Summer Flings vs. Situationships

Summary

Call Her Daddy: Summer Flings vs. Situationships Episode Release Date: June 29, 2025

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Introduction In the June 29, 2025 episode of Call Her Daddy, host Alex Cooper dives deep into the nuanced differences between summer flings and situationships. Joined by co-host Sofia Franklyn, the episode offers listeners a candid exploration of casual relationships during the peak of summer, providing valuable insights and practical advice to navigate these often confusing dynamics.

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Setting the Stage for Summer Relationships Timestamp: 04:21

As summer reaches its peak, Alex Cooper shares her recent experience during a wine night with a friend. This conversation sparked the idea to address common summer relationship dilemmas, especially for those navigating the blurred lines between fleeting romances and more ambiguous connections.

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Understanding Vacation Romances Timestamp: 06:15

Alex begins by distinguishing vacation romances from other types of casual relationships. She reminisces about her own vacation hookups, emphasizing their temporary nature:

Alex Cooper (06:30): "They are only hot and special and magical because they're temporary."

She warns listeners against mistaking the euphoric feelings of a vacation romance for a deep, lasting connection. The allure of being in a carefree vacation mode can cloud judgment, making it easy to believe that the person met during the trip is a soulmate, even when that's rarely the case.

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Defining Summer Flings Timestamp: 16:45

Shifting focus, Alex explains what constitutes a summer fling:

Alex Cooper (17:00): "A summer fling is not long-term material. They have an expiration date."

Unlike vacation romances, summer flings often involve someone within your own city, allowing for semi-regular interactions. These relationships are characterized by their light-heartedness, prioritizing fun activities like beach days and spontaneous hookups without the burdens of deeper emotional commitments.

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Transitioning to Situationships Timestamp: 25:20

Alex cautions against letting a summer fling extend beyond its intended duration, as doing so can inadvertently lead into a situationship—a more defined but unclear relationship without commitment. She highlights the emotional risks involved:

Alex Cooper (26:00): "If you keep seeing this person past summer, you're gonna enter into situationship territory."

Sofia adds that situationships often come with unbalanced feelings, where one party may develop deeper emotions while the other remains non-committal, leading to potential heartbreak and confusion.

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Practical Advice for Listeners Timestamp: 35:50

To help listeners maintain clarity and protect their mental health, Alex outlines three key rules for managing relationships that risk becoming situationships:

1. Be Clear About Your Intentions

   Alex Cooper (36:10): "You need to be real about what you want for yourself outside of this person."

2. Clarify Exclusivity Establish whether the relationship is exclusive to avoid misunderstandings and prevent one-sided emotional investments.

   Alex Cooper (38:00): "Are you okay with him dating other people?"

3. Keep Expectations Low in Situationships Recognize that a situationship does not equate to a committed relationship and adjust expectations accordingly.

   Alex Cooper (45:30): "Keep your expectations low. This man is not your boyfriend."

These guidelines are designed to help listeners navigate their summer relationships without falling into the pitfalls of unclear commitments.

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Listener Questions and Expert Responses Timestamp: 43:30 - 60:48

Throughout the episode, Alex and Sofia address several listener-submitted questions, offering personalized advice:

1. Handling In-Law Visits A listener struggles with her boyfriend's mother's frequent, lengthy visits. Alex advises setting clear boundaries and communicating openly with her partner to find a compromise that respects both her need for personal space and her partner's relationship with his mother.

2. Wedding Invitation Dilemma Faced with accidentally inviting a coworker to her wedding, a listener seeks guidance on withdrawing the invitation gracefully. The hosts recommend prioritizing the sanctity of the wedding day by limiting guest lists to those who contribute positively to the event, even if it means having uncomfortable conversations.

3. Comparing Partners to Friends' Relationships A listener feels insecure about her younger boyfriend's career and financial status compared to her friends' partners. Alex and Sofia encourage self-reflection on the root causes of these insecurities and emphasize valuing the unique dynamics of one's own relationship rather than making unfavorable comparisons.

4. Friend's Excessive Cosmetic Procedures Concerned about her best friend's growing dependence on cosmetic fillers, a listener wonders if she should intervene. The hosts suggest approaching the situation with empathy, expressing concern without judgment, and recognizing the limits of their ability to influence their friend's choices.

5. Navigating Mixed Signals in Dating When a listener meets a charming guy who hasn't contacted her after a week, Alex advises interpreting his lack of follow-up as disinterest and encourages her to move forward instead of chasing uncertain signals.

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Closing Thoughts Timestamp: 60:47

As the episode wraps up, Alex emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and setting personal boundaries to ensure that summer relationships remain enjoyable and free from unnecessary complications. She encourages listeners to create lasting memories without the emotional entanglements that can often accompany ambiguous relationships.

Alex Cooper (60:30): "We need to be self-aware and we need to keep it moving. We don't have time for people that are going to waste our time and we don't have time for people that aren't going to treat us right."

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Final Remarks The June 29, 2025 episode of Call Her Daddy offers a comprehensive guide to understanding and managing summer flings and situationships. Through relatable anecdotes, expert advice, and thoughtful listener interactions, Alex Cooper and Sofia Franklyn empower women to enjoy their summer romances while safeguarding their emotional well-being.

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Notable Quotes:

• Alex Cooper (06:30): "They are only hot and special and magical because they're temporary."
• Alex Cooper (17:00): "A summer fling is not long-term material. They have an expiration date."
• Alex Cooper (26:00): "If you keep seeing this person past summer, you're gonna enter into situationship territory."
• Alex Cooper (36:10): "You need to be real about what you want for yourself outside of this person."
• Alex Cooper (38:00): "Are you okay with him dating other people?"
• Alex Cooper (45:30): "Keep your expectations low. This man is not your boyfriend."
• Alex Cooper (60:30): "We need to be self-aware and we need to keep it moving. We don't have time for people that are going to waste our time and we don't have time for people that aren't going to treat us right."

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This detailed summary captures the essence of the Call Her Daddy episode, providing listeners with key takeaways and wisdom to navigate summer relationships effectively.

