Even Bad Guys Fall for Scams

Summary

---

CrimeLess: “Even Bad Guys Fall for Scams”

Podcast: CrimeLess
Hosts: Rory Scovel (comedian), Josh Dean (journalist)
Guest: Lane Rose
Release Date: March 25, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this episode, “Even Bad Guys Fall for Scams,” hosts Rory Scovel and Josh Dean flip the script on traditional crime tales by spotlighting real stories where criminals themselves become targets of elaborate stings, cons, and setups. Rather than focusing on innocent victims, this week’s theme is the poetic justice—and dark comedy—of the bad guys getting outwitted. In their trademark irreverent, banter-heavy style, Rory and Josh walk through legendary stings, failed criminal capers, and even a “fake priest” interrogation, all interspersed with their own comic commentary and a final fun round of crime riddles.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Personal Scam Stories and the "Scam Economy"

• (03:29) Host Scam Confession — Josh opens by asking if Rory has ever fallen for a scam. Rory admits to nearly falling for a phishing scam in the early days of email spam, noting:

  “Now, I’m very good at it, but I for sure fell for a scam. I never got in so deep that I gave a lot of information away. I was able to safely backtrack out.” — Rory (03:33)

• Empathy for Elderly Victims — Both sympathize with older generations who are less equipped to detect scams, lamenting the lack of protection for them as digital fraud gets more advanced.

2. When Criminals Get Conned: The Case of Alberto Saavedra Lopez

• (04:36–07:13) Overview — Josh tells the tale of Lopez, who stole $5,000 from his own bank employer in Arizona, went on the run, then brazenly applied for a job as a dispatcher at the local police department under his real name.
  • The police set up an interview, arrested him on the spot. Both hosts revel in the irony:

    “He basically put the bear trap in front of his front door, went to sleep, got up, walked out.” — Josh (06:14) “This guy walked right into a trap we didn’t even set.” — Rory (06:10)

  • Bonus: The police told him he was “out of the running” for the job. (07:43)

3. Operation Flagship: The Legendary Sports Sting

• (08:29–18:38) Main Event — The hosts break down the famous 1985 DC police sting, “Operation Flagship.”
  • Setup: 3,000 fugitives were sent fake invitations to a Redskins (now Washington Commanders) event: brunch, tickets, and a shot at Super Bowl prizes. (09:29–10:51)
  • Execution: 101 wanted men attended and were treated to a pep talk by “Dr. Red Flag”—actually the head of U.S. Marshals Enforcement. At the cue, cops (and undercover cheerleaders & even a mascot) raided the event and made mass arrests:

    “The cheerleaders drew their weapons, as did the chicken and the Indian characters.” — Josh (14:04, quoting the marshal’s memoir)

  • Memorable Details:
    • The fake CEO was "I. Michael Detnaw"—“Detnaw” is “wanted” backwards. (15:38)
    • Some arrestees complained: “This ain’t fair. This just ain’t fair. ... I came to see Boomer,” (the Bengals’ quarterback). (17:05)
  • Impact: 144 arrests at a cost of $22,100—just $153 per fugitive, vs the usual $1,300. The hosts marvel at the cost-effectiveness and movie-worthy absurdity of the whole caper.

4. Criminals Trying to Outsmart the System: The Fake Priest of Taqueria Garibaldi

• (24:05–35:41) California Wage Theft Case — A Sacramento-area Mexican restaurant under Department of Labor investigation tries a desperate intimidation ploy:
  • The owners bring in a “Catholic priest” to coax confessions out of employees—hoping to ID “rats” (workers talking to authorities about wage theft).

    “The priest asked if I’d stolen anything at work ... or if I did anything to harm my employer, as Parra said. Was this a real priest? Rory, this was not a real priest. This was Father Red Flag.” — Josh (27:41)

  • It backfired; the owners were hit with $140,000 in damages and back pay. The Times later tried and failed to confirm if the “priest” was even a priest.
  • Comic Aside: The hosts riff on the concept of “burrito meatballs” (Mexican-Italian fusion), poking fun at taqueria naming, and joke about “imported priests” as a concept. (26:11, 35:16)
• Greater Point: Attempts to manipulate (or intimidate) rarely outsmart the government; more often, they backfire with poetic justice.

5. Deepfake Scams & The AI Age

• (36:04–37:24) Modern Twist — The episode closes with discussion of a new breed of scam: AI-generated deepfake videos using celebrity pastors’ likenesses to solicit money for fraudulent causes. A warning from Pastor Mike Schmitz is played, followed by the hosts joking about megachurches and televangelist scams:

  "You know, I wonder if he’s ever heard of Joel Osteen because that’s not a deep fake." — Rory (37:05)

• Reiteration of Caution — Especially for vulnerable folks (the elderly), new technologies make scams ever more convincing.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On poetic justice:

  “You rarely hear about bad guys getting fooled, right? But it happens. And when it does, it’s glorious karmic justice.” — Josh (04:32)

• On the self-own sting:

  “He set the sting for himself.” — Josh (06:07)

• On Operation Flagship's suspects:

  “I came to see Boomer!” (shouted by an arrestee, as related by Josh) (17:05)

• On reviewing fake priest “scams”:

  “Was this a real priest? Rory, this was not a real priest. This was Father Red Flag.” — Josh (27:41)

• On the new age of AI scams targeting faith:

  “There are people who have made AI generated videos of me ... and basically a scam. People can’t necessarily tell.” — Pastor Mike Schmitz warning (36:32) “You know, I wonder if he’s ever heard of Joel Osteen because that's not a deep fake.” — Rory (37:05)

• On unhelpful middle-of-the-road reviews:

  “I’m always fascinated by people who write reviews of restaurants when they don’t really have super strong feelings one way or the other ... It's like, really?” — Josh (31:37)

---

Highlighted Segments & Timestamps

| Time | Segment/Topic | |-----------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:29 | Hosts share personal run-ins with scams | | 04:36–07:13 | Alberto Saavedra Lopez—the case of a criminal applying for a police job | | 08:29–18:38 | Operation Flagship: The Redskins ticket sting arresting 101 fugitives | | 24:05–35:41 | Fake priest scam at Taqueria Garibaldi | | 36:04–37:24 | AI deepfake scams using religious figures | | 41:42–51:14 | “Lane’s Game”: Comic crime riddles segment (see endnotes) |

---

Tone & Atmosphere

• Highly irreverent, comedic, and self-deprecating
• Banter-heavy with pop-culture sports references, wordplay, and asides on everything from color names to fusion cuisine
• Both hosts underline the absurdity of criminal schemes—especially when crooks get hoisted by their own petard
• Occasional educational asides (e.g., the legal differences between entrapment and a sting)

---

Final Section: “Lane’s Game”—Crime Riddle Round (41:42–51:14)

• Lane Rose presents a series of classic logic riddles themed around crime.
• The hosts comically struggle, riffing on “widdle riddles” and faux-competitiveness.
• Riddles include:
  • The broken window insurance fraud
  • The prisoner with a shovel and a dirt floor
  • The “upside down flag” on a Japanese ship
  • The “one-way ticket” murder in Hawaii
  • The tape recorder “suicide” that had been rewound

---

In Summary

This light-hearted, fast-paced episode uses deft storytelling and sharp banter to celebrate the rare schadenfreude when criminals get outschemed by smarter—and sometimes equally devious—adversaries. Mixing famous real-world stings, oddball recent news, and old detective riddles, Rory and Josh keep things both “funny first” and sneakily informative—living up to their own description of “How Stuff Works if it got drunk and robbed a Papaya King.” Whether you’re a crime buff, comedy lover, or just like seeing a bad guy fall for a bad idea, this one is packed with karmic twists and laugh-out-loud moments.

---

Noteworthy Quotes (by timestamp):

• “He basically put the bear trap in front of his front door, went to sleep, got up, walked out.” — Josh (06:14)
• “The cheerleaders drew their weapons, as did the chicken and the Indian characters.” — Josh, quoting marshal’s memoir (14:04)
• “By the way, we tried to tell you—we dropped little Easter eggs.” — Rory (16:49) on the “Detnaw” alias.
• “The priest asked if I'd stolen anything at work ... Rory, this was not a real priest. This was Father Red Flag.” — Josh (27:41)
• “I wonder if that's illegal. Are you allowed to impersonate a priest?” — Rory (34:12)
• “There are people who have made AI generated videos of me ... and basically it's a scam. People can't necessarily tell.” — Pastor Mike Schmitz (36:32)

---

Takeaway

Crime doesn’t pay—but sometimes, it pays off in hilarious, head-scratching stories when criminals themselves become the victims of clever stings and shocking cons. Stay skeptical; even the bad guys aren’t safe from scams.

