Which State Has The Best Beer? #135

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast Episode Summary: "Which State Has The Best Beer? #135"
Release Date: January 16, 2025

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Hosted by You Betcha Guy (Myles) and Emmy-winning comedian Charlie Berens, "Bellied Up" invites listeners to join a lively conversation at a small-town bar, engaging with live callers from the Midwest and beyond. In Episode #135, titled "Which State Has The Best Beer?", the hosts delve into topics ranging from woodworking projects to humorous debates about regional beer preferences.

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1. Introduction and Announcements

[00:00 - 01:19]
Host Miles introduces exciting updates to the show, including a new voicemail line (218-303-5095) and the acceptance of video messages via Instagram. This enhancement aims to make the show more interactive, allowing listeners to share their topics and potentially join the broadcast.
Notable Quote:
Miles: "If you want to call-in and get on the show, follow us on Instagram and watch story for times to call."
[00:00]

2. Opening Banter: Building a Bench

[01:19 - 10:45]
Charlie and Miles engage in casual banter about Charlie's recent woodworking project—a sturdy 8-foot workbench. They humorously discuss the intricacies of building, including the importance of pilot holes and the challenges of maintaining a tidy garage.
Notable Quotes:
Charlie: "What I built is not going anywhere. It's rock solid."
[08:12]
Miles: "Now, some of the pieces may be held together by a ratchet strap, but that sucker is not going anymore."
[04:05]

3. Listener Call #1: John from Michigan on Marital Spats Over T-Shirts

[12:42 - 25:36]
Caller John, hailing from Michigan, presents a humorous marital dilemma: his wife Erica wants to wear themed T-shirts to events like concerts and resorts, while he questions the practicality and uniqueness of such attire. The conversation evolves into a lighthearted debate about the appropriateness of wearing band or resort shirts outside their intended venues.
Notable Quotes:
Erica: "Sometimes I do get mistaken for an employee of that business."
Charlie: "Why is there so many variants in water towers?"
Miles: "How are they supposed to know?"
[13:04 - 21:07]

4. Listener Call #2: Randall from Washington State on North vs. South Dakota

[26:09 - 47:44]
Caller Randall, from Washington State, sparks a comedic rivalry between North Dakota and South Dakota, debating which state boasts better beer, landscapes, and overall appeal. The exchange is filled with playful jabs and exaggerated claims about each state's virtues and shortcomings.
Notable Quotes:
Miles: "South Dakota, I think, is a very beautiful state."
Charlie: "You've heard of a New Orleans funeral? Midwest funeral is the way to go."
Miles: "We are dangerously close to Minnesota lakes country."
[26:25 - 47:44]

5. Listener Call #3: Miguel from Fort Knox on Water Towers

[48:50 - 67:55]
Caller Miguel, a water tower inspector from Fort Knox, shares his expertise on the diverse designs and functionalities of water towers across different states. The discussion covers technical aspects like gravity-fed systems, maintenance practices, and the unique architectural styles of water towers in the Midwest.
Notable Quotes:
Miguel: "The features on them depend on their size and the capacity."
Charlie: "We have a water tower that looks like a corn cob. Rochester, Minnesota."
Miguel: "The easiest answer is gravity. You push the water up and it helps disperse it throughout the town."
[54:09 - 62:16]

6. Humorous Interludes and Final Banter

[68:03 - End]
The episode concludes with the hosts and callers engaging in humorous exchanges about beer brewing, tattoos, and quirky business ideas like "Beard Brew." They wrap up with playful goodbyes and ongoing jokes, reinforcing the show's entertaining and personable atmosphere.

Notable Quotes:
Charlie: "Be a man drinking Milwaukee's best ice."
Miles: "Cheese or die."
Charlie: "Tip your bartender and watch for deer."
[67:50 - 68:03]

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Key Takeaways and Highlights

• Interactive Show Format: The introduction of a voicemail line and video messages enhances listener engagement, allowing for more diverse contributions to the show.

• Humorous Discussions: The episode maintains a lighthearted and comedic tone, with hosts playfully debating various topics and engaging in witty banter.

• Diverse Topics: From woodworking projects to regional beer preferences and water tower functionalities, the podcast covers a wide array of subjects, keeping the content fresh and entertaining.

• Community Connection: By featuring callers from different regions, the show fosters a sense of community and inclusivity, allowing listeners to share their unique perspectives and stories.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

1. [04:05]
   Miles: "Now, some of the pieces may be held together by a ratchet strap, but that sucker is not going anymore."

2. [08:12]
   Charlie: "What I built is not going anywhere. It's rock solid."

3. [13:04]
   John: "Well, this is a less about band, but just theme shirts in general."

4. [26:25]
   Charlie: "You've heard of a New Orleans funeral? Midwest funeral is the way to go."

5. [54:09]
   Miguel: "The features on them depend on their size and the capacity."

6. [67:50]
   Miles: "Cheese or die."

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Episode Conclusion:
In this episode of "Bellied Up," Charlie and Miles successfully blend humor with community interaction, delivering engaging and entertaining discussions that resonate with their Midwest audience and beyond. Whether debating the merits of regional beers or exploring the nuances of water tower designs, the hosts ensure a memorable listening experience filled with laughter and camaraderie.

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Stay connected with Bellied Up by following them on Instagram for updates and opportunities to join the conversation.

Transcript

[Miles]

Guys, we got big news in the Bellied up world. We now have a voicemail line. We know that it can be frustrating to call in and wait for a long time. We hear you. That stinks. So by including the voicemail line, it will allow everyone to get a chance to have their topic heard. We'll listen to the voicemails, then line up calls with the ones that we love. This means the more interesting your topic and the more energy that you bring increases your chances of being featured on the show. So if you want to be on the show, call 218-303-5095. You can call in 24. 7. And again, the number is 218-303-5095. If you forget the number, it's in the description of the podcast, so don't worry. Also, guys, we are accepting video messages for Bellied up. So if you want to show us something or just want to ask a simple question, DM your video to the Bellied up Instagram that's ellied up pod on Instagram or tag us on Twitter slx. Not only do we want to hear your voice, we also want to see your face. Could be a fun thing to do. So send your videos on in ask a question. Show us something cool. We'll maybe have you on the podcast. Cheers. Enjoy the episode.

[Charlie Behrens]

Welcome to another episode of the Cripes Cast. I'm Charlie Barance, and this guy right here is. Now you. Say your name.

[Miles]

This isn't the Crepes Cast.

[Charlie Behrens]

Welcome back to the Bellied up podcast, folks.

[Miles]

I know you did that on purpose.

[Charlie Behrens]

I'm your host, Charlie Behrens, and if you're looking for another podcast to listen to, Cripescast comes out every week. That I remember. Miles, how are we feeling, huh?

[Miles]

You have an asterisk, like on the graphics. Like, new episode every week asterisk. If we remember.

[Charlie Behrens]

I should.

[Miles]

What were you gonna say?

[Charlie Behrens]

I just saying. How you doing?

[Miles]

I'm doing good.

[Charlie Behrens]

How are you doing? Great. Built a bench this week. No big deal. Workbench. Yeah. Cause I'm a real man.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Charlie Behrens]

Huh?

[Miles]

I can say I have not built a workbench before.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I got working man hands, Miles. Look at those. See? Little cut. That was a paper cut from opening a box.

[Miles]

That's why you lost to me in arm wrestling, because you had that cut on your head, dude.

[Charlie Behrens]

Anyways, I lose to you in arm wrestling. You cheated.

[Miles]

Okay, so you built a bench.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I did.

[Miles]

Why?

[Charlie Behrens]

To prove to myself that I'm worthy. That's why.

[Miles]

Is it to prove to yourself or to your dad that you're my dad? Yeah, Thousand percent, basically. That's basically everyone's motivation, is to prove to your dad you're worth a damn.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, you know, I got this garage, okay. And the garage is a mess. All right? So I'm looking around. I'm like, I can't. So instead, clean the garage. I was like, you know what? I should build a bench.

[Miles]

Yeah. Because otherwise you wouldn't have anywhere to put the stuff once you clean the garage.

[Charlie Behrens]

Right. And there's a lot of things I got to build in this garage. Like, I got to build a little stand to hold this shelving. Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, there's a lot of steps between cleaning your garage or between now and cleaning your garage.

[Charlie Behrens]

Right. First and foremost is you need a good working tool bench. Because you need more horizontal surfaces to put things that you're not quite sure where it goes or what to put.

[Miles]

Away of having on the floor. You just put it up in the air a couple of feet.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yep. And that way you can get a better look at it. It can seep into your imagination. So, yeah, I. What I did, Miles. I built an 8 foot long bench with I got 4 by 4 as the basis. So that sucker is rock solid.

