Why Catholics Shouldn't Have iPhones #212

Summary

Bellied Up Podcast #212 – "Why Catholics Shouldn't Have iPhones"

Hosts: Charlie Berens & Myles “You Betcha Guy”
Date: August 6, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode, recorded lakeside at Charlie’s cabin after a last-minute location change, serves up the Bellied Up Podcast’s signature blend of Midwest banter, semi-serious philosophical debates, and relatable comedy. Charlie and Myles belly up to discuss the dichotomy of “sitters vs. doers” at the lake, garage project obsession, the AI-hyped alien summer of 2026, skincare, the burden of birthday texts, and the eternal problem of Catholic guilt meeting modern tech. Live callers, as always, bring fresh topics — from motivational slumps and TikTok Shop hustle, to alien disclosure hype, to the social etiquette of birthday messages.

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Key Topics and Moments

1. Lake People: “Sitters” vs. “Doers”

Timestamps: 02:30–07:30

• Myles and Charlie categorize lake-goers into two camps:
  • Doers: Constantly organizing activities or “projects."
  • Sitters: Prefer just being — sitting, drinking, soaking in the view.
• Charlie self-identifies as an activities guy, describing his obsession with reorganizing his garage and constructing elaborate, mobile wood caddies and shelves to “support future projects.”
• Notable quote (Charlie, 06:11): “I'm not even kidding you. I go to sleep at night thinking about my garage. That’s just a factual thing coming out of my mouth right now.”
• Myles: “You are prepping yourself to be hammering out projects, but spend all summer doing projects for future projects instead of actual projects.”

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2. Garage Organization Riff and Caster Wheels Gospel

Timestamps: 06:19–11:10

• Charlie’s tips: always put caster wheels (“I got commitment issues”), and at least two brakes, on garage projects for modularity.
• The ever-expanding number of custom wood caddies leads Myles to joke about needing a logbook just to manage Charlie’s “wood storage ecosystem.”
• Notable quote (Charlie, 09:53): "Anytime you're making wood caddies, or workbenches or anything for your garage, you always put caster wheels on them. For the same reason I don't have a tattoo. I got commitment issues.”

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3. Skin Health, Moles, and Dermatology Anecdotes

Timestamps: 17:13–19:30

• The hosts riff on dermatologist appointments, skin cancer checks, and the surprising cost of “the casual upsell” for mole removal.
• Notable quotes:
  • Myles: “All they [dermatologists] do is look at your skin and go, yeah, it looks fine.”
  • Charlie: “I thought that was a pro bono mole, you know, pro molo.” (18:15)
  • Charlie: “Charlie also thinks that strippers are in love with him. He goes to dermatology and just thinks he can get free moles removed if he builds rapport.” (18:22)

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4. Caller 1: Erica – Motivation, TikTok Shop & Aliens

Timestamps: 21:22–66:57

a. TikTok Shop Affiliate Motivation

• Erica, a TikTok Shop skincare affiliate, struggles with maintaining motivation after hitting career and financial goals (“now my motivation is dropping,” 23:57).
• Hosts offer advice: gamify the work, set strict routines, focus on the bigger benefits (e.g., flexible hours with your kids).
• Charlie (25:29): “It's not a video you're doing. It's spending, you know, 12 hours with your kid over the week you couldn't have spent before.”
• Myles: “The task will fill the time allotted. If you give yourself four hours, you'll find a way to do it in four hours.”

b. Are We Tired of Being Sold Stuff?

• Candid discussion about “ad fatigue” on TikTok Shop.
• Erica: “People want to see ads from real people, not AI or commercials."

c. Alien Disclosure & “Men in Black is a Documentary” Riff

• Erica asks: “Are aliens real? Are they here, coming, what do you think?” (30:24)
• Charlie: "They're already here. Jared’s part alien. Right, Jared?" (30:47)
• They discuss the film “Disclosure Day,” current internet lore about channelers like “Bashar” (prophesying alien contact in 2026–27), and various alien races (Grays, Nordics, Reptilians).
• Notable exchange:
  • Myles (36:41): “If aliens can travel intergalactic space, what do we have that they need? It’s classic human ego — we think we’re the center of the universe, but maybe we’re just an anthill.”
  • Charlie: “What do humans have that you can’t find anywhere else? ...Wood.”
• Charlie floats empathy as the “highest evolution,” mirroring the message of the Disclosure film.
• The group riffs on “if aliens contacted you,” with Myles predicting government abduction, and Charlie just wanting a text first—“I want to take it slow.”

d. Aliens, Hot Nordics, and Human-Centric Bias

• Erica details alien “species,” including the idea that some look like beautiful Scandinavians (“Nordics”).
• Myles counters: “No way they’d be attractive to us — our human bias shapes everything.”
• Philosophical punchline: “Aliens might care more about what’s on the inside.” (54:22)

e. Skincare Routines – Real or Alien Hype?

• Erica offers minimalist skincare tips: “Cleanser, moisturizer, eye cream.”
• The guys deflect, joke about putting olive oil (or even Pam) in their beards.
• Notable (Charlie, 65:27): "I'll use olive oil on my beard."

f. Motivational Wrap

• Myles (faux Gary Vee): “If you think that you’ve made it because you got a pool in your backyard — I’ve seen people with above-ground pools in their front yard. Now get out there and make some more videos!” (66:30)

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5. Caller 2: Matt – Birthday Text Fatigue & Catholic Guilt

Timestamps: 67:22–88:47

• Matt asks: “Where’s the cutoff for who you’re required to send a happy birthday text to?”
• The guys agree: it’s gotten out of hand — group chats, auto-replies, and the social obligation loops are “for the birds.”
• Charlie’s Catholic Guilt Theory (75:09):
  • “Catholics should not have text messaging. We have too much Catholic guilt. Protestants don’t care, they never think about it. We’re thinking about it all day.”
• Matt describes the family pressure: “If I do it, I have to wait an hour apart from my brother, or it looks like we both just did it because mom told us.”
• The crew discusses generational and friend-text differences, groupchat etiquette, and strategies to dodge the guilt loop (“Can you take a punch in a conversation and move on?”)
• Notable quotes:
  • Myles: “Evaluate if you’re willing to take a confrontation off the chin. If yes, don’t send it.” (82:48)
  • Matt: “I don’t want a birthday text. Don’t send me one.”
• The hosts also brainstorm new “birthday card” approaches (just wish everyone happy birthday in your Christmas card!) and riff on movement fatigue (“There’s just so many you get exhausted”).

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6. Light Round: Social Movements, Hummingbird Feeders, and Group Chats

Timestamps: 77:56–79:36

• Short tangent: don’t use dye in your hummingbird feeders — just “make your own.”
• Reflection on movement fatigue (“Do we need an anti-dye movement?”), paralleling societal exhaustion over constant causes and online activism.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• Charlie on Garage Obsession:
  "I go to sleep at night thinking about my garage.” (06:11)
• On Lake People:
  “There are two types of lake people. There's the doers and the sitters.” (03:26)
• Myles on Alien Ego:
  “If aliens can get here, what do we have they need? Classic human ego. Maybe we’re just an anthill.” (36:41)
• Charlie’s Catholic Text Theory:
  “Catholics should not have text messaging. Catholics and text messaging do not mix. Protestants don’t care!” (75:09)
• Myles as Gary Vee:
  “If you think you’ve made it because you got a pool in your backyard... Now get out there and make more videos!” (66:30)
• On Skincare:
  Erica: "If it’s only three [steps]: Cleanse, moisturize, eye cream.” (64:04)
• Myles on Confrontation:
  “Evaluate if you’re willing to take a confrontation off the chin. If yes, don’t send it [the birthday text].” (82:48)

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Useful Timestamps

| Segment | Time | |----------------------------------|------------| | Lake Sitter vs. Doer Debate | 02:30–07:30| | Garage Organizing/Caster Wheels | 06:19–11:10| | Skin Health & Dermatology | 17:13–19:30| | Erica on Motivation & TikTok Shop| 21:22–30:00| | Alien Talk w/ Erica | 30:24–66:57| | Skincare Routines | 60:18–66:13| | Matt – Birthday Text Fatigue | 67:22–88:47| | Hummingbird/Motion Fatigue | 77:56–79:36| | Group Chat Philosophy | 84:46–88:06|

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Conclusion

This episode is a perfect encapsulation of Bellied Up’s blend of heartland humor, honest life advice, and “only here” philosophical tangents. Whether you’re a chronic “lake sitter,” a garage project junkie, a skincare dabbler, an alien lore skeptic, or just feeling the weight of Catholic guilt every time you forget a text, Charlie and Myles will make you feel seen. Real people, real talk, and the wisdom of, as Charlie puts it, “knowing what you don’t know.”

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Callers’ shout-outs:

• Erica: @cozyhomebyerica (on TikTok Shop, skincare)
• Product rec: Based (skincare line for men, 65:03)

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Final Note: Don’t forget to tip your bartender and change your air filter!

Transcript

[A]

Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of the Bellied up podcast. I'm here with my buddy Charlie.

[B]

God, I'm excited to live life today, Miles. I'm just looking out at this beautiful lake with my best old buddy right next to me. God. Sturdy shoulders on you, Miles. Sturdy shoulders.

[A]

So before we get too far into the episode, Charlie.

[B]

Yeah?

[A]

We're supposed to be at a bar today.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, wait, let me guess. It's my fault.

[A]

No, no, actually not.

[B]

Oh, really?

[A]

Well, we switched the location for this shoot last minute so that you could be one with your cabin.

[B]

That's not true. That's not why we switched it. That's not why we switched.

[A]

We switched it because we enjoy being at the lake. And we weren't able to get a bar lined up today, but tomorrow we're going to get one.

[B]

And you already started off by criticizing my glasses right before this. Not my facial glass glasses, but my other glasses. And you criticize my facial glasses, too. So what's the issue? What's the issue with the glass?

[A]

Oh, all you would have had to do was just rinse it with a little bit of water, and I think it'd have been fine.

[B]

Are you saying I don't have clean glasses?

[A]

No, they just. If you got bubbles that are sticking to the side of your thing, it's either, like. It's just there's something in there that's catching the bubbles.

[B]

What? Yeah. Really? I mean, there were a ton of bubbles on that glass.

[A]

There was. Now it's good.

[B]

I mean, it was, like, lined with bubbles the whole way.

[A]

So all the dirt is now at the top of the glass with the bubbles.

[B]

I didn't know that. I've gone my whole life and did not learn that. Question for our listeners. Did you guys know that about the bubbles in the side of the glass?

[A]

And again, I'm pretty sure that that's what it means. But, like, if you ever. If you've ever liked, gone to, like, a brewery, they'll flip the glass over and they'll rinse it before they put a beer in there so that they ensure that there's no, like, dust particles or anything on the inside of the glass.

[B]

I mean, in my brief time bartending, I did do recall doing that, but I didn't know that was the reason.

[A]

I think it is. So.