Transcript

[TextNow Announcer]

This is an iHeart podcast.

Guaranteed Human locked in Monthly wireless plans were built for another era. TextNow is app first free talking text real 5G coverage and service. You switch up in an instant download TextNow and connect in minutes.

Other wireless carriers tell you when to pay. TextNow asks what do you need? It's app first phone service without commitments, credit checks or carrier attitude. For people who stopped asking for permission, download today.

[Tyler Redick]

Tyler redick here from 2311 Racing game night's fun until someone spends five minutes lining up one shot chalk. Breathe, rechock still aiming while they figure it out. I fire up Chumba Casino. I can spin anywhere, anytime and there's always a new social casino game every week. Spins happen way faster than that shot. Play [e-mail] let's Chumba sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

No purchase necessary. VGW Group voidware prohibited by law 21.

[Josh Dean]

One plus terms and conditions apply.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store wide deals that earn four times the points. Look for in store tags to earn on eligible items from Lindor, Chips Ahoy, Gatorade, Host, Ziplock and Zoa. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pick up or delivery or restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

[Amazon Hub Delivery Announcer]

Amazon Hub Delivery Wants to partner with your business? Help your business Help your neighbors discover a new stream of income for your business. When you partner with Amazon Hub Delivery, you and your team will deliver Amazon packages to customers in your neighborhood on a schedule that works for you, and you'll be paid for every package you deliver. Getting started is easy. There's no delivery experience required, no long term contracts, and you receive weekly direct deposits. Earn more. Gain exposure for your business. Apply today at Amazon.com hubdelivery that's Amazon.com hubdelivery know a local business that would make a great partner? A local coffee shop owner, florist, automotive shop, dry cleaner, you name it. Refer a business today and earn $500 when they successfully join the program. Visit Amazon.com hubdelivery to learn more or refer a partner. That's Amazon.com hubdelivery now looking for hub partners in your area?

[H]

Hey, it's Austin James. Yes, I'm living with diabetes, but it doesn't have to define me. Thanks to the freestyle libre 3 plus sensor. I get real time glucose readings throughout the day. The Freestyle Libre 3 Plus sensor is small and easy to wear, giving me the freedom to focus on my life as a parent and a musician. Now this is progress. You can get a free sensor at freestylelibre.us.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

offer available for people who qualify. Visit MyFreestyle US to see all terms and conditions. Certain exclusions apply. Data on File Avid Diabetes care or prescription only Safety info found@freestyleibre us.

[Rory Scovel]

Wait. I mean, I'm gonna keep doing it, but just know that this feels like entrapment.

[TextNow Announcer]

Campsite media smart bl.

[Josh Dean]

Rory, my question today. Have you ever fallen for a scam?

[Rory Scovel]

Yes. Yes, I have. I've fallen for the early days of someone sending you an email that felt like it was from the government or something. And yet it was the early days, before I knew to just check the email address it was coming from, kind of thing. Now, I'm very good at it, but I for sure fell for a scam. I never got in so deep that I gave a lot of information away. I was able to safely backtrack out.

[Josh Dean]

But no money. You didn't?

[Rory Scovel]

I never lost any money in that regard, no. But I got close to getting fished.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, they're getting good. So. Yeah, don't get too confident.

[Rory Scovel]

I'm not going to lie. The elderly are. I feel so bad for them. They are. Why would they ever be equipped for a world where the government doesn't try to crack down on these scams?

[Josh Dean]

Imagine what it'll be like when we are elderly.

[Rory Scovel]

I know. I already don't know how to do Snapchat. I'm screwed.

[Josh Dean]

Well, in the typical scam story, it's an innocent person being scammed by a clever criminal. And in your story, you were the innocent person. It was some bad actor trying to get money out of you.

[Rory Scovel]

Thank you. Thank you for seeing me.

[Josh Dean]

You rarely hear about bad guys getting fooled, right? But it happens.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

And when it does, it's glorious karmic justice. Like the story of Arizona resident Alberto Saavedra Lopez, who, in 2016, he allegedly stole $5,000 from the bank where he worked. The bank caught on, they reported the funds missing, but before cops could do anything, he quit his job and left town. So 5,000 bucks. Kind of a lot of money, but not a ton of money. So Alberta's now a fugitive, but he's a fugitive who's alleged to have stolen only five grand from a bank. I mean, let's be honest, banks have plenty of money. They make that Much in interest in any branch.

[Rory Scovel]

They have all the money.

[Josh Dean]

They literally have all the money. Except for a crypto money, which I don't understand.

[Rory Scovel]

That's right. Lives in a mine. That's in a coal mine.

[Josh Dean]

So I don't think he was high on the list of criminals being hunted by bloodhounds. Okay, side note here. We should do an episode at some point about whether bloodhounds have actually located any criminals. The run. Great, great.

[Rory Scovel]

Side note, have we just been lied

[Josh Dean]

to by Hollywood all these years? But I digress. So Alberto must not have felt the heat at all, because in the next year, in December 2017, he was browsing the job listings and applied for a job. Would you like to guess what that job was?

[Rory Scovel]

Working in a bank.

[Josh Dean]

It was a listing for a dispatcher at the Cottonwood Police Department.

[Rory Scovel]

You know what? I actually really respect that move. That's how you play the game right there.

[Josh Dean]

So Alberto applies for the job using his real name. And, well, I'm guessing some cop at that department does a routine background check. Probably feels like the guy who built the hire a hitman website that we talked about a few weeks ago. He's just completely dumbstruck, like, no bloodhound necessary here.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So the Cottonwood cops lay their trap.

[Rory Scovel]

This guy walked right into a trap we didn't even set.

[Josh Dean]

Exactly. So they lay their trap. And I'm using that loosely because he laid his own trap. He basically put the bear trap in front of his front door, went to sleep, got up, walked out.

[Rory Scovel]

This feels like a slow confession on his part.

[Josh Dean]

So the trap, by which I mean detectives, called Alberto and said, hey, your resume looks great. You want to come in for an interview?

[Rory Scovel]

Smart.

[Josh Dean]

And I presume Alberto puts on his spiffiest suit. He shows up the first week of January with a briefcase and a kick in his step, looking to start off the year with a new job. And, Rory, would you like to supply the punchline? What happens?

[Lane Rose]

He.

[Rory Scovel]

He discovers himself as a criminal

[Josh Dean]

in the middle of the interview.

[Rory Scovel]

In the middle of the interview, he goes, wait, I might be a criminal?

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, basically correct. Alberto promptly gets arrested. Yeah, so I'm using the term sting loosely here, because actually, he did lay his own trap. He set the sting for himself.

[Rory Scovel]

I wonder, do you think his thinking was, well, surely this looks innocent?

[Josh Dean]

It could be. Yeah. It could be. Like, well, how would they. Why would they possibly suspect a guy?

[Rory Scovel]

Why would I show up for a job if I was a criminal at the police department?

[Josh Dean]

So you're saying it could have arguably been Kind of a brilliant move like 3D chess.

[Rory Scovel]

Well, it clearly was not brilliant, but I wonder if he thought it was brilliant.

[Josh Dean]

And not only that, but if it works. He's like, I'll never get caught if I work at the police station.

[Rory Scovel]

Exactly. Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

He's a wolf in sheep clothing.

[Rory Scovel]

Then.

[Josh Dean]

I don't know. What's that saying? He's.

[Rory Scovel]

I think you got it.

[Josh Dean]

I got it. I nailed that.

[Rory Scovel]

I think you nailed it. It was great.

[Josh Dean]

So he gets arrested. I also enjoyed this detail from the Arizona Republic's coverage of the story. Police also made it clear that Lopez's job prospects would not include employment with the Cottonwood Police. They told Lopez he quote, out of the running.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep, yep, yep. Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Anyway, that was just a little amuse bouche for our episode, Rory. Because this week on Crimeless, we turn the tables and look at scams that ensnared actual criminals.