Transcript

[Alex Cooper]

Hi Daddy Gang, it is your father. I am so excited that CallerDaddy has officially joined the SiriusXM family. I cannot wait to talk to new guests and continue to share my crazy personal stories and experiences with you every single week. If you want to hear new episodes ad free, subscribe to Sirius XM Podcasts on Apple Podcasts to start your free trial today. Haagen Dazs is made to be savored and enjoyed slowly introducing new Haagen Dazs Belgian Waffle Cones, a completely new experience that's worth slowing down for. Available in four delicious flavors, including my favorite, Toasted Almond Fudge. It's a crispy Belgian waffle cone full of luxurious vanilla ice cream, topped with toasted almonds and milk chocolate curls and finished with fudge sauce at the bottom. Daddy Gang, I love, love, love a good vanilla chocolate almond. So get yourself some ice cream. New Haagen Dazs Belgian Waffle Cones, available at retailers nationwide. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Tinder. We know that your person doesn't just fall out of the sky.

[Sofia Franklyn]

Unfortunately, Daddy Gang, I know we all wish that, but saying yes to things.

[Alex Cooper]

And being open and putting yourself out there, I truly believe that is going to get you closer to finding them. And Tinder makes that part easier. Here's the thing Daddy Gang, I get it. We are all trying to find our person. Let Tinder do the work for you. Maybe it turns into a great story when you go on a date with.

[Sofia Franklyn]

Someone that you match with on Tinder.

[Alex Cooper]

Okay, maybe it turns into something even better. You'll never know until you match. Explore all the possibilities for yourself. Tinder. It starts with a swipe. Download the app today. Call Her Daddy is brought to you by Uber Eats.

[Sofia Franklyn]

Okay, Daddy gang, we all know Uber Eats has the best selection of local restaurants, but did you know they also eat when it comes to a whole range of delivery services? Now that might be a lot to take in, so let's break it down. Okay, Uber Eats isn't just for locked in salad bowl lunches or pre gaming with Tai. When you can't make it to the store, you can just get about anything you need delivered straight to your door. With Uber Eats right now, you could be checking off your whole shopping list. Okay, of course I'm locked in on UberEats when it comes to getting my lunchtime sandwiches or a good delicious meal after work. But say I need a little cocktail at the end of the day. UberEats is my go to spot to get all of the ingredients. I need sent to my door. I also use Uber Eats for pretty much everything. Paper towels, water, groceries, snacks. I even order a pair of flip flops to the nail salon. Okay? They've got my back no matter where I am. When you can't make it to the store, Uber Eats brings you the store essentially. Okay? There is nothing better than putting on a good show, getting cozy on the couch, and having the perfect meal delivered right to me, along with five other things that I forgot to pick up that day. Uber Eats makes it easy to have it all and get grocery, alcohol and everyday essentials in addition to the restaurant food you love. So in other words, get almost, almost anything with Uber Eats. Order now for alcohol, you must be legal drinking age. Please enjoy responsibly. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Daddy Gang, welcome back to another Sunday session here on Call Her Daddy. It is your father. Okay? We are currently entering the peak of summer, right? And I was recently having a little wine night with one of my friends and I was having a really productive and honest conversation with her. She's currently single and I want to share with you some of the wisdom that came out of that conversation. So for any of my girls who need to hear this, my single girls who need to hear this, listen the fuck up Sunday morning. Fathess Carlin do do do do do do do do. Every Sunday's Father's Day. What the fuck? That was pretty good, right?

[Zoe Saldana]

Hi, Zoe Saldana. Welcome to T Mobile. Here's your new iPhone 16 Pro on us.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Thanks. And here's my old phone to trade in.

[Zoe Saldana]

You don't need a trade in when you switch to T Mobile. We'll give you a new iPhone 16 Pro. Plus we'll help you pay off your old phone up to $800 and you still get to keep it.

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There's always a trade in. I feel like I have to give you something in return for karma.

[Zoe Saldana]

That's okay.

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I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender.

[Zoe Saldana]

I'm good. Seriously.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Let me check this pocket. Oh, mints.

[Zoe Saldana]

Really, I'm fine.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Oh, I have raisins.

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[Sofia Franklyn]

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[Sofia Franklyn]