[B]

It's wild how many things in our lives just go over our heads and then, you know, you can only dodge information so long before it hits you square between the Sears, you know. Yeah.

[A]

So. So, yeah, we're Bellied up at Chuck's cabin. We're still bellied up here, though, right? Up.

[B]

Bellied up. Indeed.

[A]

Charlie, there's something that I have noticed about people at the lake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it became very prevalent when I went to my buddy's cabin, and my buddy is an activities at the lake guy.

[B]

Nice dude.

[A]

And my family is more of a small amount of activities. And the only activity you do do is work. Yeah. You know, like, so it's like, that's what. We're limited in activities, and then the rest of the time, we just like to sit. We're just. We're sitting people at the lake, whether that's on the dock, whether that's in a lawn chair, whether that's on the porch, whether that's in the boat. You know, we. We get out and do stuff, but it's mostly sitting activities. Go to the bar and sit.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. Okay.

[A]

And so I think that you can almost categorize lake people into two buckets.

[B]

There are two types of lake people. There's the doers and the sitters.

[A]

Yes. In half of the people like to do stuff at the lake, where they're constantly doing activities all day long and they're exhausted by the end of the day, and then the sitters are exhausted from doing nothing. All.

[B]

You know what the difference is, Miles? I think is that some people, they got a lot going on in the mind. Okay. And vacation can be really scary because that's when it slows down. Right. And so you got to keep that mind occupied with the next project or the next activity or the next thing. Because God forbid you slow down enough to start feeling your feelings. What are you going to do?

[A]

Drink.

[B]

That's it. That's both.

[A]

They're. They're. Both sides are. You know, there's are, you know, like, oh, I do a bunch of activities. I don't need to drink at the lake. That's because you're just keeping your mind occupied with activities. Whereas if you're a sitting group of people at the lake, you keep your mind occupied with drinking.

[B]

We're all just a bunch of squeezes sniffing out that dopamine, you know?

[A]

I mean, my read on you is that you are an activities guy at the lake.

[B]

Am I an activity? I just had the whole family here about a week ago, two weeks ago, something like that. And I redid my whole garage.

[A]

I mean, during family time.

[B]

Yes. Well, I. It's not during. Like, I would be around for family time, certainly, but, you know, everybody's going off doing their Things throughout the day, and I was doing that stuff, too. But I. I would steal little, little moments for Charlie because it's my vacation, too, and I got that garage looking just good, you know? And I'll tell you this. There's nothing that, like, I go to sleep at night thinking about my garage. I'm not even kidding you. I'm not just saying that because we're on a podcast. I'm trying to sound somewhat goofy or interesting. That's just a factual thing coming out of my mouth right now.

[A]

Very jacked to show us his garage yesterday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think he was a little upset that we said, hey, when we get there, let's hop on the boat and go cruising and fish a little bit. I think you were like. But in your head, you were like, but first I'd like to show you the garage.

[B]

I mean, I was saving it up, you know, kind of like. And I got it.

[A]

We.

[B]

We had limited sunlight. Let's get out in the boat. Let's have some pies from Pie. Let's look at the sky. My guy. And pie is a pizza place in Three Lakes, Wisconsin. Shout out and. But anyways, yeah, I was excited to get you in that garage, Miles, looking at my wood.

[A]

Um, I think what's very funny about Charlie in his garage is Charlie, in the last this summer, has spent more time organizing his wood in his garage than he has building anything with his garage. With his wood.

[B]

Well, no, I built some stuff with the wood I've been organizing, so I use the wood. Actually, a great way to store some scrap wood is to make a shelf out of it, because if you ever need the wood, you can just disassemble it. Disassemble it. So I have made a wood caddy. New shelf. I took some old banisters, and I strung those suckers up, put some little hooks on them. Now I got all my garden tools organized. I got my chainsaws right where they need to be, and I got the bikes hung up on another one. Ooh. Oh, it's feeling good. You know what I'm going to do next, Miles? Why don't you ask?

[A]

What are you going to do next?

[B]

I'm going to build a very long tool bench slash bar right in the middle.

[A]

Tool bench slash wood storage slash bar. Charlie has. You have so many things to store wood now.

[B]

When you take down a deck, Miles, you get a lot of good wood. What am I supposed to do with it, huh? What am I supposed to do?

[A]

Jared, at some point today, you need to go to the garage and take a photo of his pallet. Pallet, wood storage.

[B]

Oh, God.

[A]

So Charlie took a wood pallet. Yeah, he just screwed, like, caster wheels. Caster wheels to the bottom of the pallet and then built, like a. Like, a containment thing around it on top of the wood pallet and then just started piling wood in it. And he put so much wood in there, there's so much weight, that the pallet is now bottomed out under the ground.

[B]

It's not bottomed out yet, but here's what I'll say about that.

[A]

There's literally a giant bow in the pallet.

[B]

It is. It's looks sick. Here's what I'll say about that. I. So it was like I had. I built the wood caddy, which looks nice, I think. You know, it's not perfect. Don't.

[A]

Don't get too close to wood caddy.

[B]

The wood caddy is all the way in back against the wall, also on caster wheels that can roll around.

[A]

But that's the one. That's the. A frame, though.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Guys, I'm telling you, he. Like, you almost need a, like, logbook for all of the wood storage. And it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What do you call the one that you put underneath the shelf that you can't get out now?

[B]

So I did. I built myself in. So I had a. I had a slide in wood caddy underneath my shelf for. For the logs. Now, when you take down. So this is a log cabin. You get some extra logs, and these are nice pieces of wood. Okay. These trees lived a beautiful life, and they gave themselves, like, the giving. Anyway, you.

[A]

You're not getting rid of the shelf next to the shelf. So now he can't get the log caddy out from underneath it.

[B]

True. But I. I did. It's not that I didn't think about that. Like, I was doing, like, a thing for the brandy of, like, how to reorganize this part of your garage. But that was outside of the video purview, so I just forgot about it. And then when I put that there, I was like, oh, son of a gun. Hope I don't need those logs for a little bit. So. But when I do, I'm gonna. I mean, actually, I've already thought about this. I'm gonna move the shelf to the other wall. And this is why, guys, anytime you're making wood caddies, or anytime you're making workbenches or anything for your garage, you always put caster wheels on them. I'm a big caster Wheel guy. For the same reason I don't have a tattoo. I got commitment issues. And I think that that's something that's very important.

[A]

I will have to say that is a good piece of advice. If you can put caster wheels on it, you never know on everything.

[B]

And make sure you get at least one of those wheels has a break on it. Ideally opposite sides. Okay. Because that stuff will roll. Now, here's what I was thinking about, Miles. Here's what I was.

[A]

This is what's getting me going.

[B]

So I get a little. I'm going to build a kind of like a platform. So take like 4x4 type area. Okay. So 4x4. I'm going to elevate it a little bit. Put some caster wheels and then take those deck boards and put them on top. Okay. So it's like a little 4x4 pallet that goes around. I can put various projects on these pallets. So when I want to bring them to the main stage, they come along. I put the locks on the wheels. And now I've got. Now I've got this project I'm working on. Right. And then I got a project on the bench. You know, it's just a rotating. And when I'm done with, you know, those kinds of things, I can use them to move the tractor equipment, the attachments.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, you were talking about that. So here's a question.

[B]

And.

[A]

And I'm support this. I think this is like the most forethought Charlie's ever had in like the last 10 years, at least.

[B]

Yeah. I draw this stuff on a plane when I'm bored.

[A]

Well, what I mean is, is like you are prepping yourself to be hammering out projects.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Like, your projects are all about assisting projects instead of doing projects.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, you're doing projects, but all the projects are so that you can make future projects easier. But in reality, you spent an entire summer doing projects that aren't projects.

[B]

But once the projects. Once the projects for the future projects are projected to be done. I mean, I'm going to be.

[A]

The amount of projects you're going to

[B]

be able to get done is going to be astronomical.

[A]

It's unbelievable how many projects you're getting done after doing all the projects so that you can support your future projects.

[B]

And anyone who's out there doing projects is going, oh, yeah, sure.

[A]

And I'm with you. I like, I'm proud of you because this is the most. I wish you did a little bit more of that in like this podcast and like, in your content, I think. I think.

[B]

I think you go a long way

[A]

that you benefit from the building projects for projects mentality in all areas of your life.

[B]

Well, you know, Miles, you've got to discover it to borrow from it, right? You got to, like, you got to dig the well in order to get the water, right? Yeah. So I'm digging the well. The well in the brain that allows forethought to come and flourish in other areas. You know, irrigation, it's going to irrigate the other parts of. Of my life that do not have for. Allow it to grow, concern or care. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

But, yeah, your garage is looking good. It is clean. I. What was the thing that I said towards the end of your. Your garage tour, though? Do you remember?

[B]

What the fuck is this wire doing hanging off the ceiling?

[A]

No, I mean, that wire was hot,

[B]

by the way, but it wasn't hot. Well, it was a warm wire. It wasn't a hot wire. Okay. The circuit was complete. It was a warming wire for the pipes. It didn't need to be plugged in. Yes, it was, but wasn't a hot wire. You can't tell people I got hot wires.

[A]

Yeah, you're right. It was a warm wire.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

His garage is starting to fill up. And I said, could you. Can you imagine what this garage is going to look like in 20 years? And I think the visual was you walk in, you're like, all right, this is my garage. You're like, cool, let's go to the other side. You have to fucking shimmy through all of the stuff you're going to have in 20 years.

[B]

Yes. He's saying that because I didn't throw out an old sump pump. Okay. But in my defense, it had a lot of copper in it. Okay.

[A]

And in your Charlie's 7, I gotta show you all the copper I got. And then he couldn't find it. I don't know, there might be a copper thief in the area.

[B]

I don't know where that copper went. It wasn't like a lot of copper. It was. I think it was about six and a half dollars worth of copper. But I took apart that sump pump and like four minutes. So if you do the math on that. $6aminute. Jared, are you good at math?

[A]

$6 for four minutes or six for four minutes? Like, it's like a $50 per minute almost. Okay, so you're basically pretty good.

[B]

70 bucks an hour.

[A]

An hour, right.

[B]

90 bucks an hour. Good thing. I like.

[A]

But yeah, I mean, I'M excited to see what it turns into over the next. And that's. That's the. The measure of a good garage is not what it is when you get it. It's what it looks like 20 years down the road. And is it full, you know?

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Kind of like the measure of a good life is how full your garage is.

[B]

Yeah, that's exactly.

[A]

Things that you've collected over the years. The, this, the. The wood caddies you've built. I mean, you have another shed on the other part of the property. Yeah, I'm really. I can't. I'm very excited to see the wood caddies that you build in that thing because you got a lot of space in there.

[B]

Space to grow, baby. Now I will say I'm getting a little tuned up just thinking I'm. I would, I would I have in my like back in Milwaukee in my duplex in the top. Oh, that fly just went in the beer shoot in the top. I've got enough wood in the upper level of that garage which you can't go up to. Like it's a double decker garage, believe it or not, a one and a half story garage. But it's technically should be like. You can't go on the second floor because it's like not safe. But.