[Miles]

Not going anywhere.

[Charlie Behrens]

Not going anywhere.

[Miles]

That would be a. A great name for your woodworking business, Ratchet strap.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I thought you meant not going anywhere.

[Miles]

Yeah. Ratchet strap incorporated. And then you're like, you know, is it solid? And you're like, that's not going anywhere.

[Charlie Behrens]

I like it, dude. I.

[Miles]

Now, some of the pieces may be held together by a ratchet strap, but that sucker is not going anymore.

[Charlie Behrens]

No, it's not. And that's okay, by the way, y'all. If you need a ratchet strap to just make sure to double check your work. That's fine. When.

[Miles]

When Charlie Barons is building a bench. Are you a pilot hole guy?

[Charlie Behrens]

It's funny you should mention that. I was drilling these one by ones on. On. On the lower deal, because I know what a one by one is now. And. And I drilled the first one in. Crack the wood. I was like, yeah, you only drill pilot holes after you crack the wood.

[Miles]

That is true.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

That's smart.

[Charlie Behrens]

I mean, because, you know, you hear.

[Miles]

Your dad in the back of your.

[Charlie Behrens]

I told you. Will you just take your time? Have the patience? I have this old deck that's rotted out, and I was telling my dad that I was going to take it down. You know, he's like, he said, you don't have the patience to do it right. And I was like, damn, that hit right to the. I don't have the patience to do it right. Here's how I was going to do it. I was going to. It's leg bolted into the side of the house. I just got. Undo the leg bolts, put a rope around it and pull. That was my idea.

[Miles]

Yeah. Just.

[Charlie Behrens]

I'm still not convinced. That's not a bad way to do it.

[Miles]

Truck up to it.

[Charlie Behrens]

I was just going to pull because at that point it's top heavy, you know, So I bet you right on top of you. No, I. Long rope, dude. And I'll stand behind a tree to make sure I'm protected.

[Miles]

Okay. You know, I would save that for when I'm there. I'd love to be a part of that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. You want to do that?

[Miles]

I kind of do.

[Charlie Behrens]

You just want to film it? You want to film my film crew? You want to do that? There's good wood on it too. So we take it apart and then we got all this wood to make something else.

[Miles]

And if not, then it's just a nice bonfire we got.

[Charlie Behrens]

Exactly. So that's actually the next thing I'm building though, after my bench is I'm building a wood caddy.

[Miles]

No, I thought you were gonna say a deck.

[Charlie Behrens]

No, the deck. This deck is two stories. So I gotta. I gotta learn. I gotta. You start with a wood bench, then you go with a wood.

[Miles]

Well, first you gotta clean the garage. And to clean the garage you need a wood bench. We need the wood benching and then shelving, all that. You're many steps away.

[Charlie Behrens]

I do. And in this garage I inherited because the. The person I purchase the thing from just didn't want to clean it out. So I got a broken SnowMobile, a broken UTV, a bunch of broken old machinery. So I'm. I have to fix those two projects. Ask me how good I am at fixing light machinery.

[Miles]

About how good you are at taking down a deck.

[Charlie Behrens]

Exactly. Going to find a tree to stem. Yeah. I've rebuilt a carburetor. If you remember from D.O.

[Miles]

Yes. That was your year.

[Charlie Behrens]

That was the last winter. I wouldn't shut up about that. So now the starter is broken on this. This is an old one. It's an old snowmobile.

[Miles]

So how'd the workbench turn out? Did you finish it all or is there still.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's pretty. It's pretty much.

[Miles]

Does it have a top on it?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, it's got a top on it.

[Miles]

Are you gonna stain it or are you just raw dogging?

[Charlie Behrens]

I'm gonna try and figure out how to plane it. And actually the top on, I'm not sure I'm satisfied with it. My buddy just redid his mom's read to my buddy Jay. Mom's redoing her kitchen. She's got this old butcher block thing. So what I'm thinking is I may cut that up into a few pieces and refashion it as the top of this work workbench because it's really nice butcher block situation. And so you know you're gonna have.

[Miles]

To oil that thing up on a regular basis.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, if you want to use it properly as a butcher block, yes. But you know, in my scenario, it's gonna be in the garage. It's past the time of oiling up. Now this is where you kind of drill. Yeah, I'm going to drill vice to it. You know, I'll probably, you know, at this point with a workbench, you can drill holes in it and that's just like. Yeah, that hole had a purpose for this job and now the hole just exists. I like that. Yeah.

[Miles]

So it's almost done.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's almost done. Got a few.

[Miles]

When you started this, you said I built a workbench. Yeah, but you built most of a workbench this week.

[Charlie Behrens]

What I built is not going anywhere. Okay. It's rock solid.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Charlie Behrens]

Rock solid. So, yeah, it's there and you know, it's, it's fun. Miles, I gotta tell you, just get out there and working with your hands. You know, I don't mean to break, but I'm more man than you. Oh, I'm more. And I can beat you in an arm wrestle, by the way. Now that I built that bench, I can beat you in an arm wrestle. Hey, should we take some colors?

[Miles]

Well, I was. One more question for you is now that you are a master craftsman, what advice would you give to guys out there that want to get into building a workbench?

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, well, it's really easy. Just go on YouTube and figure it out. Yeah, no, honestly, I got to work. I got my, my dad actually got me a woodworking book last year for Christmas and so I just cracked it open it see, it's like cooking. They got all the directions right there. Really, it's like Tinker toys.

[Miles]

So you basically built this thing like you would Legos?

[Charlie Behrens]

Kinda, yeah, no, I did some cute things. I will say. Like I, I, I, I didn't just drill the two by fours to the four by fours. I, I cut out little slots in the middle. So I was on table saws. And then I got the chisel in there with all the cuts and I satisfying. And then I sanded it out after getting the chisel in it. And I could feel hair grow in places I didn't know grew hair, Miles, you know, so I'm sitting right now.

[Miles]

So that's it. If you want to get into woodworking, you just got to go.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's it. Fuse saws. I will say you, you want to make sure you buy a nice drill or a drill. I have a drill and chop saw. And after that you can pretty much do. You know, you can do a lot with just those two things. And, and then there. By the way, great place to get tools. Believe it or not, the Goodwill. Okay, Goodwill, they, I. They have to. Now, these aren't good tools, but it's enough to get you off your feet.

[Miles]

They're not good tools, but you will have Goodwill.

[Charlie Behrens]

You will. Yeah. Now, I will also say that for some jobs, you want to make sure you have the right tool. You want to make sure you actually did invest that. And so I would say drill, chop.

[Miles]

Saw, you know, use any wood glue.

[Charlie Behrens]

I did, because I screwed up one cut. So I, I just glued it back together.

[Miles]

Glue and paint make a carpenter what he ain't.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I like that. He said. Anyways, Miles, have you built anything recently?

[Miles]

I built a bench.

[Charlie Behrens]

Did you?

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, my gosh.

[Miles]

I mostly built a bench.

[Charlie Behrens]

Where's the bench? In my.

[Miles]

In my entryway.

[Charlie Behrens]

Really?

[Miles]

I still got to stain it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, well, you don't need.

[Miles]

Me and my dad built that last winter.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's awesome, man. Congratulations.

[Miles]

Thanks.

[Charlie Behrens]

Is it decorative like this chair is decorative? You get in any of those designs?

[Miles]

No, but that's actually a good idea to buy more time before I have to stain it as I plan on putting a design in it with a chisel.

[Charlie Behrens]

Exactly. Exactly. Is this chiseled in? This looks. Yeah. I mean, they knew what they were doing back in the day. You don't see them like this no more.

[Miles]

Only see it in the Amish, by.

[Charlie Behrens]

The way, we should say Major Goolsby's. Here we are in Milwaukee. Big shout out to this amazing facility. I used to come to this bar as a kid with my dad, actually, before the Bucks game or the Marquette game. And, you know, it's just a fantastic drinking establishment. There's a lot of great sports memorabilia here.

[Miles]

There's a motorcycle.

[Charlie Behrens]

There's a whole ass motorcycle in the deal with a guy riding with the cheese Head. So it's right here in Milwaukee and just across where the Admirals play.

[Miles]

I feel like I can feel the history in here.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, you can. And there's an Einstein sitting on a bench over by the door. Yeah, you know, there's a. There's a big pig in there. You can from the World Fair. That they are something. Was it from the World Fair?

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, the fundraiser.

[Charlie Behrens]

Don Nelson Fundraiser for the farming. Yeah. So he got the pig and they would take it round on parade and they put money in the pig, right? Yeah. Now the pig sits right over there. We'll do a picture with it after, Miles.

[Miles]

Yeah, we should.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. So anyways, shout out to Major Goolsby's and, you know, there you have it. Miles, should we. Should we take some callers? What are you doing?