[Rory Scovel]

God, I love it. Karmic justice. That's after the break.

[Josh Dean]

Hello, and welcome back to Crimeless, the podcast that celebrates the amazing creativity of the world, Dumbest Criminals. And also reminds you every week that just when you think people can't get any stupider, well, they always can.

[Rory Scovel]

They're always capable.

[Josh Dean]

We have not even come close to the bar of how stupid people can be.

[Rory Scovel]

That's true.

[Josh Dean]

I'm Josh Dean.

[Rory Scovel]

And I am Rory Scoville.

[Josh Dean]

So, Rory, what's your favorite sports team?

[Rory Scovel]

You know, probably the Atlanta braves in the 90s, maybe the Chicago Bulls in the 90s, maybe Magic Johnson by himself as a wonder star. None of these are the answers you're looking for. I can see it on your face.

[Josh Dean]

These are throwbacks. No, it's okay. I guess, like, for this thought experiment, like, I guess at the peak your fandom with any of those teams, would you have gone to great lengths to see them in the super bowl or the World Series?

[Rory Scovel]

Maybe the Braves? We didn't, because that would have been insanely expensive. But yeah, maybe, maybe in those Sid Bream days.

[Josh Dean]

Oh, deep cut. I'm. I'm a Mets fan, so I was going to say John Rocker.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay, sure.

[Josh Dean]

That racist asshole.

[Rory Scovel]

Sure.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

If.

[Rory Scovel]

If we need to have some sort of crossover.

[Josh Dean]

He's a racist bastard. I believe Chipper Jones named his kid Shea after Shea Stadium because he always hit very well there. This is turning into a sports podcast.

[Rory Scovel]

Wow.

[Josh Dean]

All right, so most die hard sports fans can probably relate at least a little to the protagonists in our story today. Our main story, because back in late 1985, a few thousand lucky fans in the Washington D.C. area received a letter in the mail inviting them to a special event for the Washington Redskins. That's what the commanders were called back then. For anyone who's not been paying attention way back when, they were at that time, one of the league's best teams. There was probably no harder ticket to get in sports at the time.

[Rory Scovel]

And that's how, you know it was a very, very long time ago.

[Josh Dean]

It is, yes.

[Rory Scovel]

Because they were really good.

[Josh Dean]

You were on the east coast back then. Do you remember those? Like the Hogs?

[Rory Scovel]

No, no, I don't think I followed it enough. I don't think I've ever really followed any sports enough my whole life. They're. They're listeners. I've outed myself.

[Josh Dean]

We just lost half our audience.

[Rory Scovel]

I know I'm not one of you.

[Josh Dean]

Half our audience who tune in to our sports chatter.

[Rory Scovel]

Who tune in only when we're doing Sports Crimes.

[Josh Dean]

Oh, we haven't done any sports crime. Sports Crimes, the spin off show. Okay. Well, anyway, the letter to these Redskins fans came from a startup sports broadcasting network known as the Flagship International Sports Television Inc. Cordially invited them to a brunch at the Washington Convention center on the morning of Dec. 15, when the Redskins were scheduled to play the Cincinnati Bengals. So you get a letter in the mail. Fans who attended would get brunch, of course, but also two free tickets to the game and transportation. Pretty good deal. Yes, I think, like for a random mailing.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

And attendees would also be automatically entered in a drawing for Redskins season tickets. Basically impossible to get at that time. Yep. And an all expenses paid trip to the super bowl in New Orleans. Getting better every minute, right?

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

So putting aside your knowledge that this week's episode is about scams, would you accept this offer?

[Rory Scovel]

I mean, I don't know. What year was it again?

[Josh Dean]

1985.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah, I mean, that's a year before you think. You know, I feel like now we live in such a guarded world of scams and spam and all the things that start with S and end with am. But I think then I probably would assume it's legit and it's on the up and up.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

So I probably would. I probably would have gone and fallen for it.

[Josh Dean]

All right. Well, yeah, you weren't alone. I think that's a very fair answer. More than 100 of these fans who got the letter took Flagship International up on the offer and arrived at a festive convention center where they were greeted by an exuberant man in a headdress and hugged by Redskins Cheerleaders.

[Rory Scovel]

Can I ask a question?

[Josh Dean]

Yep.

[Rory Scovel]

Do you know, like, the varying degrees of crimes that these people had committed? Do we know that? Do we get to that?

[Josh Dean]

We're going to get there.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay. Got it, got it, got it. I feel like every question I ask, you're prepared for it. And that's how I know you're more mature than I am.

[Josh Dean]

I mean, I feel like that's the bare minimum I can do.

[Rory Scovel]

I mean, sometimes this show starts with Rory, what's your favorite color? And I can never kind of nail it down.

[Josh Dean]

Right now. What is your favorite color?

[Rory Scovel]

You know,

[Josh Dean]

now that you ask.

[Rory Scovel]

Yellow, fluorescent orange.

[Josh Dean]

Love it. Perfect. So anyway, there's Redskins cheerleader is a live band, a person in the San Diego Chicken mascot costume, and team hindlights playing on big screen. So, festive environment.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

Eventually, attendees are broken out into smaller groups and sent to a breakout room for a hype talk from the network's honcho, after which they were going to receive their free tickets. So you get there, festive atmosphere, but it's sort of like those. And Lane can speak to this one day. The timeshare holiday vacations that she once fell for.

[Rory Scovel]

I gotta say, that's what I. That's what it felt like inside my soul.

[Josh Dean]

Yep. So, yeah, they're like, oh, you get six weeks in Mexico, just come to this talk, and then you go to the talk, and then they spin you off into another room, and next thing you know, you've signed something.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

You owe hundreds, if not thousands of dollars.

[Rory Scovel]

You owe one of your children. Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So this is. Yeah, I think you're right. This is what I imagine it was like. So they go into the room. The hype man is in a top hat and tux. Louis McKinney is his name.

[Rory Scovel]

Red Flag extraordinaire. His name was Dr. Red Flag.

[Josh Dean]

So Dr. Red Flag, aka Louie McKinney, he tells the fans how great the game is going to be. And then he closed one segment with a rousing surprise. I don't know exactly how this went down, but I guess he paused and waited for the surprise, and nothing happened. So he did it again. He says, today really is your lucky day. He shouted even louder this time. And I've got a big surprise for you, Rory. What was that surprise?

[Rory Scovel]

The police barging into the room. Like at the end of Clue, the movie.

[Josh Dean]

That is correct. Slightly, maybe more aggressive than the end of Clue, but a whole bunch of guys from the U.S. marshals Service Special Operations Group burst into the room, guns out, and arrested each group of fans in a breakout session. As McKinney, who in reality was the head of enforcement operations for the U.S. marshals, later wrote in a memoir, quote, the cheerleaders drew their weapons, as did the chicken and the Indian characters.

[Rory Scovel]

Interesting.

[Josh Dean]

So, yes. Bunch of guys thinking they're about to go to the game, suddenly, nope, you're going to jail.

[Rory Scovel]

Now, I wonder the legality of this. Like, this feels like a version of entrapment. And I say that as someone who doesn't know the law in any capacity, but is this a legal way to round up criminals? And, like, was this just, hey, we didn't really want to go to your house and deal with it.

[Josh Dean]

Also not a lawyer. Want to dig into that in our spin off Lawless. But I believe. And I also don't understand the sports crimes. I believe that entrapment is when they entice you to commit a crime. Like, you're actually entrapped to commit the crime. Not necessarily.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes. Yes. Good for you.

[Josh Dean]

And let me explain a little bit more. You'll get a little bit more of the backstory of these people, so maybe you'll feel a little bit less sympathetic. I don't know. Maybe you won't.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So it was a sting.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

They're all cops. The 101 men arrested that day were all on a list of 3,000 fugitives who collectively had more than 5,100 outstanding warrants. So some of them had more than one warrant.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay.

