Should the U.P. Belong to Wisconsin? #211

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast – Episode #211: “Should the U.P. Belong to Wisconsin?” (07/30/2026)

Hosts: Charlie Berens & Myles “You Betcha Guy”
Notable Guests/Callers: Jared (producer), Tim from Alabama, Pockets’ cousin (from Michigan’s Upper Peninsula)

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Episode Overview

This episode of Bellied Up is equal parts Midwest humor, real-life stories from everyday folks, and genuine riffs between hosts Charlie Berens and Myles. While the title references the ongoing debate about whether Michigan's Upper Peninsula (U.P.) should actually be part of Wisconsin, the calls and discussions also dive into regional identity, wild personal history, and plenty of deadpan comedy. The episode manages to effortlessly shift from Diet Coke versus real cigarettes, through deeply personal family stories, all while keeping a warm, barroom storytelling vibe.

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Key Segments & Highlights

1. Bar Banter: Bad Habits With No Consequences

[00:00 – 02:45]

• The show opens with classic “belly up to the bar” banter.
• Myles jokes about replacing real cigarettes with "fridge cigs" (Diet Cokes) since becoming a parent.
• Prompt: “What would you do if you could do something terrible for you for a day with no consequences?”
  • Myles: “Binge drinking.” [01:04]
  • Charlie: “I'd go skydiving without a parachute.” [02:10]
  • The conversation playfully escalates (hard drugs, eating 12 loaves of bread).
  • Myles (joking): “Maybe try something really crazy like telling my wife she needs to lose some weight.” [02:47] (clarifies immediately it’s a joke; his wife is an “angel.”)

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2. Comedy Special Name Brainstorm With Jared

[03:36 – 13:01]

Jared pitches future comedy special titles for Charlie:

• “Here I Go Again” [04:38]
• “You Thought I Was Finished” [05:39]
• “And One More Thing” [06:16]
• “Forgot to Remember” [06:44]
• “This One’s For Pete’s Sake” [07:00]
• “Lee’s Juiz” (a spoonerism for “Jeez Louise”) [07:30]
• “That’s Interesting” [08:15]
• “Watch Out For Laughs” [08:43]

Discussion Tone:

• Warm and satirical; light ribbing back and forth.
• Charlie: “That sounds like a Midwest high end clothing brand… That’s my Sean John right there.” – about “Lee’s Juiz” [07:47]
• Suggestion for a tour called "Chuck Bob" referencing Charlie’s full name Charles Robert Berens (“Chuck Bob Berens”). [10:28]
• Playful bit about potential tour merch (“Lee’s Juiz” on the butt of sweatpants) [11:10].

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3. Call 1: Tim From Alabama – Midwest vs. South, Regional Identity, and Adventure Stories

[15:06 – 46:41]

Who is Tim?

• Disabled former Walmart employee from Haleyville, Alabama — claims his town had the first-ever 911 call. [15:35]
• Engages in friendly, informative dialogue about Southern culture, ranging from fishing and lake life to accents, and even legal limitations after a brain injury.

Notable Moments:

• On regional festivals:
  “We’re getting ready next week to have a big 911 festival here in town.” [16:12]

• Is Michigan the Midwest?
  “Is Michigan considered the Midwest?” –Tim [18:46]
  Charlie: “Absolutely… although that part should be part of Wisconsin, I won’t go into that now…” [19:00]

• On the Upper Peninsula (U.P.):
  Myles: “The U.P is kind of just like a leech attached to Wisconsin at the top.” [19:15]

• Fishing & Nature:
  Tim talks about bass, drum (“trash fish of the water”), and their fighting power. [23:38] Charlie recounts “hand fishing for sunnies.” [24:17]

• Plumbing & Cheese Diet:
  “How does y’alls plumbing deal with all that cheese and stuff y’all eat?” –Tim [24:40]
  Charlie (deadpan): “The plumbing really just relies on a little coleslaw... flush a little coleslaw down, that breaks it up real good.” [25:13]

• Accent Swap Challenge:
  Hosts and Tim exchange Midwest and Southern accents and rate one another’s delivery.

  • Tim (on Charlie’s Southern): “I think you need to spend a little bit more time down here, and then you’ll get it…” [33:21]
  • **Hosts coach Tim into saying “Oh ya, you betcha. Watch out for deer.” [34:50]

• Stories from Tim's life:

  • Survived a Walmart workplace accident (traumatic brain injury). [19:49]
  • Once bought a bootleg DVD and witnessed a police takedown in NYC on a school trip. [37:25]
  • Strategic “purse recovery” with his high school teacher against NYC street vendors. [41:03]
  • Entered a “congressman’s bathroom” in D.C. by accident—was stopped by Secret Service. [42:16]

• NFL and College Loyalties:

  • Tim: “Roll Tide Country. War Eagle is a bad word.” [29:59]
  • On being a Bears fan: “My mom from Chicago, Illinois.” [30:28]

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4. Call 2: Pockets’ Cousin – Wild Upper Peninsula Family Saga

[47:15 – 79:13]

Caller Background:

• From Michigan’s Upper Peninsula (U.P. or “Yooper territory”)
• Mix of humor, family hardship, and a look at the reality of insular rural communities.

The Pockets Story:

• Premise:
  The caller’s cousin (nicknamed “Pockets,” real name Dylan) is serving 30 years in a Texas prison for murder.

• Situation Details:

  • Pockets was found in the car of the deceased, who was his grandpa’s elderly roommate. [47:45]
  • Question as to whether Pockets was actually guilty; caller is ambivalent, outlines a messy, complicated family backstory involving substance abuse, mental health issues, and frequent legal trouble.
  • “He helped me raise my kids… If he wouldn’t have been in my life, I wouldn’t be able to hold the job there or at the nursing home I'm at…” [54:09]

• Memorable Quotes:

  • Caller: “He saved my life a few times... he went and told them it was his [cocaine] and kept my record clean.” [54:09]
  • On milestone moments: “We found out on my wedding day too, which is really rough.” [49:33]
  • Charlie (on family dynamic): “Maybe just have a family meeting when Pockets gets out and say, ‘Let’s pretend we’re all on probation all the time.’” [75:36]

• Unfiltered U.P. Life:

  • Making bongs from Zippo lighter cans and trumpet mouthpieces. [56:06]
  • “Poking the Smart” = smoking weed. [55:39]
  • Story: a party guest drinks from a Captain Morgan bottle that had been repurposed “secondarily” as a toilet. [58:13]
  • "If you saw me, you’d be like, oh yeah, this dude smokes the pot… with a big beard, glasses, bong in the car at all times." [73:57]
  • Family are multi-generation pot growers—won a High Times Cannabis Cup in Michigan. [59:15]
  • Explains cannabis extraction chemistry, legalization, and family adjustment to new laws. [59:26–62:40]

• Wisconsin vs. U.P. Identity:

  • Myles: “UP kind of looks like a leech on Wisconsin.” [69:04]
  • Caller: “If you guys had legal weed, I would push to be part of Wisconsin.” [69:24]

• Family, Hardship, and Resilience:

  • Caller supports his family, works 90 hours/week. [77:15]
  • Candid about messy, loyal, and at times criminal family connections.
  • “Every family has their good days and their bad days... we talked about a couple of Pocket's bad things and a couple of good things.” [74:40]

Notable Humor:

• "Scouting of America" renamed away from "Boy Scouts," initials now being "SA" (which the caller points out, tongue-in-cheek, is also short for "sexual assault"). [71:27]
• Ongoing jokes about traveling by compass (not GPS), leading to Jeep Compass puns. [72:30]

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5. Uniting Themes

• Duality of People:
  The episode ends with hosts reflecting on the “duality of man,” recognizing the good and bad aspects in everyone—especially highlighted by the Pockets story. [79:41]

• Midwest Identity:
  Recurring jokes about Midwest/Southern geography, accents, and food culture.

• Comedy in the Mundane:
  The hosts’ gift is elevating plain talk to a place of affectionate humor and community, from Diet Coke and cheese talk, to stories of hardship or oddballs at the bar.

• Barroom Wisdom:
  “Who are we to judge?” [79:55]
  “Every family’s got their good days and bad days.” [74:40]

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Myles (on U.P.): “You ever thought about that? The U.P. is kind of just like a leech attached to Wisconsin at the top...” [19:15]
• Caller’s Family Work Ethic: “I work at a hotel washing dishes, I work at a nursing home, and I work down in Menominee... I work like 90 hours a week sometimes.” [77:15]
• Tim’s Southern Accent Challenge: “I think you need to spend a little bit more time down here, and then you'll get it...” [33:21]
• Comedy Special Brainstorm:
  Charlie: “That sounds like a Midwest high end clothing brand... That’s my Sean John right there!” (about “Lee’s Juiz”) [07:47]
• Cannabis Extraction Explanation: “The big thing that makes a big difference is going to be how wet the stuff is when you run it—you want to run her wet, you don’t want to dry her out.” [59:33]
• Hosts’ Reflection:
  Myles: “That was a lot to process.” [79:19]
  Charlie: “Who are we to judge?” [79:55]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:00] – Opening banter and “What would you do with no consequences?”
• [03:36] – Jared’s stand-up special names segment
• [15:06] – First caller: Tim from Alabama
• [47:15] – Second caller: Pockets’ cousin from the Upper Peninsula
• [59:15] – High Times Cannabis Cup winning, deep dive into cannabis chemistry
• [69:04] – U.P. identity; Wisconsin v. Michigan debate
• [71:24] – Boy Scouts becoming Scouts of America
• [77:15] – Caller’s work/life/family juggling
• [79:41] – Hosts’ wrap-up and duality of man

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Tone and Style

• Warm, irreverent, and conversational
• Blends serious, personal moments with smart-aleck asides and affectionate ribbing
• Uses Midwest and Southern slang naturally ("you betcha," "Roll Tide")
• Candid about the “rough edges” of real people without judgment

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Conclusion

Bellied Up #211 is a testament to the unfiltered, funny, and sometimes poignant stories you’ll only hear by “bellying up to the bar.” Through segments that range from riffing on tour names to real-life struggles of working Americans, the Midwest identity, sibling drama, and the ever-present question of state borders and belonging, Charlie and Myles create an engaging, big-hearted episode that leaves listeners with laughs, empathy, and just a bit more knowledge about cheese, weed, and regional rivalry.

