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Narrator
Welcome to Choice Classic Radio, where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows like us on Facebook. Subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for donating@ChoiceClassicRadio.com.
Ed Herlihy
The Kraft Foods company brings you the Adventures of the Falcon, starring Les Damon.
Narrator
Hello? Yes, this is the Falcon speaking. Oh, Alice, I'm glad you called. You'll have to count me out tonight, angel. I'm busy on a case. Some boy I know is coming over from Sing Sing and I wish he wouldn't. To me it sounds like a bad break.
Ed Herlihy
This is Ed Herlihy, friends, inviting you on behalf of the Kraft Foods Company to listen to the Adventures of the Falcon. You met the Falcon first in his bestselling novels. Then you saw him in his thrilling motion picture series. Now join him on the air when the Falcon solves the case of the vanishing varmint.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Miracle Whip has a flavor so pleasing. Miracle Whip tastes so lively, so teasing.
Miracle Whip, only one of its kind.
Miracle Whip best salad dressing you'll find.
Ed Herlihy
Miracle Whip tastes really good. Not too sharp, not too mild, but just exactly right. And Miracle Whip tastes different, too different from any other salad dressing. Try it yourself.
Narrator
See?
Ed Herlihy
Why, it's America's favorite salad dressing. The one and only Miracle Whip. Now, the case of the vanishing varmint. It's Wednesday evening in Manhattan. An upstate A gentleman named Paul McKenzie is taking life easy. Not that Mr. MacKenzie is lazy. He's not working because he had an argument with the state of New York and unfortunately, he came out second best.
Narrator
All right, Mackenzie, inside. Ah, hiya, Mac.
Business Representative
Drop Deadwoody. I don't know what's the matter with you. Is that the New York paper?
Narrator
Yeah.
Business Representative
Let's see it.
Narrator
Wayne, I'm doing a crossword puzzle. You know, a five letter word for burglar.
Business Representative
You trying to be funny?
Narrator
No.
Business Representative
See? 17 across. Ah, give me that.
Narrator
What'd you do that for? You broke the point on my pencil.
Business Representative
Well, that's just two. Hey, what are you doing now?
Narrator
I'm sharpening the point on the windowsill.
Business Representative
Let's see that.
Narrator
Ah, cut it out, Mac. I ain't hurtin nothing.
Business Representative
Let me see that Part. Hey, that's not bad. You can get it real sharp like that.
Narrator
I always say, concrete is as good as sandpaper.
Business Representative
Is that what you always say?
Narrator
Yeah, when I was a kid. Shut up.
Business Representative
When do you draw kitchen duty again?
Narrator
Tomorrow.
Business Representative
Swab. Why don't you rob me a spoon?
Narrator
A spoon?
Business Representative
That's right.
Narrator
Why should I?
Business Representative
Now, look, Wayne, we're friends. Are we?
Narrator
No.
Business Representative
What's the matter? Can't you take a joke? All I want's a crummy spoon. Who's gonna miss it?
Narrator
I'm not gonna do it.
Business Representative
It's not like I was asking for a knife. I said I'm not. I said you.
Narrator
Well, why do you want it for?
Business Representative
You gotta have a reason for everything. Just get me a spoon. That's all I ask. Hey, Wayne. Wayne, wake up.
Narrator
Well, let me alone, Mac.
Business Representative
Come on, dopey, wake up. Keep your voice down, you understand?
Narrator
Where'd you get that knife?
Business Representative
Remember the spoon you got me last week?
Narrator
Yeah.
Business Representative
Just shows what a little homework will do. I filed it down.
Narrator
How?
Business Representative
The same way you sharpen your pencil. Turned out real keen, don't you think?
Narrator
Cut it out.
Business Representative
Well, pay attention.
Narrator
You gonna bust out? What do you think?
Business Representative
You're crazy Like a fox. And you're coming with me.
Narrator
Oh, no.
Business Representative
Don't get me wrong, Wayne. I'm not that fond of your company. But I need another guy to work this. Now get back in your cart and keep Mom. Don't you open your yap for anything.
Narrator
What are you gonna do?
Business Representative
The less you know, the less you'll have to worry about. Hey, Daniels. Daniels.
Narrator
All right. What's the trouble, Mackenzie?
Business Representative
There's something the matter with Wayne.
Narrator
Huh? Wayne. Wayne.
Business Representative
I don't think he's breathing.
Narrator
What happened?
Business Representative
I don't know. I saw him swallow a pill.
Ed Herlihy
What?
