EP 445: Let Me Get In Your Unruly Womb (ft. Shelah Marie)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Decisions, Decisions" – EP 445: Let Me Get In Your Unruly Womb (ft. Shelah Marie)

Podcast: Decisions, Decisions
Hosts: Mandii B ("Baby B"), WeezyWTF ("Gila")
Guest: Shelah Marie – Author of Unruly, actress, founder of Curvy Curly Conscious, and host of the Unruly podcast
Release Date: November 3, 2025

---

Episode Overview

In this lively and candid episode, Mandii B and WeezyWTF welcome wellness leader and author Shelah Marie to "Decisions, Decisions." The trio unpacks the complexities of self-worth, relationships, and liberation, while diving into personal stories about dating, healing from trauma, cultural expectations, and boundaries in love and sexuality. With trademark humor and vulnerability, the hosts and guest challenge mainstream narratives about what women "deserve," navigating identity, accountability, and the importance of softness and authenticity in modern relationships.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introducing Shelah Marie and Her Mission

(01:22–04:16)

• Mandii B expresses excitement at hosting Shelah Marie, a long-admired author and advocate.

• Shelah Marie introduces her movement, Curvy Curly Conscious, and her book Unruly—focusing on encouraging women, particularly Black women, to be their authentic selves against constant societal pressures.

  "We live in a world constantly trying to tell women what and who to be ... The best thing you could do is be more of who you are."
  — Shelah Marie (04:16)

2. Debating ‘Deserve’ in Relationships: Self-Worth or Victim-Blaming?

(06:06–19:09)

The Controversial Take

• Mandii B revisits a viral opinion she shared:

  "Everyone is with who they deserve. If you're with someone who isn't that great to you, it's because you don't believe you deserve better." (06:18)

Shelah's Response

• Shelah initially agreed, but after hearing the full context, she realized it risked victim-blaming—especially for survivors of abuse.

• She provides nuance:

  • Abuse often involves power dynamics, financial concerns, and deep psychological manipulation.
  • Leaving abusive situations is highly complex (UN study cited: "the most dangerous place for a woman globally is in her home" 10:04).
  • Abusers exploit those with low self-esteem; abuse is not simply a matter of self-worth or "allowing" mistreatment.

  "If you take it full stop, it can turn into victim blaming ... The most dangerous place for a woman globally is in her home."
  — Shelah Marie (09:41–10:04)

Host Reactions & Further Exploration

• Gila/WeezyWTF points out that therapy and healing require privilege and access.
• The group agrees on the need for accountability, but not at the cost of blaming victims or letting abusers off the hook.
• Mandii clarifies her point is about self-awareness and personal growth, especially as one matures.

3. Black Women, Softness, & Delivery of Advice

(20:06–23:26)

• Shelah expresses frustration over "harshness" in how advice is given to Black women—referencing viral moments (e.g., Crystal from "The Read"):

  "I hate that Black women feel like in order for us to get honest advice, it has to come off so harsh ... Black women really need softness badly from each other."
  — Shelah Marie (23:09)

• Gila discusses how criticism—even by other Black women—can be damaging, especially when regarding motherhood or life choices.

4. Truth or Dare: Sex, Marriage, and Picking Yourself

(26:06–33:45)

• Shelah reflects that her 20-year-old self would be shocked and pleased at how her sex and love life has evolved for the better.

• In her 20s, she felt pressure to center marriage and children; hindsight shows a desire for broader experiences and self-exploration.

• Admits to her own "pick-me" era rooted in low self-esteem, focused on being chosen by men rather than examining mutual value.

  "I was too focused on getting picked. It wasn't like, is this person good for me? ... It was like, how can I prove to this man that I'm worthy?"
  — Shelah Marie (43:07)

• Playful banter about thirst traps and communicating desire in marriage (e.g., using "Super Bowl" as code for sex).

5. Exploring Threesomes, Boundaries, and Sensuality

(33:46–41:16)

• Hosts and guest discuss being propositioned for threesomes—Shelah shares a story about being approached by a woman (“let me get in your womb”) and her discomfort with the aggressive approach.

• Shelah prefers strong boundaries; she isn’t interested in being approached, especially because she doesn’t want to dehumanize others or reduce them to props:

  "If I'm going to engage, I don’t want to consider you ... you would just be a prop to our sexual adventures and I'm not okay with it."
  — Shelah Marie (37:56)

• The group discusses the logistics and emotional difficulty of threesomes, with insights about communication, jealousy, and personal limits.

6. The "Pick-Me" Complex, Good Sex, and Growing Up

(41:31–46:26)

• Discussion on how low self-esteem and "pick-me" attitudes are fueled by cultural and personal factors (e.g., early experiences with “first fine guy,” “first guy with money,” or “good dick”).
• Multiple anecdotes about youthful self-sacrifice for male attention—emphasizing self-validation and boundary formation as women age.

7. Ayesha Curry, Michelle Obama, and Publicly Voicing Needs

(47:42–56:06)

• Group responds to a viral male podcaster criticizing Ayesha Curry for expressing insecurity and desire for validation.

• Shelah calls out society’s obsession with shaming women no matter their choices:

  "People who have internalized misogyny, no matter your gender, love shaming women. ... The whole game is, how do I shame women’s choices?"
  — Shelah Marie (50:17)

• The hosts argue for the importance of platforms for women to safely express relationship struggles, insisting that healthy relationships are built on openness and mutual understanding.

• Mandii and Sheila also discuss double standards around thirst traps and attention—from both sides of a partnership.

8. Nudes, Validation, and Playfulness in Modern Dating

(56:41–59:20)

• The group shares their approaches to sending nudes, flirting, and getting affirmation from partners and followers—sometimes with creative, tongue-in-cheek methods.
• Humor and honesty about negotiating sex and love in the digital age.

9. Unruly Retreats, Radical Self-Love, and Building Safe Spaces

(60:05–64:46)

• Shelah explains the origin of her Unruly retreats—a safe space for Black women to practice radical self-love, often in liberating settings like clothing-optional resorts (cue hilarious reveal that she didn't know what Hedonism was when first booking!).

  "We were so sad the last day to have to put clothes back on ... it was just so freeing."
  — Shelah Marie (61:17)

• The retreats emphasize community, acceptance, and joy—serving as a counterpoint to exclusion and trauma.

• Upcoming retreats in Ghana and Thailand are announced.

---

Notable Quotes

• On Deserve and Abuse:

  "Abusers don't typically go after people who have a lot [of] confidence, you have a lot of self-esteem. They go with people who already have these holes, ... and then break you down even further."
  — Shelah Marie (10:32)

• On Softness & Sisterhood:

  "Black women really need softness badly from each other."
  — Shelah Marie (23:09)

• On Picking Yourself:

  "At some point, when do you put you first? When do you stop chasing them and want the life that you should live? When do you find your power?"
  — Mandii B (19:29)

• On Being Approached for Threesomes:

  "I don't want to consider you ... you would just be a prop to our ... sexual adventures, and I'm not okay with it."
  — Shelah Marie (37:56)

• On Defying Criticism:

  "People who have internalized misogyny ... love shaming women. If she's dressed, if she's not ... has kids, doesn't ... is sexual, or not, ... you can find whatever tool you want. The whole game is, how do I shame women's choices?"
  — Shelah Marie (50:17)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [04:16] – Shelah Marie explains her movement and book
• [06:06–19:09] – "Deserve" in relationships and accountability vs. victim-blaming
• [20:06–23:09] – The call for more softness and gentleness among Black women
• [26:06–33:45] – Truth/Dare and the evolution from "pick-me" to self-prioritizing
• [33:46–41:16] – Navigating boundaries in non-traditional sex and threesomes
• [47:42–56:06] – Publicly voicing needs in relationships (Ayesha Curry, Michelle Obama discussions)
• [60:05–64:46] – Details about Unruly retreats and radical self-love

---

Memorable Moments

• The Super Bowl Code:
  Shelah and her husband use "Super Bowl" as a playful, discreet code word for wanting sex—especially with their teen stepdaughter in the house. (32:15)
• Horse Whispering:
  Shelah describes her quirky interests, including telepathic communication with horses. (27:49)
• Hedonism Mishap:
  Shelah realizes (after booking her first retreat) that Hedonism was more than just "clothing-optional." (60:14)
• Nudes as Art:
  Gila describes sending nudes that double as home décor showcases:

  "I'll hold my leg up ... and be like, do you like my new plant?" (58:12)

---

Tone & Style

The conversation is open, unfiltered, humorous, and sprinkled with playful banter. The podcast maintains an atmosphere of authenticity, mutual respect, and a commitment to challenging societal norms, with all speakers foregrounding the importance of truth-telling, personal joy, and community for Black women.