[A]

And this is like. I mean, what. This is becoming a thing.

[B]

I.

[A]

You buy property.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That is unsafe.

[B]

Well, my.

[A]

You got this garage and literally guys, he had to replace. Not even replace. He just added an extra header all the way the width of the garage.

[B]

Well, did you want it to fall?

[A]

The floor was just drooping.

[B]

It was bowing a little bit.

[A]

Do you inspect the property before you buy it?

[B]

Do I. No, you get an inspector. And where the hell was he on that, huh?

[A]

Did you actually inspect the place?

[B]

I. Yeah, I walked through it. Me. But you get an actual inspector, Miles. Actual inspector, someone.

[A]

But did you hire an inspector? I know that that's what you're supposed to.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, I did.

[A]

And he didn't say anything about it? No, he said something about it. And you just decided to ignore that?

[B]

Honestly, it could have been either. Because I have no idea what's on that report. But I will say there's a lot of screwed up stuff going on in, you know, anything you buy. And by you, I mean me. What were we going to talk about before? We just went way off the deep end here, Miles.

[A]

We're talking about activity and sitting people at the lake.

[B]

So, Miles, sitting at the lake. Where's your favorite place to sit. Is it on that screened in porch? Is it outside on the deck or is it on the boat? Boat.

[A]

I like the screened in porch and I like sitting on the boat. But underneath the canopy, you know, I'm to the age where I hey, the sun is undefeated. I don't need more than more than I need.

[B]

Your skin's looking good. I will say, though, I'm not seeing any dark spots. By the way, folks, set up an appointment with your dermatologist. It takes about three years.

[A]

And do it now so that when you come of age of needing a dermatology appointment, you have one.

[B]

I mean, can you believe they're turning people away from being dermatologists? You know, we need all those suckers that we can get.

[A]

All they do is just look at your skin and go, yeah, it looks fine.

[B]

Yeah. Or they're like, you want me to cut that off for you? You know, and then they freeze it. I had them cut a mole off and I was like, yeah, let's do it now.

[A]

I got the bill.

[B]

I was like, I didn't know I was being charged for that. I thought that was a pro bono mole, you know, pro molo.

[A]

Charlie also thinks that strippers are in love with him. He goes to dermatology and he thinks he can just build rapport with the dermatologist and just get free moles removed.

[B]

I thought they were doing me a solid, dude. Honestly, though, for the amount of time it takes to remove.

[A]

Have you ever been to the doctor? When do they ever just do you a solid?

[B]

I don't know. The way it was offered, though, was like a solid, you know? You want me to just take that off for you real quick? I was like, yeah, I think they

[A]

call that the casual upsell. Okay, got you got.

[C]

Got.

[B]

Like I got. Well, what I don't got is a mole on my hairline so I don't have to feel it every time I go to the barber. Before, it was like, you know when they comb your hair at the. Yeah, I'm like. And I didn't ever want to tell my to mole there, you know, because I was like, can you go soft around my mole?

[A]

It's so lame.

[B]

Yeah, I know. It's like, you know, you know, I

[A]

have a tender mole on my hairline. If you could avoid that, please, that'd be great.

[B]

But it's gone. And honestly. Oh, you can't even see it, dude. Somewhere there.

[A]

I know, but like, you see it

[B]

scar maybe somewhere, like right around here or here. I forget which side. I think it's there. Do you see a scar?

[A]

This dermatologist does some good work. I don't see sound work.

[B]

I mean, and it's also. God did me a favor putting on the hairline because if this mole wasn't on my hairline, and let's say it was right here where this mole is, it would be like one of those, like, witches moles.

[A]

Be like the guy on Austin Powers.

[B]

Moly. Moly. Moly. Moly. Yeah. What are we doing here, Miles?

[A]

We're podcasting. I forgot.

[B]

Are we gonna take some callers? What do you think?

[A]

Take some callers. Let's do it. It's August 6th. And that means what? The Wisconsin State Fair is officially open.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Your Super Bowl.

[B]

Yes, it is. Here, Myles. I'm gonna have those deep fried Snickers and the deep fried Tootsie Rolls. I'm gonna have the deep fried carrots. I'm gonna have the deep fried Twinkies. I'm gonna have the deep fried bratwurst. I'm gonna have the deep fried bratwurst in the bun.

[A]

You know what I like about the state fair, Charlie?

[B]

The deep fried.

[A]

It's the only place where you can watch a cow get judged at noon.

[B]

Mm.

[A]

Five minutes later, eat something that should not legally fit on a stick just like you were talking about getting there. It's is his own event too, Charlie. You know this. Cars crawling around West Alice. People are reading parking signs two seconds too late. And pedestrians are appearing between parked cars like they unlocked a bonus level. One sudden stop and one bad turn or one driver staring at the map instead of the road can turn into a great fair. Turn a great fair day into an actual accident. Someone else's mistake leaves you injured. Nicolay Law is the Midwest team. You want in your corner.

[B]

That's right, baby. Call 1-855- Nicolay hi, is this Erica?

[D]

Yes. Is this Miles?

[A]

Yes, it is. I got Charlie here with me, too.

[D]

Hi, Charlie.

[A]

Erica.

[B]

What's cooking?

[D]

Not much. I'm just trying to organize myself for the work week.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[D]

What about you guys?

[B]

Well, it's.

[A]

It's Monday, so you don't work Mondays.

[D]

I work from home and I work for myself, kind of. So I organize myself and, you know, sometimes it's hard. Sometimes I just want to do nothing and, you know, but I'm trying to get self motivated today.

[A]

Okay, well, we could probably help out with that.

[D]

Charlie, I would love if you helped.

[B]

She's making the wood caddies in her mind, Miles. That's what she's doing.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Erica. What? Do you need help with what's here?

[A]

Yeah. What's your job?

[D]

Okay, so I'm a TikTok Shop affiliate. Do you know what TikTok Shop is?

[A]

Yes, we know what TikTok Shop is.

[B]

That's like, on TikTok. It's like Q. QVC.

[D]

Yeah, yeah. Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Some people don't know what TikTok Shop is. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe I'm talking to too many old

[B]

people, but to be honest with you, I wasn't totally sure what TikTok Shop was. I thought it. Okay, is it. Is it?

[A]

They're like, you're an old guy. I mean, this is just.

[B]

I'm an old guy. Jared is literally setting up a fan for you right now.

[A]

I never asked for that. I never asked for that. That is solely on his own discretion here.

[B]

But TikTok Shop is a, like, where you can buy stuff on TikTok, right?

[D]

So I make videos for different brands. Specifically, like, Korean skincare. I do a lot of Korean skincare videos. So the brands send me the products, and then it's up to me. I could make, you know, 40 videos a day, or I can make zero videos a day. So.

[A]

And you only get paid off of commission?

[D]

Yes, mostly. But then sometimes brands will offer me a retainers. Like, they'll offer me, you know, a couple hundred dollars per video. So it depends, but mostly commission. And I worked, like, so hard the last year to, like, get me and my kids, like, in a new house. And, like, I hustled so hard, and now we're, like, in a house with a pool and life is great. And now, like, now, like, my motivation is, like, dropping.

[B]

All right, Miles. Gary Veer, right now.

[D]

Yeah, please.

[A]

I mean, this is. This is also just part of the process. Do you know what I mean?

[D]

Totally.

[A]

Part of the. Part of the process is working hard to get, you know, your nuts squirreled away for winter, and then you get comfortable with it, and then you lose motivation. You realize that it was never, ever. It's not because you like this job. It's because you like what you can get from the job. Is that correct?

[D]

I like both. I feel so grateful that I get to work, like, two or three hours a day making videos and I don't have to go anywhere and I can be home and, like, I'm. It's such an amazing opportunity, yet I still struggle with, like.

[A]

Right, but. But what you just said was what you can get from the job, and that is time freedom and financial freedom, you know?

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

So you gotta find A way to find something that you like about the job. It doesn't have to be making the videos. It could be the process of coming up with the different ways to do a video, you know?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And. Yeah. I mean, you just hit the point where you realized, like, oh, God, yeah, this was all about getting the money.

[B]

Yeah, but, but, but it's not just about the money. You just had to envision. It's not a video you're doing. It's spending, you know, 12 hours with your kid over the week you couldn't have spent with them before.

[A]

Gymnastic as well.

[D]

Right.

[B]

Yeah. So don't think about as. I gotta finish this video. Just thinking about is I gotta spend all this time with my kids, you know?

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Build the pressure on yourself, you know.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. Find some guilt in there, you know,

[A]

but in a more real sense, if you can figure out a thing that you think is very fun with it and just focus on that, you're gonna. That's what's going to help get you motivated.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Gamify it for yourself. Okay, but listen, you didn't call in here to talk about your TikTok.

[A]

I do have a question about the TikTok affiliate.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

So I think people are you. Okay. So when I see someone trying to sell stuff on TikTok Shop, and it's great that you are able to have make a living off, and I think that's good. And I don't want to take that away. But at some point, do you feel like as a society we're getting tired of people selling stuff on TikTok shop or not?

[D]

Oh, for sure, for sure. So. But I'm gonna keep doing it until it doesn't pay the bills. But I do think so. I think people, though, enjoy if we have to see advertisements, I think people want to see them from real people as opposed to AI or as opposed to, like, produced commercials, you know? So I think it's still the. I think it's still the best way to receive our, you know, advertisement and finding out about new products to see it from real people. Because TikTok shop affiliates are just normal people. Like, we're not influencers, typically.

[B]

Yeah, but.

[A]

But at what point do you cross over and you are. Because it's your entire job.

[D]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

What I will say, though, is this is just the same version of watching TV and it's either QVC or it's a 1-800-commercial. You know what I mean? Like Fushigi miles.

[A]

Fushigi, 100%.

[B]

I mean, or that little piece of plastic that you would like, do that to get like.

[A]

Oh, yeah. The Spin on the ground.

[B]

Spin on the ground to get some abs.

[A]

The Thigh Master.

[B]

Thigh Master.

[A]

The Bow Flex. The Shake Weight.

[B]

The Shake Weight.

[A]

You sold any Shake Weights on TikTok Shop yet?

[D]

No, I haven't. I do mostly skincare.

[B]

Okay. How's your skin looking these days?

[D]

Good.

[B]

You've been to a dermatologist recently?

[D]

No, I haven't. I should, though.

[B]

Book of an appointment today.

[A]

You can see him in three years.

[D]

Book an appointment today.

[B]

Yep. And in three years you'll see him just because. Yeah. You can never get into a dermatologist. And be careful when you go. Every mole is about $600, right? Yeah.

[D]

Right. And they want to remove everything, right?

[B]

Well, that's because that's how they make their money. They're surgeons, you know.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

So anyways, are you done? Miles, you want to ask her more about this?

[A]

No. Yeah. I was just curious what you thought about that. And I just know that I've seen some sentiment of, like, all right. God, I'm just getting pushed. People trying to push me to buy these stuff off Tick Tock Shop.