[Josh Dean]

Flagship International did not exist. It was made up by the marshals, who mailed the invite out to the last known addresses of the fugitives. More than half of the letters were returned. The residents were long gone. But at least 101, I guess, got through. And the men who got them and came to the event were all arrested on outstanding warrants in a hilariously successful stint known as Operation Flagship.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

Quote from the US Marshal for the District of Columbia. It was party time, and they fell for it hook, line, and sinker. He. He wrote that one in advance. Just waiting to say that.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So you'll like this detail. The letter, by the way, was signed by the supposed CEO of Flagship. His name was I, Michael Detnaw. D, E, T, N, A, W. Lane. What does that name spelled backwards?

[Lane Rose]

Wanted. I am wanted.

[Josh Dean]

I mean, it's one. It's a great inside joke, I think.

[Rory Scovel]

I love that even in seriousness of this, they were like, let's have a little fun with. Like, let's. Let's almost give it away.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah. And maybe they were like, you know, if anybody picks up on this, God bless them.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Stay on the run, son.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

You're too smart for the U.S. marshals.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

But no, I mean. And actually, we don't know. It is possible that one or more people out there were like, oh, I see through this. I spelled detona backwards.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah. There is a chance that some of those no shows weren't just because they never got the letter right.

[Josh Dean]

Exactly.

[Rory Scovel]

That's who I want to hear from, the Smarties. But that's not our show. That's not what we're doing here.

[Josh Dean]

If you're out there, drop us a line. We'd love to talk to you.

[Lane Rose]

What would that show be called? Like, Smartless.

[Josh Dean]

So, like, yeah, it's a bit of, like, a thumb. Extra thumb in the eye, though. It's like if. If that was. I don't know if it was pointed out to them at some point. If they're like, by the way, guys, if you've read the fine print.

[Rory Scovel]

By the way, we tried to tell you we dropped the little Easter eggs.

[Josh Dean]

So the buses the men thought would be taking them to the Redskins game instead took them to prison. In a Washington Post story with the headline greedy fugitives seek football tickets, quote, some of the arrestees who I guess they must have brought reporters in to, like, because they're probably so proud of this thing. They're like, by the way, guys, be waiting outside the convention center. Fun shit will go down. And, yeah, I guess the guys were yelling things. And I'm quoting the paper directly here. This ain't fair. This just ain't fair. And my personal favorite. I came to see Boomer. I came to see Boomer. Boomer, for the young folks, was the starting quarterback of the Cincinnati Bengals at the time. Boomer Assize. Yep. So I don't know. I found that to be a somewhat sad scene. I feel just, like, a wee bit bad. This guy was, like, so excited to see Boomer Sias, and instead he's going.

[Rory Scovel]

I do strangely still feel for these criminals. I guess we're all. You know, that's just how it is as humans, you know, we're confused.

[Josh Dean]

Maybe this will help you feel less bad, though. Okay, so among the assembled, 15 warrants for assault, five for robbery, six for burglary, four for escape, 19 for bond default or bail violation, 18 for narcotics, 59 for probation or parole violation, and 41 for a variety of charges from rape to arson to forgery. So, like, some bad dudes.

[Rory Scovel]

All right, well, you know, if you use all those words.

[Josh Dean]

According to the post operation, Flagship cost $22,100 and led to a total of 144 arrests, which turns out to be $153 a fugitive, which seems like a bargain and definitely was because marshals at that time spent an average of 13 dol. $1300 per apprehension.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So like 10 the cost. Yeah. What a deal. Smart. Really hard to believe this isn't a movie.

[Rory Scovel]

Seems like it would be by now.

[Josh Dean]

I know. Like a comedy. Like. Yeah. Put it on our list.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Add it to the crimeless presents.

[Rory Scovel]

I was going to say this is.

[Josh Dean]

We get.

[Rory Scovel]

Get Knoxville on the line. This is another.

[Josh Dean]

Right.

[Rory Scovel]

This is another hillbilly heist.

[Josh Dean]

It really is. It's a pretty great. Especially if you could find some of these guys and catch up with them years later.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

All right, after the break, we travel across America to tackle a very different kind of sting. So. So don't turn that dial.

[Rory Scovel]

That's right, folks. Bee sting.

[TextNow Announcer]

Locked in. Monthly wireless plans were built for another era. TextNow is app first free talking text. Real 5G coverage and service. You switch up in an instant. Download TextNow and connect in minutes.

Other wireless carriers tell you when to pay. Text now asks, what do you need? It's app first phone service without commitments, credit checks or carrier attitude. Built for people who stopped asking for permission. Download today.

[Tyler Redick]

Tyler redick here from 2311 racing another checkered flag for the books. Time to celebrate with Chumba. Jump [e-mail] let's Chumba.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

No purchase necessary BTW group void where prohibited by law circumstances at and C21 plus sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Hello.

[Rory Scovel]

Hello.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbeta. We discussed his vision for the future of quantum computing at IBM Research.

[Jake Mbetta]

What we always do is answer, what is the future of computing? Whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together? It's our DNA to answer the question of what is the future?

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Building actual physical machines. Yeah.

[Jake Mbetta]

It's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature.

[Lane Rose]

Right.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far are we from that point

[Jake Mbetta]

with Quantum, by 2029 we'll build the first fault tolerant Quantum computer that is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com quantum

[Josh Dean]

hey,

[Ryan Seacrest]

it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for storewide deals that earn four times the points. Look for in store tags to earn on eligible items from Lindor, Chips Ahoy, Gatorade, Host, Ziploc and Zoa. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pick up or delivery restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

[Amazon Hub Delivery Announcer]

Want to earn extra income for your business? Amazon Hub Delivery is looking for ambitious business owners to assist with local deliveries. When you become a partner, you and your staff will deliver packages to customers in your area on a schedule that works for you. With each package delivered, you'll gain extra income and exposure for your business. Plus plus Amazon Hub Delivery makes it easy to get started. There's no upfront costs, delivery experience or long term contracts required. Sign up to learn [e-mail] hubdelivery that's Amazon.com hubdelivery

[Josh Dean]

this is crimeless welcome back to Crimeless, the podcast that may or may not be an elaborate sting to eventually catch Rory Scoffel in a crime.

[Rory Scovel]

Wait, I mean, I'm gonna keep doing it, but just know that this feels like entrapment.

[Josh Dean]

I'm sorry, did I say that out loud? Don't worry, Rory, you're safe. We know you're a law abiding citizen. I tried to ask you if you committed a crime. You couldn't even come up with one.

[Rory Scovel]

All right, light flato blue golden brand is probably my favorite color, but it did used to be fluorescent orange there. Am I still in trouble for anything?

[Josh Dean]

What were those first words? Light What? I don't know how.

[Rory Scovel]

I don't know how you pronounce it. The color is. It's light L I G, H T. But then the second word is P H L A T. Oh, I don't know if that's flato flay.

[Josh Dean]

Dr. I don't know what that. Where are you hearing about this?

[Rory Scovel]

Well, I paint quite often, Josh. And once you start painting, you then interact with colors you like, which merely means it's not like I'm intelligent in some way. But when you have to interact with these colors is when you then learn what they're called. So by nature of consequence, I've come to realize I really love that shade of blue.

[Josh Dean]

I was just gonna say purple for me, but I need to look at my pantones.

[Rory Scovel]

I think you're. I think we could go better with that description.

[Josh Dean]

All right. Next week.

[Rory Scovel]

I know. I think you're more of a deep violet, if I had to guess.

[Josh Dean]

Or do you also know Pantone numbers?

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

No.

[Rory Scovel]

What is that? Maybe I do and I.

[Josh Dean]

Never mind.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay.

[Josh Dean]

I don't. I think. Forget it.

[Rory Scovel]

Are those. Is that like a description of the color through number categorizing?

[Josh Dean]

Yeah. You like. You get the actual color from Pantone, which makes colors. This is fascinating conversation.

[Rory Scovel]

Just think, there's a painter right now listening who is livid at our mistakes. We just lost them. And sports fans are out.

[Josh Dean]

I love that show. Until they started talking about paint. Fucking morons.

[Rory Scovel]

Loved every element till they couldn't pronounce the colors properly.

[Josh Dean]

All right, for our next tale today, Rory, we turn our attention to California.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay.

[Josh Dean]

A state we don't visit quite as often as Florida, but one that we shouldn't sleep on either.

[Rory Scovel]

No.

[Josh Dean]

Actually leads all US States, crimes. But that's not so surprising because it's the largest state by quite some margin.

[Rory Scovel]

Right.