I'm gonna set the scene for you. Okay, Picture this. The sun is very hot. You're hot, you're tan. Maybe you're three margaritas deep. Okay. And you're scanning the beach for someone to make absolutely terrible decisions with. I see you. I support you. I honestly love that for you. Okay? But before we dive in headfirst into a summer romance, we need to lay some of the ground rules. Okay? I was thinking about it and it's like there is a really fine line between a vacation romance, a summer fling, and then a full blown situationship. And it is so vital to your mental health and my mental health. So you don't write into me freaking out that you know what you're getting yourself into and which one you're getting into. So I want to kind of break down the vacation romance. Back when I was single, which feels like ages ago, I personally loved a vacation hookup. Okay, maybe they're a local who knows all the good spots or they're a foreigner with some like, sexy accent. Maybe they're like a surf instructor with a fucking six pack. Or maybe it's just like a fucking random guy that you match with on Tinder who's staying at your same hotel. Regardless, I feel like these whirlwind vacation flings can feel so special and hot and magical. But here is what I want you all to understand. They are only hot and special and magical because they're temporary. Okay? I want you guys to think about it like when you're meeting a guy on a trip, you are on vacation mode. You're not getting slack notifications. You're not getting emails. You don't have a to do list. You're just focused on your tan lines and maybe who you're gonna skinny dip with. Okay? So of course, no, that feels really euphoric. That's incredible. But that rush of excitement that you're feeling doesn't mean. Now lean in and listen closely. It doesn't mean that that person is your soulmate. Listen, maybe they Are. I feel like that has happened to someone obviously before, but it's very far and few in between. So I want to be realistic today. You need to know what you're getting into, that if you try to extend a vacation fling into the real deal, into the real world, you're at your happiest state when you are on a trip. That's just a fact, right? So it is so easy to get confused and think that this person is like, what is making you happy. It's not the pina colada. It's not the, like people that are being nice at the hotel. It's not the palm trees. Like, it must be him. It must be love. No, it's not. Okay, because think about it. When you get back to your normal life, could you really actually imagine being with them in your normal life? Because the sexy surfer guy that you met on the tropical beach somewhere, maybe he's not so sexy when he's freeloading at your apartment with no job, no friends, and his only real connection is to you. You know what I'm saying? Do you get where I'm going here? Like, my advice today for navigating vacation romances as we kick off summer is just let it be a beautiful memory, daddy gang. And don't try to ruin it by trying to force your vacation world into your actual normal world. Sure, sure, you fucking bitch. You can toss them an Instagram follow, totally fine. But what we don't need to do is start having a FaceTime relationship the second that your flight lands and pretending like you guys are in a full relationship. The last thing you want to do is have this really like fun weekend or week long experience turn into a stretched out long distance thing. No, no, Daddy gang, we don't need this. Not every single guy that you meet or girl you meet, it doesn't have to always end in a notebook romance. Do you get what I'm saying? So that is a vacation situation. So to all of my bitches that have, you know, Miami or the Jersey Shore or California or whatever, wherever you're going this summer for vacation, keep that in mind, okay? It's fun, it's fun, it's fun. And then leave the fun there and go back to your reality. Okay, now I want to talk about summer flings or summer hookups, okay? Because these are an entirely different game than a vacation hookup. This is probably going to be someone that is in your city, right? Someone that you could be seeing like semi regularly. And the most important part is this is someone that you know isn't long term material. Let's really let that sink in. Let's let that thing sink in. Okay? A summer fling is not long term material. They have an expiration date. And that in my opinion, when I look back on any summer fling I ever had, like, that's part of the appeal, right? Because you don't get bothered per se by parts of this person that would actually annoy you in an actual relationship, right? Like maybe you find all of their fucking friends annoying. That's fine. You won't see them after August. You're just having really good fucking sex. Maybe you hate their fucking shitty car. Who cares? You only need it for a backseat hookup. Even if they're unemployed. Even better. Like actually really fudgeing hot. You have more time to day drink in the sun together. It's like your dates with a summer fling should be so light. Beach days, ice cream dates, spontaneous hookups on the beach. Like you're not even trying to go to like white tablecloth dinners or have long emotional conversations and talks about your fucking childhood. June, July, August. That's fine, that's it. So fun. But once we hit the end of August, my biggest advice is, you need to be really careful. If this person is still around, you're all like, okay, Alex, this is like what the fuck? But I'm being dead serious. If you want to keep seeing this person past that three month summer mark, this is what I realized having drinks with my girlfriend. Because it's happened to me and I know it could happen to you and so I don't want it to happen to you. If you keep seeing this person past summer, you're gonna enter into situationship territory. And who the wants that? No, seriously, like, because also when I say that the rules for a situationship are so different from the rules of a summer fling. And I'm saying rules when I'm saying this, I'm just actually trying to make you not get hurt or not get strung along or not string someone. Like, I'm just trying to help you guys here. Obviously do whatever the fudge you want. But in my opinion, no matter who the person you're talking to is during summer by, I think that three month mark someone always is going to start to have feelings. Most of the time it's not both. It's usually one. And all of a sudden you find yourself like, maybe we're checking his follower list, right? And you're spiraling about like whether he's still on dating apps or not, right? Like you're starting to become A little creep. Like, the minute you feel like a creep, you've taken it too far, okay? Don't be a creep, okay? Get it together. Like, this is not the fun fling that you were going for all summer. Carefree aa. So fun. So fun. And now all of a sudden, you're a creep. Like, how did that happen? All of a sudden you're like, oh, my God, Like, I know who he thought. Like, if you know at least five girls by their profile picture that he follows. Creep. I've been there. Creep. Like, if. Like, that's not what we want, okay? And if you find yourself in this accidental situationship with someone, in my opinion, again, my opinion, it's okay if you want me to fuck off, but in my opinion, here are the rules. Number one, I think you need to be real about what you want for yourself outside of this person. Do you want to stay single? Are you ready for a real relationship? What dating goals do you have for yourself? And do they align with the person that you're seeing? And if they don't, okay, thank him for his service, but let's keep it fudgeing, moving, and move the fuck on. So that's number one, we're clear about what we want. Number two, you need to clarify exclusivity. Honey, are you one of the 10 girls on their roster? And are you okay with him dating other people? Like, what happens if he starts to get serious with someone else? I know obviously the exclusivity conversation is the actual worst, but. And you obviously, like, you don't need to ask, like, what are we? Just try to get a sense of clarity on how many we. How many we this person has. Because the more wheeze, you're just still a creep. Truly, though, like, you need to be real with yourself, because I know you bitches, because I've done it too. I'm the only one. Or even if you find out he has a couple others, you're like, but I'm his favorite. Excuse me? No, again, if you're okay with that. That's what I'm saying. If you're okay with that, if you're okay of being one of many, if you're okay with kind of like, sharing the right. Like, ooh, you hop on that thing on Monday, and I'll swirl around and sit on it on Wednesday. Like, oh, my God, amazing. As long as you're okay with that. But for the most part, don't lie to me. We convince ourselves we're okay with it, and we're fucking rattled. We can't sleep, we're having weird dreams, we're getting heat sweats. Like we're not okay with it. If you run into him at the bar and he's with another fucking girl, are you gonna just like take a shot and brush it off and be totally fine? Or are you gonna have a full blown meant to be in the bathroom and drunk text him 30 fucking six times later that night? I thought you loved me. No, you creep. He never loved you. And he let you know that. But you got so in your head and you were like making up this romance novel that never existed. It never existed. So these are the things you unfortunately do need to think about or else you're going to get hurt, right? And if you are looking to keep someone around on your fall lineup, you need to be thinking about these things. Because when you start a relationship as chill and then you potentially want to progress it to more serious, there needs to be a fudgeing conversation. No one is just knowing that all of a sudden our fuck orgies. Now you want to be monogamous with me? Like you gotta say it out loud or he's not gonna know. Okay, it's not gonna get easier. This is like so depressing. You're all like, okay, when does it like get fun? No, but I'm being honest. I think you need this pep talk, you guys, because if I was single, I would want to hear this too. We throw ourselves into summer, we have so much fun, and then all of a sudden we think we're getting a ring and instead you don't even get a call. You know, you don't even get a call back. And it's not gonna get easier if you don't have honest conversations with yourself. And then to kind of tie this all up, I want to talk just about finally the situationship rule number three in my head. And it's kind of what I've been saying and it's kind of a culmination of everything. But keep your expectations low. This man is not your boyfriend. He does not owe you emotional support. This is a fuck buddy with a penis and occasional non sexual hangout privileges. But really, if we're honest with ourselves, the only reason that you guys are hanging out, it's almost like the hangout is foreplay to the casual sex. You know what I mean? So when you catch that you're emotional state is starting to depend on where you are at with this guy, it is time to be real with yourself. That is the immediate red flag in your head. Wait, I'm Checking his Instagram too much. I somehow know his aunt's name. I know all of his ex girlfriend's names by heart. I actually can memorize the weddings they went to together and all of their friend group and his favorite food. And you. You know too much. You know too much. The summer fling to situationship to relationship pipeline is rare and it's not one that I recommend. It's really fucking rare that it works out. Also on Call Her Daddy. I've always said we don't believe in cuffing season over here just because it gets fucking cold outside. Like, we're not like, I guess we'll just date now because. No, no, no. That's how you end up dating a guy you never even saw a future with in the first place. But it was just like, it's cold. I want to drink hot cocoa and decorate a fucking tree with him. Yeah, bitch, call your fucking mom. So you know, daddy gang, have fun this summer. You're all like, how? How the fuck am I supposed to have fun, Alex? You literally just made me want to be fucking celibate. No, no, no. You're gonna have fun this summer and make some memories, you know, scrapbook it up. But when summer ends, my biggest advice is you're gonna let the floor too. I promise you will thank me in the fall. And again, there's going to be the 1% of you. Isn't it so nice to be a part of the 1%? If you're one of those that meets this tanned God and he's a lifeguard or something and he's saving you and then you hook up later that night, and then you go to a party and his friends are normal and a. And then you're hooking up and then it's good, and then it's good, and all of a sudden it's September, and then it's October, and you're going to festivals where you get what the are Halloween things called? Where you get on the thing and you go to the haunted house and you're doing all these fun little things and you're making cookies together. And then he asked you to be his girlfriend. Good for you, you fucking whore. Okay, but that's not most of our experiences. It's a wham, bam, fuck me in the back of your truck, you accidentally put in my asshole, and now I'm in love with you. And oh my God, little did I know you have a wife. That's the reality. Men are liars. That's what this whole episode is actually. Men are disgusting. And men will make you think, oh, yeah, baby. It was just his Monday, baby, and then his next Tuesday. He's your sister and you're like, wait, I thought we were in love. You were in love with the idea of him because you met him in the summer. When I met you in the summer. That's why that song was created. Who sings that? Calvin Harris. Don't care. The point is, don't let yourself be a victim of thinking it's gonna be more than a fucking vacation. Little romance, a summer fling. Situationships are the fucking worst. Unless you're just like, horny as fuck and you just want to have so much sex. Yeah, go for it. Fucking bitch. Love you. Okay, I hope that was helpful to kick off this glorious summer. And, you know, no one should be feeling depressed. It's actually really quite helpful. We avoid feelings and we acknowledge when things are sexual and fun. And if you want to dip into your feelings, then you need to be straight up with. That's all. That's all it is. This is my favorite time of a Sunday session, obviously, is to take a trip. We are gonna slurp down our throats a little escargot. We're gonna look at the skinny men smoking cigarettes and we're gonna fuck them till the sun comes up. Because we are taking a first class flight. Yes, on me.

