
Join Alex in the studio for an interview with Hunter Schafer. Hunter reveals why she is loving her current single era and how painful it was being cheated on for the first time. She discusses trying monogamy, why dating musicians is HARD, and what she’s looking for in her next relationship. Hunter also opens up about what it was like growing up as the pastor’s daughter in the South, her complicated relationship with fame, and how she wound up in Euphoria with no prior acting experience. Enjoy!
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Alex Cooper
What is up Daddy Gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper. I have two brand new exclusive channels on SiriusXM.
Hunter Schaefer
First there's Unwell Music. Fun, feel good music for the girl.
Alex Cooper
And Unwell on air. The best of Unwell and brand new live daily shows with weekly pop ins from yours truly, Daddy Gang.
Hunter Schaefer
I am so excited.
Alex Cooper
Unwell Music and Unwell on air on the SiriusXM app. Go to siriusxm.com unwell call her daddy is brought to you by Peacock Original the Traitors Keep your kilts on Daddy Gang. The Traitors season finale is almost here. The Emmy winning competition series is having a wild season on Peacock. The traitors are at each other's throats thanks to some keen intel from our boy Dylan Efron. And the faithfuls are closing in. Meanwhile, TV's best dressed host, Alan Cumming has kept his guests running with increasingly difficult missions. Will it be the traitors or the faithful who who take the cash? You don't want to miss any of the new remaining episodes of the Traders streaming only on Peacock. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by ixl. Do you want to set your child up for success? IXL Learning is an online learning program for kids that covers math, language arts, science and social studies. IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the U.S. make an impact on your child's learning. Get IXL now and call Her Daddy. Listeners can get an exclusive 20% off IXL membership when they sign up today at ixl.com call her Daddy. That's visit ixl.com call her daddy to get the most efficient learning program out there at the best price.
Hunter Schaefer
What is up, Daddy gang? It is your founding father, Alex Cooper.
Alex Cooper
With Call Her Daddy.
Hunter Schaefer
Hunter Schaefer. Welcome to Call Her Daddy.
Thank you so much.
I am so happy you're here.
Thank you. I'm so happy to be here. Like I just told you, not the. Not the vape.
Not the vape. Coming out as you're like. Thank you so much.
This is how comfortable I'm feeling right now. So. But this means the world to me. I just have to start off and say because my sister, who you have graciously led in this room, put me onto your podcast during the pandemic and we were gagging and I'm just. I'm so excited.
Alex Cooper
I love you.
Hunter Schaefer
Okay. Little do you know I really love you because I have to tell you a story.
Okay.
So I think it was a year ago. We were this close to each other and you had no Idea. Probably. We were in Milan and I was sitting.
Were you at the Prada show?
Yes.
I do remember seeing you there.
Okay. This is where you there. Okay, okay. Hunter sister is in the room. She's saying she saw me freaked out. Okay. This is why life is so fucking stupid. Because I was standing with my videographer and I was like, oh, my God, it's Hunter. And. And he was like, go say hi to her. And I was like, no, no. Like, that's weird. That's weird. He was like, no, go say hi. I'm like, no, no, no. Like, I believe one day we are going to meet in a non like, weird or like, moment where I'm like, fangirling.
That's totally how I feel about people too. Like, that I gag over. It's like, if I know that we are going to. Because you have that feeling about people sometime where you're like, I know I'm going to kick you with this person. I'm like, I don't want to fuck.
It up, but I'm so happy you're here. Call her.
Alex Cooper
Daddy is brought to you by Airbnb. Oh, I love traveling. I really do. But I will say, when I'm traveling, my anxiety comes from. I really want to stay somewhere where I feel comfortable. I do get homesick, especially when I'm away from my dogs. But I want to be somewhere where I feel like it is as homey as humanly possible. I'm a homebody, so if I'm leaving, I gotta feel good. And every single time I book an Airbnb, I look for things that I know will make me feel cozy. And Airbnb is the best way to travel. Daddy gang and where to stay. So many times when I'm with my girlfriends, we are.
Hunter Schaefer
I don't know if you guys do.
Alex Cooper
This, but we're planning a trip and at first you're like, okay, where are we going to stay?
Hunter Schaefer
And every single time we're like, we.
Alex Cooper
Want to be basically on top of each other and super close, but we also want our own rooms. And that is the beauty of Airbnb. Also, my best friend always wakes up so much earlier than me, so she can go to the kitchen and she can hang out while I'm still only a couple feet away from her. It is a dream situation with my friends. Also, when Matt and I are traveling with pets, AKA Henry and Bruce, it is very important for us if we can bring our dogs. Airbnb is very accommodating. And Airbnb is the best way to make your trip one to remember because you get to explore not only a new city, but a new space in that city. Staying like a local helps you immerse yourself wherever you are, as opposed to feeling like a tourist. You can grab groceries at the local market. You can explore the neighborhood bars and restaurants if you want to go somewhere, but you don't really know where to yet. Let Airbnb make the decision for you. Daddy Gang guest favorites might inspire you and perhaps even create a new tradition. So as you book your 2025 travel daddy gang, my number one tip is to check out Airbnb first to find the perf place to stay, because your accommodation can really make or break the trip. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Tinder. It is February, and love is in the air all month long. Don't wait around for it to fall in your lap. When you've got Tinder's first impression feature, Daddy Gang, you can now send a message before you even match someone. Whether it's calling out their taste in music or dropping a funny line they won't forget. It's low pressure and an easy way to put yourself out there. This is your month for romance, and Tinder is the perfect place to make it happen. Explore all the possibilities for yourself. Tinder. It starts with a swipe. Download Tinder today.
Hunter Schaefer
Okay, Tell me about your outfit. How did you pick this outfit? We're loving it.
Okay, thank you. You know, I. This is like. Well, we. And we were just talking about. This kind of is like, I always feel like, like, the image that I put out into the world, like, on Instagram, whatever, is, like, very much like the drag version of who I am. And it's like an image that I've put together to, like, give to the world. And. And, like, that is not how I dress and act in real life. And so. But like, this. I feel like your podcast is very about, like, cozy. Let's, like, give realness. And this is my. I pictured up off the floor and put a little stupid outfit together. And that's what it. That's what this is.
It's really cute. And I'm happy that you're comfortable. And that is the key here. Like, coziness.
Yes. And RuPaul also. Okay, can I just say, that interview, like, face cracked me. Like, that interview impacted me so much. And also, I lived for her outfit for her give with the. With the.
Oh, my God, it was so incredible because I remember, like, you're kind of talking like, similar with, like, Ru, like, presents a specific Way and has, like, cunt outfits that you're like, this is.
What I'm talking about. Yes.
And I remember when Ru showed up, I was like, oh, my gosh. And I remember the rep was like, no, Ru really wanted to show up today just as, like, Rue.
Yeah.
And this is what, like, Rue would be wearing, like, around Ruth house. And I was like, okay. Yeah. And so I love that you came just, like, cozy today. Thank you. You just bought a new house, like.
Yes.
Here.
Yes, I heard you did, too.
Yes.
Okay.
How is it going, girl? Oh, my God, girl.
Okay. So I. I've been looking for a house for a few years to be. To be 100% honest. I have, like, I didn't grow up with. It's. It's a very surreal thing to be, like, making significantly more money than, like, anywhere where I came from, like, my parents, any. With anything that I grew up with. You know, we're just pretty regular middle class. And now I'm like, I have a. I have a lot of dough, and I have no idea how to. How to use it. And so I. And it scares me. And. And so, like, at some point, I had to be like, okay, I need to do something with my money. And. And so, yeah, I've. I've been looking for a house. I finally found this beautiful house. And, yeah, I've. I moved in. When? September of last year.
Okay.
And I've started on the whole, like, now I'm going to hire people to make. I tried doing the whole. I'm going to buy furniture by myself. I have no idea what the I'm doing so hard. Are you doing that?
Oh, my God. I literally left it to my husband because, like, back in the day, your husband is.
You let your husband do it.
No, no. I know this sounds insane, Hunter, but, like, Matt has incredible taste.
Okay.
He has, like, perfect taste. Now I just let him do his thing because I'm gonna be honest. I decorated my first New York City apartment where I first lived alone for the first time ever.
Alex Cooper
And I was like, watch me.
Hunter Schaefer
Like, this is gonna be so gorgeous. I got the couch, and the couch sat there for so long, and I'm like, how do you make a space look good? And I see Pinterest, and I see, like, even Urban Outfitters. Like, it looks so cute. And then I buy it, and it looks like fucking shit.
Yes.
So then I hire someone, and now I hired my husband to do it.
So amazing. Good.
If you want, he'll come over.
I wish. I wish I had a husband that had amazing taste. That is not my fucking case, diva. I like, yeah. So I went through the exact same spiral of like, okay, wait. I like, you know, I look at couches and then I'm like, wait, but. But, like. And this is so. I hate. It's so, like, it's okay, go first world, whatever, whatever. You know, like, I look at this amazing couch, but then, like, if I spend a bunch of money on this couch and then I. But then the carpet, right. Changes everything, huh, girl? I'm. I'm like, I. I tried. I really tried. And I was like, no. So I. I hired a designer. I. Yeah, so. So have you seen Troye Sivan's ad video saying insane? So I hit Troy up and. And he was very gracious in connecting me to those people. So they're doing it for me.
God bless.
And we are just getting started. Everything in my house right now is completely covered in sawdust because the roof just got done and it all came through the ceiling. It's insane. So, you know.
Okay, well, it doesn't maybe matter because you're leaving.
No.
Can we talk about this?
So this is all going to happen while I'm away.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay, so talk to me. You walk in here and you're like, bitch, you caught me at a great time. And I'm like, wait, why, Hunter? Why? You're. Tell me.
Okay.
What is happening?
