The Saint: Dossier on a Doggone Dog 09/24/1950

Summary

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Choice Classic Radio Detectives: The Saint – “Dossier on a Doggone Dog”

Originally aired: September 24, 1950 | Podcast Date: April 5, 2026
Host: Choice Classic Radio | Simon Templar (The Saint) portrayed by Barry Sullivan

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Episode Overview

In this witty and briskly paced episode, Simon Templar—better known as The Saint—takes on an unusual case that begins with a lost Pekingese and quickly escalates into a tangled web of jewel theft, mistaken identity, murder, and family secrets. Set in an opulent mansion, “Dossier on a Doggone Dog” blends clever banter, eccentric characters, and classic detective intrigue as The Saint sniffs out the truth behind a missing dog, vanishing jewels, and an increasingly suspicious household.

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Key Discussion Points & Episode Breakdown

1. The Dog and the Setup

[00:00–04:50]

• Simon Templar is introduced returning to his apartment where he’s taken in a lost Pekingese (whimsically named “Minerva” by Simon, but soon revealed to actually be “Ming Toy”).
• He enlists his loyal cab driver Louie to help return the dog to its home, suggesting they follow her to see where she belongs.
• Louie’s comic skepticism:

  "Oh, that I should live to see the day when the Robin Hood of modern crime is nursemaid to a pooch." (Louie, 02:15)

2. A Wealthy House and a Case of Mistaken Identity

[04:50–07:13]

• The dog leads Simon and Louie to an extravagant mansion where the staff and family are already frazzled due to recent events.
• Initial confusion over the dog’s identity and the mention of missing jewels sets the stakes.
• The family suspects Simon of being a jewel thief; Ernest, the son, pulls a revolver:

  "Mother, call the police. Tell them we've got the thief." (Ernest, 06:22)

3. Meet the Allardyces

[07:13–09:29]

• Introductions to the Allardyce family (eccentric millionaires, including the aptly named Mr. and Mrs. Allardyce and their son Ernest).
• Their pet dog, Ming Toy, was recently dognapped, and family jewels have disappeared.
• Quick banter ensues:

  "If it's Allardyce, it's nuts!" (Mr. Allardyce, 07:59)

4. Stevie and the Inner Circle

[09:29–11:02]

• Simon and Louie encounter ‘Stevie’, a clever, sharp-tongued local kid who claims knowledge about the missing jewels and the events at the house.
• Stevie’s resourcefulness and skepticism add a new layer to the mystery:

  "You and me can do business... you help me latch onto the ice, and we'll split the reward." (Stevie, 10:16)

5. Back to the Mansion – Dog Disappears Again

[11:02–14:18]

• Simon and Stevie return to the mansion where Ming Toy has vanished once more, much to the family’s distress.
• Key clue: Stevie sees butler Fitch shaving Ming Toy in the garage, hinting at a secret message or something hidden.

6. The Clues Unfold—Strange Happenings, Strange People

[14:18–16:16]

• Simon retrieves the now-shaved—but otherwise unharmed—Ming Toy.
• Odd behavior among the household staff and a lack of trust within the Allardyce family raise Simon’s suspicions.
• The butler Fitch’s recent hire and strange actions come under scrutiny.

7. Murder at the Mansion

[17:00–20:19]

• Simon discovers the butler Fitch dead in the kitchen—stabbed—raising the stakes to murder.
• Classic hard-boiled wit:

  "He's been cleared the hard way." (Simon Templar, on Fitch, 20:01)

• Mr. Allardyce’s dismissive and comedic take on his family woes:

  "Anybody ever tells you it’s a picnic being a millionaire, don’t you listen! ... Just be sure you can afford it." (Mr. Allardyce, 16:21)

8. The Saint’s Theory—A Clever Red Herring

[20:19–22:05]

• Templar intuits that the dog’s kidnapping was a ploy to scapegoat an outsider for the jewel theft, but the real thief is likely within the family.
• Simon attempts to learn more about Fitch but is brushed off; father faints when Simon reveals Fitch’s murder, tipping his hand about knowing the family is involved.

