The Adventures of Sam Spade: The Rowdy Dowser Caper 04/20/1951

Summary

The Adventures of Sam Spade: "The Rowdy Dowser Caper" (Aired 04/20/1951)

Podcast: Choice Classic Radio Detectives
Episode Published: August 30, 2025

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Overview & Main Theme

This episode of The Adventures of Sam Spade transports listeners to the rural town of North Tacaloma, where private eye Sam Spade is summoned to investigate a bank scandal with tinges of small-town eccentricity and a hint of mysticism. “The Rowdy Dowser Caper” centers on the disappearance of bank cashier Percy "Uncle Purse" Snatcher and a missing $53,000, unraveling with humor, colorful local characters, and Sam’s signature dry wit.

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Key Discussion Points & Plot Breakdown

[00:53] - [01:54] Opening & The Call for Help

• Sam is contacted late at night by his secretary, Effie, concerned over his recent absence.
• Vic Livingstone, from whom Sam rented a car, is worried and considered sending out a search party.
• Sam humorously claims he’s at “the only spot on earth as yet unvisited by the National Geographic Society… the Vale of Tacaloma” and prepares to recount his story.
• Sam (to Effie): "Set yourself for my saga of a crook's tour of the hinterlands with just a touch of mysticism. Which is why I call it the Rowdy Dowser Caper." [01:48]

[01:54] - [08:24] Introduction to the Case

• Sam receives a mysterious note instructing him to call "North Tacaloma 3." After several transferred calls, he speaks with Wendell Wisby, a former magician and now bank vice president.
• Wisby asks Sam to come immediately, alluding to a crisis besmirching his good name.
  • Wendell Wisby: "A shadow has fallen over my good name." [05:13]
• The problem involves Wisby's uncle, Percy Snatcher, the cashier, who has disappeared along with $53,000 in bank funds.
  • Wisby insists on loyalty: "A Whisby never lived who got away with $53,000." [08:34]

[09:49] - [13:18] Interviews & Local Color

• Sam visits Aunt Wistful, Percy's wife, learning about his increasing stress after the family well ran dry.
• Percy had recently been preoccupied, brought home a law book, and discussed penalties for embezzlement—foreshadowing events to come.
  • Aunt Wistful: "He took to muttering to hisself, saying strange things, coming home from the bank with a frown on his face that stayed there all evening." [10:30]
• On the night of his disappearance, Percy claimed to have "found a fellow to help get down" and was last seen before Aunt Wistful left to care for her sick sister.

[13:18] - [15:05] The Mystery Deepens

• Sam confirms that Percy was seen leaving town but, according to residents and a square dance blockade, did not pass nearby towns.
• Back at the bank, Sam’s hundred-dollar retainer comes into question. Wisby claims he never left the note or money, hinting at an impostor.

[15:05] - [17:41] A New Character: The Rowdy “Dowser”

• At the bank, a strange, flamboyant man in a “beret, bow tie, plaid sport jacket… maroon plus and wool socks with tassels” appears—acting familiar with the bank staff.
• Sam tracks “the dowser” to the Atomic Auto Courts and Restaurant, managed by Charity Fiddle. She reveals the man in question is named Alonzo P. Scoggins and is a “dowser” (someone who finds water), not a local resident.

[17:41] - [21:04] Dangerous Discoveries

• Following clues, Sam finds Percy’s abandoned car and clothing in Clem Clobber’s old barn.
• While investigating, Sam is knocked out and soon awakes to the barn set ablaze with him inside, barely escaping an explosion.
  • Sam: "How long I remained incommunicado I know not. But I awoke presently and with good reason. My pants were on fire." [20:19]

[21:04] - [23:28] Truths, Lies, and the Dowser’s Role

• Sam confronts Alonzo (the “dowser”), accusing him of being involved in the retainer scheme and providing cover for a blackmail shakedown of the real thief.
• Alonzo admits to negotiating a “personal loan” but withholds key details, even as Sam suspects murder.
  • Sam (to Alonzo): "Root had his hand on the till at the bank, a big hand. $53,000 worth. And snatcher found out about it." [22:36]