---

Resources & Plugs

• Find Shelah Marie: @theshelahmarie on Instagram
• Book: Unruly: A Guide for Black Women to Uncover Your Truest Story
• Retreats: Ghana (December), Thailand (March 2026); details on Shelah’s IG.
• Mandii and Weezy’s Book: No Holds Barred: A Dual Manifesto of Sexual Exploration and Power
• Patreon: patreon.com/horribledecisions for extended/NSFW discussions

---

This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in the intersections of sex, self-worth, race, and liberation—especially for Black women navigating love and authenticity in a complicated world.

Transcript

[Sheila Marie]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Better Picks Ad]

Nothing in life is free except this $10 that better picks is offering. Download the Better app, pick more or less on your favorite player's stats, watch the games, and win some cash. It's that simple. Must be 21 or older in a jurisdiction where Better Picks operates terms and conditions. Play Better Picks. Sports just got better.

[Gila]

Welcome to Decisions Decision.

[Baby B]

I don't think you should say Decisions, Decisions. It sounded like you was talking to this person.

[Gila]

You definitely say the welcome.

[Baby B]

Welcome to the new podcast.

[Gila]

Oh, wait, you want to say it together?

[Baby B]

Decisions, Decisions. Welcome, everybody, to this is yours. This is yours. It is your girl. Oh, my God.

[Gila]

I can't do it.

[Baby B]

I don't know. It is yours. It is your girl. It's your girl, Baby B. AKA that beach.

[Sheila Marie]

Hola.

[Gila]

Mucho gusto, Marie.

[Sheila Marie]

Hello, everybody. Thank you so much.

[Baby B]

Okay, see, that's all we do.

[Gila]

Hold on, Artura.

[Baby B]

All right, y', all, y'.

[Sheila Marie]

All.

[Baby B]

Welcome to another episode of Decision Decisions. We are really, really glad to introduce our guests for this episode. Now, y' all be acting like y' all don't like us, but y' all about to like her, and y' all about to be fans, because I have been standing her a long time, and I'm really glad that we finally got the chance to bring her on the pod, y'.

[Guest or Listener]

All.

[Baby B]

We have Sheila Marie, who is an actress, author of Unruly, founder of the Curvy Curly Conscious movement, and host of the Unruly podcast with Sheila.

[Gila]

Sorry.

[Sheila Marie]

That's okay.

[Baby B]

It's spelled Sheila, Shayla.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah, but it's Sheila.

[Baby B]

Sheila.

[Gila]

Oh, Sheila.

[Baby B]

Let me love it till the morning comes. Okay, now YouTube may now demonetize us because we sounded too good there.

[Gila]

Oh, damn.

[Baby B]

I mean.

[Gila]

So welcome, girl. My name is Gila. My name. And so my whole life I've been singing that.

[Baby B]

That's crazy.

[Gila]

And I get mad when men don't sing it to me.

[Baby B]

Well, there's a. There's a song about Mandy, too, and I.

[Gila]

What is it?

[Baby B]

Mandy Candy or something? Oh.

[Gila]

You do that?

[Baby B]

No, no, no, no. There's an actual song about Mandy. You. I mean, I think it's white people, but you know the Mandy song.

[Guest or Listener]

I don't.

[Baby B]

Damn. There's a whole Mandy song. Only white older men know.

[Guest or Listener]

Brooklyn.

[Baby B]

We're not gonna do that, y'.

[Sheila Marie]

All.

[Baby B]

And we do not have Ed in here with us. But we have a king as our. As our penis for the conversation.

[Gila]

Not a talking dicks ahead.

[Baby B]

Like what? Like South Park. Oh, my God, I love that. They put eyes on Trump's dick. On the lil dick, bro. It is great. Do you know. Hold on. Do you know if ever we need to put anything on tv, you got a show or a cartoon or a post. Allegedly. The way around showing a dick on tv, you have to make it a character. So what south park did was put eyeballs on the dick and made it talk. So now you could have the dick on tv because now it's technically a character. It's not a dick.

[Sheila Marie]

I know it was small, bro.

[Baby B]

It's so small. I know they have the dick like this. It's like 3 centimeters. And that's the whole premise, that he got a little dick and he be sleeping with Satan. It's crazy. They turned Trump into Saddam Hussein.

[Gila]

Isn't he already Satan?

[Baby B]

No, no, no. He's right. No shit. No. The Cheeto is dating Satan and they done made his little peewee into a character.

[Gila]

I don't think. Melania. Satan. Anyways, Sheila, welcome.

[Baby B]

Welcome to the pod. We gotta get into. You are also an author, so we'll start off by letting people know a little bit about you before you attempt to read me for filth. Because she requested a certain read to me out the gate. But go ahead and let's be nice first. Let's be nice. Let's be nice first. So talk to us about your book and what the curvy curly conscious movement is.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes. So it's just very simple. We live in a world that is constantly trying to tell women what and who to be. And I'm just saying the best thing you could do is be, you know, be more of who you are. In the words of one of my favorite thinkers, Ebony, Janiece, shout out to my dog, she told me the other day, like, Sheila, your only job is to be more of who you are. And it sounds simple and it sounds cliche, but it's actually very difficult when you constantly get messages that are telling you to be other than who you are. So that's another reason why I love y', all, because I feel like you invite women to be more of who they are by exploring the fringes. Like, you know, I do want to.

[Gila]

Tell y', all, too.

[Baby B]

We sitting across this. This. The conversation, this pod, you know, Weezy and I live differently currently as a partner, and I'm partnered with a lot of n. But you are married, you are monogamous, you are a mother. So we're gonna get the perspective from somebody with a different lived experience. So I'm really excited about that. And I guess out the gate. I'm here for the conversation of you to read me or attempt to. Cause I have. I did not say I read y'. All. First off, she took pre notes for.

[Gila]

An argument that didn't happen.

[Baby B]

Well, no, no, no. Because I asked her. I said, girl, you finally coming on. Is there anything that you're talking about right now that you would like to talk about? Sex, dating, relationships?

[Gila]

Ah, ah, ah, ah.

[Baby B]

Um. And she was like, no, I'm cool with, like, you know, going with the flow. And she said, actually, there's one thing that you said, um, and I didn't like it. And so I'd like to talk about it on the. On. Mind you, I don't know what her take is, but I'm gonna say the clip, because many of you have had thoughts and opinions about. Was about our visit to the Breakfast Club during the week of our book release, where I went into saying that as people, whoever you are, you are in the relationship that you deserve. I'm gonna play the clip.

[Gila]

Oh, yes, I remember.

[Baby B]

I'm gonna play the clip for reference and so that you guys know what she ain't like. Cause I do think, like. And this is gonna sound bad, I do think everyone is with who they deserve.

[Gila]

What do you mean?