9. Chase and Resolution

[22:05–24:19]

• Louie and Templar chase down a car possibly connected to Ernest and Stevie.
• Simon unravels the plot: Ernest, saddled with gambling debts, orchestrated the thefts and murders to cover his tracks, using the dog and butler as red herrings.

10. Stevie’s Heroics and the Case Closed

[23:39–25:17]

• Stevie subdues Ernest with some “judo”—having been told by Ernest another wild story about a “secret message” tattooed on the dog.
• Stevie’s proud offer:

  "Judo? Sure. My brother was in the marines. He taught me." (Stevie, 24:53)

• Simon concludes the case, and Stevie offers to teach him some moves—comic banter resumes.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Louie’s skepticism on being a nursemaid to a dog (02:15)
• Ernest’s ham-handed attempt at being a tough guy:

  "Pull up your hands. I'm sorry I waited, Ernest." (06:20)

• Allardyce Company Slogan:

  "If it's Allardyce, it's nuts." (07:59)

• Mrs. Allardyce’s melodramatic take:

  "Oh, Mama's little baby kins isn't all right." (05:29)

• Stevie’s streetwise partnership proposal:

  "You and me can do business... you help me latch onto the ice, and we'll split the reward." (10:16)

• Butler Fitch’s “peculiarity”:

  "Excellent. One peculiarity, that's all. Likes to shave dogs. So what? We can't all be perfect." (16:14)

• Stevie’s description of judo takedown:

  "Judo? Sure. My brother was in the marines. He taught me." (24:53)

• Simon’s Deadpan wit:

  "He's been cleared the hard way." (20:01, about Fitch's murder)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:00–04:50] – Simon finds and returns the Pekingese
• [05:22] – Simon enters the mansion, confusion about the dog and missing jewels arises
• [07:13–09:29] – Louie and Simon encounter Stevie
• [10:15–11:02] – Stevie approaches Templar about the “ice” (jewels)
• [12:19–14:18] – Stevie witnesses butler shaving the dog
• [17:00–20:19] – Butler is found murdered
• [22:05–24:19] – The chase for Ernest and Stevie through the woods
• [24:53] – Stevie’s judo move on Ernest, resolving the confrontation

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Tone & Style

The episode weaves together fast-talking, sardonic exchanges and classic detective suspense, with Simon Templar’s refined wit balancing Louie’s blue-collar banter and the Allardyce family’s comedic dysfunction. The presence of young Stevie infuses streetwise humor and a playful mood even as the stakes rise.

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Conclusion

“Dossier on a Doggone Dog” is a classic Saint romp through rich mansions, mistaken identities, family secrets, and even animal antics. Filled with memorable lines, slapstick, and a couple of clever twists, the episode highlights Barry Sullivan’s sharp performance as Simon Templar and offers a treat for fans who enjoy both clever mysteries and vintage radio comedy.

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Transcript

[A]