Business Representative
Yeah, about 20 minutes ago.
Narrator
All right, stand back. I'm coming in.
Business Representative
You think maybe he was poisoned?
Narrator
What's the matter with you, Wayne?
Business Representative
Can I help you?
Narrator
Turn him over, Mick.
Business Representative
Don't bother, Daniels. He'll be okay, huh? Too bad I can't say the same.
Narrator
You. You killed him.
Business Representative
Well, what are you waiting for, applause? Let's go.
Narrator
Hello. I'd like to speak to Mike Waring, please. Isn't this Sergeant Corbett? Mike? Who else? How are you, bright eyes? Busy. But I thought you might be interested in this flash that just came over the Teletype. Here, I'll read it to you. Paul Mackenzie and Wayne Thompson broke out of jail tonight at 9:30. May be headed for New York. These men are dangerous. Use Caution in apprehending so. Well, doesn't it mean anything to you? Should it? I think so. Remember the Weber hold up a few years back? You represented the insurance company. Oh, yeah. Mackenzie was the boy we grabbed. As I recall, he was kind of peeved at you. Didn't he make a couple of threats? I was just blowing off steam. Well, I'm glad you feel that way. Frankly, I don't. Well, it's been nice talking to you, Mike. Hope I get to do it again sometime.
Ed Herlihy
Just a second.
Narrator
Just a second. Yes? Hello, Harris. Mackenzie.
Business Representative
Shut the door.
Narrator
Huh? Oh, yeah.
Business Representative
What's the matter, Harris? You act like you're seeing a ghost. It's your old boss, remember?
Narrator
Yeah, but I heard on the radio that.
Business Representative
What?
Narrator
In a car with you and what's his name?
Business Representative
Wayne?
Narrator
Yeah. Went off a drawbridge near Sing Sing.
Business Representative
Well, I wasn't in it. We separated as soon as we got over the walls. Was there anything else?
Narrator
No.
Business Representative
What about the gun? I knife that.
Narrator
They say he's going to pull through.
Business Representative
I guess this is my lucky day.
Narrator
How did you get to town?
Business Representative
What do you think?
Narrator
Well, you certainly didn't come by the Super Chief.
Business Representative
I rode the rods. Give me some soap. I want to wash you up.
Narrator
Yeah, sure, man. What do you hear from Ruth? Ruth?
Business Representative
Ruth Nelson, stupid.
Narrator
I haven't seen her in months.
Business Representative
Mac, I told you to keep an eye on her. Emirates.
Narrator
Yeah. Well? Well, what?
Business Representative
What do you got to say for yourself?
Narrator
Oh, be reasonable, Mac. I couldn't follow Ruth around.
Business Representative
Why not?
Narrator
Well, let's skip that for now. There's lots more important things to do.
Business Representative
Such as?
Narrator
Such as getting you out of the country.
Business Representative
Now don't be a champ, Harris. I'm staying right here.
Narrator
What? You're out of your mind.
Business Representative
That's the trouble with people who don't spend any time in jail. You don't appreciate your own hometown. You forget the attractions. I got a beautiful girl in New York and about a quarter of a million in bonds.
Narrator
Yes, I know, Mike, but. Good.
Business Representative
Cause I want them both here by 5 o' clock tonight. Let me look at you, Ruth.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Have I changed much, honey?
Business Representative
Nah, you look better. Never. Okay, Harris, beat it.
Narrator
But I thought you wanted.
Business Representative
What's the matter? Don't you understand English? Go on, blow. Find yourself somewhere else to flop tonight.
Narrator
All right, Mac, but be careful, will ya?
Business Representative
Stop being such a worry wart. I'll be okay.
Narrator
Come here, baby.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Gosh, Mike, wonderful to have you back.
Business Representative
You miss Papa, huh?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yes.
Business Representative
Why don't you keep in touch with Harris?
Miracle Whip Announcer
You know how I always felt about him.
Business Representative
Ah, he's okay. Oh, hey, that reminds me. I was so tickled to see I forgot to ask what were the bonds.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Bonds?
Business Representative
Yeah, before I went up.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Oh, those.
Well, I didn't bring him along.
Business Representative
Why not?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, when Harris first told me you were here, I thought he was kidding.
Business Representative
Well, you can see he wasn't. Want you to pick him up the second thing in the morning.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What do you mean second thing?
Business Representative
Mike Waring still around?
Narrator
Who?
Business Representative
The private deck they call a falcon.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I don't know.
Business Representative
Well, first thing tomorrow, Ruth, you find out and make an appointment for me.
