
Join Alex in the studio for an interview with Madelaine Petsch. For the first time ever, Madelaine opens up about her childhood trauma, her complicated dynamic with her father, changing her mind on having children, and why she’s done being the fixer in relationships. Enjoy!
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Alex Cooper
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Samantha
What is up, Daddy gang?
Alex Cooper
It is your founding father, Alex Co. Call Her Daddy. Madeline Petsch.
Samantha
Welcome to Call Her Daddy. Hi. You look so gorge.
Madelaine Petsch
Thank you. So do you.
Samantha
How did you pick this outfit today?
Madelaine Petsch
Well, I thought if I'm going on Call Her Daddy, I want Alex to call me Daddy. So I'm going to have my titties out.
Samantha
I know. It's. It's perfection. I feel like you have had Literally the craziest year. You've been on an insane filming schedule. Do you have any time off? Are you getting back into something?
Madelaine Petsch
This is, like, the worst time to ask me this question. I had one day off for the next two months, and they just put something on it. So I'm. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed currently. I'm somebody who, like, this is the thing about my job that I was not made for me is I don't do well with change in my schedule.
Samantha
And it changes constantly. You literally being an actress, and you're like, I don't like change. I'm like, literally every five fucking months. You're like, new project, New project I'm fine with.
Madelaine Petsch
But I was just shooting a movie in Tulsa, which I adored, and they kept changing and adding days, and I was like, my brain can't function.
Samantha
Like, oh, my God. You need a full set schedule. I read in an interview you did that you said you basically have, like, a very, very hard time ever relaxing. Like, you're not someone that can relax. Have you gotten better?
Madelaine Petsch
I have, actually. The pandemic, honestly, like, weirdly forced me to find stillness and be okay with it because I couldn't work. I was stuck in my house, and I was like, I have to find a way to manage this. I did actually, by the way, get my brain scanned during the pandemic because I was so anxious all the time that I was like, there's something genuinely wrong with me. That's how bad I am with stillness. And then I was like, okay, no, this is actually. I'm actually just a crazy person because I'm fine.
Samantha
You. Meanwhile, he's like, it looks gorgeous. You're like, everything looks great.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm like, there's a gremlin living in my head. You don't see it?
Samantha
Okay. But to be fair, I feel like so many of us during the pandemic were like that, where you were like, there is something wrong with me.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Okay. October is coming up. I feel like you, Cami, and Lily have been known in the past to do these really, really good Halloween costumes. Are you gonna do anything this year?
Madelaine Petsch
I don't think we are. I'm so sorry. I try every year. I want to let you know I am the one who rallies everybody.
Samantha
You are.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm the one in the group chat who's like, okay, it's August. What are we doing? What's the plan? And this year, I think we are all filming in different places, and there's just no. I even said, what if we just do a photo shoot, but we're all so busy, like it's not even possible.
Samantha
How do you feel, though, about so many celebrities doing that where half the time they don't even go to the party in the costume? They just do the photo shoot and put it on Instagram. How do we feel?
Madelaine Petsch
I don't even care, honestly, because I don't even like the party. I like the dressing up, but I don't even want to go.
Samantha
It's actually being a girl is like loving the getting ready process. And then you get to the party and you're literally like, can we go home and eat pizza and like, hang out Press days.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm like, I'm so excited for press days. Then after glam's over, I'm like, wait, I stopped to go do stuff, right?
Samantha
You just want to, like, look cute. And then you're like, wait, I now actually just want to, like sit here, take some selfies, and then wash it all off and get in bed and watch a movie. Actually fair. Okay, so no Halloween this year. But you. Will you do something for costume?
Madelaine Petsch
I can't. I can't not do something for Halloween. But also, I am so excited. Alex. Six Flags is doing a stranger's maze and they have little me's running around in there. And when I tell you, top 10 most important things to my entire life existence is having a haunted house with me running around in it that I can go and attend. Life is made. I can die happy.
Samantha
We.
Madelaine Petsch
We little you little me's like me's people with little wigs on, running around as if they're me, Maya and the strangers. A dream.
Samantha
Are you going to go?
Madelaine Petsch
Absolutely. I go on the 11th.
Samantha
I am like such a scaredy cat. So, like, I would probably be like, I want to go. And then I'd be so fudgeing scared. I feel like you're going to thrive.
Madelaine Petsch
You don't go to Universal Horror Nights or anything.
Alex Cooper
I just get really scared.
Samantha
I'm such a bitch.
Madelaine Petsch
So are you crazy? I'm such a drive. September 1st, I'm like, I have my fireplace on.
Samantha
No, Madeline, I was like 75 degrees. Okay. Yes to that. But me, I literally was like, I was getting scared of Halloween town. Like, I would get scared of like the. The guy.
Madelaine Petsch
What calabar you scared California running around?
Samantha
Actually, yes. When he was like, yeah, no, he.
Madelaine Petsch
Was a little scary. Came out when we were young, let's be honest.
Samantha
We're going to play a little quick game, okay.
Alex Cooper
It's called firsts and worsts.
Samantha
I'm going to give you a scenario, and you're going to tell me the story behind it.
Madelaine Petsch
Sure.
Samantha
Okay. What was the worst fashion phase that you ever went through in your life?
Madelaine Petsch
Oh. Oh, my God. I had, like, a full scene kid face.
Samantha
Okay, talk to me.
Madelaine Petsch
I actually have gauge holes in my ears that I have to, like, wear stickers in the back of my ears to wear earrings. I had double zero gauges.
Samantha
Wait, what are double zero gauges?
Madelaine Petsch
Like, I don't even know what the sizing is, but my brother was gauging his ears, and he didn't want to go too big, and so he did it on me first. I'm the younger sister. To see what the size would look like. Now he has massive ear holes.
Samantha
I love how he's like, hold on, come over here. Boom.
Madelaine Petsch
He's like. It was like, you have to put Vaseline in and you have to, like, stretch it. It's such a crazy process. I did it when I was in, like, seventh grade. That would be the worst, I think.
Samantha
Yeah, I, like, thought I was, like, in my, like, sceny emo phase. I never had gauges, but I did have the, like, the colored skinny jeans. So horrid.
Madelaine Petsch
That was a rite of passage, though. I honestly think. I look back at pictures, though, and you're like, thank God I deleted my MySpace, all of that stuff, like, long before I became an adult.
Samantha
Oh, no, you have to.
Madelaine Petsch
I don't even have those photos. I want them to be dead forever.
Samantha
It's blackmail of yourself that you put out there willingly. Why? Why did I do this? To my side, Bang.
Madelaine Petsch
No, the way that I bought, like, thinning shears and thinned my own hair, so I had, like, very thin hair do that.
Samantha
And now we all want thick hair. I know. Horrible. Okay, what is the story of your first kiss?
Madelaine Petsch
My first kiss? Oh. Honestly, I have a really weirdly terrible memory when it comes to my personal life. Maybe that's childhood trauma. But the one that I think of is my brother specifically said, like, there's this one guy who goes to this school that I hate more than anybody, and you cannot talk to him at this game. And I was like, you got it. Love you so much. And then I saw him, and I was like, ah, he's kind of hot. What do I do? And then I'm pretty sure he became my boy. My first boyfriend for, like, six months. And my mom would, like, drive us around in our minivan. I think I kissed him in the back of the minivan when My mom was driving.
Samantha
This is so telling of, like, who you are. Like, I needed this information. I'm like, wait a second.
Madelaine Petsch
It was my brother's, like, villain as a child.
Samantha
You know what? We would have been best friends.
Madelaine Petsch
Hell, yeah.
Samantha
Because I am a natural redhead.
Madelaine Petsch
What?
