Podcast
Dad Bite
Hosted by Bite Enterprises LLC · EN
Christian and Michelle are living proof that you don't need a license to be a parent. Join them as they discuss the ups and downs of raising their (respective) unfortunate offspring who will likely require therapy after they leave their care.
10episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Ep 24: The Mediator
Oct 7, 202100:28:33Tap to summarizeWelcome back to the nuthouse, Dad Bite listeners! In this crispy Fall episode, special guest "AJ" (Christian's wife) drops in to show us how to split up fights like a pro. We also discuss why someone would be naked from the waist down, why 6-year-olds shouldn't drive (or should they?), and how many fingers a drunk guy can blow off with a roman candle. Finally, Christian regales us with a new segment called, "Dad's F*&% Up Stories."
Transcribe →Ep 23: Dragon Queens and Covid Comebacks (a Spring Story)
Apr 16, 202100:30:19Tap to summarizeIt's all here on Dad Bite's spring finale episode! Special guest "Anka" drops in to help us discuss important social topics like bizarre dreams, drag queen reading hour, and the truth about Santa Claus... not to mention an insightful look at "Only Fans" (porn or not porn?). Join the Dad Bite crew as they embark upon a fantastic sendoff into summer-- we'll see you in the fall!
Transcribe →April Interlude
Apr 5, 202100:01:16Tap to summarizeA short and friendly summer primer from Dad Bite to let you know that a) Summer Break is on its way! and b) we have one more Spring episode to share with you, coming very soon!
Transcribe →Ep 22: Baby Maker
Mar 5, 202100:29:41Tap to summarizeHappy March from Dad Bite! On this round of Dad Bite debauchery, Christian and Michelle have a chat with Christian's brother, Evan, who shows off his new dad skills. Join these three brain-twisted parents as they discuss magical cures to get your kid to sleep, blowing it out of both ends, and smashing Evan's fancy chandelier. And all the while, Evan gets the pressure of his life to-- yes-- make another baby.
Transcribe →Ep 21: You Can Shave Your Baby
Jan 31, 202100:32:10Tap to summarizeIt's the vaccine edition! Professional-drummer-turned-nurse practitioner Adam Navone makes an appearance on Dad Bite to fill us in on the important details, like 1) what it was like to get a covid vaccine shot, 2) fun facts about nature, and 3) whether he has ever given or received an anal swab. Along the way, we discuss whether it's appropriate to shave your baby. Welcome one and all to the judgment free zone... on Dad Bite.
Transcribe →Ep 20: Dad's Tools
Dec 30, 202000:37:40Tap to summarizeIt's a brand new year, but don't think that any of us are going to change: join Christian, Michelle, and guest Amber Albin (Christian's sister/ host of the Really Real Mama podcast) as they delve into the last magical ten months with their families. From illegitimate child Christmas ornaments, to unicorn teachers, to the universal mandate to just sh** on your dad, it's all here so that we can usher in the New Year with grossest stories of humanity. #reallyrealmama, #amberalbin, #christmasornaments, #newyear, #unicornteacher, #dadstools
Transcribe →Ep 19: Stop D***ing Around
Dec 1, 202000:38:25Tap to summarizeHappy Holidays from your twisted friends at Dad Bite! This week's guest, "Ossie," (champion dad and fellow smack talker) helps us weigh in on Dad gifts that are truly bizarre. Christian and Michelle also take a moment to ponder "tender moments," virtual kindergarten recordings we wish we could take back, and more phrases that our kids have picked up that will probably land them in detention. New: Check us out on Podchaser! https://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/dad-bite-909984 twuwpyBSu3Lyt8km7URDtwuwpyBSu3Lyt8km7URDhttps://www.podchaser.com/podcasts/dad-bite-909984
Transcribe →Ep 18: Love and Light
Nov 1, 202000:27:06Tap to summarizeNo one is spared in this special Fall/ November/ Pandemic Fatigue episode. To start, Michelle discusses (and gets slack for) her new love interest; Christian gets a spirit dragon reading; and both of them let loose about kids who won't f--in clean. To top it all off, one of Christian's tiny princesses gives him a scathing review... expressed solely in art.
Transcribe →Ep 17: Numb Nuts
Oct 3, 202000:21:59Tap to summarizeThis is what happens when you're in the middle of a pandemic: sometimes you have find a new guest. Join Christian and Michelle as they find a new guest (while the other one quarantines), all the while discussing what a census worker's liver tastes like, overly sensitive dogs, and first dates at a strip joint (don't worry, we're there for the fried chicken).
Transcribe →Ep 16: Dirty Cookies
Sep 7, 202000:30:51Tap to summarizeAs we launch into the strangest school year on record, Christian and Michelle take a moment to reflect on their respective weaknesses as parents and as people (and there are many). Along the way they reflect on other important topics, like sister wives, the secret to marriage, and the asshole surcharge... and of course, giving someone your dirty cookies.
Transcribe →