The Most Important Resource in the Galaxy #197

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast Episode #197 – The Most Important Resource in the Galaxy

Hosts: Charlie Berens & Myles “You Betcha Guy”
Date: April 23, 2026
Location: Lions Pub, Minneapolis
Episode Focus: The Scarcity of Wood, Celebrating Birthdays, Garage Upgrades & The Epic “Book of Keith” Jail Diary

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Overview

In this lively and offbeat episode, Charlie and Myles belly up at the Lions Pub in Minneapolis for a one-of-a-kind conversation seamlessly mixing Midwest humor, personal stories, philosophical riffs, and an absurdly compelling dive into a real-life jailhouse diary (“The Book of Keith”). The episode’s core theme, sparked by a casual garage discussion, cleverly morphs into deep (and deeply funny) musings on the universe’s rarest resource: wood. The episode is packed with memorable moments, laughs, and heart.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Minneapolis Skyway & Indoor Nature

Timestamps: 00:00–05:46

• Charlie’s Skyway Review: Charlie shares his first experience traveling via the Minneapolis skyway, complete with food incentives and a lighthearted critique.

  • Wishes there were more indoor trees and a Rainforest Cafe vibe.
  • Proposes adding “rescue birds” and even “toothless, rescued jaguars” for ambiance.
  • Quote (Charlie, 01:44): “I'd like some more indoor trees. I'd like the whole skyway to be like a Rainforest Cafe, but I want real living plants. I want there to be mold issues throughout the whole skyway.”

• Skyway Ratings: Charlie rates the skyway as “7 out of 10” for potential, but “10 out of 10” compared to the only other skyway he’s experienced (a hospital).

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2. Birthdays in Adulthood: Who Cares After 25?

Timestamps: 05:46–14:39

• Charlie's Age and Birthday: Turns 39 soon, contemplating how (or if) to celebrate while on tour.

  • Joking back-and-forth about ages and the often-diminishing importance of birthdays after the mid-20s.
  • Quote (Charlie, 08:28): “It’s not that my birthday matters to me, but...I’m not trying to actively subtract hours from the one day a year that people have to be nice to me.”
  • Considers spending his birthday solo in the California redwoods vs. flying home.

• Myles’ Take: Argues that after your mid-20s, birthdays lose their appeal; if it ends in a zero, it’s worth a party.

  • Suggests that after 25, birthdays should be about personal fulfillment, not parties.
  • Quote (Myles, 14:12): “After 25...your birthday should be about you doing whatever you want.”

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3. Garage Life & The Joy of Shelving

Timestamps: 14:39–22:41

• Myles’ “Birthday” Project: Talks about finally organizing his garage after years, setting up new shelving and a workbench.

  • Finds satisfaction in slow, deliberate “earning” of his ideal garage rather than getting it all at once via sponsorships.

• Charlie’s Workbench Jealousy: Shares his own pride in a sturdy homemade bench, but admits some envy over a friend’s fancier fold-out setup.

• Midwestern DIY Spirit: Both riff on their approaches to tool storage, charger mounts, and creative solutions for hiding cords.

  • Bond over the smell of lumberyards and love for cedar.
  • Quote (Charlie, 22:29): “There’s nothing like the smell of cedar, you know?”

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4. The Most Important Resource in the Galaxy: Wood

Timestamps: 22:41–24:56

• Myles Proposes: Wood > Gold: Launches into a surprisingly profound reflection on the cosmic rarity of wood.

  • Points out that while gold and other metals are abundant across the universe, wood is unique to Earth due to its dependence on life.
  • Quote (Myles, 23:10): “Wood is the scarcest resource in the entire universe that we know about.”
  • Quote (Charlie, 23:52): “We take wood for granted. I got stockpiles of it, dude!”

• Alien Economics: Imagines aliens showing up not for gold, but for Earth’s wood.

  • Suggest a “wood standard” instead of the gold standard for economies.

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5. Philosophy of Woodworking & Craft

Timestamps: 24:56–29:06

• Proper Woodworking: The merits of sanding, measuring, and craftsmanship.
  • Charlie: “You gotta listen to the wood...see what that wood needs.”
  • Both laugh about rushing projects and learning patience—the hard way.

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6. Call-In Segment: The “Book of Keith” Jail Diary

Timestamps: 33:22–53:07

Introduction

• Tyler, the Caller: Updates hosts on “Book of Keith”—a prison diary found in a used car’s trunk.
  • Full of prison tales, love letters to an unfaithful girlfriend, legal drama, blood stains, and a playlist.

The Saga Unfolds

• Keith’s Story:

  • Arrested after fleeing cops; girlfriend “rats” him out but they’re apparently still together.
  • Diary details longing for his girlfriend, days in jail, hustling at spades, and vivid personal memories.
  • Notable Excerpt (Keith’s Diary, 41:21): “I swear to God, if I don’t get one [tablet] soon so I can see if you texted me, I’m going to loose my mind.”

• Diary Highlights:

  • Spelling mistakes throughout (“loose” for “lose”; “tooken” for “taken”).

  • Cooking a Little Caesar’s pizza slice over a campfire—a strangely romantic memory.

  • “Hustler with a conscience”: wins desserts gambling in spades, feels guilty, and gives back.

  • Outlines his fears about re-entering society: “No job, no money, no legal place to stay. No car, no nothing...”

  • Quote (Charlie, on diary): “He’s got so much, so much kindness in his heart, you can tell...A hustler with a conscience.”

• Hosts’ Reflections:

  • Fascinated by the poetic, bittersweet life glimpsed in the diary.
  • Suggests it would make a great docu-series or film.

• Tyler’s Investigation Continues: Lists, old addresses, PINs, and a car bill of sale (!) contained in the diary. Keith even made a music playlist in jail—hosts suggest listeners should build it on Spotify.

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7. Diaries, Brain Dumps, and Legacy

Timestamps: 61:50–68:44

• Journaling as Therapy: Charlie and Myles discuss how journaling is usually a tool for processing lows, rarely highs.

  • Recognize the misleading impression created if someone only read those journals posthumously.
  • Quote (Myles, 67:05): “They’re gonna make two books of my life. If you read the sad book, you’d be like, ‘this is a tragedy’. If you read the happy book, you’d think, ‘wow, this is a fairy tale’.”

• Musings on Thoughts: Touch on how many thoughts are fleeting and untrue, and the importance of recognizing which are truly “yours.”

  • “You aren’t your thoughts; you get to choose which thought to chase and which not.” (Myles, 65:39)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Charlie, on why aliens would want wood (23:52): "Dude, think about it. If aliens show up, they're gonna want all our wood. They're not gonna want our other stuff."
• Charlie, on men’s relationship with birthdays (08:28): "It’s not that my birthday matters to me, but...I’m not trying to actively subtract hours from the one day a year that people have to be nice to me."
• Keith’s Diary, on prison and longing (41:21): "I swear to God, if I don’t get one [tablet] soon so I can see if you texted me, I’m going to loose my mind."
• Myles on journaling (68:03): "When you’re having a great time in life, you're...like, 'I should go write down how this feels.' No—not gonna do it!"

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Important Timestamps

• 00:00 – Skyway adventures, Rainforest Cafe dreams
• 05:46 – Charlie’s birthday contemplation & philosophy of adult birthdays
• 14:39 – Garage organization, workbenches, & DIY pride
• 22:41 – The cosmic scarcity of wood
• 33:22 – Tyler’s call: The Book of Keith saga (jail diary revealed)
• 41:21 – Reading from the jail diary (Keith’s stories and heartbreak)
• 61:50 – The power of journaling, brain dumps, and choosing your narrative

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Tone & Language

• Loose, warm, and ribbing Midwest banter
• Sincere sincerity intertwined with running jokes, self-deprecation, and easy laughs
• Willingness to get philosophical, yet always grounded by practical details and practical jokes

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Summary Takeaway

This episode is a quintessential Bellied Up ride: digressive yet deeply relatable, blending homegrown wisdom, working-man humor, and touching human stories. From the everyday reverence of wood to the poignant vulnerabilities of an ex-con’s diary, Charlie and Myles explore what matters—and what doesn’t—in the grand scheme of things, all while keeping things light, fun, and full of heart.

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Tip your bartender—and remember, wood is priceless.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of the Bellied up podcast. We're bellied up here at the Lions pub here in Minneapolis. Charlie, how you doing?

[B]

Good, Miles. It's fantastic. Pub. I took the skyway here, believe it or not. You ever taken to Minneapolis?

[A]

I walk outside.