[23:28] - [25:02] Resolutions & Dowsing Demonstrated

• Alonzo flees but is comically incapacitated by Aunt Charity, who discovers items in his possession, including a “slingshot fork” used for dowsing.
• Charity clarifies that “dowser” meant water-finder, not the man’s name.
  • Aunt Charity: "I never said his name was Dowser. I said he was a dowser." [24:33]

[25:02] - [28:27] Final Reveal

• Wisby, with bravado, demonstrates dowsing on Aunt Wistful’s farm, the rod indicating her flower bed.
• Sam connects the dots—Percy dug in the spot the night he disappeared. President Root’s attempt to buy the now “valueless” farm raises suspicions.
• Sam accuses Root, who confesses to murdering Percy when confronted while the latter was digging. The missing money—and the body—were both buried there.
  • Sam (to Root): "You came down for a showdown on those shortages. He turned up. Found him digging the well here and got a better idea." [28:02]
  • Root: "All right, all right. I killed him. He's right here." [28:10]

[28:27] - [30:08] Aftermath & Closing

• Sam wraps up affairs, noting this caper nudged him into new territory—dowsing.
• Effie reports that Wendell Wisby is set to become the second vice president at the local Moose Hall.
• The episode ends with playful banter about attending the installation together, keeping with Sam and Effie’s warm rapport.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Sam's dry humor:

  • "Set yourself for my saga of a crook's tour of the hinterlands with just a touch of mysticism. Which is why I call it the Rowdy Dowser Caper." [01:48]
  • "My pants were on fire. As a matter of fact, the entire barn was on fire...But when your pants are afire, you only think once." [20:19]

• Aunt Charity’s correction:

  • "I never said his name was Dowser. I said he was a dowser." [24:33]

• Effie's closing line:

  • "I'll wear my sunbonnet and Mother Hubbard. Oh, good night, Sam." [30:03]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:48] – Sam sets the “Rowdy Dowser” caper premise
• [05:13-08:34] – Wisby outlines the crisis and family code
• [10:30-11:26] – Aunt Wistful describes Percy’s state
• [14:33] – The false retainer and deception revealed
• [15:18] – Introduction of “the dowser”
• [20:19] – Sam’s perilous escape from burning barn
• [22:36] – Sam confronts Alonzo/“dowser” with his theory
• [24:33] – Dowser’s true meaning explained
• [28:10] – President Root confesses to the murder
• [30:03] – Effie and Sam’s closing banter

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Summary & Takeaways

A classic Sam Spade tale brimming with rural charm, idiosyncratic characters, and a tightly-woven whodunit. Underneath the story’s dowsing rod gimmick lies a genuine mystery with misdirection, comic relief, and ultimately, a chilling confession. The mix of local color, tongue-in-cheek dialogue, and Sam’s tenacity ensure this old-time radio episode remains a standout for classic detective fans—whether or not you can dowse for water.

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Transcript

[A]

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I love it. I really do.

[D]

Welcome to Choice Classic Radio, where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows. Like us on Facebook. Subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail] the National Broadcasting Company.

[E]

Presents the Adventures of Sam Spade Detective.

[F]

Sam Spade Detective Agency.

[G]

Hello?

[D]

Hello? Hello?

[G]

Hello, Sam.

[D]

At this hour on this network, you were expecting maybe Mary Margaret McBride?

[F]

I've been expecting anything, Sam. After all, to have you drop out of sight like that, leaving not a ripple on the surface for four whole days. Mr. Livingstone is frantic.

[G]

Who?

[F]

Mr. Livingstone, the man you rented the car from. He's ready to send out a search party.

[G]

Aha.

[D]

Sammy and Livingstone with a reverse twist.

[F]

It's no joke, Sam.

[D]

Nothing, huh?

[F]

You. You have no right to worry me like this. It's not fair. Where are you?

[D]

To the only spot on earth as yet unvisited by the National Geographic Society, sweetheart. The Vale of Tacaloma. And don't try to find it on a map, because it isn't. Set yourself for my saga of a crook's tour of the hinterlands with just a touch of mysticism. Which is why I call it the Rowdy Dowser Caper. All right, Murgatroyd, these will do.

[F]

Sam, where are you calling from?

[D]

A tailor shop. I had to leave without my pants.

[E]

For NBC, William Spear, Radio's outstanding producer, Director of mystery and crime drama, brings you the greatest private detective of them all, starring Stephen Dunn in the Adventures of Sam Spade.