Narrator
What for?
Business Representative
You'll find out when I talk to Wearing. You know how I hate to repeat myself.
Narrator
That's funny.
Business Representative
He doesn't answer.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Maybe. Maybe he's gone out for a while.
Narrator
Yeah.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What are you gonna do, Mac?
Business Representative
Make myself comfortable while I wait. I think this one ought to do the trick. Well, what do you know? It's the old man hasn't lost his touch, eh, Ruth?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Now listen to me.
Business Representative
Inside.
Miracle Whip Announcer
But honey.
Business Representative
I said inside. Now what were you gonna say?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Mike Waring's not gonna like this.
Business Representative
That'll teach him not to break dates with yours truly.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Guess you're right.
Business Representative
What do you mean, you guess?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Aren't you sure I only meant.
Business Representative
Wait a minute. Did you make an appointment with Waring for me?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Why, of course I did.
Business Representative
Then how come he isn't here?
Miracle Whip Announcer
I don't know.
Business Representative
You're lying.
Miracle Whip Announcer
All right, so I am. I never called Waring. No, honest, Mac. I was only thinking of your welfare.
Business Representative
I'll bet you would. Next time I tell you to do something, you do it. I don't need any masterminding.
Miracle Whip Announcer
So that's the thanks I get.
Business Representative
You kidding? I got nerves for you, sweetheart. Even at Sing Sing, I heard a couple of stories about you.
Miracle Whip Announcer
They're about me and. And Lucas. They were lying.
Business Representative
What's that name again? Lucas. Come on an alone Talk up, Ruthie. I'm going to know the scar.
Narrator
I have to break every bone in your lovely body.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I'm warning you, Mac. Stay away from me.
Business Representative
You're warning me?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Go on, laugh, you big ape. But you put a finger on me and I'll put a finger on you. And we'll see who yells louder.
Mr. Waring?
Narrator
Yes, that's right.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I've been waiting for you out here since 10:30.
Narrator
Well, that's a switch. They generally wait inside.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Pardon?
Narrator
Skip it. You're Susan Andrews. Well, what's on your mind, Ms. Andrews?
Miracle Whip Announcer
It's Mrs. Andrews. I'm staying at the Renard Apartments.
Narrator
Well, you've still got something on your mind.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, couldn't we talk inside?
Narrator
Sure. Go right in, Mrs. ET. On second thought, stay right where you are. Now stop it.
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Miracle Whip Announcer
Is he dead?
Narrator
Well, if he isn't, he's as reasonable a facsimile as you can get with two slugs in the brain.
Miracle Whip Announcer
That's Paul McKenzie, isn't it?
Narrator
Who?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Paul McKenzie. One of the men who broke out of jail yesterday.
Narrator
How would you know?
Miracle Whip Announcer
I recognized him from his pictures.
Narrator
Funny, I never would have.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Who are you calling?
Narrator
The police. Do you mind?
Miracle Whip Announcer
What's the matter?
Narrator
The line has been cut. All right, Mrs. Andrews, you stay right here till I get back.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yes, but what about mackenzie?
Narrator
I wouldn't worry. In his condition. I think we can prevail upon him to hang around, too. Oh, you're out of your mind, Mike. Mackenzie was in the car with Wayne when it went off that drawbridge near Sing Sing. Have they discovered the bodies yet? Saga? Well, no, I tell you, they never will. At least not Mackenzie's, because he's right here in my place. Mrs. Andrews? Mrs. Andrews? Looks like nobody's home. I don't get it, Corbett. I left her standing right, but. Holy smoke. What happened to the body? What body? I told you, mackenzie's was lying right there near the sofa. Look, Mike, if you got nothing better to do, you got to believe me. Corbett, why would I make up a yarn like that? That's what I'm wondering. But whatever your reason is, it better be funny. I tell you, the line was cut. Seems to be all right now. They must have patched. Oh, sure, sure. Where was this Mrs. Andrews Living? At the Reynard Apartments. That's Fleming 1222, isn't it? Now, go ahead. But you're Wasting your time, Sergeant. Whoever removed MacKenzie must have taken her along for the ride. She won't be in. I know. There's only one question in my mind. Whether she ever was. Look, are you calling me? Keep quiet. Maynard Apartments. You got a Mrs. Susan Andrews registered there?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Hello?
Narrator
Mrs. Susan Andrews?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yes, that's right.
Narrator
Hey, there is such a person. She's there now. Let me talk to her. Wait your turn.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Hello? Hello?
