B]

It's gonna be real cringy. Whatever is on there is gonna be real crazy.

[C]

I got some featured links. And the award winning journalist, by the way, not to brag. I. I don't, I don't see no posts. I don't see no posts. I mean, you know, the profile could be better, but the name, the name is what I'm looking for. Just.

[A]

You're just a piece of meat to Nate.

[B]

I'm just a piece of meat?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I never understood.

[C]

Clearly. Clearly, no, but it's fine. It's fine.

[A]

I'm gonna be honest with you, Nate. I feel like you shouldn't be an engineer. You just have too much personality to be an engineer.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Speaking of which, let me get my bush light since I'm talking To you guys.

[B]

Nate, are you.

[C]

There we go.

[B]

Are you high or anything like that?

[C]

Oh, absolutely not. No, I don't do any of that.

[B]

Okay, good.

[C]

I drink like crazy, but this is my first beer of the day.

[B]

Okay, got it.

[A]

And how old are you, Nate?

[C]

Oh, for legal reason. Oh, JK. I'm 22. I'm 22.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Huh. Your fake says

[C]

no. My face.

[A]

Yeah, what's your. What's your address? What year were you born?

[C]

Yeah, do you want my social? You're at it. My routing number?

[A]

I'll get it from your LinkedIn.

[C]

No, it's all there. It's all there.

[A]

So what's the dating scene like at Central Michigan? You got a girlfriend or boyfriend?

[C]

No, no. Looking for the women. But, you know, currently I'm focused on career. I don't know the dating scene here. It's just. You don't really. I'm not a fan of most of them around here. I'll be honest.

[B]

Why, Nate?

[C]

I'll be a fan. Oh, dude, you know, if you're gonna find them, you're gonna find them in the bar or the club, and I don't think that's where I'm gonna find my life.

[B]

So are you not much of a dancer?

[C]

Oh, dude, my moves are not on par, let me tell you.

[B]

Well, start working on those moves, Nate.

[C]

I gotta work on the LinkedIn first.

[B]

All you gotta do is you gotta bend your knees and pretend like you're peeing in a walleye hole without your hands.

[C]

Where do you learn that move?

[B]

I thought of it the other day.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

No, it's.

[C]

You just.

[B]

No, you just bend your knees like this, and then.

[A]

Okay. Yeah, peeing around the hole.

[B]

Yeah, pee around the hole.

[A]

I like that.

[C]

Yeah, there's some great podcasting, by the way. I can't see you. Just. Just in case you weren't aware, it's

[B]

not much better if you could, because we got the bar in front of us, so.

[C]

Yeah. Speaking of which, where are you guys at?

[A]

We're at 1029 here in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

[C]

Oh, Minneapolis. Oh, you guys are outside of Fargo for once. That's new.

[A]

Just such a ricochet shop for no reason. Milwaukee all the time.

[B]

Yeah, we go.

[C]

Oh. I mean. Oh, go ahead, go ahead.

[B]

No, no, Nate, I think that you called in with a. There was a reason you called in. Not to roast my LinkedIn, but.

[C]

No, I mean, I was guessing up. Jared, by the way. Jared, you should get on the mic, like, you know, pop on in, you know, whenever you can.

[B]

Jared's great.

[G]

What's up, Nate?

[C]

I want Jared on the mic. Let's go. I got Jared on the mic. This is great, dude. I think Jared needs a face cam like he does on you Bet you radio. That's what he needs.

[A]

Yeah, I think.

[B]

Let's do it.

[G]

It's a little light enough in here.

[B]

I probably could you just use your face cam going. Put a little webcam on your computer.

[A]

Well, here's your chance, Nate. What do you want to talk to Jared about? He's got the mic on.

[G]

What do you want to talk about, Nate?

[C]

You know, Jared, my guy. My guy. I mean, first of all, do you have your LinkedIn on. On hand? I mean, I actually gotta connect with some people.

[G]

Yeah, you can send me one.

[B]

I don't care.