Okay, so. So yes, you have caught me for this interview. Very. It. It. I've had a fucking week. My sister knows this. I've had a fucking crazy week. So I. I got this. It wasn't necessarily an offer, but. But, you know, people, the casting people for this TV show came to me like, you know, a little over a month ago and asked if I was interested. And I initially. And this is something we'll get into, too, is. Is. I don't think, you know, I feel like I did TV and that was such a great intro to acting. But since moving into films, I realized I love the film format so much more because it's so. It just. TV is so. It's a beast. It's a beast. And so I was really, like, under the impression with myself that I was not going to do TV again after Euphoria is over. Okay, but. And so I initially, I said, no, I don't think. I can't. I mean, this sounds really cool, but I just don't think I can do it again. And then, you know, and then so they went off and they went into. They tried, you know, they tried casting people and Then they came back a little over a week ago and were like, hey, we just want to gauge your interest again. Cause we really think you could be really right for this. And so I was like, okay, I need a meeting with y'all to, like, show me really what you're trying to accomplish here. It was an amazing meeting. And I was like, fuck. I feel like the universe is, like, handing me this thing right now. It's not what I thought I was gonna give, but I feel like I have to do this. And can I say what it is? It's Blade Runner 2099. So there's the initial Blade Runner from the 80s, and there's 2049 from 2019. And so this is the continuation 2099 in TV show format. It's very cool.
Congratulations.
Thank you.
That's, like, insane.
Thank you.
And when you have meetings like that, when you say, like, it goes well. Like, what do you look for to make you feel comfortable?
Well, yeah. So, like, I. The acting thing, this all, like, I was. I was not looking to be an actor. It's not what I thought I was gonna do with my life. I still question whether it is. I've just. So this week has been this whole process of being, like, shit. I have. I am being handed these incredible opportunities on a silver fucking platter. And while it might not be why I thought I was put on this earth to do, like, this is. This is what I'm being fucking called to do right now. And so that's been like, a big processing moment. And I think it's really allowing me to head into this project and just fully, like. Like, just dive in head first and, like, give myself to it, you know?
Okay. I have so many questions of just, like, how we got here and how you are doing. So you grew up in North Carolina, and obviously that's so different than la. What is your hometown? Like? Can you describe it?
Yeah, so well, so it's.
Your sister is laughing. Why is she laughing? What's so funny?
Yeah, well, you know, so I've. I. I really. I'm gonna be honest, I. I fucking hated North Carolina. Okay. And growing up there, being queer, being queer in the South. Anybody who's queer in the south knows it's not fucking easy. It's really, culturally, it's in a completely different place than, like, the bubbles in the cities that we live in. And I always knew that I didn't belong there and that I belonged in these spaces where I can, like, be myself and, like, not feel like there's a Target on my back all the time. I really hated it. And like, I. I'm not gonna lie, like, growing. Growing up there, like, like, me up. I have now come to love it because I can return there in all my bad butchery and, like, know that I'm fierce and I don't feel like a nuisance for existing in North Carolina now. So I. I love it now. But growing up there, it was. It was tough. I did not like it. Yeah.
What were you like as a kid, like, in this environment? Describe yourself.
One of my, like, I guess afflictions with life is I have never been able to really help but be who I am. And. And, you know, so even before I transitioned, and I transitioned in my first couple of years of high school, but before I transitioned, you know, I'm just like. Can I say bad words? I mean, like, yes, yes, please. So I'm just like this little faggot. Like, I, you know, I am like an extremely high femme boy in this, you know, space of, like, you know, boys are, like, very one way, especially in the South. Like, it's just culturally what it is, and. But I mean, it's one of. I'm so thankful that I have not really been. Been given a choice to be anyone but who I am. So I always stuck out, like, a sore thumb. But I was, I loved, like, extremely artistic. Pretty happy. I've always had, like, a. Like, a pretty easy access to, like, joy, I think. So, like, despite my circumstances.
Alex Cooper
Yeah.
Hunter Schaefer
You know, I look back on my childhood and despite being in a certain amount of pain just for being who I am. Yeah, I was a pretty happy kid, you know.
That's amazing.
Yeah.
Like, if you're in the south, you're right as, like, growing up. If you are queer in the south, like, still to this day, it's crazy to say, like, kids are having a hard time. Even California, they have a hard time, which is even crazy to say. So when you're growing up in that environment. I know you have three siblings and you're the oldest.
Yes.
Being the oldest, it. Was it hard to, like, open up to your siblings, or were they, like, there for you? Like, what was that dynamic?
I would say the siblings was. Was on the easier end because I think that, I mean, like, me and. Me and Hannah, like, we. Because we're so close in age, so we were in the same schools, and. And because nobody really understood, like, what I was doing, I think, you know, we had our trials and tribulations as siblings, and we. But we. We've taught you know, we've moved far, far beyond that now. And, you know, my siblings are some of the closest people in my life now. But. But at the time, yeah, I think it was. It was a little tough for everybody because no one, not even me, understood what, like, I was going through and why I stuck out like a sore thumb and, you know, whatever.
But as happy as you were, that, like, makes me sad for any kid that's, like, going through something that's, like, indescribable in your mind at that point. Did you have a hard time in school? Like, what was your middle school like?
Middle school was probably the hardest, actually. Okay. You know, young teenage boys are. Are pretty gnarly, especially when they are confronted with, like, a. Like a kid who they just don't know what to do with. Like, with. They don't. They have no grasp of, like, queerness, whatever it is. So it's like. It's like, oh, like, look at this fat. Like, look at this gay kid. Like, they just don't know what to do with it. And so they'll be mean, you know, and. And, you know, so that was, like. That was always tough just dealing with boys who don't, of course, get it, but I found my cute little nerdy friend group and, you know, and that was, like, my first experience of, like, okay, if I find my circle, I can be myself and I'll be okay. So. So that was. That was cool. But middle school is also when I realized I was gay. Or, like, at that time, I thought I was a gay boy. So came out.
Who did you come out to first?
My friends. My friends. So, like, and that's the thing of, like, okay, I have this. This network of support where even if I had my parents and don't accept, okay, these people will. Will get me. So they were the first people I told, and then I would, you know, tell my parents, tell my family, whatever.
Your parents? So your dad was a pastor growing up?
My parents are still pastors. Yeah. So my dad is a pastor, and my mom is, you know, she's ordained to be a pastor. She works in the children ministry. Ministry in the church.
Okay, talk to me about that. Because just, like, thinking of, like, what you were going through as a young kid, being in the south and having your dad, like, a part of the. Growing up in the church, how did that work out?
It's. It's like another layer to it, all of. Of. And. And thankfully, you know, I didn't grow up in Cath Catholicism or anything, and I hear about you know, people in my community who grew up in that. And it's like, oh, girl, I'm so lucky that I got to grow up in a normal. Even though my parents are pastors and I'm very involved in the church in, in like a. On the chiller side of Christianity Presbyterian Church.
Oh my God. Because Catholicism is like in same. Like, you're gonna burn alive. Yeah, like I am.
Yeah. So there was never like this, oh, you're going to hell. But then I would see things about just Christianity in general where there are churches that like, believe you're going to hell. And. And so there were. That was this whole complex that I had to get through too. And then. But thankfully when I came out as gay to my parents, you know, I think they, I mean, I think anybody could have told you by looking at me that I was, was gay at the time. So that was easier. Then the trans thing came on later on that. That was a bit harder.
But did you feel like, not even just you as an individual, like, did you and your siblings feel like you guys had this like, expectation around you? Like, I'm thinking like TV shows and I'm like the pastor, like, I'm thinking like seventh Heaven back in the day. Like, yeah, I don't know. Like, did you guys feel like you had to like, live up to this like, like reputation almost?
I think it was there. And this is something that I definitely dealt with later on too in life of like, of like, you know. Cause there's this whole like pastor's daughter, like, trope, you know, and it gets kind of tough because obviously, like, what I do now is very like. I mean, my first job, when I had to tell my parents that I was doing a TV show, and in the first episode I'm having anal sex with a 45 year old and cutting myself in the arm, like all this stuff. And then. But my first thought is like, okay, they have to tell their congregation that their kids aren't gonna be on tv. And then their congregation who are just, you know, little old nice white Christian people from the south are gonna watch this TV show and see me getting. But. And you're like. And it's like, it's like, oh my God. I'm like, I. So like, I, to a degree, I still do like, feel bad because that's something that they still have to deal with. You know, my movie coming out next, next in, in a couple weeks, kinds of kindness, which I'm so excited about. My one scene in it, I got my titties out, girl. Like, it's. It's like, you know, and. And I have no personal problems with it, but it is something where I'm like, some people just don't. Aren't gonna get it. And, you know, that's a whole other thing.
How did your parents react when you told them? And also, like, how do you sit your parents down for that? Like, is that after the dinner table? Is it a phone call? Is it a FaceTime?
Yeah.
Is it a letter?
So I didn't tell them that I was in the process, in the audition process, because I really wasn't sure that I was gonna do it, because, once again, I didn't think acting was my calling or anything. It's not my plan. It wasn't my plan. So I didn't tell them until I had actually gotten the job, which kind of left them in a situation because it didn't really give them room to, like, give their opinions or whatever. But I think they were just, like, worried because that, you know, they don't come from this world. And sometimes I get really jealous of, like, my peers in this. In, you know, this industry that do have, like, family in it. Because, yeah, I mean, there's pros and cons, but. And for some. For a lot of reasons, I'm really happy that my family is in this completely separate world. But. But, like, the guidance part, I think that's what they were worried about, is I think they. You know, even though they didn't know a lot about it, I think they know the nature of this industry can be very intense, and they just didn't want me to get, like, fucked up by it, you know?
That's a good point. And it also sucks. Like, you're. It's so crazy to think that, like, your first fucking acting job is euphoria. Like, yeah, that is so baller.
Yeah.