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Transcript

[A]

Hey, folks, welcome back to the Bellied up podcast. I'm here with my buddy Miles, who's sucking on a fridge Sig.

[B]

Yeah, you know how they always say, like, you've been drinking a lot, you just, like, mix in a water once in a while? I like to mix in a DC dc little fridge sig.

[A]

Just get that aspartame up in those veins.

[B]

Now that I got a. Now that I got a kid, I can't really be smoking real cigs outside the bar, so instead I grab for a fridge cigarette.

[A]

I wonder what's worse for you. A fridge sag or a real cig?

[B]

A real cigarette.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Without. Without a question.

[A]

I don't know, Miles. I don't know. I've been reading things on the Internet.

[B]

You've been hanging out with my mom. My mom does not. She thinks aspartame is not good.

[A]

Yeah, she's stranded.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, if I had, you know, 400 Diet Cokes today, I think I'd probably be in big trouble with the aspartame.

[A]

What's something that you would do that, you know is bad for you, but if it wasn't for a day, you would just do it all the time?

[B]

Binge drinking.

[A]

That's it. You have all the options in the world, Miles.

[B]

Do it. Say it again. You made a video.

[A]

It's a terrible. It's a terrible.

[B]

Say it again.

[A]

Okay. If something you knew is terrible for you, but you could do it for a day with no consequences, what would you do?

[B]

Oh, some hard drugs.

[A]

Hard drugs? Yeah.

[B]

Just all of them.

[C]

Or a lot of ice cream.

[B]

Yeah, but I.

[C]

No consequences. You won't gain any weight. You won't get sick or nothing.

[B]

Well, then I'm. Then I'm just eating unlimited loaves of bread if we're on the food route, but with, you know. Because the consequences on eating 12 loaves of bread in a day is not good, but it's not going to be terrible. Right, but if I could just do one day and get all hard drugs out of the way and say I did them all and there's no consequences.

[A]

Yeah, that'd be.

[B]

Why wouldn't you choose that? Yeah, I could actually do 12 loaves

[A]

of bread in one day, you know, I mean. Yeah, I think. I think.

[C]

Yeah, that's a good one, because then you can say you've done them then, too.

[A]

I think I go skydiving without a parachute.

[B]

Okay. Yeah, I guess that's a good one.

[A]

It's probably the most dangerous thing you can do, I think.

[B]

That I would maybe. That would maybe be a good excuse to go to space as well.

[A]

Oh, yeah. I tie myself to a rocket.

[B]

You know, you can die, go to

[C]

space or go to the bottom of the ocean.

[A]

Yeah, get on, get in one of.

[B]

Go see a Titanic. Yeah, that could be good.

[A]

Carbon fiber don't matter, dude. Yeah, that's how it goes. Well, good. I'm glad we got that out of the way.

[B]

You know, maybe, just maybe, you know, maybe try something really crazy like telling maybe I'll tell my wife that she needs to lose some weight.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I've got no consequences.

[A]

I've got two clips I'm going to send and from today.

[B]

That was a joke. My wife. My wife's an angel and she's perfect just the way she is. She is just like, you know, I, you know it's a joke because she had to deal with Domino Dan for, for a while there.

[A]

Domino Dan.

[B]

I was so fat. I am concerned. I have gained a little weight lately and I do need to get back on the wagon. And I got some. I got at least 10 to 15 to lose again.

[A]

Full circle, dude. That's why you're doing the dc.

[B]

Yeah. Can't do decent.

[A]

D Siggy.

[B]

Jared said he had a segment for us. Jared?

[A]

What's the segment? Jared?

[C]

So I was bored last night.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I had nothing going on.

[A]

Dangerous.

[B]

You were Bo. I thought you said you were born last night. I thought that was the segment. So then we have to get you up, up to speed on what's going on in the world.

[C]

We could do that. So, Charlie, I know you're. You're a stand up comedian.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And you have comedy special names, titles.

[A]

Neighborly. Yeah.

[C]

So I was, I was brainstorming what your future comedy special titles could be.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

And you can feel free to use these.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

He's releasing them from any copywriting or.

[C]

It's in the Charlie domain after I say.

[B]

Correct. Yes.

[A]

Okay. I like this segment, Jared. This is good. What?

[B]

I like a Jared led segment here.

[A]

I do like that. I do like that.

[C]

I have like eight of them.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

First one is here I go again.

[B]

There has to be, there has to be a special already named that that

[A]

sounds like a tour. Like, like comedians name their tours before they know any of the material.

[D]

So.

[A]

So all the tour names are just the most random, like basic kind of like it says something like tangentially funny, but you're not sure what kind of like, like neighborly.

[B]

Like it doesn't really mean anything.

[A]

Right. Well, also with Neighborly. Yeah, I thought that too, you know.

[B]

Oh, here I go again. Maybe an op to really tailor it towards. Oh, here I go again.

[A]

My current tour is called the Lost and found Tour. Just, just to bring it all together. But that, that was based.

[B]

Does it mean anything?

[A]

It was based off a bit that I was. That I thought that A bit that I was writing at the time that I thought it no longer is very good. By the way, all tickets for the Lost and found tour can be found. Charlie Barrons dot com. What other titles do you have, Jared?

[C]

The next one is you thought I was finished.

[A]

That's good. That's good. Yeah, and it's just, just, just me and bed looking at the camera.

[B]

And then a follow up tour afterwards. You finished, right? These are good so far. We could go gauntlet with this. Jared, which one do you like the most? So far?

[A]

So far, like you thought I was finished.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

All right, this next one, I think it's. It should be your last comedy special like when you're 90.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And one more thing.

[A]

Okay. That's cute. That's cute. I still think I, I. That you thought I was finished. Yeah.

[B]

And then it's you on the COVID

[A]

going, yeah, I'm back.

[B]

Or you know. Yeah, you are laying in bed. It's overhead. You just have a cigarette in your mouth.

[A]

Yeah, There you go.

[C]

Mm. Next one is forgot to remember.

[A]

I like that one. I like that one.

[B]

Lost and Found Tour, basically.

[A]

Yeah, I forgot to remember. I like that one. That one's a new winner.

[B]

That's the new winner.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Next one is this one's for Pete's sake.

[A]

That's great. That I might take. You know, I build up a Pete character, you know, that'd be funny if the final joke, if the final joke, the final punchline is actually funny is Pete's sake. If you can take such a, an average phrase and make that actually funny. That's. That's like a reverse cliche. Reform is what it is.

[C]

Next one is Lee's Juiz. So it's just. You reverse the letters of.

[A]

Jeez Louise, Jared. Louise, Jared.

[C]

What.

[A]

What is your poor wife doing while you're coming up with things?

[B]

Yeah, that's my favorite.

[A]

That sounds like a Midwest high end clothing brand. That's like my Sean John right there.

[B]

Lee's, Joey, Liz, Joey's.

[A]

There's this, there's this one high end restaurant, Milwaukee called Charles for Maj, which I think is, it's French for Chuck E. Cheese. Pretty awesome. Not a sponsor I don't like.

[C]

This one. Next one is. That's interesting.

[A]

That's interesting.

[B]

Yeah, it's very similar to neighborly and Lost. I don't really like it.

[A]

Oh you Miles. That was an authentic.

[B]

Doesn't really jump off a page at me. This is scream. I gotta go watch this special.

[A]

Yeah, Neighborly Free on YouTube.

[C]

Last one. Watch out for laughs.

[A]

Oh, that one I don't like. I don't like that one at all. Jared. That one is. That is my Elvis Christmas themed.

[C]

It's like if you're a hack 80s comic, that would be your.

[A]

Yeah, that's like. That's like a special that your aunt is trying to convince you to watch.

[B]

I got another one for you.

[A]

What?

[B]

Come hungry and leave happy.

[A]

How do you spell come?

[B]

However you want. What do you think of that one?

[A]

No, I don't like it.

[B]

Okay. What do you think about. I like this. Jared. What do you think about laughing Good in the neighborhood. You already did Neighborly.

[A]

It sounds like Mr. Rogers went hip hop.

[B]

Because I was thinking it kind of sounds like Applebee's.

[A]

Oh, that's where it coming from.

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Feeling. Yeah. I went over.

[B]

Maybe I should do a comedy tour.

[A]

Maybe you should can be called over my head.

[B]

Oh, oh yeah. Over. Over my head.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. You should do a comedy tour.

[B]

Put that one on my bad bit list. So it's like 14.

[A]

That's good. I need miles to have a bad bit list.

[C]

I called the bad bit. Less bad bit Charlie.

[A]

Bad bit Charlie. I like that dude.

[B]

Well, Chuck Bob Chug bad Chuck Bob Bitch list.

[A]

Chucky bombs.

[B]

Do you guys know that Charles middle name is Robert Chucky Bob? Charlie's He's Charles Robert Barons. Which is just Chuck Bob Barons.

[A]

Chuck Bob. Chucky Bob.

[B]

It's a huge miss about you to not be decapitalizing on Chuck.

[A]

Dude, how many Chuck Bobs do you know?

[C]

Chuck Bob be a great comedy special, dude.

[B]

Yeah, it is.

[A]

There it is, dude. There it is. I like that Chuck Bob.

[B]

So which one of those do you like the most?

[A]

Are the ones you just said. One at Jared's.

[B]

No, no. Out of all all that was said.

[A]

Read them all again, quick. Jerry.

[C]

Here I go again. You thought I was finished. And one more thing forgot to remember. This one's for Pete's sake. That's interesting. Lee's Juiz. Watch out.

[A]

Lisa is the bastard. These juice is great and I want the COVID to just be me like in a pair of like tight ass hugging jeans. And where the wrangler would be, it would just say Lee's Joys, you know?