Samantha
Yes. Wait, wait. Oh, my God.
Madelaine Petsch
What?
Samantha
Yes.
Madelaine Petsch
Why are you blonde?
Samantha
I dare you. I know. It was like. I know, I know.
Madelaine Petsch
I need pictures after this.
Samantha
Okay, but you look way better.
Madelaine Petsch
There's no way you actually think you look so cute with red.
Samantha
No, no. Maybe now that I've, like, grown into my face, but not back then. But I like wanting to hook up with my brother's friends, and, like, they didn't really want to go with me.
Madelaine Petsch
What about enemies? Brothers. Enemies that.
Samantha
See, that's what I'm getting to. I did hook up with one of his enemies.
Madelaine Petsch
Love that.
Samantha
And he became my first boyfriend. Shout out, you know who you are. Like, it was. And I loved it.
Madelaine Petsch
Where that guy is.
Samantha
I know. Well, I think I know where he is, but. Okay, that doesn't matter. The problem was, though, that, like, my brother got so upset with me, but it only made me want to love this kid more.
Madelaine Petsch
My brother didn't get mad at all. He's the best. He was like. I mean, if you like him, like, all good.
Samantha
Oh, my God. Wait. You had such better experience with your brother. My brother came in and would, like, throw shit in my room and be like, you have to stop seeing him. And I was like, honestly, the day that you get bored of me seeing him, I'll probably dump him. But the fact that you're. Honestly, it was a CW show. Okay. It was like, One Tree Hill. Okay, next. What was the most random job that you worked before your big break as an actress? I know you had a couple jobs.
Madelaine Petsch
I had a lot. I was a window salesman.
Samantha
Talk to me about that.
Madelaine Petsch
So I was on Craigslist, and I was like, what's the highest paying job I can find? And by the way, I was getting jobs on Craigslist. I absolutely could have been murdered. I was such an idiot when I met you, Madeleine, and it was in Redondo beach, and they were like, you go door to door and you sell windows to people. And I was like, bet. So I went, and it wasn't working. And so I started waiting outside the houses till the wives would leave. And then I'd go to the door and, like, make myself cry and get the husbands to buy windows. And then they. I had a really high return rate, was the problem, because they didn't actually want the windows. They were trying to get the girl who's crying on the doorstep to leave.
Samantha
What a fascinating sales tactic.
Madelaine Petsch
It was interesting. I don't think it was beneficial selling.
Samantha
Windows, picturing you coming up with, like, a reason these people need to buy fucking windows and crying. Okay, but you were savvy.
Madelaine Petsch
I was doing my best. You were what I had to do.
Samantha
You were doing your best?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Okay, what was the. Your first, like, big, big purchase once you got your paycheck for from Riverdale?
Madelaine Petsch
You know, I actually. Every season that we got picked up, I bought myself a new Cartier ring. So I have, like. I have seven Cartier rings for the seven seasons of the show that I literally never wear. Yeah, I was like, I don't wear them, but I have them, and I like looking.
Samantha
They're somewhere.
Madelaine Petsch
They're somewhere.
Samantha
Wait, do you ever wear them?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah, sometimes I actually think I may have lost one, which was a real. It was a real bummer and a move.
Samantha
Okay, what was the worst Riverdale plot line you ever had to act out?
Madelaine Petsch
Where do I begin?
Samantha
Okay, give me. Give me a strong one.
Madelaine Petsch
Okay. Okay. So it's like there's so many going through my head, I can't decide. I had to act with my brother's dead corpse in a wheelchair for an entire season. Mind you, he died four years prior. His corpse should have absolutely rotted. But I was, like, basically losing my mind and speaking to a corpse for an entire season. I would wake up and be like, jj, do you want your tea?
Samantha
See, I, like, definitely, like, watched the first couple seasons, and then when it was getting really crazy, probably around that time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's probably, actually. Yeah, actually.
Madelaine Petsch
Can I change the answer? My actual answer is, this is my. This is my Roman Empire. Okay. When I became a witch on that show. Roberto, is this my camera? Roberto, When I became a witch on that show, there was one thing I told you. I said, I never want to see lasers coming out of my hands. Okay, what did he do? In the season finale of season six, I'm like, Scarlet witching up in the air, singing and crying with. With lasers shooting out of my hands at a comet. At a comet that ends up wiping out all of Riverdale, which is why we're in the 50s in season seven. Hey. What?
Samantha
That'll do it. And because you had the visual of, like, I really don't want this to be me.
Madelaine Petsch
No. And I actually think I might have given him the idea is the problem. I think I said, like, Just please no lasers. Like I'll do anything witchy. It's fun, but no lasers. And then he was like finale. She said she wanted lasers out of.
Samantha
Her hands and you're like God damn it. This will literally follow me for the.
Madelaine Petsch
Rest of oh my. I see it every day. The meme of me like crying and.
Samantha
Screaming and like I just. Okay. But people loved it.
Madelaine Petsch
It's look, it was fun. It was. It was always a good time for me on set.
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Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Why do you think you are finally ready to open up about your childhood?
Madelaine Petsch
I think for a long time I struggled with the idea of is it my story to share? I mean, it involved a lot of other people, my whole family. And I think I got to a place through therapy and, and talking to my friends. And also just I think about when I was a kid, if there was somebody that I loved, just like one person saw this, if somebody, somebody that I loved was talking about what they went through and it was even remotely similar to what I was going through, it would encourage me to continue. So I think it's just kind of an amalgamation of that and then finding the right platform and, and feeling comfortable with you to, to do that.
Samantha
Okay, let's do it. Okay, let's do it, girl. Here we go. Okay, let's go back. Growing up just like very beginning days. What was your family like?
Madelaine Petsch
Honestly, they're the strangest people on the planet, but I adore them. My parents are South African, so they don't really, they're not, they don't understand American culture very well. And they were raising two American children in a small town. I have a wonderful older brother and a mom who is like, do you know people who are destined to be mothers? Like, that's my mom's entire purpose on this planet. And a dad who tried his very best and you know that he was trying his best. But as a kid, I didn't really understand like the way he was behaving and treating me wasn't, wasn't because of me, if that makes sense.
Samantha
When you say that you guys were different because your parents were South African, where were you raised?
Madelaine Petsch
Also Washington State.
Alex Cooper
Washington.
Samantha
Okay. Were you. Were people outwardly like commenting on you guys, like, did you stick out like a sore thumb or was it just like in your head you felt different?
Madelaine Petsch
I think also being a redhead and South African and being raised plant based and without Christianity in my life, it felt like everything that were the core values of being a child, which is like looking normal, having a normalcy in religion and food eating we didn't have. And so it felt more like maybe it was all in my head, but I definitely felt like I didn't belong growing up.
Samantha
So talk to me, growing up about your relationship with your mom and your relationship with your dad and, like, your early memories of those relationships forming?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah, my mom is, like, the protector my mom always was, trying to keep the peace. Her words were peace and tranquility. And so she did. She did her absolute best to not let me see the trickling effects of my father's behavior. My relationship with my father was really complicated because he has behavioral issues, and he would have extreme highs and extreme lows. And in the extreme highs, as a child, it's like, you have the most fun dad in the world. It's like you can't. You can't live and breathe without that person being around. And then that person is ripped away from you and being cold to you and not responding when you tell them that you love them and. And getting angry at you and lashing out for no reason, and you think it's your fault.
Samantha
As a child, do you remember, like, an early core memory of, like, the first time you realized, like, maybe your dad was struggling with mental illness?
Madelaine Petsch
When I was 8, my brother. My mother went South Africa, and my dad and I had some sort of falling out over something. I don't even know what it was. And I told him I loved him. I was, like, crying and telling him I loved him. I wanted him to tell me he loved me back. And he told me he didn't love me. And he left.