But it's also, like, I get what you're saying. If you. If your family doesn't come from the industry at all, there's also this, like, natural judgment of, like, are you about to your life up? Like, oh, my God. Are you making the biggest, like, decision that is gonna, like, ruin your whole life? Exactly where, like, other people that maybe, like, are you more used to it? It's like, this is how it goes. I get the role.
I just had to tell. I had to be like. Like, there it is. I think I used the word risque, and I don't think just, like, a little. And cut to cut to them at the premiere. Like, I don't think my mom could even watch it. Like, it's. You know, it's insane. It's insane.
You're like, oh, my God. It's almost like when you watch a movie with your parents that has a sex scene when you're young, you're like. And you're pretending you're, like, going to get your ice cream at the time because it's so awkward. Meanwhile, you're like, so that's me.
Yeah.
And I can't run away from this. Oh, my God. God bless you. Honestly, like, that is strength within strength.
Nuts. It's so nuts.
I'm curious, though. When you were talking about kind of closing out that, like, chapter of middle school, obviously everyone needs a outlet of, like, I am dealing with all this shit.
Yeah.
Like, I remember reading, like, you said you journaled. I don't know if it was in middle school, but, like, what did you do to, like, feel less alone with all these thoughts?
Well, yeah, I think. And it's part of. It's just part of my nature, too. And I think part of, like, the pressure cooker that I sort of placed myself in growing up in a place where I was so unhappy with my surroundings is I really, like, devoted my free time and my life to my art. And at the time, it was visual arts, where I put all my creative energy. But I knew that that is my gift is I'm an artist. And it's still to this day, I know that that's what I was put on this earth to do, was to make stuff. But at the time, it was visual arts. And so I did everything that I could to just kind of, like, put all my energy into that. And it ended up being my first job in high school. My first job was contributing to making little watercolor comics for an online magazine. That's exactly. And so that was like, this is what's gonna get me out of here and get me to where I want to be in life. Totally. Yeah.
It's so. Even hearing you say that, it's so hard in general being a child. But at that point, it just sucks because, like, there are so many kids that get to live their life and be, like, not having to escape and get to, like, go to the fucking playground and, like, frolic around you being like. I was trying to, like, use this as an escape so I didn't have to, like, deal with, like, what the fuck was going on in reality.
Yeah.
Then you get to high school. Did you ever, like, talk to anyone that you felt, like, actually understood you?
Well, so, I mean, this is the thing is, like, when the trans thing started coming up and that. That kind of started coming up with the onset of puberty, which I was experiencing severe, like, levels of anxiety that no, like, you know, middle school or high schoolers should be going through at that time for. Especially around something that's, you know, quote unquote, inevitable. And I realized that this, like, wasn't normal. And then I turned to the Internet because I didn't even know what being trans was. I had no idea that you could. There were trans people in the world. And. And that's the kind of isolating piece of, like, growing up in the South. Nobody talks about it. There's. There's no people in my line of sight that, like, are this. And. And then. So, like, I, you know, went to the Internet, I looked on YouTube and found out, like, oh, you can. This. It isn't my destiny. It doesn't have to be my destiny to become a fucking man and grow a beer, you know, and all that stuff. And then. But then it's the whole thing of, like, okay, now that I know that this is my tea, I have to get everybody else on board because I'm still a fucking kid, you know, so that. And that was harder because I didn't know what it was. My parents didn't know what it was, and that was. That was a bit harder as far as, like, you know, there were moments of, like, when I first came out where, like, I told them, like, I'm a girl, and they were like, no, you're not. Like, like, you know. But it's not. It's not, because I think they've always known, like, deep down, but, like, they didn't. There's. There's. When you don't know, like, what it is. Like, there's no way to, like, like, real or, I don't know, contextualize that.
It's like the concept, like, when you say that, like, to actualize it.
Yeah.
Like, people have a hard time, especially because, like, you're saying, like, no one around you guys, like, you could relate to.
Yeah.
So you're coming to your parents with this information and, like, obviously some parents are fudgeing awful when it comes to this, but it sounds like your parents.
They came along, right? Yeah.
Just like, I don't understand what you mean.
Yeah. And I think they started realizing because this. When I. With the onset of puberty and everything is. Is where my first. I've dealt with mental health, you know, for a while now, and. But that's when it first started Showing up is in depression and anxiety, and my grades started up and I became, you know, kind of. I was becoming a shell of a person. And I think they could see that. And then they were like, okay, this is. This is like, we gotta figure this out, you know? Right.
And that's what's, like, so heartbreaking for houses that, like, don't accept their child. Cause it's like, what? Like, let them be who they need to be.
Alex Cooper
Because you're right.
Hunter Schaefer
Like, you're becoming a shell of a person because you're not, like, who you authentically know you need to be inside.
Yeah.
And everything is telling you one thing, and then everyone is like, no, no, no, don't do that.
Well, I think it's out of love. Like, I think it's like, you know, and I think it's like my parents first reaction was. Was like that, because, like, they love me. They want me to be okay. And I'm. I'm pitching them this insane idea that I want to. I want to chop my dick off and become a woman. Like, you know, like. Like, you know, and that's a very crude way of putting it, but, like, just sort of, like, get my point across.
Like.
Like. And. And I think no one wants anybody that they love to, like, endure a harder life than they have to, but sometimes that's. That's the fucking tea.
What I. I love about you, and, like, even sitting here, your energy is just, like, so incredible. And I think back to, like, younger, you obviously, like, going through it, but, like, what kind of, like, traits. I don't know if that's the right word, but, like, traits do you think, like, you gained through, like, having to really, like, endure a lot of, like.
Yeah.
Turning inward within yourself and, like, betting on yourself and relying on yourself.
Yeah. Being trans has been one of the great challenges of my life. And it sucks that I had to deal with it so. So young. And that I live in a world that, you know, is constantly fighting me on that. And it. And it absolutely fucked me up. And I'm still dealing with the ramifications of that today. But at the same time, I would not have it any other way because it has taught me, and it's why I'm so thankful for it. It has taught me that, like, the power of intuition and kind of, like, the proof that I have, like, a soul and, you know, and like. And that there. And that, like, all the answers are inside of me, you know, and at least for my truth and my life and whatever. And, like, that is like, Priceless. And it's something that I use as, you know, a grounding force in everything that I do in my life now, you know? So. Yeah, it's. I'm so thankful for it.
You know, first of all, like, thank you for sharing all that, because I. I know it's personal, and I really appreciate you opening up because, like, when you're saying the intuition thing within yourself, it almost, like, made me cry because I'm like, that is so real.
Yeah.
And so many people watching this are probably gonna, like, that's why I want to share this. It's incredible.
Yeah.
And, like, just sharing your experience like, that is, like, so powerful to be, like, lean the fuck into what you feel. Stop listening to what everyone else is saying. I know. It's so fucking hard.
Yeah.
But when you can start to channel that, like, we all know what's best for ourselves.
Exactly.
Even with us.
And you can even, like, you. It's so weird, like, your layers of, like, consciousness and everything, because you can totally, on surface level, be telling yourself something is right for you when in reality, deep down. And you. And you know it's there, but you won't look at it. Like, you're only looking at this thing that you're telling yourself. But deep down, you know, you. You always know.
Always know. You know, you can try to avoid it. Sometimes I feel like that's literally.
Yes. And you literally put yourself in your own psychosis of like. Of like, believing in this reality that is not actually your real. So crazy.
I also appreciate, like, as we're kind of just going through your life, I wonder, and you could. You don't need to answer, but, like, is it annoying sometimes because, like, a part of a big part of your life is, like, this. This moment that you realize, like, oh, like, I don't know if I'm, like, happy with the way that I was, like, born and I want to be this way and, like, I'm so happy with myself now. But, like, is it annoying when you're in interviews that, like, like, I talked about this before because I didn't want to be, like, I didn't want to ask you about it. That's why I was like, oh, we got to high school in your life. I know what happened in high school. Like, I would ask anyone on the show. I hope, you know, like, you can talk about it as much or not as much as you want, but, like, are you, like, can we. Well, I'm like, I'm this, like, so.
I thought about this today because I just recently had an interview come out where I, I fucking. This was the longest interview I've ever done. It was two, like four hour sessions. And so I really just was. I was hyped up on caffeine, I was yapping, I was talking about whatever I wanted to and I did. I gabbed about how frustrating it is to constantly. Because, like, in interviews for like, press things, when I'm promoting a movie or something, it's oftentimes the first thing an interviewer will, will ask about because it's what makes me unique. And they know that it'll get clicks, you know. But what's frustrating to me about that is I'm here to promote my work in a movie that has nothing to do with that. And you are just fishing for things that will get you clicks. And that's what's so frustrating to me about that. This today, when what I love about this podcast is like, is that you, like, we're talking about real shit and life and whatever. And I can't really talk about my life in full honesty without talking about it. And it is something I do believe because I didn't really. Fame is something that I'm like, I, I don't like, I didn't really. I knew what I want to do, like, with my life often involves fame to some degree. It's not something that I thoroughly enjoy, but I do feel like I have been put in this position in order to help progress, like the movement.
But do you ever feel exhausted from that? Like, it's not your fucking job to educate people.
All the time. All the time. And that's the thing I don't like talking about, like, just like educating people on like, the fact like Google is like, like, literally, that's how I learned about it. So you can, you can certainly do it too. But as far as like, my experience and also helping other young trans people who might watch this or watch some of my other work, which sometimes I do incorporate my transfers into my work, you know, that's who I'm doing it for. For, you know.
Alex Cooper
Yeah.
Hunter Schaefer
I feel like there's a difference between like, genuinely and authentically. Just like speaking about your experience and people are like, oh, like, I like what she said there versus being like, so Hunter.
Yeah.
In high school. And you're like, jesus Christ, I'm promoting the Hunger Games.
Why are you asking me about what it was like being a tranny growing up in the church? Like, what the fuck are you talking about?
Yeah, no, I, I respect that and I just wanted to hear from You. I bet it's fucking annoying. Speaking of high school.
Yeah.