[Josh Dean]

Want to guess which state has the most crimes per capita?

[Rory Scovel]

Well, you're saying it's not California, and

[Josh Dean]

you're going to want to say Florida, but I'm just going to say, give you a clue. And it's not Florida.

[Rory Scovel]

I'm going to say it's not Florida. I'm going to say.

[Josh Dean]

Oh, God.

[Rory Scovel]

Can I guess regionally first? And if I'm off, I'm off.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, sure.

[Rory Scovel]

Southeast?

[Josh Dean]

No.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay, then give it to me. Which. Give me a region. Give me the region. Midwest.

[Josh Dean]

Well, no.

[Rory Scovel]

Northeast. Nope. Okay. Is it. What is this a scam?

[Josh Dean]

You're like, I'm out of regions. So the highest violent crime rate, and this is a Pacific Northwest? Yeah, basically.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay.

[Josh Dean]

Extreme Pacific Northwest. Okay.

[Rory Scovel]

Alaska.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

I think I kind of knew in my heart, but you kind of forget about Alaska.

[Josh Dean]

You do.

[Rory Scovel]

If anyone's listening from Alaska, obviously we're joking.

[Josh Dean]

No, I love. I've been there a few times. Love it. Spectacularly beautiful. But even when you look at the map of the United States, it's just kind of up there off to the side.

[Rory Scovel]

It's funny. Hawaii, as small as it is, registers more than Alaska, which is a whole other country itself.

[Josh Dean]

Bigger than I believe Texas and California combined. It's huge.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So it has the highest violent crime rate for property crimes. It's New Mexico, which I was very surprised by.

[Rory Scovel]

Oh, wow.

[Josh Dean]

Okay. Was that Breaking Bad's fault?

[Rory Scovel]

I was going to say that's Albuquerque for you.

[Josh Dean]

I guess. To me, New Mexico is like turquoise and like old ladies painting.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah. And it is still those things. It is still those things.

[Josh Dean]

And Native Americans, of course. Lots of them. Okay. But we were talking about California. This happens to be our second story featuring a California restaurant that sells tacos.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes.

[Josh Dean]

Not Taco Bell this time.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes. Here we go.

[Josh Dean]

In this case, it's Taqueria Garibaldi, which has three locations in the Sacramento area.

[Rory Scovel]

Garibaldi, Just this sounds like Mexican Italian fusion.

[Josh Dean]

I don't think it is, but you're right. It's like one of those, like, that has tacos with meatballs in them, which,

[Rory Scovel]

by the way, I now am craving. And I didn't even know I had a craving for a thing. We just thought of.

[Josh Dean]

Why aren't there burrito meatballs?

[Rory Scovel]

Thank you.

[Josh Dean]

Meatball. Meatball burritos. A burrito meatball is a weird thing

[Rory Scovel]

to car meatballs wrapped in a flour tortilla that's been slightly toasted on a. On a sandwich press. Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Let's go. So, yes, I believe this is actually strictly Mexican, but you're right. This is a great idea that we have just come up with. Patent that. That burrito is ours.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah. When you bite into the burrito, you're like, there's pasta in here.

[Josh Dean]

Ziti.

[Rory Scovel]

Whoa.

[Josh Dean]

We even have this slogan. There you go. There's pasta in here.

[Rory Scovel]

There's pasta in here. There's pasta in here.

[Josh Dean]

That's great. All right. Coming to a strip mall near you. Okay, so back in 2021, Eduardo Hernandez, one of the owners, told his employees that he was calling in a specialist to improve their mental health. A Catholic priest. Is this something any boss of yours has ever done?

[Rory Scovel]

I've never heard any of the words you just said in one sentence together.

[Josh Dean]

So according to news reports, that supposed priest came in and asked taqueria workers a series of pretty leading questions. Like, had they stolen from the restaurant, been late to work, or didn't like the owner? One employee, Maria Parra, said in a sworn oath reported by the New York Times, that her encounter with the man who claimed he was there to, quote, get the sins out of me felt more like an interrogation than a confession. Which it basically was, of course.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

The priest asked if I'd stolen anything at Work if I was late to my employment or if I did anything to harm my employer, and if I had bad intentions toward my employment, as Para said. Was this a real priest?

[Rory Scovel]

Rory, this was not a real priest. This was Father Red Flag.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah. Yes. Okay, so he had been hired by Che Garibaldi, Inc. The ownership group of the Taqueria, not to catch employees and actual thefts, but to identify who among them might be rats.

[Rory Scovel]

By the way, nothing would make me happier than to find out it is the same marshal. And even though he's dressed as a priest, still wearing a top hat Duxina jacket. Because he just has to.

[Josh Dean]

At every sting, he came from a wedding. So it's trying to identify who among them might be rats or had the potential to be rats, because the restaurant was under investigation from the Department of Labor for wage theft.

[Rory Scovel]

Oh, okay, now I see what's going on. Love this.

[Josh Dean]

All right, which means the real perps

[Rory Scovel]

here, this is like a little double cross in a way.

[Josh Dean]

Exactly. So the real bad guys are the restaurants owners.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes. Love it.

[Josh Dean]

According to the New York Times, Labor Department investigators believed the intention of the confession scam was to intimidate workers and possibly extract information about their interactions with investigators who were looking into the alleged wage theft. Love it. Which had found that workers were not paid for overtime and that their pooled tip money was often used to pay managers.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

So basically, owners start to suspect or know they're under investigation. They're trying to find out who's been talking to the investigators. The way they do that is not by just asking them or watching them. They hire a fake priest to come in and give confession. Presumably because employers of Mexican restaurant are Mexicans. Mexico is a highly Catholic country. These might or probably were very religious. People who might be moved by the presence of a priest actually might say something to a priest because they think he's a priest.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

So smart, but also quite devious.

[Rory Scovel]

Very devious, but I gotta say, super, super smart.

[Josh Dean]

Well, except it backfired, and a federal Judge ultimately ordered Mr. Hernandez and the other owner of Taqueria Garibaldi not home. To the burrito. Meatball Burrito.

[Rory Scovel]

Right.

[Josh Dean]

To pay 140 grand in back pay and damages to 35 workers. So the fake priest scam failed. Or I guess it backfired. Yeah, because they got in even more trouble.

[Rory Scovel]

Sounds like the priest was a bad actor.

[Josh Dean]

You think that was a problem?

[Rory Scovel]

I mean, if the one witness you were talking about or the one victim, in a way, was like. It seemed more like an interrogation.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

It's like. Like, oh, he. Maybe she was like the 35th employee to get interviewed, and he was like, look, do you want to. Are you mad at them? You want to. Are you mad at your wages?

[Josh Dean]

I mean, bless our Father, whatever.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah. He does it wrong. Does the sign of the cross wrong, starts.

[Josh Dean]

Let's just. Let's just get to it.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah. Yeah. Let's pray together for a second. Blah, blah, blah.

[Josh Dean]

Okay.

[Rory Scovel]

Do you hate your boss?

[Josh Dean]

We all do, right? Yeah. I mean, I hate my boss.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Not you. God. Jesus.

[Rory Scovel]

Wouldn't you admit this place sounds like Mexican Italian fusion at its core. So maybe there's something going on here.

[Josh Dean]

Well, yes, I. I actually had that thought, which is that, like, if we're not already using this scam to trap mobsters, shouldn't we be? Yeah, right. Like the fake priest confession thing. Seems like if the marshals and the FBI aren't doing this already, they should be. They should be constantly.

[Rory Scovel]

I mean, who's to say that any priest is. Is real? Like, they could all be marshals. Keep that in mind at your next confession, Josh. And I know that you never go, like, I recommend, but.

[Josh Dean]

But Taqueria Garibaldi, as of this taping, is still in business. Let's hope they're being nicer to employees. I rooted around in their Google reviews to see if anyone was mad about the priest thing, but I mostly saw positive reviews of their food. Only a few 1 stars, like this one, which sounds like a modernist poem. Oh, food tastes not great. Burrito not cooked well. Tacos too plain. Service was fast. Okay. Ambiance was acceptable. Busy place.

[Rory Scovel]

That does. It does sound like someone writing a haiku. Unaware of the syllabic rules of a haiku.

[Josh Dean]

They're trying and just like, fuck it, I'll submit it.

