Pat Novak for Hire: Rita Malloy 04/23/1949

Summary

Pat Novak for Hire: Rita Malloy (04/23/1949)

Episode Overview

This episode of Pat Novak for Hire plunges listeners into the shadowy world of San Francisco’s waterfront, where Pat Novak is drawn into a deadly mystery after his boat is stolen, a stranger is found dead, and a glamorous nightclub dancer is murdered. Accused of the crimes and on the run, Novak must unravel the connections between a hired gunman, nightclub intrigue, and an ill-fated woman named Rita Malloy. The episode is a classic example of hard-boiled detective radio, brimming with sharp dialogue, dark humor, and twisty plotting.

---

Key Discussion Points and Plot Breakdown

1. An Unwelcome Visitor and a Deadly Night [00:42–04:59]

• Setting the Scene: Pat Novak introduces himself and the dangerous waters of the San Francisco waterfront.
• Surprise Intruder: Novak awakens to find two men in his apartment demanding the keys to his boat.
  • Memorable Exchange: Novak—"I'm not crazy about waking up with strangers sitting on my bed. Especially if they got baritone voices." [02:35]
• Theft and Assault: The men take his wallet and keys, then knock him out.

2. The Stolen Boat and Discovery of a Corpse [04:16–07:09]

• Phone Call from Joe Powers: Joe calls Novak to report that one of his boats has drifted back—with a dead man aboard.
  • Joe (on urgency): “Hurry up or you'll run a dead heat with Homicide. There's a dead guy in the boat.” [04:45]
• On the Waterfront: Novak inspects the corpse and finds a hotel key labeled ‘Room 425’ at the Royal Arms Hotel.

3. Hotel Room Clues and Another Body [07:09–10:47]

• Accompanied by Jocko Madigan: Novak and his drinking pal, Jocko, visit the Royal Arms Hotel using the key found on the dead man.
• Discovery: They find Rita Malloy’s body, dead from a head wound.
  • Jocko (on Rita): "She has lots of character." [09:27]
• Inspector Hellman Arrives: Hellman quickly pegs Novak as the main suspect, gives him 24 hours to find answers.
  • Hellman: "You look like a ten to one shot, Novak. And I got my money on you all the way." [10:13]

4. Nightclub Investigations [11:50–16:12]

• At the El Palateo: Novak questions Manny Ryan, club part-owner and Rita’s ex-boyfriend, and is stonewalled.
  • Novak (challenging Ryan): "You better have a big, fat alibi ready for tonight." [13:15]
• Talking to Tony Drake: Novak meets Rita’s replacement in the show. Their charged banter masks suspicion and hidden motives.
  • Tony: "What do I do? Tremble?" [14:51]
  • Tony (on Rita): "Around here, that was an occupational hazard." [14:56]
• Gathers Info for List of Suspects: Novak asks Tony for a comprehensive list of Rita’s associates, planning to pick it up later.

5. Clues Come Together [17:14–18:13]

• Identification of the Dead Man: Jocko confirms the corpse from Novak’s boat is Bruno Zweiss, a wanted gunman from Miami.
  • Novak: "Those two killings are tied up like ham and eggs." [17:50]
• Further Complications: Harbor Patrol thinks Bruno’s death was accidental due to a crash; Novak is left as prime suspect in only one murder.

6. Break-In and Phone Records [18:21–19:47]

• Novak Searches Manny Ryan’s Office: Finds phone bills showing calls to Key West—hinting Ryan summoned Bruno from Florida.
• Shares the Lead with Hellman: Novak calls in the clue, but Hellman remains skeptical.

7. Piecing Together Rita’s Past [22:21–23:12]

• New Evidence: Hellman and Novak discover Rita once had a Miami connection to Bruno—her safety deposit box held a Miami newspaper clipping from 1937 about Bruno and "Olga Pryor" (suspected Rita).
  • Hellman: "She had a clipping on Bruno's Weiss from a Miami paper. 1937. Divorce action between Zweiss and Ms. Olga Pryor." [22:33]
• Breakthrough: Novak realizes what's been bothering him about Rita’s murder scene.