[B]

Yeah. Or you can wear the Victoria's Secret sweatpants that say Juicy on the butt. It just says Lee's Joys on the butt.

[A]

That's nice.

[B]

And you're. And you're looking over your shoulder like this.

[A]

I like that.

[B]

Or we do a copper tone where you're wearing a bikini and there's a dog grabbing your back of your swim bottoms, and it's like you see your butt crack and then you have a tramp stamp that says Lee's Joy.

[A]

Oh, even better. Even better. I like that. I gotta start doing some squats for that. But I'm. Thank you, Jared, because usually that takes forever to come up with those.

[C]

So I just got you eight specials here.

[A]

No, I appreciate that. I just gotta write them now.

[B]

You have a plethora of special names

[A]

now, just begging for it. I kind of like the idea of you guys naming my next special, and I gotta write something to make sense to it.

[B]

Like Lee's Joiz.

[A]

Yeah. Now I kind of wish there was another one. I'll think about that.

[B]

Also, is your hat drying?

[A]

It's still wet.

[B]

I could not believe you didn't just get a different hat.

[A]

I didn't have another hat.

[B]

You weren't listening to the last episode. Charlie was in full clothes in the lake, and his hat got wet.

[A]

I was hand fishing for sunnies.

[B]

But anyways, he. He wore the wet hat to the bar, which is a crazy move.

[A]

Well, my. My hair. I didn't shower this morning because of

[B]

my hair, but I have, like, 15 hats you could have wore to this.

[A]

Well, you saw me dip the hat in the water. I didn't hear you offering me a hat. How about I wear your hat? You wear my hat for this?

[B]

Why would I do that? That's like, the worst trade ever. Please, Joey's Charlie.

[A]

Please. Joiz. Miles, let's do it. Let's take some callers.

[B]

What do you say, Charlie?

[A]

Hi, Miles.

[B]

By late July, every cabin owner and lake goer is operating on pure confidence. I've been there. I've been operating on pure confidence.

[A]

Senior prop Miles.

[B]

Yeah. People know the route by heart. They're making the trip every weekend, and that's usually when they stop paying attention. You're doing more time looking for deer than looking at the road in front of you.

[A]

Mm, facts, factuals.

[B]

We're talking narrow roads, busy intersection, lots of boats, lots of trailers and drivers who think that they can shave a few minutes off the trip home.

[A]

And then you know what happens.

[B]

All it takes is one Mistake from someone else and a normal cabin weekend suddenly isn't so normal?

[A]

No, it's. It's abnormal, in fact.

[B]

And if accidents happen this lake season, call Nicolet Law. They're ready to help you.

[A]

1-855-Ladies and Gents. Nicolae. Thing I noticed about J Ray's Miles is they have super clear optics and slick style.

[B]

And for a guy like you, you need clear optics because you are constantly looking through glasses that are smudged and smeared and foggy, but never with the shady rays. What I'm saying is you got to be feeling pretty good wearing those.

[A]

I feel like I can see clearly now. My normal glasses are gone. I can see all the fishes in the pond because they're polarized, Miles. And that's what I love about these shady rays, dude. They're really slick, they're really sleek, they look cool. And, man, you'd be a fool not to get these shady rays. And you can just go on over to shady rays.com and all this deal. You get two or more. You get 50% off on these shady rays. That's a steal.

[B]

Just got to use code bellied up.

[A]

It's not an aluminum. It is a steal, ladies and gents. So get on over there and we'll see you soon.

[E]

Hello, Podcast.

[B]

This is Belly Podcast. Is this Tim?

[E]

Yes, sir, it is. How you doing, Mr. Miles?

[B]

I'm doing good. How? I got Charlie here with me too.

[A]

Tim, are you calling.

[E]

Hey, Mr. Charlie. Hey, Mr. Charlie.

[A]

Hey, Tim, are you calling from, like, France or something?

[E]

No, sir. No, sir. Alabama.

[A]

Alabama.

[B]

Okay. Man, I would have never have guessed.

[A]

That's a nice accent you got there.

[E]

And the town I live in, we are world famous for the very first place that 911 phone call was ever made.

[A]

No.

[E]

Look it up on Google. Look it up on Google Town. Haleyville.

[A]

Haleyville, home of the first 911 phone call.

[B]

Do we know what the phone call was for?

[E]

No, it was just a senator calling the telephone company just to do the deal, but they set up the very first number one phone line, so.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah, that's got to make you feel proud of where you're from.

[E]

Oh, yeah. We're getting ready next week to have a big 911 festival here in town.

[B]

And it's good to know that we. That that doesn't just happen in the Midwest.

[A]

No, that's good to know.

[B]

You guys are doing that down in Alabama as well.

[E]

Oh, exactly. And we got a pretty big country sanger coming down.

[A]

Who's that?

[E]

Aaron Tipping.

[A]

Okay, nice.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah, he's gonna be doing. He's gonna be the main act up on stage.

[A]

No kidding. How many people you expecting to come to that? 91 1.

[E]

Pretty close to a thousand.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Thousand.

[E]

Yeah. Somewhere around that.

[A]

Holy smokes. And do you guys. Do you guys have a thing where you play the top 10911 phone calls from that year?

[E]

No. No.

[B]

Does. Does anyone win in like a 911 award?

[E]

Yeah, we have big parade, we have the car shows, the tractor show, the bunch of beef set up. Big old Boston butt smoking contest deal there.

[A]

A Boston butt smoking contest? Yeah, you're gonna have to explain. I don't know. A Boston butt.

[E]

Well, it's basically barbecue, but you put it in a big old smoking machine.

[A]

Oh, okay. Yeah, I thought that was for a second, just people who did squats and smoked from the East Coast. Okay, all right.

[E]

But. Oh, I'm sorry. I was gonna ask Mr. Miles, how do I find your stand up comedy on YouTube?

[A]

Yeah, I've been looking for that too. Miles, how do we find that?

[B]

I. I don't do stand up comedy, believe it or not. So you're not missing anything.

[E]

Oh, man.

[B]

I know, I know. I got a kid.

[E]

Well, yeah, I understand. Yeah.

[A]

You can find Mr. Charlie's by just searching neighborly on YouTube and it pops.

[E]

Oh, yes, sir. I've watched both of yours so far.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Okay, well, here, let's maybe pitch a couple of special names that maybe for future that we. So we were actually talking about Charlie's potential specials in the future, trying to help him come up with names. So you did, you did Neighborly. Yep, you did.

[E]

What was the first one that was Old fashioned Goodbye. It was. Yeah, Midwest Goodbye.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And then that's something else I wanted to talk to y' all about.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[E]

Is Michigan considered the Midwest?

[A]

Absolutely. Yeah, Michigan's considered the Midwest.

[E]

Okay. Because I got a friend that lives in Michigan, and me and him. I was at. I was saying, I don't think Charlie Barrons and them think y' all are Midwest or not.

[A]

I like that you brought it up like that, but yeah, no, I mean, Michigan is connected to Wisconsin. And although that part should be part of Wisconsin, I won't go into that now, but yeah, Michigan is very much a part of the Midwest.

[B]

You ever thought about that? The up is kind of just like a leech attached to Wisconsin at the top, you know? Have you ever thought about it?

[E]

Like.

[A]

I've never thought about it like that.

[B]

You should use that as ammo next time you're talking to someone from Michigan they'll love if you tell them that they're a bunch of leeches.

[A]

You want me to take it kind of the other way?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. All right. All right.

[B]

Sucking all the blood out of you guys.

[A]

That's.

[E]

Yeah, well, that. I mean, hey, that's the same way with Canada. They should be part of the U.S.

[B]

so you're pro 51st state, then?

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

Okay. All right. Tim, what do you do for a living?

[E]

Well, right now I'm disabled because I got a traumatic brain injury.

[A]

Okay. All right. Sorry about that.

[B]

Tbi.

[E]

Oh, no, that's all right. I was working at a Walmart and had a real serious accident.

[A]

Oh, geez. What happened?

[E]

Well, I was climbing the tallest ladder we had in the store, getting a mountain bike off the ceiling. We had them hanging on s hooks, and when it came down on me, it went one way, I went the other way, and I hit my head on the corner of a wooden pallet.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[E]

I had to have four staples put in my head.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

Dang.

[E]

But I was talking to the nurses just like I'm talking to y', all, and they were like, wow, okay. Well, we. At least we know you can talk.

[B]

Yeah, that should give Nicolet Law call. Yeah.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. Well, that's been many years ago. That was around 2008, 2009, I think the statute of limitation is passed or whatever. Yeah, I tried to talk to several lawyers about it, so.

[A]

Yeah, and none of them. None of them were able to help you out, huh?

[E]

No, because it's been too far. Been. Been too long ago.

[A]

Dang.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Well, sorry about that.

[E]

Oh, no, that's all right. I just. I'm doing what I'm. I'm doing the best I can there, so.

[B]

Yeah, that's all you can do. It's all.

[E]

And listening to Charlie Baron stand up where I can laugh there.

[A]

Well, she's. Louise. How far are you from Birmingham, Tim?

[E]

About 100 miles.

[A]

Hundred miles? Is that too far of a drive for you?

[E]

No, not really.

[A]

All right, well, I'll hook you up with two tickets to my show coming up in Birmingham if you want it.

[E]

Okay. I'd have to have a way to pay in cash because I don't have a credit card or.

[A]

Tim, your cash is no good at my shows. Come on, you know that.

[E]

Thank you.

[A]

The tickets will be waiting for you at Will call. We'll just have you text Jared your full name and. Okay, Two tickets waiting there for you.

[E]

Two tickets. Okay, good, because I'm gonna Have to have a friend drive me down there because the doctors don't want me driving because of my seizures.

[A]

Oh.

[E]

Because of traumatic brain injury. So that's.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, that's good that you're doing too. Why don't you. Good.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You want more tickets there, Tim?

[E]

No, sir. As far as I know, I ain't really got nobody else that really wants to go down to Birmingham. I mean, it's a little bit of a rough place down there.