[A]

Yeah, pull up your LinkedIn, J. I gotta find it.

[F]

Hold on.

[B]

Damn.

[C]

This is. This is great.

[B]

You have so much joy in your soul, it's. It's crazy to remember where it was. Like being 20 with a fake ID, dude.

[C]

Oh, there's Bush Light. It's Bush Light.

[A]

All right, let me read his bio here.

[G]

I don't know if I have one.

[A]

He's a content editor slash podcast producer at you Betcha Just accurate. His services are video editing, videography, video production, sports photography, stock photography. How much stock photography?

[G]

I've never done it, but I can do it.

[A]

You do have the ability.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

He's a content editor. He was at you Betcha and Bellied up. He's a videographer at wday. He was chief videographer at KX News, and he was a landscaper at Greenscapes. He's got a bachelor's degree and

[G]

that's it.

[A]

And you just went to Bismarck State College?

[F]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

Didn't do anything there.

[B]

No, but he can his activities and societies.

[A]

He was a tour guide and missed account. Were you really cast at Bismarck State College?

[H]

Wow.

[A]

Dude. He worked on the 75th anniversary documentary of Bismarck State College.

[B]

Damn. I didn't even know we were in the presence of greatness. Jared, he can shoot the news from the bushes and give a tour.

[C]

Jared, how much of that are you doing for You Betcha Right now? Are they having you go out and turn the bushes, like on a whim?

[G]

No, I'm not. I'm covering the news a lot less now with You Betcha. I'll tell you that much right now.

[C]

Oh, yeah. I mean, maybe get back onto the local news.

[A]

Hey, but honestly, I didn't know that you had the skills and stocks photography so we could get into that game. Jared.

[G]

I'M always looking for stock images for pod reels so we could just make our own.

[B]

Dude, there's big money in that. Yeah, yeah.

[G]

Not with AI, though.

[B]

So much now, but there was big money in that.

[F]

There is.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

There still is. For certain kind of bird shots. I kind of. I kind of go down a little bird hole sometimes. Nate.

[A]

What? Is his bio good? Do you think Jared's bio is good or. No?

[C]

Dude, Jared's got a stacked LinkedIn. Let me tell you. Let me tell you.

[A]

Okay, hold on.

[C]

I gotta.

[A]

I gotta read you. Two months ago, Jared posted on LinkedIn. Whoa.

[C]

No shot.

[B]

What did he say? Looking for a new job?

[A]

No, it says, work, work, work, work. That's what he posted.

[C]

And you're working him like a dog, Miles. And.

[A]

And two. That's true. And two years ago, he posted last Tuesday of the week, period. No exclamation point. There is a comment.

[B]

I don't know.

[F]

Who knows?

[A]

The comment says, let's make it count. Then three years ago, he said, last Tuesday of the week, no punctuation. Three years ago, Jared said, business, period. No capital, no capital. Am I right? Question mark. 3 comments. Couldn't have said it better myself. So inspiring and so true. Five years ago, Jared said. Does anyone know how to type? Fake laughing for posts, Try to impress people. It seems like a valuable skill for LinkedIn.

[C]

Hold on, I'll upload that one real quick.

[G]

Thank you.

[C]

I got you covered, Jared. I got you covered.

[A]

It looks like if you do connect with Jared on LinkedIn, you're gonna get about one piece of content every year.

[C]

Okay, no, that's perfect. That's perfect. I mean, I think some people post too much, you know, but clearly it's a stacked resume, and that's what matters.

[G]

Yep. Quality over quantity.

[B]

Jared, what inspires you to write on LinkedIn? What about work when you're at work, work, work, work, work when Miles is

[C]

working him like a dog? Hey, go trim the bushes outside.

[G]

We're not even sure if we have bushes.

[A]

Not right now, at least. There's no bushes to trim.

[B]

It's not.

[A]

Hasn't grown back.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

Nate, Jared's posting on LinkedIn like I'm on LinkedIn.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah, he's trying to.

[A]

He's boasting on LinkedIn like his boss is on LinkedIn.