Did you like, dabble with drugs and alcohol at all? Were you like, pretty clean? Like so.
And that's something that I think the, the church thing that I'm pretty thankful for is. Is I did you know I would smoke weed with my friends and I. And now I've learned to. I've come to learn I fucking hate weed. Is not for me. I cannot smoke it. And I had this really horrible experience with it, like when I was like 18, 19 or something where I like, I smoked and I literally thought I was in hell. And then I've never done it again, so I'm like, really off of it. That's the only thing that I kind of dabbled with. And then like, you know, drinking here and there.
Yeah.
But never really getting into it. That's been more of like a early 20s thing. You know, you need to be like.
In your room, like by yourself or that could be scary. Or with one friend that you trust.
Yeah.
And like ease in.
Yes. Because that's my thing with weed is. Is like. Because some people can just smoke and just like Kiki. And that is not how, like, when I have smoked weed in the past, I become non verbal. I'm on the floor and like a creature, like, that's. That's just when I have smoked. That's what. That's my tea. That's what I get terrified. And. And you can't do that around, especially people you don't know. Then you're like, psych yourself out and.
Like, Hunter, you're like, yeah.
I'm just like, no.
And also they're like, it's weed. Like, it's not that deep.
Yeah, it is that. It is that. I think weed is one of the most psychedelic drugs on. On the planet. I mean, that's a stretch. But like, it's literally, it's. It's. I think it is very psychedelic.
Okay, let's talk about euphoria.
Alex Cooper
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Hunter Schaefer
Daddy Gang.
Alex Cooper
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Hunter Schaefer
Both.
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Hunter Schaefer
Okay, let's talk about euphoria.
Okay.
I think I read somewhere, but, like, I don't know if you've ever actually, like, told the whole story, like, on a show where I can hear you.
Yeah.
Tell me the story of how you got the role and, like, how it all came to be.
I was taking gap year and modeling in New York at the time. I got scouted over Instagram. I go to model. I'm like, I want to make some money. That's not what happened, by the way. But I left modeling in debt.
But you can dream.
That's another, another story. Anyways, I'm doing, like, my model give. And, you know, right as I'm getting ready to, like, like, go to college, because that was my plan. I was going to save up money, whatever, go to college, that. Then this casting call comes about, and I see it floating around on Instagram. And then my agency tells me that they have asked me to come in. And so this happened with. There are a handful of trans girls working. There's a lot more now there's, like, a handful of trans girls working in modeling. At the time, we had all gotten asked to come in for this. For this audition. And I was really like, I don't know, because it's, like, trans and, like. And it's, you know, not written by a transfer. I'm like, I don't know. And then. But I. I go in because they really want me to, and because I'm like, okay, let me. Let's just, like, see what this is about. And I went in. And by the way, I've no acting experience. I have no idea what I'm doing. So I get in. And the great thing is that they essentially just wanted me to play myself. So I got to basically just, like, be myself with lines. And I think that whatever it was, it worked for them, you know? So I keep getting callbacks, callbacks, callbacks. Eventually, they fly me out to LA for, like, a final audition in front of all these HBO execs in this crazy room. And then I find out later that afternoon that I got the role and, you know, and I was still teetering on, like, do I. This is. Was not my plan, and this changes everything. And I have to be completely honest. Then I saw the paycheck, the. The. The per episode, and I was like, this is more money than I've ever seen in my whole entire life. I. I don't think I can say no to this. And. And frankly, at that point, I had also read more of the episodes. I really liked the show, you know, so it's. It's like, it's a combination of those things and. And I really liked the showrunner, Sam. We had had really good meetings, and I was like, okay, I feel like. And it's the same thing that keeps happening where I'm being handed this thing. I think I have to take it. And so I did.
It's so crazy that, like, you had no interest in fame and obviously, like, I'm assuming, like, once you took the show, you guys didn't know it was gonna be, like, what it was gonna be, so.
Well, I think we all knew it was something special when we were making it. We all, like, we loved the first. It was so magical. Like, we. We all loved it so much. And we. I mean, we still, like, we look back on it as. As, like, wow. Like. Like, we all got to grow up inside of this thing together. It's really special. But, yeah, I didn't. We didn't know that it was going to become what it did. Yeah.
Can you, like, take me to that moment where you're, like, realizing, like, the show's out, fame is happening, everyone knows your name.
Like, yeah, it's one of the most surreal things I've ever been through because it's. Because you're still the same person. So I'm still the same person, but then the entire world's relationship to you changes like that. And it was. I'm not gonna lie, it was really. It. It threw me for a fucking loop. And thank God we all, the cast and I came up in this together, and we were able to, like, like, lean on each other in this just, like, really surreal experience because I don't know how I could have fucking handled it if. If. If I didn't have them. And, you know, like, particularly Z, who's one of my best friends in the world to this day. And she, you know, thankfully, she had had some experience with fame already, and we were really close by the time we really, like, kind of, you know, fell in love with each other as friends in the first season, and she was able to help me through all of that, too. But it was very surreal. And I wouldn't say I had no interest in fame because I knew fame could get me the things that I wanted to do in life, and I knew that could be a tool, but it's not like I had any person, and I still don't really have any personal. Like, I don't personally gain anything from it. If anything, it's just, like, made existing in public a little harder as a socially anxious person. But, like. But it's a. It's an amazing tool to, like, get what I want and to make what I want happen.
No, it's so interesting you say that, because I. People always say, like, oh, people think they want fame and money, but if you just hand the money, then they actually don't even need the fame.
That. That part. Right? Because, like, bitch, if. If I could walk away from all of this with the money and. And not have.
Oh, right, Life would be right. And some people like it. Like, I get that. But, like, yeah, some people do.
And some people are meant for it. Some people were like, like, this is what you were supposed to do, diva.
Do you have a moment where you were, like, found Yourself, like, very overwhelmed by it all, and you, like, were shutting down.
So I remember some of the first moments of getting recognized in public, happening. Like, I think me and Barbie were at a cafe, and, you know, the first, like, four episodes or something were out, and it hadn't really started, but then. But we're just at a cafe, minding our own business, and. And then we have people start coming up to us, and it's the first time this has ever happened to me, and it's just really surreal. And then I think the moment that I really realized things were changing was I was in New York doing press, and it's one of those interviews. I forget what it's called, but it's like. It's, like, kind of public because they do the interview in this, like, corner glass.
Oh. Like the Today show vibe, where it's.
Like, today show, but, like, people can see you. People can see you from the inside. And, you know, so I walk in to do this interview, and everything's kind of normal. And then by the time I come out from doing the interview, a crowd and paparazzi have amassed. And then we get followed around, and my mom is there with me, too, and we get followed around by these paparazzi for the rest of the day. And just coming from what I come, like. And it was. I. Like, I couldn't process it. And it was. It's. It's scary because, like, getting followed and having people scream at you and stuff, it's. It. It puts you in, like. Like a fight or flight. Like, it's like. Like. Because, you know, you. You can understand on a surface level what's happening, but your body doesn't know that.
And you feel like you're in a cage because you're like, well, I can't open my car door.
Exactly.
It's kind of like I'm sad.
Yeah.
Is your mom, like, what the.
I think. I mean, my mom was great because I think she knew that I was really overwhelmed, so she was just there for me.
Alex Cooper
Yeah.
Hunter Schaefer
But I think we both, at the end of that day, had. Were just like, what the just happened. Yeah. And. And then, you know, it's kind of never been the same since.
Well, and I appreciate you sharing. Like, you're like, I'm a socially anxious person, so, like, naturally, this isn't something that I'm like, let's go. Like, how do you. In moments where your life is feeling too Hollywood, like, how do you comb back to being, like, Hunter yourself? Not Hunter Schaefer, Like, Prada, Vogue, all the things.
Yeah. And it's taken a while, but I've. I've created this dichotomy between the Hunter Schaefer that I give to the world and then, like, Hunty, who. That's what my friends call me and everything. Like. Like, those are two different people. And so, like, she. The famous hunter, is kind of like my drag. And having those be separate is so important for my fucking sanity. And it's also. I have. It's one of my greatest gifts in this life is I have wonderful, wonderful friends and family. And they're people. A lot of them have been around before I got famous, and so they know me and don't really. Can't really project my drag onto me. They know me for me, and. And so having them there is just, like, priceless. Yeah.
That's amazing that you've, like, been able to figure that out pretty quickly, because that takes some people, like, a really long time.
Was not quick, Right?
Okay, well, even though, like, you don't think it's quick, some people literally get to the point where, like, at the end of their career, they're like, I should have, like, disconnected more. And I do think, thank God you have your friends and family that are like, you're hunty. Don't forget it. Okay. We're gonna treat you like you're just Hunty and you're not Hunter Schaefer. We're not going to treat you different because.
Exactly.
That caus people to become monsters, that they're like, do this for me and do this for me. And then you're not even a real human. You're a robot.
No. You're like, yeah, it's. It's. It's psycho. And it's sad to watch because it. You. You know, we. We do watch it happen to people sometimes a lot. Yeah.
Obviously. I have to ask, is season three happening? Like, what are we doing, girl?
You know, obviously, I like. The real tea is I have no idea fucking idea what's going on. And you can ask literally all of the cast and it's. You know, it's. I mean, here's the real tea. Is that a lot has happened, but at least for me, and knowing where the rest of the cast is at and everything too. I mean, a lot has happened. We have had. And it's hard to talk about, but, you know, we've had deaths, girl. Gonna get emotional. And it's. I think everyone feels a certain sense of, oh, girl, sorry. Oh, it's okay. Anticipation for, like, if we are supposed to do this Season three of, like. Like, obviously, I'm still coming to qualms with what's happened and losing people that we really loved and we're a part of this family and everything, you know, and. And I think season. If we do go back, it's. It's. That's going to be tough. I mean, and I think there's a world in which we can channel that into making it a beautiful season three if it is supposed to happen. But I think, you know, that shit really threw everyone for a loop. So on an emotional level, and then there's, you know, all these, you know, industry, whatever political things that are. That go into whether or not this is happening. But that's emotionally, I think, where a big part of what's happening.