[D]

Dum da da dum dum dum when you and I were young.

[C]

Effie.

[F]

Sam?

[D]

Who else are you?

[F]

Decent.

[D]

Decent?

[F]

Well, you said you'd lost your pants, so. Oh, yeah.

[D]

How do they look?

[F]

Well, isn't it a little early for Halloween?

[D]

Ooh, you made a joke. You ready, woman?

[F]

As always.

[D]

Say date filled in to Constable Ollie, Shuttle North Takaloma, California, from Samuel Spade, license number 137596. Subject, the Rowdy Dowser Caper. Dear Ollie, on Wednesday it was when I returned to my office of a fine spring morning to find a note lying on my desk like a big juicy piece of cheese in a mousetrap. Quote, Mr. Spade, call North Taka. Takaloma 3. Unquote. North Taco Loma. Where have I long distance? North Tacaloma 3.

[F]

Yes, sir. One moment. Would you repeat the number, please?

[D]

North Tacaloma 3.

[F]

North Tacloma City Ice Dictionary. That is North Takaloma.

[D]

I'm not kidding. Look it up, girl. Look it up.

[F]

Yes, sir. North Takaloma 3.

[D]

Well, she must have found it in the book because soon we had encouraging buzzes and clicks. Six operators later, we had punched our way north to the farm at Slattery Flat. Then we knocked off for lunch while Slim Slattery repaired the windmill that made the juice for the last lap. At 2:07pm, victory was in sight.

[F]

Yeah, Sam, this is operator nine for the tenth time.

[D]

Oh, fine. How we doing, Millie?

[F]

Sam boy, I am actually ringing North Takaloma City.

[D]

You're good, girl.

[G]

Hello?

[D]

Hello, this is Sam Spade. I have a note here.

[G]

Oh, yes, yes, Mr. Spade. You were out of town when I came. Perhaps you remember me. Wendell Wisby of Oak Tree Lane, North Tacaloma, California. Wendell, I employed you a year ago to find a girl who vanished.

[D]

The magician. You made the girl disappear and couldn't bring her back.

[G]

Correct? You may well ask, Mr. Spade, how anything could be worse than that. Well, this, this is.

[D]

Oh, there, Wendell, There boy. Take it easy.

[G]

I, I can't talk, I, I, I.

[D]

Just can't talk about it. Fine, fine, then write me a nice long letter. You know, this is a long distance call and I.

[G]

No, no, no, no, no. I, I am sorry, Mr. Spade, but this has affected me very deeply.

[D]

Look, you promised you'd lay off the magic, Wendell. How'd you do? Misplaced half a woman this time?

[G]

No, I have given up magic, Mr. Spade. I am currently employed as third vice president of the Second National bank of North Tacaloma. All that? Yes, sir. Oh, my star was rising. My future seemed assured. But now a shadow has fallen over my good name.

[D]

Boot it along, will you, Wendell? This is costing me money.

[G]

I cannot tell you more on the phone. Mr. Spade, you must come at once. It is extremely urgent.

[D]

I see. Well, frankly, Wendell, I have a feeling I'll be tied up. But I left your retainer under your meg. Well, chances are I'll. What was that?

[G]

I just said there's a hundred dollars under your desk blotter for a retainer. I left it when I came with the note. But if you have a collection to make. Suppose.

[D]

Oh, Wendell, that is the collection. And so it befell that shortly before lunch on the following day, I guided my rented hack across the Ford At Clobber Crew Creek, up the high road, through Possum Notch and down into the Vale of Tacaloma where I muscled my way through a flock of geese in the main street and tied up before the imposing stone facade of the Second National Bank. Inside, sitting in front of the door marked Urban Root President, sat a secretary whose facade looked colder and even more imposing than the bank's. She was shriveling, one of the customers, a meek little milk toast in a salt and pepper soup.

[F]

But as I informed you, my good man, President Rood is extremely tied up at the moment.

[G]

Oh, I'm quite aware of that, miss. I wouldn't bother him for the world. But you see.

[F]

I know I don't see. And since you refused to state the.

[G]

Nature of your business.

[F]

Did I refuse? You most certainly did.

[G]

Oh, dear me, I didn't mean to refuse anything. It's just that. Well, it's sort of personal and. May I go in?