[B]

Motivational.

[C]

Yeah, motivational. Work, work, work, work, work.

[B]

Tuesday. Last Tuesday of the week. Am I right?

[A]

Was that a Rihanna lyric you were posting?

[G]

I think so.

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

So long ago. I just get in the zone and I just start posting.

[B]

What about last Tuesday of the week? Is that a Jared original or is that something.

[G]

It was just the last Tuesday of the week, though.

[A]

Two years in a row,

[C]

two years running. I mean, where's the last Tuesday of the week this year? Are you doing that?

[A]

Well, it's coming up.

[G]

Yeah, we'll find out.

[B]

Yeah. What's today?

[C]

It's gone. Right.

[A]

Well, we're gonna. We're not gonna tell you that. You gotta. You gotta connect with him and then you'll find out when he posts it.

[G]

Don't want to spoil it.

[C]

Yeah, I sent a connection, by the way. I sent a connection. So you shouldn't, you know, totally add me back. Connect with me when you can.

[B]

Let's. Let's see what's on his profile.

[A]

Yeah, let's look at his profile.

[G]

Is your last name start with a T?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, Nathaniel, you totally found me.

[A]

Let's go.

[C]

The full government name,

[A]

his profile picture hashtag open to work. Now for me as an employer, that's a little try hard. By the way, I'd like you to play a little harder.

[C]

Oh, okay, my mistake, my mistake. I mean, if you're looking for a design engineer, you know, just hit me up.

[A]

All right, let's read his about motivated and committed engineering undergrad with focus on computer aided design, which is also known as cad.

[B]

Cad.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Looking to use technical expertise and design abilities in a fast paced team setting to produce innovative solutions.

[B]

God, that makes me want to snort glass, to be honest with you.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

That's a good thing, right?

[B]

How many syllables do you have in those two sentences?

[C]

Yeah, I don't know. More than my name has.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You were a project engineer. Intern. Nice. Summer help as well.

[B]

Nice, dude. Summer help.

[C]

Yeah, dude, that one. That one stacked resume right there.

[B]

Read that. Summer house.

[C]

Get my hands dirty.

[A]

He built electrical components and on production line according to specifications in CAD.

[B]

Cat, dude, I don't know what cat is.

[A]

He was just a cat intern at one point, dude.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. 3D modeling. 3D modeling.

[B]

Okay, cool.

[C]

3D model something, you know, if you need it done.

[A]

All right. You were volunteered at the Baptist church, small group leader. You also were a green teams coordinator at cmu.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

And you've been endorsed by one person in the last six months. You have one endorsement.

[B]

Who is it? Yeah, Tanner. That's cool.

[C]

That's my roommate, Jared.

[B]

Give a minute.

[C]

Yeah, Jared endorsed me. I mean, he connected with me. I saw that.

[B]

Jared, can you write a post on his Profile, Jared, I don't know if I can. Okay?

[G]

I haven't gone this far in like.

[B]

Dude, you know what?

[A]

I didn't know that you could endorse someone on LinkedIn. I kind of like that I should just go start endorsing random people and then, and then one of them ends up being terrible. It gets arrested and I look bad because I endorse them.

[G]

They have to release like a PR statement.

[B]

You're not on it.

[A]

It's come to my attention that I may or may not have endorsed a certain someone on LinkedIn.

[G]

Streislight effect.

[B]

My mistake.

[A]

Please, please know that I have rescinded my endorsement for said person and I don't condone any of their behavior. I'd like privacy at this time.

[B]

Miles, you don't have a profile, huh?

[A]

I'm sure, I'm sure. I'm sure I have like a Miles you bet you guy profile.

[B]

Let's see. Let's see what he's got. See if he's got. Look up the mom. Pleasure first.

[A]

I probably got Notion Media on there. I probably got it.

[F]

I am.

[B]

Oh, nice. He is on here.

[A]

Video creator. Video content and marketing specialist.

[B]

That's a nice pick, dude. When was that updated?