Welcome to Choice Classic Radio where we bring to you the greatest old time radio shows like us on Facebook, subscribe to us on YouTube and thank you for [e-mail] Vincent Price, who is usually heard at this time as the Saint, has been delayed in Paris tonight. By arrangement with Metro Goldwyn Mayor, you will hear Barry Sullivan in the role. Mr. Sullivan can currently be seen with Lana Turner and Ray Milland in A life of her own. The Adventures of the Saint starring Barry Sullivan. The Saint. Based on characters created by Leslie Charteris and known to millions from books, magazines and motion pictures, the Robin Hood of modern crime now comes transcribed to radio starring Hollywood's brilliant and talented actor Barry Sullivan as the Saint. And Mr. Templar. Well, Louie, that's what I call service. Parked right in front of my apartment. Waiting for you, Mr. Templar. I was Hop would be desirous of a hack that I am, Louie. Well, where to, Mr. Templar? Well, I'm not quite sure. You see, I have a problem up in my apartment. What's your name? Well, I call her Minerva. Another dish and a jam. She won't tell me the way she cries. I have an idea something's wrong. How long has she been at your place? Oh, a couple of hours. And still crying or. Mr. Templar, you're losing your charm. I think she wants to go home. You're definitely losing your charm. I'd like to take her home. Well, she lost her charm too. Only I don't know where her home is. But now that you're here, I'll untie her and maybe she can find her own way. Mr. Templer. Louie. Louie. She's a dog. Oh. Well, why didn't you say? I found her this morning. I've never seen her around here before. So I didn't want to turn her loose. Because if she can't find a way home, there's no telling what'll happen to her. So what are you gonna do? Turn her loose. But you just said that you'd. How's where you come in? We'll follow her in your hack, see where she goes so we can keep her out of trouble. Oh, that I should live to see the day when the Robin Hood of modern crime is nursemaid to a poop. Remember the saying, Louie, do unto other dumb animals what you would have others do unto you. Besides, she's cute. Yeah. What kind is she? Pekingese. I thought you said it was a dog. Louie, that's unkind. Sorry, I didn't mean it. Stay put, Louie. I'll get Minerva and let's see where she takes us. Hey, Minerva has fancy taste. This is a real expensive neighborhood. And this is a real expensive trip. We've been following her for over an hour. You know any better way to spend your money, Mr. Templer, than giving it to me? Offhand, I can think of a couple. Say, Minerva's turning in at that gate. Yeah. Cute little shack she picked. I bet it doesn't have over 40 rooms. You think she really lives there? Or she only dreaming? And we soon find out. Louie, turn into the driveway and park. I'll take her up to the house. If she does belong here, there will no doubtless be a reward. And if there is no doubtless drooling Louis, your cut is already on the meter. So either way, you can't lose. I'm not making out so awful good on it, Mr. Templer. Only one fare, only one tip and more than an hour. Where's the profit? Why, Louie, the conversation. Of course. What's the matter? What's the matter? You want down? Well, you're out of luck. Or maybe you're in luck because when I pick up a young lady, I usually show her a good time. So if it turns out you don't live here. Why, yes, sir. Oh, hello. My name's Simon Templar. Ah, yes. I'm sure madam will be delighted you've come. You're sure? Of course. Right this way, sir. Why should madam be delighted I've come? You surprised me, sir. I never heard that modesty was one of your outstanding characteristics. You seem to know a lot about me. Doesn't everybody? If you'll pardon the levity. I'll pardon the levity, but not the evasion. Evasion? I asked you why madam should be delighted I've come. Is it because of Minerva? Minerva, sir, this. Oh, you mean Ming Toi. Do I? I guess I do. I should have known. Ming toi. Naturally, madam will be delighted about the dog. But what I was particularly referring to were the jewels. Have you brought them also? Jewels? Apparently you haven't. I hope you'll pardon these questions, sir. The kitchen help expects it of me, and I like to have something to report. No, unless you communicate from the front. Which reminds me, where is the front? Around this next bend, sir, in the east wing. Ah. If I'd known the hall was this long, I'd have asked Louis to bring in his cab. My feet hurt. It's not much further. Well, let's be thankful for small favors. What was that? Does anyone in this house take singing lessons? No, sir. And that Was a scream. And it came from in there. Did you scream?

[B]

Who are you? I'm Mean Toy, darling. Come to mama. Give it to me, young man.

[A]

Here.

[B]

Oh, Mama's little baby kins isn't all right.

[A]

She's all right, but something else isn't. Somebody screamed.

[B]

I know I did. There was someone peering through that window. Was it you?

[A]

Hardly. I was in the house.

[B]

Well, you have no business barging in here unannounced.

[A]

Well, it seems, lady, that I run faster than your butler. I thought you were in trouble.

[B]

I was startled and I saw somebody. Better go investigate. Oh, Mingy angel did a measurement.

[A]

What is it, madam? Is something wrong?

[B]

There's a prowler outside the window. Go see who it is, please.

[A]

Yes, madam.

[B]

Now, you, young man. Do you have my jewels?

[A]

I was wondering when we'd get around to that. I'm also wondering. Mother, are you all right? I heard you scream.

[B]

Yes, Ernest.

[A]

Who's he? Me? Yes. What are you doing here? I just came to return your door. Return?