[A]

Is it? Okay, well, shoot. I mean, I didn't know. I thought.

[B]

This doesn't sound very neighborly.

[A]

No. When I was down, I was down there a couple years ago at the. Seem fun, but, you know, what do you know?

[E]

Well, there's certain parts, I guess, of Birmingham that are rougher than downtown.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

Downtown is like a show.

[B]

Downtown.

[A]

Sure is Downtown. Yeah. But you know, Tim, you can look it up on my website when the show is and where it's at, and either way, we'll put two tickets there for you.

[B]

If you are scared to, like, you run into some, you know, some rough crowd over, like, you don't, you can turn the tickets down.

[A]

Yeah, you don't. You don't have to.

[E]

No.

[B]

Good.

[E]

It's in downtown Birmingham. I'm good.

[A]

Okay. All right. We'll get you locked in. You just text your full name after this and we'll be locked and loaded. So what are you up to today, Tim?

[E]

I went and paid bills today and stuff. Just got my disability check and everything and went and had to pay some bills.

[A]

Okay. All right, nice. So you're feeling all dialed in, huh?

[E]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Tim, what do you like to do for fun?

[E]

Oh, I love to watch movies, go out and hunt and fish and dagum. Just go out and enjoy nature.

[A]

I love that, you big bass fisherman.

[E]

Oh, I love bass fish.

[A]

Is that your favorite species to catch?

[E]

Well, mostly I catch drum, but. Yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Bass drum is like one of the trash fish of the water that you. Yes. You're kind of unlucky to catch that,

[A]

but they put up a good fight, those drums.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[A]

Nice, nice.

[E]

Oh, yeah. What do y' all catch up there in Wisconsin?

[A]

Well, today I was trying to catch some sunfish by hand. Oh, I was noodling for him.

[E]

Oh, I've seen that stuff that I don't know if I'd be brave enough to be doing noodling.

[A]

Well, I wasn't really noodling. I wasn't. I was just trying to catch him by hand, but noodling is a whole intense thing. You stick your arm in there and then let God handle the rest.

[E]

Exactly. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. But I think one of my ideas, I called in about one of them days was how in the world does Yalls Plumbing deal with all that cheese and stuff y' all eat?

[A]

That's a really good question, Tim. That's a really good question. And the plumbing, you know, it really just relies on a little coleslaw. So sometimes it gets backed up, you know, the toilets here. But if you just flush a little coleslaw down, that breaks it up real good.

[B]

You eat coleslaw. So then it, like, levels out.

[E]

Yeah, that's kind of what I was thinking.

[B]

Some fiber in there. But no, you actually just flush coleslaw down the pipe.

[A]

Yep. It works the same way it does in your pipes, actually. And it'll just keep everything moving, you know?

[E]

Well, okay, cool. I was like. I'll. I was hearing y' all talk about a lot of cheese curds and stuff like that. Stuff like that. I don't know all the cheese stuff y' all got up there, but. Yeah.

[A]

Have you ever been up north, Tim?

[E]

I've been to Michigan one time. I lived up there one year.

[A]

Oh, what'd you think of it?

[E]

Well, the winter wasn't for me.

[A]

I bet not. I bet. What were you doing up there in Michigan?

[E]

I was just living up here for about a year. That's been the late 90s.

[A]

Okay. All right. Were you working at. Just living. Not working at a Walmart or anything.

[E]

No, I was in school. I was, like, in middle school, maybe.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

Or something like that. I went to the community school, and then they moved me to the big city school in Detroit, Michigan. And I was only. We'll just say I was of a different ethnicity. I got anybody than everybody else in the school.

[A]

I'm picking up what you're putting down, Tim.

[E]

Oh, yeah. I'm trying to be politically correct. Yeah.

[A]

I think you did a good job. I think.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. You locked it in. And so just one year up there, and then you went back down to Birmingham, huh?

[E]

Well, Haleyville. Yes.

[A]

Or. I'm sorry, I meant Alabama. I was talking more generally. But Hayetville.

[E]

Haleyville.

[A]

Haleyville.

[E]

Biggest city to us is Huntsville.

[A]

Huntsville. Okay. Just short.

[E]

Rocket City. Yeah, Rocket City.

[A]

Rocket City. Huntsville. Okay.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

We talked to a guy. We actually talked to a guy on this podcast who makes rockets in Huntsville, right?

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

That was the George Kennel episode.

[B]

Yeah. With George Kittle.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. We. They're doing big stuff with the government down there with the like space program and stuff. They're building a whole new facility down there and stuff.

[A]

Would you go live in space, Tim?

[E]

Probably not.

[A]

Yeah, that'd be a tough sell, I think.

[E]

Yeah. Nah, I'm pretty used to being down here.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know why you have Earth with all the cool stuff we have here. And you look up at the moon, which is pretty, pretty barren, and you're like, what if we go live up there, you know?

[E]

Oh yeah, exactly.

[A]

It's like looking at the Taj Mahal and saying what if we. What if we go lived in that shack down by the river, you know?

[E]

Yeah, exactly. But I love also them light cabins and stuff we got around here and stuff. Yeah, we got.

[A]

You got lake cabins down there too, huh?

[E]

Oh, yes sir. Down around Smith Lake, Alabama? Well, it's a rich part of the area and stuff. A lot of big mansion type lighthouses and stuff down there and stuff.

[A]

Yeah. Is that old money down there, Tim, or new money?

[E]

Yeah. Basically old money. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. Where's that old Alabama money come from?

[E]

Well, I'm not really for sure. Probably more likely. More. More likely coal mining. Probably coal mining?

[A]

Why? What do you think I was missing, Miles?

[E]

Well, I was thinking what Miles was thinking.

[A]

Yeah, what?

[E]

I ain't going to talk about it on air because I don't want to offend.

[A]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[B]

They got plan, right?

[A]

Okay, okay. All right, all right.

[E]

The cotton industry.

[A]

Did you literally just ask someone where the old money from Alabama came from? Stop, stop. We can put this, Put this in Charlie's worst bets. Put this in Charlie's brain fart. That was such a dumb question. Wow. I am an idiot, Tim. Holy smokes.

[E]

Hey, that's all right. We're probably around the same age. I'm. I'm pretty close to yalls age. I think I'm around 37 year old.

[A]

37?

[B]

Charlie's older than you are.

[A]

I'm older than you.

[E]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Did you think that he was older or younger than you, Charlie?

[E]

I thought y' all were my age, Tim.

[A]

I, you know, you got. You got a. An accent that you could put you anywhere from 27, 75.

[E]

Hey, hey, that's fine with me.

[B]

Are you. Are you in Roll Tide country or are you in Auburn?

[E]

Yes, sir. Roll Tide. Roll.

[B]

Okay, all right.

[E]

All the way, all the way. The war eagle is a bad word in my household.

[B]

Okay, good to know, Good to know.

[E]

Oh yeah. But also for NFL and I'm probably gonna make Charlie mad with this. And he'll probably take away the tickets.

[A]

But don't tell me you're a Bears fan, Tim.

[E]

Yes, sir, unfortunately.

[A]

Why?

[E]

Because my mom from Chicago, Illinois.

[A]

Okay. All right. Well, you got a familial tie, and you can't. Some things you can't. You can't help some things you're born with. And I guess that's it, you know, there are time in your life to make, you know, make amends. Make amends. Start a new life decision.

[E]

Oh, yeah. But I don't know if I could be a cheese head or not. I mean, I don't know.

[A]

You got a lady in your life there, Tim?

[E]

Yeah, I got one I've been talking to and stuff.

[A]

All right.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Where's she from?

[E]

She's from around here in Hable. We got several small towns around here, but Halibu's, like, the biggest in this area and stuff, so. But yeah, either way it goes, she's from here and stuff. We go to movies every once in a while and go out to eat and stuff like that.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Are you gonna maybe take her to the Charlie Barron Show?

[E]

Well, I was thinking about it, but I also got one of my good friends that. He likes comedy quite a bit, too.

[B]

There we go.

[E]

Yeah, she. She's. She works all the time and stuff.

[A]

Yeah. What does she do?

[E]

She is in the paper industry down here.

[A]

Okay. There you go.

[B]

What. What is it? What does that mean?

[A]

She's working at the paper plant.

[B]

Like, paper mill?

[E]

Yeah, the paper mill.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

They. They basically make printer paper and stuff like that.

[A]

It's a booming business.

[B]

It's a dying business, actually.

[A]

Doesn't it smell really bad?

[E]

Yeah, it is a dying business. But also, I've also got one of my brothers that works at a paper plant that they print up, like, the beer containers, like that holds the beer and stuff in it.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[E]

They make the cardboard for all that. Stuff like that.

[B]

Well, that ain't going away.

[A]

No.

[E]

Oh, no, definitely not. My. My beer choices of coolers.

[A]

Coors Banquet beers.

[B]

Is it because you say it's so cool? You know Coors?

[E]

Well, hey, I got that from old Smokey and the Bandit Burgers.

[B]

There you go. All right. This next segment is called Charlie Barron's Tries a Southern accent to a Southerner. And Tim's gonna judge Charlie's Southern accent.

[E]

Wow.

[A]

Okay. All right.

[B]

We do this every time we have a Southerner on Tim. Are you okay with Charlie doing a Southern accent and then you telling them how good, bad, or otherwise it is?

[E]

Oh, yeah. Give it Your best shot, Charlie.

[A]

How you doing there, tm?

[E]

That was okay.

[A]

Y' all doing all right down there, Tim?

[E]

Yeah. I think you need to spend a little bit more time down here, and then you'll get.

[A]

Damn. I thought that was okay. Miles, you try.

[B]

Give. Give him a phrase to say. Maybe it's a phrase he's not getting right. Give him a Southern phrase.

[E]

Just try saying y'. All.

[A]

Y'. All.

[E]

Y'. All.

[A]

Say it again, Tim.

[E]

Y'. All. Y'. All. Yeah, you're. You're doing all right with it. Yeah.