[A]

Oh, that's. That's nine years ago.

[B]

Wow, dude, nice. You look. You look just like. That was in between.

[A]

That was in between Domino Dan eras.

[G]

I kind of figured.

[C]

Yeah, Domino's guy.

[A]

Yeah. What if there's a Domino Domino delivery driver walking up.

[G]

That's where it started.

[B]

Rotate you on your phone. Can't be bothered. Can't be bothered for this picture.

[A]

Yeah, it was a candid, you know.

[B]

Yeah, I like that. I like going the full candid on it. Any posts?

[A]

Notion Media and I went to msum Bachelor's degree. I do have one endorsement. Click on that.

[G]

Should be good.

[A]

Oh yeah, Ryan.

[F]

Ryan.

[A]

Yeah. Right. Not our Ryan, but different Ryan.

[G]

Yeah, it's not the same thing.

[F]

Yep, it is.

[B]

That's impressive. Congrats, dude. Hey, if this. If this podcasting thing doesn't work out, Miles, I think you got a bright future.

[A]

We should maybe become LinkedIn influencers.

[B]

Yeah, I want to be a Venmo influencer. You can be a LinkedIn. I wanna. Well, Nathan, did you have any reason to call before we let you go?

[C]

I mean. Well, no, I. I totally had a whole story lined up. You know, I was gassing up Jared. That's probably half the reason I'm on this pod is I was gassing him up in my voicemail.

[A]

Okay, so that's a little. Little tidbit for future callers. If you want to get in the podcast, you gotta butter Jared up a little bit.

[G]

It always works.

[C]

I think I buttered up a little bit. A little bit. But I. I called him to talk about my grandma.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

My grandma. Oh, my gosh. I don't. I don't even know where to start. So

[B]

hopefully not the end.

[C]

Well, wrong grandma. So my grandma, on my dad's side, she's a character, you know, I'm trying to figure out how to go about this. We'll start at the beginning of my lifespan with her.

[A]

Good. All right, so now you've come through the birth canal. Is she there? Is she not there?

[C]

No, no, no. I'm not even through the birth canal yet. All right. I'm not even there yet.

[A]

Sorry.

[C]

She's in labor. My mom's in labor. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, so just to set the stage, you know, my mom tells my dad. This has been going on for years. My mom tells my dad, do not tell your parents that I am in labor. I do not want them here. So good start, right?

[B]

Hilarious.

[C]

You know, my dad being the talkative person he is. That's where I get it from. He tells his parents, and she shows up and she opens the door by saying, knock, knock. My mom immediately said, get her out of here. This is from them. I had to, like, find ways to set the stage. This is stories from them, just so you're aware, But I have stuff specifically that I've gone through, such as this last Christmas, which I think is probably what we'll do. So I don't know how to go about this.

[B]

That's very clear, Nathan. That's very clear. But I think you're doing great.

[C]

Thank you. Thank you.

[B]

You just keep talk talking. We're enjoying it.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

Yeah, let's gas you up right now.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. Come on. Add me on LinkedIn. So. So I'll. I'll tell you about this. Last Christmas or Christmas in 2024, she gave some of the wildest gifts I have ever seen. Like, bad. Like, bad, bad. Now some people will say, like, you know, oh, that's super cute. Oh, my gosh, your grandparents are so cute. No, it's not. She's not five. Thank you. So, I don't know, should I send you guys some of the pictures? I have pictures of all of these gifts so that I can, like.

[A]

Yeah, just text it to this number. What starts describing them. What. What gifts are we talking?

[C]

So I'll send you some of the. The rappings first, because her rapping job is subpar at best. She's even spelled my name wrong on one of them.

[A]

How do you get. How do you get Nate wrong?

[C]

Full name? Full name. Nathaniel. She. She forgot the L you can see on one of the pictures I saw.

[B]

Nathany.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yep. Exactly how she spelled it.

[A]

So it's poking out the top.

[C]

Here's a. Here's a few more of them.