[B]

Didn't even. I haven't stepped outside today, Miles, and it's almost 11:30. Isn't that crazy?

[A]

I thought you were a nature guy. I want to get the nice, cool breeze on your face.

[B]

I'm a nature guy, but I had everyone tell me about the skyway.

[A]

You gotta try it.

[B]

I gotta try it out.

[A]

How was the skyway?

[B]

It was nice. Honestly, I could see it being nicer for, like, a really cold, blustery day. And because I'm a bougie bish, I don't even know what temperature it is outside. I didn't even look. Okay, Because I took the skyway. Although I gotta leave before the skyway closes because. Well, I guess I brought a jacket just in case.

[A]

Yeah, you'll be fine. Yeah. Get you a ride.

[B]

I got some food in the skyway. That was the. The incentivizing thing is there was food happen halfway between here and there. My buddy. It was a sandwich shop. I forget the name, but my buddy said, oh, you got to try this sandwich shop. I says, okay, where is. He says, well, you're here. Just take the skyway. And I was like, oh, yeah. I've always heard of this skyway, but never really took it seriously. So I did it.

[A]

All right, so, folks, this is the first ever downtown Minneapolis skyway review. Yeah, Charlie, let's hear it.

[B]

Okay. The part I like the most is when you bring the outside inside. They got this one thing where they got big, like, open sky windows and then trees, you know, I'd like to see more trees.

[A]

I want to feel like indoor trees.

[B]

I'd like some more indoor trees. I'd like the whole skyway to be like a rainforest Cafe, But I want real living plants. I want there to be mold issues throughout the whole skyway.

[A]

Okay. So very humid skyway. I would love to be good in the wintertime.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I mean, it feels like you're in. You know, in Milwaukee, we have the dome, which is like, you know, they basically do these tropical environments in these old, like, glass domes, and they got really interesting birds.

[A]

Like a greenhouse?

[B]

Yeah, it's a greenhouse. Yeah. Why are you laughing at me?

[A]

Why didn't you just say greenhouse? Described what a greenhouse?

[B]

But it's it. It's the actual. It Recreates the climate of these places. So there's an arid desert climate, There's a tropical rainforest. Cl. And sometimes they switch out the climates. And in high school, I was part of the choir team, and we sang a song, and me and my buddy were late because we may have had some pre school ritual going on. And I had. My teacher was so upset because I did not have a bow tie, and I left my bow tie in my locker, and she was pissed. And then I had to run to the bow tie and then run back to the bus. And I was. Oh, no, she was just mad. We were late. And I said my bow tie was in my pocket. And then I had to stand in the back of the baritone. So she didn't realize I didn't have a bow tie. I think she realized. She never brought it up.

[A]

So you did a choir concert at one of these greenhouses?

[B]

Yeah. Well, it's called the domes, though, Miles.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Anyway, what else is going on, Miles?

[A]

So, like, you want the. The skyway.

[B]

Oh, yeah, we were talking about the skyway.

[A]

Rainforest Cafe.

[B]

I want Rainforest Caf.

[A]

You want them to, like, pump in bird noises and stuff, too?

[B]

I want real bird noise. I want real birds flying through that sucker. You know, rescue birds. We don't need to kidnap birds for the skyway. But you get some birds that were, you know.

[A]

Well, I think what you do is just leave the doors open during the summer and then whatever. Birds just make a living in there.

[B]

That's true. If they decide, you know, I'm all about bird choice. Miles.

[A]

I know that about you. Actually. You're pretty well known for bird choice.

[B]

Yep. Some birds, they just want to be outdoor birds. Other birds choose to be an indoor, outdoor experience. But we need a little bird holes there because we can't go just leaving the doors open. Think about. Think about the heating bill, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's going to be exciting.

[A]

We'll do bird holes.

[B]

Bird holes? Yeah.

[A]

So review.

[B]

Review. I'm gonna give it in terms of. I'm gonna. It's got a lot of potential. It's got a lot of. I'm giving a seven out of 10. 10 out of 10 for Skyways. I've been in 10 out of 10, hands down.

[A]

How many Skyways have you been in?

[B]

One. Other one. It was at the hospital when I broke my hand, so I wasn't really in the right mood to rate it, but this was a far superior.

[A]

Okay, so sky, relatively. It's 10 out of 10.

[B]

10 out of 10? Yeah.

[A]

In terms of what you Imagine all skyways are and what they could be. It'.

[B]

It's a 7 out of 10, because we really got to just expand and. Yeah, I want some jaguars walking around, you know, toothless ones. Like, if they got into a fight and they lost their teeth. Rescued jaguars that aren't going to hurt you. But. Yeah, I don't want them on a chain because I don't.

[A]

I just don't know if that type of jaguar exists.

[B]

Probably not. Probably not. It's just hypothetical. If you get a jaguar that just enjoys being there, it'd be cool to be close to a jaguar that would. Or maybe just like a.

[A]

What was the. The hospital skyway? What did you rate that?

[B]

It was pretty subpar, if I'm being. It was just going from the parking garage to the. To the hospital.

[A]

That's the only other skyway you've ever been.

[B]

I'm sure I've been in other skyways, Miles, but nothing's coming to the dome right now in my 38 years of existence.

[A]

Oh, yeah. And Charlie.

[B]

What?

[A]

Happy birthday. It's your birthday.

[B]

It's not my birthday yet. It's not my birthday.

[A]

It's your birthday.

[B]

No, I'm 38. I am 38. 30. Great.

[A]

Oh, wait, so you be 39 this year?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I thought you were 37.

[B]

No, I am 30.

[A]

What year were you born? Let's. Let's. We need to.

[B]

You want to double check my math?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

2000 or 19? 1987.

[A]

Miles, you're from the 1900s.

[B]

I'm from the 1980s. I'm from 18. I'm. Yeah, I'm from the 1980s. So you graduated high in 2005? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

I was in elementary school.

[B]

I was in fifth grade. Oh, yeah. Well, that's really freaking cool, you guys. I don't give a. Okay, so I'm smarter than both of you.

[A]

So happy birthday, Charlie, you're 39 this week.

[B]

30. Fine. Miles, 30. Fine.

[A]

So we got to do something big on the podcast next year for your 40th.

[B]

That's true. We should do something big.

[A]

We could go to Vegas. We go to Vegas.

[B]

Oh, that's not a bad idea.

[A]

Podcast in Vegas for your birthday.

[B]

Dude, I see how much money I lose at the old slots out there. That could be good. You know, Miles, I don't know. I'm not one to celebrate a birthday anymore, you know?

[A]

Well, I feel like I. Yeah, it's like I feel like. And maybe you don't feel this way, but, like, once you hit, like, your mid-20s once you hit your mid-20s, I feel like you just don't need to celebrate your birthday anymore. Honestly, once you hit, like, 22, I feel like you don't need to celebrate your birthday anymore.

[B]

Yeah. Because, well, 25 is kind of a big one. That's quarter of life. You could get that. 30 is kind of like a. It's like.

[A]

All right, yeah, maybe it's everything in between. If it ends in a zero, you can celebrate it.

[B]

Right? That's pretty much it. But 39, it's. You know what I'm doing? I'm doing a show the day before in Sacramento, I think. Hey, you guys want to come celebrate my birthday? See you in Sacramento. I think it's sacramento [e-mail] but then the next day is my birthday, so I have a choice, Miles. Do I either fly home from the west coast, which means I'm already losing. It means I'm losing hours on my birthday. You know, do I want to be a guy who loses hours on his birthday or spends his birthday alone in cabin somewhere?

[A]

But here's the thing.

[B]

What?

[A]

You're 39. It doesn't.

[B]

That's what I was saying.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah.

[B]

I was telling random.

[A]

Why would you be worried about losing hours on your birthday? It doesn't matter. Well, or does it matter to you? I think we're finding out whether or not something matters.

[B]

Well, I don't know. I mean, it's not that my birthday matters to me, but it's not like I'm. I'm trying to actively subtract hours from the one day a year that people have to be nice to me, you know?

[A]

Yeah, but it just doesn't matter, does it?

[B]

I guess it doesn't matter, but it's still like, you know, like you matter.

[A]

Like, does that your birthday just kind of doesn't matter things.

[B]

Yeah, but it's like, does that beer matter?

[A]

I mean, in the grand scheme of the entire universe, no.

[B]

Right. But I'm not just gonna jump out entire universe.

[A]

You and I don't matter either, I suppose.

[B]

Well, then nothing matters. Miles and I got a decision to make. I don't know what I'm gonna do. Should I fly home, or should I just go find a cabin in the woods or go hike something at Yosemite or something?