Samantha
And so you were alone in the.
Madelaine Petsch
House for a couple hours? Not for very long. And I was just crying in bed the whole time. But I remember sitting there and being like, my father doesn't love me. Like, I did something very wrong. And I was calling my mom, and they're on a different time zone. And that was the first time she was like, this has nothing to do with you. This is fully your dad. And that's when I really first understood that. I think it took a long time and a lot of therapy because we don't use diagnoses in the household either. So it took a lot of therapy for me to figure out what was actually going on.
Samantha
How was that explained to you that, like, we don't use.
Madelaine Petsch
It wasn't. In fact, most of the time it was like, it's PTSD because my dad was in the apartheid war, or it's. It's trauma, or it's just he's having a bad mood, and it's like, that's actually not what's happening. He has a chemical imbalance in his brain that makes him incredibly high and incredibly low. And it took a lot of therapy for Me to feel the validation of a diagnosis, even if he has now gotten one, but even if he never got one, to understand what was actually going on. And it was frustrating because you're like, why do you not want to know? It will help understand and educate us on what's happening. So it's not his fault either. Do you know what I mean? He's not trying to be like that. I also think our parents generation just doesn't really understand mental health. And I think it wasn't a priority. Whereas now, as we become parents, of course it's a priority. But back then, it really just felt like that wasn't even an option.
Samantha
So when you were dealing with difficult moments with your father, like, how would your family talk about it?
Madelaine Petsch
There's a lot of triangulation, which is something I learned in therapy with my mom and my brother and I kind of having little Kikis in my brother's room while one of us is crying because he's done something to them. Always verbal, never anything physical, thankfully. And usually the issue was I became this, like, key to unlocking his good mood. So when there was bad things going on in the house, I would be called to come and fix the problem. So no matter what the issue was, if he was upset with my mother or my brother, I would be sent in to essentially disarm him emotionally.
Samantha
Why do you think that was?
Madelaine Petsch
He kind of has all. He just has this, like. I think a lot of men, like, their little girl is the apple of their eye. And I think. I think I was the apple of his eye. So I think it allowed him to, like, I'd walk in, and most of the time it would work, and I'd be like, daddy, can we. Can we just have a nice night? Can we just figure it out? And it would take him a couple of hours, but sometimes it would work. So I think they kept doing that.
Samantha
Which is at first, I'm sure before you were, like, able to process what was happening. Everyone's like, anything to get him to, like, come down and be in a better mood. But then as you started to get a little bit older into, like, high school, were you. How much was that affecting you kind of being the person that had to be almost like the parental figure in your household?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah. I remember one night I was out, and I won't detail what was happening at my house because it's incredibly personal, but I was out at a ballet, and I got a call saying, you have to come home immediately. I had, like, 16 missed calls, and I had to come home and deal with a situation that was so incredibly unsafe and so disrespectful as a child to put me in that. I have a lot of. I had a lot of resentment towards everyone in my family for putting me in that position when they could have just gone to professionals and dealt with it properly.
Samantha
How did you process any of this?
Madelaine Petsch
I didn't. In fact, it became almost like this compartmentalization where a lot of the time now we'll talk about things that happened, the three of us, my brother and my mom and I, and we'll be like, wait, that's not what happened. Or that didn't happen because it was. Just push it out of your head. Don't think about it. This is just the reality. You don't know anything different.
Samantha
So when you look back on that time of your life, do you now.
Alex Cooper
Have emotions that come up or is.
Samantha
It still kind of like it's more survival mode?
Madelaine Petsch
I. I've worked through it so much in therapy. Like, my first six years of therapy were all about my relationship with my father and my parents and my childhood to the point where now, like, I don't necessarily feel emotional about it. I've worked through all of that. But there are still moments where to. I have to put that hat on and show up in that way.
Samantha
Being in a situation as a child where you feel like you have to become the parent has so many repercussions, obviously, when you get older. But what was going on when you were kind of handling things with your father? Like, what was going on with your mother in those moments?
Madelaine Petsch
God, Alex, I don't even remember. I really don't remember. I think, like, honestly, I don't think she ever asked me to do that. I think I immediately saw a place that I could try to help, and I just tried to help every time.
Samantha
I could in, like, high school or anything. Did you ever confront your parents?
Madelaine Petsch
I didn't confront my parents until I moved out, but I moved out the day I could when I was 18. And I also, like, immersed myself in after school activities. Like I was. That's probably why I am successful, honestly, is because I did not want to be at home. So I did dance from. I went to an arts high school that was 45 minutes away. I did dance from three to nine every single night afterwards. Went home, did homework, went to bed, and then on weekends I did plays in my local theater. Like, I just. I never wanted to be home. So I immersed myself in the arts and escapism. And now I'M here. So it's like, would I still be in this position if I didn't have that? I don't know.
Samantha
I. That's what I was wondering because I'm like all these inconsistencies at home, like how did it affect your life socially? Like, did your friends know what was going on?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah, for sure.
Samantha
Did you have any issues growing up with, like, could you have friends over your house?
Madelaine Petsch
My mom was so such a little soldier, honestly, because she always fought for me to have the most normal childhood she possibly could give me. So I had friends over often, but the friends I was comfortable having over were friends that already knew what was going on, but it also affected their childhood. My childhood best friend is still one of my closest friends now and she has horror stories about being at my parents house.
Samantha
Would you and your brother lean on each other a lot or was it tough to kind of?
Madelaine Petsch
Well, it became really awkward because it's like I'm the one that's going in to fix the situation. What is. I can't even imagine. We've never spoken about this, but I can't even imagine what it must have made him feel like to know that I could go in and make my dad feel better. That created a really weird, unhealthy dynamic between him and I where when I moved out, like we weren't super close. We'd become close in our adult years now and we've worked really hard to get there, but it didn't. We didn't have each other to lean on. Really.
Samantha
Talk to me a little bit more about the resentment aspect because you go through this in your childhood. Your home is going through these like instability moments. You are parentified at a young age. You're throwing yourself into the arts, trying to get away in the moment. Were you resentful or did it take you leaving to become resentful?
Madelaine Petsch
Honestly, the only resent that I feel is seeing now how it seemingly seems so easy for him to be normal. That's the hardest part because now he's actually a pretty wonderful dad.
Samantha
Do you think there's a chance that's because you now can have distance and like leave and remove yourself from it?
Madelaine Petsch
Absolutely.
Samantha
Like if you were living in a house with him, maybe potentially.
Madelaine Petsch
I mean, my mom still lives with him, they're still together. And so it does seem like he's found things that work for him in that regard. But to see how easy it was for him to do that was pretty. It was a tough pill for me to swallow. But I'm Incredibly, incredibly honest with him. Now I've not told him I'm going on this and I'm, I'm very curious to see how that goes. But I'm very honest with him about his behavior now and about how it affected me as a child and he takes it on the chin very well.
Alex Cooper
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Samantha
Okay, let's talk about therapy. You get into therapy. You've been in therapy for a couple years now.
Madelaine Petsch
I've been with the same therapist for nine years. I'm obsessed with her.
Samantha
Wait, nine years.
Madelaine Petsch
It's my longest relationship.
Samantha
Oh, my God. Wait, and you are, like, stronger than ever. Because I can't figure out if, like, you need to switch therapists at a certain point after, like, how many years, but you're. You feel good.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm locked in. It's for life.
Samantha
Oh, I love that for you. So I'm a lifer. What was it that made you want to initially get into therapy nine years ago?
Madelaine Petsch
My relationship that I was in, my romantic relationship was echoing very similar things that was happening with my father here.