[Miles]

All right, guys, we have John from Michigan on the line and he's got a little bit of a marital spat on his hands.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh.

[Miles]

His wife wants to wear a T shirt to the band that they're going to.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, no.

[Miles]

And he doesn't know if that's too good or not. So, John, why is that such a big deal?

[John]

Well, it's a.

[Miles]

It's a little bit backwards, actually.

[Erica]

I'm the guy who likes to wear the themed apparel and my wife is under.

[Miles]

Oh, gotcha.

[Erica]

No go.

[Charlie Behrens]

That is a no go. What's your wife's name, John?

[Erica]

Her name's Erica.

[Charlie Behrens]

Erica is absolutely correct. What band are you trying to see? What band are you trying to see that? Is it Nickelback?

[Erica]

Oh, gosh. You know, I know about a photograph of that band, but I haven't listened to him anytime recently.

[Charlie Behrens]

As a well played John, I like what you did there. I see.

[Miles]

What is so wrong, Charlie, with wearing the band T shirt to the concert? I mean, that's the place to go.

[Charlie Behrens]

No, that's the place where you buy the t shirt for $120. That's not the place you wear the T shirt. Because everybody's like, okay, dude, we get it. You're a fan. Your presence here is the T shirt. It's like redundant. You know, it's a hat on the hat. It's Gildan the Willyou got me started.

[Erica]

On this, Charlie, because it was you guys sitting at the bar wearing a shirt of the bar that you were drinking at recently.

[Miles]

Wait, Charlie Wilson?

[Charlie Behrens]

That is completely different, John. That is. That is patronaging the bar. I got a free T shirt on that day and I spilled on my other shirt. So that.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah, right.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's why I did it. That's why I did now, sending mixed signals.

[Miles]

Yeah, you got caught in 4K, dude.

[Charlie Behrens]

No, I didn't. These cameras are 2K, first of all. Second of all, John, everybody know, like, what band are you going to see?

[John]

Well, this is.

[Erica]

This is less about band, but just theme shirts in general. You know, if I were going to see a band, you know, I might be going to see, you know, an old 90s punk band or something like that, but.

[Miles]

Blink 182, there you go.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, is it Blink, Wayne? Because you're avoiding telling us the concert.

[Miles]

Are we going to the concert tonight?

[Erica]

No, no. You know, see, like, I like to go to the bar, and I like to support the local brewery, so I would wear a brewery shirt or something like that. Or, you know, if I were going, you know, I've been skiing out west or here in Michigan, and oftentimes I'll wear the. The place of the resort that we're going to. And I will tell you, you know, sometimes I do get mistaken for an employee of that business.

[Miles]

It's like back when I used to wear a uniform in Catholic school, and the uniform was khakis and red polos, and my mom would take me to Target after school and people thought I worked there.

[Erica]

Oh, no.

[Miles]

Well, okay, I'm starting to get it now. I'm starting to see a little bit of your wife. It's not. If it was a couple isolated incidents. Right, Charlie? If it was just a concert.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

If it was just a football game.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Little different. He's buying resort T shirts and sporting them around the resort.

[Charlie Behrens]

He's got a thing. Miles of where. Every place he goes, he has to get that shirt. When you go to Kroger, are you wearing the Kroger shirt, too? Do you just have a wardrobe in the back of your car that no matter where you go, you got a shirt for that?

[Erica]

Well, you're giving me ideas now. That's not half bad. I sometimes wonder what I'm going to wear out that day, but maybe I can just plan it around the trip that I'm taking around town.

[Charlie Behrens]

You should. Have you had anyone pass away recently in your life? Do you get a funeral home shirt?

[Erica]

Oh, man, that's deep. No, thank God.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's about six foot deep.

[Miles]

Yeah, he walks. He walks in the funeral and he's just like, you know, you know, hold on, hold on. I'm doing a bit. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so sorry for your loss. He walks by the funeral director and, like, pulls open his button up shirt. And he winks at him. Hey, you're doing great work. Wasn't that good of a.

[Erica]

Well, this, that's actually not bad because actually one of our close friends is a funeral director. So I probably could score some merch.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, that's. I bet the merch booth at the funerals is just popping off, dude. Like, like, yeah.

[Miles]

Why? You know, we always say, Charlie, when one of us goes, we're going to make a killing off of an Rip Miles or Rip Charlie shirt. Why are we just doing that at funerals? To help cover the cost of funerals.

[Charlie Behrens]

Miles, your funeral is gonna have so much merch, it's gonna be ridic. You're gonna have your funeral at your bunker and it's just gonna be a flash sale.

[Miles]

Yeah, it'll be a garage sale, basically.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

But you know what I mean, it's like, you know, Grandma Kathy goes, I want an rip Grandma Kathy with her face on it. I'd buy that at her funeral. And then all of the proceeds go towards paying for the funeral.

[Charlie Behrens]

Miles, also, I love that idea, but I think you just stumbled on a beautiful, beautiful idea. I think this is genius. Every funeral in the Midwest should be in the guy's garage. And that's where the visitation should be. Roll the casket right in there. And then everybody gets to take something from the garage when they leave. It helps clear out the garage so the family doesn't have to do it.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

And it's. It's a good going away gift. And that incentivizes people to put cool stuff in their garage while they're living.

[Miles]

And then you can bury them in the backyard to save money on a plot.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then you have a barbecue while it's going on.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, this is going to revolutionize the funeral business. Your buddy's going out of business. John, I hate to say it.

[Miles]

Hey, you've heard of a New Orleans funeral? Midwest funeral is the way to go.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Do it in the garage. With a Midwest goodbye.

[Erica]

Hey, with the Midwest goodbye. That funeral is going to take like two days.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, it is. You know what? And instead of laying the guy down, you gotta prop him up with his hand on his knee, you know, so everyone walks in there knowing that we've already started. Whelp. I suppose.

[Miles]

Yeah. You know, that would be. That's actually I wanna. When I die, I want a casket that when they open it, every time they open it I just says, well, I suppose that's good. Like one of those cards that you can get music playing.

[Charlie Behrens]

Ye.

[Miles]

And then just have a closed casket, but encourage people to open it up and take a look.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Single time.

[Charlie Behrens]

And maybe it's a pop up one. And so you have daisies popping up every time. You know, popping up. Daisies. Get it? Little play on words. Pretty cute.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay. I don't think you liked it as enough as much as I liked it. But anyways, John. So anyways, your, your wife is right, but I, I'm starting to think that.

[Miles]

I mean, this is. John, you are a classic Midwest person. How is anyone supposed to know that you went to a concert or you went on a vacation if you don't get a novelty T shirt with that band or that resort on it? How are they supposed to know?

[Erica]

Well, and here, here's where I'm conflicted with, you know, this, this marital spout. Because a couple of years ago, my wife, we planned a trip to go to Disney and she insisted we wear the matching shirts with the year that we attended Disney on them. And I was totally against it as someone who likes to do the place of the, you know, thing you're doing, but except Disney, I think it's a little too cliche. So I caved and I did it. And up to her, she says, ah, that's fine, you gotta do this. But when it comes to other things, you know, concert, you know, stuff like that, she says that the no go. I'm just getting these mixed signals.

[Charlie Behrens]

Is your wife a Disney adult?

[Miles]

I say, do you have kids?

[Erica]

Yeah, I have two boys.

[Miles]

Okay.

[Charlie Behrens]

Did they go to Disney when you went to Disney?

[Erica]

They did.

[Charlie Behrens]

Is your wife a Disney adult?

[Erica]

A recovering addict?

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, no. My God. Do you see your kids showing the same troubling signs of carrying the Disney into adulthood?

[Erica]

We made strides this year. We skipped Disney and we went to Legoland. Universal.

[Charlie Behrens]

You know, you can do it way.

[Miles]

Did you show up to Legoland with a Lego Lego Movie T shirt on or what?

[Erica]

I'm passing on the tradition, actually. My boys both had Lego theme shirts.

[Charlie Behrens]

All right, all right. Well, you know, you can do it. Oh, go ahead.

[Erica]

From the root of this, I don't know if you did the investigation for it, but this all, I guess goes back to a quote from a 1994 movie, like 1995 PCU. It's a college movie, kind of like Animal House. And Jeremy Piven, the actor, says to Jon Favreau, he says, you're gonna wear the shirt that you're going to of the band that you're going to go see. He says, don't be that guy. So I don't know if everybody else has just had this whole thing passed on from generation to generation since that movie, but why is that? Oh, like a misnomer. But you can go to the, you know, packers game and, and your best.

[Miles]

Yeah, I mean, I. Charlie, I. I'm trying to come up with a good reason why you should.