Alex Cooper
Yeah.
Hunter Schaefer
Too, you know, I'm so sorry.
And like, clearly, like, you were obviously so close. When you even talk about the cast. I'm just so sorry because, like, when you talk about, like, this rise, like, this is this became like your family.
Yeah.
Like, these are people that you were like, I don't know how to handle this. None of us know how to handle this. Let's all lean on each other. So, like, I can't imagine. And I'm so sorry and, like, thank you. There is no right or wrong whether you guys come back or don't. Like, it's been one of the most incredible, incredible rides and you guys have done such an incredible job. And, like, thank you for giving your life to something that has, like, really brought so many people, like, entertainment and happiness. And, like, there's a lot of themes that I think people have, like, loved that are very progressive and have just, like, helped a lot of people. So whether it comes back or not, thank you. We love you all.
Thank you.
And we support you.
Thank you. And thank you for being. Being real with me. Let me give my emotional tears and whatever because I'm still, of course, in it, girl. It's. It's crazy.
Grief is a. And it's not linear. And some days you'll see a picture in it. I know we're like a thing in the street and you're like, it'll hit.
Me on the toilet. I don't know where. It's just like, you know, it's.
You never know crazy. You never know.
Foreign.
Alex Cooper
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Hunter Schaefer
Okay.
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Hunter Schaefer
Okay, I'm going to shift our energy and we're going to play. Would you rather.
Oh, and then we're going to get into dating. Okay.
Yeah.
We're real.
Okay.
Ok.
Okay. Okay.
Okay.
Here we go. We're gonna play. Would you rather. Would you rather wear Euphoria style makeup every day for the rest of your life or never wear makeup again?
Never wear makeup again. Easy. No, no shade to Euphoria makeup. I just am a no makeup girl.
Love it. You're gorgeous. Thank you. Okay. Would you rather send a Nude to the wrong person or accidentally send a sext to your mother?
That's insane. Alex Cooper, that's such a crazy question. I would. Well, it depends on who's getting the nude. Because, like, my friends and I, like, we, we, you know, they see me naked, it's no big deal.
Maybe like, you send it to.
But what if I send it to my mom? Then that's might just be as bad as the sex. You know what I think, you know, my mom has seen me get butt fucked on television. I think she can handle an accidental sex and we can recover from that.
I love that. That's just so much about you.
What would you do?
Honestly? I guess I was gonna say the nude, but again, it depends who it's too. Because if, like, I'm looking cute, like. Yeah, like, it's like accidentally send it to an ex. I'm like, yeah, but.
Right, that's, you know. Yeah.
Not bad. But if it's to like a co.
Worker or like a producer, an executive. No, ma'am, Absolutely not.
I think my mom. Depending on the level of the sex.
Yeah.
Like, if it's like a choke on your cough situation, I'm like, mom, this.
Is such a crazy question.
I wrote it. I'm like, what is wrong with you?
I pray for both of us that we never have to deal with that too.
Yes, me too. What is your opinion on sexting?
It's like, I've tried. I've had. I've had cute moments with it. Never. It's never ideal. I would say it's exhausting. It's exhaust. It's.
For me, personally, I.
Personally, I hate texting in general. Done. I. If. If we need to. If we're gonna talk FaceTime me, you know, I'm a FaceTime girl. So the texting.
Have you ever reused a nude?
Absolutely.
The best, absolutely perfect use of your time. You're like, oh, let me go into the storage closet. Yeah, let me pick out which one I'm loving today.
Go to library. Pick it out. Yeah, get that out there.
Okay. Here we go.
Yeah.
Drunkenly hook up with a friend who, you know, has feelings for you and you don't have feelings back or you have to get back with your most recent ex for a month.
So. Okay. Actually, you know what? No. Like, I. So my friendships, especially a lot of my. I come from a lot of lesbians in my circle, and I don't know how many lesbians you've talked to, but most of everybody has already had sex with each other and probably will Again. And that is very much the case for me and my like, like, lesbian friends friend group. So that would probably be no problem if that happens.
Have you ever hooked up with a friend and regretted it?
I don't know. I don't really regret too much. Okay. No. I mean, there's. I've definitely, like, drunkenly done things where I'm like, oh, girl. Like that. Like. Like that didn't need to happen, but it's not. No. No shade. No. No nothing.
Okay.
Okay.
Fair.
Yeah.
What is going on in your dating life? Are we single right now? Are we dating?
No, we are. I am single as.
Okay. Are you loving it?
I am loving it. So. Yeah, so. So, I mean, you know, like, I think it is perfect for what I. Where I'm at in life right now, because especially given this past week's stuff where I am about to undertake this enormous project. And the last time I did it, you know, I was in my first relationship when I first started Euphoria, and I didn't know going into it how much of me it takes. And I really live in that world when I'm doing it. And. And, you know, like, that relationship didn't end up working out because I just had no capacity to, like, do a relationship. So I think it is so perfect that I am single as a Pringle right now because I get to just dive into your head first. Into this.
But.
But yeah, my last relationship was like. Like how long. It's where we've. We hit the year mark a little bit ago since we broke up. So. Yeah.
Do you prefer someone in the industry or not in the industry?
It's not really a. I mean, this is. It's still tough and I still, like, don't totally know, but, you know. Cause I've done both. And they both are really nice for their own reasons because obviously. And I have this with my friendships too, where, like, I. My job and my life that I live requires me to be on standby all the time. I found out that I'm spending the rest of the year in Europe, like, not even a week ago. And. And. And, you know, it's like. It's hard to maintain relationships. And so the people that have stuck around in my life know that I. I operate on this level where, like, you know, and it's all like, my best friendships are like this, where, like, we can go a month or however long and not talk. And then when I. When I come back, or when they come back, we can pick right back up where we left off. That's how I operate in my relationships. I, like, it's just how it is right now. And. And so, yeah, like, with the relationships, too. It's. It's like. It's. It's nice dating other people in the industry because they also work like that.
Right. So they get it. Like, they're like. They're not going to be annoyed that you're, like, leaving for a certain amount of time.
Because I've had friendships end because they're just like, girl, like, like, what's going. Where are you? Yeah, Like, I have work. Yes.
Yeah. Okay. What is the best first date you've ever been on?
Best first date I've ever. And I. So the date, like, dates is, like, not. I'm just now getting into, like, the era of my life where, like, I'm an adult and I feel like more like the idea of someone asking me on a date or me asking someone on a date. Like, a first date where you go to dinner and you, like, get to know each other. Like, I haven't done a whole lot. Like, a lot of, like, my previous stuff is like. Like, we start out as friends or random hookup, and then it turns into whatever it is. But I would, like. I would like the dating thing. It sounds fun.
Okay.
Did you go on a first date with your husband?
I did. It was, like, the best first date I ever had, which is annoying because I hate that. Like, I feel like some dates could be great first dates, and then they, like, turn out to be fucking shit. It turns out that he wasn't a dick. He actually was a lovely guy, and I ended up marrying him. Him. But I've had good first dates, but I've had awful first dates before. I also think, like, it is more normal sometimes to just, like, go from friends, and then all of a sudden you're just, like, hanging out at your house, your apartment, and, like, that's fine, too.
Yeah.
Have you ever had it where, like, after a first hookup, you're like, oh, my God, the chemistry was so insane. Like, I must see this person again. Yeah. So you've had that before.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Yeah. And that's. That tends to be those, like, like, what will turn into a relationship. Yeah.
Okay.
Alex Cooper
Who is currently your celebrity crush?
Hunter Schaefer
Oh, God. Oh, God. Let's see. Who is not offensive to say that.
You want to run into next week?
Oh, no. Let's see. Alex. I don't know. I can't, like, vape stuff. Actor. I'm trying to think Musician. No. Well, I have a type. Okay. Oh, what's your musicians? I. I love a musician. I've dated a couple now.
I think I've seen that. Yeah, I think I've seen that.
I've dated a few now. I love a musician.
One with, like, long hair, one with, like, short hair.
You know, it's like the little sucker in me that's just like, oh, my God, you are so charismatic. And you will play the guitar, whatever. And I'm like, Goo Goo Gaga.
Has anyone ever written you a song?
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, And. And trust me, they know what they're doing too. They know what they're doing with that and. But it. It works. Diva. Oh, my God.
Like, on the guitar, just, like, sitting on the bed, you know?
Yeah. Or. Or, like, you know, send it to you and, you know, like, you know. Yeah, it's. It. It works. I have fear for anyone who. Who has this happened to them because you're. You're done. You're gone.
You're done.
Yeah.
If you meet another musician, do you think you're gonna be like, I have to break the curse and the pattern, or are you gonna go back? Are you talking to any musicians right now? Like, if you find a musician that you like again.
Yeah.
Are you gonna just go right back in?
Oh, girl. I mean, no. So, like, the thing that's tough with musicians, or at least in. In, like, my line or like, with successful musicians who are, like, doing tours and stuff, is. Is. Is, like, it's. I mean, and it's. I guess it's the same thing with actors where they have to go off for however many months and tour and. And then I'm working for how. It's like, it's very hard. So I don't know if that is, like, in my path again. Cause I've done it and I've tried it and really tried to make it work, and it's just very hard. And I don't have. At least at this point in my life, I don't have the capacity to, like, figure out how that works. Maybe someday, though. We'll see.
Do you like how I, like, let you off the hook? I'm like, okay, you don't have to answer.
I'm like, I really wanted to give an answer. You'll tell me after.
Like, you'll tell me after.
Yeah.
Do you fall in love easily?