[A]

You're doing all right with it.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

How is that, Tim?

[E]

Yeah, it was pretty good. Yeah.

[A]

Maybe I should just try to emulate you, Tim.

[B]

Yeah, it's actually working pretty good.

[E]

Yeah. Even have me up on stage.

[B]

Oh, yeah. We'll go down to Birmingham, about a hundred miles from Haleysville, and we'll get up on stage with that old Chuck Bob Barrons and have ourselves a rootin tootin time. How's that?

[E]

That's right. We'll. We'll get her done down there, Tim.

[A]

What do you think of Miles's Southern accent there?

[E]

His was pretty good, too. Yeah.

[B]

Let's go.

[A]

Tim's got that Midwest.

[B]

Now, Tim. Now, Tim, I want you to do a Midwestern accent. I'd love to hear your.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

Let's see here. Well, don't. You know. Well, that wouldn't. Hold on here.

[B]

Say, oh. Oh, yeah, you bet. Yeah, Watch out for de.

[E]

Oh, yeah, you bet. Yeah. Watch out for deer.

[A]

Getting there.

[B]

You gotta really hold on to the O's, Tim, so.

[A]

Yeah, we're all about the bowels here.

[E]

Oh, yeah, you betcha. Watch out for deer, Tim.

[A]

You're almost a Midwesterner, dude.

[B]

That was pretty good.

[E]

I'd love to go up her and spend some time.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, we'll get you. We'll get you up there, Tim. That'd be fun.

[B]

Yeah, we'll get you tickets to every single one of Charlie Barron's show. And you can just travel.

[E]

Y' all have to buy me plane tickets, though, too, so.

[A]

Yeah, sure. You can be like my. My. My groupie.

[E]

There you go. I'll be the guy that handles taking the money for your autograph when people get you autographs at the show.

[A]

There you go. You can just sign my autograph and just tell them it's been signed. How's that sound? You can start an outside business.

[E]

Yeah, yeah. I've been looking for one of your shirts, but I ain't found one of them yet.

[A]

No. Well, shoot. Maybe I'LL bring you one when you come down to the show. What size are you, Tim?

[E]

I'm a medium.

[A]

Medium, all right. Or a medium?

[E]

Yeah, medium.

[B]

You know what's crazy to me is I knew a guy worked for my dad. He would come up from southern Illinois to work. And did you know that your Alabama accent sounds a lot like the southern Illinois accent, even though you guys aren't even that close together? Have you ever heard that before?

[E]

No, I've never heard that. No.

[B]

Tim, do you know people from southern Illinois?

[A]

Yeah, Southern.

[E]

Well, I used to. I used to work at a telephone company where we. It was a cable company, but we were the customer service cable company, and the cable company was up north, like in the northern part of the states and stuff, and it was called. Wow. Internet, cable and phone. Did y' all ever have that?

[A]

Wow. No.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

No.

[E]

Oh, okay. Yeah, I talked to, like, all types of people from, like, Chicago and New York and Michigan and stuff like that. They said, boy, your accent just calms us down so much because we're used to rude people and all this. That especially the people from New York. Just people are rude up there, according to people that live in New York.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I went to New York one time, and I don't ever want to go back here.

[A]

What brought you up to New York?

[E]

My senior trip. We went in school on our senior trip. Anyways, I watched a New York City police officer fly through the air and tackle street fence. Wow. That I was buying something off of. I was buying something off the street vendor. And then the New York City police officer. All I heard was, freeze, Put your hands up. So I just did what I was told.

[A]

And you dropped the bag of drugs.

[E]

No, I got. I dropped a DVD player. A portable DVD player.

[A]

Well, anyway, that kind of a street vendor.

[B]

Bootlegging.

[E]

Yes, sir.

[A]

You're buying some of this guy's. I thought you were buying a hot dog or something.

[B]

A senior in high school. You're in New York and you're buying. You're buying stolen DVD players?

[E]

I wouldn't ask. No question. I was just. Hey, I don't know where it came from, what it was. He just had it for sale.

[A]

How much was it? You remember?

[E]

I can't even remember.

[A]

Did you get pinched for buying stolen merchandise?

[E]

No, sir, because the police officer came up beside me and told me to put my hands down. And then I watched him, like, fly through the air like an NFL tackler or whatever, and tackle that street vendor to the ground.

[A]

Wow, that's impressive.

[E]

Yeah, I was like, he just told me to get out of there. Police officer told me that I was like, okay.

[B]

When I was in New York as a kid, I was maybe 12 or something, my parents bought bootleg movies off of a street vendor out of a suitcase.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And I remember when we got home, we popped in the Polar Express on the. On the DVD player and the audio was a little funky. And all of a sudden, you know, about a third of the way in, all of a sudden we see a human just stand up. We see a shadow of someone walking in front of the screen.

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

So we bought. We bought pirated DVDs that someone recorded the movies in the movie theater. Because we're like, you can't even get these on DVD yet. How do you have them?

[E]

Yeah, the pirates and DVDs. Eyeball was the ones that had like the numbers at the bottom of the screen. Oh, yeah, you can tell it was like it wasn't a real movie or whatever. Or it was like a print off somebody else's film or something like that.

[A]

You had the time codes at the bottom.

[E]

Yeah, that's what it had. It had like the time codes at the bottom and stuff.

[A]

Those were like Stol. Editor of the film.

[E]

Yeah, I guess so. But I bought them off some guy in New York. So I was like, okay. But we had a. We had one street vendor that tried to steal purses back from one of our teachers that was buying person. He was selling like fake Louis Vuitton and all that stuff down there. And anyways, he hired a little kid to go around and steal the bags back from the customers that bought them.

[B]

That's. That's a good, Pretty good business.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Also, let's not, let's not go past the fact that your teacher is the chaperone on this trip and she's buying fake Louis Vuitton purses.

[E]

Well, wait until you hear the scheme she came up with.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[E]

She found out that the kid was doing that. So she called us all around her and was like, hey, y' all go. One of y' all go and buy purses like normal. And the rest of y', all, while they're buying the purses, y' all go up and just start taking the persons from the street vendors table.

[A]

Your teacher was teaching you this?

[E]

Yes, and gave us all big old 50 gallon, like heavy duty trash bags to put them in. We left with like 10 garbage bags.

[A]

Shut up. Shut up.

[E]

Yeah, it was crazy.

[A]

This is some real Alabama here.

[E]

Well, hey, we wouldn't go get took. I Mean, there you go.

[B]

Yeah. Then he's like, you find out. You're like, yeah. I don't know. It was. You know, it was just our quad annual trip to New York that we would do as a school, you know, and the teachers just running a racket, just getting kids to steal purses so she'd come back and sell them to people.

[E]

No, she only did it because the street vendor hired that kid to go steal. Kill the purser for money.

[A]

I see. I see.

[B]

Okay. All right.

[A]

Hey, you know, if they paid teachers more money, she wouldn't have had to find a side hustle. I think she knew that was happening and was looking for an excuse.

[E]

Well, and plus, it was her last year at the school anyways. She was retiring at the end of

[A]

the year, so she gave.

[B]

She had a case of this senioritis.

[E]

Yeah, Way right. All seniors, the teachers and everything. Yeah. And then in the chapel building, my congressman down here in Alabama got me in trouble. Out of trouble up there. I had to go to the restroom. And the tour guide was being a smart ella, because I asked, where's the restroom? And she pointed up to the sign and said, can't you read? So I said, yes, ma', am, I can. And I went into the restroom. I didn't think nothing of the. And when I came back out, a Secret Service guy was waiting on me outside. He's like, you gotta come with me. And I said, no, sir, I don't. My mom said, don't go with strangers. And I don't see no ID on you saying that you're Secret Service. So we sat there and argued about it for a little while. And then my congressman, a hole from Alabama, Robert Ayerhole, he walked up and talked to the guy and then got. Took me back to my group and everything.

[A]

Oh, wait, why now?

[E]

I went into a congressman's bathroom.

[B]

Got it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, he went to a congressman's bathroom on accident.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Well, yeah, Secret Service was like.

[E]

Was man. They got like a penthouse for their background bathroom. I mean, it was fancy.

[B]

They don't even. They don't even have hand towels. You use these thick napkins to wipe your hands and throw.

[E]

They had like embroidered hand towels in there and the whole nine yards. Leather couches, flat screen TVs on the wall, gold fixtures and all this stuff.

[A]

That's where the tax money goes.

[E]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I seen something I shouldn't have seen, I guess.

[B]

Yeah, I just thought of something. You said you're from the home of the first 911 call correct, Tim?

[E]

Yeah. Yes.

[B]

Charlie's got a bit in his special about we don't call 911 around here.

[E]

Yeah, we usually don't neither down here. We take care of it between each other.

[B]

Okay. Because I was gonna say it's like you guys actually do because that's your whole shtick, you know what I mean?

[E]

Oh, yeah. Well, we got an official 911 phone call line set up, but I don't know how much it gets.

[A]

That's funny. Home of the 911 festival. Never calls 91 1. Do you pack there, Tim? You're packing heat Pack? Yeah. You got a pistol on your person?

[E]

Oh, well, yeah. I mean, I. I can't have a gun, but. Yeah, they were allowed to have guns and stuff down here.

[A]

Got you, got you. Okay. Yeah. With the traumatic brain injury and whatnot.

[E]

Yeah, can't have. Yeah, they told me, like, no. No driving. No, like, operating heavy machinery or anything like that or nothing like that. I'm like, well, okay, okay, that makes sense. But, yeah, luckily, I've got good people around here, take me places and stuff.

[A]

That's great, man. Do you have a bicycle?

[E]

Yes, sir, I do.

[A]

How do you like riding that?

[E]

Yeah, it's pretty cool. I don't wear the bicycle outfit that y' all talk about all the time.

[B]

That's.

[A]

That's a big win there for you.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You ever tried it on, though? Just when no one's watching?

[E]

No, no, I ain't gonna end up watching that song show.