[Alex Cooper]

First class flight.

[Sofia Franklyn]

We're flying first class rubber in the sky. Because we are going to a little place I'd like to go. Little place I'd like to go. Questions of the mother. Mother. The mother. The motherfucking week. Questions of the mother. Weak questions of the week. Okay, do you guys want to answer some questions? Let's get into it.

[Zoe Saldana]

Hi, Zoe Saldana. Welcome to T Mobile. Here's your new iPhone 16 Pro on us.

[eBay Representative]

Thanks.

[T-Mobile Representative]

And here's my old phone to trade in.

[Zoe Saldana]

You don't need a trade in. When you switch to T mobile, we'll give you a new iPhone 16 Pro. Plus we'll help you pay off your old phone. Up to 800 bucks and you still get to keep it.

[T-Mobile Representative]

There's always a trade in.

[Zoe Saldana]

Not right now. @ T Mobile.

[T-Mobile Representative]

I feel like I have to give you something in return for karma.

[Zoe Saldana]

That's okay.

[T-Mobile Representative]

I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender.

[Zoe Saldana]

I'm good. Seriously.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Let me check this pocket. Oh, mints.

[Zoe Saldana]

Really, I'm fine.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Oh, I have raisins.

[eBay Representative]

I'm a mom.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Wait, wait one sec. I've got cupcakes.

[Sofia Franklyn]

In the car.

[T-Mobile Representative]

It's our best iPhone offer ever. Switch to T Mobile get a new iPhone 16 Pro with Apple Intelligence on us. No trade in needed. We'll even pay off your phone up.

To 800 bucks with 24 monthly bill credits. New line $100 plus a month on experience beyond finance agreement $999.99 and qualifying ported for well qualified plus tax and $10 connection charge payout via virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days credits end amounts due if you pay off early or cancel.

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[Sofia Franklyn]