[F]

You may sit down until I tell you to go in. Is that clear?

[G]

Yes, ma'.

[F]

Am.

[G]

Yes, I don't. I understand. I don't mind waiting. Don't mind at all.

[F]

And now you, sir. What do you want?

[D]

I have an appointment with Wendell Wisby.

[F]

Mr. Whisby is in conference with the President Root.

[G]

Thanks.

[F]

If you'll sit down, I'll. Just a minute, sir.

[C]

And you must understand, President Root, this is a matter of family honor. I shall.

[D]

Oh, hi, Wendell.

[C]

Mr. Spade.

[D]

I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner, but it's a long haul.

[C]

Well, Mr. Spade is a friend of mine, President Root, from my solid days as a magician. A very competent detective, I might add.

[D]

Well, thank you, Wendell. I see.

[C]

We. We are indeed fortunate to have him with us in this matter.

[D]

Good, good. Please sit down, Mr. Spade. Thanks. You are aware, Mr. Spade, this matter is to be held in strictest confidence. Word must be kept from the depositors at all cost until.

[C]

But remember, President Root, remember the code of the Whisbys. Should worst come to worst, I shall make good. I shall make good if it takes me.

[D]

I understand, Whisby. I understand. Well, mind if I admit I don't? What is it? We Snatcher. Snatch whom? Uncle Purse, our former cashier, Mr. Speed Purse. Snatcher Whisby's Uncle Purse snatcher? What about him? Everything.

[C]

He has disappeared.

[D]

Absconded.

[C]

That is a harsh word, President Root. I would prefer to say he disappeared until we have further proof.

[D]

The money's gone, isn't it? How much money?

[C]

$53,000 from Uncle Purce's accounts. It may be he has absconded, President Root. But we must remember that despite the Snatcher surname, Uncle Purse is a Whisby. And a Whisby never lived who got away with $53,000.

[D]

All right, whisby. He disappeared? Yes. May I ask when he disappeared? Last Friday night, about 9 o'.

[G]

Clock.

[D]

Anyone see him go? Almost everyone.

[C]

His car stalled at Main and Persimmon. Several people saw him trying to start it. He was acting very strangely.

[E]

Oh?

[D]

How is that, Wendell?

[C]

Well, Clem Clobber and Charity Fiddle and several others spoke to him from the curb, but he wouldn't answer them. He didn't say a word to anyone. Which is not at all like Uncle Purr.

[D]

Snatcher Wisby, man to man, would you feel sociable with a satchel full of stolen money on the seat beside you? Well, there you have a point, President Root.

[C]

I can't blame you for the way you feel, President Root. But I must continue to believe the best of uncle purse until Mr. Spade discovers the worst. And in that dismal eventuality, please know I intend to pay off the $53,000 plus interest on the installment plan. $5.37 per week for 48 years. You have my word on it, sir. The word of a Whisby.

[D]

With which solemn pronouncement Wendell marched out, closely followed by me salt and pepper suit. Milk Toast was still fingering his hat fram looking hopefully at Miss Ice Water for the sign. At Wendell's suggestion, I hustle out to the Snatcher homestead for a word with Percy's wife, a timid little woman with her heart in her eyes, known from one end of the valley to the other as Aunt Wistful.

[F]

I can hardly think straight these days, Mr. Spade, so full of puzzlement this thing has left me.

[D]

Of course, Aunt Wistful.

[F]

Have another Dipper side yer, Mr. Spade. Get down. Not you.

[D]

No, thanks, Sam.

[F]

Wistful first, wasn't his self since the well run dry. We had a passel of dry winters here in the valley, you know. But never before this has the well run dry. Perce didn't know which way to turn. Pipe ends two miles down the road. Couldn't afford to bring it in here.

[D]

I see.

[F]

He took to muttering to hisself, saying strange things, coming home from his work at the bank with a frown on his face that stayed there all evening.

[D]

What do you mean, strange thing?

[F]

Oh, I don't recollect very well being. Brought a law book home one night, though, and out of a clear sky he says to me, wishful Honey, do you know the punishment for embezzlement is five to ten years in prison? I asked what he meant by that, and he said he thought it might be a good thing for a banker to know.

[D]

Well, he had something there.