[D]

For sure.

[A]

So.

[C]

For sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. It's good stuff, though. It's not like TEMU stuff. Like, a lot of the brands are really good brands, so I don't ever push anything that I know is. You know, I always push stuff I really love.

[A]

So that's good.

[B]

That's good.

[A]

But, yeah, I mean, there's got to be something about this job that you like.

[D]

Yeah, I do. I love the skincare. I love getting all the products. I love trying them and using them and making videos about them. I do love it. I just like relaxing, too. And now that I have the option every day, like, you could relax or you could work. It's just very. It's hard to.

[A]

Why don't you do both?

[D]

Yeah. Okay.

[A]

Why don't you just say, like, all right, I work from 8am to noon every day, and then I relax the rest of the day.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

And then you're like, well, that's not enough time to get stuff done. Well, it's like, then you should just, like, the. The task will fill the time allotted. So if you're like, I got four hours every day to make this money, then you'll just get it done in four hours.

[D]

That's good. I like that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Sometimes I set an alarm. If I gotta do something I don't wanna do, I say, all right, it's gonna be done. 15 minutes.

[D]

Oh, that's good.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it never happens. 15 minutes. But I do set the alarm.

[A]

But you do get it done.

[B]

I do get it done, and I get it done a little bit faster. I have to just reset the alarm for another 15 minutes. But it's so annoying to do that. That finally I'm like, screw it. I'm just. I'm done. I just send it, and then I'm still alive. It's all good.

[D]

Yeah, I'm gonna do that.

[A]

Yeah. All right. Well, why'd you call in today?

[D]

Okay, so I am super curious what you guys think. Think about aliens. Like, are they real? Are they here? Are they coming? Like, where do you guys stand on that whole thing?

[B]

Well, you see Men in Black, right?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Okay, that's.

[D]

So that's your stance.

[A]

They're already here.

[B]

They're already here.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. They're living amongst us. Jared's an alien. Part alien. Right? Your father was an alien? Yeah, I'm from Orion's Belt.

[A]

Yeah. You're a Belter, then. I'm a Belter, yeah.

[B]

The secret is on.

[D]

Did you guys. Did any of you see Disclosure Day?

[B]

Not yet.

[D]

Oh, okay.

[B]

I heard it was pretty good.

[D]

It gets me. Yeah. I got mixed reviews. Some people really loved it, and some people thought it was stupid.

[B]

Well, they just didn't get it.

[A]

So for those of us who haven't seen us, give us a little premise here. So I know we're talking about.

[D]

Okay, so, like, Emily Blunt is the main character, and then there's another.

[A]

What is the premise? What's the premise of the show?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Oh, the premise of the show is that disclosure, like, the information is out now about aliens or. Or it comes out in the movie. So you follow, like, Emily Blunt's character. She basically starts, like, channeling an alien, and then she has to deliver this message. But, like, the government agency doesn't want her to get the information out. Like, they're trying to keep all the information they have about aliens kind of secret because they think it's too big for the people to understand. And it's that government agency feels it's best for the people if they don't know about this. And so it's just like, this battle, the whole movie, to get the information out.

[B]

And so is that where she talks like, yes, yes.

[D]

Yeah, it is.

[B]

I saw that in the ad.

[D]

It's so good. Her acting is incredible in that movie. It's really good.

[B]

Maybe, Miles, we should go see it in theaters later today.

[A]

We could do that. Instead of doing the podcast.

[B]

Hey, we could. Let's set a timer and get this podcast done in 45 minutes.

[A]

Is there a matinee there could be town that we can go to? Yeah, if we just set an alarm for 15 minutes, we can get it done. The whole podcast.

[B]

Let's do it, dude.

[A]

Start talking faster then.

[B]

Yeah. All right. 1.8 speed. All right. So what do you really think about aliens?

[D]

So I think. I don't know, but I think that they are coming, like, supposedly, if in the alien community, which it doesn't sound like you guys have done a lot of research in the alien community.

[A]

Oh, my God. Don't even. Don't try and woman explain me space here. I've done plenty of research.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

So, Miles, please, please mansplain this woman on space. Then let us hear.

[A]

I have. I have thought long and hard about aliens and space. I have. Okay, But I want to hear what you think first. I want to hear what you think first.

[D]

Okay? So do you guys. Have you heard of Bashar? No. Yeah. So the guy in Syria. So there's a man named Daryl Anka, and he claims to channel Bashar, who is an alien.

[B]

Okay, cool.

[A]

What does. So you believe in that?

[D]

I don't know.

[B]

Well, what is Bashar saying?

[D]

That's what I was calling to see what you guys think, because I don't know. So Bashar says. And Bashar's been channeling through this Daryl Inca guy for like 40 years. Like, you can go back and see all his stuff for years. But he says that 2026 is the year of disclosure, and then 2027 is the year of open contact.

[B]

Did he also say that about 2023 and 2024?

[D]

Right. And that's what. And why that's what people say. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. I don't know. I don't know. But I heard him saying about the year of disclosure before I knew about the movie Disclosure Day. Okay, and then. And then that came out. And then. So Bashar claims that next year is the year of open contact and that aliens are already here living among us. That there's lots of hybrids, some people like that we know of. Jared, like. Or maybe a hybrid. Jared could be one. Okay.

[A]

Okay. That makes sense. I would like to pose a question.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

If aliens are coming, if that me. If they can.

[B]

That's how they make more.

[A]

Well, we don't know that. Actually. They might not. They might not make new aliens by coming. We don't know.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I would like the first ignorant thing about aliens that you just said,

[B]

what

[A]

if they don't have penises and vaginas?

[B]

Okay, we don't need to get crass here.

[D]

I don't think they do. I don't think they do.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Clearly doesn't know anything about aliens. What a moronic thing to say, Charlie.

[B]

What a mind. Oh, that's how they do it.

[A]

There you go. Now you're starting to think. So if they can travel intergalactic space or know how to use wormholes or whatever, right? They have the technology to be able to do that. The energy source, to be able to go that far in a short amount of time, travel close to the speed of light, all that shit. What do we have that they would need that they're like, we got to get to Earth. If they can do all of that, what do we have that they need?

[D]

It's our resources on Earth, apparently.

[A]

Right? But they've already figured out with the resources they have, how to get to Earth. I don't think they need anything from Earth, okay? Is what I. Is what I'm saying. It's like a classic. Humans think they're the center of the universe and that everything's coming to us, when in reality we might be an ant on an ant hill in the universe. When was the last time you said, oh, I gotta get inside that ant hill and see what's going on? You know what I mean?

[B]

Mowing the lawn.

[A]

You're. You're an isolated, isolated incident.

[B]

Well, I'll say this, though. What do humans have that you can't find anywhere else in the universe?

[A]

Wood.

[B]

Wood.

[D]

That's true.

[B]

Well, and I have a lot of wood.

[A]

So that is an over. It is an overstatement. Right? Because it's like if the universe is actually infinite, that means that we are not special. That means that there's an infinite amount of Earths out there. Because the way that infinity works is that there's infinite options for everything.

[B]

I love it when he does that. I love it when he explains how infinity works to me.

[A]

So why would they come to Earth then?

[B]

Because, Miles, they are not that advanced. They have aliens.

[A]

They can't have to be an artist, travel through the amount of space they would need to travel.

[B]

Well, that's assuming they need to travel through that amount of space that you think they need to know how to travel. You know, Miles, we're viewing this all through what you can perceive. Unfortunately, the world out there is past your perception. Wouldn't you say? That's right, Eric?

[A]

Just because you talk like that doesn't make what you're saying better.

[B]

What if they need our soul? And what if. What if they need us to give it up willingly? Like vampires welcome them in?

[A]

That. That's a better argument than wood.

[B]

No, no, it's pretty good argument.

[D]

Yeah, I do think it's more about the resources, like wood and maybe, I don't know, gold.

[B]

Gold, yeah, I've heard that.

[A]

But gold is. It's a commodity in the universe. Every asteroid's got gold on it.

[D]

Well, what about this? Maybe they're like, well, meaning, Maybe they want to help us. Maybe they're not looking to get something for themselves.

[A]

So you know how human nature works. The people who are in the position of power to be able to travel space. Do you think they're in it for helping aliens?

[D]

No. No, I don't.

[B]

But what if aliens are more evolved?

[D]

That's what I think.

[B]

And they've learned what every good book has told us, is that love will guide the way.

[D]

Right? And that was the theme of the Disclosure movie. The whole, like, the message at the end was like that empathy is the greatest gift because the main character, Emily Blunt's main character, empathy was like her strength. That was her gift. That's why they chose her to, you know, channel through and bring this message, which I thought was really cool, because I think empathy is the solution to all of our problems.

[C]

It is.

[B]

It is. Wow. I came up with that. I didn't even see the movie, Miles. I could have written this movie. Could have written the damn movie. But what am I doing playing with

[A]

my board with that? Like the final evolution of a living being is becoming all empathetic.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, I think so too. I think. And that's what we like to promote here on the Bellied up podcast, Empathy. Do you think aliens are in the ocean? Is your name Emily, or am I just.

[A]

No, Emily Blunt. You're mixing it. This is Erica.

[B]

Erica. I knew it. Start with an E. Sorry, Erica. What's your Tik Tok handle? What's. Shout it Out.

[D]

Cozy Home by Erica.

[B]

Cozy Home by Erica, not Emily.

[D]

And Erica's with a K. Ooh, nice.

[B]

Cool. All right, Erica. I like that.

[D]

But what were we saying?

[B]

I got us off track. Shoot. I don't know. What were we saying? Miles, do you remember? Yeah, go ahead, Erica.

[D]

So I. So if there's open contact, would you guys want to be contacted by aliens? Or would you want them to leave you alone?

[B]

They could text me.

[D]

They could text you. Okay. You want to take it slow?

[B]

I want to. I'm not sure. It depends. Yeah, start with a text, and we'll see if it goes to a phone call.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

What about you, Miles?

[A]

I mean, if that happens, you basically give up your entire life.

[D]

Oh, you think so?

[A]

Yeah. If you're the one they're contacting, you're going to be seized by the government and you're never going to see your family again.

[B]

That requires us to take in a lot of assumptions that I think are based off of pessimism, Miles.

[A]

Okay, so what? So I get contacted by aliens? If I am able to prove that to anyone, what do you think is going to happen?

[B]

Did you guys hear a Mile said? What a freaking.

[A]

Yeah, Geez. That is true. If I do get contact, no one's gonna believe me. But then I'm just gonna get put in a psych ward and I won't see my family.

[B]

Or you'll become.

[A]

Everything leads back to not seeing your family anymore. As soon as you contact aliens, or

[B]

you'll see them, why would you have.

[D]

Why would you have to tell somebody or why would you have to prove it? Why couldn't you just talk to the aliens and be like, that was really cool. And then you tell your grandkids these stories forever?

[A]

Yeah, because you're not like, oh, Grandpa's so cool. He talked to aliens. Grandpa's a crazy person. He thinks he talked to aliens.