[Charlie Behrens]

Completely different.

[Miles]

Come up with a good reason why you shouldn't do it. And I can't think of anything. What's so wrong with letting them wear a Mars Cheese Castle shirt to the Mars Cheese Castle?

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, that's different too. You can wear a Mars Cheese Castle shirt to the Mars Cheese Castle. It's just something about the band. Something about. It's not cool, Miles. It's not cool. I don't know why as you are.

[Miles]

Sitting here as Charlie Barron's wearing a Charlie Barron's piece of merch.

[Charlie Behrens]

Completely different. I'm trying to sell these manswagment.com and they're not $100.

[Erica]

I got a follow up question about this because I have old T shirts in the closet that I refuse to wear because I feel like, you know, they're in this weird limbo state of being old but not vintage. So, like, how about shirts that have dates on them? How long can you wear them with a certain year printed on them before it gets weird and then when is it acceptable to wear them again? Now, because they're vintage. You ever have like a 1999, you know, tour or family trip, 20, 22 on it?

[Miles]

I think. I think of it. The more recent it is, the weirder it is. If you had like a 2021 band T shirt tour, maybe keep that in the closet for another 10 years and then you can whip it out and it's cool again.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's like a fine wine. You got a fine cheese, you got to let it age.

[Miles]

Yeah, yeah.

[Erica]

You're thinking, plus two years. You gotta let it simmer, but then get it out, you know, a decade later.

[Miles]

Yeah, I think, yeah, if it was last year's shirt, you could probably wear it, you know, but two years just gets weird.

[John]

There you go.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Erica]

All right, so good, good tips.

[Miles]

I have one last question for you. What? What's been the weirdest combo of shirts to event you've wore? Like, what's been the most obscure shirt that you've wore to that facility or event?

[Erica]

Oh, well, I'm going to incriminate myself. But back in high school, you know, a group of us did go to a blink. 182 concert. And while it was mostly dudes in the group, we did have a couple ladies join us, and we made handmade shirts with letters printed on them that spelled out, let's see some titties. Did that.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's classic, guy. That's just creative is what that is. Yeah, Yeah.

[Miles]

A lot of it's resourceful as well.

[Charlie Behrens]

Anyways. Well, good for you, John.

[Miles]

I say, John, don't listen to the haters. Keep wearing those shirts. Keep going to events. It's with said shirts on. And, yeah, you're a true Midwest guy for it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Cheers to you, John. Cheers to you.

[Erica]

Thanks, guys.

[Miles]

Well, thanks. Thanks for calling in today, and have a good one, John.

[Erica]

Well, Merry Christmas, you guys. I'm not sure when you guys will play this next, but we just wanted to say we're thinking about you in holiday season.

[Miles]

You too, John.

[Charlie Behrens]

We're thinking about you too, John. Tell your wife we says hi.

[Erica]

All right, guys. Take care.

[Miles]

Very Midwest dad of him to be going on vacation and. Going on vacation in Scottsdale and coming home with a whole arrangement of shirts about Scottsdale.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. I mean, does he go to, like.

[Miles]

The Holiday Inn and it's like a holiday T shirt?

[Charlie Behrens]

Like, hey, do you guys have any of those employee shirts back there? You just have one in the Washington?

[Miles]

Yeah, I'm in it. So I have to wear polos to work. So if you got a holiday in polo back there, that would be greatly appreciated. Should we take another one?

[Charlie Behrens]

Let's do it.

[Miles]

We have Randall from Washington State on the line, and Randall is wondering which Dakota is better, North Dakota or South Dakota? Randall.

[John]

I'm mostly wondering which. Why South Dakota?

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, shots fired.

[Miles]

All right, this is how it's gonna go. Well, one. Why are you such a South Dakota fan? You live in Washington state.

[John]

Oh, I'm just looking at other places to live across the. Across the country. Been considering South Dakota maybe, but I thought I'd. I'd ask a Dakota professional before I made a decision, because. Thinking the Dakotas, because I like the. I like the taxes and the land.

[Miles]

Yeah.

[John]

You know.

[Miles]

Yeah. South Dakota. Their motto is great faces and great places. And there's a reason why they don't say great smiles in it. Because they're all on meth and none of them have any teeth.

[Charlie Behrens]

You know, Miles, quit mething around. Okay.

[Miles]

Mike Tyson.

[Charlie Behrens]

South Dakota, I think, is a very beautiful state. You got the Black Hills there. You got. You know, the. The. That one rock with all the faces they drilled into it. You know, you got Sioux Falls. You got a lot of pheasants there. What does North Dakota have? You can't just be crapping.

[Miles]

All right, we doing this?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, we're doing this.

[Miles]

All right.

[Charlie Behrens]

What's so great about North Dakota?

[Miles]

Which state is better, North Dakota or South Dakota? You guys go first. Let's.

[Charlie Behrens]

You.

[Miles]

You said the Mount Rushmore. What else?

[Charlie Behrens]

I don't know, dude. I'm not a geographer.

[Miles]

Well, Randall, what about South Dakota?

[John]

I'm in agreement with Charlie. I mean, all those are good points. Black Hills, you know, a little more mountainous and hills just.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's just a little.

[John]

Just a little less flat, I guess, than North Dakota. And I mean, I don't know, at least, you know, you got. Sioux Falls is pretty nice little town. It's a little bit. I mean, you guys. Basically, all North Dakota has, as far as I know, is Fargo. And I mean, how interesting is Fargo, really?

[Miles]

Well, one, Sioux Falls is just a wannabe Fargo. Let's put that out there. So everything Sioux Falls is. They copied from Fargo? 1, 2. Fargo's got a TV show and a movie about it. I don't. I've never watched the HBO series Sioux Falls, so let's just throw that out there. Plus, we have a plethora of interpretive centers. You guys just have.

[Charlie Behrens]

What is centers, what isn't it?

[Miles]

And that would. And by centers, I mean rehab centers for all the people on meth.

[Charlie Behrens]

Wow.

[Miles]

We have the Madora musical. Ever heard of it?

[Charlie Behrens]

No.

[Miles]

It is the Broadway of the Great Plains. Everyone knows that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Wow. Sounds a little plain to me.

[Miles]

We have a capitol building that is on a hill.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay, you guys do have a hill.

[Miles]

And it's a nice capitol building you guys have. I mean, I could go on and on.

[Charlie Behrens]

Then do it.

[Miles]

All right. We are dangerously close to Minnesota lakes country.

[Charlie Behrens]

So you're bet one of your best things is that you're close to another state.

[Miles]

Yeah, it's location, location, location. What are you guys next to Wyoming? You guys are close to Wyoming. A lot going on there.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's good fishing in Wyoming.

[John]

I have a good. I have a question for you, though.

[Miles]

Yeah, let's see you get. Let's see you get to Canada without going through North Dakota.

[John]

Okay. All right. I mean, I guess that's one fair point. But how many people from South Dakota are visiting North Dakota versus the other way around? I mean, like, why. Why would somebody from South Dakota visit North Dakota when you got the Black Hills?

[Miles]

Have you never heard of the Jamestown Buffalo?

[Charlie Behrens]

No.

[Miles]

Well, that's because you're from Wisconsin, Charlie. So. So what about that? People go up and see the buffalo all the time. We have the Continental Divide.

[Charlie Behrens]

Does a continent divide in North Dakota?

[Miles]

Yeah, I think so.

[Charlie Behrens]

Does that not extend into South Dakota? You know, I think South Dakota also has a. I think the Continental Divide literally divides the freaking continent, Miles.

[Miles]

No, because when you're driving on the interstate south, you see a sign that says Continental Divide, and then there's no other signs in South Dakota that say that.

[Charlie Behrens]

You know, if I wasn't so lazy, I would Google it and call you out on some of this stuff, Miles.

[John]

I think Charlie will back me here. South Dakota has the Sturgis motorcycle rally, though. Come on.

[Miles]

Well, we have interpretive centers.

[Charlie Behrens]

What the hell is an interpretive center?

[Miles]

Well, it's different for each person. It's all about how you interpret it. Yeah, it's up to interpretation, so I don't want to put it in a box.

[Charlie Behrens]

Randall, why is it. What?

[Miles]

Well, what else about you? Okay, Sturgis. Not too bad if you want to get some sort of STD or something like that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Not just that. You could get shanked as well.

[Miles]

That's true. If you'd like to scar your kids for life by taking them downtown. Rapid City during Sturgis. And he sees a woman who should not be wearing assless chaps and a thong. Wearing assless chaps and a thong.

[Miguel]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Do that corrupt the youth?

[John]

Well, hey, you got me there.

[Charlie Behrens]

All right, I'll admit that people wear assless chaps and thongs on motorcycles.