8. The Climax: The White Dress [23:12–26:24]

• The Missing Dress: By cross-checking with her cleaner’s records, Novak discovers a missing white dress, which is neither in Rita’s closet nor at the cleaner’s.
• Confrontation in the Dressing Room: Tony Drake enters as Novak and Jocko find the dress. A violent scuffle ensues; Tony, cornered and desperate, is shot.
  • Tony: "I liked you better when you were dumb, Patsy. You don't look good with a Ph.D." [25:08]
  • Tony (final words): "Be a good boy, Patsy. I'm gonna miss you. You were getting to be my favorite hobby." [26:24]

9. Resolution and Revelation [26:42–28:45]

• Novak Narrates the Solution: Tony Drake—once Bruno’s wife—killed Rita to cover up her past. Rita had discovered that Tony, under a different name, was connected to Bruno. Blackmail followed, leading Tony to kill Rita and attempt to dispose of the evidence by involving Bruno and Novak's boat.
• The Telltale Detail: Rita was found wearing jewelry with a dressing gown—contrary to habit—meaning her dress had been removed post-mortem to hide evidence (grease paint).
  • Novak: “When a woman undresses, she always takes her jewelry off first and then she takes off her dress. Rita Malloy didn’t do that.” [27:45]
• Classic Wisecrack: Hellman asks how Novak knows about women’s habits. Novak: “I must have read it somewhere.” [28:44]

---

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Novak’s Dark Humor:
  • “You get to meet the best people in town. There’s only one hooker. You’re liable to wake up some morning dead.” [00:42]
• Jocko on Novak’s Morality:
  • "You move in the twilight zone between good and evil without any predisposition toward either one." [08:22]
• Hellman’s Sarcasm:
  • "You look like a ten to one shot, Novak. And I got my money on you all the way." [10:13]
  • "Smart talk's not going to keep you out of the chair, Novak. Stay handy. We’ve only got a short extension." [19:42]
• Tony’s Last Words:
  • "Be a good boy, Patsy. I'm gonna miss you. You were getting to be my favorite hobby." [26:24]

---

Noteworthy Segments & Timestamps

• Novak’s Office Invasion: [00:42–03:33]
• Discovery of Dead Man on Boat: [04:16–07:09]
• Finding Rita’s Body: [09:13–10:51]
• Questioning at the Nightclub: [11:50–15:42]
• Confrontation & Confession from Tony: [25:03–26:24]
• Novak’s Final Wrap-Up: [27:45–28:44]

---

Conclusion

This episode is a textbook hard-boiled detective story, as Novak follows the clues through dead bodies, waterfront dives, and nightclub dressing rooms, fending off threats from the police, gangsters, and ultimately the real murderer. The fast-paced dialogue and twist ending deliver everything fans of classic radio noir could desire. The dark wit of Novak, the colorful secondary characters, and a tight network of lies and betrayal make "Rita Malloy" a standout episode.

---

For anyone who missed the broadcast:
This summary lets you track the serpentine mystery, relish the memorable zingers, and understand how Pat Novak solves the case—fueled by money, murder, and more than a little irony.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome to Choice Classic Radio where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows. Like us on Facebook. Subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail].

[B]

Pat novak for hire.

[A]

Sure, I'm pat novak for hire. That's what the sign out in front of my office says. Pat Novak for Hire. Down on the waterfront in San Francisco. Billing doesn't mean much. Everybody's got the same act. They're all out to turn a fast buck. And when you're in business down here, everything but murder is a parlor trick. Once in a while, your eyelids get sore from winking it too much. But it's a living. You get to meet the best people in town. There's only one hooker. You're liable to wake up some morning dead. Because around the waterfront you don't need a union card for trouble. It sneaks up and paws you like a wet ghost. I found that out when I met Bruno Zweiss. I closed up early Tuesday night and I went home to catch up on last month's sleep. I don't know how long I was in bed. Must have been about 11 when I woke up. The room was dark and as stale as last year's Christmas candy. I had the goofy feeling that somebody was in the room with me. I was breathing kind of hard and I stopped to have a listen. Somebody was sitting on my bed. Either that or the landlord had put in an echo. I listened again.

[B]

Hello, Novak.