[A]

Yeah, that's. That's how it happened. He was just wearing too tight as shorts.

[B]

Yeah, he lost a nut from blood circulation.

[A]

That was a rumor going around there.

[E]

Yeah, I. I wouldn't doubt it. I wouldn't doubt it one bit,

[A]

man,

[E]

but, yeah, I can't wait to see you in Birmingham, Mr. Charlie.

[A]

Well, that sounds good, Mr. Tim. I'm looking forward to it. And, yeah, maybe. Maybe I'll bring you a DVD player or something. How does that sound?

[E]

Yes, sir. It'll have to be a Blu ray this time.

[A]

Okay. All right, sounds good, man. Well, I'm looking. I'm looking forward to it. And on your way there, watch out for those deer. Okay.

[E]

Yeah, y' all watch out for there, too. Now they'll just run out right in front of your car down here, so.

[A]

All right, well, yeah, sounds. Sounds good, Tim. Be good, my guy.

[E]

Yes, sir. Y', all, too. And catch you later.

[A]

All right,

[B]

team. Seems like a good guy.

[A]

I don't know, Miles. I thought my Southern accent was pretty gosh darn Good.

[B]

Well, I'm not sure about that, Chuck, but Tim seems like a darn good guy.

[A]

Sure seems like a good old fell Donnie mouse.

[B]

Yes. You know, it's. He's had a stroke of not good luck in his life with the tbi.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But it seems like he's making the most of it.

[A]

He's doing his thing. I love the attitude there. I'm excited to meet him in person.

[D]

How's it going, guys?

[A]

It's going good. Pat, belly up to the bar. Tell us what's on your mind.

[D]

All right, guys. So got a little. A little predicament there with my cousin.

[B]

Oh, no. Are you from Alabama?

[E]

No.

[B]

Okay. No, just. Just want to kind of predicament what you're looking at here.

[D]

Oh, so somebody wound up dead.

[A]

What?

[D]

Found him in his. In the dead dude's car.

[A]

Wait, wait, wait.

[B]

Hold on.

[A]

Back to back. Back the Corolla up here.

[D]

How far are we going back?

[B]

So you said that you're who found who dead.

[D]

All right, so my cousin was found in a dead guy's car a few days after he was murdered.

[A]

Okay, well, got it. But that's not good. Not how you like to see it go down.

[D]

Yeah, exactly. You know. Did it kill him? He can't tell me.

[B]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's probably smart.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yep. So, you know, but my pretty good comment is that he helped me raise my kids here, you know, So I got a 14, a 12, and a 6 year old, so it's kind of hard trying to explain them. I can't really spend too much time with them no more, you know?

[B]

Yeah, that makes sense. So, okay, so they found him in a car, dead. A dead guy's car.

[A]

Die of natural causes?

[D]

No.

[A]

Okay, How'd he die?

[D]

So the police report that I read, because he can't tell me nothing, you know, pretty much said that he was. It was a crime of hat passion of some sort.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Blunt force trauma is what you're saying.

[D]

Yeah, Yeah, I think so.

[A]

And was.

[B]

So. Okay, so where is your cousin now? Is he. Is he being charged with something?

[D]

Yep. Yeah, he got sentenced to 30 years down in Corpus Christi, Texas.

[B]

So he's. It's wang bat. Wham, bam, thank you, ma'. Am. He's going away.

[D]

Yeah, it's been. Yeah, it's been about two years since we found out.

[B]

Oh, boy, that's tough. That's really tough.

[D]

We found out on my wedding day too, which is really rough.

[A]

Oh, geez, man. That's not how you want to write

[B]

pretty close with this guy.

[D]

Oh, yeah. So he moved in with me when I was, like, 12 years old. He had a lot of problems growing up. Like, he ate a bunch of drugs when he was like, 3 years old, and it messed him up really bad. He had a stutter. Well, he still does, but, you know, and people pick on him for it and, you know, kid had a rough life in and out of the foster homes and stuff, too, so.

[A]

Oh, boy.

[D]

Yeah, he lived with me from when I was 12 till about a year before he moved back down to Texas. It's kind of rough. Yeah.

[A]

So was. Was he dating this person or was this person someone he was dating?

[D]

What I understand is that it was his grandpa's roommate, but Pockets had a tendency to just take off in people's cars.

[A]

Pockets?

[D]

Yes, it's been Pockets since the day that I met him.

[A]

Why? Why do you call him Pockets?

[D]

I don't know. That's just. What? I don't know, man. His real name is Dylan, but nobody calls. Nobody who knows him calls him Dylan.

[A]

Judge called him Dylan.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Yup. Yup.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

Yep. You know it?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. Geez. So you're saying that you said he has a tendency to take off in people's cars?

[E]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

I don't. Yeah, I don't know exactly what that means.

[D]

Well, you know, if you leave your keys in your car and he's around and you're not using it, he might.

[B]

Is his name Pockets? Because you should put your keys in your pockets instead of in the car.

[D]

Maybe. Maybe.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. But, you know, got caught doing that a few times at, like, a Walmart, you know, downtown Escanaba, where we live. But, yeah, you know, but I didn't call just to share, you know, the bad part. Say, we got a few funny stories with them if you want.

[A]

Yeah, let's. Let's remember Pockets for.

[B]

Let's remember the good stuff.

[D]

Yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I mean, is it insensitive for me to ask if you think that he didn't?

[D]

To be honest, I don't think he did. But he doesn't talk like he doesn't speak to anybody. No police officers, no nothing.

[A]

So this was a guy that lived with his grandpa?

[D]

Yeah, he lived with his. His grandpa would. Grandpa woods got real bad dementia, so he was taking care of them. And then he just had a roommate, too, who is elderly as well.

[B]

Okay, all right.

[A]

So he killed an elderly person.

[D]

I. That's what. That's what he's charged. That's what he's charging.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Huh.

[B]

And before we do go down memory lane with Pockets, I do want to.

[A]

Would you call it memory lane?

[B]

That's what he wanted.

[A]

Dementia.

[B]

Put that on my good bit list. I didn't even try. I do want to just put it out there. You want us to sit and remember the fun good times that you had with Pockets? Who is the guy who is put away in the clink for 30 years for murder.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Of an elderly person with dementia.

[E]

It will.

[D]

No, no, no, no. Grandpa woods still. Still here.

[A]

Okay. But his roommate, Grandpa woods on your camera.

[B]

The caretaker of your grandpa with dementia.

[D]

No, no, no, no. Just the roommate.

[B]

Just the roommate. Okay.

[A]

Who did not have dementia.

[D]

I didn't know. Hey, I. I didn't talk to him that whole year that he was in Texas because he didn't, you know.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

But when he got mental issues, a little hard to keep a phone on you and all that other stuff, so just.

[B]

I just want to say that that's. You want us to start talking about all the good memories with the guy.

[D]

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. He saved my life a few times.

[A]

Let's talk about that. Let's talk about

[D]

saved my life. He actually saw I'm a bud tender in Menominee, Michigan, even though I live up, you know, about an hour away from there. But if he wouldn't have been in my life, I wouldn't be able to hold the job there or the nursing home that I'm at because I had a little booger sugar problem back in the day. He went and told him it was his and kept my record clean and.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[D]

Help me raise, you know, and then he. You know, after doing all that sitting time for stuff for me, he still came and helped me raise my kids, you know?

[B]

Yeah, I. I imagine there's got to be some. A little bit of guilt with that, right? I mean, basically exactly. Like, he did time for you.

[D]

Oh, yeah. Yep. I mean, I paid for everything, you know, I paid all the fines, I did all the, you know, helped him with the, you know, classes and stuff that came with it, because it was like, maybe fifteen hundred dollars in fines with his probation. So, you know.

[B]

So. Yeah, I mean, this is, like, for you. This is an emotional, like. Like roller coaster. You know what I mean? Like, I mean, are you in therapy? No, you know, we. We don't recommend therapy on this podcast very much. We usually tell you just go talk to your bartender, but. But, I mean, you might benefit from talking to someone about it. And I don't know if Charlie and I Are equipped for that.

[A]

But here we are. Miles.

[B]

But here we are. We're gonna give us. Give it the old college try.

[D]

Yup, yup, yup. I gotcha. I'm not, you know, I gotta. I got conflicting feelings about it and, you know. But I kind of. Kind of called to give you some. Some fun stories.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

So. Yeah. Just kidding me. You know, I've known him since I was 12 years old. We started choking the smart, if you know what I mean, back when I was real young.

[A]

What.

[B]

You know what that means? I don't know if that.

[A]

No. What is it like together?

[D]

Poking smart. You know, like giggle bush.

[A]

Nope.

[B]

Oh, oh, oh, he's poking smart.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

He's smoking pot.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

Kind of like Lee's Joiz.

[A]

I thought you guys. I thought you guys were.

[B]

That could be a special name, huh? Poking spots spot.

[D]

Poking smart. Yep. That's what we say back in the day.

[A]

Got it.

[D]

But yeah, so. Okay, but so we. We would make bongs and play Super Mario Brothers for what, maybe like five, six hours at a time?

[B]

That's.

[E]

We made a.

[D]

We made a Zippo bong. So you take a can of Zippo later fluid, once you use it all up, you empty it. You take the top off, you put a trumpet mouthpiece on there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, just. Just all stuff you just got laying around the house.

[D]

I was 14, he was 17.

[A]

You know, the amount of chemicals in that concoction, you just. Are you sucking on the top of the Zippo bottle?

[D]

Well, no, no, it's empty.

[A]

I know it's empty.

[D]

But the, you know, you rinse it out with. Oh, yeah, you rinse it out with some water.

[A]

Never mind. My bad.

[D]

Know. Yeah, you don't go right for it, guys.

[A]

Yeah, because a little flammable in there too. You might.

[E]

Yep, yep.

[B]

So you got the. The bottle, the. The trumpet mouthpiece. Was there another portion that I'm missing?

[D]

Just a straw, you know, Straw to, you know, to pull the air out.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Oh, there you go. Yeah, that's creative.