[Rory Scovel]

Screw it. I know. It's too many lines, too many syllables.

[Josh Dean]

I don't care. I'm always fascinated by people who write reviews of restaurants when they don't really have super strong feelings one way or the other. The salsa was pretty good. I don't know. My burrito came out fast, but the taco, you know, was a little bit dry. It's like, really?

[Rory Scovel]

My buddy Lars and his son are always wildly fascinated by three star reviews because it's. So. Why? It's just either a five or a one. Like, what are we doing with the Right?

[Josh Dean]

Exactly. Because it's like, if you love it or if you're mad, that's when you tend to go and say something. If you're just like, oh, it's fine. I guess I'm going to go home and fire up the laptop and write it down.

[Rory Scovel]

This place was fine. Three stars. And you thought we needed to know that.

[Josh Dean]

It's true. It's so true. I also, like at one point went down a rabbit hole of things that get reviewed on Google. Google allows you to review anything on Google Maps?

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

This is going to sound like a ridiculous to say I was going to the CIA headquarters for an event, a reading, basically. Yeah, there's a backstory. Someday we'll tell you. But basically I just, I went to Google Maps to see if I knew how to get there in a car. And when I popped up underneath, I noticed there were like various star reviews. And I went and looked at them. I'm like, some of them were jokes, obviously, but others were like, difficult location to find. I'm like, wait, what I people like, why would people review this headquarters?

[Rory Scovel]

I'm obsessed with Dairy Queen. I love Dairy Queen. And when I'm on the road, sometimes I want to find a Dairy Queen. And sometimes you find one that has horrible reviews and it's usually like, well, yeah, no one's really leaving reviews. The only time you leave a review at a fast food place is when it wasn't good.

[Josh Dean]

Exactly.

[Rory Scovel]

So they're always uncharacteristic. You go and you're like, I don't know why it has one star. It actually was pretty good. You're like, yeah, because one person had a bad experience and that's the only review that's ever been like, if you're looking for a car wash, odds are it's going to have horrible reviews. Why would anyone enjoy the car wash and then write about it?

[Josh Dean]

It's so true. It's so true. So basically, reviews are worthless if you think of it that way in a lot of ways.

[Rory Scovel]

Like, I get it for certain restaurants when people are like, oh, people need to know this restaurant is good because it's a mom and pop independently owned place. But if you start getting into corporate owned franchises, the only people leaving reviews were unhappy, happy.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, that's true.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Because in theory you kind of know what you're getting.

[Rory Scovel]

Exactly.

[Josh Dean]

By the way, the New York Times, which does not like to leave any stones unturned, attempted to solve the other remaining mystery. Was the alleged priest actually even a priest? The answer? Inconclusive.

[Rory Scovel]

I wonder if that's illegal. Can you. Are you allowed to impersonate a priest? Like the way you're not supposed to impersonate a cop or a doctor?

[Josh Dean]

I Don't think it's a cry. It's probably. Well, it's. I guess it would. It. It would get into crime territory if you start asking for money or receiving benefits of some kind. But you could walk around with a priest collar, and I don't think.

[Rory Scovel]

You mean to tell me that at the airport I could just start flying wearing a priest outfit, Never saying I'm a priest. Just let people make their own assumptions based on my clothing.

[Josh Dean]

I think you should try it.

[Rory Scovel]

This is worth an experiment. This is worth it.

[Josh Dean]

See what happens.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Also curious how people treat you. Yeah. You probably get favorable treatment. Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Because everybody loves a Catholic priest. Nothing bad has happened in the Catholic Church in all of human history.

[Rory Scovel]

If it has, people just brush it off. No one cares. What am I gonna do?

[Josh Dean]

Report back Rory?

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Amazon Hub Delivery Announcer]

Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Okay. They did manage to reach a spokesman for the Diocese of Sacramento, which oversees Catholic churches in the metro area. He said the man was not known to them, not part of the diocese. I guess he could have been an imported priest, but I'm gonna guess.

[Rory Scovel]

An imported priest. That is what a phrase.

[Josh Dean]

The name of our new.

[Rory Scovel]

All right, give it up for the imported priests

[Josh Dean]

play in the opening of what's our Mexican Italian fusion restaurant. Hey, there's pasta in here. Yeah, we need to tell you. We need a name for the restaurant. That's our slogan is hey, there's pasta in here.

[Rory Scovel]

Such a good slogan.

[Josh Dean]

Such a good slogan. All right, I think we can all celebrate that the pre scam backfired and the only people punished were the ones who set it up. Up. If the FBI is not using this to nail mobsters, they got to do it, and it feels like it would work.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

I can assure you we will also be revisiting this terrain because when I was looking into stories, there are a lot of fake priest stories out there. And also, to be fair to other faiths, fake religious leaders of all kinds, some amazing tales. So that's.

[Rory Scovel]

Don't. Don't assume it's only Christian.

[Josh Dean]

Definitely not. We have them from all the world's religions. Everybody's represented, including, as I just read, the latest evolution, which I'll just mention here at the end, deep fake AI Videos of pastors preaching fire and brimstone and then asking for money. So just very briefly, I'm going to give you a snippet of this. I'm going to turn the mic over to Pastor Mike Schmitz, who you might know as that dashingly handsome guy on that podcast charts. He's always at the top of the charts with his Bible in a Year podcast. Yep, he's massive. He's got this huge YouTube channel. And here's a warning. He recently played for his flock. There are people who have made AI generated videos of me, audio of me

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

trying to raise money for something else.

[Josh Dean]

And basically a scam. People can't necessarily tell that's a problem. This is your last chance to receive God's blessings today. And I come in the name of Jesus to bring it. You must act quickly because the spots for sending prayers are already running out.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Secure your blessing before it's too late.

[Josh Dean]

Man, they look real.

[Rory Scovel]

You know, I wonder if he's ever heard of Joel Osteen because that's not a deep fake.

[Josh Dean]

You're right. Yeah, but like poor Pastor Mike. I don't know.

[Rory Scovel]

Our priest Mike, Priest Mike, Father Mike. I like that he's not trying to scam people for money. Appreciate that.

[Josh Dean]

But amazingly, there are a lot of people out there trying to use his robot.

[Rory Scovel]

Father Mike is trying to.

[Josh Dean]

Some of those videos were a little robotic, but they're not bad. Right.

[Rory Scovel]

But again, like we were talking about the elderly.

[Josh Dean]

I know.

[Rory Scovel]

The elderly is not sitting here being able to distinguish AI at this point.

[Josh Dean]

I know, I know. So in closing, Rory, you live in the land of the mega church. Be careful out there.

[Rory Scovel]

Love it. And also that's why I moved here.

[Josh Dean]

And yeah, if you go about life wondering just a little, if everyone you encounter setting you up, then we've done our work today. Be skeptical. Yep. Head on a swivel, as they say.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

In the military. That's me. You know who's definitely setting you up for a quiz Lane. That's after the break.

[TextNow Announcer]

Locked in monthly wireless plans were built for another era. TextNow is app first. Free talking text. Real 5G coverage and service. You switch up in an instant. Download TextNow and connect in minutes.

Other wireless carriers tell you when to pay. TextNow asks, what do you need? Need? It's app first. Phone service without commitments, credit checks or carrier attitude. Built for people who stopped asking for permission. Download today.

[Tyler Redick]

Tyler redick here from 2311 racing another checkered flag for the books. Time to celebrate with Chumba. Jump [e-mail]. let's Chumba.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

No purchase necessary. BTW group void where prohibited by law. CTNC21+ sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[Josh Dean]

Hello.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

Hello.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

I'm Malcolm Gladwell, host of Smart Talks with IBM. I recently spoke with IBM's new director of research, Jake Mbetta. We discussed his vision for the future

[Jake Mbetta]

of Quantum computing at IBM Research what we always do is answer what is the future of computing? Whether it's coming up with new algorithms, coming up with better AI, coming up with quantum, or coming up with just how do different accelerators go together? It's our DNA. To answer the question question of what is the future?

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Isn't it a perfect problem for IBM because you kind of need to have a legacy of building stuff.

[Rory Scovel]

Yes.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Building actual physical machines.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah.

[Jake Mbetta]

It's why I came to IBM. I wanted the experience, the culture of building hard things that others have not done before.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

Where do you imagine we are in the timeline of this technology? There will come a point when it will mature, right?