[Baby B]

If you're with someone who isn't that great to you, it's because you don't believe you deserve better. And so. And I've been talking to this a lot with. With. So I had this recent conversation. I went to Malta, and I'm sitting around a group of women, and we're talking about the Diddy trial. And what happens is these women start sharing all of these abusive relationships that they were in, and they talk about how they didn't feel safe even to share with the men in their lives, because the men in their lives were like, well, if. If he touch you, if he do this, I'm going to jail, because I'm gonna come. And so I shared this story online, and it was so sad how many men were like, yeah, but then we step in and they stay. So then what? And I'm just like, whoa. Basically even saying, like, how do you know you stayed too long? Everyone in certain relationships, I feel like they deserve it, because it's like, if you don't want better for yourself, no one can lead you out of it. You could take a horse to water, but you can't make him drink it. And so I do think that if you're in a bad relationship or not, you don't feel like, you deserve more. You're in a relationship. You deserve. And so, like, literally, in the book, I talk about being like, oh, girl, you ain't have no self worth for yourself. Oh, you was desperate. Oh, you were insecure. And I think it takes a lot of time for women to say those words about themselves. And so until you're able to do that, the person you're with is probably more of a reflection of who you are. Would love to know your response to that clip first.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes.

[Baby B]

And then I'll deeper explain my sentiments because I stand on this tick.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay. Period. So I'm going to tell you how. How it happened. First of all, I'm just a fan. I love bold women. So, like, I be.

[Baby B]

I'm.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm also Aries. So I'm just, like, impulsive.

[Baby B]

So I.

[Sheila Marie]

Exist. So I. I, like, I was listening to the video and I was distracted, so I was doing two things at once. So I just heard you say, oh, everybody's in the relationship that you deserve. If you're with a partner, you know, whatever, you're getting the treatment that you deserve. And I, like, I commented before the video was done, so it was, you know, you. You comment before the shoes. So I was like, oh, my God, yes, period. Like, and I tagged you or whatever or something like that. And you responded. I was like, period. I went on about my day, my phone, my deal's blowing up.

[Baby B]

Oh.

[Sheila Marie]

I said, what's going on? I look, they're like, sheila, is this what you support? They're like, I'm disappointing. I said, oh, my God. Hold on. What happened? What happened, y'? All? I went back and I listened to the rest of the video, and I was like, oh, Lord, let me take my. Like that. Hold on. You know, you're like, move too quick, bitch.

[Gila]

I'd be liking a photo. And then when you swipe the photo, it's something else.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah. Oh, never mind.

[Baby B]

Okay, so when you continued listening, because I am. I want to make sure we include.

[Sheila Marie]

What I didn't like. Yes. I'm say what I agree, what I don't agree with. I do agree to a degree that you get the partner you deserve. I like, I'm in the wellness space. So energetic spiritual principles. Absolutely. We do match. We get our energetic match in our reality and with the people that we interact with. However, I think you got to take that with a grain of salt, because if you take it full stop, it can turn into victim blaming. And I work with exclusively women. I myself have been in abusive relationships. I work with women, abusive relationships have ruined their life. And like, what we know about abusive, I think that abuse is just not understood. And being like, well, if she don't want to leave, if she don't want better for herself, why do I care? Is to me a very dangerous take.

[Baby B]

Okay?

[Sheila Marie]

Because women in abusive situations, it's first of all financially, does she have the finances to leave? Is she being abused financially? Does that person have control over her credit or her accounts? Like, you know, does she even have money for herself, all these things, is she safe? Is she actually worried about the safety of the people around her herself? The U.N. i think just released a study that the most dangerous place for a woman globally is in her home. So the danger could be very real. So there's a reason why it takes seven times on average before a woman can really leave an abusive situation. And then to me, the most damning part is like the psychological aspect. Like, to me, so I've been very open about this. Like, I come from a history of having very low self esteem. And so abusers don't typically go after people who have a lot confidence, you have a lot of self esteem, they know who to go after. They go with people who already have these holes. They already have these like, you know, these little holes that they can latch on to and then break you down even further. And so I remember when I was in an abusive relationship, I. I lost all trust in myself. Like, I didn't know if I thought, like, is that, is that light really white? Well, I don't know. I don't know. Anyway, do I, do I want to go left or. I don't know anyway, I'm stupid. I'm stupid. Like, you internalize all of this to the point where you distrust all of your intuition, all of your impulses, which makes leaving so difficult. You also don't even know because this person might have been told you. Like I have been told in the past, you would never be nothing without me.

[Baby B]

Oh, I've been told that too.

[Sheila Marie]

Right. Like, you need me. You need me. So you start to believe that. So I was just like, I just gotta address it with my dog. Because I'm like, you know, you have a lot of women that listen to you have a huge platform and in that platform are some. And this was right around the time the Cassie thing was in.

[Baby B]

Yeah, yeah, I think that that's why we were talking about it.

[Sheila Marie]

And that's exactly right. And so it's just like you probably have a lot of survivors of abuse listening to you.

[Gila]

Did you mean it?

[Baby B]

I guess. No, no, I. No, I think that that's where the conversation led because he was. He was in court. He was in court right there. I don't think it was Cassie. Or maybe I could have been talking about Cassie, I guess, and I do, because I. At first I was like, damn, that was the wrong word. But I did look up the definition of deserve. And it's to do something or have or show qualities worthy of either reward or punishment. And so for me, having even this book and talking about how I was insecure in what I allowed to happen because of my insecurity to be in a place of lacking self worth, to me, we are. I do find us to be accountable and responsible for how we live the one life that we have. And I talk about it all the time. We could believe that we've been here before and that we gonna be here in an afterlife, but. But we don't know those versions of ourselves, right? And so for me, in what we believe everyone deserves, we think we. We believe that everyone deserves a. A living wage. Right? Do they have a job that pays that to them? No. And that's not necessarily their fault. In essence, however it could be. Did you go and get an education? Did you go and get anything that could lead you to a better job? And yes, we can talk about how these states still just don't pay us a living wage while rents go up, groceries go up. I understand. What I was saying is until you reach the relationship with yourself, which is maybe why I was able to say that I reached a point in my life to where as soon as a man isn't giving me what I want, because I now know I deserve it, I now know I'm worthy of it, I'm in the control to do that. And so as a person who is being manipulated, possibly in a psychosis with this person, a lot of those stem from insecurities, stems from lack of worth, stems from generational trauma or things that they haven't gotten through with therapy. I've been in therapy for four years. I don't even like to be that therapy bitch because I'm not the mental health asshole, because I still got things that I'm working on too. But when I say that, it's not to victim blame, it's to literally be like as a person, wherever you're at, in the space of how you value yourself, your one life, you as a human being, you taking accountability for what you allow into your ecosystem, your world, the person around you, to me, you deserve what you're getting. Because if you haven't done the work, if you don't care about yourself, if you're continuing to live with your insecurities, you're constantly going to get exactly that.

[Gila]

I actually agreed with you before this take. Like I thought before you made more sense. Now I disagree.

[Baby B]

Okay.

[Gila]

Because the thing is, therapy and healing is a privilege. Like, no one knows they're in a bad situation until they're gone. So you can't just say, pick yourself up and go to therapy. Pick yourself up and fix it.

[Baby B]

Oh, I didn't say that.

[Gila]

But. But you are, though.

[Baby B]

No, I'm saying work, which is, I did the work.

[Gila]

We. We all have re like, okay, maybe you don't have money, but find the resources. Like, nah.

[Baby B]

To me, we can't get on the Internet all day long every day and talk about, as women, what we deserve, how we should be treated as women, how we're these mothers, how we're nurturing. We can't express as women all the ways in which we know to be powerful and monumental and these beings while letting a nigga slap us, while letting, like, there's things hold on. And this is not victim blaming. One moment, let me finish. Because there's a right and wrong as people, we know what's right and wrong. We know what's healthy and unhealthy. And it could be subjective. However, we. We know in terms of women, we don't want to fight. We know as women, we. We would like a bigger home. Like, even. Even in terms of. I don't even want to keep this in abuse.