[A]

You're mixed up, friend. I pay the rent here.

[B]

Get your hands away from the light, Novak. Just be a good boy and you can collect your old age pension.

[A]

Now, look, I'm not crazy about waking up with strangers sitting on my bed. Especially if they got baritone voices. Now say your piece and beat it.

[B]

Don't get jumping, mister.

[A]

When your eyes get used to the.

[C]

Dark, you're gonna see a gun about the foot away from your nostrils.

[B]

I want the keys to your boat, Novak.

[A]

Get them in the morning at 25 bucks a smell.

[C]

I want them now.

[A]

Just tell me where they are.

[C]

I'll do the rest.

[A]

Don't get big hearted.

[B]

I don't want cheddar and cocktails.

[A]

I want those keys. Unless you want your face to look like a rump roast, you'll start talking. The keys are in the bottom drawer of the desk.

[C]

That's the boy.

[B]

Gonna borrow your boat a while.

[C]

You get it back by noon tomorrow. There's the boat keys.

[A]

Two of them are the rest. Open the front door of the US Mint.

[B]

Sorry I can't stay around, Novak. You sound like a card slip. Tight, Novak.

[A]

This will have to do for a lullab. He didn't even give me time to pick a dream. I stretched out on the floor as dead as a Philadelphia nightclub. I don't know how long I stayed out of the ball game. Must have been a couple of hours. Because when the phone rang, it was past midnight. I reached over to pick it up. But my hands were as steady as a maple leaf in a hurricane. And my head was big enough to sell by the pound. I finally found it in the dark and started talking. Hello?

[B]

Hello, Novak? This is Joe Pars down at Pier 19. You awake?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

You sound groggy.

[A]

It's a sedative. What's on your mind?

[B]

One of your boats just drifted in. Guess what?

[A]

I don't have to. It's smashed up. And you want to offer me 50 bucks salvage?

[B]

That's right, Novak, you're psychic.

[A]

I'm a patsy. You mean some guns will borrow the boat. A couple of hours ago, came in here. Told me a bedtime story. And took the keys.

[B]

You better hop right down here.

[A]

It'll keep, Joe.

[B]

No, it won't. Hurry up or you'll run a dead heat with Homicide. There's a dead guy in the boat.

[A]

It must be my playmate.

[B]

I don't know. He didn't say. But you better grab a cab and get on down here. There's going to be a lot of questions.

[A]

Sure. If you meet any good answers, save a couple for me. From now on, there was no waste motion. I knew that if Homicide was on the case. That meant Inspector Hellman. He's a real nice guy, if you like his type. I had to do something soon. If I didn't, I'd have about as much chance as a pound of liver at a cat show. So I jumped into some clothes. And I was starting out of the apartment when I missed my wallet. The keys were attached, and that gunsel had taken the whole works. I began to get mad. For 70 bucks, you can get a Scotch hangover. Instead of the kind I had. And if you're lucky, a couple of good memories. So when I drew up at Pier 19. It didn't look like the sunny side of the street. Joe Powers was waiting for me.

[B]

You got the first round, Patsy. Homicide hasn't showed yet.

[A]

I'm full of luck tonight. Where's the boat?

[B]

Right over here.

[A]

Lots of fog tonight, huh, Joe?

[B]

You're walking on it. Well, that is. How's your insurance, Patsy?

[A]

All right, except I'm not carrying any on that dead guy. Who is he, Joe?

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

He's your passenger. You roll him.

[A]

All right. Give me a hand. No, push him over on the other side, will you, so I can get in the pocket.

[B]

Is he the same guy that took the keys?

[A]

I don't know. If he is, he never looked lovelier. Nothing in this pocket. This one's empty except for a comb. He sure spent my 70 bucks in a hurry. Must have thrown in the wallet for a nightcap.

[B]

No identification.

[A]

We should have bought a scorecard. Hey, hey.

[B]

Here on the floor.

[A]

It's a key. Let me see that, Joe. Room 425, Royal Arms Hotel.

[C]

Where is it?

[A]

That's a dive down on Turk street. Well, say hello to homicide for me.

[B]

Oh, you're not bright tonight, Novak.