Question one How do I tell my boyfriend that his mom can't stay with us when she comes to town? She lives out of state and frequently visits. She always stays for a week minimum. I don't want to be that girlfriend who bitches about this, but I just love my own space and hate constantly hosting. I also feel like I'm being judged for every little thing in the house when she's here. Is it rude to ask if he can get her a hotel the next time? Oh my gosh. Okay, first of all, I so feel for you because this was like a thing Matt and I dealt with in the beginning of our relationship where Matt could host every night, every day, everywhere. And when I'm in my house I feel like such an introvert and I had to explain to him like I do. It's not that I don't want to host, I just need to have a better cadence with it and not be doing it so frequently because I recharge in my house and I feel like I can't be my full self when obviously people are here and I'm hosting. And so the fact that this is your mother in law, I can imagine how difficult of a dynamic it is to bring this up to your boyfriend. My first bit of advice is like, you need to tread really carefully because some guys with their moms are such fudgeing freaks and they act actually like they're still sucking from their mom's titty. So just be weary, you know what I mean? Also, that's like a good sign. Like if he's like actually crazy about it, he probably wants to his mom. But that's for another time. It doesn't feel like he wants to his mom. It more feels like he's treating it like this is his mom and he's comfortable with his mom being there. And this is your mother in law, so this is your space. It's weird to have a woman or anyone staying in your home for a week, all like multiple times during the year. That's a lot. So I'm validating you. That's a lot. If it was a weekend like twice a year, totally fine, a week, every few months, I would be like, I'm, I gotta move out. If anything, get me a hotel room. Let me go for a little spa trip while you and your mom bang it up. But no, I think this would be my advice to you. I think you could sit your boyfriend down and be like, hey, I was just thinking about it because I love your mom so much and I always think about it like, wow, she's so lovely and respectful when she comes. And I do love spending time with her, but I feel like a week when she's here is just a lot. And it almost has nothing to do with her. It has to do with me of like having someone in our space for a week. I feel like I can't be my true self. Like if I want to just go sit and relax after a long day of work and be in silence. Like, obviously I'm not going to ignore your mom while she's sitting in the living room and stuff. Or we don't get as much alone time or we don't get to decompress after going to dinners with her. Like, it's hard for me to find a balance and it's impacting me in a way that I don't like how I'm feeling. So I was wondering if we could compromise and either have her stay on weekends, but then if she's going to stay the full week, maybe we get her a hotel. So like during the work week we can just have our normal life and then we can obviously go to dinners or whatever with her. But I just need a little help with boundary setting here because I don't want this to come off. Like, I don't love your mom. I'm just feeling like I don't love people in my space for that amount of time. Because, girlfriend, who the fuck wants their mother in law living with them for a fucking week? I'm sorry, Lisa. I love you. If you're listening to this bitch fucking knows. I'm like, my mother in law would know. She literally will be here. And she's like, okay, you want me to leave? I'm like, yes. Love you, bye. Like, I also don't love the lack of awareness from your mother in law. That's why I'm saying you have to tread lightly. Because from my experience with my mom and Matt's mom, like, they know we love them and we also like our alone time. To the point where I'm like, I'm surprised she hasn't been like, oh my gosh, you guys, I feel like I'm like two in your space. I'm gonna give you guys time. That's where I'm like, ooh, this could be tricky. So maybe compromise on starting with more of like a. Maybe she stays for the weekend or overall, let's just get her a hotel super close by. And if your boyfriend reacts like a crazy person and defends his mom and acts like you're crazy, I'm here to tell you you're not crazy. Mother in law's in your space. That is a recipe for a mental break, honestly. And we don't need that. You know what I mean? So guard your boundaries and. But have a calm conversation with him also. Last point. And this is really how you'll probably even know if you want to marry this man when he brings this up to his mother. If he is down for what you're presenting. In no fucking world should this man present it to his mom like, oh, it was Casey's idea. No, no, no. We're presenting this as a united front. If anything, you take the fucking hit bitch because you came out of her okay? It's your mother. She'll love you forever, but it's too dicey. So make sure that he is presenting it in a way that's not making you look in a bad light. Because then it's just going to be a whole new spew of problems and you don't need that. Okay, next question. I'm getting married this fall and made a mistake. I sent a save the date to a co worker I no longer want at the wedding. No one at my office likes her, but I always gave her a chance until she me over in front of my Boss last week. I know it's my wedding and I can invite who I want, but I'm worried it will come off in a bad way if I don't follow through. Will I look like the mean girl? How do I handle this at work and what do I even say to her? Okay, first of all, that it's really shitty. But my first note to you is, your wedding is not a charity event. And your wedding is also not a co workers mingling happy hour event. This is your wedding and it is a day to be completely about you. And so if you're having regret, and also it's one thing, if you're having regret, it's another thing if this person literally just you over at work, you, I get, are in a weird position. But I would rather you be in a weird position to end this rather than get to your wedding and have someone there that you don't like. So yes, it's going to be a little uncomfortable, but let's also make sure that you're not compromising just to make someone feel good. So this would be my advice. It's tough because since it's a work dynamic and you're gonna see her obviously when you come back from your wedding, I don't think you need to tell her. Obviously it's up to you. But like you have to see this woman every day. It's one thing if it's a friendship breakup, but like this is someone you work with, right? So my advice would be you send a text or you say it in person. You said you only sent a save the date. You didn't send them like the official now new invite of like details and everything of the wedding. So I think you could text her and say, hey, I wanted to let you know that over the past month or two, my husband and I have been going through our wedding list and due to a bunch of different circumstances, we are pulling back on the number of guests. And I don't think you're going to be able to come now. And I just wanted to let you know, no hard feelings and appreciate your support and leave it at that. And I think that if she comes at you and is anything other than totally understanding that because. Oh, now you, oh, you're gonna come at me for a second. First of all, why would you. You shouldn't even be at my wedding. You should have the self awareness to not even think you should come. Hopefully she was never even gonna come, right, because she just you over in front of your boss. But if she gets nasty with it, like, wow, other co workers are going and I'm not coming. Like, got it. Like, Macy, like, you're a. I think you just leave it. I don't think in the wake of your wedding, I don't think that you need drama. And sending this text is going to give you temporary, but then it's going to alleviate so much anxiety on the day that actually matters. So be straight up, but not fully unless you want to. And you can be like, hey, I don't really appreciate everything that went down the other week with our boss. I felt like you were undermining me and it made me look in a really bad light. And I just. I know I sent you a save the date and I don't even have, like, ill will towards you, but because it is my wedding, I don't want to have anyone there that I'm not on, like, like, perfect, great terms with. And I don't feel that way with you right now. And so, respectfully, I'm going to decline the offer. And maybe when I'm back, we can look to, like, repair things. But for right now, I want to have a clear head for my wedding and I don't want drama either one being more direct or a little less direct. Do it. You will feel so much better. I remember Matt and I had a couple people, but one person