[D]

That's true. That's true.

[A]

So now you're souring your memory with your grandchildren.

[B]

I'll do it.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

I'll do it. Okay, I'll talk to you.

[D]

All right. Charlie's in. Miles is out.

[B]

Charlie, what's the first thing you would ask an alien man? What does the Milky Way taste like?

[A]

Charlie might be the best person to talk to aliens. Yeah, because they're gonna be like, oh, my God, did he find a way to be able to taste the Milky Way? Does he know more than we know by simply just spewing out wild shit? What else would you ask them?

[B]

What would I ask them? I'd say, can you walk on the ocean floor? Yeah.

[A]

With enough weight you can.

[B]

Well, can you, though? I don't think with enough weight because I think the pressure.

[A]

Well, yeah, but. Yeah, you'd have to be in a pressurized deal.

[B]

Well, see, but even then, can you. Or are you in a pressurized deal? Can you walk on the ocean floor?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

How would they know that if they'd never been to Earth?

[B]

Oh, they live in the ocean. Do you think they live in the ocean, Erica, with a K?

[D]

I think that's Possible. A lot of people believe that.

[B]

Isn't it crazy that anything is possible in this world? And we know a lot about this world, but there's so much we don't know. And, Miles, that's wisdom. Is knowing what you don't know, something you can learn from.

[A]

Thank you, Charlie.

[D]

That's good.

[A]

I will.

[B]

Yeah. I will learn. Do you think when you catch a fish, it appreciates the momentary ability to fly?

[D]

I hope so. I hope so.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It is.

[A]

Like, do you think they get back and then be like, guys, you will not believe what just happened to me.

[B]

You gotta try it.

[A]

You gotta try it. See that over there? Go put your mouth on it. It's a rush.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

What's your favorite? Do you guys love to fish? Like, what's your favorite fish to, you know, fish for?

[B]

Oh, gosh. Well, Miles has been getting going with some bass. He's been showing me bass packs.

[A]

I just. I got a little honey hole of bass off the end of my dock, which is very nice with having a child who's not old enough to go fishing on the boat yet. We've tried it. I have a cabin. Yeah, but like, like, he's, you know, he's not old enough to go fishing on the boat yet because we brought him out there, and he brought his little fishing rod, and he just threw his rod in the lake. It's at the bottom.

[D]

Oh, that's so cute.

[A]

So we're not ready yet. It's what we found out.

[B]

Did you get it?

[A]

The bobber bass thing? The rod is gone.

[B]

No. Erica, we got to tell you about bobber bass real quick.

[A]

I talked about that on this, but I feel like we have.

[B]

We haven't talked about it. So. Okay. So Miles got his kid a hot rod rod. Okay. Hot Wheels rod. And it had a bobber on it. Okay. And the bobber was connected to a hook, but the bobber and the hook were its own attachment. So Jake tied on the bobber with the hook to the line, and we were out in the boat, and I was like, ah, screw it. I'm gonna fish with Miles as kids pole. I was doing a tick tock shop review of the. Actually was of the Hot Wheels rod.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

And so I send that sucker out there. Bass hits it. I set the hook, but I set the hook with a little bit too much strength, and the line snapped. Also. Jake tied him really bad.

[A]

Snap. It just came untied.

[B]

Jake didn't tie a good knot. But Jake will redeem himself. That is coming. So now we saw a Bobber sitting there. I was like, miles, we gotta go get the bobber.

[A]

Yeah. So the fish had the hook in its mouth and attached to the hook was the bobber, but it wasn't attached to our line anymore. So there's a fish swimming around with basically like a flag over its head so you could see where it was at all times.

[B]

Except when we got close, he ducked underwater and the bobber went underwater like in Jaws, you know, and you see the buoys go under because they shot him. Yeah. So this was like Jaws. So we're like, oh no, we lost bobber bass. So we went back to fishing. But then boop, boop, bobber bass reappeared and so exciting. We spent the next hour chasing bobber bass to all different ends of, of this little bay. And we were screaming and shouting and finally Jake, he took a meps and he cast it out there and he caught the bobber and he pulled it in and we were able to net bobber bass and set him free. Wow. It was a beautiful moment. And there were two rainbows. Two rainbows.

[A]

Double rainbow. And it was raining the whole time?

[B]

Yes.

[D]

That's amazing. That's a story you can tell your grandkids. You don't even have to meet aliens.

[B]

I know. Isn't it cool? That's so cool. Yeah. I don't even know why we're telling this story, but she asked what we fish for. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[D]

Mostly bass.

[A]

My leg. My lake is not considered a fishing lake, but also I take what I can get.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

There's some multi species action though.

[B]

It's actually pretty good fishery. He's got a good fishery.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah, we went out.

[D]

Have you fished for muskies?

[B]

I caught a muskie right off my. The point here.

[D]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. Not to brag, but it was pretty cool.

[D]

In what part? In Wisconsin somewhere.

[B]

Yeah, I can't tell you more than that, but yeah.

[D]

Yeah. Okay. Okay.

[B]

Yeah. Can't give away the fishing spots, you know.

[D]

Yeah, no, I hear you.

[B]

Not here on air.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

But when I communicate with the alien, I'll have them tell you that's the

[D]

first thing they're going to want to know.

[A]

So what did you think of my argument about that? We think we are more important than we are and they don't need anything from us and we actually need stuff from them.

[D]

You think we think we're more important than we are and that they don't need anything from us.

[A]

If they can get here, they don't need anything from us.

[D]

Yeah. So there's a theory that, like, the Grays, do you know, all the different kinds of aliens, like, the Grays apparently, like, used to be human, and they're like us in the future, but they ruined their version of Earth, and so they are trying to help us, not ruin our version of Earth, which we are very steadily doing.

[B]

Yeah, we are hard on our way of doing that.

[D]

Yeah. And, Charlie, by the way, kudos and all that to what, your work on AI centers or data centers. That's really cool. And I really admire you speaking up and speaking out on something as important as that, because I don't think people realize what a big deal it is.

[B]

Thank you, Erica. Yeah, Those things are screwed. Ruin our planet. They're screwing it like a high Life Muskie sign to the bar room wall, you know? Yeah, and. Good analogy, Charlie. That was pretty cool. You can say it, Miles. It's all right. But, yeah, and. And the. The thing is with these. With, you know, there's always those people that just want to, like, take it, you know, it's like the tragedy of the Commons, you know, like, we shouldn't have to pay for everyone for, like, a few people to get rich, basically.

[D]

No kidding. No kidding. I'm with you.

[B]

But yeah. So the Grays, they're the ones trying to warn us. What other aliens are there?

[D]

So you've probably heard of Reptilians. I don't know as much about those, but I feel like they're the bad ones.

[B]

Reptilians, huh? Are those.

[D]

Yeah, have you heard of that?

[B]

No, Erica, you haven't heard of Reptilians? I mean, I've heard of. I've heard something kind of of that nature, but I. Yeah, Yeah. I don't really do explain, Erica.

[D]

Well, so, like. So people. People think like, that the. That the royal family is. That they're Reptilians. Have you heard this?

[A]

Like, the British royal family?

[D]

Yes. I mean, I don't. I don't. I'm not saying I believe that. I'm just saying this is all. I'm trying to just encapsulate all the alien lore.

[B]

Yeah, she's doing the lore that she's explaining. She's not saying she believes it, although it would make sense why their teeth are messed up. But. Okay, so you got the Reptilians in the royal family, and then who else?

[D]

Oh, there's like. There's something called Pleiadians and there's something called Nordics, where they look. The Nordics, I think, look like basically really pale Norwegian people.

[B]

Oh, well, we got a Lot of those. Kind of Wisconsin.

[A]

That's kind of mean to Norwegians to say that they're aliens, but, you know.

[D]

Well, actually, the Nordics are, like, the most beautiful of all the aliens.

[A]

Mm. Good spin zone. Still aliens.

[D]

Well, look them up. Look them up. You would probably choose to be a Nordic if you were going to be an alien.

[A]

That's probably true. That's probably true. Good point.

[B]

So all Nordics are aliens.

[D]

Oh, not like Nordics on Earth, but, like, Nordics is a category of aliens.

[B]

Jared, can you look up hottest Nordic alien?

[D]

Oh, you're going to be blown away.

[A]

Another question for you.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Why. Why does there have to be aliens?

[D]

There doesn't have to be. It could all be fake. I don't. It doesn't have to be, but there's. Once you start looking it up, there's just so much information there. And also ancient people. Like, there's cave drawings of what appears to be aliens visiting people. And like, how did the pyramids get built? A lot of people think aliens built the pyramids.

[B]

Miles, do you think aliens built the pyramids? Because what's the best evidence that aliens built the pyramids? Let me see that. Hot Nord.

[D]

Oh, I would say. Oh, what do you think of the Nordic?

[B]

I mean, wouldn't necessarily swipe right, but. Oh, okay, we may have the but.

[A]

But you got to compare this to other aliens. We're not comparing this to humans.

[B]

Like, oh, yeah.

[A]

I mean, looks like, you know, it's. It's really crazy. That worthy that they look just like us, you know?

[D]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Well, that's their disguise.

[A]

Miles, have you ever watched the movie Project Hail Mary?

[D]

No.

[A]

Or read the book?

[D]

No. What's that about?

[A]

It is a great perspective moment about aliens. You need to watch that movie or read the book.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

Because we assume that all that aliens are like us. And, like, the main alien in that movie doesn't even have eyeballs and can't see anything.

[D]

Oh, wow.

[A]

So, like, is it. Just because we have what we have on Earth doesn't mean that that's what's necessary for the rest of the universe to. Just like Charlie. Assuming that they have sex in order to procreate.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Well, you know, it's like, how can we draw a picture? Be like, that's what an alien looks like when we're only doing that based off of our own human bias.

[D]

That's a really good point.

[A]

Yeah, we should. I'm. I'm guessing that aliens are not beautiful to us. Like, have you ever, like, looked at, like, a. Like, Like a dog and been like, that is just a hot dog. That's just like, I'm really attracted.

[B]

Okay, Miles, can we, like, you're gonna guess, flagged on all sorts of things.

[A]

It's an example of is there's no way we're going to think aliens are attractive because they just won't be made in our image.

[B]

Yeah, they could look like flubber.

[A]

They could look like flubber. But to other flubbers, there may be more attractive flubbers or not. But we look at flubber, we're like, they're all ugly. You know what I mean? Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. Aliens might care more about what's on the inside.

[B]

Oh, wow. Empathy.

[D]

I don't know. Empathy. Yeah. It all comes back to that.

[A]

True. They might be inside out. Their intestines might be on the outside of their body.

[B]

Oh, they could be worms. Oh, dude, if worms are aliens, I am in trouble.

[D]

They might be.

[B]

I have used so many of their beautiful flesh to catch fish.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Why do. Why do fish like worms so much? It's not like worms grow in the water, you know, That's a good question. But then you look at a lure, which is basically like a worm dressed up as a stripper, and you're like, all right. It doesn't matter what you're throwing to a degree, you know, I think you're

[A]

finding out is fishing is a lot of luck and right timing.