[F]

Twas the night after that he come home all cheerful. Said he figured a way out, found a fellow to help get down. I had no idea what Purse was thinking.

[D]

What fella?

[F]

Urban Root. I suppose it's Urban's bank he was fixing to steal from. But then I got word from my sister ailing over to Fogerty Grove. So Thursday I left, and when I got back Saturday, he'd gone.

[D]

Now did he take his things?

[F]

Mostly.

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[F]

Funny. He did one strange thing for this time of year. He left his corn teeth behind.

[D]

Corn teeth, huh?

[F]

A spare pair of store teeth for corn on the cob. Purcell missing now, the summer coming on.

[D]

Yes, Missy, bless him.

[F]

You know, ever since spring, I've been after Pierce to spade up my flower bed by the window. He did it before he left, now that there's no water to grow things with. I loved him so much, Mr. Spade, in this awful way for marriage to end.

[G]

Get down.

[D]

Well, I started at Main and Persimmon streets and worked south farm by farm. Everyone seemed to have been sitting on his front stoop Friday night because all remembered Per Snatcher driving out on the south road in his 1919 Winton Six up to a point, that is, somewhere between North Tacoloma and Fogarty Grove. I ran out of witnesses, and in Piney Crotch, of all places, the town beyond they could guarantee Purse didn't pass through because the main drag was roped off all Friday night for a square dance. And thus matters stood on the third day when I limped back to the bank. For some reason, a crowd had gathered in the alleyway next door, writing it off as a floating crap game. I walked inside, bowed formally to Miss Ice Water, then plunked myself down at Wendell's desk.

[C]

Oh, Shaw, I just found I miscalculated on the interest. At $5.37 per week, I won't have this paid off until I'm 134. Who knows?

[D]

By then you may even have a wife and children to support. Look, don't you think you were a little impetuous with that retainer?

[C]

What retainer?

[D]

Mine. The hundred dollars.

[C]

Hundred dollars?

[D]

Wendell? The hundred dollars you stuck under my desk bladder when you hired me.

[C]

I hired you?

[D]

You came to my office while I was out of town, Wendell. You left a note for me to call you. I talked to you on the telephone. Well, didn't I?

[C]

Mr. Spade, something is very wrong. I did not talk to you on the telephone at all.

[D]

What?

[C]

I. I thought you were employed by President Root.

[D]

Well, where is President Root?

[C]

I don't know. He stepped out some time ago and there's someone waiting for him in his office.

[G]

Doo doo doo doo, doo doo. Hi, Ms. Ice Water. Oh, tell me, pretty mean. Are there any more at home like you? Well, eat toast.

[D]

But with a difference. The salt and pepper suit had gone beret, bow tie, plaid sport jacket with a racing form sticking out of the pocket. Maroon plus and wool socks with tassels. He took one of President Root's cigars out of his pocket, bit off the end and lit it. Then smiled, or rather leered at Ms. Ice Water.

[G]

Well, honey, I'm sorry. Oh, 23 skidoo, sweet stuff.

[F]

Present friends will be back shortly if you. Ah.

[G]

Don't be a back number, beautiful. But, sir, I. Papa love Mama.

[F]

Well, I don't know what to say. You'll learn.

[G]

Tell Cookie I'll be back, huh?

[F]

Yes, sir. Anything you say.

[G]

Live a little, baby, live a little. Toodle do.

[D]

Golly, golly indeed, Ms. Ice Water. Hey.

[F]

Oh.

[D]

What was that?

[F]

I don't know his name. A friend of peasant roots. He. He's rather attractive, don't you think?

[D]

Only now, as I went outside in his wake, did I see what had caused the crowd in the alleyway. The first sport model convertible in Tulokuma Valley since Wally Reed came through on location. And the first pink one I'd ever seen. Pondering the new Milque Coast, I walked into the drugstore, found a phone book and checked all 25 names. North Tacaloma three belonged to the Atomic Auto Courts and Restaurant Charity Fin proprietress. She was riding herd on a griddle full of lamb chops when I pulled up at the counter.

[G]

How's that again, sonny? Short, you say? Short and scalped on top with a fringe of hair, like so.

[D]

Yeah, and a wicked leer in his eye. That's my man.