kind of like, more specifically that we just, like, we knew they would think they were going to be invited to our wedding. And at the same time, we were like, I don't want to invite them. And we almost were having, like, over dinner conversations when we would talk about our wedding leading up to, we would find ourselves getting anxiety about this one person and it was someone more in Matt's life. And then finally I remember just being like, babe, pause. Listen to us. We're not even focusing anymore on, like, how this is a day about us and our love and our marriage and our family like this. We have our answer. And it was so hard. But I'm so happy we didn't invite them. And I look back and we still say we made the right decision. So trust your gut on this one. And I'm really sorry that that's so shit. You don't want drama around your wedding, but to make you feel better, everyone has drama around their wedding. And if this is. This is the peak of it for you. Girl, girl, you got out easy. Okay, next question. Okay. Hi, father. How do I stop comparing my boyfriend to my friend's partners? I'm 29 and most of my friends are in their early 30s with partners in their mid-30s. My boyfriend is 26, so he's kind of a decade behind when it comes to career and finances. I get insecure sometimes because he still is starting out, and we don't really have the same financial stability as my friends and their partners. I know it's not his fault. He has a good job and is working hard, but I can't help feeling a little jealous when I see my friends, partners and what they bring to the table. Okay. Oh, my God. I have a lot of thoughts, and I'm gonna just be really honest. And obviously you know your situation better than anyone, so. And I don't have all the details, but I'm just gonna kind of rattle off some of my thoughts. Number one for me, I think I would have a hard time dating a younger man more in that, like, 20, 30 range, obviously, if you were, like, in your 50s, 60s, re dating, like, sure. But it's like that pivotal time where I feel like maturity is a big, obvious, glaring thing. Like, it's like you can almost tell, like, when someone's in their 20s, first their 30s. Right. And my worry for you is, when you're writing this, if you felt really secure with your relationship, which you're saying. I guess you're saying you're. You don't. You're saying you get insecure sometimes. My worry is this is something that is highlighting a bigger issue in your relationship. If you were madly in love with this person and you thought they were so talented and smart and all the things. I don't know if you would be saying this again. I think it's normal to compare. That's literally all we do in life. Right? You're comparing how you look compared to someone. You're comparing your job, your house, your finances, your looks, your outfits, your family dynamics, your status, like, all of it. That's normal. But the fact that you're feeling insecure about your partner, I've had that in a different way. And, like, it doesn't go away. It doesn't go away because if you really are in love with someone and you feel good about them, you would find holes in your friends, partners, and be like, yeah, but they have that. But, like, he has this. You know what I mean? And I worry for you that him being younger and not where you want him to technically be could potentially be something that keeps eating at you throughout your relationship. I could be completely wrong, and I may be projecting because I have a friend that was in the situation a few years ago where it was just like, eventually she was like, I feel like I'm dating a kid. And I didn't think that the four or five year age gap was going to impact me. But I guess men naturally are more immature than women and it takes them longer to mature. So there's a lot of factors that are up against you. So I think you need to sit with yourself and recognize. Is this literally just because of a money thing? That is so normal to feel insecure financially at stages in your life when other people have not that burden. Totally fair. But look underneath the hood and is it like. Or are you also kind of like, I feel like you're. I'm insecure because I'm dating him and he's not this and he's not that and he's not this and we're all in our 30s at this stage and he's like a baby and just graduated college and is trying to figure his out. But I'm sorry that I'm sure that's weighing on you, but you'll know the answer. Like, you will know, would it solve everything if he had all the money in the world? I don't know. You have. You will know that within yourself. And last thing I'll leave you with, and this is something that I talk about with my friends and Matt all the time, is like, please keep in mind, when you're looking at your friends and their relationships, it doesn't mean that they have it all too right. Like, you are looking at something that is clearly an insecurity of yours. They have more financial stability, therefore they are able to do more things. They can go to more concerts, they can go out for more dinners, they can go to nicer places. Whatever it be, that's your insecurity in your relationship. So it's. You're projecting and you're looking at being like, they have it all, but they all may be going through their own. Maybe there's some of your friends that like haven't had sex in months and their romantic physical connection isn't there. Maybe there's people that are actually overspending and it looks like they're enjoying themselves, but they're also in financial situation that they're not feeling. Like, we don't know, maybe they're fighting. Maybe they're. Or they're great regardless. We always look at people and when they have something that we don't have, we can get insecure and feel like, damn, I, I want that. But really you don't want that because that's not your relationship. You know that you don't have the same type as your friend. You know that that guy wouldn't be as good for you because you know what I mean. So everything is relative. But it's tough. I completely acknowledge that. I have definitely been victim of it. Okay. Oh my God. I chose this one for all the girls. Daddy, I need help. I have a serious shopping problem. I spend way too much money on shoes, clothes, jewelry, purses, everything. Fashion's always been how I express myself. And buying new stuff makes me feel like I'm keeping up. But I'm supposed to be saving for a wedding and a house later this year and I cannot stop spending. I went through my closet the other day and have a full blown. Had a full blown panic attack when I realized how much I've spent on stuff I've worn. Maybe once. I don't know how to stop. Please help me. Get it together, girl. You came to the right place. I totally get it. Like I have been someone that on Sundays to not get the Sunday scaries. It relaxes me to watch Grey's Anatomy and scroll on and shop. And maybe I'm not even buying some of the shit, but it's nice and fun to scroll. I think that's like a normal thing for girls to shop. It does sound like you obviously have a little bit more of a problem where you can't stop yourself. You're even saying that there's some stuff in your closet that you have not even like worn. Here would be my advice. I don't know if this is a little too extreme, but maybe try it could help. I think maybe you should go on a 30 day fashion shopping fast. And I think you should even if you want to like go and shop online, but don't buy anything, even just like put links into your notes app and be like, once the 30 days is over, I want to buy this. And then if you still want to buy it, well, that's on you. But 30 days without shopping and instead what I would do. And I've actually been annoyed with myself. And I think everyone does this. You buy something and you barely wear it. I would urge you in these 30 days of your shopping fast to go into your closet and do a couple things. Number one, put outfits together with things that you haven't worn and force yourself to wear it that day. Like, I think we all get into a habit of kind of having a closet of stuff, but you wear pretty similar stuff. You have your go to shirt, you have your go to jacket, pants, all the things and, and if you haven't worn it in a while, force yourself to wear it. And if you are like, I actually don't want to wear it, why don't you go and sell it? Go on Poshmark. Go on ebay. Go on the realreal. Like, go and sell the shit and make your money back of the stuff that you're actually not buying and you just bought on a shopping whim. But overall, I think you need to look at yourself. And if you can't make it the 30 days, you may actually need to get into therapy and get some help because this does sound a little bit like, like an addiction. And you don't want to continue your life where you are blowing all of your finances on clothes that you're also barely wearing. But yeah, let's do a fast. Maybe I'll do it with you. Who knows? Okay, this one's heavy.