Narrator
Hello, Mrs. Andrews, this is Sergeant Corbett of the police. Did you ever hear of a private detective named Mike Waring wearing.
Miracle Whip Announcer
No, I don't believe I have.
Narrator
Oh, then you weren't at his place this morning.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, I don't see how I could be. Your call just woke me.
Narrator
Well, thank you very much, Mrs. Andrews. You know any more funny stories, Mike? I'm just dying to hear them. Well, I'm still waiting. Mike. How was the idea of the gag? I tell you, it was no gag, Sergeant. Well then how do you explain it? I can't. I just don't get it, that's all.
Ed Herlihy
Oh, if you're referring to your sandwich, Mike's coming right up.
Narrator
Oh, Ed.
Ed Herlihy
And just wait till you see what else Ed's luncheonette has for you. Can you guess what it is?
Narrator
Oh please, Eddie, I'm in no mood to play guessing games. I'm not able to think on an empty stomach. Oh, what puzzles me is how you're able to think on an empty head.
Ed Herlihy
But Mike, look, just try to guess. Think of cool, shimmering beauty. A real attractive dish.
Narrator
A beautiful tomato. Where is she?
Ed Herlihy
No, no, Mike, not a girl. It's a real tomato filled with cream cheese. A nice cool salad for summer.
Narrator
All right, fine, bring it on. I'm hungry. But.
Ed Herlihy
But guess what else I do with this salad to pep it up?
Narrator
You probably use a salad dressing.
Ed Herlihy
Mike, you're psychic.
Narrator
Yeah, he can figure out everything but the case he's working on.
Ed Herlihy
Oh, but he's right, Sergeant. This salad needs a dressing the pep it up. So I add a swell peppy flavor by using Guess what.
Narrator
Look, if I say the right thing, will you make me queen for a day?
Ed Herlihy
Well, I can't do that. But you know the answer. It's miracle whiff, Mike. Boy, that stuff is wonderful. It's just right, you know, not too sharp or too mild. Just right.
Narrator
What more could you ask for? Yes. Huh? Guess what more I could ask for? Oh, gosh, I don't know.
Ed Herlihy
Here's a delicious tomato salad filled with cream cheese and topped with America's favorite salad dressing, Miracle Whip. A salad dressing that tastes so different, folks call it the one and only. Now what more could you possibly ask for?
Narrator
Just one thing, Eddie. Can't you guess?
Ed Herlihy
No, no, Mike, I give up.
Narrator
What is it? Will you please bring the salad and sandwich? What are you waiting for? Get on the ball. Oh, sure.
Ed Herlihy
Mike, why didn't you say so?
Narrator
Hey, you better get on the ball yourself, Mike. You claim MacKenzie was in your place this morning. I tell you he was. Yeah, that's what you've been telling me all day. Don't you think it's time now that you furnished a little proof?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yes.
Narrator
Hello, Mrs. Andrews. Remember me?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Mr. Waring.
Narrator
Yes, angel. Mr. Waring, won't.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Won't you come in?
Narrator
Try and keep me out. All right, now, what's this all about?
Miracle Whip Announcer
What's what all about?
Narrator
Listen, Susie, I'm in no mood for evasions. You saw me find Mackenzie's body this morning.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I.
Narrator
Yes, you. I want to know why you lied about it on the phone.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I don't know what you're talking about.
Narrator
Look, I don't often strike a woman, but in your case.
Miracle Whip Announcer
No, wait a minute. Wait.
Narrator
It's coming back to you now, Mr. Waring.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Why don't you forget about it? Make believe it never happened.
Narrator
Have the cops think I'm crazy for the rest of my life. Oh, no. Now, what went on in that apartment after I left?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Please.
Narrator
Look, I'll make it easy for you. You had a visitor, didn't you?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yes.
Narrator
Who was he?
Miracle Whip Announcer
He didn't tell me his name.
Narrator
Well, what did he tell you?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Just to keep my mouth shut. Otherwise, never mind.
Narrator
I can imagine what that otherwise was. Then what happened?
Miracle Whip Announcer
He picked up Mackenzie's body and disappeared.
Narrator
No, no, it wasn't as simple as that, Susie. You don't walk around the streets of New York with a dead body on your hands. Might cause talk. How did he get rid of it?
Miracle Whip Announcer
He had a car waiting near the service entrance.
Narrator
And you followed him?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, I.
Narrator
Now, don't lie, Susie. You must have. What was the license number?
Miracle Whip Announcer
I didn't think to copy it down.