[G]

Well, he wasn't wearing no Barrett hat nor plaid coat when I seen him. Salt and pepper suit, it was.

[D]

Yeah, I know. Who is he?

[G]

Well, he didn't register, but they say he's Dowser.

[D]

Dowser? Don't know his first name, do you? Nope.

[G]

Now, where he come from? Stayed in room six till two days ago. Ain't seen him around since.

[D]

When did he come here?

[G]

Let me see now. Codfish balls.

[D]

Beg pardon?

[G]

Oh, that'll be Friday night, late. The funny thing, now, think of it. He come afoot. Not by the road from Fogarty Grove, mind you, but by the trail over the ridge.

[D]

Where does it go to, Aunt Charity?

[G]

Winds up the old clover place. Banda now.

[D]

Oh, thanks. I'll be back.

[G]

You'll be nothing. You just sit right down where you are and you wrap yourself around this. Ain't no growing boy going hiking over the ridge without supper. Clean it up now. Every scrap.

[D]

Yes, Ma. It had been dark about two hours when carrying one of Aunt Charity's best coal oil lanterns, I topped the ridge and looked down on Clem Clobber's abandoned barn, nestling in a grove of ancient oaks at the very foot of the hill. The moon was bright enough to show up the pair of grassy ruts leading from the rear of it down the gully toward the road to Fogarty Grove a couple of miles away. On general principles, I blew out the lantern, then scrambled down the side hill and up to the barn door. I couldn't make out anything inside at first. And then finally something took shape. A dark hulk in the middle of the floor. Stupid me. I lit a match. It was an automobile. To be exact, it was purse snatcher's 1919 Winton 6. His hat and the tweed overcoat everyone saw him wearing Friday night were lying across the front seat. I held the match higher and bent over for a closer look, whereupon Spade and the match went out together.

[E]

You are listening to the weekly adventure of radio's most famous detective, Sam Spade. Three chimes mean good times on NBC. There's fun for you Sunday with two of your favorite families, the Blandings and the Harrises. Mr. And Mrs. Blanding stars Cary Grant and Betsy Drake in the title roles as the proud but somewhat bewildered owners of the famous dream house. The Phil Harris Alice Fay Show Stars Phil and Alice, of course, plus ever helpful Frankie Remley, Brother William and delivery boy Julius. Yes, there are laughs this Sunday and every Sunday with the Phil Harris, Alice fay show and Mr. And Mrs. Blanding's. And now back to the Rowdy Dowser Keeper. Tonight's adventure With Sam Spade.

[D]

I must apologize, Constable, for succumbing once again to the traditional nemesis of the private eye. But the ball facts are simply that I bent over for a closer look at the went in six and was struck a dastardly blow on the rear of the head. How long I remained incommunicado I know not. But I awoke presently and with good reason. My pants were on fire. As a matter of fact, the entire barn was on fire. And I was lying in the tonneau of the Winton Six wearing purse snatcher's overcoat. The door I'd come in was a wall of flames. Likewise the stalls on both sides. But at the rear were a few square feet of rotten siding that hadn't caught yet. Now ordinarily I'd have thought twice, but when your pants are afire, you only think once. So I ran right through it and took a flying header into the creek behind the barn. It was just as well I only thought once since at this moment the flames reached the Winton's gas tank. Hi.

[G]

Good laws almighty. What have you been up to, boy?

[D]

Smoking corn silk behind Clobbery's barn. Matt's got away from me.

[G]

Well, stay right there till I find my goose squeeze.

[D]

No, no, no, no. Later. Aunt Charity. How about the key to six?

[G]

The Dowser fella?

[D]

Yeah.

[G]

Won't need no key, son.

[D]

No door open.

[G]

If he left it open, he's in there now. Barrett hat, plaid coat and a 25 cent segar. Help yourself. Well, hey, Mr. Spade.

[D]

Nerd, right? And you're Doug, yes?

[G]

Yeah, that's right, Dowser. You can call me Alonzo.

[D]

Sit down. No, no, I'll stand.

[G]

Oh, you're lucky you caught me. I was just.

[D]

Just leaving. So I see. I was detained, as you probably know, over at Clover's Barn.

[G]

Detained?

[D]

Okay, Dowser, we'll let that do for the preliminaries. Now, why'd you just try to kill me?