[A]

Well, I'm not gonna stay around here. They'll pick me up faster than a gin fizz.

[B]

What am I gonna tell em?

[A]

Anything you like, Joe. Shift into freewheeling and let him follow. But I'm not gonna hang around for a pinch. I'm one boat and 70 bucks short.

[B]

Tell it to homicide.

[A]

I don't like manual labor that much. See you later. I started for the royal AR on the way, I picked up the only honest guy I know, a bottle baby by the name of Jocko Madigan. He's a good man, except he thinks it's a waste of the taxpayers money to put alcohol and torpedoes. I hauled him out of the hunt room bar and we walked down the street to the Royal Arms hotel. It was the perfect spot for a missionary. A lobby looked like the first act of rain. There was a pinball machine in one corner, a couple of last year's girls in this year's slacks and a blurry eyed little night clerk. He looked like a well groomed laundry bag. And he gave us the fish eye as we started upstairs. Room 425 was down at the end of the hall. Jocko didn't care if we ever got there.

[C]

Patsy, we have no business coming up here. We're in search of fool's gold.

[A]

We're in search of my 70 bucks.

[C]

Exactly. I view you as my penance, Patsy. The sackcloth for a misspent life.

[A]

If you can shake off that buzz, you'll find out I'm in trouble.

[C]

You'll always be in trouble because you're a patsy. And you're dangerous because you move in the twilight zone between good and evil without any predisposition toward either one.

[A]

Yeah, all right, here it is. 4:25 Nobody home. Let's go in.

[C]

It's housebreaking.

[A]

Now. Look, Jocko, I want my 70 bucks. I'm going in.

[C]

Patsy, sometimes you terrify me. I think you'd pick the lock to the gates of heaven.

[A]

I would if they had my 70 bucks. Come on. The guy's dead down in my boat. We won't hurt his feelings. We'll just nose around a minute and get up. It was a pretty room, if you like dead women on your rugs. She was stretched out in a pale yellow dressing gown as quiet as an April morning and twice as pretty. A dull red scar ran across her temple where somebody had laid an iron shovel. She didn't belong in this hotel because she was wearing a necklace and a bracelet that left a gap in somebody's pocket. And from the ringside she looked all right. Jocko noticed it too.

[C]

She has lots of character.

[A]

Yeah, but where's my 70 bucks?

[C]

She's a nightclub dancer.

[A]

How do you know?

[C]

Her pictures plastered all over the wall there. She's the headliner at el palateo. Ms. Rita Malloy.

[A]

Wonder who the guy on the desk is there.

[C]

Boyfriend, probably. Let's get out of here, Patsy.

[A]

Wait a minute. How about that dead guy in the boat? Where does he fit in?

[B]

I'll listen to that one, Novak.

[A]

Oh, Hellman.

[B]

What happened to the girl? She died laughing at you.

[A]

It's Rita Malloya. Piece of change from the El Palato.

[B]

Got a hat, Novak?

[A]

No.

[B]

Then you're all ready.

[A]

Come on, I'll get your brain lined up. And look at her. She's been dead a couple of hours.

[B]

You're still eligible, Novak. On your way down, you can explain that guy at Pier 19.

[A]

Oh, you can't be that dumb, Hellman.

[B]

I'm smart enough to see you peeking over the eight ball. You look like a ten to one shot, Novak. And I got my money on you all the way.

[A]

If you're gonna make this thing add up, you can't do it alone.

[B]

I'll try.

[A]

Well, that's what Furpo said. So I don't look good on this one. I'll look worse if I leave it up to you. You couldn't find a hangnail if you knew what hand it was on.

[B]

You got 24 hours, Novak. I'm gonna piece things together and then I'm gonna make a pinch, pick out a soft spot. Yeah?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Stay near the phone. If it rings and a man answers, that'll be homicide. Good night.