Samantha
It's so interesting because so many of my friends and I always talk about this. Like, when you become an adult, you're like, oh, my God, I have to get in because of this guy that I'm seeing, and little do I know. And meanwhile, I have nothing to do with Brad or Ben or whoever the we're talking about. It's fully childhood. But it ignites something in you, and it brings up so much past trauma that you're like, wait, what is this? Why am I acting this way? And then you sit down in a therapist room. They're like, sweetie, I'm gonna hold your hand when I say this. Let's put him over here. This has nothing to do with him. This is all you. And you're like, so you get into therapy.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
How did you start to initially feel when you started to work through.
Madelaine Petsch
I remember the. I had a 15 minute. I was on. I was on set for Riverdale in my trailer season one, and I had a 15 or season two. And at a 15 minute call with her and I was sobbing in 15 minutes, I was like, broken down, all my makeup was off. And I. I was like, this is obviously what I need to be doing. And so Referdale was so wonderful. They would, like, help me find time in my schedule to do therapy. And they were really supportive, but it was just through talking about it. I mean, my relationship was obviously not great if it was echoing that. So the kind of impetus was dealing with that at first for a long time.
Samantha
Yes.
Madelaine Petsch
Breaking yourself out of that and then getting into the weeds with your. With your childhood stuff.
Samantha
When you went back to the childhood stuff, like, what did you find was the hardest stuff to start to unpack with a therapist? Because therap ask pretty, like, pointed questions or they like, ask you to go places that you sometimes don't want, not you don't want to go, but you're like, oh, God. This memory just came up. Like, I can't believe this.
Madelaine Petsch
I think I was struggling with understanding that he didn't not love me. I think there was still this, like, idea in your head when you're a kid that it's like, so deeply ingrained with you that this person can't possibly care about me and love me if they're treating me this way. And I thought I'd worked through that. I thought as an adult, I understood that, that. But there was still that, like, little Madeline inside that was like, my daddy doesn't love me, you know? And so, like, working through that, it still comes up occasionally at 31, nine years later. But I think that was the hardest. The hardest thing was to really, truly, at a cellular level, believe and understand that this has nothing to do with love or how much he cares about me. It has to do with fully him in a chemical imbalance.
Samantha
What was it like when you started to have such success? Like, were your parents.
Madelaine Petsch
It was honestly kind of annoying.
Samantha
Yeah.
Madelaine Petsch
Because it's like with. With my dad, because he was so proud of me. And I'm like, ah. Like, I just want to choke you. What's wrong with you? No. And he's so proud of me and he's so excited. And so then it was complicated because I'm also like, I financially support a lot of my family as well. So it became. It became like no one asked me to. I wanted to help, but it started feeling weird, you know, like it's. It's weird to have a childhood dynamic like that and then to be successful like this and then have able the ability to monetarily help. And it just becomes really messy in my head. And so I had to, like, again, compartmentalize and just figure it out.
Samantha
Well, and because, Madeleine, it's like you used to be this parental figure in your house.
Madelaine Petsch
That's it.
Samantha
You ran away because you didn't want to do it anymore. Then you get success and you go back to that role. And even though they didn't ask you.
Madelaine Petsch
You know, it's just natural to me.
Samantha
Right?
Madelaine Petsch
It's just natural to me. I just stepped back into it. I bought a house in Washington that I moved my brother into so he could get out of the house. He's still there. He loves it and he's so happy in it, and it makes me so happy. But that's the kind of stuff I was doing when I got to. I bought that before I bought my own house.
Samantha
So there's like this caretaker role that you're constantly in.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
But then eventually I was in therapy. You're like, we. I also have to take care of, of myself, not everyone around me. Can you talk to me about, like, one of the biggest breakthroughs that you ever had in therapy, if any.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah. Not dating carbon copies of my father over and over and over again. And even if I tell, I'm like, this is not that. This is not that. This is so not that. This is why it always was that. It was always that. So I have to say, I. I feel at the place of my life now, like I'm. I could not be further from that, which is like the biggest, the biggest success of my life, honestly.
Samantha
That's so real. Where you're like convincing everyone. You're like, no, no, guys, this is so different.
Madelaine Petsch
No, I promise you it's different. And also here's why. And I know I told you last week he did this thing that's exactly like the other thing I told you about. But it's not that.
Samantha
It's not that you're not seeing it.
Madelaine Petsch
You just don't get yourself clocking to you that I'm standing on business. Okay.
Samantha
And your friends are literally like, okay, call us tomorrow. And then literally, you're crying, I'm crying again. I'm like, he did mother. Yeah. I feel like a lot of what you're talking about is like the steps that it took to get to this place, but, like, getting under it a little bit more emotionally.
Madelaine Petsch
Jump in.
Samantha
When you look back, how did the responsibility of managing your dad's emotions your entire life ultimately impact you and your fundamental core and who you became as a human being?
Madelaine Petsch
I remember in therapy once, I said, I'm happiest when I'm somebody else. I'm an actor. And I think that's how I think. Like, I had to really. I spent a lot of my life not loving myself because I was like, if the person who made me doesn't love me, how the fuck am I supposed to love myself? And there are still moments where that, that it's not even like a. A conscious thought, but it's this almost like deep rooted, layered, sewn into the fabric of who I am, like, insecurity of, like. So it really is like, to your point of what we were talking about earlier, taking a break and finding stillness is so important to me because it's moments where I can be like, I love myself, and I love who I am. Even though right now I'm telling you I'm a fucking badass. I love myself more than anyone could possibly love me in the planet. I still have moments where I'm that little Madeline who's, like, sitting in her bed crying because she thinks her dad doesn't love her.
Samantha
I think for so many people that experienced extreme dysfunction in their childhood, there is this, like, want to just keep going and, like, keep. Whether it's succeeding or whatever. It be, like, keep moving so you don't have to really be still and be like, hey, so, like, how are we feeling about the past, like, 20 something years of our life? What do we feel about that? And when you do. Sometimes it's really difficult to get into therapy because I've had friends where they were like, I have to put a pause. Like, this is literally, like, I can't go to work. Like, I am, like, a mess right now because I'm remembering things. Like, I have some friends that forgot about certain memories that, like, it is a journey. But once you get over that hump, it really does bring you to a better place. But it's not easy.
Madelaine Petsch
No.
Samantha
You talking about the men in your life, talk to me about how your relationship with your father, like, actually give me some examples of how it affected the type of men that you were.
Madelaine Petsch
Oh, well, here's one.
Samantha
Okay.
Madelaine Petsch
After me and my. One of my exes broke up, he came out with the same diagnosis as my father.
Samantha
Okay.
Madelaine Petsch
Right. So let's all take a break for.
Samantha
A second on that one. Okay. And you, in the moment, didn't feel like.
Madelaine Petsch
Did I feel like that I was. It was my first love, and it was so, like, all encompassing. And I was like, this is my person. And you just. I just. And that's the thing is, I think watching my mom be with my dad and just decide to be with him forever made me believe that love is actually just staying no matter what.
Samantha
Okay, let's pause and talk about that.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
How many times have you. And give me, like, some, like, things that have happened where you're like, I know I should leave, but I'm in love.
Madelaine Petsch
There was a moment in a relationship where I knew in my heart it was over. I stayed for a year and a half longer. I called all my friends. I was like, I know this is it. I know it's over. I called them. I told them what happened. They were like, yeah, obviously it's over. I stayed for another year and a half because I watched my mom stay Forever. And it's funny because I have friends now who are, like, in relationships with their. Their. Their parenting a child together and they're not happy. And I'm like, trust me. Take it from somebody who grew up in a household where the parents. Parents were dysfunctional. It's actually better for your child to see real love. Go out and find your real love. Give them an example of what a proper relationship is meant to look like so that they don't seek that out when they're adults.