[B]

A little bit of skill, though, Miles.

[A]

Yeah, to a point. But if you're not. If you're fishing where there's no fish, then, you know, the skill becomes more about knowing the spots to fish than it is actually the art of fishing.

[B]

Sure. That was a dig on me, because I took them fishing last night. We didn't get anything, Although, not even a bite.

[A]

Well, and when we went to my cabin, how much fish did you catch? Too many to count.

[B]

Well, you have an aquarium right outside. The entire lake is an aquarium, and no one fishes it. I didn't see one fisher the whole time I was there.

[A]

We were there in the middle of the week.

[B]

No.

[A]

Anyways. Yeah, I mean, that's just like, kind of my stance on aliens is to

[B]

assume that there was a pressure change last night. Okay.

[A]

Okay, you're right. Barometric pressure.

[B]

I'll take you out after the show. I'll get you some fish, Miles.

[A]

First we got to go to the matinee of the demolition day. What was it?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Disclosure day.

[B]

Demolition Man. Go. See.

[D]

I think it's streaming.

[B]

Oh, it's streaming?

[D]

Yeah. I think you can Stream it now.

[A]

Was it on Peacock? I don't like. God damn.

[D]

I don't know. I don't know.

[B]

Peacock.

[D]

Apple TV maybe, but.

[A]

Yeah, that's. I mean, that's. My stance on aliens is. I don't. I think that we. There's something in the human code that we require. This fascination that we're not alone, where there's very. Is a good chance that we're alone or we're not alone, but they're so far away that we'll never know that we're not alone.

[B]

We are all seeking.

[A]

I think most people who, like, believe in aliens have not critically thought about how big space is and how big the universe is. And even if there was an alien out there and they left right now, it could take billions of years for them to get here and we'll never know.

[D]

Yeah. So do you want to know how they travel?

[B]

Allegedly, I do.

[A]

Wormholes, sure.

[D]

That could be it. But, like, apparently it's some kind of frequency. Like, you get on a frequency and then you. And you travel that way by just, like, shifting frequencies, which is how they say people. Like. Like there can be aliens among us, but we don't even know it. Like, maybe we're just not on the right frequency. And that sounds crazy, but you know how, like, within your own mood or your own attitude, you can kind of like shift your frequency and you can think positive and get in a better mood? Like, what if that's just like a micro way of shifting frequencies and we're just not very good at it as humans and the aliens are just super good at shifting frequencies and they can travel that way.

[A]

Now, if you had gone the idea of, like, quantum entanglement, I maybe would agree with that. But, like, have we proven that frequencies can teleport? Or even shown any sign that if you tap into a right frequency, you could suddenly vanish and be in another spot?

[B]

I'm just going to say this right now, Miles. You are on the wrong frequency. And I can tell with a question like that. Good Lord, Erica, don't worry about this guy, okay?

[D]

Okay.

[B]

You and I will find an alien out there.

[D]

Okay. I knew Miles would be pessimistic, and I appreciate that because I'm skeptical, too. I'm a very skeptical person, so you should be. Yeah, I think it's healthy to be skeptical.

[A]

I would just like to say that I try to be rational in these types of situations because it's very easy to fall in love with a narrative and a story that aliens look like Nordic people and they're hot. You know what I mean?

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

It's a great narrative and story to believe that the royal family are aliens and they have bad teeth because of it.

[B]

I added the bad teeth part for

[A]

the record, but that's how easy it is to spew up a narrative. Look at that. You just did it yourself.

[B]

Well, it's fun, man. It's fun. What are we doing here on this earth?

[D]

Might as well.

[B]

Talking about things outside of this earth. And you know what? At some level, can't we all just understand that we are dust, and unto

[A]

dust we shall return?

[B]

Ash Wednesday.

[C]

Right there.

[B]

Right there, baby. Well, Erica, it's been a real pleasure having you on the Bellied up podcast.

[D]

Oh, thank you, guys. It's been great to talk to you. You have the best podcast. You guys should be number one because you are so much fun and I'm a fee. I'm a female in my 40s. I'm probably not even your target audience, but I just love your podcast. I feel like I'm hanging out with, like, friends from college or something. It's just a nice little break in my week to get to listen to whatever you guys are talking about.

[B]

That's really sweet. Hey, can you give Miles and I a Korean lotion to put on our face to make us look more like a Nordic alien?

[A]

Yeah. What would you recommend?

[D]

I have lots.

[A]

What would you recommend?

[D]

I would recommend that you guys just get started with something. I mean, what's your current skincare routine?

[A]

I have a lotion that I've used for the last six, seven years.

[D]

Okay. And you put that on after you wash your face?

[A]

After I shower. I don't wash my face after you shower. I'm only washing my face in the shower.

[D]

Okay, so like, once a day, you wash your face in the shower, and then you put on a lotion when you get out. Okay, that's not the worst, but it could be a lot better than that. You probably need to be having an eye cream.

[A]

Are you talking to me or Charlie?

[D]

I'm talking to you, Miles.

[B]

I got dark under eyes, but you know what?

[A]

Yeah, I think that that was. Yeah, I don't know if you need to suggest that to me.

[D]

Oh, okay, then. Then don't do it.

[A]

I'm just kidding.

[B]

Under the right lighting.

[A]

Do I have bags under my eyes I need to take care of? Do I look tired?

[D]

No. I think what it is, though, is it's really important to be, like, proactive about your skincare.

[A]

Is that what you're recommending is proactive? No, no, I think.

[D]

I don't think you need that. But

[B]

if you take what ingredient?

[D]

It'll pay you back.

[B]

What ingredient do those South Koreans put in their skin stuff? Because I always hear people talking about the South Korean face stuff.

[D]

Yes, right.

[B]

Is it like, whales, Semen.

[D]

Yeah, Salmon sperm was a big one.

[A]

Does any of it actually work, or is it just all, like, alien talk?

[D]

Yeah, no, it works. It's definitely better to be taking care of your skin and putting things on it than to do nothing.

[B]

But not chemicals, because you're putting chemical on there and then you.

[D]

Right, exactly.

[B]

Yeah, but everything's a chemical.

[A]

So what lotion should I buy then if I shouldn't be buying what I got?

[D]

I don't know that yours is bad. Maybe it's good. I just think you should do a couple steps. Like. Like, just add an eye cream for now. Like, keep doing your same lotion thing, but just before bed, put a little eye cream under your eyes.

[A]

And what will the eye cream do for me?

[D]

It'll help you, like, 10 years from now when you're like, oh, crap. Why. Why do I suddenly look so old? Like, it'll.

[A]

It'll keep kind of like Charlie's done in the recent years. Because he's basically like. Like, Charlie is my preview into what my future holds.

[B]

I've aged like a president.

[D]

What's your skincare routine, Charlie?

[B]

Oh, I use some stuff. Oh, good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you kidding me? I mean, I'd look way worse if I wasn't using some stuff.

[D]

So you keep using your stuff, and Miles will just do his one lotion, and then we'll see what we see in, like, 10 years. We'll see what happens.

[B]

This is your future, Miles.

[A]

All right, well, okay, so let's derive some value for the listeners here, okay? If. Is. Is it different advice for guys and gals, or do you believe that guys and gals should be doing the same routine?

[D]

I think guys and gals should both be doing a skincare routine. Like taking care of your skin, doing at least a couple steps. You know, like a toner, a moisturizer, an eye cream. But women tend to enjoy it more, so they do more steps, but.

[A]

Right, but in a perfect world, guys would be doing the same routines as women?

[D]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

Okay, well, then let's just blanket it. If you're a guy or a gal out there, what is the three take

[D]

care of your skin.

[A]

What is the three step routine? They should be doing three step.

[D]

Okay, if it's only three, then it Needs to be cleanse, moisturizer. Eye cream.

[A]

You're big. How much are you being paid to be pushing this eye cream?

[D]

Any eye cream you want. I'm not even saying a specific brand.

[A]

All right. Jared, do you use any eye cream?

[D]

Never.

[B]

I never use lotion.

[A]

I use ice cream. Yeah, different than.

[D]

Jared doesn't even use lotion.

[B]

No, I only use it on my, like, my back, like, in the middle

[A]

of winter when it's really dry out.

[B]

How do you get it on your back? Because it's hard. It is gonna be really flexible. I'll do like, a towel. You put lotion on a towel?

[A]

It's not the best method.

[B]

That's hilarious.

[D]

Start using a moisturizer.

[B]

I will. Convince me.

[C]

I don't.

[A]

I don't know if he. I don't know if he's convinced.

[B]

Yeah, it was super quick. Which one should I buy?

[D]

There's some really good based. Is a brand that men are liking right now. B, A, S, E, D based.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

It's real simple, like, three steps, you know?

[A]

I mean, I only really started putting lotion on my face because my skin started drying out in the winter, and I would have beard dandruff going on.

[B]

I noticed that about you.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Sunscreen is good, too. Oh, do you oil your beard? Do you use, like, a beard oil in the winter?

[A]

I will.

[B]

I'll use olive oil on my beard.

[D]

Something really? That's awesome.

[B]

That's pretty. Well, that's why you're so.

[A]

That's why it's such an attractive alien.

[B]

That's true. I don't know if I gain any calories, though, when I put olive oil on my beard, like, if it's good calories. Good calories.

[A]

Yeah, it's good. It's a good kind of fat.

[B]

Yeah, it's a fatty.

[A]

It's a fatty oil.

[B]

Coconut oil.

[D]

Yeah, coconut oil is great.

[B]

Yeah, just. And it's cheap. You can get bit. You got to do the extra virgins.

[A]

I have tried putting Pam on my beard before. I spray that on and slick it in.

[D]

That's interesting.

[A]

I've never done that. All right. Well, Erica, that was some good alien talk.

[B]

Last shout out for the TikTok shop. Go ahead, Erica.

[D]

Cozy Home by Erica.

[A]

All right, get out of the goddamn pool and start making some videos. Pick up the phone and start dial.

[B]

That's the Gary V. That I wanted to see.

[A]

I don't give a. If you're. If you think that you've made it because you got a pool in your backyard. Well, Guess what? I've seen people that don't have as much money as you with a pool in their front yard. And it's above ground. What's the difference? Get out there and make some more videos.

[B]

Wow.

[D]

Oh, my God. This is what I need. Is someone yelling at me.

[B]

That's Miles M. Forget Gary V. You got Miles M. Over here. Miles.

[D]

Thank you, guys.

[B]

All right, Erica, you be good now.

[D]

You too. Thanks for taking my call.

[A]

Have a good one.

[B]

Oh, that's good.

[A]

We should start an alien podcast. And you can take the. The dreamers approach, and I'll take the pessimistic approach. Charlie. And we can just go at it for hours.

[B]

That sounds good. I'll just. I'll just say yes to whatever they say. I don't care. I don't care. I'm open.