[B]

Yo. Here she is. Mama's a little precious.

[A]

Say, her collar's off.

[B]

That's right.

[A]

How did you know she's our dog? I didn't. Well, then why. Hey, wait a minute. I'm waiting. Pull up your hands. I'm sorry I waited, Ernest.

[B]

I didn't know you owned a revolver.

[A]

Lucky I do. Mother, call the police. Tell them we've got the thief. Oh, great. Somebody screamed. Was it you? Is it?

[B]

Yes, dear, but it's all right. I saw somebody at the window. Fitch is looking into it.

[A]

Ernest, what the devil are you doing? Haven't I told you not to play with guns? I'm not playing, Father. This is the thief. So? Does he have the jewels? I haven't searched him. Then how do you know he brought back Ming Toy? Huh? Oh, yes. Morning, Ming Toy. Don't bite me, you little monster. Just a minute, Father. She doesn't have her collar, so how could he know she was our dog? She told me. We're just wasting time. Mother, will you please pick up that phone and call the police? It won't do any good. The line's been cut. See? What? Thanks for looking down. Hey, what are you doing?

[B]

Stop immediately.

[A]

I'll take the gun. Here, let me help. That's better.

[B]

Such violence.

[A]

Yeah, it's very good exercise, Ernest.

[B]

You gave the young man the gun. Why?

[A]

I asked him so nicely. Now, will somebody please tell me what's going on around here? As if you don't. As if I don't. Just who are you anyway? Young Fella. Simon Templer. And you. You don't know who I am? Should I? I, sir? McJ Allardyce. Fancy that. Nuts. I beg your pardon? I said nuts. So you did. As in bolts. Nuts and bolts. We manufacture them. You've heard of Allardyce nuts? Yes, aren't they? What's that? The whole family? Beg pardon? Skip it. Our slogan. If it's Allardyce, it's nuts. That's what I said. There's no nut like an Allardyce. Well, this could go on all day. Father, I'm sure Mr. Templar didn't come here to talk business. Why did he come? To return Ming Toi. And now that I've been so warmly thanked, I'll just run along. I hope you won't mind my taking your revolver with me, Ernest, as a souvenir when I'm safely out of reach in northern Tibet. Say, I'll send it back. Well, Chiho. All right, Louie, let's get out of here. What took you so long, Louie? You wouldn't believe me if I told you. Yeah? Try me. No, it's no use. I don't believe it myself. Did you get a reward? Reward? Louie, I'm out of there. Who could ask for anything more? Now, let's go. Hey, just a minute, Mr. Temple. Now what? Somebody is hiding in them bushes and watching us, you see? Oh, yeah. That's probably who Mrs. Allardy saw at the window. Well, get started, Louie. You ain't gonna investigate? It's probably only a man eating a gorilla. None of our business. This is not like you. Mr. Templet's not like you at all. As a matter of fact, I'm not exactly feeling myself at the moment, so don't be too surprised. But where is your spirit of adventure, huh? What may lurk in them bushes? Excitement. Thrills. Who knows? I know you do. Yeah, I can see him in your rear view mirror. It's a kid. Kid? About 10 years old. A kid. Let's get out of here. Excitement. I could stand mystery. I could stand adventure. But, kids, I got a nephew. What's wrong with this thing?

[B]

Hi.

[A]

Hello, kid.

[B]

Hey, what's the matter, mister? Won't you start?

[A]

Oh, sure, sure, she'll start. I'm just trying to run down the battery so the lights won't work on a kind of. I don't like night driving.

[B]

Wise guy.

[A]

What's your name, sonny?

[B]

It ain't sonny.

[A]

Well, what is it?

[B]

What's it to you?

[A]

See what I mean there? Yeah. Look, fella, if you don't tell Me? Your name? I'm going to have to call you my little man. How would you like that?

[B]

You win. It's Stevie. What's yours?

[A]

Simon.

[B]

Simon?

[A]

Which Simon Templer.

[B]

A saint.

[A]

Yeah, Stevie.

[B]

Hey, wait a minute. You may not be him at all. How do I know this ain't a bluff?

[A]

You don't. Well, hold.