[Jake Mbetta]

Yeah.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

My cell phone is a mature technology at this point. How far away from that point?

[Jake Mbetta]

With quantum by 2029 we'll build the first fault tolerant quantum computer that is one that can run a very, very large, large problem.

[Malcolm Gladwell]

To learn how IBM is building the future of computing, visit IBM.com quantum foreign

[Ryan Seacrest]

hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for store wide deals and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags to earn on eligible items from Hunts, Nerds, Pillsbury, Lowry's, Breyers, Quaker and Culture Pop. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pick up or delivery delivery restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

[Amazon Hub Delivery Announcer]

Amazon Hub Delivery Wants to partner with your business Help your business Help your neighbors discover a new stream of income for your business. When you partner with Amazon Hub Delivery, you and your team will deliver Amazon packages to customers in your neighborhood on a schedule that works for you and you'll be paid for every package you deliver. Getting started is easy. There's no delivery experience required, no long term contracts and you receive weekly direct deposits. Earn more. Gain exposure for your business. Apply today at Amazon.com hubdelivery that's Amazon.com hubdelivery know a local business that will make a great partner? A local coffee shop owner, florist, automotive shop, dry cleaner, you name it. Refer a business today and earn $500 when they successfully join the program. Visit Amazon.com hubdelivery to learn more or refer a partner. That's Amazon.com hubdelivery now looking for hub partners in your area?

[Josh Dean]

Hello law abiding podcast fans of America and Welcome back to Crimeless, a weekly celebration of America's foremost ding dongs. It's now that time of the show. When we pass the mic, we. Rory, what's next?

[Rory Scovel]

Lane's game.

[Lane Rose]

Little low energy there, but it's okay.

[Rory Scovel]

Wow. Okay, wow.

[Lane Rose]

Wow, guys.

[Rory Scovel]

Lanes game.

[Lane Rose]

There we go.

[Josh Dean]

There we go.

[Lane Rose]

So today we talked about some pretty good, you know, police work, some good setups and research. So I figured today you guys could try your hand at solving some of your own cases. I've got some riddles.

[Josh Dean]

Oh, riddles.

[Lane Rose]

Riddles. Which I adapted from the forum section of Oregon's Recreation and Park Association's website, which also appear to be from Reader's Digest Australia.

[Rory Scovel]

Would you say these riddles are just kind of small in size?

[Lane Rose]

Small riddles? Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

So we could call them widdle riddles.

[Lane Rose]

Yeah, there's some widdle widdles.

[Rory Scovel]

All right. Widdle riddles.

[Josh Dean]

Here we go. Widdle riddles.

[Rory Scovel]

See, it's a theater game.

[Josh Dean]

Warmup before a performance. Widow riddles.

[Rory Scovel]

Widow riddles. Unique New York widow riddles.

[Lane Rose]

This one's called the stolen Bracelet. A woman named Kathy goes to the police claiming that someone broke into her house and stole her diamond bracelet while she was at work. The policemen investigate the scene and notice that the window, the bedroom window is broken. There are muddy footprints all over the bedroom floor. However, the room is otherwise neat and organized. The following day, Kathy is arrested for fraud.

[Rory Scovel]

Can you figure out why the window was broken from the inside?

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, this is like we used to read, actually still do to our kids. The Encyclopedia Brown books, they're always there. This is very reminiscent of that. It's probably has something to do with the footprints, but I think you're right. The window's broken from the inside.

[Lane Rose]

Correct. I started you guys off with a little bit of a softball, but.

[Rory Scovel]

Yeah, because it was just because you gave us just a widow one to start.

[Lane Rose]

A widdle.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

A widdle. A widdle widow.

[Lane Rose]

To start

[Josh Dean]

getting a widdle bigger with this one. Yeah, this one's gonna be a widdle

[Rory Scovel]

bigger than the previous one. That was just a widdle itty bitty

[Josh Dean]

witty, witty, witty wittle bit harder.

[Lane Rose]

This one's called boinking out of jail.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay. Boinking out of jail. Boinking out of jail. Oh. Oh, wow.

[Lane Rose]

Accused of stealing the farmer's chickens, Jack is locked up in an empty room in the local jail. His cell has a dirt floor and is completely void of any accessories except for his shovel. There's a window overlooking the hills outside. Jack is determined to break out and Prove his innocence. But the window is too high to reach. How can he escape? I'm gonna note that digging a tunnel is not feasible because the ground beneath him, the dirt, is rock hard, and he doesn't have the energy to dig through it because he is deprived of food and water. So how is he getting.

[Josh Dean]

Wait, he has a shovel.

[Lane Rose]

He has a shovel. There's a dirt floor.

[Josh Dean]

Does he have a bed?

[Rory Scovel]

I feel like something was said earlier that I. I maybe skimmed over. Wait, he stole the farmer's chickens and he was put in a little woodle room by himself with a shovel, which. What? Who are these cops?

[Josh Dean]

Just a. So just a shovel? There's nothing else in the room?

[Lane Rose]

Yeah, so here's the details. Empty room, dirt floor. Only on a shovel. He can see the outside from the windows.

[Josh Dean]

Can he. Can he stand on the shovel?

[Rory Scovel]

You know, Josh, it just say undecided.

[Josh Dean]

Well, no, but if you. If you have the shovel.

[Rory Scovel]

No, no. Picturing the leaned against the wall. We already pictured that scenario.

[Josh Dean]

And then you just get enough of a lift, then you can grab the edge of the window.

[Rory Scovel]

Do you want to know what I pictured? I pictured that he somehow gets the shovel through the bars, turns it, and now he's got, like, a handle. Yeah, to pull himself up. All right, I'm undecided.

[Lane Rose]

Okay. I was looking for Jack uses a shovel. So close with that, but he makes a pile of dirt.

[Rory Scovel]

I thought you said he couldn't dig into the dirt.

[Lane Rose]

He can't make a tunnel. He can dig into the dirt.

[Rory Scovel]

My first guess was he was going to build a mound of dirt. Dirt. Not even joking. That was legit.

[Josh Dean]

My first question.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay, well, but I tucked it away because I thought he couldn't dig. But then I was like, that's why the cops gave him the shot.

[Josh Dean]

We trust you, Rory. We'll give you that one.

[Lane Rose]

It was a little trick. All right. This one's called Thief at Sea. A Japanese ship was leaving the port on its way to open sea. The captain went to go oil some parts of the ship and took his ring off so it wouldn't get damaged. But when he came back, he couldn't find his ring. Someone. Someone had stolen. So he suspects three crew members that could be guilty. And he asked them what they had been doing for the 10 minutes that he was gone. Here's what they said. First, the cook said I was in the kitchen preparing tonight's dinner. The engineer said I was working in the engine room to make sure everything was running smoothly. And the first mate said I was on the mask correcting the flag because someone had attached it upside down by mistake. The captain knew immediately who stole his ranch. Who was it and how did he know?

[Rory Scovel]

I know it.

[Josh Dean]

It was something in the first part.

[Rory Scovel]

Engine room guy. Because he was in the engine doing the oiling.

[Josh Dean]

Oh, yeah, right. Of course. The captain was in the engine room. He would know.

[Lane Rose]

I'm gonna say no to that, but do you have another? I. I realize the way that Australia Readers Digest wrote this can be confusing. I'll read the first part again.

[Josh Dean]

It's because the water goes around the sink the other way.

[Rory Scovel]

That's so. That was my second guess. Honestly, I swear to God. That and the shovel thing.

[Josh Dean]

All right, so let's try. Give us one more time.

[Lane Rose]

A Japanese ship was leaving the port on its way to open sea. I'm just going to say the captain disappeared. He just. He. He went to the bathroom and took his ring off.

[Rory Scovel]

Okay. Different story.

[Lane Rose]

Because he was really getting in there.

[Josh Dean]

Okay.

[Lane Rose]

And when he came back, it was gone. The first line is all you need. A Japanese ship was leaving the port on its way to sea.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep.

[Josh Dean]

Give us the suspects. The. The alibis will more.

[Lane Rose]

I was in the kitchen preparing tonight's dinner. I was working in the engine room to make sure everything was running smoothly. And I was on the mast correcting the flag because someone had attached it upside down by mistake.