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[Sofia Franklyn]

Daddy, I don't know what to do. My best friend just told me that she's been having an affair with a married man with kids. She recently broke up with her boyfriend of three years and apparently this has been going on ever since. I told her straight up, I don't think it's okay, but she said she didn't care and she's still doing it. I'm honestly sick over it. I don't agree with it at all and it's making me question who she even is. But she's been my best friend for 15 years. I feel stuck. I can't talk to anyone about it and I just don't know what to do. Dude, that is fucked behavior. Damn. I'm really sorry because when you added in the 15 year friendship, I was like, fuck that. I was going to be like, fudge this bitch. And then I'm like, oh my God, I get it. It's your friend of 15 years and she basically told you fudge off. I'm not going to listen to you. Where does that leave you? My opinion, If I'm putting myself in your shoes, that leaves you to realize all you can do is control yourself in this moment. There is no reason for you to try to convince her stop having this affair. It's only going to rupture your relationship even more. And if she doesn't want to listen to you, she's not going to listen to you. We're all adults here, you know, so if anything, the only reason for you to keep going at her and trying to get her to stop would be to fulfill something in yourself to make you feel better. Like you tried to get her away from this person and you're trying to save this family. I think you need to just let it go. And I think the hard thing about friendships is, especially long term friendships, is sometimes we have such an image of our friends from when we met them and our early days of our relationship that we don't actually look at ourselves and be like, how has my friendship with this person progressed? And do I like who they are as a person. And do I like how I feel around them? And this is a perfect example of someone like, yes, there is history there, but this is, like, a pretty fucked up thing for a person to do. So I think you need to pull back. And the hope is you pull back, you focus on yourself. You don't let this take up space in your brain because it's icky and it's like, foul behavior. Like, I agree. I couldn't be around a friend that's having a fuck affair with a married man with kids. Like, it is gross. But the more you focus on yourself, the one hope would be she eventually comes to you in a month, six months, a year, and is like, I am so sorry. I don't know what the I was going through, and I don't know what that was feeding in me. And I look back and I was a shell of a human being of myself. After my breakup, I threw myself into this. I thought it would make me feel better. It didn't. And, like, I'm so fucking sorry for pushing you away. And I am disgusted with myself. Like, I really. I'm gonna get into therapy and I don't know what the fuck happened. That would be the hope and the dream. Unfortunately, I think as adults, we have to start to recognize people are gonna.

[Alex Cooper]

Make weird fucking decisions, right?

[Sofia Franklyn]

We've all been there. Your friend marries a guy that you're like. He's like, literally, emotionally or verbally or hopefully not, but, like, physically abusive. And we all can't sit here and watch this happen and feel good. So you probably stop going over for dinners as much. And you have friends who become so angry about their situation, whether it's their job or the relationship, that they start to be an angry drunk. When you guys go out to dinners, right? And you're like, I can't keep wasting my Fridays on the one time of the week that I get to go out and have you, like, yelling at me. Like, everyone has that thing that you're kind of like, I don't want to be a part of this anymore. News, slash, you don't have to be a part of it anymore. And I know it feels weird because when you're the person that's not being the aggressor or doing the wrong thing, you almost feel this sense of like, but I can't give up on them. But it would be weird to pull away. No, no. At some point, yes. After you have said something to your friend, after you've actively tried to help them and they actively look you in the face and say off. Basically. You do then have to take some accountability to pull away and recognize you can only fully control yourself. And if they want to come back, they will come back. But maybe, maybe this is kind of the end of a beautiful friendship for what it was for a while. And maybe you can start to look at, has it actually been that good the past year or two? Has she been in tune with you and has she been a good friend? I don't know. Know. And if she has, then we can hope that she comes back and she hopefully the wife walks in on them, she runs down the street, she breaks her leg. Well, no, but you know what I mean. And she's a wake up call. She almost gets hit by a car. She's in the hospital, she calls you and she says, I'm never gonna a married man again. You never know. Something could fall out of the sky, hit her in the head, she's concussed, she wakes up, she's a better woman. We can hope, but we can't expect. Okay, next. This is tough. Are we ready? All right, daddy. This might be a weird one, but I need help. How do I tell my best friend that she needs to chill on the filler? It started with a little Botox, then some lip filler, and now it's every month she's getting something else put in her face. She's already so beautiful. And now she's starting to look kind of unrecognizable. Is it my job as her best friend to tell her to stop, or is this just a canon event I can't interfere with? Damn, that's really fucking tough. Because I'm trying to think, like, what I would do because a part of me feels. I feel for you, right? Because it's like bringing up your friends, looks in general is tough. And I think someone that's gonna get an excessive amount of work done and that, like, it's one thing to be like botox, yay, a little bit of filler.

[T-Mobile Representative]

Woo.

[Sofia Franklyn]