Samantha
It's a good point. It's almost like sometimes people understandably think, like, keeping the family together is really going to be better for everyone in the long run. And then you see people be like, please get a divorce. Like, it actually will be better for all of us. And the parents are like, like, what? Wait.
Madelaine Petsch
At the same time, though, I don't know if that would have been better. My parents also own a business together. So, like, I. I don't think it would have been the right thing. I think they did the right thing. But it did create a really unhealthy idea of what love was. For sure. I thought love was staying.
Samantha
How did you find yourself showing up in these dynamics? Like, I know these men were acting a specific way, but what were you like in your relationships in the past?
Madelaine Petsch
The same I did with my dad. There was conflict. I was immediately fixing it to my detriment. I didn't really allow, like, I still have a hard time allowing conflict to stew. I think when there's unease or. Or conflict, I get really uncomfortable for obvious reasons.
Samantha
And what do you do in those moments now? In the past?
Madelaine Petsch
In the past, I would just scramble to fix it.
Samantha
Even if, like, they were the ones that up. You would.
Madelaine Petsch
You know, I'm really lucky. I haven't had many situations where someone's, like, actually up in a relationship. It's usually just like an argument or disagreement that's gone south. But, yeah, I would always scramble to fix it. Now I stand on business. Now she's quiet. Now she just sits.
Samantha
And everything in you is like.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm rageful inside. Because I'm like, I have to fix it. I have to fix it. I have to fix it. I'm like, it's okay. I'm just gonna move my ankle and sit here and listen to you talk. And then I'm gonna walk away. Even though I don't wanna walk away, I wanna stay and fix it and we'll talk about it tomorrow. That's okay.
Samantha
But when you get in that cycle, it's harder to break than to just keep doing it.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Okay, so now where you're at now, through therapy of in the past, you are going through these moments where you're like, I'm becoming this fixer. I'm doing the same thing that I did with my dad. What are you like now?
Madelaine Petsch
You know, I think I still have a bit of that in me, but I also think that's just part of my personality. So I'm trying to find the, like, navigate the what is me and what is, like, learned behavior, and that's helpful through therapy. I think choosing partners was always tough for me, and I think now I'm really, like, I'm really locked into what I want and who I am and what I deserve.
Samantha
In the past, what was something that would have attracted you to someone that now you would.
Madelaine Petsch
Loving me. Hey, you love me. Oh, my God. So cool. I love me too. Let's do this. Like, could be that simple sometimes. Hey, are you hot? And you love me? Like, let's go. And you're kind of funny. I'm in. You know what I mean? Like, there were the. It was like. Like, I just didn't know what to look for because I didn't have something to look at.
Samantha
But I think, like, again, because there's so many women that listen to this. Like, that is so unfortunately normal of, like. So many young women have this feeling of they're not loved in their childhood, and then they have this feeling of, like, taking anything that feels like genuine love but not security.
Madelaine Petsch
If it feels like security, yeah. Consistency, stability. Even though none of those things were usually true in the relationships, if it felt like security, I was in.
Samantha
Because if he's saying he loves you so much, but he also is, like, doing these things that are inconsistent.
Madelaine Petsch
But he's saying he loves me.
Samantha
So you're gonna hold on to that sometimes.
Madelaine Petsch
I used to, yeah.
Samantha
What is your relationship like now with your father?
Madelaine Petsch
It's complicated. I love that man with every fiber of my being. He is one of the smartest people on the planet. He's also, like. He loves gardening. And he's like. He makes little salads from his garden, and he loves his little greenhouse. And he's. I mean, he's just like this sweet, sweet man. And when I'm able to step away from what happened and just look at the person in front of me, I'm like, you're an egg. You're just this wonderful little creature. But it's still complicated because I still hear what's happening at home. And there are occasional issues, and so I draw really firm boundaries. There are times where I don't talk to him for six months or so, and I'm very comfortable with that. He wishes we spoke more. I'm doing what I can, but I love him a lot, and I'm. I'm very thankful for him doing the work.
Samantha
What is your relationship like with your mom?
Madelaine Petsch
Best friend. Best friend in the whole world. I. When I say, like, woman who was meant to be a mom, I mean woman who was meant to be a mom, I think, if anything, I feel sadness for her sometimes because I. She's so magnificent and so wonderful and so lovable, and I would just give anything. I would give my whole right foot for my mom to feel as loved as she deserves. To feel that would be my dream.
Samantha
I think, like, it obviously can be so difficult when you become an adult to kind of replay what happened in your childhood and look at your parents and realize they're not perfect. They hurt me. I. You know, I didn't have the best situation in moments. Can you talk to me about the types of conversations that you've had to have with your parents in order to move forward to where you're at now?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah, I had a lot. It was a lot of needing validation. It was a lot of needing. Like, this actually happened, right? And this is how it went down. And I did this. And you said this or what happened? Because my brother said, this is what happened. So which one actually happened? And it was a lot of, like, actually trying to piece together my childhood and also saying these things to my father and having him acknowledge that's exactly what happened. That was the most important piece to me to have a relationship. Now.
Samantha
What boundaries have you had to set in order to kind of have a healthier relationship with your father?
Madelaine Petsch
You know, with. Actually, both of my parents, they don't call me me. I call them. That was really important to me. I was like, I'm tired of being the one who gets the phone calls. I will call you when I have time to talk.
Samantha
Oh, that's a good boundary.
Madelaine Petsch
And I ended up. I call my mom almost every day, and my dad. I call. I think we spoke on the phone like, a week ago. I faced on him, like, a week ago to say hi.
Samantha
Do you have any advice for people? Because I can imagine there's a lot of people watching being like, okay, wait. Like, this is so similar to things that I've gone through. Do you have any advice for people of how to approach difficult conversations with a parent?
Madelaine Petsch
I don't know if I'm qualified to give advice, but I will say depending on. If you're still at home. If you're still at home, I think that you should probably manage those conversations very carefully to. To manage your environment so you're not continuously walking on eggshells. But as an adult, honesty and saying your truth. And if you need validation, go seek it out. And if they don't give it to you, cut them off. That's how I feel. If my dad wouldn't have given me validation of those moments, he wouldn't be in my life anymore.
Samantha
Overall, in your situation, when you look back on your childhood, like, is there anything you wished your family could have really done differently?
Madelaine Petsch
I wish I would have felt like a kid. Yeah, I don't. I think, like, now, like, I do so much spiritual work. I'm incredibly spiritual. And when I. When I do healing sessions with my healer, I go to Denver for, like, three days. And we get really. In the week every time. What comes up is like, you just need to go play. Go be a kid. And the coolest thing, Alex, is that my job is playing all day long. Like, what a cool thing. I'm literally a big kid all day. Like, I'm sitting here on a couch with jelly beans, like, talking about my life, like, doing whatever I want. I'm just like, a little sim now. So I am, like. I think I am finding a way to heal that, like, inner Madeline with. Through my work, which is the most beautiful thing I could do.
Samantha
Before we started recording, you had said that you had mentioned there was a time in your life where you didn't think you wanted to have kids.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
And now you think you do.
Madelaine Petsch
I know I do.
Samantha
Talk to me about that shift.