[A]

Yeah. Have you been to Sacramento before? I've never been.

[B]

I did. I was there for an Elvis impersonator competition back in the day.

[A]

No, you weren't. No, you weren't.

[B]

Yeah, I was.

[A]

What do you mean? You were there for It.

[B]

I was.

[A]

You were impersonating Elvis?

[B]

No, I was interviewing the Elvis's. Okay, haven't I brought this up on this?

[A]

You never brought this up. Let's hear the story of how you ended up in Sacramento interviewing fake Elvis's.

[B]

Me and my buddy Jed. Man, this was a side gig, Chad

[A]

and I just, I, I assumed it was because I don't think interviewing Elvis is at a lookalike competition is a main gig.

[B]

No, I think my buddy John, he had this idea. John had this idea of Elvis impersonator competition. So what you get is it's a convention and all these Elvis impersonators from all different generations of Elvis's life, they get together and these guys not only recreate the voice of Elvis and recreate the style, but they are to the t. To the generation. They also recreate the plastic surgery, the drug use of the era, the infidelity and you literally. And the, the. The dietary ness. So whatever Elvis was doing at that time in his life, these guys recreate that. I don't know if.

[A]

So they're just all like doing coke in the bathroom.

[B]

Yeah. I mean coke and banana sandwiches. You know coke and peanut butter. Banana sammies. With bacon. With bacon. Did he add those on there too? I mean, but these guys really, they take it to the next level. But they do plastic surgery to look like him and they spend.

[A]

It's not even prostat. Like they're like actually getting surgery.

[B]

Yes. And they're spending so much money on the clothing because they're getting like actual. The. Some of them are. Some of them are actually buying like clothes from those designers or if they can find whatever they can get to the closest thing. They're doing it now. Not all of them, of course, but we talked. So I gotta find those interviews. We talked to some of those.

[A]

So why did you do this?

[B]

Why was a little pa. I was a little coffee grabber. I was a little. Set up the camera boy, set up the lights.

[A]

So you and your buddy was.

[B]

I was the hump.

[A]

So what did you. You posted it to the Internet?

[B]

I don't know what he did with it. He was trying to sell it as a show. This was back before the Internet was really you guys like.

[A]

We're shooting a pilot.

[B]

A pilot? Yeah, pilot. Yeah. And I was. Yeah.

[A]

And the show was going to weird conventions and interviewing people or just Elvis based show.

[B]

I think it might have been what would be a better show is going to. Because I don't know how long you can let an Elvis. But think about It. If you did a whole series conventions, that could be good. But also, now that I think about it, Elvis has a big enough fan base that the Elvis impersonator convention could be legit. Like, if you really love Elvis and you love the personalities of these guys, they said some wild stuff, man. I couldn't believe. You never believe the things people say on camera until they're on camera. I mean, this podcast is proof of that. Yeah. Yeah. Charlie, did you feel like you're in a trap and you couldn't walk out? That's impersonator convention. Yeah, I did. I did. And it was just too much, baby. You know? But, you know, I'll say this, guys. I'll say this. Wise men say that only fools run in. Okay? But I just cannot help falling in love. Boop. For those of you just listening, I just tweaked Miles's peck.

[A]

He gave me a little.

[B]

I surprised him. I surprised him with it, actually.

[A]

You groped me. I think you will be hearing from my lawyer.

[B]

Oh, yeah, well, your lawyer is probably my lawyer, so.

[A]

1-855-Nicolette Nicolae.

[B]

Have you had your boob groped by your best buddy at the bar?

[A]

Get over it.

[B]

See, you're the beard. So.

[A]

So are you on. So you. You with the birthday thing, though, you're on board with that? Just like, hey, just. Just hand the ball the ref and go back to the huddle. Just treat your birthday like any other day.

[B]

I suppose, but I'm also in one of the most beautiful parts of the country. Maybe I jet out there and do a couple days of solitude in the redwoods, bro. You know, maybe I just get lost in the woods.

[A]

You know, I. That's maybe the. A good way to describe it. I feel like after 25, because, like, before 25, you want to go with your buddies and celebrate and stuff, but after 25, it should. Your birthday should be about you doing whatever you want.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, and, like, there might be guys out there that, yeah, I want to go to the bar and celebrate my birthday, but I would say most guys, they just want to, like, go do something by themselves.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And especially as, like, having a kid now. Love my kid, but, like, on my birthday, it would be awesome to just be like, just go do whatever I want. Because right now we just do whatever my kid wants to do.

[C]

Right.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah. No, I mean, so, like, if you

[A]

want to go, you know, whisper to the redwoods, you should.

[B]

Right? Because, you know, think about this. The other thing is, like, have you tried Flying these days, it's a frigging nightmare.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And let's say that the flight gets delayed. I don't even make it home. So it's like, you know, you got a bird in the sky or a bird in the bush. Miles. And it's a lot easier to shoot one in the bush. You know what I mean?

[A]

That's just not the right.

[B]

It's also illegal. Okay, Don't. Well, go ground swapping. You might shoot your dog, you idiots.

[A]

So is it technically illegal to shoot a bird on the ground, or is it just.

[B]

It should be. It should be.

[A]

I feel like it should be, too, but.

[B]

Well, I think. I think pheasant is different than. It's not illegal all the time.

[A]

What a privileged spot we are in society to where we're like, we must let the birds.

[B]

Yeah, we might. Oh, fuck. We must let the birds fly before we assassinate the Miles.

[A]

We got to give them a chance.

[B]

Yeah, I really don't know the etiquette on that. I usually don't shoot him on the ground, but I also shouldn't. Don't shoot them, really? Period. Because I miss, like, all the time. But that's okay. I like to go. I like to walk around. It's nice.

[A]

I've shot. What do you think? I feel like you're leaning towards staying in Sacramento for your birthday.

[B]

I mean, I think you should. Yeah. I mean, look, I'm not saying downtown. I would get out there to, you know, I would get out away from, like. That's also like, tech central, you know, so that's. That's kind of. It's kind of like, you know, you want to get out into the woods, you gotta get out of Sacramento, I think. You know, but, yeah, that's also a drive. I'll look into it. The. The short answer is, Miles, I've done zero research on it. What'd you do for your birthday?

[A]

I spent some time in my garage. And we were. I think we were leaving to go on vacation the day after day after that. And so I think I was just, like, helping unpack stuff.

[B]

What'd you do in the garage?

[A]

We went. I went up to brunch with my family, too.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

All right. That's sweet.

[A]

What to do in the garage. I finally cleaned up my garage after moving in four years ago. And so I got shelving up. I got a workbench, finally.

[B]

Oh, my God. It's a whole new world in there.

[A]

It's just great, dude.

[B]

Shit's been on the floor. I thought that was how you designed it.

[A]

Honestly, you'd think so. Now it's all organized me and, you know, once I finally got it to where it's like, now I want to hang out in there, you know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I get home from work, we eat dinner, and then I tell my kid, I'm like, hey, you want to go in the garage?

[B]

He goes, yeah, nice.

[A]

But then we just hanging out in the garage doing stuff. He loves the flashlight.

[B]

Sick. Yeah.

[A]

But now my wife, though. My wife is a little bit like, okay, but, like, I want to be included.

[B]

She can come out, too.

[A]

She can, but she. The first couple times, she was like, you know, doing. Because it's also. She's like, oh, this is nice. Because now I can just, like, clean this up or do this in the house without having to worry about if he's gonna jump off a couch and, you know, break his neck.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And so she. But she was, like, a little bit jealous, you know, And I kind of like that a little bit.

[B]

I like that, too. There's so many cool things you can do. You can also make a little target. I think this is what you should do. You should make a target for him to aim the flashlight at.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Say, how long can you hold it there, buddy? You know, time them. That would be great. What kind of workbench did we. Did you build one? Did you buy one? What we do?

[A]

We had one at the office.

[B]

Oh, nice.

[A]

That I just brought home.

[B]

All right, that's easy.

[A]

And you know what? I like what I'm doing right now, too, you know, like, doing what we do. Charlie. We could probably contact a company that does garage storage. We can say, hey, we're going to do a video. Send us a bunch of this. We'll set it up in the garage. We'll do a video with it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And basically just get a really awesome garage Right comped. Right.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But then you, like, didn't earn it.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah. You want to.

[A]

Right now, I'm currently, like, stuff I already got and stuff slowly building over time. I want to build this garage the way that I want to do it. Not just go and, you know, buy a whole set and then just set it up and it's done.