[Gila]

Abusive relationships aren't getting. Aren't, aren't with these wealthy men systemically. Like, we can't say, want a bigger home or want these things.

[Baby B]

No, no, no, no. This was. I was just trying to remove it from abuse because I don't want to seem like I'm victim blaming. I've been in a relationship where I went back 13 times and had PTSD afterwards. I understand it. But what I also realized is at the time, I didn't feel worthy of any think that he was the best thing I could have until I. Until I formed a relationship with myself where I had a voice to want more, to speak up, to actually be like, this is not the treatment you deserve. You deserve better. And until you get it, you would rather be with nobody. And. Which is. I sat here for a year and was like, I don't need a man. I don't want a man.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes. And though. Yes. And because the whole rhetoric of being like, I got what I deserve, because I don't think I deserve more, really. It just lets abusers off the hook. That type of rhetoric just supports more abuse. Lets abusers off the hook and then.

[Baby B]

It makes all them niggas need to go to jail.

[Sheila Marie]

They feel worse because they're like, well, damn, I'm choosing this. I'm like, it just, it just to.

[Baby B]

Me, by the way, I believe in the death penalty. I believe certain niggas don't need to be out of jail. Like, it's a. Yes. And you just said it. Yes and I agree. I believe in niggas going to jail. I don't believe that if a man molested you or raped you, and I don't know how far we are under YouTube, so you might have to bleep those things. I, I think the, there's no money that should even suffice for that. I believe in men doing the time being. There's. There's consequences for your behavior. If you lay your hands on a bitch, if you sexually assault a woman. I believe in there being hardcore punishment for those behaviors as well. Right.

[Gila]

But like it's a yes and okay.

[Baby B]

Correct. Yes and. But I don't want to believe I'm letting them go.

[Gila]

The larger issue though is placing too much accountability on a woman for picking it up.

[Sheila Marie]

I agree.

[Gila]

Because in the previous clip, you, you didn't really say that. I was like, oh, yeah, okay. Like I actually agree. But this part of taking healing and taking power back, people aren't even close to there. So like I've been in an emotional abusive relationship like you, but also a physical one. And the physical one is super different because it's a different type of fear. The emotional one is a self esteem thing. The physical one. Yet I don't know if you can relate, but it's a fear of like speaking, doing something wrong. Whereas emotional is like, I don't want.

[Baby B]

To get left or I don't want.

[Gila]

To like have him talk shit to me. The physical one is a little bit deeper and I think once your brain is there and I was only 19, do I think it could happen to me today? No, because I know I don't deserve those things. But then I didn't deserve it either. Like there was. My brain wasn't even fully developed. I was like literally in the workings of becoming a woman. Get it? Going through the weeds and this man was molding me.

[Baby B]

No, no one does that. And that's, I think the out turnal thing. I don't think Anyone deserves that. Okay, let's be very clear, okay? No one deserves to get their ass beat. No one deserves to be sexually assaulted. No one deserves the harm.

[Sheila Marie]

That's kind of what it gave. That's why.

[Baby B]

No, no, no. No One deserves that. From an outer lens, however, and maybe I do place too much accountability on people, period. Men and women to just be better, to learn themselves, to get the help. Like, we can't have a book to talking about how we regained our power without talking about how we got to regaining our power.

[Sheila Marie]

I feel you. I feel you. But absolutely, I know you didn't want to put abuse in there, but it's in there. But when it comes to abuse is really not. It's really not the same.

[Baby B]

There's the cheating best, which is why I said I. My mind sometimes. I guess that's what it is. A king. I know. I talked about it in Patreon. My mind works faster than my mouth, and so sometimes there's a lot of thoughts going on in my mind, and when I'm talking, it just all comes out, even though one thought doesn't relate to the next. And then I'm saying it, and now I got to double back. And so that's what. That's what that was. I did not mean to tie that story into what I was saying, but I did.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay, great. That. That was my only thing. See, it was nothing.

[Baby B]

No, no, no, no, no, no. This was. This was great dialogue.

[Sheila Marie]

Awesome. I love it.

[Baby B]

Dialogue. I do want to be very clear. Not victim blaming again, no holds barred, unruly. To me, if you read books, there's. There's a thing that no one shared about really getting into your 30s. Right. And where you talk about how you showed up in a relationship at 19, how I show up in the book in my 20s with men. It's embarrassing. And so having gone through those things when you're in your 30s, which mostly is when I start calling bitches out on their behavior. Like, girl, don't you know better by now? So being 35 now is just like, okay, at some point, when do you put you first? When do you stop chasing them in? When do you want to live the life that you should live? When do you find your power?

[Sheila Marie]

You know what? This actually makes me think of something that I wasn't originally thinking to say, but it. It ties into. I don't know if I'm. Maybe you have to cut this. I don't know if I'm allowed to. Am I allowed to bring up another crystal? Am I Allowed to bring up another podcast. Yes.

[Baby B]

So Crystal ain't Crystal. That's crazy.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, it is Crystal.

[Gila]

So sorry.

[Sheila Marie]

No, no disrespect, Crystal.

[Baby B]

We just like, we just talked about this on.

[Sheila Marie]

Because I was just. Oh my God, all the. All the Internet talking about the cardi b take and everything. And my main takeaway was like, damn, I hate that black women feel like in order for us to get honest advice, it has to come off so harsh. That's my only thing.

[Baby B]

Like delivery.

[Sheila Marie]

The lady on TikTok with the fitness, she be on live like, well, you need to. You need to eat, sleep. That's what you need to. You know, you're eating too much. Go to sleep. Like, you know, I don't know.

[Gila]

Pilates by Raven, which I would love to talk about.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, we can get it to that.

[Gila]

Too, cuz she's a doo bird.

[Sheila Marie]

She.

[Gila]

Oh, now, too harsh. Raven Pilates by Raven, dumbass. You got your black woman ass up there and said it's not supposed to be accessible. Do you go to BGA and say, where are the black people? You stupid. Actually, that's exactly what the fashion industry does. And it is perpetually why we continue to see African faces. We continue to see people with DEI getting angry. It's why Target has no fucking money and their CEO stepped down, you stupid bitch. It's why Solidcore literally has a black female comedian. Snl. I'm losing her name right now. Ego. I think it's ego. Like, are you dumb, bitch Police. Okay, Paul lovers, the reason that your.

[Sheila Marie]

We are so harsh with each other.

[Gila]

It'S because we needed to see a black woman.

[Baby B]

I get that. That delirium was crazy.

[Gila]

She has to have a white man.

[Baby B]

But with Crystal, I do want to say the show is the read.

[Sheila Marie]

Exactly.

[Baby B]

If you listen to the one of.

[Sheila Marie]

The ones that was out there, I.

[Baby B]

Was about to say, you read. They read everybody. They done came for my good girl Summer Walker every time she done had a baby and tatted the nigga Larry on her face.

[Sheila Marie]

It's very inconsistent.

[Baby B]

It's satirical for them to read people with that delivery. I think it got to the TikTok.

[Sheila Marie]

Word and they just.

[Baby B]

Again, she. She's read Summer Walker. She has read. They read Chris Brown every goddamn other day. But they have read. They have read Charlie Kirk.

[Gila]

Cool.

[Baby B]

Deserves it. So I guess that's another thing.

[Gila]

But no, no, no, no, no. The read of the dating wasn't bad. Actually. I think it was the child choice, like talking about making the choice to have children. That being the read from a woman. That's the part to me that was unfair. Dragging Cardi for dating a fault like that was funny.

[Baby B]

Okay, I, I, I honestly don't mind me don't want to stay here too long because we did talk about this in another episode.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, let's go. So anyway, the point is. Oh, yeah. I say the harshness of. Yes, that's, that's my point. Like, I have less thoughts on if she's writing. Da da. My main points is like, damn, I hate. And this is why I feel like I'm not as popular as some other people, because I just, I do not give.