[G]

Kill you? Well, good heavens, man, I. I did.

[D]

Not get careless at a weenie bake, Dowser. I just woke up in the middle of a three alarm fire and I don't like it. As a matter of fact, I'm a little burned up to use the phrase loosely. And I just might kick your teeth in.

[G]

Now, believe me, I haven't been near Clobbers Barn since Friday. I had nothing to do with. With whatever happened.

[D]

Sure, and you had nothing to do with a hundred buck retainer and the phone call from Wendell Wisby?

[G]

Well, as a matter of fact, you.

[D]

Figured with a curious City fellow like me on the premises. Ur Root might shake down easier. Bigger apples from the same old tree, right?

[F]

Yeah.

[G]

All I did was negotiate a personal loan.

[D]

Stop it, will ya? Root had his hand on the till at the bank, a big hand. $53,000 worth. And snatcher found out about it. What about you? How'd you get into the act? The lone, the shakedown. Where's Uncle Purse, Alonzo?

[G]

Out of town somewhere, I suppose. He. Look, I can't tell you, Mr. Spade.

[D]

Purse got as far as the road to Clem Clubbers Barn last Friday night. Or did he?

[G]

No, no, he didn't get that far.

[D]

You know, I'd begun to suspect as much. How far did he get?

[G]

I'm sorry, I can't tell you anymore.

[D]

Root killed him, didn't he?

[G]

No, no, you saw him.

[D]

How come?

[G]

I don't know anymore. Please.

[D]

Come on, let's have a dowser. What'd he do with the body? Root wore the coat and drove Percy's car out of town so everyone would see him. Now, where's the body?

[G]

Let me go. Let me go.

[D]

Dowser.

[G]

Dowser.

[D]

He squirted out of my hands, a watermelon seed, leaving me with a plaid coat, and took off down the line of automic cabins toward the Atomic Restaurant. A nice high knee action for a little guy. And what with my burns and contusions, I'm forced to admit he was widening the gap between us when he rounded the corner of the Atomic Restaurant, making possibly the gravest era of his career. And Charity was rounding the same corner, coming the other way with an armload of wood.

[G]

Hmm. You don't reckon he got himself a brain conclusion, do you, son?

[D]

I don't know, but he's a weak witness, Aunt Charity. A weak witness.

[G]

What you got there?

[D]

Oh, shoebox for fifteen hundred dollars, few odds and ends. And this well, looks like an oversized slingshot fork.

[G]

Slingshot? What do you mean, slingshot?

[D]

Well, who cares? So he whittles. Where'd you get the idea his name was Dowser, huh? Driver's license in his wallet. Alonzo P. Scoggins.

[G]

Who said his name was Dowser?

[D]

You did.

[G]

I never said his name was Dowser. I said he was a dowser.

[D]

Oh. Oh. And what's a dowser, Aunt Charity?

[G]

A guy who finds water for people, that's what.

[D]

Well, that's nice, if you could. Finds water?

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

How?

[G]

Well, I'm no expert, sonny, but as near as I can recollect, you take this here slingshot pork show and.

[C]

Mr. Spade, I. I Can't go through with it.

[D]

Get hold of yourself, Wendell. Remember the code of the Whisbey.

[C]

But this sinister revelation has virtually prostrated me, Mr. Spade. And you must remember it is now over a year since my solid days as a magician.

[D]

Tut tut, Wendell. Stout fellow, stiff upper and further even.

[C]

At the peak of my career, I was only sketchily acquainted with the field of dowsery.

[D]

Hold it.

[C]

There they are. Aunt Wistful is sitting on the back porch with President Root. Mr. Spade, I.

[D]

The code of the Whisbees, Wendell.

[C]

Yes, sir. Let's go.

[F]

President Root, I just can't tell you how full up with gratefulness I am.

[D]

Now, now, Aunt Wistful, don't take on so. It's nothing at all. It's.

[C]

You remember Mr. Spade, President Root.

[D]

Hey, wait. Of course, of course. Hardly seems any time at all since we met. President Root.

[F]

Mr. Spade, President Root's going to buy the farm. Isn't that wonderful?

[D]

Touching.

[F]

And he's allowing me 10,000 on it against the money Purse stole.

[D]

That's a generous offer. I thought so, considering there's no water on the farm.