[Josh Dean]

I still don't know.

[Rory Scovel]

I have no idea.

[Lane Rose]

A Japanese ship.

[Rory Scovel]

Oh, the third one. Oh.

[Josh Dean]

Because the flag's a circle. The flag looks the same upside down.

[Lane Rose]

There you go.

[Rory Scovel]

And I knew that the whole time. I was just trying to kind of get Josh to see it the way I saw it.

[Lane Rose]

Rory's so patient with you, Josh.

[Josh Dean]

He is.

[Rory Scovel]

There you go, teammate.

[Josh Dean]

It just takes a little bit of patience.

[Lane Rose]

A little bit of patience. This one's a honeymoon mystery. A couple went to Hawaii for their honeymoon. Unfortunately, the husband returned home alone because his wife had died in a horrible boating accident. The police contacted the travel agent who booked the trip for the couple and then arrested the husband for murdering his wife because something the travel agent told him tipped him off. What did the travel agent say?

[Josh Dean]

Oh, he only bought one plane ticket home.

[Rory Scovel]

Yep. And I knew that. I already knew that. I was just waiting for Josh to catch up.

[Lane Rose]

Basically, the travel agent revealed that he had booked a one way ticket for his wife.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, that's the same thing.

[Jake Mbetta]

I get the point.

[Josh Dean]

Clearly get the point.

[Rory Scovel]

Just to save the money. What a weirdo. Kind of reminds me of the pilot to Columbia, which I Recently watched.

[Josh Dean]

I have no idea what happens in the combo.

[Rory Scovel]

I've never seen it. It's kind of a mystery of traveling on a vacation, not coming back together, you know, I don't want to give too much away. It's a lot of people. Probably got it on their list, no spoilers.

[Josh Dean]

They are. It's. It's very hot right now.

[Rory Scovel]

Colombo.

[Lane Rose]

All right, this is the last one, which I'm just calling Murder or Suicide. Interesting, because a man was found dead on the floor with an old cassette recorder in one hand and a gun in the other. When the police arrived at the scene, they pressed play on the recorder. It was the man's voice. He said, I have nothing else to live for. I can't go on, followed by the sound of a gunshot. After listening, the police knew that it was a murder, not a suicide. How did they know?

[Rory Scovel]

The. The fingerprint on the recorder didn't match the fingerprint on the gun.

[Josh Dean]

The stop button had been hit. Oh, because it would. If he had recorded it and then shot himself.

[Rory Scovel]

It would still record, wouldn't.

[Josh Dean]

It would still be recording. It would have been longer recording.

[Lane Rose]

Close. Yeah. I mean, if the dead man had killed himself, he wouldn't have been able to press rewind on the cassette recorder.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah. So basically.

[Lane Rose]

Yeah.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah. Like it had.

[Rory Scovel]

They could have stopped it from recording. Oh, wait, they found it at the beginning.

[Lane Rose]

They just pushed play. Yeah.

[Rory Scovel]

Got it. Got it.

[Josh Dean]

I'm taking credit. I'm accepting credit for that.

[Rory Scovel]

I'm gonna give Josh credit for that.

[Josh Dean]

But just a little bit.

[Lane Rose]

There's a little bit.

[Rory Scovel]

Just a little bit of credit. I also like my fingerprint thing. Not trying to start an argument. I know. Honestly, I'm not trying to start an argument.

[Lane Rose]

It could have worked. You know, it's not the. I don't have the full picture of how this investigation went down.

[Rory Scovel]

It's hypothetical.

[Josh Dean]

Yeah, that's the CSI version. The genetic material did not match exactly

[Lane Rose]

the trace DNA that was.

[Josh Dean]

We did pretty well. I think we got most of them.

[Lane Rose]

We did really well.

[Josh Dean]

We did really, really well.

[Rory Scovel]

Just a little bit.

[Josh Dean]

Willy. Willy well.

[Rory Scovel]

Widdles. Widdle riddles.

[Lane Rose]

Widdle, widdle. Maybe. Maybe a reoccurring segment.

[Josh Dean]

We did Willy well on the Widdle riddle.

[Rory Scovel]

Widdle riddles.

[Josh Dean]

Let's go. All right, we'll see you next week.

[Jake Mbetta]

Bye.

[Lane Rose]

Bye.

[Josh Dean]

Crimeless is a production of Smartless Media, Campside Media and Big Money Players in partnership with Iheart Podcasts. It's hosted by Rory Scovel and me. Josh Dean, our senior producer, is Lane Rose. Emma Siminoff is our Associate producer. We're sound, designed and engineered by Blake Brook with support from Ewan leiter Mewin. Mark McAdam composed our theme song. The executive producers at Campside Media are Vanessa Gregoriadis, Matt Sher and me, Josh Dean. The executive producers for iHeart Podcast and Big Money Play Players are Jack O', Brien, Lindsey Hoffman and Matt Apodaca. For Smartlos Media, the executive producers are Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes and Richard Corson. Bernie Kaminski is Head of Production. The Associate producer is Matty McCann. A special thanks to our operations team, Ashley Warren and Sabina Mara. Do you have a question, comment or confession for the Crimeless team? Email [e-mail] and if you enjoyed Crimeless, please rate and review the show wherever you get your podcasts. It helps people find the show and also makes us feel validated. Unless you're mean, in which case keep it to yourself. We'll see you next week. Crimeless Nation.

[TextNow Announcer]

Locked in Monthly wireless plans were built for Another era Texna TextNow is app first free talking text real 5G coverage and service. You switch up in an instant download TextNow and connect in minutes.

Other wireless carriers tell you when to pay. TextNow asks what do you need? It's app first phone service without commitments, credit checks or carrier attitude. Built for people who stopped asking for permission. Download today.

[Tyler Redick]

Tyler redick here from 2311 racing another checkered flag for the books. Time to celebrate with Chumba. Jump [e-mail] let's shamba.

[Chumba Casino Announcer]

No purchase necessary. BTW Group void. We're prohibited by law. CTNC21+ sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[Ryan Seacrest]

Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. It's stock up savings time now through March 31st. Spring in for storewide deals and earn four times the points. Look for in store tags to earn on eligible items from Hunts, Nerds, Pillsbury, Lowry's, Breyers, Quaker and Culture Pop. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Stack up those rewards to save even more. Enjoy savings on top of savings when you shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pick up or delivery restrictions apply. See website for full terms and conditions.

[Amazon Hub Delivery Announcer]

Amazon Hub Delivery Wants to partner with your business. Help your business. Help your neighbors discover a new stream of income for your business. When you partner with Amazon Hub Delivery, you and your team will deliver Amazon packages to customers in your neighborhood on a schedule that works for you and you'll be paid for every package you deliver. Getting started is easy. There's no delivery experience required, no long term contracts, and you receive weekly direct deposits. Earn more. Gain exposure for your business. Apply today at Amazon.com hubdelivery that's Amazon.com hubdelivery know a local business that will make a great partner. A local client, coffee shop owner, florist, automotive shop, dry cleaner, you name it. Refer a business today and earn $500 when they successfully join the program. Visit Amazon.com hubdelivery to learn more or refer a partner. That's Amazon.com hubdelivery now looking for hub partners in your area?

[Danielle Fishel]

This is Danielle Fishel and Ryder Strong

[Rory Scovel]

from Pod Meets World.

[Danielle Fishel]

As cat parents, Ryder and I know the feeling of being ignored by our cats.

[Rory Scovel]

Cats?

[Danielle Fishel]

I often wonder, does my cat even love me?

[Rory Scovel]

Well, there's only one solution to solve that.

[Jake Mbetta]

Sheba.

[Danielle Fishel]

Feed your cat Sheba and go from feeling ignored to truly adored in 12 days. Guaranteed or your money back.

[Tyler Redick]

Sheba has so many incredible products that

[Josh Dean]

can satisfy even the pickiest eater.

[Danielle Fishel]

Like New Sheba Grilled. Made in the USA with the finest ingredients from around the world, they are savory strips in a succulent sauce that cats are sure to love. And it's 100% complete and balanced with essential vitamins and nutrients for adult cats like my bill. Made without artificial flavors or preservatives. No corn, wheat or soy. To learn more, check out sheba. Com.

[TextNow Announcer]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.