[Baby B]

Because he's too nice.

[Sheila Marie]

Not even nice. That's like, nice is phony. Nice is performative. Like, nice is like, oh, hi. Like, not, not nice when you can't get that.

[Baby B]

Yeah.

[Sheila Marie]

But I just feel like black women really need softness badly from each other. And I think, like, even just all the advice we give to each other, all the feedback, you know, well, you shouldn't have been there. You shouldn't have been there. You should know better. When I listened to her, her thoughts, I'm like, this sound like my auntie. This is how my aunties would talk.

[Gila]

When, you know, Cardi was really soft back. Yeah.

[Sheila Marie]

And I think it hurt. Some of it.

[Gila]

I think it's hurtful because I'm, I'm assuming Cardi's heard of the Read. Like, the Read is so iconic, right?

[Baby B]

Like, nah, she, she called her Chrysler.

[Gila]

Oh, I don't think she's.

[Baby B]

Well, she.

[Gila]

Well, maybe that was to be funny, but Cardi's petty. Because I'm a Cardi.

[Baby B]

Cardi is petty. Cardi is petty.

[Guest or Listener]

She got a song called Petty.

[Baby B]

Pretty and petty, bitch. That's what I am.

[Gila]

But yeah, I think it hurts to hear another black woman talking about how you show up as a mom. Actually, the worst thing to me was like.

[Sheila Marie]

And by the way, I just want to clarify. People run with it. When I say black women, I'm referring to Chris talking. Just that is a delivery. I'm not calling Cardi black because I don't want to get into that debate. People be like, she black. She not black. She not we.

[Gila]

It's a destruction. Cardi not black.

[Sheila Marie]

I don't even care.

[Gila]

Aren't you black, Ms. Cubana? Like, I'm tired of this already. You not show me Cardi ain't black.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm not, I'm not gonna touch it.

[Baby B]

Yeah, I'm not. She's not African American.

[Sheila Marie]

It'll take.

[Gila]

She's Not African American, but she's still black.

[Baby B]

Yeah, well that's the convers. It's more about her roots. We're not going to get into that here.

[Annabe Sofas Ad]

Time for a sofa upgrade. Introducing Annabe sofas where designer style meets budget friendly prices. Every Annabe sofa is modular, allowing you to rearrange your space effortlessly. Perfect for both small and large spaces, Annabe is the only machine washable sofa inside and out. Say goodbye to stainless steel and messes with liquid and stain resistant fabrics that make cleaning easy. Liquids simply slide right off. Designed for custom comfort, our high resilience foam lets you choose between a sink in feel or a supportive memory foam blend. Plus our pet friendly stain resistant fabrics ensure your sofa stays beautiful for years. Don't compromise quality. For price, visit washablesofas.com to upgrade your living space. Today sofas start at just $699 with no risk returns and a 30 day money back guarantee. Get early access to Black Friday now. The biggest sale of the year can save you up to 60% off plus free shipping and free returns. Shop [e-mail] Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Better Picks Ad]

Do you like free money? Well, today's your lucky day. Better Picks is offering a free $10 just for signing up. Download the Better app, pick more or less on player stats, watch the games and win some cash. It's that simple. Better Picks is available in 33 states including Texas, California and Georgia. Download the Better app today. That's better. B E T R and get a free $10. No deposit necessary. Must be 21 or older. In a jurisdiction where Better Picks operates, terms and conditions apply. Better Picks Sports just got better.

[Baby B]

We have something called Truth and Air. Because you don't get to choose, you have to do both. And so the truth. I'm going to lean into something a bit more, you know, subtle, but the dare be ready. Okay. So for the truth, sheila, what would 20 year old you say about your love and sex life that is now, you know, completely different than what 30s year old you would say One more time. What would 20 year old you say about how you're navigating dating, love, sex, your sex life? I talked about mine in the book and then compared to now 30s, sex, love, dating, life.

[Sheila Marie]

She would think it gets so much better.

[Baby B]

Okay.

[Sheila Marie]

She would think like, oh this ain't nothing.

[Baby B]

20S. She would think she would know it gets better.

[Guest or Listener]

Yes.

[Baby B]

Okay.

[Sheila Marie]

If twenties, if twenty year old me could see me now, she'd be like, oh, this lit.

[Baby B]

Okay, she Would be happy with it.

[Sheila Marie]

I love it.

[Baby B]

Okay. Do you think in your 20s, you. You what? What is one thing in your 20s you were sadly mistaken about? And you, you learned later.

[Gila]

Were you married in your 22?

[Guest or Listener]

No.

[Sheila Marie]

Hell no. Oh, my gosh. Literally. And I feel like I'm still doing this to this day. In my 20s, I wish I would have de centered the idea of marriage and children more. Oh, sooner so much.

[Gila]

That's what you really want to say. You want to say you want it.

[Baby B]

To be a hoe, but let me.

[Sheila Marie]

Let me have the option, because I could be a hoe. I could go out and be a monk. I could go out and be a ninja warrior. I don't fucking know. Like, I could do whatever. We could do it. I like all that type of hair. I some quirky stuff. You see, I'm getting to all. I've done a lot of horse whispering. Like, I like weird stuff.

[Baby B]

Wait, what is horse whispering? You don't whisper.

[Sheila Marie]

Horses are telepathic, girl. Like, I told a horse to sit down. I ain't going. You go look in your mind. You have to. When you do it one day, cuz you will. I want you to text me. Okay. I told the horse the lady was training us, and she said, okay, now just look in his eyes and tell him to sit down. And I did. And that horse sat down. I was shook. And it all type of thing like, she's like, horses can read you that.

[Baby B]

That horse specifically was deaf.

[Gila]

I felt that.

[Baby B]

No, that horse was dead. That horse was deaf. And they had went ahead and found different ways to sign up.

[Sheila Marie]

No, they are.

[Gila]

They heard the octopus after we watched the teacher. Listen, I didn't eat octopus for six months.

[Baby B]

Wait, what happened?

[Sheila Marie]

Calamari. Anyway.

[Baby B]

Wait, girl, that's nasty.

[Sheila Marie]

It's not an elephant. No, it's a baby octopus.

[Baby B]

No, it's squid.

[Sheila Marie]

No, it's a baby. It look like a little octopus.

[Baby B]

It looked like.

[Gila]

They're all authors. It's crazy. It's actually kind of mindful.

[Sheila Marie]

That's okay. We don't have nigga shit.

[Baby B]

What's the nigga shit?

[Guest or Listener]

First time I ever had calamari, I was with a bunch of white people and I didn't know what I was eating. I thought it was when I tasted. I was like, why is the onion rings? I was like, why is it so.

[Baby B]

Tough you thinking it was onion rings? Mike, you weren't saying I wasn't cultured then.

[Guest or Listener]

I wasn't cultured.

[Baby B]

Okay.

[Sheila Marie]

But anyway, I like. I liked. I'm Just saying, you could also be a hoe, but you could do whatever. You had a whole face do all the things I'm saying. What I'm saying is exactly what we got to. It's like in my 20s, I think I had such a narrow idea of what was possible for my life. Oh, my gosh. I have to graduate. I have to get married and have to have kids. Like, there are a billion things you can do. You could grow up and be a astronaut. I don't know. You can save dogs and have an ethical kennel. Like, you know what I'm saying? Get creative.

[Baby B]

Yeah.

[Gila]

What was the most important, important out of kids, man, Children or college? Like, what was the thing that you were like out of anything? This is what I need.

[Sheila Marie]

I just wanted to be picked. Oh, I told y' all I had low self esteem.

[Baby B]

Damn.

[Sheila Marie]

At the time.

[Baby B]

I love an admitting. Pick me, girl.

[Sheila Marie]

I was a pick me.

[Baby B]

What things would you say showed up that you knew I was being a pick me?

[Sheila Marie]

That I.