[A]

Oh, that's so good, dude, because you know what's happening? That is leftover paper from the Christmas before, and she only had so much.

[B]

I have so much respect for your grandma's game. Her rapping game is on point.

[A]

This is like if you did Christmas with Charlie Baron.

[B]

Yeah, this is exactly what it looks like. Like, what's in the packaging, Nathany.

[C]

So thank you, Chuck. So I got a few. I said a few of the other things she sent us. Dream catchers, me and my sister. All right, cool. We're not really into that, but okay. Okay. The next thing I sent was, look, I'm not doing tariff cards on this podcast. Think. I think she'd be really into that.

[B]

She sent you stationary?

[A]

No, those are just notepads that she's collected over the years. Like, one I think is from a hotel. Oh, no, this one is St. Jude's Hospital.

[B]

Your grandma is stealing the paper from a hospital.

[C]

Is that a comb Warrior Project 1.

[B]

Oh, that comes in the mail.

[C]

Use one. Yeah, look at the Wounded Warrior Project 1. You can clearly see that that's someone else's because she scribbled out the name at the top.

[B]

Oh, my God, that's so good. That is so good.

[C]

Most of them were also used. Like, not all the paper was there. Some of them had, like, three pages left. She's just giving up. Just giving back the chunk she has in her, like, drawer. And the.

[A]

The one of the three pieces of paper you have, you can see the indents from what Someone wrote the page before, too.

[B]

It's a Christmas list for the kids. Look at that. Hand sanitizer, dude. That's from 1964.

[C]

She wrote hand sanitizer on it in case we didn't know.

[A]

Good. What is this metal free from?

[C]

That's a clearly a used beret. Is that what you call it? Yeah, yeah, it's clearly used. There's, like, some gunk on it. If I'd be in the heirloom, though,

[B]

you know, that's fine. Just put some of that hand sanitizer from 1974 on it, and that should clean it right up. Two gloves.

[C]

Two gloves. Clearly work gloves that she got from, like, I don't know, a work site.

[B]

Well, those are. Those aren't bad.

[A]

Those look new, at least from an

[C]

electrical kit, you know, that you just, like, get on a whim. He gets that.

[A]

So, all right, you got these calendars. Was it for the correct.

[C]

Explain that. Yes, yes, correct. Because we were giving this in 2024, but there's some explanation to do with that. So she sends my dad a car calendar every year. Whatever. He's, like, fine with it. He would just, like, use it as a cutting board downstairs or something. I don't know. He doesn't really care. But she sent us a little. Oh, my gosh. There's a little note along with one of them saying that this is a one of a kind calendar. Tim, this is a one of a kind 2025 calendar. I looked and looked for a calendar with cars. Never found one. So I made this for you. So it's the sunrises and sunsets 2025 calendar. It's clearly like a paper calendar. I didn't really think much of it when I was opening it because, like, me, my sister spent the night opening this, and we didn't think much of it. And my sister said. She said, maid. What if she glued stuff in there? So I opened it up and she glued the cars in there.

[A]

She bought a sunset calendar and then cut out pictures of cars and taped them in the sunset setting.

[B]

Dude. Oh, she cut that out of a magazine. I feel so bad for the Walgreens. Where she got all those pictures from

[C]

is expert work. Is expert work.

[A]

There's what? There's a car on the beach.

[B]

Honestly, this is brilliant. Dude. You're. You're. Think of all the thought your grandma put into that.

[C]

I mean, look, she's. She did her best.

[B]

Just imagine.

[A]

Say, I've seen some bad old people gifts. These. This has got to be the worst I've seen.

[B]

Just imagining her grandma walking into a Walgreens looking for the car magazine, just starting to cut them out of there and then put it right back down the rack.

[G]

It's old school Photoshop, which is.

[B]

Yeah, it is.

[A]

That would be on our LinkedIn bio.

[G]

Photoshop expert.

[A]

Analog Photoshop expert.

[B]

You know, that is one of a kind. I guarantee you nobody else in the world made one of those for your dad last Christmas.