[B]

Yeah. I agree with you. I. I built this workbench, which I was pretty proud of. I was pretty. It's. It's a. It's a thick bench, like, you can go on anyway. It's not going anywhere.

[A]

Like, if it was in California, earthquake hits don't matter.

[B]

This sucker is supported by Six, four by fours. All right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But then I got a little jealous because I went over to a buddy of mines and he made a cool workbench too.

[A]

And

[B]

folds right into the wall. And I could really use that. That's that extra spot. But at the same time, at the same time, I got too much for it to fold. So, you know, I got to be realistic about it too. But shelving. I haven't done any shelving of substance yet. So that's kind of next on my list.

[A]

You know, I. I wanted to mount my battery chargers for like my drill and stuff on the wall.

[B]

Huh.

[A]

And I could have just drilled it into the wall. And I said, no, I'm gonna make something cool with it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So I had some extra two by sixes laying around the garage.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So I made a little. I screwed the one two by six to the other one. So it made like a wall plate and then a shelf above it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And then I mounted that to the wall.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Then I was online. I found like, flush mount drill thing. Like, so basically like, you know, the battery goes on the bottom of the drill.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They make mounts that are shaped just like that and they click in that are only like, you know, a quarter inch thick.

[B]

Oh. So you can just put them right up.

[A]

Slide on there. It just looks like it's hanging there.

[B]

No shit.

[A]

So I added all that stuff, and I'm just slowly gonna build the garage like that.

[B]

That's cool. You know what? On that whole deal, I just got a little rack from the store and hung it up. And it's just not big enough. And it's. It's awkward with the chargers. So. Send me the blueprints for that.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because that's, that's.

[A]

I even brought the. The charger. The charger mount off the wall a little bit so I could hide the cords behind it.

[B]

That was another thing. I got cords drape and like, it's my television.

[A]

That's why you got to just build it custom so you can think about stuff like that.

[B]

I know Sometimes though, I get like, antsy and I'm like, I just want this thing hung so I can do this project. And then. And then I just like, drill to the wall, you know, and so now I gotta backtrack a little bit.

[A]

That was great. I spent. It was a Saturday. My kid napped for three hours that day. And the three hours I just spent building that shelf.

[B]

Oh, that's great.

[A]

I even ran to Northern tool, picked up the mountain stuff.

[B]

How many times did you go not

[A]

just once, but I did get back, and I was like, I probably should have grabbed some more stuff.

[B]

Do you ever go to a nice lumber yard and just smell certain woods? I like doing that. I used to work for this violin guy in his shop. I always say this, but he would send me out to the lumber yard because he would need.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I would just. Like, there was certain aisles you walk down. Just nothing like the smell of cedar, you know?

[A]

Do you ever, like, just like, scratch a little bit? You know, just.

[B]

Just do a little scratch and line of.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Nice. Wood's good. Wood's good. Nothing like the smell of wood, right, Miles?

[A]

Oh, I want to. You're going to love this. You're kind of. You like. You like something that'll blow your mind if you think about it.

[B]

My mind

[A]

in terms of building materials.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Like, think about gold and different precious metals and rocks and stone and all that. Right, Right. You think about that, and then you throw wood in the mix. Wood is the scarcest resource in the entire universe that we know about.

[B]

No kidding.

[A]

Because we're the only planet with wood that we know of because we're the only one that can support life.

[B]

So, in other words, life is the scarcest resource that is that we know.

[A]

Because if you think we're one planet with life on it, thus we have vegetation, trees, wood.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And from what we've seen, we haven't seen another planet with life on it. They got gold and lithium and all sorts of, you know, all the other elements, all the other resources they have and all these other plants, but they don't have wood, dude. And we act like. We just act like wood. We take wood for granted.

[B]

Yeah, we do. Well, I don't. I got stockpiles of it, dude. I. We should. We should create a bill for the government to make wood. Replace the gold standard with the wood standard.

[A]

Standard.

[B]

And we will be rich.

[A]

Dude, think about. If aliens show up. They're gonna want all our wood. They're not gonna want our other.

[B]

Yeah. They're like, our whole plan. Our whole planet's made of gold.

[A]

We don't have wood where we're at. We would like your wood. We'd like. We'd like all of your hardwoods. Soft woods, all of the woods.

[B]

Erotic wood. Also life, actually. How you get life.

[A]

Yeah, that's true.

[B]

Miles. I think that's really, really interesting. Yeah. Because gold, for whatever it's worth, there's gold everywhere. I guess, universe, you just dig enough,

[A]

you don't need life to produce gold.

[B]

Yeah. It doesn't make any sense.

[A]

Rock, there's so much stone.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, there's rocks for days.

[A]

Just a commodity in the universe. But wood, they don't got it.

[B]

Oh, that's that.

[A]

I like where we're just not thinking about the fact that we got what everyone else don't got, and it's not what we think would.

[B]

Isn't that funny? It's like the more you know, the more you don't, you know?

[A]

That's so true, man.

[B]

I know.

[A]

That's so true, man. So, yeah, I figured you'd like that because you are like a notorious wood guy. You love wood.

[B]

I love good wood.

[A]

And I.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

I appreciate it more and more.

[B]

I like. I like sanding wood properly, you know?

[A]

I hate sanding wood.

[B]

Well, I hated it for a long time too, because I was. In my life generally. I'm a cutting corners guy.

[A]

No, I grew like, you just work on the corners, like of a table or like you only cut the corners

[B]

or you're cutting big circular table guy.

[A]

I hate doing rectangular tables.

[B]

I hate cutting the corners. No, I grew up. It was always drilled into me. Measure twice, cut once. And then when I kind of got out of. Out of my family household, where that was drilled in, I was like, I don't fucking need to measure.

[C]

I'll just.

[A]

You don't even need to measure at all? Not even just once.

[B]

You measure once, but you really learn that you should measure twice after trying it a few times. So. But then I've. I started to realize after I rebelled against the early lessons of life, I came back to them and I found out you can't just start off with the finest sandpaper. That's. Or the. You can't just take some wood and just get the roughest sand. You gotta listen to the wood. You gotta feel the wood. You gotta see what that wood needs. See if it's softwood. Hardwood couldn't handle that coarseness. Or does it just need something a little bit more subtle and how much quacker is on it? So anyways, Miles, I think for my birthday, I might go get some wood. It's great in California.

[A]

I was gonna say how you can get home.

[B]

Well, you talked about you going to the redwoods. That's kind of the same thing. That's true. We were already talking about that. And I don't think I'm.

[A]

Go smell the redwoods on your birthday.

[B]

I've walked through a redwood forest, but I haven't been to the redwoods, although I think a bunch of them burnt

[A]

to the New York islands. This land was made for you and me.

[B]

Mostly billionaires.

[A]

We had such a great segment.

[B]

People know it's true. All right, Miles, what do you think?

[A]

What do you think, callers?

[B]

Let's take some callers. Spring cleaning season is here. Okay, so. All right, so remember when I was in my garage?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, and I was like. I was putting up. It was putting up those little. It's not slat wall, is it?

[A]

Slide wall.

[B]

It's the wall that lets you, like, hang on it, you know? O. It's not pegboard. It's like this.

[A]

Yeah, It's a wall sled. Yeah.

[B]

I forget what they call it. They have some name for it, but then, you know, you got to put up, like, a. A base layer first, you know? Anyway, I had the. I had the old circular saw out there, Miles, and, you know, I was. I was cutting it. I was cutting good. And then my brother came out, and my brother had just flooded the upstairs. Okay. And he said, hey, Char. And I knew the way he said, hey, Char. And I was like, yeah. And like, he had. He had a mistake. I was like, what's wrong? And he goes, we got an issue inside. I was like, shit. And I slipped with the saw and what I was doing, and I just cut a bad cut. But it could have been my finger, is the point. Okay. So what I'm telling you is, had I cut my finger, I would call Nicolet Law because I was on company time, and I could have gotten some workers comp. Yes, I own the company. Yes, he would have been suing me for that, but probably would have just been the insurance company.

[A]

But in another scenario where you aren't your own boss.

[B]

Yeah. Call 1-855-NICKEL-A.

[A]

All right, folks, the sun is starting to shine again in the Midwest.

[B]

Miles, you look like you could drive a NASCAR right now. Actually, you look like you could drive to a NASCAR race with those bad boys.

[A]

Yeah. Driving the truck.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Carrying the nascar. I feel that way. Look at these. I got my shady rays on, and it's warming up in the Midwest. Sun shining. You got to make sure you're going into summer with a nice pair of shades.