So I like, falling in love is, like, so, like. It's. So I'm still, like, figuring out, like, what it means because I've been in love with. With people who are, like, still some of my Best friends to this day. And we were definitely in love at that point. But it's changed in its nature. And I still love the shit out of this person. But it's not that infatuation thing. So I feel there's a part of me that's like, is being in love just a deep infatuation? And then like. Like, that sort of subsides, and then it just becomes like, you just love this person. I don't know. It's sort of funny. But I also. I know what being in love, it's like a whole body, like, you know.
Right. But I think that makes sense. I think you're, like, at that point in your life where you're, like, experiencing these relationships.
Been through it enough now.
Yes. But, like, you may find someone at some point that you're like, oh, yeah, wait, that is. Is different than infatuation.
Right, Right.
That's when you'll know, is when you're like, oh, wait.
Yeah.
Because love for me when I was younger, like, it really. I went through a point where it was just infatuation. Then I was like, is this love or is this infatuation? And then I think when I met Matt, I was like, oh, this is, like, different.
Yeah. With my past relationships, I've been like, if we were in love. In love. Like, I know what that is. Yeah. And it's confusing. You know what I'm saying?
Well, because it feels different with every partner also.
And I also don't believe in, like, one true love necessary.
No, I completely agree. How do you handle when people, like, public opinion on your, like, romantic relationships?
That is something that I have learned is. So my last relationship was my first public relationship. I don't know if I'll ever do it again. At some point when you're doing it, it gets just too hard to, like. I mean, you can try to hide, but, like, whatever. But I'm also. I've also come to this point just with fame in general, where, like, people are gonna say what they're gonna say, and I really don't give a shit. Cause, like, you know, I get called a man hundreds of times on the Internet every single day. It's like. It's like, I'm so used to, like, the just fucking idiots just, like, saying, shut the bullshit all the time. So, like, it's, you know, on one hand it's like, I don't care. And then on another hand, it's like, if you don't, like, obviously a relationship is. Is, like, personal and private. And, like, you should not be. You need to eliminate as many factors that are gonna make it more complicated than it needs to be, if you can. So I don't know. I'm. It's something. When I start dating again or something, I'll.
Well, I think it's interesting too. Like, you said, like, this was your first, like. Like, public relationship. And I think there's pros and cons where you're like, finally, we can just, like, be.
Yeah.
And, like, we can go into an event together, like, as we would want to naturally do. But then you're like, people are taking pictures and then people are staring.
Yes.
And then when you break up, someone like me is asking you about it, and you're like, alex, don't ask.
Well, no, I'm excited to be talking about love and everything. Like, it's not like. It's not like, things that I don't want to talk about necessarily. Like, I've. I've learned a lot. And something that I really love about all my relationships is that I, like, you know, even if, like, bad has happened in them or whatever, or they have, like, me up to some degree or something that they have. All I have. I feel like all of my relationships, I've come out knowing that it taught me something about myself and about people. And that's, like. I feel really thankful for that, you know?
Absolutely. I feel like that's, like, the best takeaway from any relationship, anything in life, even if it's not romantic. It's a friendship. It's a work relationship. I was. When I was researching you, I was reading something where, like, your former cohort, co star slash relationship.
Yeah.
He kind of, like, talked about, like, his need for, like, to get out of, like, his codependent tendencies. Yes. I'm sure you read this.
Yeah.
Were you on the same page? Like, is a breakup, like, where you're, like, blindsided or, like, were you okay?
Yeah. So. So, like, he. He said that and. But that. That. That breakup was. It was like a mutually. Like, it was a mutually agreed upon. And it was. It's one of the cleaner breaks of breakups I've had of, like. We both recognize that this is not working, and we can't do this. We gotta go our own separate ways. And it was so, so hard. Cause we really. We really loved each other, you know, and he's. He's a really special person, and I love his soul and everything. And it by no means was that really. That was. It was messy, you know, But. But. But it was a clean. It was a Clean parting. And, and he has a lot to work on. And I also have a lot to work on. Like, and, and like. And so I think that's also why I'm in this, like, era of, like, I'm gonna. I gotta figure my shit out, because that was. We had a really good thing and. But there, there were things in our own selves that had nothing to do with each other that kept coming up in the way of the relationship, you know, so 100%.
What are you like, in a relationship?
I think it's different for every one. Like, it's really different with every kind of person too, because I've been. I used to exclusively date not men. And. And this, this last relationship was my first relationship with a man, a CIS man, you know, and, and so in. And it's, it's different. It's very different than that. Like, dating. I've dated trans women. I've dated trans men. I've dated CIS women and, and all, you know, I've kind of been around the buck and it changes it. Like, the transness is really interesting because everyone interacts with it differently. Everyone has their own, like, you know, like, like way of approaching it, and I have my own way of approaching that relationship with that kind of person. It's, it's, it's interesting. It's a switch. Yeah, no, I'm, I'm excited to, like, talk about it.
Yeah. This is interesting.
Yeah. So I'm so thankful for my first relationship. And I've talked about this before too. It was with a trans woman. And, and it was my entrance into sex, romance, all of that stuff. All, all of those were firsts in that relationship, and it was with another trans woman. Thank God. Thank God. And I'm so thank. And we're still friends to this day too, that, you know, she kind of, like, showed me the ropes because, you know, dating as a trans person is. It's comp. It's complicated. Let me tell you. It's. It's. It's not easy. And to know in my first relationship and in my first, like, really being in this mutual love thing, you know, first time having sex that I got to do it with somebody who completely understands my gender.
Alex Cooper
It's incredible.
Hunter Schaefer
And sexual. Oh, I'm so thankful for it. And, and that's. And so I'm really thankful that I started out with other trans people because there's, there's sort of being trans or having trans people in your life. There's a lens that you sort of acquire and, and it's something that like ignorant people who have no idea how to, how to like engage with trans people or think about trans people. They don't have the lens that allows them to, you see whatever person as the gender that they are presenting as or whatever. And this is a lens that you acquire as you like, you know, spend more time with trans people and everything. And so like knowing that that lens is there with whoever I was with. Amazing, amazing. And then it's interesting branching out from there into like CIS people, CIS women or CIS men where I'm not sure that they have the lens even with hookups or whatever. This is a constant anxiety I've had with hooking up with like CIS women or something is that I'm worried especially also because I'm pre op that maybe are they seeing something in me that I, that is not part of what I give or something and they might want. And I've had hookups before with like CIS women where they wanted me to like fuck them or something, like a, like a guy and it's because I have a dick and like that's like. And then like that coming up in a hookup and being like, oh God, like it's tough. But then you will find CIS people who do know and just get it. And that's what was so amazing about my ex boyfriend was from the get go, never, never a fucking. He saw me exactly for who I was, which is amazing.
It's amazing too. I appreciate you describing this too because.
Like, it's kind of hard to.
No, but like I'm, I'm keeping up with you because what I, first of all, I'm so happy for you and I know everyone doesn't have that experience is like the fact that you were with someone you felt so safe with and you were like, oh, you get me because we're similar.
So it's, it's a privilege to come across people in romance and sex and dating where that lens is there.
If someone understandably is like, I don't know, like what you want and they come to you like vulnerable of like, I really like you. Like, are you open to like that's.
Such a turn on.
Oh my God, like, tell me what you want.
They are coming because you know, it puts their intention on the table of oh, I like you, I do want to do this with you. I'm just, I'm just a little inexperienced here. Love that, love that. Amazing. It's, it's when they don't. And they don't know what they want or they want Something they're like, I am not capable of giving, then it's like sticky and gross.
So your first relationship with a guy, like, just like a guy.
That was also my first monogamous relationship. Everything else had been polyamorous because that's what I came up in. That's how I learned relationships and I kind of touched on it before I've. I had like, I had built up a complex against men.
Alex Cooper
Understandable.
Hunter Schaefer
And so, like, because most if not all of my deeply painful experiences I've had in life have been with men. And so I really like, came into this complex of I never want to let a man that close to me in my life. I don't see a world in which it's possible really. I was kind of like, it was, you know, my bare. I put up walls and kind of had been the dying. Denying the fact that I am attracted to men and I do want to date and whatever men and that that's okay and I need to let my walls down. And so that's what was so amazing about my last relationship too is also, and that's kind of what was cool about the public aspect is this is a straight guy who is in the music scene too. And, and, and, and we are in a public relationship. He's dating a trans woman and he's, he's completely straight. He's only dated CIS woman before and he's toting me around, happy to be my boyfriend in, in front of the world. And people are saying horrible, nasty shit because, because it's like, oh, you know, oh, you're so. He's gay. Dah, dah, dah, dah dah. He didn't care at all. And that was something that really showed me too, where I'm like, okay, you really. Yeah, you see me for, you know, and you love me for that.
Did you guys have conversations before going out in public together? Like, were you anxious at all?
I was anxious, but I was also just head over heels in love and happy to be doing it. And, and you know, conversations absolutely should have been happening. But also I was like 22, 23. And you know, I was just like, oh, I'm in love. This person is. This is so much fun, you know, whatever. So it should have been a thing, but it wasn't.
But I think also just to, and.
Listen, like, I've said all these amazing things with him. He was not perfect. And it's no secret, it's out there in the world, you know, and it's part of why the relationship ended is I got cheated on for the first time. And he's talked about this too. Like in his song, he writes about it. So it's fine to be talking about it today. And it's part of my truth. But that fundamentally changed me as a person. And it was this whole process of realizing that cheating has nothing to do with you at all. Oh my God. And it has everything to do with, with that person and whatever kind of pain they're in or whatever they're dealing with. It's. It's all that.
But it's so hard, I was would say. Cuz in the moment it feels like it's all you. You're like, what did I do wrong? And then eventually, I love that you're obviously like a year out. You're clearly at that place where you're like, I can. You know that. And you're saying it with confidence, but in the moment you're literally like, oh yeah.
And. And then as a trans woman, also with a man who has never dated that before, then it's your. My mind, you know, And I knew it wasn't the truth. And we both know that. I have no doubt.
Alex Cooper
But you can't help but your brain.