[A]

Elman was right. I looked like a sure bet for the rotogravira section. I was beginning to run out of silver linings, and I knew it. I didn't have an answer for anything. The guy in the boat was still a stranger, and Rita Malloy was still dead. I was sitting in the middle of a high stake game with a pair of trays when we left the hotel room. I had the funny feeling that there was something wrong back there. I didn't know what. I just knew there was something wrong. The way you feel when you pick up the wrong hat and put it on the position of the body. Those pictures on the desk. I didn't know. But there was one detail that didn't set right. Well, I told Jocko to hang around headquarters, and I started for the El Palateo. It was like all the rest. A little melancholy bar on Mason, a fire trap with a cover charge. The decor looked like early Franco. The floor show was on as I fought my way up to the bar. Excuse me, please. I'm sorry, lady. Can I get through here, please? How about a drink?

[B]

Your idea. What do you want?

[A]

Scotch. Soda or water? Water. We got a nice club here.

[B]

We like it. 80 cents.

[A]

Too bad about Rita Malloy. Yeah. You don't seem heartbroken about it.

[B]

I'm not a mother.

[A]

80 cents.

[B]

Anything wrong? Anything?

[A]

Oh, boss.

[B]

Guy's crying in his beer about Rita Malloy.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

I'm Manny Ryan.

[A]

You own the club? A piece of it. My name's Novak. Call me Patsy. At the moment, the police think I killed Rita Malloy.

[B]

When you go on trial, Mr. Novak.

[A]

I don't. That's why I came down here. To find out which one of your people killed her. I see. She was mixed up to her ears with some thick hoodlum. You Mr. Novak? No. A guy right out of your set. He came rolling in with the tide this morning playing rigor mortis all over my boat.

[B]

Look, Novak, you better go see someone.

[A]

Else to tell your troubles to. I'm a busy man. Well, so am I. Getting out of a murder rap. You knew her, Ryan. In fact, I got an idea you knew her pretty well.

[C]

Let's not talk that way about the dead.

[A]

Your pictures splattered all over her apartment. Were you engaged to her?

[B]

That's one way of putting it.

[A]

You better have a big, fat alibi ready for tonight. Homicide's gonna think you killed her.

[B]

I'm betting on you for the finals, Novak.

[A]

I don't need an alibi. She was a friend of mine. That's why you need one. People just hate their enemies, but they kill their friends. You Better stay out of the public library, Patsy.

[B]

You're not smart enough to understand epigrams.

[A]

I'm smart enough to find out where you were from 10 o' clock until midnight.

[C]

Go ahead.

[A]

Circle around the club, but keep a.

[B]

Drink in your hand. We run for profit.

[A]

I didn't get much out of the doorman. He wanted a first mortgage to talk. But one of the busboys opened up. He told me that Ryan and the girl had brawled the night before. Also that Ryan left the club for about an hour tonight. Put him on the list anyway. But it began to look more and more like a one horse race. I got one other lead. A clarinet player in the band wanted to harmonize with Rita Malloy. But there wasn't much else to go on. And then I spotted the gal who had taken Rita Malloy's job in the show. She was just finishing her number. So I followed her back to a dressing room. When she opened the door, I got a nice warm feeling, like a melted cheese sandwich. And I was looking around for a rope to hang on. She was pretty. Once she said hello, you knew it was time to send in the varsity.

[D]

Good evening.

[A]

For some people. You mind if I come in?

[D]

It's late in the season. I can't be choosy.

[A]

I'm Pat Novak.

[D]

I'm Tony Drake. What do I do? Tremble.

[A]

Talk, mostly. Did you know Rita Malloy?

[D]

Around here, that was an occupational hazard.

[A]

The police think I killed her.

[D]

Did you?

[A]

No. When I got there, they were tearing down the goal posts.

[D]

That's too bad. I'd have been very grateful.

[A]

Something I'd like to try.

[D]

Are you switching the topic, Mr. Novak, or have I been in the big city too long?

[A]

I just want to know who killed her. You got any ideas?

[D]

Nope.

[A]

How about your boss?

[D]

Maybe she was getting a little frayed around the edges.

[A]

How's his temper?

[D]

No worse than a cobra's. He might have done it, but I doubt it.

[A]

Anybody else?

[D]

He was putting in a little overtime with a thug.

[A]

Not a big porky guy with a deep voice.

[D]

I never saw him. I just heard that he was trying.

[A]

Must have been quite a line. Anybody else? How about that clarinet player?

[D]

No play. He was just a salmon swimming upstream.