[Miles]

Yeah, I've seen it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Really? Wow. Guy or gal? Both.

[Miles]

Both.

[Charlie Behrens]

Nice.

[Miles]

Actually. Actually, that was what you call an interpretive. Assless chaps.

[Charlie Behrens]

You didn't know? You only saw it from the behind. Yeah.

[Miles]

Wow, look at the butt on that one. Yeah, he must work out.

[John]

That's like a game you guys play over there. Is that a guy or a girl?

[Charlie Behrens]

So I got.

[Miles]

What else is there to do with the interpretive side.

[Charlie Behrens]

Randall?

[Miles]

What else South Dakota got. I've been rattling them off.

[Charlie Behrens]

South Dakota's got a lot of good stuff, Miles.

[Miles]

You know, you can't look it up. You can't look it up. Charlie. You got to go off the dome, South Dakota.

[Charlie Behrens]

First of all, South Dakota's got a life size David statue downtown. You got the tour day statues at the Sioux Falls area, and there's a lot of cool statues that they have there. There's a brewery in Sioux Falls, and they have bars and bars and a hotel that I stayed at. There's great pheasant hunting in South Dakota. They got the best pheasant hunting Dakota as well. Well, they got better in South Dakota. No doubt, no doubt. And the, the land, the hills are beautiful in South Dakota, from what I remember driving through. Now, I took a train through Fargo once, but it was dark outside and I don't remember anything that was worth it.

[Miles]

You planned that trip correctly. Going the whole pass through North Dakota was at night.

[Charlie Behrens]

South Dakota better with the lights out.

[Miles]

Well, Randall, what do you think?

[John]

I'm not so sure you convinced me on North Dakota. I mean, the. Really the reason I was thinking the Dakotas in general. I don't know if you guys know much about Washington or the Northwest, but we're kind of known for being impossible to make friends with. Like, we're friendly, but you can't really make friends with us. It's real. It's real difficult. You got to know somebody your entire life, otherwise you're never gonna make it into the community.

[Charlie Behrens]

So you're. You're feeling. Are you from there originally?

[John]

Yeah, I'm from here.

[Charlie Behrens]

And so, yeah. So you want to go to a place where you can find friends at the fill in station?

[John]

I want to go somewhere just where the people are more inviting and not. I don't. Have you been to the West Coast? West coast people were not the most Washington kind.

[Charlie Behrens]

I've been there. I've done some shows. Actually got some shows coming up in Seattle, Tacoma, that area. Folks are wondering. Charliebarrons.com Months coming up in the. Oh, yeah, coming up here.

[John]

But ever come to Portland?

[Charlie Behrens]

Portland? Yeah, I've done Portland. Yep.

[John]

Yeah, I'm closer to Portland.

[Miles]

How was the crowd in Portland, Charlie?

[Charlie Behrens]

Portland. You know, there was. There was a lot of tattoos. From what I recall, someone actually gave.

[Miles]

Me lots of tattoos of trees and birds.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, yeah, the tree.

[John]

I have a tattoo of a bird on my hand.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, that makes sense.

[Miles]

The tattoo artists are making a killing on landscape tattoos out west.

[Charlie Behrens]

They're hot right now. No, when I was doing a show in Portland, there was a fellow there, he gifted me this homemade glass piece that said F the bears on it. It was pretty. And he gave me a criminal amount of marijuana too. I didn't even feel comfortable bringing that on the plane.

[Miles]

Yeah, I was like, okay, I can't bring this on plane, so I guess I'll smoke at all right now.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I couldn't. No, no, no, no. My gosh. They don't mess around with their, their THC levels out there. You got to be careful to circle.

[Miles]

Back to the whole.

[John]

Go ahead.

[Miles]

Oh, I was going to say, the whole North Dakota, South Dakota conversation. I would be open to the idea of a mega Coda. Like, I don't. I. I don't.

[John]

That sounds like a problem solving solar.

[Miles]

You know, I. There was a thing on the intern. Go. Why don't we just combine the two and I know, you know, we are different, but would be nice to get a little extra real estate. Be nice to do a mega coda. What do you think of a mega Coda idea?

[Charlie Behrens]

I like it personally.

[John]

Mind that idea. That's a good idea. Reunite the Dakotas.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. Why does there have to be this north, south divide? When was the Dakota civil War, by the way? I don't remember that happening. And also, why couldn't you get more creative with the name of the state, you know?

[John]

Yeah. What was the. What was the divide over? You guys couldn't figure out who it was?

[Miles]

The Continental Divide. It was Continental Divide.

[Charlie Behrens]

Miles. This is why you gotta stay in school, kids. So you don't turn out like Miles.

[Miles]

Teddy Roosevelt go to North Dakota or South Dakota. It was North Dakota, wasn't it? Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

So that's only because the train went through there. What's true? It's because the train went through there. That's why he went there.

[Miles]

Why do you think they put a train through North Dakota? A lot more going on.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, maybe back in the 1800s there's just more buffalo to poach out there. I suppose it's true.

[John]

Exactly. Well, I have a proposition for both. Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yes.

[John]

I would like to make a statement that there are two. There are two out of the three things that the north that the Midwest is good at. That is. No, they're known for that. Washington State is better at.

[Charlie Behrens]

Washington State.

[Miles]

Say that again.

[John]

There are two out of three things that the Midwest is known for that I think Washington State is better at.

[Miles]

All right, well, let's hear it first.

[John]

I'll give you guys, like I said before, the. The third one I was thinking is friendliness. You guys win on that one. But when it comes to beer and cheese, we win. I'm sorry. We got way better beer than you guys and we got till muk cheese. And it's. I've had. I've had. I've had Wisconsin cheese. And I'm sorry, I don't think it went.

[Miles]

This is.

[Charlie Behrens]

Are you. Are you.

[Miles]

Randall. This is terrible timing. We are currently in the Mars cheese castle right now.

[Charlie Behrens]

Randall, how many.

[Miles]

Oh, no freaking chees. Exact. Does Washington have. Yeah, tell me, how many cheese castles do they have in Washington, Randall?

[Charlie Behrens]

I'M stunned with your ignorance right now, Randall. I couldn't even believe I was hearing the fraking words coming out of your mouth. You freaking hipsters. Take your little goat cheese cow splend or whatever and shove them where the cheese goes.

[Miles]

Comes out, comes out.

[Charlie Behrens]

You get what I'm saying?

[Miles]

Well, it doesn't come out. I get blocked up.

[John]

If it makes you feel any better, my roommate, he's from Kentucky, and he told me that that was fighting words when I was talking to him about it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, so he already. He's from Kentucky, and even he knows that, and that's saying a lot, Charlie.

[Miles]

Some people just like to watch the.

[Charlie Behrens]

World burn, and that's exactly what this guy is.

[Miles]

And also, better beer. Oh, my gosh. What do you.

[John]

Oh, we have the best beer in the country.

[Miles]

No, you hate to break it to a quad. Quadruple Blueberry Scone ipa. Sour is not better. Just because you put a bunch of shit in it to mask that you can't brew a beer doesn't mean it's better than the beer that we got.

[Charlie Behrens]

Be a man drinking Milwaukee's best ice. All right. For God.

[John]

You guys have lagers that taste like sugar water and piss. I mean, we've got flavor in our beer.

[Charlie Behrens]

Flavor. You. You know what?

[Miles]

It. You know, you could brew IPA in Washington with toilet water and you wouldn't know the difference.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, you guys throw enough spices and crap in that you can't tell the. The purest drink, the light beer. Best light beer ever, Charlie.

[Miles]

Let's pretend we are brewers in Washington. Ready? God. You know, it turns out we're not very good at brewing beer. So what do we do? Because we bought all this equipment.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, we're.

[Miles]

Now it turns out that our beer is not very good. What do we do?

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay, okay, okay. So we're gonna go to Whole Foods. Okay. And we're gon. The best.

[Miles]

We can use my rewards card.

[Charlie Behrens]

We'll use your rewards card. We'll just get a bunch of spices and a pumpkin and just drop them all in there. Yes. We'll do watermelons, peaches, apricots.

[Miles]

Do you think we should go with, like, kind of a bland favor or, like, a tart flavor? What should we go with?

[Charlie Behrens]

Let's just go with a very tart sour. We'll call it tart sour. Yes, yes, yes.

[Miles]

If we do all of that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yes.

[Miles]

Then no one will know we suck at brewing beer.

[Charlie Behrens]

Exactly.

[Miles]

They'll get distracted by all the extra flavors.

[Charlie Behrens]

You know what else we'll.

[Miles]

It's like cooking dry chicken and then putting gravy on it so that it's not so bad in your mouth.

[Charlie Behrens]

Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. Also, let's see.