[B]

It's worth a chance. Because if you're the real saint, you and me can do business.

[A]

What sort of business, Stevie?

[B]

Oh, I read a lot of books about detectives.

[A]

Yes, I gather.

[B]

Well, we ought to make a good partnership, you and me. You help me latch onto the ice, and we'll split the Reward.

[A]

The ice?

[B]

50 grand worth, and that ain't peanuts.

[A]

Stevie, suppose you tell me about this jewelry. Just when was it taken?

[B]

You don't know?

[A]

No, no.

[B]

You're not the saint.

[A]

Believe me, Stevie, the saint doesn't know everything.

[B]

Why'd you come here?

[A]

To return Ming Toy.

[B]

Who are you trying to kill?

[A]

No, that's on the level.

[B]

Look, mister, I happen to know you couldn't return Ming Toi. See?

[A]

What do you mean, I couldn't?

[B]

Never mind. But I know.

[A]

If you don't believe me, ask Louie here. I thought her name was Minerva. You're always such a help, Stevie. Why do you say I couldn't return Ming Toi?

[B]

I'm not talking.

[A]

I don't get it. Ah, I see the look in your eye, Mr. Templer. The mystery's beginning to needle you. Stevie. Stevie. If I prove I brought back Ming Toy, will you tell me why you said I couldn't?

[B]

Sure, you won't prove it.

[A]

Wait here, Louie. I'll probably hate myself in the morning, but I'm going back to the Allardyces. Come on, Stevie.

[B]

Come in.

[A]

Excuse me, madam. Mr. Templar is here again with the gardener's boy.

[B]

The gardener's boy?

[A]

Yes, madam.

[B]

But he can't bring that urchin into the house.

[A]

I'm very sorry, madam, but he has. Shall I show them out?

[B]

No, show them in. I'll tell him myself.

[A]

Very good, madam. You may come in, Mr. Templer. Thank you. James Fitch, sir. I stand corrected. Well, hello again, Mrs. Halliday.

[B]

Really, Mr. Temple, this is impossible. Bringing in that. Good heavens. He's the face at the window I was just attacking. Oh, I should have recognized him at the time. Oh, Mr. Templar, you're wonderful. Positively wonderful. First Ming Toy, and now the prowler. Fitch had no luck whatsoever. Simply none. You're an amazing man. Sit down. Have a chocolate.

[A]

No, thanks.

[B]

Yeah, thanks.

[A]

If you don't mind, we'd like to see Ming. Why? I forgot to say goodbye to her. Oh, very well.

[B]

Mingy comes her mother. Mingy. Now, where is that animal? She was here, right? Just a moment ago. Mingy. Mingie.

[A]

Did you call mother?

[B]

Oh, Ernest, have you seen Ming Toi?

[A]

No. I thought she was in here.

[B]

Well, she's not.

[A]

Don't tell me she's disappeared again.

[B]

Also, it would seem, vanished into thin air. My poor. It's a baby gone for real, mister. Now what have you got to say?

[A]

Say, Stevie, I'm speechless. Oh, hello, Louie. Mr. Templar. How come you're answering the door? They don't have no butler. He's not around. Strange. No dog, no butler. Well, what do you want, Louie? I just come to see what's keeping you this time. My media's getting busy going round and round. Ming Toy's missing again. We're looking for her. It's a big house. She's a little dog. Why don't you just forget the whole thing? Because, Louie, it doesn't make sense. She ought to come when we call, or at least bark. Well, what do I do? Go take another nap? No. Maybe. Louie.

[B]

Hey, mister.

[A]

What is it, Stevie?

[B]

I take it all back. You are the same.

[A]

Well, that brings all this on.

[B]

I saw a mink toy.

[A]

You did?

[B]

Yeah. Bend down slight and whisper. This is top secret.

[A]

Go ahead. I'm bent.

[B]

Fitch has her in the garage.

[A]

What's he doing, giving her a shampoo?

[B]

No, he's shaving her.

[A]

Shaving her?

[B]

What's an electric razor?