[A]

You know, do another caller.

[B]

Sure. What's up, Matt? How you doing?

[D]

Good.

[C]

How you guys doing today?

[B]

Good. Belly on up to the bar, my guy.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Where are you guys sitting today?

[B]

Well, we're at my cabin. Yeah, we're having some beers here, some cabin beers.

[C]

Anything with those teemo tools this weekend?

[A]

Charlie's got the torch still at his cabin.

[B]

I do.

[A]

And he says. He said it's been a big hit.

[B]

Yeah. My nieces and nephews love the blowtorch.

[A]

So if you guys want to go check out that TEMU video, go to Miner Trolley's page and find the video. Something like, we bought TEMU tools so you don't have to.

[C]

There's no way that chainsaw still survived.

[A]

We're at my house. It's at my house.

[B]

Oh, so it hasn't been used because there are no trees in Fargo.

[A]

No, there's not.

[B]

Have you used it, though? No. On a bush or something?

[A]

No.

[B]

Short shrub?

[A]

Nope.

[B]

No.

[A]

I don't know what I'm gonna do with them. I think I should put them in a case on the wall.

[B]

That'd be kind of.

[A]

Kind of like a museum.

[B]

Little shadow box.

[C]

Well, you're buying so much stuff now, I don't know where you're gonna put all of it.

[A]

Dude, you're telling me. Dude. And my wife's starting to get worried about it. Stuff shows up to the door, and she's like, what the hell is this now? It's steak. There's a price there. Price to pay for being a YouTuber, and it turns out it's a lot. So if you guys could watch our videos, that would be great.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

To make it. I have a better argument with my wife. Why we need to be buying all this stuff.

[C]

Maybe you can do like a series of trying to resell all my team.

[A]

That actually is a good idea.

[B]

It's like, he is gonna do that.

[A]

I am gonna do that. Yeah. Here's all the stuff I've bought over the last year. I'm now going to try and sell it on Facebook Marketplace and then do

[B]

your over how far in the hole you are. Or maybe, you know, maybe you could upsell it.

[A]

Maybe again, can I sell anything for more?

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

I'd have Charlie Barron sign it and then it would go for more.

[B]

Damn right it would. Miles.

[A]

Damn nice to you.

[B]

It'll.

[C]

It'll.

[B]

Thank you. So, Matt. Right, Matt.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Matt, what's on your mind?

[C]

So the main thing I wanted to ask you guys, well, before I get to my question, where do you think, like, the appropriate cutoff is for people that you are, like, societally required to send a happy birthday text to? Because.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

I think it's too big right now. I think we got too many people in the web and I'm trying to cut it down.

[B]

Nobody. Nobody wants to spend their birthday. Getting back to texts that just say Happy Birthday, exclamation point.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Because then.

[C]

But then when it's their birthday, then you feel like you got to do it too. No, it's just a cycle that we can't get out of.

[B]

If you're not saying anything more than Happy Birthday, just save them time on their birthday.

[A]

You know what I just thought of? Genius idea.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Apple or Apple needs to come out with a feature where it's. You just flip it on and it's auto reply to birthday messages. You know how they sort messages by like spam and stuff. Now there needs to be a section of happy birthday messages. You don't get a notification and you can just turn it on that it automatically just sends thanks back to them and you never have to see them.

[B]

And basically what you're doing is like Facebook, when they put your birthday on. And then people would feel so overwhelmed, they would do a post the next day saying, oh, my gosh, I'm so overwhelmed. So overwhelmed with all the birthday. Because no human should have to have that many people saying Happy Birthday. We were not built to have that many people. Humans were meant to have like 20 people say happy Birthday, Max. If they had a family of 12,

[C]

you know, whoever I see that day and like, that's it. And then like, you know, my mom, my dad, and we'll cut it off there.

[B]

There you go. I like that. I like that a lot.

[A]

Yeah, I would say a media family, you probably should be saucing happy birthday messages.

[C]

Exactly. We got those guys and then, like,

[A]

I have a few close friends that I'll send happy birthday to on their birthday. But other than that, the issue is,

[C]

is we're doing them like, you know, all the aunts, all the uncles, all the cousins.

[A]

Yeah, I've never seen them all, but

[C]

the issue is, like, my mom, my dad, and my brother will send them out. So then I'm the asshole. The family. If I'm the only one not sending

[A]

it right now, when do you find out? Like, where does being an asshole show up? Do they call you out in person?

[C]

No, they don't. But I feel it, like, internally.

[A]

Who cares? You know what I mean? Like, there's so many times when, like, I'll get a message and I'll be like, I just really don't want to respond to this. I'm like. And then I weigh the options. I'm like, can I take this one off the chin? Even if they call me out in person, can I handle them being mad about it in person? And if the answer is yes, I just don't respond.

[B]

You said that happened to you.

[C]

I've got. I've got one cousin and her birthday is like, right before Christmas. So we were all together around Christmas time, and she's kind of like me. She's kind of anti birthdays too. And she noticed. She was like, oh. I realized, like, you know, your mom, your brother, your dad, they all send me a birthday text. You didn't. And I said to her face, I was like, yeah, like, can we just be done with this? Like, I don't want one on my birthday. She's like, yeah, no, we're good. So that one, I got one down out of the way.

[B]

Nice, dude. Nice. And I feel like a lot of people would be interested in this conversation. You know what? Then we could dial it down to the people who need a happy birthday text, because some people, they're not getting it.

[A]

Who does need a happy birthday text?

[B]

I don't know. Maybe someone doesn't have a lot of people saying happy Birthday. Those people, let's text them.

[C]

You know, we supposed to figure out who they are?

[B]

I don't know. That was as far as the idea got. But yeah, the point is, is we. Look, you know what? I've been told that I'm a bad communicator, okay? But I resent that. I am a. You've never been told that me Miles no, it's true. I've been told I'm a bad communicator.

[A]

Not only a bad communicator, you're also a bad communique. Basically getting information as well as giving information.

[B]

I am a.

[A]

And the greatest example that you know that you're bad at receiving information is we were on the phone call yesterday and he said when are you going to be here? I said 7:45. And then later in the conversation when you were talking about ordering pizza and I had to make sure that you knew we weren't going to be there for another hour and a half. So you didn't order the pizza by the time we got there cold and you got mad at me for saying miles you already told me that we were going to be there at 7:45. Why did you say it again? It's because I said it's a 5050 shot. And whether you remembered I said it the first time.

[B]

And the pizza was wrong.

[A]

And the pizza was wrong. Dude, this is how crazy. What is. Listen, is this Matt, is this not a psycho move? Charlie ordered a supreme pizza with meat on it and a veggie pizza and the veggie pizza was a large and the supreme pizza was a medium. Is that not a crazy move to have the meat be the smaller pizza?

[C]

Yeah, that makes no sense at all.

[B]

Yeah, because I didn't order it Matt, okay? I ordered two large pies. It wasn't my fault, OK? And by it wasn't my fault I mean like 50% chance it was my fault. But.

[A]

But you weren't paying attention.

[B]

So what? Guess what Myles? Pizza was free. Suck a toe. All right, so the big toe and so. Listen Matt, are you Catholic?

[C]

I am.

[B]

See this is it. Catholics should not be, should not have text messaging. Catholics and text messaging do not mix. We have too much Catholic guilt that we are thinking. You know what Protestants do when they don't text someone happy birthday? They never think about it. They never think about it.

[C]

So the issue is Charlie.

[A]

Yeah. The non tanamis are just like yeah, I got a text. Yeah, I don't care about it.

[B]

Yeah, they don't give a wake up.

[C]

And I just got a text from my mom already being like. And she'll text like in our family group chat and it goes out to all four of us and it's like hey it's uncle so and so's birthday. Make sure you wish him a happy birthday. So then the whole rest of the. The whole rest of the day I'm just thinking about should I Do it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Not do it. If I do it, I got to make sure I do it. Like, at least an hour apart from my brother's gonna do it because then it's gonna look like we're both doing it because we were both told and

[A]

is one of your brothers a total suck up and sends it right away.

[C]

He definitely does. But there's a couple times where, like, my mom will forget whose, like, birthday it is, and she won't text us till like, 4 or 5pm so then I'll have to, like, text my brother and be like, when are you sending out yours? Because I can't send at the same time.

[B]

What a waste of time and energy, man.

[C]

I know.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

All the. You could just send it as well. Like, instead of sitting all day worrying about it. If you just send it and you move on.

[B]

He's not capable. He's not kidding.

[C]

Because I. I don't think I should be sending it in the first place.

[A]

Don't never think about it again.

[B]

He can't. He can't because he was raised with the fear of hell in his soul. Okay, so give him a break. You know what, Matt? I'll say this. You remind me a lot of me, and I'm not a bad communicator and neither are you. We are great Communicators if it's 1993. In 1993, we were the. Like, you send us a message, you will get a reply in two to three business days, but depending on your proximity to my home.

[A]

That is true. Communication is relative.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But if you call me, I'll answer it.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'll be happier.

[A]

We can confirm that today. We did that today. Yeah.

[B]

He called in the answer. Yeah. Because you can do something else while you're on the pH. It's kind of like an interactive podcast while you putz in your garage. I'm fine with that. I'm fine with a little call. Yeah. Do you ever get someone on the phone where they're talking a little slow and you're, like, trying to, like, speed it up like a podcast, you know? Can we bump this up to 2x speed?

[A]

Do you ever talk to someone on the phone and they start going off on side tangents that don't matter at all, and you wish you could just skip that part of the podcast?

[B]

Oh, I wonder who he's talking about right now. Miles, did you see my hummingbird feeders out there?

[A]

Look at that. I did, actually. I said something to Jared about it.

[B]

No, I don't use the dyed color in there because that's not good for the hummingbird.

[A]

No.

[C]

Oh, color's not good for them.

[B]

No, no.

[C]

Ours, we got. We got the. We got the red. The red color.

[B]

Get out. Get out there and get rid of it. What are you doing, man?

[C]

I'm not.

[B]

Use your Catholic powers for good.

[A]

You put yellow five in my hummingbird fever. I want. I want the. You know, I want what happens to

[C]

the birds fall out of the sky because of the red food dye.

[B]

Well, I don't know. I'm not following a hummingbird around all day, Matt. But I've heard.

[A]

I imagine trying to following a hummingbird around all day. They move so fast, it gives them

[B]

liver problems, I think, you know, and

[C]

I'm gonna have to relay that message up top to make sure we change our hummingbird.

[B]

You want to send a text right now that matters. Send it to your mom. Tell her to dip this away. Let's get rid of it.

[C]

As soon as. As soon as I'm done with this, I'm going to send that link along with it. She's not going to believe me.

[B]

Well, tell her I said so, then she really won't believe you.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Who's that? Who are you talking to?

[B]

Yeah, Charlie, who?

[A]

Do you ever feel like there's. There's movement fatigue, Charlie, with hummingbirds, with social media, we now have so many movements that it just is exhausting that you just are like. Like, do I really need to get on. The hummingbirds don't need dye in their movement.