[C]

You know, it is one of one. It is one of one. Let's see if I can get it signed from her.

[B]

She did sign it.

[C]

Kind of like a Retired Jersey. We'll see. We'll see. I. I'm trying to get her to. That would be big. I could sell that for millions.

[B]

Did she mark any dates on the calendar? Things to remember, like her birthday.

[C]

It's another thing. So she. She told us. I think it was on. Thanks. Thanksgiving of that year. She gave us a little, like, printout calendar. She said, I didn't see you guys enough this year. So here's all the dates. I want to see you guys next year. She, like, marked everyone's birthdays off. She marked off every single holiday, you know, obviously. Mother's Day, Father's Day. She marked off, like, the occasional weekend because she's like, I want see you guys every weekend. Yeah. So that was nice. Oh, oh, here's another one. That's my sister. I'm sending you another one. That's my sister holding a handcrafted shirt for her.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Well, that's nice.

[B]

That is cute.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, it's the little. Little gems.

[A]

It's falling apart already. Yeah, it's missing some gems.

[C]

I mean, you know, it's falling apart.

[B]

Well, it's. It's what the kids like these days. It's vintage.

[C]

Yeah, no, it's vintage. Yes. It's perfect for the Goodwill. It is perfect for the Goodwill.

[B]

I think she went to the dumpster out back, the Goodwill, to get most of these. These are the Goodwill. I don't think she did. And that's the most impressive thing about the whole thing. Wow.

[A]

God, just think, though, how much more you look forward to Christmas every year, though, knowing you're like, what are we gonn unwrap next?

[B]

Yeah, that's the real present.

[A]

Well, that is the present.

[B]

Yeah. Sometimes you barely even have to unwrap it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What up?

[A]

You know, you don't remember what you got from your parents four years ago, but I guarantee you remember what you got from your grandma.

[B]

Never gonna forget this.

[C]

I remember this one. No, I. I see. Look, here's the problem, though. She was uninvited to Christmas this previous year because of her shenanigans on Thanksgiving.

[B]

What'd you do?

[C]

My mom. My mom said, you are not inviting your mother to my dad. So she was not invited.

[B]

What'd she do,

[C]

open the door for? My sister did open the door. My grandma ignores her, sits on the couch and starts reading. She must have had having a bad day. She sat there, she read the whole time until we went and ate. She, you know, ate her plate and then she left.

[B]

Well, she's a single word.

[C]

She didn't help out my mom.

[A]

It's probably because you guys have made fun of her so much.

[C]

It probably is. You know, my. My mom is the main spearhead for the operation Trust. You know, I'll give her a lot of crap. I. I try to include her a lot of the time, but I just don't think she. She gets it a lot. She'll often take it and kind of like, roll with the whole thing, you know, she'll. She'll take over the entire conversation if she's given an ounce of anything. You know, everything's about her all of a sudden, which. To each one's own. It's just happens every time. Time. And then she'll give us these gifts to go with it.

[B]

That's great, dude. That's when you just go pour yourself a drink, ask her a leading question, one that kind of gets on your mom's nerves, and then just watch it like it's a TV show. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, my gosh, dude. You know, my mom and dad are probably gonna listen to this because my mom. My mom probably posted this on Facebook because I accidentally told her about this.

[A]

Your mom posted on Facebook that you were gonna be on the belly podcast?

[C]

She probably did. I. I wouldn't be surprised. I turned off notifications from her because every time I looked at her Facebook, I get a little too embarrassed. My mom posts a lot about me.

[A]

Maybe your mom is a lot more like a grandma than she thinks.

[B]

That's usually the issue.

[C]

And the thing is, you know, again, it's my dad's mom that we're talking about here, but my mom does share some similarities. Now, my mom's probably going to kill me when she hears this.

[B]

Well, get specific then.

[A]

No, I know, but this is, like.

[D]

This is.

[A]

I found podcasting is a great way to get family members to change their behavior. So lay it out.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

What do you. What's your mom do that you hate?