Narrator
But I'm warning you, angel.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Wait a minute. Let me get my purse. Was 8L463 all right?
Narrator
Thank you, Susie. You've been a great help. I think I can take it from. Well, I'm looking for a gentleman named Larry Harris. What do you want? My name is Mike Waring. That still leaves me in the dark. I don't see why. Harris. You were up to my place this morning, weren't you? Where'd you get that screwy idea? You own a 51 Nash, license number 8L463, don't you? No. You better inform the license bureau. According to their records, the car belongs to you. What if it does? It was parked near the service entrance to my building today. Oh. What did you do with Mackenzie's body. Well, strictly between us worrying, I don't see how that's any of your business. Now, that's where you're wrong, Harris. When someone uses my place for a slaughterhouse, it concerns me vitally. Yeah, I suppose when you look at it that way, you've got a beef. Would 500 bucks take care of it? Only if I can take it out in information. Now, look, fellow, let me give you a little tip. Nobody's been hurt except Mackenzie. There's no skin off your nose. Forget it. And if I don't, someone's liable to get sore at you. Who might that be? I don't like to mention names, but it might be me. Oh, no, you don't.
Ed Herlihy
Oh, my arm.
Narrator
What's the matter, Harris? Can't you stand a little pressure?
Business Representative
Cut it.
Narrator
I'm wearing you. You're breaking. Well, that ought to convince you that I mean business. Now, what was your tie up with Mackenzie?
Ed Herlihy
You can go.
Narrator
Oh, come on, spill it. We were friends.
Business Representative
He was.
Narrator
Hold up. Here. Last night, why did he want to see me? I don't know. You sure? I. I tell you, I don't know. Well, would you know what happened to all that money he had stashed away? What money? Mackenzie was serving time for a payroll robbery. I was the one who sent him up. But we never recovered the loot. I never saw a penny of it. Then who did? He. He spent it all on his girlfriend before they caught him. That sounds like a physical impossibility. It was close to a quarter of a million dollars. You don't know this girl? No, but I'd like to. What's her name?
Business Representative
Ruth Nelson.
Narrator
All right. Just one more thing. Did you kill mackenzie and then go back to your place and remove his body? What do you think? I don't know. Maybe Ruth Nelson can help me arrive at some satisfactory answer.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Waiter.
Narrator
Waiter. May I help you, madam?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Yeah, I'd like a. Wait a minute. You're no waiter.
Narrator
I still wouldn't mind serving you. Buy you a drink?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Aren't you afraid I might have a jealous boyfriend?
Narrator
If you have, you probably know the best way to handle him.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Sit down.
Narrator
Thanks. Away to two scotch and sodas here. Right away, Mr. Waring.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What did he call you?
Narrator
Why? Did it sound insulting?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Your name, Waring.
Narrator
Well, I was keeping it for surprise.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Ruth, beat it.
Narrator
Now, what kind of hospitality do you call that? I didn't turn you out when you dropped in at my place.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What do you mean?
Narrator
Weren't you there this morning with Mackenzie?
Miracle Whip Announcer
No.
Narrator
You'll have to do better than that, Ruth. I couldn't forget that perfume. Voodoo, isn't it?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Max send you over to apologize?
Narrator
Why should he?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Didn't he tell you he slapped me around?
Narrator
What did you do, walk out?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Wouldn't you?
Narrator
Well, I wasn't going steady with him, so it's hard to say.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, where does he get off accusing me of two timing him with Arnold Lucas?
Narrator
Weren't you? No.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Mac doesn't believe me. He can check it with Arnold. You'll find him at the Granger Hotel.
Narrator
I kind of doubt that. Incidentally, Ruth, you wouldn't happen to know why mackenzie wanted to see me in the first place?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Didn't he tell you he couldn't?
Narrator
Very well, angel. When I first saw him, he was dead. Dead? A murder, to be exact.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Is this a gag?
Ed Herlihy
Oddly.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Listen, wary. Arnold had nothing to do with this.
Narrator
Who said he did? Well, I. I thought if you did. Ruth, that's good enough for me. I'll be seeing you, angel. Who is it? Telegram for Arnold Lupus. Would you be kind enough to sleep it under the door? Sorry, mister. You got a sign for it? Just a moment. Alone. You are not from the Western Union? Well, I tried to enlist, but they wouldn't have me. Who are you? Waring is the name. Mike Waring. What can I do for you, Mr. Waring? It's a long story, Lucas. You mind if I make myself comfortable while I tell it? Please do. Thanks. May I offer you something? Just a couple of answers. You see, I'm a private detective.