[A]

Well, let's go get her. Come on, Louie. Oh, no thanks, Mr. Templar. You and the kid go. Me? I'm going back to the hack for another nap. I can dream nightmares that make better sense than this. Solo. Now, Stevie, when we get near the garage, let's be quiet. We don't want Fitch to hear us.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Hello there. Oh. Oh, it's Ernest. I've looked all over the grounds, can't find her. It's all right. Stevie's founder, your butler, has her in the garage. But I just saw him go back to the house. Oh, with Ming Toy?

[B]

No.

[A]

Why did you take her to the garage? I guess to improve her appearance. What? Well, come on, we can soon find out. Ernest, what do you know about your butler anyway? Not much. He's only been with us a couple of weeks. What sort of references did he have? I don't know. Ask father. He engaged him. I will. And then I would like to ask you some questions. I'm still not satisfied in spite of mother. Look Fitch has the dog, not me. I know, but.

[B]

Hey. Hey.

[A]

What? Wait a minute. What is this? What? Right there, crouching by that bush. Can that be Ming Toy? By gosh, it is. And she's stripped clean. She's been shaved. She looks like a damp sock.

[B]

Come here, Ming Toy.

[A]

She just sits there shivering. I think she's embarrassed. Here, I'll get her. Come here, mink toy. Cold. Well, don't worry. I'll buy you mink. Here she comes. I thought that would do it. It works every time. Be careful, don't drop her. Oh, don't worry, Ernest. I shall guard Ming Toy with my life. Well, come on. What's the matter? My legs are giving out again. Oh, it's your little out of condition, I guess. Mother.

[B]

Ernest, have you found my treasure?

[A]

Yes, Mother, we found.

[B]

Oh, that's wonderful.

[A]

Give it a mother. Templar. Yeah? Here.

[B]

Thank you. She's naked.

[A]

It seems your butler is a frustrated barber.

[B]

What?

[A]

Where's Father Templar? Wants to talk to him about fish.

[B]

He's in the back study. But I. I don't understand.

[A]

That makes it unanimous. Look after your mother, Ernest. She's had quite a shock. Meanwhile, I'll go see if your father can help explain why Ming Toi has been forced to become a stripteaser. Don't bother me, Templar. Don't bother me. I've got enough on my mind. Son who gambles away every penny I give him, a wife who charge accounts away, even pennies I don't giver. Believe me, young man, anybody ever tells you it's a picnic being a millionaire, don't you listen? Take it from me before you make a million. Just be sure you can afford it. I'll make a note of that. But about Ming Toi. Last night the dog is kidnapped or dog napped or whatever you call it. The wife throws such a tizzy it takes three pills to get me to sleep. This morning the wife jewels are gone. Another tizzy. Policeman. Insurance adjusters are. Now you look. I don't care if the dog has been peeled, see? I don't care. I've got enough on my mind. But maybe it all ties together. The dog is stolen, the jewels are stolen. I can add 2 and 2. Templar, I don't need your masterminding. The dog was stolen first so the thief could break in later without the dog barking. Think I couldn't figure that out? No, no, I think you could. And it's possible the thief thought so too. What's that? I have a hunch the robbery was the work of some Member of this household. Nonsense. And the dog napping was just a red herring to throw you off the track. To make you think just what you did think, that it was an outside rather than an inside job. Get out of here, Templar. Get out of here before I throw you out. I'd just like to ask you about fish. Okay, fine. Butler. Excellent. One peculiarity, that's all. Likes to shave dogs. So what? We can't all be perfect. Now get out of here, Templar, before I have him shave you. And it may be closer than you like. Oh, hello Ernest. Hello Temple. Learn anything from father? Yeah, yeah, I learned he has a temper. Oh, he's in one of those. Uh huh. So if I want to learn about Fitch, I'll have to learn it from Fitch himself. Only trouble is I can't find the kitchen. Is there a map of this place anywhere? It's down this way. Come on, I'll take you. I'll talk to you anyway. Thanks. So you don't have signposts. How's your mother? Sniffing smelling salts and ring toy. Taking it? Better than mother. Just keep her away from mirrors, she'll be all right. Look, Templar, I said I want to talk to you. We're talking. I want to talk about you. My favorite subject. It's all very well, you're pretending you want to help, but how do we know? Are we almost there? My legs are giving out again. It's right in here. Take us in the kitchen through the butler's pantry. Good. Don't bother calling him Ernest. He can't hear you. Huh? Look behind that table. Is he dead? Extremely.