[A]

I see. Do me a favor, will you, Tony?

[D]

All right. You only get one, so make it a good one.

[A]

They're tailoring me for a trip over the hill unless I show up with a fistful of answers. Now, can you give me a list of all Areda Malloy's friends?

[D]

I can write them all down on a piece of confetti.

[A]

I mean everybody close to her. The people around the club here, the people on the outside. I'll pick it up in a half hour at your apartment.

[D]

At my apartment?

[A]

Yeah, at your apartment.

[D]

All right.

[B]

Get sore.

[D]

I was just inquiring, not complaining.

[A]

All right. One other thing, Angel.

[D]

Yes, Patsy?

[A]

Don't forget to put yourself on that list. Be seeing you. Well, it was good to get out of there. When she started walking towards you, you felt like a shovel full of scrap iron and a Pittsburgh blast furnace. Well, I called up Jocko at headquarters. He didn't seem to be worried about me. He was thirsty. The guy on the boat hadn't been identified yet. The coroner said he died of severe bruises and that Rita Malloy checked out with a fractured skull. I gave Jocko Tony Drake's number and I started for apartment. I couldn't have done better with Aladdin's lamp. She had the list and a bottle on hand. I went over the list with her and then it turned out she had insomnia. The radio was turned down to room temperature. I was working on my fifth drink when the phone rang.

[D]

Let it ring, Patsy.

[A]

I better get it, baby.

[D]

I think you're a no.

[A]

Prison power wouldn't look good on me. Hello?

[C]

Patsy?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Are you busy?

[A]

Well, depends on your point of view. What's up?

[C]

I'm not tearing you away from that list of suspects.

[A]

Let's have it, Jocko.

[C]

They just identified the dead guy on your boat. His name is Bruno Swiss. He's wanted in Miami, Florida. He's a hired gunman.

[A]

Good. Now jump over and see Paul Stangle at the Chronicle. Morg, huh?

[C]

I already have. There's no tie up between Bruno Swiss and Rita Malloy.

[A]

There's gotta be. Those two killings are tied up like ham and eggs.

[C]

Hellman just got a report from the Harbor Patrol. They found a buoy knocked out of place. They figure your boat did it and Bruno got killed in the crash.

[A]

What does that do to things?

[C]

Clarifies them enormously. This way you're going to hang for only one murder. Good night, lover.

[A]

I knew Jocko was right. Hellman could rig me as long as he had only one case to work on. He's a single celled animal. And this was just about big enough to fit into his brain. Well, I left Tony's apartment and I walked over to the El Pala Teo. Must have been about 4 o' clock in the morning. It was still dark enough for me to kick in a back window without Being seen. I headed straight for Manny Ryan's office and I started going through his stuff. It was like trying to separate a ton of salt and sugar dumped in the same bin. I went through most of the drawers, and in the last one I got ahold of something. I grabbed the phone on Ryan's desk and I called Hellman. I wasn't sure, but I figured he could try this one on for size anyway.

[B]

Police headquarters.

[A]

Gimme Hellman and Homicide. They must have put their best men on his trail because they found him inside a half hour.

[B]

Hello? Novak?

[A]

I'm in Manny Ryan's office. He owns the El Palateo. I just rifled his desk.

[B]

That's a minor offense for you.

[A]

I got a hold of last month's phone bill. Guess what?

[B]

It's too high.

[A]

The office put through two calls to Key West, Florida. The last part of this month.

[B]

Four o'. Clock. I'm barely interested. Go ahead.

[A]

Bruno Zweiss hired out as a gunman. San Francisco is a long way from home plate. That means somebody sent for him.

[B]

And you're trying to put the finger on Manny Ryan.

[A]

That's right. That silver frame you picked up at Rita Malloy's. Take a look at the guy in it. That's her boyfriend, Manny Ryan.

[B]

We'll check on it. In the meantime, keep squirming. Novak. You look pretty.

[A]

Oh, you're smooth, Hellman.

[B]

Smart talk's not going to keep you out of the chair, Novak. Stay handy. We've only got a short extension.