Business Representative
How interesting.
Narrator
Yes, you get to meet a lot of dull people that way. I'll never guess how I got in touch with you. Perhaps not. Ever hear of a man named Paul Mackenzie? Once or twice. He's dead. How sad. That's very. But you can dry those tears, fella. I think I know where to locate his murderer. And how did you accomplish that? Well, I had several fine leads. An automobile license plate led me to Larry Harris. Harris? I don't believe I've had the pleasure. No, but you do have a mutual friend. Ruth Nelson. Oh, yes. She's a wonderful gal, Lucas. Glad you appreciate her fine qualities. I'd be an ingrate if I didn't. After all, she gave me you.
Miracle Whip Announcer
But not for teeth.
Narrator
Oh, hello, Ruth. What are you doing here?
Miracle Whip Announcer
You're the boy who knows all the answers.
Narrator
Judging from that gun in your hand, there could only be one.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Never let it be said that you can't put two and two together. Hello, Arnold.
Business Representative
Darling.
Narrator
It was so nice of you to drop in.
Miracle Whip Announcer
It was A pleasure.
Narrator
Well, if I'm in your way, folks, come back here.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Waring.
Narrator
I just thought you two might like to be alone. Plenty of opportunity for that later. I don't know, Lucas. You better act fast before the police grab you.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I don't think there's any danger of that.
Narrator
You're wrong, Ruth. I've got your boyfriend dead to rights.
Miracle Whip Announcer
And that's where you're wrong, Waring. Because in a couple of minutes he'll have you dead. Period.
Ed Herlihy
Well, Ruth, pointing a gun at him really poses a question as to Mike's future. Let's hope he has the right answer. But I don't need anybody to point a gun at me to give you the one right answer to the question of what to use as a dressing for salad. The answer, Miracle Whip.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Miracle Whip has the flavor so pleasing Miracle Whip tastes so lively so teasing Miracle Whip only one of its kind. Miracle Whip best salad dressing you'll find.
Ed Herlihy
Miracle Whip is the only one of its kind because it's a different type of salad dressing made from a secret craft recipe. Miracle Whip combines the best qualities of old fashioned boiled dressing and fine mayonnaise. So it's truly distinctive and delicious with a flavor millions of folks call just exactly right. Try it, won't you? One taste will tell you why it's America's favorite salad dressing. The one and only Miracle Whip. Now back to the Adventures of the Falcon. Only a minute has passed since Ruth Nelson made her a dramatic entrance into Arnold Lucas's apartment with a gun and promptly aimed it at Mike Waring's head. And now, as we find the Gay Trio, Ruth seemed determined to get down to business.
Miracle Whip Announcer
All right, Waring, you've got any final requests, now's the time to make them.
Narrator
Now, Ruth, you know you're not serious about this.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, you bet.
Narrator
Well, I've got nothing against you.
Miracle Whip Announcer
No, but you got plenty against Arnold. Who told you he was wanted in Los Angeles?
Narrator
No one. So you figured it out all by yourself, Mr. Waring.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Oh, he's a smart one, Arnold. Wouldn't take him long to guess Mac went to his office. It could only be for one reason. He wanted Waring to make a deal for him with the police.
Narrator
He's wasting his time, Ruth. They never would have accepted it.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Why not?
Narrator
Mackenzie owed the police plenty for the payroll robbery and a little extra something for that jailbreak. Lucas would really have to be wanted pretty badly for the cops to forgive and forget.
Miracle Whip Announcer
You never can tell.
Narrator
No, that's true enough.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, now that you know it all, what do you intend to do about it?
Narrator
It's up to you.
Miracle Whip Announcer
All right, you are. And since it's my move, I better move faster.
Narrator
Come on. Drop it.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Let go.
Narrator
Final. Get out of the way.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I didn't mean it.
Narrator
Let me take a look at him. What's going on here? Oh, come in, Harris. You're just in time. I heard a shot.
Ed Herlihy
What happened?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Can't you see I didn't mean to kill him?
Ed Herlihy
Cheer up, Ruth.
Narrator
You didn't.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What?
Narrator
No, it's just a flesh wound. But you're a very careless girl.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Anyone would have done the same in my place. I had to protect him.
Narrator
Yes, I guess you can't blame her, Waring. When a gal goes for a guy, there's nothing she won't do. Even try to cover him when she's seen him commit murder. Well, who should know that better than you, Harris? Meaning what? Meaning you're the guy she's in love with. You're the one she's shielding.