[F]

Peirce said many times it wouldn't be worth $40 an acre for that water.

[D]

Well, did you say something, Wendell?

[C]

Yes, Aunt Wistful. I have great news for you. It may not be necessary to sell the farm.

[D]

What do you mean, Wendell? We've made a deal here. Maybe the signals are off. For now.

[C]

President Rood, you recall, Uncle Purse, that he'd found a man to solve his problem. Aunt Wistful, I am now ready to step forward and bring it into the open. I am that man.

[D]

You?

[F]

What do you mean, Wendell?

[C]

Since entering the banking field, I divorced myself from magic and the allied dark arts, Aunt Wistful. So I wish to keep my other talents sub rosa.

[D]

What are you talking about, Whisby?

[C]

President Root, I am a part time dowser.

[D]

And he just happens to have his dowsing ride along. Right, Wendell?

[C]

Right. I have reason to believe there is water here. If I can just douse it out.

[D]

Wendell, you're out of here. Shout out. Shut up. Dowse away, Wendell. Dowse away.

[C]

Very well. Now I hold the dowsing fork before me, thus. Then I turn thus.

[D]

Where does it point, Wendell?

[C]

Let me see. Toward Aunt Wistful's flower bed.

[D]

This is ridiculous. Shut up. Proceed, Wendell. Proceed with the dowsery.

[C]

One step, two, three, four.

[D]

Well, the rod's pointing down right in.

[F]

The middle of my flower bed.

[D]

Listen, Aunt Whistle, I'll make that 20,000. $20,000 for the palm.

[G]

Cash. See?

[D]

Not credit.

[G]

Cash.

[D]

20, hold out. 25, 30.

[C]

Right here is where we dig.

[D]

35, 35,000.

[C]

It's already been dug up. Looks as if Uncle Purse had dug a hole and then filled it back.

[D]

Up last Friday night, just before nine o'. Clock. Right. President Root?

[E]

No, no.

[D]

You came down for a showdown on those shortages. He turned up. Found him digging the well here and Got a better idea.

[E]

Please, no.

[D]

I've talked to the guy who saw you do it. All right, all right. I killed him. He's right here.

[G]

Yes, he's right here.

[D]

Which is where you came in, Constable. And since you can take it from here, I shall close as always, with period.

[F]

End of report.

[D]

Right.

[F]

Another triumph, Sam. Another new sphere of effort.

[D]

No field is safe from my talent, sweetheart. You will please preserve it for posterity during the following 15 second announcement.

[E]

Scoot, scoot. Three chimes mean good times on NBC this Sunday. The glamorous and unpredictable Tallulah brings you another hour and a half broadcast of the big show starring Fred Allen, Judy Holiday, Joan Davis, Frank Warren and many more. And this Sunday's Theater Guild on the air production is the Broadway comedy the first Year. Starring in this Theater Guild presentation are Richard Widmark and Katherine Grayson.

[F]

Here it is, Sam.

[D]

Ah, efficient girl. Yeah, yeah. Millie, this is Sam boy. What's up? Oh. Oh, thanks, Millie.

[F]

What is it, Sam?

[D]

They just relayed a message from Fogarty Grove. F. Wendell is being installed as second vice president tomorrow night at the Moose Hall. Oh, he wants me to come. Oh, and bring a girl. Are you game, little one?

[F]

Well, that's one way to get the report to Constable Ollie Shuttle. I'll do it, Sam.

[D]

Good girl. Pack up an emergency ration of sorghum and hominy grits. I'll pull up at your doorstep in the morning at 8:00'.

[F]

Clock. Well, I'll wear my sunbonnet and Mother Hubbard. Oh, good night, Sam.

[D]

Good night, sweetheart.

[E]

The adventures of Sam Spade are produced, edited and directed by William Spear. Sam Spade was played by Stephen Dunn. Lorraine Tuttle is Effie. Also in the cast were Peggy Weber, Verna Felton, Sydney Miller, Alice Wellman, Charles Smith and Nestor Paiva. Script for tonight's adventure by Harold Swanton. Musical scoring by Lud Gluskin. Conducted by Robert Armbruster. Join us again next week, same time for another adventure with Sam Spade. Tomorrow, your Hit Parade plays the hit tunes on NBC.