[B]

Please, dear, I can't talk now. I'm so upset about Ming Toi.

[A]

Oh, hang Ming toy.

[B]

Jonathan. Ally.

[A]

Oh, look, I'm trying to tell you something. That man Templar, he's getting ideas. I don't like it. He's been snooping around here. The first thing we know.

[B]

Well, all we have to do is to be nice to him.

[A]

Nice to him? Confound it, Isabelle, I'm going to. May I come in? No. Templar, I thought I told you to get the blazers out of this house. Oh, is that what you told me? I've been trying to figure it out, but you were so incoherent. Now see here, if you want me to go, I'll be glad to. But I thought I ought to tell you about your butler first. Yes, yes, I know. You think he's a thief. Very well, I'll have the police. You're wrong, Mr. Allardyce. I don't think he's a thief. He's been cleared the hard way. What? Somebody murdered him. Ernest is calling the police now. Murdered him? Yep, with a knife.

[B]

Oh dear. And good butlers are so scarce these days. Ah, Jonathan. Mr. Templar. What's happened to Jonathan?

[A]

Looks like he's fainted.

[B]

Oh, what'll we do? Get me some water.

[A]

Get it yourself. I can't wait.

[B]

Can't wait. Well, you can't leave me now.

[A]

I've got to, or there may be another murder.

[B]

No, no. Come back here later.

[A]

Mrs. Ellaby.

[B]

Oh, Mr. Templar. Oh, Fitch. Oh, no, he's somebody. Please. Oh, dear. Oh dear.

[A]

Louie. What now? Mr. Templar, have you seen Stevie? If I do, there's gonna be a murder. If we don't, there's gonna be a murder. Stevie? Yeah. I'm glad to hear it. You know what that kid done? He scrambled the wires in the engine while I was snoozing. That's why we wouldn't start before he was detectiving. Louie. We were possible suspects and he wanted to foil our getaway. Well, wasn't that cute? No, no, I'm not joking. His life is in danger. I'm not surprised. If I can't find Stevie, I'll have to find Ernest. Who's he? Allardy's son. I wonder if he's the one drove away just now. Drove away? Did someone. Yeah, yeah. Car just went down the other drive. Have you got your wires on scramble? Oh, yeah. All right, Louie, let's go. It headed this way. That's all I know. And you don't know if Stevie was in the car? I don't know who was in the car. I didn't see. He must be. It's the only thing that makes sense. Now what? The road branches three ways. Which way do we go? Oh, oh, oh. There we are. They went that away to the left. How do you know? There's fresh tire tracks. The others are old. Oh, yeah. And step on it, Louis. Okay, pull in your ears. Here we go. But I would still do like to know what's going on. Louie, look out for that turn. Close your eyes. Your pray, Mr. Templar.

[B]

Here we go.

[A]

Got your eyes open, Mr. Templer? Yeah, yeah, we made it. Oh, good. Then I can open mine. Louie. Louie. Is that the car you saw coming out of Allyces? Looks like. That's good. But I hope we're not too late. Nobody in it? No. Yeah, There's a path into the woods. Come on. Yeah. Hurry up, Louie. Right through here. I'm afraid to call the kids. I'd still like to Know what's going on? Well, as I see it, Louis. Yeah? Ernest ran up a gambling debt and his papa wouldn't pay off for him. Oh. At any rate, Papa was griping about Ernest gambling. Ernest, I take it as Allardyce Jr. Yeah, that's right. Ernest had to get money, so he drove Ming Toy away from home and put her out of the car. Then he swiped the family jewels and the missing dog. Made it look like an outside smart guy. Junior, what makes you think he's gonna knock off the kid? He's already knocked off the butler. Oh, yeah? How do you know it was Ernest which knocked off the butler? Because when I told Allardyce, he fainted. And he didn't faint out of great feeling for the butler. Fellow had only been with him a couple of weeks. He fainted because he knew his son was guilty of the robbery. And he realized his son was also a murderer.