[B]

Absolutely. And for sprinter, too. Like, we're about to get some snow, even though it's spring. Crazy. But when you got white on the

[A]

ground, a lot of glare off that snow.

[B]

You need sunglasses more in the winter than the summer, I would say, because you get. You get the sun just reflecting on you. But summer, obviously, what I'm saying Is full year for these sunnies.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

And I got the JFK special over here. I'm waiting for Miles to sing me happy birthday like Marilyn Monroe, you know,

[A]

Happy birthday to you.

[B]

I like him with those Shady Rays. Dude. Yeah, you're one lapper away from Ann. Having issues with us,

[A]

Charlie? You want us? I'm crazy about Shady Rays.

[B]

What's that?

[A]

They have over 300,000 5 star reviews and millions of people switched to Shady Race.

[B]

Dude, that's insane. That's crazy. I mean, we don't even have that many reviews. Not even close.

[A]

And they definitely wouldn't all be five stars. No, no, no. I think this podcast doesn't even have five stars.

[B]

No, I know. My mom gave it one star, that's for sure.

[A]

Yeah. So guys, if you want to switch to some Shady Rays like Charlie and I have, you got to go to Shady Ray's website. Use code bellied up. You get 40 off two or more polarized sunglasses. You heard that, right? 44. 0 bellied up. Get ready for ready for the summer with some nice new shade Shady Ray. Chuck, look what I got in front of me here. Brand new pair of brunt boots.

[B]

I just got them spanking.

[A]

Now.

[B]

Are those, are those oil resistant mounds? Are they slip resistant?

[A]

I believe so.

[B]

Are they?

[A]

They're oil resistant, slip resistant and non marking.

[B]

Damn. Now, Mark, you could play basketball with those suckers in the gym, right? Yeah, yeah, you just could. You see yourself shooting free throws, just wiping off the bottom of those brunch, you know?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. The reason why I got this pair is I. So I got the steel toe, but I also wanted just the soft toe. And that's what these guys are. And I can't wait to break them in.

[B]

Oh, these are soft toe over here.

[A]

But the thing is with brunt boots, you don't really have to break them in. They're already kind of like the. The leather's nice and soft already.

[B]

Yeah, it is soft. Oh.

[A]

So I can kind of just wear them right out of the box and you're like feeling good. Your feet don't hurt at the end of the day because you got to break them in still.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, usually, you know, you're just putting your boots under the mattress with your baseball glove.

[A]

Is that how you break your boots in normally? You don't got to do that anymore.

[B]

Ye just trying to make a joke about baseball glove breaking it in. You ever put baseball glove under a mattress?

[A]

So we've been wearing these brunt boots now for quite Some time. And we love them. Charlie, you love them.

[B]

I do.

[A]

I wear them as much as I can, and I'm excited to beat the hell out of these guys. And that's what they're there for. They're durable, they're comfortable. And I think they look pretty good,

[B]

you know, Miles, mine are looking pretty good and pretty worn down there. And I've got to say, I put them through, you know, purgatory. I won't say hell yet.

[A]

Not full hell, yeah.

[B]

Put them through purgatory. Yeah, but they are. They're pretty new. They're only a month, but, you know, the back feels good. Feels right. You're on your feet.

[A]

That's where we're at in life. We're all about just, you know, it's all about back security at this point.

[B]

Yeah. How do these shoes make my side ass feel? You know, like they do. Am I. Are they inflaming the sciatica issues?

[A]

Yep.

[B]

I don't know about you, but when I was a kid, I used to live lift with my back a lot. My dad would be like, lift with your legs, not your back. You know, And I didn't listen. Sometimes you're quick. And now you need a nice pair of boots.

[A]

So, guys, you got to go to workwear.com, check out all the boots they got. They look cool, they're comfortable, they'll last you. And so use code bellied up. You get 10 bucks off your order, go check it out.

[B]

Tyler. What is cooking, Tyler?

[C]

No, not much. Just sick.

[B]

With what? What do you got? Chlamydia?

[C]

What is it, like a head cold?

[B]

Okay. That's how it starts usually.

[C]

Hopefully it doesn't devolve into chlamydia.

[B]

Well, good for you. So we hope you get better. Are you doing anything to take care of yourself? Are you watching some Netflix? Getting some rest? Are you just working, Getting everyone else sick?

[D]

Mix of the last two.

[B]

Okay, Nice. Good for you.

[C]

Gotta take a dump truck to the dump here in a bit.

[B]

Oh, what are you hauling? Scrap. Scrap?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

All right.

[A]

Hopefully not any scrap wood. That shit's precious.

[B]

Yeah. Do you have scrap wood in there?

[C]

No, it's all rotted out and termite infested. It's already garbage.

[A]

All right, well, yeah, Good burn pile.

[B]

Yeah, would be. I mean, that goes up fast.

[C]

Oh, yeah,

[B]

yeah, just.

[A]

Tyler, what's going on?

[B]

Yeah, sorry.

[C]

All right, so this is the bellied back up for the book of Keith. And boy, does this story get more juicy than I ever thought when I told you boys about.

[A]

Oh, Wait, what is this? Jared? Jared intentionally kept us in the dark about what was going on. What is it?

[C]

This is bellied back up for the book of Keith. I found out more about this story and it gets so much more messed up. Book of Keith.

[B]

Okay, great. To set the table, Tyler called us up about a month, two or three ago, and he had a car that he had purchased or his buddy did it doesn't matter. But the trunk smelt of ass and he popped the trunk and that was kind of like a misnomer of a thing. We don't know what that meant. But there was a journal in the trunk. And in this journal was a man. Keith's prison journal. Tyler then called the number in there, which was Keith's gal lover.

[A]

Lover.

[B]

Who he was writing all these love notes to. And he never knew how to spell lose from what I recall.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

And I don't want to loose you. I didn't want to lose you any. But we said we wanted him to read the journal to us, but he didn't have it. So he's going to get it. Call back in. And so now we are going. This is a new segment of reading from chapter one of Keith's prison Chronicles of Keith Chronicles of Keef.

[C]

So it gets better. So I found out more about this whole story about how he got arrested and everything. And it gets. It gets. It gets kind of crazy. So turns out I have a friend named Keith spelled the exact same way. The only difference is their last name.

[A]

Are there multiple ways to spell Keith?

[C]

There are multiple ways to spell Keith.

[B]

No, there's. No, there's not.

[C]

Dude. Wait.

[B]

Give me one other way to spell Keith.

[C]

I can't spell. Never mind. I take that statement back.

[B]

Damn it, Tyler. How are we supposed to trust what you have to say now?

[C]

I can't spell. I can read.

[B]

Okay, fair enough. Fair enough. All right.

[C]

But my buddy Keith knows book of Keith and was talking to him about it.

[B]

Got.

[C]

Got kind of the scoop on it on how he got arrested.

[A]

Okay, so your buddy Keith knows the real Keith. Yeah, got it.

[C]

Book of Keith knows my buddy Keith.

[B]

Okay, so did they like do all

[A]

Keith's just get together or how did they meet up?

[C]

Secret Keith meeting every Wednesday or something?

[B]

Secret Keith convention? No, they work with them that he date. On what?

[C]

So I. I never asked him how he knew this story either because he lived kind of in that general area.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I would expect that they ran into each other from time to time.

[B]

Yeah. Guy.

[A]

So why did he get arrested?

[C]

So turns out didn't Go to jail. Went to or didn't go to prison? Went to jail. But how? He got arrested. So he got pulled over by the cops, he got out and he fled. Well, his gal stayed behind and she called the Book of Keith, told him. Told him the cops aren't gonna arrest you. Come back. He came back. They cuffed him and booked him and took him away.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

So. So his girlfriend. His girl's a rat?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What was her name again?

[C]

I can't remember the name. We gave us her caller or something.

[B]

We'll just call her the Rat.

[A]

We'll just call it the Rat.

[C]

The Rat works fantastic.

[B]

Wow. But maybe she's not a. Maybe the police just fooled her.

[C]

I don't know. Why did he run him while he was in there? Well, yeah, yeah, several times.

[B]

Why'd he run?

[C]

No idea. I wasn't told that information.

[A]

So why did he actually get arrested? Because he ran or because of something else that he was getting pulled over for, and then they just added the running on top of it.

[C]

I think it's a mix of that plus priors.

[B]

Ah, okay.

[A]

So he's got a rapture.

[C]

Yeah, probably one of those I can't get arrested again or deals.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, because then he'll. Because then he'll lose his girlfriend.