Madelaine Petsch
All my exes are gonna. If they hear this, they're gonna be so pissed off because every. Every man I've ever dated is like, are we gonna have kids or what? And I'm like, no, I don't want children. A lot of it was. There's, like, two sides to it. One was the societal pressure of being a woman of, like, you are here to bear children. I'm like, go yourself. No, I'm not. And also, being a woman in Hollywood, and it's like, you only have so many years before your prime is over, and if you use them on, it's like, it's so much pressure that I was like, I'm just taking this off of the table for now. That was one side. The other side was much more deep rooted in. I Refuse to raise a child in a dysfunctional home. I refuse to raise a child where they believe that they are not loved. I never felt like that was possible because of what I saw as a child. And then as an adult, something clicked. I want to say, eight months ago, this is, like, really recent. I was talking to my therapist and I was like, I mean, if I could just have consistency, like, if I could have a kid with my best friend, I would love that. And she goes, hey, you can't. Can. That's literally. You can pick your partner. You can have a kid with your best friend. And I. It like, mic drop.
Samantha
You're like.
Madelaine Petsch
I was like, wait, what? I can. She goes, yeah, you can. And then it's like, I started thinking about it. I was like, how fun would it be to be able to like. I saw this tick tock. That made me almost just lose my mind. I wish I could show it to you. Of this adult mom showing a video of her daughter saying, it's crazy to see how easily I could have been loved. How easy it was to love a little me. And it's like knife to the heart. But also how cool would it be to, like, be able to give all the love I didn't feel and get to something little and to like, all the things that I feel, all the other youth that I feel now, like, to see that through a child's eyes, like, it just feels so beautiful. And so it was at one point the thing I wanted the least. I was like, I don't want to carry on this bloodline. Let it end here. And now I'm like, no, I can. I can change my narrative. I can rewrite history and I can decide what this looks like, and I have the power to do that.
Samantha
I think that's so beautiful. And I also think it should be more normalized to go through that thought process of, like, it's okay that you changed your mind.
Madelaine Petsch
Oh, my God, now it's so annoying. Everyone's like, are you sure you want them? You've been saying for years you don't, and it's okay. What if. What if you were in my situation? Would you want them? Them also guess what? My ovaries. I can do whatever the I want. I want them now. So shut the. Shut the up.
Samantha
Like, literally crazy.
Madelaine Petsch
Why is it that I. I don't get why people feel so much autonomy over women's bodies. Don't even get me started about politics. I'm not going to go there.
Samantha
No, no, no.
Madelaine Petsch
But in general, why is it Your right to tell me that I'm. I'm. My time is running out or even.
Samantha
Just to judge you of, like. I think it's so important to acknowledge that women can change their mind and it is okay and it is none of our business. Do you have any advice for women who. Who have felt a little bit of just like, shame that they have gone back and forth of if they've wanted kids? Because I think people want you to feel shame. If you haven't known your whole life, then.
Madelaine Petsch
Then you're not meant to be a mom, right? And it's like, actually, I have. I have so much maternal instinct, it's absolutely insane. And I can't wait to put it on something and, like, just love something so much. No, I don't have any advice because I just. I just experienced that. I don't know. Just love your truth and it was a. What anybody says to you, and it's.
Samantha
Okay if you change your mind. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone.
Madelaine Petsch
I don't know why women are so. We have to explain ourselves so much. Like. Like, stop explaining yourself is actually my advice. You don't have to. You want them, say it. You don't want them. That's cool too.
Samantha
You had said all of your ex boyfriends are gonna be like, what the. Talk to me about how at the time not wanting kids and being vocal about that did, if anything, impact your relationships.
Madelaine Petsch
I think it's so much easier for men to say they want kids. Yeah, like, sure you do. Come inside of a woman, get them pregnant. You can leave if you want. Like, it doesn't.
Samantha
Of course you want a kid, right? Call me in nine months, literally. Let me know.
Madelaine Petsch
I've got to grow that thing. I've got to brew it in here. So every guy I've dated has been like, yeah, I want kids one day. And I had such a harsh policy of like, I will not be the mother to your children. I was that crazy about it. I think also because I was like, you don't tell me what I do with my body back then. And now I've like. I think I spend so much of my time as a child in, like, living really heavily in my masculine energy to, like, kind of of father myself, that now I feel comfortable sitting more in my feminine and like, really sitting and being like, no, I want to be a mom and I want to be soft. And I don't. I want to not have to protect myself and like, have. And have that support and, like, feel beautiful in motherhood. And so that was the just position for me. They're gonna be pissed, but, like, there's. That's not the reason we broke up.
Samantha
Yeah.
Madelaine Petsch
For literally any of them.
Samantha
Okay. You said all of your ex boyfriends.
Madelaine Petsch
What's up?
Samantha
Are you single?
Madelaine Petsch
You know, I'm 31 and I, I had a soundbite for you on this. And I am in a place in my life where I've been in a. I've been a public figure for 10 years. And I've tried to navigate my private and my public lives for a very long time, not very well. And the reality is I know I'm on a show where I should be talking about my relationship, but, like, I'm not going to.
Samantha
You're not going to. You know what? I respect you for that. You're like, I finally figured out I need to take it behind closed doors and figure out if we're actually. If we're actually good together. And then maybe one day you're all figure out. Okay, so we don't know if you're in a relationship.
Madelaine Petsch
I do, but you don't.
Samantha
Okay. Oh, thanks. Okay. In this phase of life, what do you want out of a relationship?
Madelaine Petsch
Okay. That's a great question.
Samantha
That's fair.
Madelaine Petsch
Consistency. I think that's one thing that I learned is really important, consistency in a partner. Kindness, love. It's like, honestly, not that hard, I think, to be in a good relationship. And I'm, you know, it's. It's communication support for my career. I, I think the hardest part is that I'm an actor and I naturally will have to go have sex scenes and do things like that. And so trust is really important. I'm a very trustworthy person, but it's hard to trust an actor. And I understand that. Just understanding, communication.
Samantha
What would you say is your best quality in a relationship?
Madelaine Petsch
How much time do you have? Go, I'm a fucking amazing girlfriend now. I am like, the shit that I've done to get here. Like, I'm brilliant.
Samantha
You're like, put me in. You want me.
Madelaine Petsch
You want me. I, I listen and I care and I'm understanding and I'm an incredibly good emotional communicator because of nine years of weekly or two times a week therapy. That'll do it. I have a good group of friends. I. I have a good job. Like, I think there's. I think that, like, I am kind of the whole package. Foreign.
Alex Cooper
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Samantha
Because you know what? My friends and I like to be close. If anything, sometimes we like to sleep in each other's beds, but we have the option to go down the hall just back to our rooms.
Alex Cooper
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Samantha
Maybe from the man of my dreams.
Alex Cooper
And I didn't really understand that he didn't appear to be what he was. You know, Then eventually I found out.
Samantha
Who he really was.
Alex Cooper
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Samantha
I'm gonna describe a guy, and you're gonna say if you're in or out.
Madelaine Petsch
Okay.
Samantha
He took you on the best first date of your life, but he's fresh out of a messy breakup.
Madelaine Petsch
Out.
Samantha
Yeah, I don't care.
Madelaine Petsch
I don't care. I don't. If it's a great date, I don't care.
Samantha
Right. You're like, call me in six months.
Madelaine Petsch
Also, but, like, no, don't, please.
Samantha
No.
Madelaine Petsch
I'm 31.
Samantha
Okay. How soon is too soon for someone after a breakup to be approaching you and, like, really pursuing you?
Madelaine Petsch
It just depends on. It could be the next day if it doesn't feel messy.
Samantha
Yes. Okay. He's super fun and social with his friends, but he's shy and reserved around yours.
Madelaine Petsch
That's fine. I'm in. I think it's kind of charming.
Samantha
Okay. How important is it for you to have your friends be friends with the person that you're dating?
Madelaine Petsch
I think it's important that they get along and that, like, my, my. There's a couple people in my life that are my north stars.
Samantha
Yeah.
Madelaine Petsch
If they love my partner, I'm in. If they hate them, I'm literally out. Like, actually out. Have been there.