Miracle Whip Announcer
What? What are you talking about?
Narrator
I'm sorry if I let the cat out of the bag, Ruth, but when it comes to murder, I'm just a great big bladder mouth. Hello, Susie. Remember me?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Mike.
Narrator
I hope it's not too late, but I came over to regale you with the saga of my triumph.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Oh, I heard all about it on the radio. But coming anyway.
Narrator
Oh, thanks.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I heard on the radio Harris killed Mackenzie.
Narrator
You heard right.
Miracle Whip Announcer
But why? I thought they were friends to the end.
Narrator
Only Harris saw to it that Mackenzie's end came a lot sooner than it normally would. When Mackenzie went to jail, he left a quarter of a million dollars worth of loot with his girlfriend, Ruth Nelson.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Oh, and she and hers. Well, where does this Arnold Lucas fit in?
Narrator
Oh, he was the patsy in this little affair. Ruth led Mackenzie to believe it was Lucas who was his rival, when all.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Along it was his boy Harrison.
Narrator
That's it.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, what put you on the right track?
Narrator
Ruth. She was the one who sick me onto Lucas originally. And then she volunteered the information that he was wanted in Los Angeles. And on top of that, she tried to kill Lucas in front of me.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I thought that was an accident.
Narrator
Don't be silly. That gal knew what she was doing. Why do you think I had such an easy time disarming her? Does that answer all your questions? Mm. Well, good. Now we can start on mine. I didn't have time to ask you before, but what were you doing in front of my apartment so early in the morning?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Well, as I told you, I wanted to see you. What about getting the evidence for a divorce.
Narrator
Well, I don't generally handle that kind of work, Susie. But for you, I might make an exception. What would you tell me about your husband?
Miracle Whip Announcer
Oh, he's handsome, charming and cultured. Everything a woman could want.
Narrator
Well, now, wait a minute. You sound like you're still in love with the guy.
Miracle Whip Announcer
I am, huh?
After I saw you this afternoon, I thought it over and called him. He should be here any minute.
Narrator
Well, that's nice, Mike.
Miracle Whip Announcer
It was all my fault.
I made a mistake. I was just counting on him to call me first.
Narrator
Well, don't feel too badly, Susie. We all make mistakes. I was counting on something too.
Miracle Whip Announcer
Mike, where are you going?
Narrator
Home. Good night, Mrs. Andrews. Rich delicious chocolate flavored malted milk.
Ed Herlihy
Sounds mighty good, doesn't it? And it is too. But listen to this. You make it in your own kitchen. That's right, make it yourself with Kraft Wonderful Chocolate flavored malted milk. Here's how simple and easy it is to do. Make a tasty paste of some Kraft.
Narrator
Malted Milk and a little milk in the bottom of a tall glass. Fill that glass with chilled milk, stir it again, and there you have it, A delicious Kraft Malted.
Ed Herlihy
And because it's full of all the.
Narrator
Food values in milk, it's nourishing as well. So why not enjoy a craft malted often? Just get a jar of craft chocolate flavored malted milk from your grocer tomorrow.
Ed Herlihy
The Case of the Cautious Cousin. The Case of the Cautious Cousin. That's the title of next week's Adventure of the Falcon. When Mike Waring learns that when a family fortune is in the balance, the scales can be tipped toward murder. So be sure to listen at the same time next week to another exciting Adventure of the Falcon, brought to you by the Kraft Foods Company. The Adventures of the Falcon are based on a famous character created by Drexel Drake, produced by Bernard L. Schubert, written tonight by Eugene Wang and directed by Richard Lewis.
Narrator
Music was by Arlo.
Ed Herlihy
Les Damon was starred as the Falcon, but Chuck Webster as Sergeant Corbett. This is Ed Hurling. He's speaking for the Craft Foods Company.
Narrator
Here.
Ed Herlihy
It pays to be ignorant. Tonight on NBC.
Podcast Summary: Choice Classic Radio Detectives | The Falcon: Vanishing Varmint
Podcast Information:
In this episode of The Falcon: Vanishing Varmint, listeners are transported back to the bustling streets of 1950s Manhattan, where private detective Mike Waring, known as The Falcon, navigates a complex web of deceit, betrayal, and murder. Hosted by Choice Classic Radio, this rendition stays true to the classic detective storytelling that fans cherish, complete with period-specific advertisements seamlessly integrated into the narrative.
Mike Waring (The Falcon): A sharp and resourceful private detective dedicated to solving intricate cases.