[B]

All right, okay, so. And he only got a year. I mean, it must have been a bunch of petty crimes plus running from the police to only get a year, probably.

[A]

So you said his girlfriend cheated on him a bunch. How did you find that out? And does Keith forgive her? And is. Are they still together?

[C]

Sorry, I was taking a drink, so friend Keith didn't really fill me in on that portion of whether they were together or not. But I'm gonna go off of her word that they still are due to the fact that, you know, I may have called her at 8 o' clock at night, but, you know, it might have been. Might have been. Truth, might not have been. Who knows?

[A]

Well, we'll assume they're still together, that. That Keith's a forgiving guy because he forgave her for ratting him out and cheating on him.

[C]

We'll assume the. The best rather than the worst.

[A]

That's what you usually do with people who've been in jail.

[C]

Yeah, for the most part. Give them. Give them several chances.

[B]

All right, so what's the weird.

[C]

No, I was going through.

[D]

I was looking at.

[C]

I was looking at these stories as I've gone through them.

[B]

His.

[C]

He started out, like, with pencil, went to pen, back to pencil, and then and then the blood just randomly speckled in here just gets more and more. It's soaked through more pages as I've looked through it.

[B]

Huh. That's peculiar.

[A]

I forgot there was blood.

[B]

Yeah, maybe he had a buddy nose. Maybe someone snuck him in.

[C]

Some nose drugs, some little Bogota booger,

[B]

sugar, something like that.

[A]

So that's the. The. Is that the. That's all the news that we know right now. Is that that's how he got arrested and that she cheated on him?

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

All right.

[A]

All right. Well, can we. Can we dive into this journal?

[B]

Yeah, read us a section.

[C]

Let me. Let me find a. Let me find a good section.

[A]

Get us a juicy one.

[C]

All right. July 30th, Wednesday. Same different day. Boring as hell. There's only two people in the unit right now. They moved a ton of people a little bit ago, comma, probably two days ago. I think nobody will answer any calls. I still don't have my tablet. I swear to God, if I don't get one soon so I can see if you texted me. I'm going to loose my mind.

[D]

I'm getting PIDS pissed.

[C]

Jesus.

[D]

I miss you so much.

[C]

I've asked multiple times to see if

[D]

I have a court date and they are still telling me that they do not have me scheduled yet. I often wonder what you're doing, what you're thinking, how you're doing, and it's literally driving me crazy not being able to ask about your day and talk and talking to you.

[C]

End of July 30th.

[A]

Wow. I miss you so much.

[B]

I just love the. The love letter, the unsent love letters, you know?

[A]

Yeah. Was this plan to give it to her when he was out, you think?

[D]

I. I'm guessing so. And it just never happened.

[C]

Yeah, he has.

[D]

What did I do? In two different spots. Just randomly post sideways on pieces of

[B]

paper you ran from the police and a bunch of other. So do.

[A]

Is he.

[B]

I forget. He's out now, right?

[C]

Yeah, he's out. He's out and about.

[A]

He's chilling. So can we get another one in there?

[C]

All right, so get ready for this. Bear with me. My ability to read his ass.

[A]

You and Jared.

[C]

Yeah, Jared. We're team. So. Rat.

[D]

Babe, you don't even know how much I miss you. You don't know how much I appreciate you.

[C]

You mean so much to me. You're my world, my heart, my soul, my best friend. You're the only person I trust at this point. I don't know what you have over me, but you will always have a place in my heart. I've said it before but I honestly don't think I've ever felt this way about a woman before. Question mark. Why do I love you so much? Why am I so drawn to you? I honestly don't know. I love your smile. You laugh especially when you giggle. Thought it's just cute.

[D]

I love the way you handle yourself. I remember the fun times like cooking a single slice of Little Caesar's pizza over a campfire, watching movies and making tick tocks I wish we would have taken oh no that's.

[C]

That's not taken. That's tooken T O O K E N token more pictures of us AKA me let you take more pictures of us there there's truly a lot of

[D]

things I could have done different and that's what I intend to do when I get out of this get out of this time. I want to be the person you want in life. Give you what you deserve. Baby when I get out I really do want to get a dog you you of all people know I love

[C]

and I gotta put the page love days then I do oh dogs that's dogs love dogs than I do people well besides you I really do need to start working out past time you know I'm thinking about getting. Getting an MP3 player and downloading some music but to get one of those it's expensive AF it's it. It's capital A and F. So I

[D]

don't know if I should or not. I honestly don't know what to do. If I get back out on probation, I'll have no job, no money, no no legal place to stay. No car, no nothing. I'm nervous as to get out without any of those and be on probation because at that point I'll be screwed and sent right but in here. B U E T E for probation violation period at the bottom in all caps. I love you so much baby. Three hearts and two smiley faces.

[A]

Holy smokes. God.

[B]

What were they?

[A]

They were cooking a little Caesar slice of pizza over a fire.

[B]

Is that over a campfire? That's so romantic. That's so romantic.

[A]

More romantic than a hot and sweaty pizza? Little Caesar's pizza.

[B]

Pizza. Pizza.

[C]

Pizza. Pizza.

[B]

Yeah, go ahead.

[C]

I got one more. And the ending on this one's kind of sad and if you guys wanna it's a little bit of a little bit of a tear jerk.

[A]

Yeah that's real life. Yeah.

[C]

Start this out. Mama's baby girl Rat love. Where the hell do I start? What do I say Jill is Just the same day repeated over and over until you get it out. Basically, literally the same thing. Wake up, eat breakfast, stay up or go back to sleep. Go eat lunch, then maybe play a game of castle or spades.

[D]

Damn near too much spades. That's the wrong too. It's two in this context. Too much spades is what I like, though.

[C]

What the hell?

[D]

People don't like betting with me on two man spades because I'll bid low and end up throwing off the given amount. Or no, give them bags and Jesus,

[C]

give them bags and set them back. So about 90 of the time I end up winning. I can't tell if he's cheating in space or if he's just got the luck of a gambling man. Anyways, damn. I win. Desserts, milks, nudes. Oh, noodles. Oh, coffee. Jesus all the time.

[D]

And cash in when I want them. What the. My, my, my homie.

[C]

L A B O E S. How the.

[B]

L A B O s. L A

[C]

B O E S. Lebows. Sure. My homie labose keeps coming back and

[D]

I keep telling him he don't want to. No matter what, he keeps doing it. It's too. It's to the point. Low key. Or it's to the point I low key.

[C]

Feel felt bad and stopped taking his dessert. Oh, Carolina got out today, so now

[D]

I ain't got no one to talk with. But guess I'll have to find somebody else. Lol. That's what it says.

[C]

This dude Gunner, I call him goldfish though, because of his stay in the MRT class. MRI class.

[D]

Lets me listen to music on his

[C]

tablet, which is pretty nice. And then he's got three big hearts drawn. And down below those three big hearts, P s. I would draw more stuff, but I don't know how to. But I know how to draw it all, so sorry, but that's all you get. I love you.

[A]

He doesn't know how to draw.

[B]

But he knows how to draw at all.

[A]

He doesn't know how to draw at all. Oh, yeah.

[C]

He doesn't know how to draw at all.

[B]

Okay, I do have a question. I let this go the first time. I thought you had added it, but now I heard it a second time. He said rat twice.

[A]

No, he says her name, but we're keeping her name. We're redacting it. Doing the Epstein files.

[B]

Well, if we were doing the Epstein files, you have just been silent for two minutes.

[C]

Well, been silent or you just would have heard a beep.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. That was. That was a such a Just I think I hear the takeaways.

[C]

That's. That's a. That's wholesome one. That's kind of one of those. Yeah.

[A]

He's got friends.

[C]

He's just. He's a. He's got friends. He's an average man just trying to live his day to day life.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

He's got so much, so much kindness in his heart, you can tell. You know, not taking those, not taking Lowe's dessert. I mean, that, that was really. I mean, you know, Annie's a bit of a hustler, but. A hustler with a conscience. Yeah, I think. I think I like to see that. And this gal is just the. The light at the end of his tunnel. Just keeping him sane, you know?

[C]

Just keeping him sane. And then there's also a. He wrote down a bill of sale in here. He sold a car. I know. He bought a car while in jail.

[B]

What?

[A]

I thought he was worried about not having any money.

[C]

There's a. I kid you not. There's a bill of sale for a 95 GMC Yukon for 200 bucks.

[B]

Are you. Maybe. Oh, here's what I bet it is. I bet he won that playing spades.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What a D to a car playing. It's not racing for pinks. It's gambling for pinks.