[Miles]

Little nice chicken, A jus. Basically, we're brewing beer that we mask it with a jus.

[Charlie Behrens]

I just like the way you say a jus.

[Miles]

That's French for juice. Oh. What were you saying, though? I couldn't.

[Charlie Behrens]

I want to take a lock from your hair and a lock from my beard and a lock from your grundle, and I want to put them all inside the beer and mix it in there.

[Miles]

Extra flavor.

[Charlie Behrens]

Extra flavor.

[Miles]

We can call it a beard brew.

[Charlie Behrens]

Beard brew. And the other one, we call it.

[Miles]

Grundle ale because all of our clients wear flannels and big beards and have tattoos of trees and birds, and that's what we can put on the label.

[Charlie Behrens]

And they've never picked up a hammer, so we'll make the handle just nice and crisp for their dainty hands.

[Miles]

Yeah, sure.

[Charlie Behrens]

I kind of lost it there at the end.

[Miles]

We'll workshop it.

[Charlie Behrens]

We'll workshop it.

[Miles]

1.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I. It was funnier in my head, but it came out dumb. But anyways.

[Miles]

Oh, and what we'll do is we'll pick a old building and. And put, you know, a bunch of Edison bulbs in it and call it reclaimed. And that can be our brewery.

[Charlie Behrens]

Even though it'll be a new building.

[Miles]

It'll be a new old building.

[Charlie Behrens]

It'll be new, but we'll just put the. We'll do the duct work on the outside of the ceiling, save money.

[Miles]

But then we'll make it a style so that it's looks cool, the shittier the better, and all of this stuff will be there to mask that we can't brew good beer.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, my gosh.

[Miles]

Let's turn the genius front.

[John]

I think you're right on the beer quality, though. You guys are way far off. I mean, yeah, we got the fruity little weird beers. I'm not really.

[Charlie Behrens]

Sorry, I can't hear you over the Mumford and Sons playing in the background. Can you turn it down.

[Miles]

At the start?

[John]

You gotta give us credit, though, because.

[Charlie Behrens]

So for what?

[John]

Beer in America was dying out in the. In the early 70s, and then it was the Northwest that made beer popular again. You want to know why? God, it's true. It's true. It's because we made beer good again. It had flavor for the first time. Time beer almost died out. People, Americans, weren't drinking enough beer anymore.

[Charlie Behrens]

Real Americans were. Americans in Milwaukee were where we have Miller Light.

[Miles]

I don't.

[Charlie Behrens]

Miller High.

[Miles]

Life the Midwest into your fantasy world. All right, buddy.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, we've been keeping it. We've been keeping it a hundred for a long time. You guys are just in a fad. All right, talk to me in five years when you're drinking your THC Seltzers.

[Miles]

Charlie, here we go. We're back. We're back in it. We're back.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay. Back in it. Yeah.

[Miles]

All right.

[Charlie Behrens]

What's that?

[Miles]

We've been making all of these exotic beers.

[Charlie Behrens]

Tell me more.

[Miles]

But the market seems to be somewhat saturated, and it seems like there's a small group of people that want these exotic beers. So what if. What if we took out all of the stuff we put in it and made it really crisp and took out some of the flavor to appeal to more people? And we're calling a soft beer. No, that's not right. What could we call it? It's not heavy, It's.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, it's lighter.

[Miles]

We could do a lighter beer.

[Charlie Behrens]

Call it.

[Miles]

We'll call it Hippie Lights.

[Charlie Behrens]

Hippie Light. Yes.

[Miles]

That's what's gonna happen, Randall. When everyone gets sick of drinking Cinnamon Toast Crunch Smoothie Sours, they're just gonna be back drinking light beer. It's how it's gonna go. It's already started going that way.

[John]

You know, I guess we'll just have to just agree to disagree. I will. My roommate, again, from Kentucky, he said I was wrong on the cheese, but he did agree with me. We have the best beer in the country that he's ever had.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, he's from Kentucky.

[John]

What do you think?

[Charlie Behrens]

You heard me, Randall.

[John]

I did not.

[Charlie Behrens]

I say he's from Kentucky. All right?

[John]

They're drinking the same stuff. They drink Miller Light and Bud Light and Budweiser.

[Charlie Behrens]

I know, but. So their taste buds are a little funny because some of their aunts are also their moms. All right.

[John]

You know.

[Miles]

You gotta look from the bartender, Charlie, she was like, what is he talking about?

[Charlie Behrens]

Talking about Kentucky. All right, listen.

[Miles]

Oh, after you said that, she's like, oh, yeah, I know.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's not all people in Kentucky, okay? That's just the people in Kentucky that think Washington is better beer than Wisconsin.

[John]

All right, okay.

[Miles]

All right.

[John]

You're back. You're just backpedaling now so you don't get a bunch of Kentuckians coming after you.

[Miles]

It. Charlie, don't backpedal.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You know, entire state of Kentucky that way. Say it. Don't backpedal.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, you're right.

[Miles]

Don't let Randall Win.

[Charlie Behrens]

I'm not letting Randall win. I'm just trying to sell tickets in Louisville.

[Miles]

Camp Randall's jumping around all over on you right now.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I like what you did there. Yeah, yeah, Randall. Your name's Randall? We got Camp Randall here. Change your allegiances. Why are you even talking about the Dakotas? Come to Wisconsin. It's a better W state, too.

[John]

I, I, I did think about Wisconsin. A lot of my family was originally from Wisconsin before they moved out here.

[Charlie Behrens]

We'll come back.

[John]

I thought about it, but I don't know. The, the Dakotas, the guy, it's more affordable. Better. Better. More land, cheaper land. I wanna, I wanna raise some cows and stuff.

[Charlie Behrens]

You wanna raise some cows?

[Miguel]

Yeah.

[John]

Want to build a farm?

[Charlie Behrens]

Look at you. You've been on that, that one Instagram algorithm, haven't you?

[John]

Oh, I'm not on the, I'm not on social media. I'm kind of an old, Kind of an old school guy.

[Miles]

How'd you find our podcast then?

[John]

Well, I'm on Spotify.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh.

[Miles]

Oh, yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, thanks for finding. Yeah, thanks for finding.

[Miles]

Well, Randall, we appreciate you calling in, man. This was a good, good, little, friendly, duke it out sex session.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yep.

[Miguel]

Yeah.

[John]

I appreciate you guys having me. Thank you.

[Charlie Behrens]

All right, take care now. Tell your roommate I says I'm sorry.

[John]

All right?

[Charlie Behrens]

We'll do all right. Folks, I didn't mean that. If you're from Kentucky out there and.

[Miles]

You think stance, man, you're thinking of.

[Charlie Behrens]

Seeing me on tour. I was just kidding. I don't think you're in. Bread. Sorry. Let's keep that in. Okay.

[Miles]

I think, I think I made some pretty good points about North Dakota.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, you, you really did it.

[Miles]

What do you think was the nail in the coffin?

[Charlie Behrens]

I think the continental Divide, folks, I gotta tell you. Are you ice fishing this winter? If you are, I've got the cocktail for you. It's a little Tippy Cow. Okay? Best part about Tippy Cow when you're ice fishing is you gotta ice all over the place. So you go out there with your chisel and you get a few ice chunks, you put them in a glass, and then you pour over a little Tippy Cow and, mmm. Here's another pro tip. You get that auger, right? You get one of the handheld augers, so you get control over it. You put it on the ice, you go, you know what you got now? Shavings?

[Miles]

Shaved ice, Shaved ice.

[Charlie Behrens]

So you take that shaved ice in your mitt, you put it in your glass. Now you got a little, little a Little. It's like what you buy at the gas station. The filling station.

[Miles]

Well, I was gonna say it sounds like we're getting Hawaiian shaved ice right there on in the middle of the Midwest.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, yeah, I was thinking like a Slurpee, but a Hawaiian shaped. Same deal, same church, different pew. That's right, folks. That's how you do it. Get that auger out there. Go nice and slow. Slow you go. You get that shaved ice, add some tippy cow and you are cooking with gas.

[Miles]

I love it. And you know want to know something, Charlie?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yes.

[Miles]

Everyone needs a lucky shirt when they're going ice fishing.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, sure do.

[Miles]

What's your lucky shirt? Shirt do?

[Charlie Behrens]

This is my shirt, Miles.

[Miles]

What did it say? Tip of glass, not a cow.

[Charlie Behrens]

It's like kind of like save a horse, ride a cowboy. Tip of glass, not a cow. Less sexual, but still fun.

[Miles]

How many fish you caught wearing that exact shirt?

[Charlie Behrens]

Thousands.

[Miles]

Yeah, I don't think that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Shut up, Miles. Don't question me. Thousand fish.