[Baby B]

Sorry, girl, we getting deep here. I.

[Gila]

Everyone's been there.

[Baby B]

Come on, hold her up.

[Gila]

Listen, we will all give one too. Do you want to do it in solidarity?

[Sheila Marie]

No, I don't mind. I'm not ashamed of it. It's okay. So I was. I mean, have we all dated at some point? So I'm definitely. I'm married to a real rapper right now.

[Baby B]

And.

[Sheila Marie]

And have we all in the past had a little aspiring Ace Hood?

[Gila]

I didn't know.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, that's okay. I love when people don't.

[Gila]

You're Ace Hood's wife.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah. I love when people don't know because that means you know me.

[Gila]

No. Okay. In my brain now, the photos of the family are connected.

[Baby B]

Okay, so you see, I didn't want to introduce you as that because you your own woman.

[Sheila Marie]

Thank you.

[Baby B]

You your own woman.

[Gila]

When we interviewed Sariah, that' all I could think about.

[Baby B]

Saraya Sera, Joey Badass's partner. See and see. And I was. We can't do that.

[Gila]

But you know what it is? It's just the images on ig, so for me, I don't lead between the images on IG I've seen of Ace Hood's wife. I'm doing that in quotation for people listening. But seeing your page or seeing your work is something separate.

[Baby B]

Oh, I'll be honest. Can I be honest? Actually, before we get into your pick me mode, when I first saw your page, I was actually mad you had a nigga or I thought maybe y' all was looking for a girlfriend. Cuz that girl, that body. I don't know if, like, I did want to fuck a long time, but you are still married. And I was. I've been waiting for you to, like, not.

[Sheila Marie]

You want to take me down.

[Baby B]

Y' all go see Sheila stage.

[Gila]

You do.

[Baby B]

You do. Like, you are the. You are the most innocent, thirst trapping ass bitch on the Internet that I've come across. Your body's like, don't look. You don't have to look at it, but it's there. She just be walking past the camera like, bitch, you know what you're doing. It's there. It is there. Maybe you just can't get. I was like, damn, you're funny.

[Sheila Marie]

We have been approached about that a lot, I'm sure. Well, I'm glad I wasn't one of those.

[Gila]

Y' all both got sexy hair, bro.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm just like, I love women so much. I'm always around women. They're always like, well, wait a minute. They're like, well, do you. You love being around. I'm like, okay, all right.

[Gila]

Let'S get into that.

[Baby B]

Oh, wait.

[Gila]

I was.

[Baby B]

I was about to. Literally. That was gonna be the dare. I wanted you to. To, like, tell us what the text message would be to him asking for sex tonight.

[Sheila Marie]

Me?

[Baby B]

Yes.

[Sheila Marie]

What I would say to him, like.

[Baby B]

To let him know you want him to dig in your guts. Like, what is. What does that sound like?

[Sheila Marie]

We have a little joke. I'm sorry. We have a little joke. Like, I don't know where it started, but we started doing this thing of, like. I don't know if it was one day. I was like, oh, you. You look like you. You know, you could be an athlete. I say, you look like an athlete. You like a little sexy little football player. I'm like, you look like you won a Super Bowl. You won the super bowl, so you're a Super bowl champ. So if I say. If I say I'll text him, I'll be like, bae, you won the Super Bowl. He'll be like, hell, yeah. He'll give me a fake score. Like, yeah, we da da, da. We up. I'm like, oh, we gotta celebrate.

[Baby B]

He's so cute.

[Sheila Marie]

So that's that. That's what I would say.

[Baby B]

And that gets you to know y' all fucking at night.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, yeah.

[Baby B]

Because you're celebrating the Super Bowl.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah, he'll just walk around the house because, you know, his daughter live with us, so we can't say, she is so cute. That little outfit, that's my baby. That's my baby. Damn. Both of them. So if, you know, we can't say stuff, you know, she's very observant. So he'll just be like, babe, is the super bowl on a night? I'll be like, it is on the night. And you won.

[Baby B]

Hold on.

[Gila]

Yeah.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm not gonna lie.

[Better Picks Ad]

Wait a minute.

[Gila]

I love this, but how is she?

[Sheila Marie]

She's 14.

[Gila]

Yeah. You got one more year, wheezy.

[Guest or Listener]

I'm with you. How long is that gonna last?

[Gila]

Look, baby, she know you gonna have.

[Baby B]

To talk about All Star Weekend or something.

[Sheila Marie]

Something else. He was you, right?

[Baby B]

He won the dunk contest.

[Gila]

Okay.

[Sheila Marie]

She'll be like, are y' all being weird? Dad, stop.

[Guest or Listener]

You might have to switch the sport.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah.

[Baby B]

Contest.

[Gila]

Okay, back to the three.

[Baby B]

Dunking in that.

[Gila]

Okay, let's go back to three.

[Baby B]

Okay, here we go. Here we go.

[Gila]

Now, this is what. This was not the day. This is what I want to know. Okay, so let's talk about the first time that it happened.

[Baby B]

Oh, wait. Did it happen?

[Gila]

And the thoughts that came to mind when someone approached you or you realized it was part of the energy.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, she was not subtle about it at all. It's actually. I met. I met her. I met her doing work now.

[Gila]

Okay, so she famous, too?

[Sheila Marie]

No, no, no.

[Gila]

There.

[Sheila Marie]

There are. Yes. We're just gonna keep it at. Not. She not famous.

[Baby B]

There we go.

[Sheila Marie]

This one. But, you know, like, women who have approached me about that are not shy about it at all. And, like, because I. They have. They approach me with so much reverence and respect. And so there is no, like, subtle. It's very much like. So I'm a doula. I. I'm a fertility doula, and I work with women. I also like to get in your womb, if that's a thing you'd like.

[Gila]

What?

[Sheila Marie]

You know, totally fine. If it's consent, it's consensual. I can speak with your husband. We could have a meeting.

[Baby B]

I said, she want to get in your room.

[Gila]

Let me look at a picture of y' all again.

[Baby B]

She said she want to get in your room.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes.

[Guest or Listener]

Yes.

[Baby B]

And that didn't work.

[Sheila Marie]

No, because I have. I. I really like women. I think there's a lot of healing with sensuality and sexuality with women and safety. But I don't. Some things, to me, should be kept the fantasy.

[Gila]

You guys look like a. Like, look at this.

[Guest or Listener]

This.

[Gila]

I. I don't know if we could.

[Sheila Marie]

We. We're gonna have to make a hate that.

[Gila]

Y' all look like a couple. That's at hedonism.

[Sheila Marie]

I retreat at heo.

[Baby B]

Listen, and I'm tell you why I'm gonna bring.

[Gila]

First off, you have the body, you got the oils. He look all glisteny.

[Baby B]

He got the little.

[Gila]

He jacked too. And he look like y' all be going over like, okay, baby. Are you kidding? I'm kidding, right? Y' all look like y' all start with a massage.

[Guest or Listener]

Super bowl. Super Bowl, 45, 15.

[Gila]

Oh, look at the hino photo right now. They about to get on the boat, did a little heato trip.

[Baby B]

I know they was asking to eat your pussy. Suck his ass.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah, I just.

[Baby B]

Okay, so I do want to ask you. So during essence, we interviewed Candy Burris. Don't know how we got there. So we're talking about the book, and I'm talking about the couple that I joined in Mexico, where I became a unicorn. And it's funny because Candy openly talks about sex. We see she has bedroom candy. All the things. Bitch. Kandi's mouth was to the floor. And I said, girl, I know me telling you I was with this couple in Mexico ain't like crazy to you. And she was like, no. But in the moment, I'm thinking about what it would be like to be the couple, to be approached by someone singular and what that's like, because I'm the couple. Like, I wouldn't be the single person. So then I want to ask you, is there a way that has worked when a woman has shot their shot at you, respecting that you're in a couple, but wanting to join the two of you? And clearly what you just said is a. I would say, disrespectful way. I'm not gonna hold you. Can I get in your womb? We wouldn't want a man to say that to us. And so I think women. Women blur the lines.