[A]

I want you for pinks all out. He's gambling for pink slips. That's kind of fun.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

And then after that bill of sale, it's just kind of radio static till the back where it's got his music playlist that he wanted to Download onto the MP3 player. I currently have a few of them queued up in the truck.

[B]

What was his playlist?

[C]

So it's, it's. It's a list. There's 1, 2, 3, 4. There's a shit ton. I'm not gonna count them all.

[A]

You need to make a Spotify playlist called Keith's Jail playlist and then put all the songs in there. And then our listeners can go listen to Keith's playlist.

[B]

Yeah. And I think you should read. Record yourself reading the entire journal. And then we'll go like, song, I

[C]

feel like some asmr.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I get really close to the mic, like have some faint rain sounds in the background. Read, read some sections while one of the. While the playlist, the music's just slowly, quietly playing in the background.

[A]

I love you. Stuff like that.

[B]

Do you think he gave this journal to her after he got out? It sounds like he wrote this journal with an audience in mind.

[C]

It sounds like he did.

[D]

But honestly, it was just sitting in the trunk. So I don't know if he threw

[C]

it back there and then just forgot to give it to her or what. And like I said, when I called her, asked if she wanted it, and she goes, do whatever you want with it. So I said, okay.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Well, we got consent from her.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yes, exactly.

[B]

Have you talked to Keith yet?

[C]

Which Keith?

[B]

You know, the Keith friend Keith or

[C]

Keith book Keith Bug. No, I have not. I was gonna try and look up if he. I was trying to find his. What he got arrested for through the public works system. And I gotta figure out where he got sent to jail to begin with. I'm trying to figure that out.

[B]

Yeah, you'll figure it out. Yeah, that sounds cool, man. Well, yeah, thank you for the update on this. This is great. At some point, you've read every page of this journal, is that correct?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I think that when I get home, I need to tell. We need to get. I need to get babysitter and I need to do a Keith date with Anne. We need to go campfire somewhere. Go, go, go get one slice of Little Caesar.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

And just say, you know, make tik toks together. And this may not seem like much of a night, but when I'm in jail, this is what I'm gonna write about.

[A]

This is what I'm gonna remember. Still little moments.

[B]

It is the little moments.

[C]

He's got. He's got some little moments written down in here. And some funny moments, some sad parts.

[A]

Is there is a tick tock handle in there. I'd love to get a peep at those tiktoks.

[C]

Love to as well, but there's no tick tock handle. There's a car, There's a credit card pin. Like I said, a bunch of numbers with people's names.

[D]

Apartment.

[B]

Oh, wait.

[D]

I might be able to find out where he is.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[D]

I've got his.

[C]

I've got his old apartment in here, which means I can find the area of where he was at, see if that's where he got. Yeah, see if that's right.

[A]

Another breadcrumb. Yeah, you're slowly pulling the string, you know?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Sherlock and Homes.

[B]

Yeah. And he sounds like a nice guy. He sounds like really nice. Maybe you can help him get a job, you know, I mean, he had a lot of valid concerns in there. No job, no place to live. Maybe you can help them re. Enter society.

[A]

This is a great. I probably said this last time. This is such a great plot for a movie. You find this notebook. You get obsessed with him. You finally meet him, you help him out, you become friends.

[B]

Or TV series too.

[A]

TV series.

[C]

Kind of like one of those hot documentaries. What is it? Some. It's where people, like, find stories and they go find the actual people in real life. And it's like an hour and a half. So, yeah, segment.

[A]

A little mini docu series. Make three, four episodes.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Sometimes, you know, people like, if you write like. Sometimes I write screenplays in like a journal, and I'm like, oh, God, if anyone ever found that, that'd be interesting. Cause you like, you do like sort of character stuff in it. And one time I found something that looks similar. I was like, oh, this guy's got a similar brain as me. And the. I, I think it was stories because the stuff he was talking about was just insane. I found it in this lost and found at this pool I worked at as a kid. And I was just bored, but I was like, this is insane. And I think what I can gather is he's just writing screenplays. You know, I. I've done that before. You know, Lost and founds a great man. If you ever work at a place with a lost and found, there's nothing better than going through that. There was this one lost and found or one time at the pool Austin film where someone had a wedding ring in there, did not come back for it, but there was a little. A little naughty toy in a bag. They came back that next day. So I don't know what that says about American society, but.

[C]

Well, that's, That's. That's

[A]

Charlie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're working at a pool?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What were you working? You were a lifeguard?

[B]

No. Are you kidding me? No, I was. I was the guy who worked. I work maintenance and landscaping and like, cleaning the garbage cans.

[A]

So what the hell are you doing looking through the lost and found?

[B]

Because when you're bored, you go talk.

[D]

You.

[B]

You try to Mac on the 16 year olds when you're. I, I'm. I'm. I'm 13. I am 13. I'm 13 years old. 14 years old. These were older.

[A]

You go Mac on the.

[B]

God. Can we, can we, can. Can I put that. Edit that before I said 16 year olds. I'm 14. I'm trying to hit on these 16 year olds and it's tough to do it because I smell like soda because I kept stealing the, the aluminum cans from the garbage so I could go sell them.

[A]

Ever thought someone smelled like soda?

[B]

You. You stick. You stick. When I walked in, it Was like, I was a sticky guy and I had soda stains all over my pants, but I cleaned up with the price of aluminum at the time, Miles, I can make a lot of extra money. But anyways, yeah, I would just go in there and sometimes she would take a break and I would man the table. She wasn't supposed to do that. But largely, I just enjoyed looking through the lost and found. It's kind of like why I enjoy going to flea markets these days. You know, you can just go back in history. Everything's got a story, you know, it's nice.

[A]

So, no. So you found this journal in the lost and found?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you think it was a guy writing screenplays?

[B]

Yeah, it was. It was.

[A]

You were a guy writing screenplays, and this was in what town?

[B]

This. This would have been in Elm Grove, Wisconsin, at the pool at the public marketing.

[A]

A guy was writing screenplays at the Elm Grove pool?

[B]

I think maybe. I think that's perhaps the case.

[A]

Yeah. And there was some wild shit in there. What was the wildest thing you remember?

[B]

None of it really made sense, honestly. And I can't give you specifics, but I. I hadn't thought about that in a while, but I just thought about it. But it was just like. It was like, you know, there was some, like. It seemed like bad, bad soap opera stuff, you know, like. And then what made me also connect the dots is when I was doing a screenwriting class, you would basically take a character. And I've done this stuff where you take a character and you try to think specifically through that character's lens, and you write stuff as if you're that character. You know, that's what he was doing. I think that's what he was doing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, I mean, I do a bunch of that stuff and. But out of context, it's kind of like, oh, what's going on with this guy? It. And so what. I mean, with this dude, it. Everything seems from the same point of view that he's trying to get. It's like a collection of love letters for this gal. I wonder if he had a bunch of other journals, you know, that detailed other elements of it that had a different audience, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I don't know, just thoughts. But yeah,

[C]

that. Lost stories clearer than mine. I used to work at a pool as well, but I was a lifeguard and I found a scarf in Austin, down there in the middle of summer.

[B]

Okay. Yeah, in the middle of summer.

[A]

That is. That's crazy.

[B]

Where was this pool?

[C]

Just in my hometown, up in Idaho.

[A]

Did you ever have to save anyone?

[C]

No. Ironically enough, every time that I got swapped out because we'd do rotations just because of how hot it was, so none of us would get overheated. Five minutes after we'd rotate, I'd hear the whistle blow and whoever was watching would have to jump in and save someone. Oh, so I always missed it just by a couple.

[B]

That sounds a little suspicious.

[A]

Or they were drowning that whole time and you weren't just paying attention.

[C]

We almost had to kick one family out because they had a. A toddler, like not much older than 2, who. You wanna know how they would teach him to swim?

[A]

Throw them in.

[C]

Yeah, they pulled. What was that movie? The western movie. Great actor. I can't remember his name, but basically just threw their kid in head first. Watch them roll around and float and sink and then come back up.

[A]

Well, I mean, that's like. Actually, that's a thing. Like, it's a way you teach kids how to like. Like it's actually safer than not teaching them anything because if they do that and they come back up to the top and they can float on their back, then they won't drown. At least for a while. At least for a couple minutes.

[C]

Oh, this kid was floating face down.

[B]

Oh, well, you know, first, you know,

[A]

that's a story about life.

[B]

You're just going to figure it out.