[Miles]

So guys, you can get those shirts on our website? Oh, you bet you dot com. Tip of glass, not a cow. Good luck ice fishing. And yeah, shaved ice. Great tip.

[Charlie Behrens]

Thank you, Miles.

[Miles]

That was a great tip.

[Charlie Behrens]

I don't get complimented often on this show, so I'm gonna put that right in the pocket.

[Miles]

Right in the pocket, Charlie. I thought I was gonna have to call Nicolay at some point on the drive here today.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh no, what'd you do, Miles?

[Miles]

Miles, I was riding with you, Miles.

[Charlie Behrens]

Why are we bringing that back up?

[Miles]

I thought that maybe we were gonna catch some black guys go spinning into the oblivion and I was gonna get injured, but I didn't.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, because it's over.

[Miles]

Freezing would have.

[Charlie Behrens]

Black ice is like a 15 degree thing, Miles. But as we were driving, Flash freeze. What the hell is wrong?

[Miles]

As I was driving, I had my phone down by my side and I had the number 1855 Nicolette queued and ready to go. So as soon as we went spinning, I would be ready. But didn't happen. Thank God. But guys, if you end up driving with Charlie and you do end up in an accident and end up getting hurt, Gotta give Nicolay Law call Miles.

[Charlie Behrens]

Why don't you get that number dialed back up before I beat you with this microphone Call Nick Clay.

[Miles]

Fear the beard. There's no way I can lose that one.

[Charlie Behrens]

I I, it's premeditated.

[Miles]

Yeah, it is.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I've been meditated on that all podcast.

[Miles]

So guys, go to nicolelaw.com and they're gonna help you Out. Hi, is this Miguel?

[Charlie Behrens]

Hey, Miles.

[Miguel]

How's it going?

[Miles]

Doing good. I got Charlie here with me too.

[Charlie Behrens]

Miguel, how are you doing? I'm doing good, man. What's cooking?

[Miguel]

Oh, nothing, Mac. Just got nothing much. Just got back from driving around all day, riding around. Good for you to head up to Fort Knox.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I hear it's beautiful this time of year. Good for you.

[Miguel]

Pretty decent.

[Charlie Behrens]

So you got something you want to say about water towers is what I hear.

[Miguel]

Well, yeah, I heard that y'all are more interested in one of your episodes and you had all these questions, and I used to, up until this year, the water tower inspection throughout college, and so I might be able to answer some of yalls questions.

[Charlie Behrens]

That's awesome. We got a water tower expert right here on the Bellied up podcast. I. I've always loved water towers. I've always been fascinated by them, you know.

[Miguel]

Well, that's one of the parts of it we had to make sure they are beautiful. So whenever you're over there just staring at them, you're not staring at an ugly blob of white up in the sky.

[Miles]

Okay, Yeah, I got questions for you. I got them lined up. The Midwest is water tower town central. I mean, we got water tower towns everywhere, but you'd think at some point we would standardize the water tower. But when you drive through Minnesota, Wisconsin, every. It's almost like a snowflake. I feel like every single water tower is just a little bit different than the others. So I got a question. Why are some water towers the wine glass shape with the one stem and the bulb at the top. Why does some have four legs? Why does some have eight legs? Why do some have no legs? The Lieutenant Dan special. Why is there so many variants in water towers?

[Miguel]

Well, for one of the. The features on them, it depends on their size and the capacity. The easy answer for like the four leg and the eight leg is, are you dealing with a million gallon, 2 million gallons, 500 gallon? It's just kind of the weight distribution and where it's at that now for like the ones that look like lollipops, that's just different manufacturers and depends on who is building it and refurbishing them and doing work on them? Because it's. It's an open market. So you're not just. If you do water towers, you're not in one spot. The contractors I work with, a lot of them were based out of Kentucky, but their employees were from Texas, North Carolina, and they travel all over the country to do them. They Go up for bid and they sit there and send out whoever's the most qualified or cheapest bid. And it depends on which water tower they can build with their specifications.

[Erica]

Wow.

[Charlie Behrens]

That was a. That was a detail. That was the whole book.

[Miles]

I would feel like I would expect nothing less from an inspector.

[Charlie Behrens]

What is your favorite water tower? And let me start by giving mine. Rochester, Minnesota. There's a water tower that looks like a corn cob. Cob.

[Miles]

Oh, really?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

I haven't seen it.

[Charlie Behrens]

They painted it to look like corn cob. I think it's Rochester. It might be Mankato. I think it's Rochester, though.

[Miguel]

I just brought it up on one of the podcasts. I actually had to look it up when he brought it up. And it was a really cool looking Watertown, we'll give you that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, I brought that up before.

[John]

Yeah.

[Miles]

You'll have to excuse us, Miguel. We've done a lot of hours of.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miguel]

A lot of my pastime while I'm driving. And that's one of the reasons started listening was when I was driving from tower to tower, I would spend hours on the road. And so I started listening to you guys.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, thank you for letting us keep you company on the road. Now, what is the purpose for people who don't know anything about water towers? Why put water in a tower? It seems like a lot of work to get it up there. Or does it just open up every time it rains and just collect?

[Miles]

It's got. It's kind of like Mercedes Benz stadium where the top kind of. Of.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Folds open. That looks like a butthole.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miguel]

Well, so the biggest. The easiest answer to that is gravity is that you push the water up and then it helps disperse it throughout the town. The higher up it is, the just gravity spreads it out. So if you have a closer house to a water tower, you're going to have higher water pressure.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh.

[Miles]

So if you got a Sky one taller building than the water tower in town, do you have to have a Lt. Dan on top?

[Miguel]

No, I should. It should even out. Those things are pushing out a lot of pressure. And then it's actually funny you mentioned that they don't open up from the top. They fill up from the bottom. They have an inlet and outlet pipe and it'll bring the water up through there and it's. It stores it. And that way it can be pushed out throughout the town. And most of the times they're not under half a tank. They're constantly being filled and pushed out throughout the day.

[Charlie Behrens]

So do the. Is it hard getting the water up the tower or is that just the physics of water and water rises Just.

[Miguel]

Your average pump station.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay, so there's a mechanical pump getting it up there.

[John]

Yep.

[Miguel]

And they also do have storage tanks and water towers or I guess water tanks into the ground and on the just regular surface level. You just don't really see them as often.

[Charlie Behrens]

Now inside the water tower, can you go swimming thing if you'd like.

[Miguel]

Well, that's, that's actually how we used to do the interior inspections. Would haul up all the scuba gear and go swimming in there.

[Charlie Behrens]

Really?

[Miles]

That doesn't make me feel good about our water supply. That was going to be next question is how do you clean this sucker?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. Are you peeing in your scuba suit inside the water tower? Because everyone's peeing in their wetsuit.

[Miguel]

That was a little bit before my time. My, my boss luckily had a. A drone called the ROV that I just pull up there. And let me tell you what, hauling that some bitch 200ft in the air with just a rope is not the best workout on the arms.

[Miles]

Why don't you just leave it on the ground and fly it up there?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miguel]

It's not one of these new drones that are flying around the country can only go in the water. It can't fly go in water at the same time.

[Charlie Behrens]

Wait, the drone they have in water drones. That's called a submarine, first of all.

[Miguel]

Basically it's a little summary that we have a tether and remote control. It.

[Miles]

I don't know why I thought he meant a real drone. Like.

[Miguel]

Like a dji.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, that's what I thought too, actually. First you said.

[Miguel]

Actually Charlie, I should bring this up to you. I'm pretty sure it was Wisconsin that was having one of the water towers worked on and it was the gentleman cleaning the inside. For some reason they decided not to drain it like they normally do. And it was a guy from Texas who thought it would be okay to scuba dive in there and clean it and didn't take into account the weather difference and ended up getting hypothermia and dying inside of the tower.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, no way. There's a dead guy in one of the towers. Well, rest in peace.

[Miles]

But also, that's our drinking water, Charlie.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh. So do they have to get rid.

[Miguel]

Of the water vitamins?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah. So yeah. Does this water get purified or is the.

[Miguel]

Yeah, trust me. There's like 15 million filters they have to go through before it even touches your faucet.

[Charlie Behrens]

So feel better with the dead guy in the water tower. They didn't even do anything special. It's just they got him out of there.

[Miguel]

And I'm pretty sure it has to be a full tank decontamination. At least that's what wood requires. Them drain it and decontaminate it and go through the whole process. But then again, each state and city has a different inspector.

[Charlie Behrens]

You said there's all these filters in the water. These filters pulling out the microplastics. We have so much microplastics in our water.