[Sheila Marie]

Well, it was delivered in a respectful way.

[Baby B]

Ooh. Because she said it nicely.

[Gila]

You know what it was, cuz she was probably attractive. Whenever we think someone's cute, we'd be.

[Baby B]

Like, we give them a pass. But, bro, if a man came up to you and was like, you know, I'm a doctor, I deliver babies, and I'd like to get in your womb.

[Sheila Marie]

You're kind of right.

[Baby B]

We wouldn't like that approach from a man.

[Gila]

It's the worst.

[Baby B]

So, like, women have to, I kind of think, be a little bit more slick with it.

[Gila]

Like.

[Baby B]

So for my couple, I bought them both shots and said that they both were attractive and just started talking to both of them. How would you want to be approached as someone who's married for a third. To join you. Because we get that question a lot on this part, too.

[Sheila Marie]

I don't want to be approached, period. Yeah.

[Baby B]

Okay. I won't slide in the dm.

[Sheila Marie]

I just feel. This is. This is. This is a one. My main reason why is because I have so much love and respect for women. There's just a part of me who I just like. If I'm. If I'm gonna engage in it, I don't want to be, like, having feelings with you. I don't want to consider. Like, this is true. This is not like, a very good thing to say, but it's true.

[Baby B]

I don't want to consider.

[Sheila Marie]

I don't want to consider you. Like, I don't want. Like, this is about me. Like, you're not really a full person. You would just be a prop to our, like, sexual adventures, and I'm not okay with it.

[Baby B]

Oh, well, I've admitted that. And I. That's how I navigate.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes. Yeah. So I. I can't. And plus, I. I'm just good. Like, keep in mind, though, a lot.

[Gila]

Of women do want to be that. Like, yeah.

[Baby B]

Not everyone.

[Gila]

Is that when you spoke of prop?

[Sheila Marie]

But it wouldn't feel good for me to do. I don't have any. Oh, no, no.

[Gila]

I know what you're saying. Because it's, like, Then it. It's actually difficult for me when women want to sub out with me and my man. Sub out?

[Sheila Marie]

Sub out.

[Gila]

Sorry.

[Sheila Marie]

That's okay.

[Gila]

Sorry.

[Sheila Marie]

I just want to.

[Gila]

Let me just, like, get into horn talk.

[Guest or Listener]

That's for you. Players being replaced with another player.

[Baby B]

Like, see, you gotta know football. You gotta know sport. Rhetoric, girl. Yeah.

[Gila]

That was cute.

[Sheila Marie]

Got it. That was good.

[Gila]

So, like, yeah, sometimes the serving is a little too much when I know maybe I'll be done with it after and all. And although it's something that's, like, a total kink for them, I don't really.

[Baby B]

Know what to do.

[Gila]

I can accept it for myself, but sometimes it's a little too much for me. Like, there was a really sexy time Mandy talked about with a friend of hers that was subbing for her and her man. And listening to it, I'm like, oh, this is hot. But then in my brain, I'm like, I know I can't do it.

[Baby B]

Oh, yeah. I made that girl sleep on the floor.

[Gila]

Yep.

[Sheila Marie]

What?

[Gila]

Andy, you are savage.

[Baby B]

I had a queen bed, bro. It was hot.

[Gila]

Get on the floor.

[Sheila Marie]

See, I couldn't do that. I would feel so Bad.

[Gila]

I would get on the floor.

[Baby B]

She was fine with it. So it was like, for. For how we had engaged that night.

[Gila]

I will tell you that the queen bed at my LA crib, there's a queen bed. And we had a threesome with this girl. And for y' all that are listening, it's the thick girl. And I was like, damn, we really can't fit in this.

[Baby B]

Oh, I'm not gonna lie. Now that I have a king bed. Someone, by the way, shout out to. I think it was dread on Patreon. He said, so all those stories of threesomes in your house was on a queen bed, bitch. Like, I embarrassed. I don't even know how we fit, bro. My ex was 6, 7, and I'm a thick bitch family yet, so I.

[Gila]

Don'T want a king. But basically what happened was she was in the bed, and while they were sleeping, I went on the couch. So my nigga wakes up, he's like, are you upset? And I was like, no, I'm not upset. I'm really tired. After I had to film textiles the next day.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay. Having a three, so. And you got to get up to work in the morning. It's great.

[Gila]

He's like, do you want to get back into that? I'm like, baby, no. But I feel like we're going to fight about this tomorrow.

[Baby B]

And I'm like, I just want to.

[Gila]

Be on the couch. God, I really wasn't bad. But just like, dog. And then, you know, you sleep and then they want to again. And I'm like, yo, they're so horny. Like, my sexual appetite. I like one really great elaborate session, maybe. In n out. D. I can't do marathon. No sleep six.

[Sheila Marie]

No, I can't either.

[Gila]

Can't do it. Especially imagine with two other people that want to fuck like that, and they just be up ready to bro. At one point, I thought we were just going to play Uno again. And she was like, nope. Strip Uno.

[Baby B]

Oh, yeah. I just be like, y' all go have fun. I'm done. When I'm done, I'm done.

[Sheila Marie]

Threesomes more than just like two partner.

[Baby B]

I don't.

[Sheila Marie]

You don't?

[Baby B]

No.

[Gila]

Yeah.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay.

[Baby B]

It just becomes a lot. And I don't feel like because a man has to please both of us, I feel like I be left not fully.

[Sheila Marie]

You see what I'm saying, right?

[Baby B]

Unless he's somebody that could go along. Like one of my boyfriends right now, he'll make me squirt while he another sit on the face. He Is like, he's not. He's not normal.

[Sheila Marie]

Wow. Congratulations.

[Baby B]

He's an alien and I love it. Yeah, I've been wanting an alien and I got one. One of my is an alien and I'm here for it.

[Gila]

But see the. The pin of great sex to me. And I don't know if everyone has like a type of sex they enjoy. Like, I feel like sometimes super kinky is like one of my favorites or vacation sex or whatever.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, I love vacation.

[Gila]

But that at home, super in love. And that's why I actually like more than the pick me. I'd be ready to get over the casual sex because I need it deeper than that, bro. I need like the casual sex time is too. Oh, yeah, for sure.

[Sheila Marie]

Definitely.

[Gila]

Yeah, go ahead and pick me. Shit.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, okay. So back to me being a pick me. What I was gonna say is I feel like we all might have had a situation where you're dating an aspiring rapper, so we didn't get to marry him.

[Baby B]

Yeah, right.

[Sheila Marie]

This is another. Another situation when I was in college and like, just how I knew I was a pick me was like, he would be in the air quote studio all the time, working hard, and I would be like, I'll make you dinner. You know, like using my. Somebody, you know, we was all trading food stamps and stuff like that. So I would go spend my money, go get the food. Bring it. And he's like, oh, I'm not gonna be home till 4am oh, I'll pack it for you. And like all stuff like that. Like, girl, I'm supposed to be focusing on my grades right now. And like, I just felt like, wait.

[Gila]

Is that pick me?

[Baby B]

I mean, putting men and time and things into a person before yourself, I think that's very pretty.

[Sheila Marie]

He wouldn't do the same for me. Like, it wasn't.

[Baby B]

It wasn't reciprocated.

[Sheila Marie]

No. And then I was also pick me because I was in denial about this one guy and he definitely had a girlfriend at another school. And I was just in big denial about it and trying to win him over. I felt like I knew I was a pick me because I was too focused on getting picked. Oh. It wasn't like, is this person good for me? How do they treat me? What am I getting out of this situation? It was like, how can I prove to this man that I'm worth worthy of being a chosen?