Samantha
I have been out. Love. Oh, that's the best.
Madelaine Petsch
She's in the other room. One of them. Them.
Samantha
Perfect.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Okay. He's super communicative, but won't share his location with you.
Madelaine Petsch
Oh, that's fine.
Samantha
Would you ever share a location with a partner?
Madelaine Petsch
I have if they ask.
Samantha
Okay.
Madelaine Petsch
It's like, whatever.
Samantha
Okay. What is the biggest lie that you have ever caught a man in?
Madelaine Petsch
I was dating this guy. I was at work on location, and he called me. He's like, I just got home. I'm going to bed. I love you. Good night. It's great. I love you. Good night. Got a call from the guy I was dating before him. Hey, I met your boyfriend last night at like 4:00am I'm like, hey. No, he was in bed. Were you in bed with him? And I really trusted this guy. I was like, when? I'm telling you, like, blind trust on only this partner? Because he was just such. Like, he was that guy. And I was like, you're lying. You're being crazy. No, I call him the next morning, and I'm like, hey, so weird. But he said that he saw you. He goes, no, no, I was at home. Okay, call him back. I go, You're a fucking liar. He didn't see you. He goes, no. And he starts describing this specific present that I'd gotten for him that he was wearing that like, I had. No one had posted. It was like, there's no. And I was like, wait a second, hold on.
Samantha
Where were you?
Madelaine Petsch
And he goes, oh, he was with this very famous 80s pop star and they were like all over each other at this bar. And then I call my boyfriend and he goes, oh, yeah, maybe I was there for like a second. I don't really remember. And then photos came out of them and I was like, hey, what? Like, hello? Hello? Do you think I'm stupid?
Samantha
Not the photos.
Madelaine Petsch
Do you think I'm dumb?
Samantha
No, not the photos.
Madelaine Petsch
I don't even know if he did any. I'm sure he didn't cheat on me, but the lie was enough for me to be like, I'm done.
Samantha
Well, no, no, the lie is like, crazy. Who cares if you go to an event, just let me know. Like, not. Don't say you're going to bed.
Madelaine Petsch
Hey, but like, why is she all over you? And why are her arms all over you? Like, are you okay?
Samantha
And how are you saying you forgot?
Madelaine Petsch
You forgot? And you also met my ex. You think he's not gonna call me and tell me that you were with some other woman?
Samantha
And you also took multiple pictures that night.
Madelaine Petsch
What? Like what? Yeah, that was crazy. It's actually the only time I've ever caught anybody in a lie.
Samantha
No, the worst is when photo evidence. And he's like, he's gaslighting you. And then you literally like, so what's this?
Madelaine Petsch
And he's literally like, you have to get there. It was basically like the next, like, probably, I want to say like 4pm the next day. He was like, okay, yeah, for a second. I'm like, for a second? For a second. For a second, my ass.
Samantha
Wait, so did you say with him?
Madelaine Petsch
No, no.
Samantha
You broke up with him over that?
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah, absolutely. Love that for you.
Samantha
Okay. There were rumors earlier this year. Look at us having a stare off.
Madelaine Petsch
Shyly.
Samantha
I know the rumors about us. We literally just locked eyes. And I was like, there were rumors. The. All the lights dim. There were rumors that you were dating a certain rapper.
Madelaine Petsch
Oh, that's interesting. I haven't heard those.
Samantha
What? What was going on there?
Madelaine Petsch
I don't know what you're talking about.
Samantha
You don't know? No, I don't know either.
Madelaine Petsch
I don't google myself, so I don't know what you're talking.
Samantha
You don't even know. Okay. What are you talking about, Madeline? I'm gonna.
Madelaine Petsch
I literally don't know what you're talking about.
Samantha
We're pivoting.
Madelaine Petsch
Pivot.
Samantha
Obviously. Your friendship on Riverdale were so iconic and everyone was obsessed with you guys. What was your first impression of those women in general? And, like, did you even have any idea that you would.
Madelaine Petsch
May I set the record straight about something in Riverdale? Actually, yeah, I would love to do this on air, please. Okay. Recently an article came out saying that we all fucked each other on the show. I did not touch a single person on that show with a 10 foot pole. May I just repeat that one more time? I did not fuck a single person on Riverdale. I never touched them. Them. That's what happened. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Samantha
Wait, did people think you fucked the girls or people on set?
Madelaine Petsch
It was just like this article that came out that was like, we all. Each other all the time. And I was like, hey, no, I did not any of you. I don't claim that shit at all.
Samantha
You weren't into anyone on set?
Madelaine Petsch
No, I don't mix business and pleasure like that. I've never hooked up with a co star. Do you know why, though? You know what's really ironic about all this is Cole sat me down during the pilot and was like, if I can give you one piece of advice. Mads, do you have a cigarette? He was like, thanks, guys. You can keep that in. He was like, don't. Hey, don't hook up with any of your co stars, okay? And so I was like, okay, got it. I won't.
Samantha
As he is. He's like, hey, right, Cole?
Madelaine Petsch
Right? But you know what? Honestly, best advice I've ever been given was from Cole Sparks, right?
Samantha
He's like, I'm gonna give you advice that I'm not gonna take myself for sure. But 100.
Madelaine Petsch
But no, I never. I never have.
Samantha
That's smart. I think that's really smart.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah. Thank you. Anyways, back to the girls.
Alex Cooper
Oh, yeah.
Samantha
Back to the girls.
Madelaine Petsch
My first impression was that I actually had known Lily because we. And I know Vanessa, too. I'd known Lily because we did our chem reads together. And she was lovely. And like, we. We also were like, in this thing together. We both hadn't booked it, so we had this, like, kind of hive mind. So we flew there together. We lived together. Season one, like, we were so close and we never met Cammy. Cami, she might have done maybe a Camry with her, but I hadn't Met her, and then Cami walks in, and we all. This is so funny the way we all met. We were on a group chain. We're all at the Sutton Place in Vancouver, and we're like, hey, let's all meet in the Jacuzzi in an hour. Like, what? Like, why are we meeting?
Samantha
This is why the rumors got out that you're all, like, fucking orgies in the hot tub.
Madelaine Petsch
Orgies in the hot tub at the Sutton Place.
Samantha
Do not clip that.
Madelaine Petsch
We are not having orgies at the Sutton Place. No, we all met in the hot tub, and Cammie was. Walks in, and she's got, like. We're. We're like, 20, 21, and she's got this, like, little black bathing suit on. She got this, like, tat under her boob, and she looks all hot. And I was like, you're the coolest person ever. Like, bye. You're never gonna like me. But no, we all became best friends, like, immediately. The three of us were so close. It was interesting because the boys and the girls kind of got clicky. Like, the boys all loved each other, the girls all loved each other. But no, it was. It was like a match made in heaven. Really fast. Almost scarily fast. We were like, this isn't. This is going to burn out quickly. And then it just never did.
Samantha
I feel like, obviously, society tries to pit women against each other and make everyone jealous of each other because it's their favorite thing to do. How did you guys avoid jealousy over, like, roles and screen time and who was getting more attention and the producers and all the things?
Madelaine Petsch
We never had a problem with that ever. I think, because we all started at the exact same place. We were able to just support. That was all it was. It was just supporting each other through the hard times, the lows. I mean, being in your early 20s and booking a show like that, that skyrockets to success. Thank God we had each other. So it became this thing where instead of pitting each other against each other, we were leaning on each other in every second of the day.
Samantha
Do you think you'll ever re. Watch it?
Alex Cooper
No.
Samantha
What about when you have a daughter or a son?
Madelaine Petsch
I'm not letting her watch that. Or him.