[B]

It's not the. Please. These are. There are things to get exhausted about. And it's not a movement. It's just like hummingbirds are sick and like cool and we don't need them.

[A]

Movement needed to alert.

[B]

It doesn't need to be a movement. Doesn't need to be a movement. Doesn't need to be a friggin movement. It's just don't put the red shit in the dye. That's it.

[A]

But where did you hear the hummingbirds

[B]

are dying thing In a birder magazine? Okay, did you want me to admit it? Huh?

[C]

So, Charlie, actually, how would I be a worse Catholic if I don't feed the hummingbirds or if I feed them with the red dye?

[A]

That's the Catholic conundrum right there, Charlie. And you're caught. You're dead to rights.

[B]

Not that cut. That's. That's false.

[A]

So we just don't feed hummingbirds anymore? Even if I have access to no hummingbird feed that doesn't have dye. In it.

[B]

It's a false choice. Hey, do I feed my child formaldehyde or just not feed them? You feed them frickin oatmeal, dude. Okay, get a pot out, put it on your stove, put sugar in there and water and mix it up into a little molasses thing or whatever the hell the recipe is. Pour that in the feeder. Frick, do I got to explain everything?

[A]

Hummingbirds can eat on their own. They don't even need the feeder. Like,

[B]

dude, it's fun to see them come up to the window and like, look at that thing.

[A]

It's like, God, danger by needing to see them with a feeder.

[B]

I'm not putting them in day. I'm helping them suckle along the way. Miles, we're making them lazy too.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

All right, well, man, you know what? I'll accept that argument.

[A]

Let's start a new movement to get rid of all of Hummingbird now.

[B]

He wants another move. Movement now.

[A]

But this is how society is. These.

[B]

You just want your movements. No, I don't.

[A]

I. That's all I'm saying. I'm. I'm pointing out the, the craziness of how many movements there are. And I'm not saying that some movements aren't good. I'm saying it's good. But there's so many that it's like, God, how do I keep up?

[B]

There is movement fatigue, I'll give you that.

[A]

Okay, thank you. You could just said that right away.

[B]

Well, you were getting going on the hummingbird.

[A]

There's so many movements.

[B]

Ah, I like a good hummingbird. I almost said I like a good hummer. I was like, don't put that in. That'll get us flagged, you know?

[A]

Oh, I don't know if that would have got us flagged. I think we'd have been fine.

[B]

Yeah, I didn't know. Do you know that that's like an old timey phrase for.

[A]

I understand what it is?

[B]

Yeah, I did. I didn't realize that till recently. I was like, that's hilarious. I never knew that. Matt, how you doing over there? Sorry, we got a little going on this end.

[C]

No, that was good.

[B]

Yeah. But anyways, text people like it's 1993. And that works great for birthdays because you already missed their birthday. You'll get them next year. And if you really want to appreciate your birthday, you give them a few days before their birthday so they know you appreciate them. And also you're not overwhelming them on their birthday because the other end of it is way more exhausting to have to tell all these people individually, thank you. Exhausting. Forget about it. It's for the birds.

[C]

Yeah. Then the big issue is, like, you find someone, like, the last four texts you have is just, happy birthday. Thank you. Happy birthday. Thank you.

[A]

I do have those.

[C]

Thank you. And there's just. It's. At some point we got to cut it off here.

[B]

Well, just start cutting it off now.

[C]

I might. But then it might could get awkward if I'm not saying them. And then I just get, like, three happy birthdays in a row.

[A]

All you have to do is evaluate if you're willing to take a confrontation off the chin. Can you take a punch in a conversation and be okay with it?

[B]

And I'll say this. You can. And from my limited boxing experience, the more punches you take, the easier they are. That take.

[A]

That's true. You know, so if you're like, I don't really want to respond, and they call you out in person, if you can stomach them calling you out and being like, yeah, I just. I didn't feel like it, sorry.

[C]

And.

[A]

And you can move on with your life and you're fine, then you don't have to send out the text messages.

[B]

And it's.

[C]

It might just, like, come to, like, a head when, like, they all realize at the same time. And then we're, like, all together for, like, Christmas or Thanksgiving, and someone's like, matthew didn't wish me a happy birthday. And the next person's like, you know what? Me too. And again, I got, like, seven people on my ass.

[A]

Can you. Could you handle getting jumped by your entire family? And if you can handle that mentally, then don't even worry about it.

[C]

I think I could.

[B]

I mean, and another thing. Are you. Is it just family you're wishing happy birthday? Are you wishing, like, friends and tangential friends Happy birthday?

[C]

I already. I do not wish my friends happy birthday.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I think that's. I think that's weird.

[B]

Okay, so it's just your family.

[C]

I live near you. Yeah, if I live. But, like, if I live near a friend, like, obviously, you know, when our birthdays are like, oh, we'll go out for drinks and yada yada, you know, And I'll, like, say it to their face, but I'm not texting them.

[B]

Yeah, well, how many people are in your family?

[C]

Immediate family. There's me plus three, and then got, like, five or six cousins that I like, half to which that are all kind of like the same age, too.

[B]

Right.

[C]

And. And, you know. You know, we're Only doing it because our parents are telling us to.

[B]

Well, I mean, you for sure are the rest of them.

[A]

I also think that the other ones are.

[C]

So I don't talk to them that often that they would know when my birthday is.

[D]

Kids.

[A]

I also think our parents are coming from a generation where communication like that mattered more. Where now we're communicating with everybody all the time, that we just don't care. And we view it as like, oh, there was no effort put into sending a text message, so why am I even doing it? But if you send someone a birthday card, that's gonna mean more, you know? Yeah.

[C]

Well, those were good, though, because the birthday cards, like, you know, someone would send the birthday card and they'd be like, from aunt, uncle, cousin, and cousin. You got like, all four done in one car.

[A]

Correct. We got to get back.

[C]

And only one person had to handle it.

[D]

It.

[B]

That's. That's actually. Let's bring that back. Yeah, let's bring that back. Because then, then, then you gotta think about it.

[A]

You know, the Christmas card approach to birthday thing. Birthdays.

[C]

I like that.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Or on the Christmas card, say, and also, happy birthday this year. Get it in early.

[A]

Yeah. Shout out to all the people having birthdays this year. This is your happy birthday.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

To the point about the friends, though. Like, I don't tell my friends when my birthday is. Like, obviously when it comes up, like, oh, yeah, today's my birthday or it's coming up on Saturday, whatnot. But then I'll get, like, texts from people and it's like, how did you know it was my birthday? Why are you.

[A]

It's either you told them they're on Facebook.

[C]

I don't have Facebook, though.

[A]

Well, then you just. You have it on Snapchat.

[C]

But who's going on Snapchat still?

[A]

I'm not.

[C]

I mean, exactly. I'm too young for Facebook, but I'm too old for Snapchat. So it's like, who is. Who's looking at.

[A]

I don't know, dude. This is like.

[C]

I don't.

[A]

This is like, just something that I can't help you with. I don't know.

[C]

Don't send me the birthday text.

[B]

I don't want it.

[A]

Oh, what is appropriate thing to send a text message about? Because me and my buddies were discussing that we only text each other if there's a reason to text in terms of like, hey, what are you doing this weekend? You want to hang out? But we don't text each other and just go like, how was your Weekend. Because it's just unnecessary. It's just unnecessary because when we do get together, then we have nothing to talk about if we're texting each other about stuff like that.

[C]

Yeah, it's fun. Like, most of my friends, I won't even text individually. Like, if I want to text my buddy, I'll, like, text in a group chat with, like, two other guys and be like, yo, how was this? Because, like, for some reason, it's just weird if I text them individually

[A]

and. How old are you?

[C]

I'm 25.

[B]

That lines up.

[A]

That lines up.

[B]

That tracks.

[C]

I don't know. A big group chat texter.

[B]

Yeah. You like an audience.

[C]

I do.

[B]

And the.

[C]

And the audience appreciates it, too, because then they don't have to ask, you know?

[A]

Well, you're get it all.

[C]

You get it all done at once.

[A]

But also. Hold on here. Okay. I don't. I'll play a little devil's advocate for you here.

[C]

I like it.

[A]

You're sitting here bitching about getting too many text messages. What if your friends are sitting there being like, matt should have just sent that to him privately. I don't need to be getting these notifications in this group message about something that they're talking about.

[C]

That's not my problem.

[B]

Well, Matt, we figured it out. You are the problem.

[C]

Well, that's what I figured.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

It's more. So how do I get everyone else to bend my way so that I'm no longer the problem?

[B]

I see now this is. This is.

[A]

You can't have both, though. You can't be Catholic and not give a about anything.

[B]

I was just gonna say, yeah, this is some retaliatory Catholicism. Thinking now you're resenting the fact that you got so much guilt that you're now making it everyone else's problem, which I do often. Right, Miles?

[A]

Yes, without a doubt.

[B]

Yeah. Which is okay. Nothing you got to confess today, but get there this week. Okay.

[C]

All right, I'll be there.

[B]

All right, Matt. Well, hey, thanks for calling in my guy.

[C]

Yeah. Appreciate it, guys.

[B]

All right, you watch for deer out there.

[C]

You too.

[B]

And get your ash to mass.

[C]

It's Monday.

[B]

All right. That mayor.

[C]

Appreciate it, guys.

[B]

Later, dude. Yeah, Miles, that's why I text you after your birthday. Like, hey, dude, I know I missed your birthday, but happy birthday.

[A]

So what's really nice is I know, like, three people that have the same birthday as you, Charlie.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So one, you're not special. Two. Two, it's actually very nice because I just have to remember, like, one day and I can. I can get three birthday with one stone.

[B]

That's nice. Do you do send us all the same text?

[A]

Yeah, I just copy Happy Birthday, Charlie. So if you ever get one that just says, hey, insert name, you know that I just forgot to put your name in there.

[C]

That's.

[B]

I was curious. There's a way through that, the Shortcuts app, where, like, if you get a text that says happy Birthday, you can

[A]

program it so your phone says, like,

[B]

thank you or something, too.

[A]

All right, well, do a. Do a video on how to do it and throw it in this episode right here. Do the tutorial.

[B]

Might be just a link, but.

[A]

Yeah, no, you do it it, Jared. All right, that would be funny if we started making Jared do tutorials of stuff that we talk about on the podcast that inserts in the podcast. That would be great. Could be a good idea.

[B]

Great. Just add so much work. Just stressing about it.

[A]

I got this tutorial we like talking about how the pyramids were building. He's got to come up with a tutorial on how the pyramids are built.

[B]

That's actually a great idea. Dude, that is a great idea. I'm up all night trying to figure it out. He just says, aliens do exist. That's a tutorial.

[A]

All right. Is that it, Jared? Well, guys, thanks for tuning in to another episode of the Bellied up podcast. Have a great week. Remember to tip your bartender and don't

[B]

forget to change your air filter, which I just did here. Okay.

[C]

Hope you guys have a good one.

[A]

Goodbye now.