Sergeant Corbett: A diligent police officer collaborating with The Falcon in the investigation.
Paul McKenzie: An upstate gentleman with a troubled past, recently escaped from Sing Sing prison.
Wayne Thompson: McKenzie's associate, whose suspicious behavior raises red flags.
Ruth Nelson: A woman entangled in the case, holding crucial information about the events unfolding.
Arnold Lucas: A character linked to the central mystery, whose actions are pivotal to the plot's progression.
Setting the Scene (00:00 - 05:00) The episode opens with a lively exchange between MacKenzie and Wayne Thompson, highlighting tension and underlying motives. MacKenzie, annoyed by Wayne's request for a spoon, alludes to darker intentions, setting the tone for impending conflict.
The Mysterious Death (05:00 - 12:00) Sergeant Corbett contacts The Falcon after hearing news of McKenzie's death, reported to have ingested poison. The Falcon, skeptical of the official report, reminisces about a past case involving McKenzie, hinting at unresolved tensions and potential motives.
Investigating Clues (12:00 - 20:00) The Falcon delves deeper, conversing with Mike Waring, a supposed associate, and Ruth Nelson, whose alibis don't quite add up. Suspicion mounts as inconsistencies in their stories emerge, particularly regarding the whereabouts of McKenzie's body and the missing information about bonds.
Confrontations and Revelations (20:00 - 26:00) Tensions escalate when Ruth Nelson confronts The Falcon with a gun, leading to a heated exchange. The Falcon skillfully disarms her, revealing her protective stance over Arnold Lucas. Dialogues hint at hidden agendas and past relationships, deepening the mystery.
The Unraveling Mystery (26:00 - 30:00) In a climactic confrontation, The Falcon pieces together the puzzle, uncovering Ruth's involvement and her manipulation of events to cover Larry Harris's tracks. The interplay between characters reaches its peak as secrets are exposed, and The Falcon asserts his dominance in solving the case.
Trust and Deception: The episode masterfully explores themes of trust and deception, illustrating how characters cloak their true intentions behind seemingly innocent interactions. For instance, Wayne Thompson's request for a spoon serves as a deceptive facade for his sinister motives (03:30).
Wayne Thompson: "Now, look, Wayne, wake up." (04:09)
Moral Ambiguity: Characters such as Ruth Nelson exhibit moral ambiguity, shifting between victim and perpetrator, which keeps listeners engaged and guessing until the very end.
Ruth Nelson: "Is he dead?" (12:16)
Detective Ingenuity: The Falcon's methodical approach and keen observational skills highlight the quintessential traits of a classic detective, emphasizing intellect over brute force.
The Falcon: "You'll find out when I talk to Waring. You know how I hate to repeat myself." (07:04)
Interpersonal Dynamics: The complex relationships between characters, especially between Mike Waring and Ruth Nelson, add depth to the narrative, showcasing how personal connections can influence professional investigations.
Ruth Nelson: "I'm staying at the Renard Apartments." (11:32)
The Falcon on Trust:
"He spent it all on his girlfriend before they caught him." (19:43)
Ruth Nelson's Defiance:
"Wait a minute. Did you make an appointment with Waring for me?" (10:05)
The Falcon's Determination:
"I'm not gonna do it." (03:35)
The Falcon: Vanishing Varmint delivers a captivating narrative that intricately weaves together suspense, character development, and classic detective work. Through Mike Waring's relentless pursuit of the truth, listeners are treated to a masterclass in storytelling that honors the rich legacy of old-time radio detectives. The episode not only entertains but also invites listeners to ponder the complexities of human nature and the thin line between right and wrong.
As the mystery unfolds, Choice Classic Radio ensures that each twist and turn keeps the audience engaged, making it a must-listen for aficionados of the Golden Age of Radio. Whether you're a longtime fan or new to the series, this episode encapsulates the charm and intrigue that have made The Falcon a timeless detective figure.
Advertisements: Period-specific advertisements for Podbean and Miracle Whip are artfully integrated, enhancing the authenticity of the 1950s setting without detracting from the main narrative.
Production: Produced by Bernard L. Schubert, written by Eugene Wang, and directed by Richard Lewis, with music by Arlo and starring Les Damon as The Falcon and Chuck Webster as Sergeant Corbett.
Stay tuned for next week's episode, The Case of the Cautious Cousin, where Mike Waring delves into a new mystery involving a family fortune teetering towards murder. Subscribe to Choice Classic Radio on YouTube and follow us on Facebook to never miss an episode of your favorite old-time radio detectives!