[C]

Dude, my. Oh, my mom, she'll get heated over, like, okay, like, after the Thanksgiving situation, like, you know, we did, like, a little. Little debrief. Of course, afterwards and whatnot, we kind of did a family game night. Oh, my gosh. She was sitting there fuming the whole time, and, you know, we're all having fun playing. I think we were playing Monopoly. And, you know, and if my mom just burst out, here's another thing. She starts yapping about, like, everything she did wrong that day. We're all like, all right, thanks for killing the mood.

[B]

You know what? She'll do that Oftentimes, she just needed. She needs to blow the top off the steam, you know, blow some steam off. What's the. What's the thing? Pop. Pop the kettle, you know, otherwise. Otherwise it gets held in. And what better time to do it than Monopoly, you know, what a brutal game. And then you just get a little bit more entertainment. That's when you just stir the pot. You know,

[C]

you're saying, stir the pot, not. You don't want to cool it down. You want to stir.

[B]

Yeah, because these, they got to come out, you know, Otherwise it sits there and simmers till next Thanksgiving, and she doesn't want to invite her.

[C]

Is that what you do with your 11 siblings?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I don't know. How many you got?

[B]

I figure out which ones are having a tiff, and I make sure to just ask one leading question and walk away, you know?

[C]

Know, I. I bet that works out really well for you. Do you still leave them on the mantle?

[B]

No, they're too big for the mantle now.

[A]

What's funny, dude? What's funny is of all the stuff we've talked about recently. Podcast. My mom brought that up to me too.

[B]

What she bring up?

[A]

I can't believe Charlie was just leaving his siblings on the. Man, she's like, that's crazy.

[B]

I know, dude. I think about that. I'm like, what was wrong with me? But, you know, where did I get that idea? Right? But also, like, for these kids, they were old enough at that point, you know, and it taught them resilience and public humiliation. It wasn't public humiliation. They were too young to be humiliated. They. And I was almost a two year old.

[A]

He gets embarrassed.

[B]

So did I actually say that on this podcast?

[A]

What, the mantle?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, we broadcasted that to the world.

[E]

World.

[B]

Well, that should.

[C]

Yeah. What did you think?

[A]

He was there.

[B]

I wasn't the only one that did that, dude. But that. That someone must have done that to me. Hurt people. Hurt people. Who did? Who did it to me? Which uncle?

[F]

Oh, man.

[B]

Damn. Maybe I'm an.

[C]

I don't. I think that's a. I think that's a Original experience. Yeah.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I did not leave my sister on the mantle. I'm gonna be straight with you.

[A]

You.

[B]

Well, how much younger is she than you?

[C]

Six years.

[B]

Yeah. You couldn't have reached the mantle when she was mantle sitting time, you know, Look, I'm not gonna sit here and defend myself. It wasn't the right thing to do. But I was a minor, so I can't be convicted.

[C]

Okay. Are you saying I should have gotten all of my, like, crimes out of the way while I was still blowing at the age of 18.

[B]

I mean, kind of. Yeah, that's sort of how the system set up.

[A]

Yeah. It's not a bad idea.

[C]

What the hell have I been doing that.

[A]

Tell your sister. Tell your sister before it's too late.

[C]

I'll have to let her know. She hits you. She only got much time left. Go commit crimes. Go rob a bank. And make sure it saved me some. What am I doing? Yeah. Oh, my gosh.

[B]

Well, I think at 17, you can be tried as an adult, so you really want to look at the local restrictions on that kind of thing.

[A]

Thing?

[C]

My sister's 16 right now, so, like, you know, it's perfect.

[A]

She's got some perfect crime.

[B]

She's got some time.

[C]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. No, I. I think. I think she can get something done right now and. And then save me a piece. That's all I'm saying.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Lord knows I need a. I need a little extra cheddar cheese.

[B]

Nathan, you're. You're a real piece of work. In the best way. Best way.

[C]

I don't know if I like that anymore. I. I think I'm. All of a sudden. I don't want you to connect with me on LinkedIn.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Oh, Nate. Then I said, I might mean that in the best way.