[A]

Yellow. Hello, Hellman. Hello? Lupos. Frank, is jock o matic in there? Good. Put him on, huh? Hello, jocko? Now listen. I'm up at manny ryan's place. Yeah, that's right. I'm not sure, but I think that ryan's the. My head must have looked like a jackpot. Everybody in town was hitting it. I rolled over and played dead for about five hours. It feels better when you've had a dress rehearsal. I woke up in my apartment. The sun was streaming through the window and hit the bed. I looked like the muslin counter after a sale. It turned out I was the host and didn't know it. Jocko was sitting at the table having breakfast. The bottle was almost half shot.

[C]

Good morning. How's the other world?

[A]

Can't you leave that stuff alone?

[C]

Do you have a headache?

[A]

Of course I have a headache.

[C]

Well, I haven't, so stop lecturing me.

[A]

How'd I get up here?

[C]

I dragged you here by the heels. I met all the other hucksters on the Way.

[A]

All right, stop being funny and help me up. Hu.

[C]

I am the victim of a common error. You don't like me because I'm not entertaining when I drink. You don't object to my drinking. You object to my lack of wit.

[A]

Oh, shut up.

[C]

Well, it's discouraging to be condemned on moral principle. When it's really a flaw in nature. By the way, I think they're going to arrest you for the murder of Rita Malloy.

[A]

What about Ryan?

[C]

I've recommended Clemens.

[A]

All right, come on. What about Ryan?

[C]

You bungled it. By the time Hellman got to him, he had an alibi all framed. The calls to Key west could have been made by anybody in the club. And Ryan's covered for the time of the murder.

[A]

How about the others?

[C]

They look good too. Your girlfriend, Tony Drake, was gone for a while the night of the murder. Hellman won't bite. She's just sitting there, ready to spring an alibi.

[A]

That's right. With legs like that, she can dig up a cousin.

[C]

You better get worried, Patrick.

[A]

I am. I am. The El Palateo is a dead end street. I don't know where to go from there. That guy Bruno in the boat could help. There's some connection between Bruno's Weiss and Rita Malloy.

[C]

You're the only connection I can think of.

[A]

Yeah?

[B]

Hello, Novak. This is Hellman.

[A]

Yeah?

[B]

You were right about Bruno's Weiss and Rita Malloy. We just went through her safety deposit box.

[A]

I'll bet you handled the money.

[B]

She had a clipping on Bruno's Weiss from a Miami paper. 1937.

[A]

Go on.

[B]

Divorce action between Zweiss and Ms. Olga Pryor.

[A]

Did you look up Olga Pryor?

[B]

That's where we run out of gas. Nobody knew her. We have no description.

[A]

Well, how about Rita Malloy? Any dope on her before 1937?

[B]

I was gonna ask you. You were in the room with her when she died. Don't you know?

[A]

No, I don't.

[B]

I'm disappointed. I figured you to know a little about her habits. You wrote the book, mister. I figured you for an answer.

[A]

Yeah, I got one. And you just gave it to me. Hellman, meet me at the El Palato in a half hour. If you're a real good boy, I'll tell you who killed Rita Malloy.

[B]

Are you gonna be there?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's all I want to.

[A]

Things were falling into place like a fixed roulette wheel. Right from the first. I knew that there was something goofy about the picture in Rita Malloy's hotel room. I wasn't sure. I just knew I had something in the back of my mind. I didn't tumble until Hellman tipped the mitt. And then everything was cakes and ale. I sent Jocko up to room 425 in the Royal Arms Hotel and I told him to get a description of every dress in the closet. I checked at the desk and I got the name of Rita Malloy's cleaners. I ducked over there and I got a list of every dress that she turned in for three months. I met Jocko and we compared the list. Addresses jibbed fine, except for one thing. There was a missing white dress. It had been to the cleaners before. It wasn't there now, and it wasn't in that hotel room. Well, we went over the El Palateo to find it. Jacko didn't want to buy the scheme at all.

[C]

Patsy, I protest the notion of breaking into a lady's dressing room.

[A]

Stop worrying, will you? She's not gonna be there.

[C]

Then it's futile as well as immodest. Besides, how do you know Rita didn't throw away the dress?