Hunter Schaefer
Goes, but my brain, because of the way I've been socialized as a trans woman. Like, and it's been this like, crux in my life of like why life has been so hard. Sometimes I'm like, oh my God. Like, is this it? Like, am I. Can I just not like, like, you know, but so it's cuckoo bananas.
How did you find out?
So I, I kind of knew, you know. You always, you always kind of knew?
The gut.
Yeah, the gut. And because I kind of knew, I went into the phone, you know. Yeah.
Alex Cooper
Hunter, welcome.
Hunter Schaefer
To which I am not, I'm not proud of.
I'm not proud of either. I've done it before. But the amount of people that have sat here and been like, it's, it's normal. Because when your intuition is like, like hitting you in the face, you're like, okay, fine, I'll look.
Yeah.
And the reason you're looking is because you kind of know something.
Yeah. And this stuff, it makes me so nervous to talk about this stuff because I really, I have no interest in letting the public into what happened and everything. I absolutely, I want to make this very clear. I have absolutely no fucking desire to like, like. Because what happened with that was between me and him. And, and I want to keep it and I want, I want to protect that. But, but at the same time, I'm also like, I'm here to talk about my truth and whatever, you know, and.
He wrote a song and, like. Yes. And I agree with you. I also think, like, I wish people knew. Sometimes, like, you. Some things, like, are super deep in the moment, and then when you're having a conversation, like, there's no ill will. You've literally said, like, you were in love with this person.
It was.
It ended amicably. Like, it's okay.
And he's. And he's the same way about it, because he's. He's the same kind of way, like, where I don't think he has any interest in letting the public in either. But. But we both are yappers at the end of the day, and we're going to talk about, like, it's hard doing, like, the, like. Yeah, I'm putting on the face here. Like, yeah.
You know, getting over a breakup. Like, not even specific specifically talking about him anymore, but, like, for you and what you were kind of saying, which I think is, like, a lot for your confidence of, like, as a trans woman, you're like, like, am I not? And you almost, like, stopped your sentence. Like, am I not? Like, what came up for you when that happened?
Like, am I not it. Yeah, I mean, it, like, really. I mean, like, I said it. It, like, fundamentally changed me, and it's still something that I am working through, but.
Fundamentally changed you? What do you mean?
Just in that I don't think I understood because I had never been in a monogamous relationship before, so I really. My understanding of relationships and love and everything really was rooted in, like, polyamory and queerness and sort of the way that that world works, which is very open. And I don't. I think I honestly, I kind of looked at people in monogamy and be like, oh, like, you're. You're cheating on yourself. Blah, blah, blah. Which is. Which is also what RuPaul said in that interview. And you were like, no, I literally was, like, ruined. I just got married. Play off. Yeah, I know. And she was like, sorry, bitch.
It was literally looked at me and just like. Was like, sorry. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. And you know what? I. So I don't know where I totally land on it now, because I've done both and, you know, and I think there's validity in both, and it's really a choice, and it comes down to each individual thing. But coming from that as my background and the way I learned love, I really looked at monogamy as, like, a Like, you're shorting yourself and whatever. And then I got into a monogamous relationship. Oh, bitch. I. I get it. I get it. Like, yes, I know. Oh. Oh, I loved it. Oh, my gosh. But then it opens up the door for that kind of betrayal, which is a different world of pain.
Were you open to the concept of monogamy? Like, did he initiate or did you initiate or you both did.
Oh, no, I. I was open to because, you know, I'm coming. That's what I'm coming from. So I. You know, I even, like, at the beginning, you know, I. Like, we talked about it, but, you know, that's not. That's not what we, either of us, I don't think, really wanted with. With that and. And, yeah. And, you know, I think. I mean. Yeah. Yeah.
Are you open to monogamy ever again?
Yeah, absolutely. I really feel like, you know, I've given up. I've done both now, and. And, like, I. I know I can be in either of those positions, but I really liked monogamy.
Powerful.
It's really cool. In a heartbroken way.
You're like, fuck, I hate this.
Back to poly. Fuck you. No, but, like, now I see the fault in. Because poly is so much work. It's so much work. It's so. Monogamy is so easy because it's just like. It's very simple. It's just like. I mean, you have to communicate a lot in either way. But with polyamory, you bring other people into that and other people's relationships and whatever, and it's fine. But then you have to communicate not only about your own relationship, but about if. If that's in the contract for you, about the other relationships that are happening and how that weighs. And how to. To balance that with the person's. Your primary partner's feelings. All that. It's, like, so much work.
Yeah, it's so much working. Like, you're busy.
I'm. I'm too busy right now. Which is what. You know what I said. Polyamory. I'm too busy right now.
Okay, let's talk about the new movie that's coming out by the time this episode comes out. Cuckoo.
Yeah, right. That's what I'm. That's why you're here. That's why I'm here to promote my movie.
I'm like, oh, my God. Okay, like, monogamy.
Like, but this is.
Call her daddy. And the reason I love having these conversations, though, is like, I get it. We can do, like, a press junket of like, no one, no one wants to know more than anything about you. And then we want to go see the movie because of you. And we fell.
That's why I want to do this, because I fuck. I fudge with this.
I'm so happy you're here. Thank you. A horror movie. Yes. Your first lead role.
So this is my first. This is the first movie I ever got. It's not the first movie that has come out, but. Right. It's the first movie I ever filmed and it's my first lead role and.
Are you so excited?
I'm so. I love this movie. And it really feels like a baby. Like. Like. And it was my first, you know, first movie.
Okay. Horror. I'm such a little. When it comes to horror, I'm literally like, yeah, what's happening? Yeah, happening. Like, how did you decide on this genre? Like, did you love.
Well, I love horror.
Okay.
I grew up loving horror, and I also think it's. It's so fun stylistically, particularly with this director too. It was less about the genre and even the script and the story. I. I just. I watched this director's. Who's Tumen Singer, his first film, and it's his only other piece of work. I think that's like, out in the world that you can, like, go buy on Amazon and watch. But it's called Luz, and I saw Luz and I was like, oh, my God, I have to work with this person on whatever capacity. And. And in that audition process, I. I, like, I fought for that role and I got it. And that's amazing. Yeah. And I. I love this movie.
I know this is probably, like a dumb question to ask, but, like, the process of filming, like, a horror film like me, do you ever get, like, scared? Like, I'm like.
I'm literally like, do you ever.
It's not like that, though, I'm assuming.
Yeah, no, like, Like. Well, no, because there were some scary parts because we were filming in the Bitch. In an abandoned.
No.
Yeah, here we go. An abandoned, like, 20 acre, post World War II military village, like, module that had been abandoned for 50 years. Years. We're shooting at night in these abandoned buildings that have just been sitting there for years. That was scary. But thankfully, at the casting crew and every. Oh, such a big family. I loved making this movie with them. And so, you know, we were. It was so familial, you know, it was only like when you're like, oh, you have to go walk to your trailer alone, and you're like, in the woods in the middle of Germany. And it's like, what the. It's kind of scary. But otherwise. No, I mean, I'm, you know, like, in the scenes where I'm scared, you know, I have to be scared, obviously.
But I'm just coming from the perspective where, like, I'm trying to think of, like, a movie that you'd be like, why are you scared about that? Like, honestly, some scenes in, like, Vampire Diary scared me.
You know what I mean? I still haven't seen Vampire.
No, it was great. But, like, okay, let me like Halloween Town. Did you ever watch the movie? No.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I was scared.
The Destiny movie. Yeah, that was. No, no, no, that's. That was scary. I remember that. Yeah. Yeah, I remember.
I'm literally so afraid of, like. Or, like, on Disney shows. If it was like, the, like, Halloween episode, I'd be like, oh, yeah.
No, those were scary. They were twitches. Did you.
Twitches.
Twitches and the dark cloud. That literally. Oh, my God. You remember that? Yeah, girl. So good. Yeah, so good.
Honestly, like, a little pathetic, but I'm so excited for you because obviously, you being, like, having this lead role, like, it's crazy to. This is why I love talking to you, because you started this interview being like, I didn't even know if I wanted to be a fucking actress. And I, like, get this call and I'm, like, making no money from modeling, and I get that call and I'm like, I guess I'll do it now. Your life has changed. How has your approach since now you're, like, getting on a plane tomorrow, right, to go to Europe. Like, how has your approach changed, though, to, like. Yeah, being an actress.
Yeah. So I, you know, because I was fight. I was like, you know, I was really under the belief for, like, a few years into it that, like, okay, I'm just doing this for right now, and it's helping, yeah, my career, whatever. I'm making money. This is great. But I don't know if I, like, if this is what I'm supposed to do. And now I'm in this place where I've. I've. Because I've been doing it and I get it now because also, you have to. You have to know, like, I'm learning how to act on the spot with the first two seasons of Euphoria and.
Everything, like, so fucking good.
Thank you.
You wouldn't even know.
Thank you. But, like, I'm. I'm learning. I, like, I didn't. The craft. I had no idea what I was doing. And I finally, in that process, and in this process of, like, just, like, take, like, letting this career happen to me, I've fallen in love with the craft. And now I'm at this place where I'm like, okay, maybe this isn't what I thought that I was put on this art to do, but this is just another form. I get to put all my creative energy that I used to put into my journals and in my art and everything into this. And I understand how that works now, and I've fallen in love with it. So now it's at this great point where I'm like, okay, this. This is. This is one of my superpowers. This is what I can do. And. And I love it.
Hunter. I'm going to be honest, it. This was, like, one of my favorite interviews. No, seriously, like, sitting across from you, I'm, like, inspired. And also, like, this is why I love what I do, because I've watched you, I see your social media, but, like, sitting with you for an hour and whatever, like, you're awesome. Thank you. And like, this, it's just so cool because actresses, we don't get to see, and even musicians, like, we don't get to see as much obviously, of your personality when you're, like, playing these characters.
Putting our drag in the world.