[A]

The first story about life, you got to float face down before you can float on your back.

[C]

And that kid also had nine siblings.

[A]

Well, what does that have to do with anything? You're talking shit about Charlie's family is this.

[B]

Yeah, I got 11 siblings, dude.

[C]

Where do you fall in that? 11.

[B]

Second oldest.

[C]

See, you're fine. You're sensible.

[B]

Yeah. True facts. Yep. But yeah, they start sensible.

[A]

He is. He's putting his siblings on the mantle and leaving the room.

[B]

Can we stop bringing that up? Because I forgot, I said, well, here's the thing. How's that ain't different than throwing a kid in a pool, huh?

[A]

How's actually more responsible and throwing a kid who can't swim in the pool.

[B]

Yeah, I was gonna catch them. They weren't actually gonna fall.

[A]

I was just left the room.

[B]

But I was peeking. They were

[C]

like a weirdo.

[A]

Yeah, I forget. You're like. You're like Spider man and you just. Quick reflexes.

[B]

Yeah, I can do it. I can do it. I don't know why I decided to do that. I'm trying to blame it on someone else right now, but I can't remember if it was done to me? I don't think so. I don't know why I thought that. I was young. My brain wasn't fully formed. Miles, there you go. Yeah.

[C]

When they threw their kid in, they would hype it up like an MMA fight. I'm not kidding you. They were screaming.

[D]

They're chanting, go.

[C]

Don't turn. Roll, roll, go.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[C]

A block away from the hero.

[B]

Oh, okay. Well, I mean, I guess that can be a little jarring for the rest of the paying customers of the pool.

[A]

All right, well, we appreciate the update on Keith.

[C]

Oh, yeah, of course. I'll see if I can't find out. Yeah, and I'll just shoot Jared a text so he can tell you guys.

[A]

That'd be sweet. We appreciate it, dude. We appreciate you getting the notebook too.

[C]

Of course. My pleasure.

[B]

All right, watch for deer there.

[C]

Oh, you as well, boys.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Have a good one.

[A]

You keep a journal?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I keep. I keep many a journal.

[A]

Like, actually keep a journal where you're talking about your internal feelings.

[B]

I have some of that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

A lot of times it's first drafts of most of the stuff I write. I just do it on pen and paper, you know?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Do you ever do it?

[A]

I have notebooks.

[B]

Oh, he doesn't want to call it a. He doesn't want to call it a diary. Do you, Miles, do you have a diary, pal?

[A]

No, it's more so like. It's like, kind of my, like, brain dump.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

It's not like I'm. It's not like I'm doing a narrative thing all the time.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Like, writing something out. It's more so, like, I need to do this. Or what if we did this? Or is this piece of content good? You know? You know, then I'll have, like, random. Just math in there.

[B]

Yeah. Drawings. I like to draw arrows. Yeah.

[A]

I draw on the margins a lot, basically. Like, to get all my thoughts out of my head and onto paper, and then I can organize them, you know?

[B]

That's good.

[A]

And I. I actually have, I think, five of them.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

And I have them all dated.

[B]

That's wonderful.

[A]

So it's kind of cool, actually, because you can go back in a business sense for me. Like, there's a lot of business stuff in there.

[B]

Trying to make this very masculine.

[A]

Talking about diaries, I do have entries where I talk about, you know, like, how I'm feeling about my current state of my life.

[B]

Yeah. Feelings.

[A]

And at the end of every single one, I try and, like, do, like, a message for the next notebook, you know?

[B]

Oh, that's cool. A takeaway.

[A]

But yeah. So you can go back in the notebooks and see like what state of mind I was in over the years and how my philosophy and strategy and stuff evolves. And you can be like, oh, yeah, I thought that was a good idea back then. That would turned out to be a really bad idea.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But cool to see it written down.

[B]

Cool to see. I wish I could go back and tend to this.

[A]

I don't have that. I don't have that. I don't have the regret. Good, because without that entry, you don't get the next one right.

[B]

It's all the stop. What you didn't hit, you know.

[A]

Wait. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's a country song lyric or I bet. But you know what, I go back and I read some sometimes and I see the patterns. Some patterns have changed and some patterns are the exact same. I'm like, oh, I'm. This thought I think is new. I've thought a thousand times before. Yeah, you know, like the man's wong minute, that idea. I had that in 2014.

[A]

That's cool.

[B]

Yeah. Isn't that interesting? So a lot of times, but. So going back and reading the old stuff, I find is kind of almost as useful as writing the new stuff. But. But I do a lot of. Sometimes it can probably get in your head too much, but on those brain dumps. Yeah. I do a thing like where you just. You don't even think about what you're thinking. You just write your thoughts, fragments, whatever, and none of it's true. They're just thoughts. And I think that's an interesting thing. If your brain, like, how many thoughts do you think a day that are just not true or accurate, but they come through your mind and where do they come from? And then when you write them on paper, you can see, okay, which thoughts are part of me.

[A]

Sucks that that's not a good idea.

[B]

Which thoughts are part of me and which ones are just, you know, projected onto me from the world, you know?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, like, oh, that thought sucks and isn't real.

[B]

That thoughts. It's not a productive thing. It's not a good thing. That's not who I am. But it's a thought. And for all honest with ourselves, we all have a bunch of terrible thoughts, whatever they are. And but to just almost. The idea is if you put them out there, you release them. But you do have to do that work of saying that's not me, you know?

[A]

Well, yeah, it's. Once you realize that you are, you aren't your thoughts. There's just something going on in your head. Then your whole game changes.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

You get to choose which thought to chase and not.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

So that's choose which thought to give energy to and not.

[B]

Right, right. And that's especially in this. This business is very sort of creative business or whatever. You can. I mean, you know, you know, I can go down a rabbit hole, you know, and. Oh, do I. But, you know, some things are.

[C]

Are.

[B]

You can see what you're seeing is accurate, and then you just also pay attention to your patterns over time.

[A]

And what I think kind of sucks, though.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Is what I realized, those notebooks is I really only spend time in them when things aren't going well. So it's just a collection of. When you're just kind of in low spots.

[B]

100%. I've had that. And I've had.

[A]

It's like, oh, if you just read the notebook, you'd be like, this guy is so mentally unstable.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. No, 100%. And I. I've sort of made myself do it every day for a while. I go on bits and starts with it. So to avoid that, you know, even for yourself, when you're going back reading it. Yeah. Well, you should have happy notebooks and sad notebooks.

[A]

Yeah, I should.

[B]

Yeah. Sad journal. Good journal. Yeah. But it's that habit, I guess, of doing it every time.

[A]

Funny.

[B]

Actually, Miles, in the happy journal, it's

[A]

just basically like, when I die, in my will, I have it that they're gonna make two books of my life. And if you read the sad book, you'd be like, this is a tragedy through the happy book. You're like, wow, this is a fairy tale. Do you know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. Who's gonna read your journals when you go?

[A]

I don't know. Whoever grabs them.

[B]

Yeah, I guess. Why does it matter? You're gone.

[A]

That's kind of an interesting idea. That's actually a really good idea for like a. You know, I mean, like, if you just read people's low points, be like, this person had a terrible life.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe they're.

[A]

They're crazy, whatever. But if you just read their high points, be like, wow, this guy's got the best life ever. He's so happy.

[B]

That's probably a thing, though, when they're like, Picasso, he was so depressed. You know, all these people.

[A]

He only wrote down when he was depressed.

[B]

Right, Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you can't just go off.

[A]

He's a tortured poet because he only wrote when he was tortured, right? Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Van Gogh's like, that only paints what he said.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

He was happy 95 of the time. Those few paintings that got him out of depression. People painted his whole life as that.

[A]

It's true.

[B]

Yeah. It is true. Oh, man. And we're really untangling the. The. The. The.

[A]

Yeah. Like, when you're, like, having a great time in life. You're on. Like, I should go write down how this feels.

[B]

No, no.

[A]

Like, I don't have to write today because I feel good.

[B]

Yeah, I feel great. I'm gonna just sleep in till 10. It. You know,

[A]

that's actually pretty funny.

[B]

That is funny. Yeah, we came across a little bit there, Miles. Well, what do you think? Should we.

[A]

That's it. Is that our episode, Jared? Well, guys, thanks for tuning into another episode of the Bellied up podcast. You got to get down to the Lions Pub if you're in Minneapolis. It's a great spot. And a Y with a Y, L, Y, o, N. We'll see you in the next one, guys. Tip your bartender. Okay. Hope you guys have a good one. Goodbye, now.

[B]

Toodaloo.