[A]

I'll give you better than track odds on that one, Jocko. Here we are. Come look. You take the closets and find that white dress. I'm going through the desk for grease paint.

[C]

You should be going through a woman's closet. It's more in the nature of things.

[A]

Just look, huh? There's enough grease paint here for the whole Iroquois tribe. Did you find anything?

[D]

Yes.

[C]

Watch this.

[A]

Just look for the white dress, Jocko. Hey, what's that in the corner?

[C]

Where?

[A]

Over here.

[C]

I don't see anything.

[A]

Well, down here. Look. See?

[D]

Well.

[A]

Well, that feels good, doesn't it, Jocko? Like a spell of perfect weather.

[C]

Same grease paint.

[A]

Well, it won't take us long to check. Here, you open a couple of these jars.

[D]

Don't forget your apron, Patsy.

[A]

Hello, Tony.

[D]

What are you doing?

[A]

Getting ready to build a fire under you. You're gonna make nice smoke too.

[D]

I liked you better when you were dumb, Patsy. You don't look good with a Ph.D.

[A]

Put away the gun, baby. Remember, this is your second trip to the place.

[D]

Give me the dress, Patsy.

[B]

It won't fit.

[D]

I'll worry about that. Just toss it over by the door.

[A]

Here. I'll do better. I'll bring it.

[D]

Stay where you are, Patsy.

[A]

It's my ticket out, chum.

[D]

A good guy. Patsy, stay out of my way.

[A]

It's your role, baby.

[D]

Patsy. Patsy, please. Stay away from me.

[A]

Come on, give me that gun.

[D]

Please.

[A]

Give me that gun.

[D]

Sorry, pets, that's all I could do.

[A]

Yeah, sure. You want to take a look at her, Jocko?

[C]

Put her down on the floor.

[A]

Yeah. What do you say, Jocko?

[C]

No dice.

[A]

Well, you can't win them all, Tony.

[D]

You play too rough, Patsy.

[B]

You still got a good batting average, Novak.

[A]

Hello, Hellman. You better make a fast pinch.

[B]

She do it?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She got kind of clumsy in the last round, didn't she?

[D]

Not at all, copper. Wait. They had me coming and going. When you're as far back as I am, they don't pick up the option.

[A]

Let's get out of here, Jocko. I'll check with you later, Hellman.

[D]

Be a good boy, Patsy. I'm gonna miss you. You were getting to be my favorite hobby. Yeah, I don't know how you were on the distance stuff, but you. You wish you were something on the sprints.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Be nice to her, copper. She could go in the mud herself. It was blackmail, of course. Tony was once married to Bruno's Weiss. Rita Malloy found out and started to squeeze Tony. Well, Tony wouldn't buy that. So she killed Rita Malloy in her hotel room. She made one mistake. I didn't tumble until Hellman mentioned a woman's habits. And I knew what was wrong with that picture. Back in Malloy's hotel room, it hit me like a discordant note in music. Rita Malloy was lying on the floor in a dressing gown, but she was still wearing her bracelet and necklace. When a woman undresses, she always takes her jewelry off first and then she takes off her dress. Rita Malloy didn't do that. So I took a flyer and decided that somebody had taken the dress off her and put on a dressing gown. Why? Because there was something wrong with the dress. It pointed too much in one direction. Could be a lot of things, but probably grease paint. Tony called Bruno out here. He was supposed to use my boat to dump the body. And when he didn't make it, Tony got scared and lugged away the dress. My 70 bucks. It would have looked better on a fixed fight. Well, Hellman asked only one question. How did I happen to know that when a woman undresses, she always takes off her jewelry first? I must have read it somewhere.

[B]

The Armed Forces Radio Service has just brought you Pat Novak for Hire, starring Jack Webb. Fat Novak is produced by William P. Russo. Jocko Madigan is played by Tudor Owen. Inspector Hellman is played by Raymond Burr. Music was composed and conducted by Basil Adam. Be with us again next week when over most of these same stations we'll bring you Hap Novak or Higher. Fat Novak for Hire was previously released by abc, the American Broadcasting Company, for listeners in the United States and rebroadcast for our men and women overseas. This is the United States Armed Forces Radio Service, the voice of information and education.

[A]

It.