Exactly. But today, you coming here, like, stripped down, like, being yourself and, like, opening up. I'm like, thank you so much and.
Thank you for giving me the. It's. It's. I. I'm nervous about, like, you know, showing the world, like, you know, my real te. You know, I'm. That scares me. But. But to do it with you. Thank you for making the space and everything and. And like, just being here and kiking with me, that's what this felt like.
You're amazing. I literally could keep going, but, like, I know we have to stop, but I love you. Thank you.
Thank you. I love you too. This was great.
Alex Cooper
Hi, Daddy gang. It is your father. I am so excited that Caller Daddy has officially joined the Sirius XM family. I cannot wait to talk to new guests and continue to share my crazy personal stories and experiences with you every single week. If you want to hear new episodes ad free, subscribe to SirusXM podcasts on Apple podcast to start your free trial today.
Hunter Schaefer
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Call Her Daddy Podcast Summary
Episode Title: Hunter Schafer: Polyamory, Cheating & Fame (FBF)
Host: Alex Cooper
Guest: Hunter Schafer
Release Date: February 28, 2025
Introduction
In this emotionally charged and insightful episode of Call Her Daddy, host Alex Cooper sits down with actress and model Hunter Schafer to delve deep into Hunter's personal journey. From her upbringing in North Carolina to navigating fame, polyamory, and the complexities of romantic relationships, Hunter opens up about her experiences and the lessons she's learned along the way. This conversation is a raw and honest exploration of identity, love, and self-discovery, offering listeners a comprehensive look into Hunter's life beyond the screen.
1. Early Life and Family Background
Hunter Schafer begins by sharing her tumultuous upbringing in North Carolina, a place she initially despised. Growing up as a queer individual in the South, Hunter faced significant challenges and cultural barriers.
[15:08] Hunter Schafer:
"I really hated North Carolina. Being queer in the South is not easy. It's culturally a completely different place than the cities where I can be myself without feeling like there's a Target on my back all the time."
Hunter's parents are both pastors, adding another layer of complexity to her journey of self-acceptance. Despite the supportive sibling relationships that developed over time, Hunter often felt isolated and misunderstood during her formative years.
[19:11] Hunter Schafer:
"My dad is a pastor, and my mom works in children's ministry. Growing up in that environment added another layer of complexity to being queer."
Hunter's early realization of her sexuality and gender identity led her to seek solace in art and creative expression, helping her cope with the internal and external struggles she faced.
2. Coming Out and Transitioning
Transitioning during high school marked a pivotal moment in Hunter's life. She recounts the anxiety and confusion that accompanied her decision, especially within the conservative setting of her hometown.
[16:47] Hunter Schafer:
"Middle school was probably the hardest. Young teenage boys can be pretty gnarly, especially when confronted with someone they don't understand. But I found my cute little nerdy friend group, and that was my first experience of being myself and feeling okay."
Hunter emphasizes the importance of finding a supportive friend group during this time, which provided her with the strength to embrace her true self despite the lack of understanding from those around her.
3. Navigating Fame and Acting Career
Hunter transitioned from modeling to acting, landing a role in the critically acclaimed series Euphoria. She candidly discusses the unexpected nature of her acting career and the profound impact fame has had on her life.
[40:44] Hunter Schafer:
"I had no acting experience. They just wanted me to play myself with lines, and it worked for them. I keep getting callbacks and eventually got the role in Blade Runner 2099."
The sudden rise to fame brought both opportunities and challenges. Hunter describes her first experiences with public recognition, which left her feeling overwhelmed and anxious.
[47:10] Hunter Schafer:
"When I walked out of that interview, I was followed by paparazzi for the rest of the day. It was terrifying because my body didn't know what was happening, even though my mind understood."
Despite the initial shock, Hunter adapted by creating a clear distinction between her public persona and her private self, ensuring her mental well-being amidst the pressures of fame.
[48:46] Hunter Schafer:
"I've created this dichotomy between Hunter Schafer that I present to the world and Hunty, who my friends call me. Having them know me for who I am has been priceless."
4. Relationships: Polyamory vs. Monogamy
A significant portion of the conversation revolves around Hunter's experiences with different relationship structures. She opens up about her journey from polyamory to monogamy and the personal growth that accompanied these shifts.
[72:03] Hunter Schafer:
"I've done both polyamory and monogamy. Poly is so much work with constant communication and balancing multiple relationships. Monogamy is simpler but comes with its own challenges, like potential for deeper emotional pain."
Hunter reflects on her first relationship in Euphoria, highlighting how her understanding of love and commitment evolved through that experience.
[76:16] Hunter Schafer:
"My first relationship was with another trans woman, which was my introduction to sex and romance. It was beautiful and taught me so much about myself and relationships."
She also discusses her transition into monogamous relationships, particularly her relationship with her husband, which introduced her to new dimensions of love and partnership.
[84:22] Hunter Schafer:
"My relationship with my husband showed me that monogamy can be deeply fulfilling. Despite the challenges, it's a different kind of love that I cherish."
However, Hunter is candid about the difficulties that come with monogamy, especially in the context of fame and public scrutiny.
[85:00] Hunter Schafer:
"Monogamy requires a lot of communication and trust. When you're in the public eye, it complicates things further, but it's a journey worth taking."
5. Dealing with Cheating and Personal Growth
Hunter shares her painful experience of being cheated on in a monogamous relationship, a situation that profoundly affected her perception of love and trust.
[79:06] Hunter Schafer:
"Being cheated on changed me. I realized that betrayal has nothing to do with who I am; it's about the other person's issues. It was a pivotal moment for my personal growth."
She emphasizes the importance of self-reflection and understanding one's own value beyond external validation.
[80:22] Hunter Schafer:
"My brain, because of how I've been socialized as a trans woman, kept telling me it's all my fault. But I've learned that it's not. It's about the other person's choices and struggles."
Hunter's resilience shines through as she discusses how these experiences have fortified her sense of self and informed her future relationships.
6. New Project: "Cuckoo"
Transitioning from her experiences in Euphoria, Hunter introduces her first lead role in the horror film Cuckoo. She expresses her excitement and the challenges she faced during the production.
[86:26] Hunter Schafer:
"This is my first lead role in a horror movie, and I'm thrilled. Filming in an abandoned post-WWII military village was both terrifying and exhilarating."
Hunter discusses her passion for the horror genre and how working with director Tumen Singer allowed her to explore new facets of her craft.
[86:56] Hunter Schafer:
"I love horror for its stylistic elements. Working with Tumen Singer was a dream come true, and Cuckoo feels like a baby, my first real movie."
She reflects on the physical challenges of filming, particularly in eerie locations, and the sense of camaraderie she developed with the cast and crew.
[88:03] Hunter Schafer:
"Shooting at night in those abandoned buildings was scary, but the cast and crew felt like family. It made the experience unforgettable."
7. Balancing Fame and Personal Life
Hunter elaborates on how she maintains her authentic self amidst the demands of fame. She acknowledges the importance of a supportive network of friends and family who recognize her true identity beyond her public persona.
[48:46] Hunter Schafer:
"Having wonderful friends and family who know me for who I am ensures that I can stay grounded. They treat me as Hunty, not as the famous Hunter Schafer."
She also touches upon the difficulty of maintaining personal relationships while constantly being in the spotlight, highlighting the need for clear boundaries and self-care.
[90:03] Hunter Schafer:
"I've learned to channel my creative energy into acting, which has become another form of art for me. It helps balance the pressures of fame and allows me to stay true to myself."
8. Coping with Public Scrutiny and Mental Health
Hunter doesn't shy away from discussing the mental health challenges that come with being in the public eye. She shares her strategies for coping with anxiety and the invasive nature of fame.
[35:06] Hunter Schafer:
"Fame can make existing in public harder, especially for someone who is socially anxious. I've had to develop ways to balance my public persona with my private self."
She emphasizes the importance of mental health support and the role of therapy in navigating these challenges, encouraging listeners to seek help when needed.
[35:10] Hunter Schafer:
"All the time. Therapy helps in identifying green flags in relationships and practicing them, which is crucial for building healthy connections."
Notable Quotes
Throughout the episode, Hunter Schafer shares memorable insights that resonate deeply with listeners:
On Finding Self-Identity:
[30:33] Hunter Schafer:
"Being trans has been one of the great challenges of my life. It has taught me the power of intuition and that all the answers are inside of me."
On Relationships and Growth:
[85:00] Hunter Schafer:
"Monogamy is simple but comes with its own challenges. It's a journey worth taking despite the complexities."
On Coping with Fame:
[48:46] Hunter Schafer:
"Having wonderful friends and family who know me for who I am ensures that I can stay grounded."
Conclusion
This episode of Call Her Daddy offers a profound glimpse into Hunter Schafer's life, highlighting her resilience, self-awareness, and continuous journey toward self-acceptance and growth. Through her candid discussions about identity, fame, and relationships, Hunter provides valuable insights and relatable experiences that many listeners will find inspiring and comforting. Alex Cooper skillfully navigates the conversation, allowing Hunter's authenticity and strength to shine through, making this episode a standout in the Call Her Daddy series.
Key Takeaways:
Importance of Support Systems: Hunter underscores the significance of having a reliable support network during challenging times, especially when navigating personal identity and public scrutiny.
Navigating Different Relationship Structures: Her experiences with both polyamory and monogamy offer listeners a nuanced understanding of the complexities and rewards associated with each.
Coping with Fame: Hunter's strategies for maintaining her true self amidst fame highlight the importance of boundaries, self-care, and mental health support.
Personal Growth Through Adversity: Despite facing significant challenges, Hunter's journey illustrates how adversity can lead to personal growth and a deeper understanding of oneself.
This episode serves as an empowering narrative for anyone grappling with self-identity, the pressures of fame, or the intricacies of modern relationships. Hunter Schafer's heartfelt storytelling and Alex Cooper's empathetic hosting create a compelling and enriching listening experience.