[Miguel]

Seen that one coming. Yeah, I'm not sure. I'm not really a water biologist. I just make sure the water towers are staying tip top shape. And I recommend engineers in the cities and make sure the contractors do the work properly.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, just so people know, there's so many microplastics in our water that we got in our brains and our balls. Miles, you got microplastic.

[Miles]

You are worried about this as you are drinking beer and drinking liquor at a bar? Yeah, I mean, that's gonna be the way.

[Charlie Behrens]

Hey, Miles, beer does something to my brain. Okay. Water. Like I didn't ask for the microplastics. If the microplastics made me feel a little loopy, then fine, that's my choice, but I didn't ask for that.

[Miles]

Micro dosing microplastics for a good high.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I mean, if that got you high, then that's a different story. You're choosing to do that. But no one's choosing to put all these microplastics in our balls.

[Miles]

You know, I got a question about the cleaning process. Is it similar to like pools in the sense you just have like a pool boy that comes over, kind of shirtless, kind of rock hard, abs maybe oiled up a little bit, and he's got these skippy shorts on.

[Charlie Behrens]

Are you sure you're in a happy marriage?

[Miguel]

Miles sounds like he's not. To be honest, he might be a little bit more Beverly Hills pool boy life.

[Miles]

Yeah, I'm just wondering if. If it's the same type of process or not.

[Miguel]

I mean, it depends. Or fat Mexican, your type.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, God, now he can say that his name's Miguel. Okay, let me remind everybody. Let me remind everyone.

[Miles]

No, it's like they have that pool boy type situation. They're like. I don't know. All the middle aged women in town gather around the water tower every first Wednesday of the month. It's just weird.

[Charlie Behrens]

They got the Knox.

[Miguel]

They dress up more covered and clothing than anything else. They are from the head to toe, covered in different long Sleeves, gloves. Because a lot of times they're working with abrasive materials so they can't show off their glistening bodies to the local women.

[Miles]

It's really.

[Miguel]

They have to hide it, unfortunately.

[Miles]

It's really a shame to cover all that up.

[Charlie Behrens]

Good.

[Miguel]

It. But the fun industry to work in, got to work with a lot of different people and gotta climb a lot of different towers and.

[Miles]

Yeah, see, that's where I'm out. I. I can't do heights. If I had to climb on top of water tower, I. I think I'm more of a Lt. Dan type of water tower guy. If I had to inspect it.

[Miguel]

I'm.

[Miles]

A flat land guy. Keep me as close to land as possible.

[Charlie Behrens]

I didn't realize you had such a fear of heights.

[Miles]

It's not the fear of heights. It's the fear of falling. Falling.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, okay.

[Miguel]

Oh, you have a harness on.

[Charlie Behrens]

You got a harness on.

[Miles]

I don't matter.

[Miguel]

You. You clip that on, they'll prevent you from falling.

[Miles]

No matter.

[Miguel]

If it makes you feel any better.

[Miles]

Your hands are starting to get sweaty just thinking about climbing on top of a water tower. Can't do it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Let me feel. Oh, yeah.

[Miles]

I told you.

[Charlie Behrens]

He's perspiring over here.

[Miguel]

Perspiring?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, I sweat.

[Miguel]

Perspiring. Rating.

[Charlie Behrens]

Shut, Miguel. Shut up, dude.

[Miles]

See, I just.

[Miguel]

My second language, and I'm. I like it when I can correct.

[Miles]

You know, just when I.

[Miguel]

Doesn't happen often.

[Miles]

Just when I was turning a corner on inspectors. You gotta say something like that.

[Charlie Behrens]

You're a jackass, Miguel.

[Miles]

When I was working concrete, the inspectors would come with their pocket protectors and just start pointing out and all that. And I was starting to turn a corner, thinking, hey, maybe all inspectors aren't narc nerds. And then, Miguel, you said something like.

[Miguel]

That, but that wasn't to you, Miles. That's for Charlie.

[Miles]

I know. Well, it is refreshing to see someone call Charlie on his once in a while.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh, kid, you do it all day. Miles.

[Miles]

Someone else calling his.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, Miguel, listen, we.

[Miles]

So what do you do now?

[Miguel]

Apparently, I don't do anything. I'm trying to get on active duty orders with the Navy, and it's just a pain in the ass.

[Charlie Behrens]

Well, judging by the state of the world politics, I feel like you're gonna be getting out of here in no time.

[Miguel]

Well, I don't know. We'll see about that. I can't really say much on it. If I knew anything, I'd say it, but I don't know anything. Too little.

[Miles]

Sounds like someone would Say, who knew something?

[Charlie Behrens]

Who's got the best navy in the world? Miguel? Is it us or did China beat us?

[Miguel]

I think we do.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay. Okay.

[Miguel]

But I can't really speak much. I haven't been in the navy for too much long. I did the Marine Corps for six years. Previously branches.

[Charlie Behrens]

Wow, you're a badass dude.

[Miles]

You went in the. You went in the transfer portal. I did too much nil money at the other place.

[Charlie Behrens]

You got something you want? Buy, seller, trade?

[Miguel]

I know you. I know you like. Yeah, actually, I do. I got a buy, sell, trade, trade.

[Charlie Behrens]

What's that?

[Miguel]

I got a piece of land out here in central Kentucky right off a beautiful golf course. The miles, if you want to, you know, build a little escape home. It's about half an acre right off hole 11, and I'm trying to get rid of it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Wow. Is it a nice golf course?

[Miguel]

It is a nice golf course.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay.

[Miguel]

I don't really play golf, but a lot of people seem to enjoy it. And one of the nicer ones around, around.

[Charlie Behrens]

What do you want for it?

[Miguel]

We're asking 45 for it.

[Charlie Behrens]

45,000?

[Miguel]

Yeah.

[Charlie Behrens]

Geez.

[Miles]

Yeah, I got a half acre now. It cost me more than that.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, well, listen, Miles, why don't you buy.

[Miguel]

It's an investment.

[Miles]

It could the tax write off.

[Miguel]

It's the end of the season.

[Miles]

Is there any direct flights from Fargo to Louisville?

[Miguel]

To Louisville, most likely, but Lexington's probably a little bit closer to me.

[Charlie Behrens]

Oh. Oh, got it. Well, it's not that far of a drive, Miles. You just get through. You. You start heading south, you get through like six, seven episodes of the Bellied up podcast.

[Miguel]

Yeah, exactly.

[Miles]

I'll have to talk to your ball and chain, see what she says.

[Charlie Behrens]

All right, all right, all right, all right. Well, Miguel was so nice talking to you and thank you for your service.

[Miguel]

I appreciate that. I've been a long time listener.

[Charlie Behrens]

Okay, well, we do appreciate you. And watch for deer out there. There.

[Miles]

All right.

[Miguel]

You all do the same. Have a good night.

[Charlie Behrens]

All right, we'll see you now. That was really cool. I learned so much about water towers.

[Miles]

Yeah. Next time you.

[Charlie Behrens]

You.

[Miles]

You drive a lot for the old fashioned tour.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

Take a peep at the different water towers.

[Charlie Behrens]

You see, I've been peeping water towers.

[Miles]

Remember back in the day when they did the the States on the back of the quarters?

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah.

[Miles]

And then you get the booklet and collect all of the quarters from different states. They should start doing that for water to towers.

[Charlie Behrens]

Every water tower should have a little penny machine. Where you put a penny in and you get a. A water tower penny back.

[Miles]

That's good. Like the ones where you crank it and it flattens it out and puts a design on it.

[Charlie Behrens]

Yeah, we should.

[Miles]

We.

[Charlie Behrens]

Let's start.

[Miles]

That could be a good business for us.

[Charlie Behrens]

Thank you very much. Oh, that's. We just got some. Eat cheese. Oh, okay, fine. This is packers colors. That's what's up.

[Miles]

Eat cheese or die.

[Charlie Behrens]

Eat cheese or die.

[Miles]

All right. Was that it, Charlie?

[Charlie Behrens]

That's it, Miles. It's another episode of the Bellied up podcast. It's been so wonderful sitting here with you, my friend, even though you gave me a bunch of crap today, which is unfortunate. I'm gonna put this bracelet on. Look at this, Miles. We're like friendship bracelets. Eat cheese or die.

[Miles]

Cheese or die. Well, that's it, folks. Here at the Mars Cheese Factory.

[Charlie Behrens]

Mars Cheese Castle. God, Miles, we went through a whole episode here. You get the name, right?

[Miles]

Sorry. I was so enamored by the Eat cheese or die bracelet. It's kind of like a wwjd.

[Charlie Behrens]

What was.

[Miles]

This is the wwcd. What would Charlie do?

[Charlie Behrens]

I'd eat cheese or die or die. All right, folks, nice to see you. Tip your bartender and watch for deer.

[Miles]

See you next one. Love you guys.