Podcast Summary: “The Episode You’ve Been Asking For - Saving Noah”
Podcast Information:
- Title: Books With Your Besties
- Hosts: Emily and Ashley
- Episode: The Episode You’ve Been Asking For - Saving Noah
- Release Date: January 10, 2025
- Book Discussed: Saving Noah by Lucinda Berry
Introduction to Saving Noah
[00:01 – 01:20]
Emily and Ashley kick off the episode by introducing Saving Noah, a departure from their usual psychological thrillers as it delves into the harrowing story of a teenage boy grappling with pedophilia. They emphasize the need for trigger warnings due to the book’s sensitive content, advising listeners to be prepared for spoilers and intense discussions.
Notable Quote:
- Emily: “If at any point this gets to be too much, just pause it and walk away.” [00:16]
Overview of the Plot
[01:20 – 03:24]
The hosts provide a detailed synopsis of Saving Noah. The story centers on Noah, a 15-year-old boy who, despite being an exemplary student and athlete, confesses to his mother that he has been molesting two young girls as their swim coach. This revelation shatters his seemingly perfect life and propels the narrative into exploring his mother's struggle to handle the situation.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “Noah is coaching swimming. He’s like an all-star student and athlete... he molested two little girls regularly as their swim coach.” [01:20]
- Emily: “I think it's important to say we most of the books we talk about... and this one is very different.” [00:48]
Mother’s Denial and Struggle
[03:24 – 06:12]
Emily and Ashley delve into Noah's mother’s initial reaction—denial coupled with a desperate desire to fix her son outside the criminal justice system. They discuss how the book portrays pedophilia as an untreatable condition, contrasting it with other types of abuse that might see better outcomes with intervention.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “How did you feel about the scene when she invited the victim's parents over and just said to them, my son molested your daughters? It was so uncomfortable but well done.” [05:07]
- Emily: “I truly had maintained a sense of distance... I just was observing as an outside party.” [05:29]
Pedophilia as an Unchangeable Condition
[06:12 – 09:38]
The conversation shifts to the nature of pedophilia, drawing on research and insights from the book. They explore how pedophilia is characterized not merely by impulsive actions but by a deep-seated sexual attraction to children that is deemed unchangeable. The hosts highlight the challenges in treating such conditions and the societal implications of labeling someone as a pedophile.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “If you hear someone is a pedophile, your first instinct... but also it's a mental health condition.” [15:07]
- Emily: “The problem is the harm they perpetuate is so damaging...” [15:20]
The Sex Offender Registry and Its Implications
[09:38 – 16:41]
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to discussing the sex offender registry, sparked by the book’s content. Emily shares her expertise as a psychology and law educator, detailing the history and evolution of the registry, including pivotal cases like Jacob Wetterling and the Adam Walsh Child Protection and Safety Act. They debate the efficacy and ethical considerations of maintaining such registries, questioning why similar systems aren't in place for other crimes like domestic violence.
Notable Quotes:
- Emily: “The sex offender registry is the only type of crime that we have two penalties for... jail time and publicly noted.” [24:36]
- Ashley: “I think what you see when you look at someone now, they give you major descriptions... it really shows.” [26:10]
Real-Life Applications and Technological Solutions
[16:41 – 22:55]
The hosts discuss practical aspects of the registry, including technological measures like Snapchat’s automatic reporting of child pornography and apps like Bark that alert parents to concerning activities on their children’s devices. They reflect on personal experiences and the balance between safety and privacy, acknowledging the challenges and benefits of such technologies.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “It felt like a choice that she made out of love and compassion for her son.” [36:14]
- Emily: “Snapchat... If you send child pornography, it automatically and instantly informs law enforcement.” [46:04]
Ethical Dilemmas and End-of-Life Decisions
[30:15 – 37:44]
The conversation turns to Noah’s ultimate decision to seek death with dignity, prompted by his mother's support. Emily and Ashley explore the ethical complexities of assisted suicide, particularly in cases involving severe mental health struggles like pedophilia. They reference global perspectives, noting how countries like Canada and Belgium have expanded criteria for euthanasia to include mental health conditions.
Notable Quotes:
- Emily: “He made that point so unbelievably powerful... she realized it's something that is so damaging.” [30:15]
- Ashley: “After 17 years of therapy, he is still attracted to children... please let me die. I can't get better.” [32:10]
Emotional Reactions and Personal Reflections
[37:44 – 47:31]
Emily and Ashley share their emotional responses to the book. Emily discusses her sense of detachment as a protective mechanism, while Ashley expresses relief and empathy for the tragic circumstances. They contemplate the unimaginable position the mother was in, grappling with love for her son and the safety of her other child.
Notable Quotes:
- Emily: “I didn't cry. I was like, yeah, I'm at peace with that.” [38:18]
- Ashley: “I felt like he wanted this... have no quality of life for himself.” [38:32]
Societal Reflections and Broader Implications
[47:31 – 50:00]
The hosts reflect on the broader societal issues related to pedophilia and the prevalence of such offenders in communities. They cite studies indicating a genetic component and discuss the ongoing challenges in preventing sexual offenses. The conversation also touches on the shortcomings of mental health resources and the stigma that prevents individuals from seeking help.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “Sexual offending runs in families... there is a genetic component.” [42:24]
- Emily: “Thankfully it's probably very unlikely that anyone becomes a sex offender... the odds are very, very low.” [42:55]
Concluding Thoughts and Future Reads
[50:00 – 52:35]
As the episode wraps up, Emily and Ashley share the books they are currently reading, transitioning from the heavy topics discussed to lighter recommendations. They humorously consider collaborating on a book and encourage listeners to support their Patreon for additional content.
Notable Quotes:
- Ashley: “We talk about what to do at retreat... we wrote this creepy book about it.” [52:18]
- Emily: “Don't listen to this because you're going to want to correct most of what Emily and Ashley said.” [49:50]
Final Reflections
Emily and Ashley conclude the episode by emphasizing the complex emotions and ethical dilemmas presented in Saving Noah. They acknowledge the book’s impact on their perspectives and express gratitude for the opportunity to discuss such challenging material. The hosts leave listeners with a poignant reminder of the importance of mental health support and societal responsibility in addressing and preventing sexual offenses.
Notable Quote:
- Emily: “The world's not straightforward and decisions aren't black and white all the time...” [36:57]
Support and Extras: Listeners are encouraged to support Emily and Ashley on Patreon to access extra content, bonus episodes, and behind-the-scenes footage. The hosts tease future episodes and collaborations, maintaining engagement with their audience.
Closing Quote:
- Ashley: “Happy reading.” [52:39]
This episode of Books With Your Besties offers a deep and thoughtful exploration of Lucinda Berry’s Saving Noah, tackling difficult subjects with empathy and intellectual rigor. Emily and Ashley provide valuable insights into the psychological and legal complexities surrounding pedophilia, the sex offender registry, and the profound personal dilemmas faced by individuals and families affected by such crimes.