[B]

Hello, Mr. Templer.

[A]

Stevie.

[B]

Where'd you come from?

[A]

Stevie, you all right?

[B]

Well, sure I'm all right, but Ernest don't feel so good.

[A]

Mr. Temple, Look, Ernest is out cold.

[B]

Yeah, you know something? Ernest should have his mop washed out with soap. Why, Stevie, he doesn't tell the truth.

[A]

Well, what do you mean?

[B]

Well, last night I seen him driving away with Ming Toy. And when I asked where he was taking her, he says, shh. It's a big secret. Spies have tattooed a secret message on her skin. He found out and he's taken her to the FBI. And I mustn't tell nobody because it's FBI top secret.

[A]

I see.

[B]

But I find out now he was just trying to shut me up.

[A]

Hey, I gotta remember that next time my nephew gets in my hair. FBI top secret. Hey, Louis, then that explains the shaving, huh? The butler must have overheard Ernest telling this young man about the secret message on Ming Toi. And he figured if it was true, the dog would be worth more money. So we look for the message. Sure. When the butler shaves the pooch, Ernest gets wise. The butler is wise, so he shuts the butler up.

[B]

And he tried to shut me up, too. He said we were going to meet an FBI man out here. Instead, he gets me in, and then he pulls out a knife. And then.

[A]

And what happened?

[B]

Judo.

[A]

Judo?

[B]

Sure. My brother was in the marines. He taught me. Heris is waking up.

[A]

And you were worried about the kid? Mr. Templar, like I told you, when them little hyenas is around, all you got to protect is yourself.

[B]

Hey, Mr. Templer, you want me to teach you some falls as a Matter

[A]

of fact, Stevie, I don't.

[B]

Look, I'll show you. First, you take a guy's arm like this.

[A]

Now, just a minute. Let's. Let's talk this over.

[B]

You see, leverage is the important part of this. Let's keep it that way, shall we? I just pulled back real hard. Louis.

[A]

Help. You have been listening to another transcribed adventure of the Saint, the Robin Hood of modern crime. Now, here is our star, Barry Sullivan. Ladies and gentlemen, a long time ago it was written that man shall not live by bread alone. In this often quoted line from the Bible, bread is merely a symbol of all material values. And although we in America have the greatest material advantages in the world, they are not enough to bring us complete happiness. We must find that happiness in our spiritual as well as our material lives, in faith as well as bread. In America, one of our most precious heritages is the right to worship. As we please to know the spiritual pleasures of our churches and synagogues. The doors of your places of worship. Worship. Stand open to you, and your religious leaders will welcome you to their services. They also offer you personal and family guidance and the opportunity to become a firm part of your community. Through our churches and synagogues, that community and the families within it can find stability. And as an individual, you can find the peace that only religion can bring. Thus, the religious organizations of America invite you to find yourself through faith and come to church this week. This is Barry Sullivan inviting you to join us again next week at the same time for another exciting adventure of the Saint. Good. Tonight's script of the Saint was written by Jerome Epstein. In the cast, you heard myra marsh as Mrs. Allardyce and Tom Tully as her husband. Lamont Johnson was their son, Ernest. Ted Osborne was the butler, Jeffrey Silver, with Stevie and Larry Dodkin, was Louie. The music was composed and conducted by Von Dexter. The Saints, based on characters created by Leslie Charteris, is a James L. Safier production and is directed by Helen Mack. All you Saint fans will be glad to know that the Saint comic books are on sale at all newsstands. Your announcer is Don Stanley. Three chimes mean good times on NBC. And the Chimes are anticipating the hilarious antics of Bob Hope and Groucho Marx. Hope returns to the air with more laughs on Tuesday, October 3rd. Groucho Marx brings his riotous quiz, you Bet yout Life to the air on Wednesday, October 4th. So that's Bob Hope. October 3rd. Groucho Marx. October 4th, as three chimes mean good times on NBC.