[D]

It looked like a little hookah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. That wasn't the only one. We broke two bongs and glued. Super glued them together so we had like two places to light it. You know, that was. That was entertaining. But he used to have a house where I'd go sell weed and I'd come over there with like maybe a pound, half pound. Sometimes I'd leave with like maybe an ounce or so, but they go ahead and we'd smoke all there. Well, one time we had a big Party and this, this girl was there and she'd been drinking a lot. And we woke up in the morning and I saw her go to this. So they had broken the toilet there and they just left it in the hallway. And someone put a Captain Morgan bottle there, right? So turns out it was Pockets. Someone was in the bathroom. It filled up the bottle secondarily, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

Pockets pissed in the Captain Morgan bottle.

[A]

That I figured.

[C]

That I figured.

[B]

You're looking at me like you didn't know what he's saying,

[D]

but. And then this girl, she must have been having a real bad hangover or something. She went ahead, she picked her up and gave her a fat swig. Oh my God.

[E]

And call.

[D]

She screams. I hear him come half, half naked out of his room. He's like, oh, I put it in the toilet so nobody drink it. Like that was like. That was the level of intelligence that house for a little while.

[E]

Wow.

[A]

I mean, hey, talk about the memories, man. We are, we are really going down memory lane.

[B]

It's weird that you ended up being a bud tender later on in life.

[A]

I would have not pinned you for a bud tender.

[D]

No, honestly, I'm. I'm an award winning cannabis extractor too.

[A]

Wow. Are you? What award did you win?

[D]

The High Times Cannabis Cup.

[A]

Holy smokes. Did you really?

[D]

Cannabis Industry, 2023 in Michigan. It was the first one that they let people like choose. Yeah, they voted me in and you know, I got her. So.

[B]

People choice. So what makes you have that good kush? What's the key?

[E]

Good?

[D]

Oh, honestly, you know, the big, the big thing that makes a big difference is going to be how like wet the stuff is when you run it. You want to run her wet, you don't want to dry her out.

[B]

Yeah, I heard that before.

[A]

Spoken like a true smart poker miles.

[D]

Oh, yeah. Well, you know, there's, there's a lot of terpene loss when you dry your plant out. You're losing about 90% of your terpene.

[A]

Terpenes are.

[D]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. And then, so if you run it live, you preserve all that. And then the other cannabinoids that normally convert in like the processes. So Delta 9 comes from THCA and if you process it sometimes during the purging process to get all the gas and stuff out of it, you know, it's going to be a little bit less destructive to the product. If that makes sense.

[B]

That makes total sense.

[A]

So you are the guy when you

[B]

purge the THCA with the Delta 9 and the gas?

[E]

No, you purge.

[D]

You purge the gas out of miles.

[B]

Listen, my bad.

[A]

So you're kind of the reason that people go around saying, you know, the pot these days is not like the pot I was smoking in high school.

[D]

Honestly. We say that, but, like, in a. Well, the pot in high school was actually way better.

[A]

Why?

[D]

So most of the stuff I was getting was from my family, so I'm actually third generation for this.

[A]

Oh.

[D]

But like, we use organic methods to grow everything, and then we wouldn't over dry anything either.

[A]

There you go. So you're. You. You're used to the good stuff?

[D]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I always have been.

[A]

So it's a family business. Was your grandpa then.

[D]

Yep, my grandpa still grows.

[A]

Good for him.

[D]

Yup, yup, yup. My. My uncle's all grow. I got six of them. Nothing like your. Nothing like your bunch there, Charlie, though.

[A]

No, but no one's growing pot in my family yet. Yet.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

So here's a question. Has it helped the family business or hurt the family business that it's, like, legal now in places?

[C]

So it.

[D]

It. You know, we don't sell what we used to, we don't grow what we used to, but at the same time, we're not in it for the business. We've always kind of been in it for the. It's a bonding aspect. There's a lot of other things going on there too.

[A]

Like just getting high?

[D]

No, no, not just that. You know, we have to prep all the plants, we got to make the teas, we got to have, you know, animals around that you got to take care of to. To have fertilizer and stuff, you know, we don't just grow pot.

[E]

Right.

[B]

No, I know, but do you sell it?

[E]

Not anymore.

[B]

So as soon as it went legal, you guys stopped selling it?

[D]

Pretty much, yeah.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

Just lost all your profit margins, you know.

[D]

Well, I mean, but that, you know, we're still growing it at home and having. We're allowed to have a lot more than we used to, which is really nice.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

All right.

[A]

What, is Delta 8 really as bad as every gas station makes it seem.

[D]

Okay, so to be honest, Delta 8 is a different isomer of a THC. So it all comes from THCA for the most part. Now, the big difference between the two is there's, like a different angle on the chemical tail that doesn't produce the psychedelic effect.

[A]

So how come, you know, when you take Delta 8, though, you feel like you. You're. I mean, some of that stuff's kind of strong. What is the Chemical they're putting in it.

[D]

Well, there might be a up to 10% by weight of Delta 9 or THCA, which will get you high.

[A]

Okay, got it.

[B]

Yeah, it's kind of like you can have 0.5 grams of sugar in a drink, but if it's not a full gram of sugar, they can just put. Put zero grams on the bottom.

[A]

Exactly, exactly.

[D]

But, I mean, that's also like. It's 0.03% of the weight. That's federally legal. So, like, you know, say you have something that weighs a thousand grams. You're only allowed to have, like, 0.003 of a milligrams of THC in it. Makes sense.

[B]

Yep.

[D]

Yeah, but I mean, you know, on a cookie or something, that ain't nothing.

[B]

Yeah. Okay.

[D]

All right. I'm walking around on Mackinac island, so I'm a little out of. Out of breath.

[A]

Oh, that's okay. It's not the weed you've been smoking your whole life, huh?

[D]

No, actually, I. You know, I don't have too many problems with that. I get allergic. Asthma really bad, though, from other things. Like if I go out in the woods for too long.

[A]

Yeah, I promise. Yeah, no, that's. That's fun. So, yeah, you do you talk to pockets much these days?

[D]

Yeah, I talk to him about once every two weeks,

[B]

does. Okay, here's a question. What, is he in a prison in Texas?

[D]

Yep.

[B]

Okay. Maybe we'll have to expand our chapter of prison pals. Jared. Texas.

[D]

Well, so that's what really hurts, too, is that, like, nothing's free to communicate. Like, I can't even send them a letter in the mail, which would still cost, you know, a few bucks in an envelope. But, you know, like, they. Every call is like 15 bucks.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, they. No one can send mail for free.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

But.

[D]

But no. Yeah, it's just real hard with the having to pay for every little thing. And then on top of that, you know, it's just me and my little brother that pretty much take care of them. You know, we send them 50 bucks when we can, here and there.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, you know.

[A]

Yeah, that's. That's tough, man.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

When you said it was a murder of passion, though, like, so, I don't

[D]

know, like, there were no weapons. There was nothing. Like, I guess it was just like, maybe. Maybe he hit his head on something.

[E]

I don't know.

[A]

But I mean, were they. Was it. Was he with his girlfriend or something?

[D]

No. So, okay, now my. Honest to God there, because, dude, I'VE seen Pockets get his ass beat hard and wake up in the morning after, you know, letting the dude beat his ass, and then get up and party with him the whole next day, no problem. Like, they were like, nothing ever happened. And, like, my little brother, I don't know what happened there. Neither one of them will tell me. But one time, my little brother Cole, who's even younger than me, he's like 10 years younger in pockets. They got into a disagreement or whatever. Cole showed up at my house covered in blood from, you know, to the nose to the tits, you know, covered in blood. And I'm like, what the hell is going on, dude? He said, he's in the alley. Go find him. Him. And he had busted his nose, his jaw, cheek, and his leg and just left him there.

[A]

Left pockets there?

[D]

Yeah, left pockets there. Bleeding, all busted up and, you know, like, beat the hell. And, you know, about a week later, they were talking to each other and. Fine, you know, so I don't really think he did it. So

[B]

maybe your brother did it.

[D]

No, my brother was. My brother's up here in Michigan. Yeah, he's a different story. Oh, my God.

[A]

Pockets took the fall for you. Do you think Pockets took the fall for someone else down there in Texas?

[D]

That. Yeah, that's kind of a possibility. You know, track record being there. He's not a violent guy. He's never hit me. We've had our fights and stuff, but, you know, and him. Him and my brother, like. Like I said, he left him bloody broken. And they're fine. Like, they still. Like, he still talks to them both. They talk more than I do to him right now because Close has got more free time. I'm working three jobs.

[B]

So what does the court say happened? You know, obviously got sentenced and all that.

[D]

I haven't been able to get the FOIA on that yet. I'm trying to. It's gonna cost, like, 500 bucks for all the court papers, evidence, and stuff like that.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

You guys use the horses in the background?

[A]

Is that what those are?

[D]

Yep.

[A]

Nay. Oh, there it goes. I hear the clacking.

[D]

Clickety clacky.

[C]

There's a snort.

[A]

Are you getting a carriage ride right now?

[D]

Nope, they're just walking.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Are you an Amish country?

[A]

No, I'm Mackinac. Mackinac Island. You ever been there? No, it's up in Michigan.

[D]

Hey, also, talking about I'm a Youper. You guys ain't ever coming this way or.

[A]

Yeah, it sounds like the place to be, man.

[D]

Really is.

[B]

Here's I gotta run this by you as a yper. Charlie was going on earlier about how basically the up is just a leech on top of Wisconsin.

[A]

I didn't say this at all. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I didn't say do not. Do not. Don't tell your brother.

[E]

Okay?

[A]

I. I said, oh, go ahead. No, I said, I wish it was part of Wisconsin. Miles called it a leech on Wisconsin.

[B]

If you look at it kind of looks like that.

[E]

If.

[D]

If we didn't. If you guys had legal lead, I would push to be part of Wisconsin, to be honest.

[A]

Well, it's too late.

[D]

Everything.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Give us time. We need a few people to get less bribes and then we. We'll have it happen.