Samantha
Wait, why? You were so good. Come on.
Madelaine Petsch
Actually, no, I will. I'm just kidding. I was really good. You're right. No, I love Cheryl. To be honest, I love her. I think it's. It was eight years of my life. There's so many. When I watch the episodes and thinking about what was happening behind the scenes, like, honestly, maybe I will rewatch it one day. I watched the pilot the other day and started sobbing, stop.
Samantha
Alone.
Madelaine Petsch
Because I was like, alone. The show could have been so good. Like, I watched the pilot and I was like, this is what it could have been.
Samantha
You're like, it was so close.
Madelaine Petsch
Ah, we were so close. But I'm also so thankful for it. Like, it's exactly. It's why I'm where I am right now. I met the friends I have. Have. I love Cheryl Blossom more than anyone could ever love a character in my life. She was the most fun, psychotic, crazy woman of the planet Earth. And always a wild ride and always a challenge. So I can't complain. I think watching it would be. There's still like a bit of sadness about it ending. So I think it'd be kind of like heartbreaking to watch because I still miss. I was going to work and see my friends every day.
Samantha
Wait, why did you watch the pilot randomly?
Madelaine Petsch
It was like six. Where was I? I was in Tulsa, Oklahoma, shooting this movie and it was like, recommended for you. Riverdale. And I was like, haha, okay, what's wrong with me? And I was also on like night shoots. I was really over exhausted. I was like, I'll turn it on to go to bed. I watched the whole thing. I'm sobbing in bed by myself. Like, hey, what's wrong with you?
Samantha
Honestly? Really cute. That was really cute.
Madelaine Petsch
I do. I really. Look, I really love the show and I think it was. It was. It was before its time and I think it's really great.
Samantha
Let's talk about your new movie, the Strangers. Chapter two. Tell me everything.
Madelaine Petsch
So movie one is kind of like your typical home invasion film. They try to kill us, they succeed with one, you know? And then the second movie is just me really fighting for my life. More from them in the woods. And this time in crazy circumstances, doing things I never thought I would do. It's honestly, when I tell you, I'm like, how the fuck did I do this stuff? When I watch it, it's like I blackout. I don't know what's happening.
Samantha
What was the hardest scene to shoot?
Madelaine Petsch
There's a scene that is on my fucking. Of course on my DNRs, which. So I can't talk about it specifically, but there's a scene where I work with a creature actor.
Samantha
Okay.
Madelaine Petsch
And we had to VFX it into something else. And I get into a full fight with this thing and it's like, it's really brutal and it's really insane. And it was incredibly tough to shoot, and we had half a day to shoot it. It's supposed to be two days. We didn't have enough time in the schedule. But it's so cool. It's so cool.
Samantha
You have another movie coming out. Maintenance required. This is the complete opposite side of the spectrum, and we're talking about a romantic comedy which, love. The girl has range. Okay. She's got an axe next to her head. She's running. Oh, we're so scared. We're so scared.
Madelaine Petsch
Distress.
Samantha
And then we're Funny falling in love.
Madelaine Petsch
Funny falling in love.
Samantha
Okay, what do you think the Daddy gang will love most about this movie?
Madelaine Petsch
Okay, so Charlie, the lead character, me, is a mechanic, and she's, like, a hot mechanic. And, like, I went to mechanical and, like, everything I'm doing is real, so it's. It's just really cool, dude.
Samantha
It's so refreshing to actually hear, like, you learned how to pull dancing dance from your other movie. You're learning to be a mechanic.
Madelaine Petsch
Dude, I get paid to learn new skills. Why would I not want to do it? They're like, we can get you a handle. I'm like, no, put me in coach. Like, that sounds so much like, why would I not want to do that? That's so fun. And it's like. It's like a ode to. I'm sure you've got males. Probably before most of Daddy Gang's time there was a Daddy Gang.
Samantha
Out loud. It's okay. Sounds good.
Madelaine Petsch
I like it. But it's like an ode to those 90s early aughts Rom coms that we all love. And I feel like we're trying to get back. It's the. The haters to lovers trope. It's really fun. Jacob was brilliant in it. My co star, and it's. It's really fun, and the love is earned.
Samantha
You were a producer on both of these movies. What made you want to step into that role?
Madelaine Petsch
I just. If you can't tell by our conversation, I have, like, a naturally produce oral brain, I feel like. So I can especially be on Riverdale, where the kids kind of ran the show. Like, we were there for so long that we learned everything we could possibly learn, especially the girls. Like, we really soaked that up. We all have production companies now, now, so I think it just comes naturally to me to produce. I just get it. I get scheduling. I understand how development works. I have a good brain for creative writing, and it's just kind of. It was a natural evolution. The strangers I got offered two weeks before we started shooting, and I was like, hey, I love the concept. Script's got to be redone. Let's work on that. I go to Slovakia, like, three days later, I start working on the script with the writers and the producer. I'm writing in Slovakia. And then it just kind of naturally evolved, me producing it. It same with maintenance required. It was a very similar process.
Samantha
That's really cool, too, because even just hearing, like, all the way back to the beginning of this interview, you talking about how you, like, loved the arts, you threw yourself into it now to be continuing to, like, build on what you love. It's so cool to see you now also, like, in these movies. Like, it's just. We love seeing you on our screens. Madeline, thank you so much for coming on. That was such a journey. That was really mon. We literally started. We go high, we go low. We go high, we go low. We went all over the place. But I feel like the fun thing about sitting down with you is, like, we see this version of you that we see on our screens in movies, television shows, we see you online. But to hear you actually talk more about who you are, where you came from, why you are the way you are, I think it's going to let your fans and mine just let, like, fall more in love with you and really appreciate watching you grow. And I'm excited to see what the next decade holds for you, my girl.
Madelaine Petsch
Thanks for making this such a safe space, my girl.
Samantha
Love you.
Madelaine Petsch
Love you.
Samantha
That was really good.
Madelaine Petsch
Yeah.
Samantha
Bye.
Alex Cooper
Daddy Gang. You know what's hotter than a new episode of Call Her Daddy? A new episode with zero ads. Yeah, you heard that right. Subscribe to Sirius XM podcast plus on Apple Podcasts or visit siriusxm.com podcast plus to listen ad free on Spotify or whatever app you're obsessed with. No interruptions. All the chaos. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Tinder. Meeting new people just got way more fun, because now you don't have to do it alone. With Tinder's new Delta Double Date feature, you and your bestie can match together. Tap the Double Date icon to see profiles built for two. When two pairs match, the group chat kicks off. Scope the profiles, send memes, keep the chat fun. Hype each other up.
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Host: Alex Cooper
Guest: Madelaine Petsch
Date: September 17, 2025
In this deeply candid and often hilarious episode of Call Her Daddy, actress Madelaine Petsch (best known for her role as Cheryl Blossom on Riverdale) joins Alex Cooper for an energetic, vulnerable, and wide-ranging conversation. Madelaine opens up for the first time about her tumultuous family history, childhood trauma, mental health, and years of therapy—while also sprinkling in wild Hollywood anecdotes, relationship wisdom, and plenty of laughs. The heart of the episode centers on personal growth, breaking cycles, setting boundaries, and realizing: "You can't fix him."
[02:17 – 04:30]
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Madelaine Petsch’s visit to Call Her Daddy is a vulnerable, hilarious, and ultimately uplifting exploration of overcoming childhood chaos, breaking out of destructive cycles, and learning what it means to love—and be loved—on your own terms. With deep emotional honesty, she makes a PSA that resonates: “You can’t fix him.” Instead, you fix yourself, set boundaries, and reclaim the narrative—while never losing your sense of humor or the instincts that make you unique.