And then once they get to the point where it's like, girl, like, your face is looking like a cinder block, you clearly there's something going on with her, right? Like there is an insecurity in her. There's something going on and she's taking it too far and she doesn't see it, it's like fucking eyebrow blindness that everyone talks about on TikTok. Or it's filler blindness. Like, I get that. Or it's blonde blindness where it's like, I'm not blonde enough. And it's like you have three strands of hair left on your head, and they are platinum blonde number one. My piece of advice, you have to kind of assess what is your relationship with this person? Because I'm thinking about, like, my best friends and I, if any of us are ever going to get something done, we FaceTime and call that person, and it's like, okay, I was thinking about doing this. Like, do you think I need it, or am I being insane? So if my friend. I feel like I would have a gauge to be like, no, no, wait. Because last time you did this. Don't do that. If you don't have that relationship, this is how I would approach it. I think you sit her down not actually, like, schedule meeting, but, like, whether you're having drinks or you're at a dinner or you're just hanging. And I think you say, hey, I wanted to bring something up that I, like, hate that I'm bringing this up. But I know that if the roles were reversed, I would want you to say something to me. And I want you to know I love you so much, and I think you're so beautiful, and you're my best friend. And I'm only saying this because I would want you to do the same for me. I have obviously noticed that you've been getting more stuff done lately, and I just wanted to check in with you and see, like, how you're doing and make sure you're okay. I think you have to make sure. Did you kind of, like, notice my wording here where I'm not like. So I've noticed that you've been getting a lot done to your face, and you look so different, and it is starting to look botched. So I'm just wondering, like, why you're doing that. Because, like, it's not looking good. No, don't use the word botched. Don't even use the words. Like, you're looking different. Like, obviously she can't see it. If she knew, like, wow, I look crazy. But it takes a while to get to the point where you recognize that, right? And so I think it's being very loving, and it's just saying, as a friend, I would want you to do the same for me. And then again, like, I feel like the theme of this is, like, you can only go so far. If she's like, like, what are you talking about? And blows up on you, she is eventually gonna realize it, right? Because one day a doctor is going to be like, I can't put another syringe in your face. Or she's going to take it so far that then all of a sudden she'll have her own recognition because her mom's gonna send her a picture of herself when she was a child. And she'll be like, that wasn't me. And they're like, no, Rebecca, it's literally you. But post nose job, chin implant, jaw implant, you do look a little different. And she'd be like, like, oh, my God, I was so cute. Why do I look like that? Like, something will break for her, but maybe you can get in there and just make her not feel insecure is the biggest thing. You have been there. We've all been there. If a friend brings something up to you and they do it in a way that you can recognize it in the moment, but because they're being so aggressive, you get defensive. And it's like, maybe later that night it will actually sink in and you'll be able to handle it. But then you're like, well, I'm not going to talk to her about it because she was so judgy and. And so rude about how she handled it. So it's with grace and it's with ease. But again, everyone's gonna do what they want to do. So you don't want to fuck up your relationship by telling her that her face is botched, you know? Okay, this is one that I really feel is good to end with because it honestly kinda kind of goes back to the beginning of this episode. Hi, Daddy. I went out last weekend and met this really cute guy. We talked seriously all night and had the best chemistry. He ended up walking me home and asking for my number, but didn't try to kiss me or anything. It's been a week and he hasn't texted me. I found his Instagram and I'm thinking about DMing him, but is that crazy? I want to shoot my shot. But also, I know that if he wanted to, he would. I kind of just want to know whether he's into me or not so I can mentally compartmentalize him. So, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie. You have your answer. You know what I mean? Like, let's use those context clues. He walked you home. He didn't try to kiss you. He asked for your number. He asked for your number. He didn't give you his number. And when he asked for your number, he didn't say, texting you now, so you have it. He didn't call you saying, that's my number. Did that work? Did I write that down? He just, oh, thanks for your number. Bye. Walked away. It's been a week. You haven't heard from him. You haven't heard from him. You haven't heard from him. He has your number. He hasn't heard from. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. He fucking hate you. He doesn't hate you, but he doesn't like you. You know what I mean? We gotta just. We gotta just fucking take it on the chin and roll and doesn't text you immediately in the next 24 hours. 48 hours. It's. It's a no for him, dog, you know? And I feel like you going and looking at his Instagram and then you're gonna try to DM him. Why do you have to DM him? Let's remember. Because he didn't give you his number. You know what I mean? For all you know, Samantha has a full girlfriend. Like, this is something that is so hard in the moment to notice, and I so get that. But that's why you need that fatherly advice to smack it out of you, to be like, no, no, no, no. Why do you have to DM him? Because you don't have the number. He asked for your number and he has never texted you again. I know it's hard, and I think this is now to be less of aggressive. Why I think it's so hard sometimes is when you have a really fun night with someone, there's two things that can happen. Number one, you can be misinterpreting the fun night as, oh, my God, this is literally the beginning of the rest of my life. And they're blown off steam after work, and they're just having a nice time. And if it was you or Samantha or Caroline or Grandma Eda, he would have talked to anyone that night at the bar. You know what I mean? Like, he just was looking for a little bit of comfort and a good time talk, and then that was it. So you have to compartmentalize. Like, this was a good moment, but that doesn't mean shit. It was a good moment, but how did he act after the good moment? It's easy to have a fun night where you don't know someone's backstory, you don't know their baggage, you don't know jack shit. They're just a fucking pretty girl in a bar and a hot guy in a bar, and you buy a drink together, you hit it off, he walks you home and he fucking never talks to you again. That is the easiest thing to actually do. And the harder Thing to do is follow up and actually have a date and now have a conversation and have a planned situation, and he's not doing that. It sucks, though. I think I've been there where I've, you know, met a guy at a bar and been like, oh, my God, that was so fun. And then he just didn't give me the same energy back the following days, and I was like, got it. This is kind of weird. Clearly, I'm misreading this. So I'm gonna pull back, and I think that's all you can do. Wait in the wings. If he ever text you, I'm gonna. I'm gonna give you the cheat code and just give you the answer. Now. He's never gonna text you, so go back out to the bars, find another guy. And I actually was gonna say, make sure you get their number next. I think you now know if a man ever asks for your number and he doesn't give you his back or he doesn't text you, immediately, he's kind of trying to. Awkward exit. We've all done that, Daddy gang. We have all done that. And I have done that. I have done that to friends of Matt's that are, like, periphery friends that, like, we run into, and they're like, oh, my God. Well. Oh, you're like, oh, my God. We should get to. Oh, totally, totally. Give me your number. Give me that number. Give me that number. And I am never gonna text you. Not because all for different reasons. Sometimes it's like, because there's nothing to say. And in the moment, understandably, if someone. I give credit. There's moments in work settings where someone's like, oh, yeah, maybe we'll. We know. But we're trying to end the conversation. And it's weird to just be like, bye sometimes. And people word vomit. So they're like, let's get a little drink. And it's like, we don't need to get a drink. We just did business. We're all good. Email me. You know what I mean? So sometimes it's word vomit. And that's what I worry for you. He's standing on your stoop, your hair is in the breeze, you're kind of leaning forward, like, trying to kiss him. And he's like, why don't you give me your number? Why don't you give me your number and I'll. I'll hit you up. It's almost like a cop out where it's like an easy little, like, make them think I'm coming back. He's never coming back, so that sucks. But at least you didn't like date him for a year. And he's a narcissist. There's always a silver lining. Daddy Gang, thank you so much for tuning in on this Sunday session. It feels right to be back. Every Sunday is Father's Day. You know what I mean? Me, you, and just some really hard truths. But good truths. Truths. Because it's important, right? We need to be self aware and we need to keep it moving. We don't have time for pieces of. We don't have time for people that are going to waste our time and we don't have time for people that aren't going to treat us right. So. Love you. I'll see you in two Sundays.

[Alex Cooper]

Love you.

[Sofia Franklyn]

Bye.

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