[D]

Hey, I've been telling people, dude, get that tavern link to be the only people who can sell it.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's probably what it would take, honestly.

[D]

But it's a good idea, right? It's something. I'd rather have something than nothing.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. And you have made quite the case for the legal weed in Wisconsin. What are you doing? Are you there up there with your family, taking a little vacation?

[D]

My. My. My oldest, my daughter and my middle son, they're both Boy Scouts. And they work. They work Mackinac island every year. This is Miranda's fourth year, and this is James's second year.

[A]

Okay. Is the wife up there with.

[B]

Hold on. Are they letting girls into the Boy Scouts now or she doing girls?

[D]

Yeah. Bro don't. Like to be honest. I'm really proud of her because she's almost an Eagle Scout already.

[B]

Wow. No, I just. That was actually a genuine question. I didn't know if they were doing that now.

[D]

Yeah. And I had. I had little problems with it, but when she was in Girl Scouts, it was just boring. They were selling stuff and learning how to dance and stuff. Yeah. Oh, yeah, I do. Girl Scout sucks.

[B]

Okay. I mean, they got great cookies. They got great cookies.

[D]

But, you know, the Scouts could just start selling those too, because. Yeah. Nobody buys Boy Scout popcorn anymore.

[A]

The Boy Scouts put zero creativity into their sales. Yeah, it doesn't matter. It's not about selling stuff. It's about making those little cars, you know? Yeah.

[D]

Yep.

[B]

Oh, all right. So why don't they. So they just call it the Scouts now?

[D]

Yes. Yep. Scouting. Scouting of America.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Which is not a good initial because it's just essay.

[A]

Soa.

[D]

No, just.

[A]

What's the other meaning for essay?

[D]

Sexual assault.

[A]

Oh, got it.

[D]

Yep. So I'm not happy with that, but, yeah, they gotta do something.

[A]

Yeah, that's like old school Boy Scouts right now.

[B]

I need to know they're not called the boy Scouts anymore. Didn't know that.

[D]

Yep. Yeah, that's pretty new. In the last like five years.

[B]

Okay, I tell you what, in Fargo, there's a Boy Scouts. I think it says Boy Scouts on the outside of the building. They got like an unbelievable building in Fargo. Have you seen that? By the YMCA on 42nd Avenue in the interstate? Jared.

[C]

Yeah, it's off the interstate, right?

[B]

I mean, yeah, they must be slinging popcorn and looking at that building. I don't know if it's HQ or what, but it's so nice.

[A]

I gotta see this.

[B]

Dude, they got like a. A giant lookout there. It's like, it's fancy.

[A]

Really?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Wow. I bet you can only get there by compass. No, you can just put that in the thing.

[C]

I have a Jeep compass, so I get there.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, you got a Jeep.

[B]

He does get there by compass.

[A]

That's pretty cool.

[B]

That's actually a good bit, Jared.

[A]

That is a good bit.

[B]

You get everywhere by compass.

[C]

Don't need a gps.

[A]

Dude, you could do a crazy commercial for Jeep. That'd be crazy great.

[C]

Not a sponsor, by the way.

[A]

Not a sponsor.

[E]

Not yet.

[A]

Well, did. Do you think we did a good job honoring pockets here?

[D]

A little bit?

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[D]

No, I mean, I. I really just want to talk with you guys. I've listened to every episode I'm on. I'm trying to go through the you betcha backlog, trying to hit. Hit up crepe cast where I find interesting people.

[A]

Oh, nice, man. I gotta do more episodes. It sounds like, like.

[D]

Yeah, weren't you gonna turn into something like an old fashioned interview?

[A]

Yes, and I am working on it. I am just busy right now at the bar, so.

[D]

Yeah, no, no, I get you. Hey, I'm about to walk into a bar here after being. After we end the call because it's busy and I was. Holy crap, guys, these Mackinac bars are packed.

[A]

I like how your kids are doing Boy scouts. And you're just cruising the bars. Are you there?

[D]

I'm just cruising. You know, stopping at one every once in a while.

[A]

Now you laugh like a bud dealer, I want to tell you that.

[D]

Oh, buddy, if you saw me, you'd be like, oh, yeah, this dude smokes the pot.

[B]

Gauges, tattoos. Okay.

[D]

No, no, no, no. I'm just happy to do. With a big beard. Yep, yep, Big beard.

[E]

Yeah. Okay.

[D]

Got the glasses, I run around. I have a bong in my car at all Times. That's no joke. That's no joke.

[B]

No, we. We didn't.

[A]

We didn't think that was a joke.

[B]

From what we've learned about you, that seems spot on.

[A]

That's that Boy scouting. You always be prepared.

[B]

They're scouts now. Scouts.

[A]

Well, he was a boy scout.

[D]

I was. Yeah.

[B]

Could have been a Girl Scout. We don't know.

[A]

You never know.

[D]

Thank you.

[A]

Well, listen, hey, everyone has their good days and their bad days.

[D]

Yo.

[A]

And so we talked about a couple of Pockets.

[D]

Bad things and a couple of good things.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, there's. There's always multiple sides.

[D]

Realistically, okay, if he actually. If he behaves the whole time, he'll get out in 12.

[B]

Okay. You think he can behave?

[D]

Yeah. Oh, yeah, definitely. He's. He's. Honestly, he be. Behaves better on probation than when he's just free person.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, that's probably how it should go.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's kind of the point of probation.

[D]

Well, I just rather him not have to do anything to be on probation, you know?

[B]

I mean, but in reality, it sounds like a guy who should just always be on probation, and then he'll be on his best behavior.

[D]

Yeah. We'll say, hey, so is my little brother. He's. He's on probation again. He's finally behaving.

[A]

So

[B]

I just think you guys maybe just need to commit to doy. You know, let's just hear. How about this?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

You call family meeting in 12 years when pockets gets out and you guys go, so, hey, even if we're not on probation, let's just all pretend like we're on probation.

[D]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Y' all gotta. Y' all gotta be here, you know, for the. You know, because these. Dude, these kids are the ones that are kind of hurting from it, you know, I'm. I know the realities, you know, I know. I know life's always unpredictable with them, so. But the kids, just like last week, Jamie, my youngest, was like, yo, where's Pockets? And I was like, well, got some talking to do with you, bud.

[A]

Oh, did.

[B]

Did you have that conversation with him?

[D]

Yes and no. I told him he's gonna be gone for a while, but I didn't tell him. I didn't tell him all the. All the things that I told you guys. Pretty much.

[A]

Probably for the best. For the best.

[D]

He's still never, you know, Pocket still never said anything about it, so.

[A]

Hey, he's working down in Texas.

[D]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

He's doing hard time.

[B]

He's doing hard work.

[A]

Hard work.

[D]

Yep.

[B]

Hard Work time.

[E]

Yep.

[D]

But the older kids, you know, and they're when, when he calls, the, they try to come talk to him and I'm, you know, I, I got so much to deal with with him because I, you know, I kind of would. I'm kind. It's me and my little brother, and we're the only ones that kind of take care of them. And it's a lot. I take care of my grandpa too. So, like, I got, I got a lot going on with all this.

[A]

You sure do, man.

[D]

Yeah, sure. I help take care of my grandpa. I work at a hotel washing dishes. I work at a nursing home and I work down in Menominee, so, yeah, I gotta, I work like 90 hours a week sometimes trying to make sure everything's covered.

[A]

Holy smokes.

[D]

Yep.

[B]

That's why he. Holy smokes.

[A]

That's it right there. Nice one.

[D]

The only way to get through it.

[A]

Good bit that can go in miles. Good bit container, Jared. Well, listen, we're glad that you could take some time to get up to Mackinaw island and be with the family amid all the work and then chit chat with us and you look at

[D]

the UPS delivery person. That was hilarious. Yeah, there was a delivering UPS just a few seconds ago. That's not, that's not normal to see.

[A]

Oh.

[E]

Oh, wow.

[A]

I think, I think the preferred nomenclature is. Well, unless you talk to Joe. He, he prefers that. Joe the mechanic.

[B]

Yeah, he prefers that.

[A]

Well, listen, we hope you have a good time down there and, and tell Pockets we say hi in your next letter.

[D]

I will. He actually does listen to the podcast too. And I, I, I just call him. It's, it's not worth writing. Nothing.

[B]

Dear Pockets.

[D]

Yeah, it's really cool, actually. They gave him a tablet so he can look up, like, just be on Spotify and listen to you guys. So we kind of. That's how we.

[A]

Hey, shout out to Pockets.

[E]

There we go.

[A]

All right, nice. Well, thanks for calling in, man. We appreciate you.

[D]

Thank you guys for putting up on my. Hey, you guys have a good one. Tell your folks they say hi and I'm about to belly up, so.

[A]

Okay. All right. Get after.

[B]

Hey, you tell your family to act like they're on probation now. Okay?

[D]

Yes, Yep, yep. Tell them act like they're on probation.

[A]

Yeah. All right, well, you be good.

[B]

Wow, that was a lot to process.

[A]

That was a lot. You know, and Pockets, if you took the fall for someone, it's not worth it, man. It's not worth it. Yeah, I don't know. That's a tough, tough cookie to crumble there, Miles.

[B]

Yeah, it's. It's actually an interesting concept for show, Charlie.

[A]

It really is.

[B]

Duality of man, man. The good and bad side of pockets.

[A]

You got the good and the bad and the struggles, the.

[B]

The happiness, the sadness, the whole thing.

[A]

Yep. And you know, who are we to judge? We're not a judge now.

[B]

The judge judged.

[A]

I guess so. And the judge found enough evidence to. Yeah.

[C]

Who should be the judges and juries of our society?

[B]

The judges and juries. Put that on your good bit list, Jared.

[A]

All right, Miles, so this was fun, man. Another episode in the tank.

[B]

And yeah, make sure that you touch tips with your best friend just like last episode. Tip your bartender, folks. We'll see you in the next one.

[A]

Bye. Bye.

[E]

Okay, hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye now.

[A]

Toodaloo.