[A]

You're starting to sound a little like your mom and grandma right now.

[B]

Yeah, I haven't kind of crashed out yet. Runs in the family.

[A]

I can feel the crash out coming.

[B]

Yeah, see, this is what I'm talking about, Nathan. I just stir the pot a little and then watch it. Watch it bake. I gotta get this freaking analogy. Nathan. Nathan, I just says. All I said was you're a piece of work. I didn't say a good piece of work or a bad piece of work. You interpreted that so. Questions? What does that say about you? You know.

[C]

You know, it says I'm a bad piece of work, but, you know, it is what it is. We'll live with it.

[B]

No, you're. You're a good guy, Nathan. In fact, I think Miles is right. You should go into sales because you're. You're a chatterbox man. You can. You could sell a horse to a Subaru dealer. And I think you got a lot of potential either. I'm just.

[A]

I think this is a PSA for everyone. Don't drink and do antibiotics.

[C]

Hold on a second. I am doing drinking with no antibiotics, all right? I'm just doing a lot of drinking.

[B]

No, no, that's.

[A]

We're talking about Charlie. Charlie's on antibiotics right now, and he had a fireball shot. You can't get the. The saying right.

[B]

I forgot about the antibiot shot.

[C]

Yes, you did a fireball shot. Oh, my gosh. I'll do one right now with you. I feel like we are.

[A]

I feel like Nate is a great kid, and we're just, like. We're the wrong crowd for him to hang out with.

[B]

I know. We.

[C]

We're like.

[B]

We're bruised with two more decades of life, Miles.

[A]

You know? Like, I feel like his mom's definitely, like, don't be hanging out with those kids.

[B]

Yeah. That guy who called you a piece of work.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. No, she would. She would not like me talking to you guys. She's probably gonna be like, who the heck were those guys? That's what she's gonna say.

[B]

You're a great guy, Nathan.

[A]

Well, we appreciate you calling in today, dude.

[C]

Dude, I. I appreciate you guys yapping. Well, me yapping at you guys, I guess, more accurately.

[B]

No, we're excited for your career moves and all the connections you're gonna get on LinkedIn after this podcast, guys.

[C]

Dude, I already got Jared on. On lock. That's all I needed, I guess. I mean, that's all I need. You're kind of an afterthought now. Yeah. Thank you, Jared. Thank you. Just, you know, make sure to, you know, put that yearly post out. Yeah.

[G]

If you ever need an endorsement, just message me and endorse you.

[B]

I'll.

[C]

I'll contact you. Yeah, I'll contact you. And, you know, if. If Bellied up ever needs some 3D modeling done, I got you guys covered.

[A]

It's good to have a CAD guy in our back pocket.

[B]

Cat guy. You want to be part of some stock photos, Nathan?

[C]

Oh, dude, I would love to. I would love to. I mean, you. You should see my. My poses. I mean, I can't dance. I can pose.

[G]

Do you have nice feet?

[C]

Oh, dude. Do you want to see them?

[A]

That is a work phone. Do not send those.

[C]

Just look at my mom's Facebook. She's got that on there.

[A]

She's got your feet on her Facebook.

[C]

Why do you think I turned off my notifications to when she posts about me?

[A]

You guys are a wild family. All right, Fanny. Thanks for calling in, dude.

[B]

Tell your grandma and mom we say hi.

[C]

Oh, I will certainly tell them. You make sure to change your ear filters and watch for deer now.

[B]

We will tell your sister I say peace.

[C]

Oh, I'll let her know.

[B]

See ya.

[A]

Well, Charlie, is that another episode of the Belly up podcast?

[B]

That's another episode. Nathaniel took us for a ride there, man. We didn't know where we were going,

[A]

but here we are.

[B]

That's the beauty of Bellied up.

[A]

So, guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode. Always remember to tip your bartender.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We'll see you next one.

[C]

Okay. Hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye now, Oodaloon.