[Gila]

Oh, my gosh, that's. There's something I bring up on decision decisions is horrible a lot because it's so vivid in my mind. It's a conversation and if you've never heard it, great. Sorry if I'm telling it again, but it just always goes back to this. My man said to me on a few dates in when we met, he's like, I date women that are so obsessed with me. They love how I look. They love that I'm independent. They like my test, they like my look. They like that I'm a nigga that ain't skimming or, or, or hotel or this or that, that I'm doing well, but I look like this. They have this idea in their mind for the man they want. He's like, but at the end of the day, they're just falling in love with this idea of me. They just want me to want them so bad. They don't even know me. He's like, I be saying shit these bitches don't even like. And they just be like, whatever, right? I could be anti feminist, I don't care. And they just want me so bad. And I really believe this comes from few things. One, your first fine nigga. Two, your first nigga with money. And three, now I've fallen victim to this. Your first really good dick. Oh, all of the above. My first great dick was a poor dick. That dick was dusty.

[Baby B]

It had roommates.

[Gila]

That dick had shit on the floor. The TV wasn't a tv, it was a laptop. And I was sitting right there like, okay, well I love the office so much. I've seen that episode so many times. I don't care. A good dick is a prison and you hold the key.

[Sheila Marie]

It can be, it can be, it.

[Baby B]

Can be, it can be, it can be.

[Sheila Marie]

To me, it depends.

[Baby B]

I, I, I'm God's chosen. I done had fine rich and good dick my whole life. I'm not gonna hold you.

[Gila]

I got dick so good that I'm like, hey, take my credit. Let's put a car in your head.

[Baby B]

Oh, I've never.

[Gila]

Let's get you out of here.

[Baby B]

So maybe I haven't had dick. Never had dick that's made me want.

[Gila]

To know who I think. Stephan D. Jesus.

[Annabe Sofas Ad]

Tired of spills and stains on your sofa? Wash away your worries with Anabe. Annabe is the only machine washable sofa inside and out where designer quality meets budget friendly prices.

[Baby B]

That's right.

[Annabe Sofas Ad]

Sofas start at just $699. Enjoy a no risk experience with pet friendly stain resistant and changeable slipcovers made with performance fabric. Experience cloud like comfort with high resilience foam. That's hypoallergenic and never needs fluffing. The sturdy steel frame ensures longevity and the modular pieces can be rearranged anytime. Shop washablesofas.com for early Black Friday savings up to 60% off site wide, backed by a 30 day satisfaction guarantee. If you're not absolutely in love, send it back for a full refund. No return, shipping or restocking fees. Every penny back. Upgrade [e-mail] Offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

[Better Picks Ad]

Want to score when your favorite player does well? You can't unless you download Better Picks. Who's giving away a free $10 download the better app, Pick more or less on your favorite player's stats, watch the games, some cash. It's that simple. Must be 21 or older in a jurisdiction where Better Picks operates terms and conditions Black Better Picks Sports just got.

[Baby B]

Better well, I want to go back to this is kind of reactionary, but the full crutch of the episode in terms of Pick me's we talked about insecurity and self worth early on. I want to play a clip for us to talk about, okay? And I would love for the men to really tune in here. Aking we might need your input as the only peen on the mic, but I'm gonna play this clip of someone responding to a recent one of the recent interviews because she's done it the last couple years, but recently Aisha Curry sat on a podcast and talked about how Steph Curry wasn't even her type when they first met, et cetera, et cetera.

[Sheila Marie]

But this is what I didn't hear all that.

[Baby B]

Oh yeah, she's also said in the past that she wishes people would look at her and desire her.

[Sheila Marie]

I do remember that.

[Baby B]

Yes, there's also been the recent conversation around Michelle Obama, who said the same thing about our president because he's always going to be President Obama around her. Not, you know, even them liking each other for a portion of their 10 years of their relationship. But I want to play this clip because this is what a man had to say about it.

[Guest or Listener]

I don't know if anybody else noticed this, but Aisha Curry is putting in maximum effort to let the world know that she is struggling with trying not to cheat on her husband and because she can just smell an opportunity to embarrass this man because she gets on every interview telling everybody about just how frustrated she is with his success, how frustrated she is that women desire him, how much she wished it was her being lusted after by people who don't Give a F about her, how desperately she wants to get attention from other men, how locked down she feels with the kids. Every interview she goes on, she unwarrantedly forces us to listen to her vent about her not wanting to be with her husband. She wants to go be Glorilla or something like, we get it, bro. Just go drop an album or something like, stop embarrassing this man, bro.

[Baby B]

Actually continue to drop your pots and pans. Now, I brought this up because I wanted to have the conversation around as a wife, as a woman in relationship, as someone who's maybe even in a long standing relationship, right? What does it look like to have whatever urge or desire a to vocalize the fact that you don't feel either desired by your partner and miss getting attention because sometimes you feel like you want to see if you still got it right. And where does the line get drawn in you expressing that and it being disrespectful to your partner and you shitting on your partner publicly for expressing kind of what you. How you want to feel. And also respond to the clip too.

[Sheila Marie]

First of all, bring back war, okay? Let them go fight and do something in battle. Like, you need a purpose for your life. Because I just feel like, why are you all in women's business? Why are you all commenting on this man?

[Gila]

Wife, girl, that's all the sound.

[Baby B]

Oh, I like the sound.

[Sheila Marie]

The music in the background, right? Steph Curry jumped in the chat and was like, I'm good, I'm good. I don't have no issue, right? I ain't got no issue with that. So why are you more mad than him? It gives you jealous of her? You want to be next to him? I don't know. I just. To me, I feel like, what's really going on? People be lying so much though. People lie all the time. You don't care, okay? You don't care about the sanctity of marriage. What? You don't care? You care so much about Steph that your friends like, you don't care. You just want an opportunity to shame women. People who have internalized misogyny, no matter your gender love shaming women. It doesn't matter if she's dressed, if she's not dressed, if she's married, if she's not married, if she has kids, if she doesn't have kids, if she's sexual, if she's not, it doesn't fucking matter. The whole, it's like you can find whatever tool you want. The whole game is, how do I shame women's choices and There's a certain brand of men who get a certain satisfaction out of bringing down the partners of their favorites. Yeah, like, I'm not gonna lie to.

[Gila]

You, this isn't exactly relative, but it's semi on par with the Crystal thing because that was why people were angry. Just like this dude is doing that shaming a woman's choice kind of fucks you up. If someone is good with their choice, there's only so much we could fight for them. Right?

[Sheila Marie]

That's a good point.

[Gila]

You know what I'm saying? At the end of the day, Cardi clearly looks happy, glowing, Rich, whatever. Now, the thing that we saw with Offset is probably why we're all irritated with Stefan. But Offset was her husband. Offset, and her, clearly, from what she told us, had their arrangement on what he was allowed to do. We have no idea about Stephan. All we know is this girl's cute, rich, fucking another nigga and pregnant. And the problem with, like, the shaming of the choices is we pick and choose when it's okay.

[Baby B]

Yep.

[Gila]

So we either gotta let them have it all the way or don't. This in particular is worse because it's coming from a dude. I think Crystals maybe is a place of, like, I want you to do better.

[Sheila Marie]

Right.

[Gila]

Whereas this nigga is just finding any opportunity to shit.

[Baby B]

Well, then let me ask for the overarching thing then. As a woman who's in a relationship, is it. Are you allowed to. And I want to say aloud, and airplanes.

[Sheila Marie]

People be lying.

[Baby B]

So you. You think it's healthy that women are on mics and on platforms sharing how they feel? Essentially, yeah. About their goddamn relationships. Gee, what a concept.

[Sheila Marie]

Hold on, hold on.

[Baby B]

We have the penis on the mic.

[Guest or Listener]

Remember we said this before on Selective ignorance. These are undiagnosed people.

[Baby B]

Oh, yeah, everybody. Undiagnosed.

[Guest or Listener]

They're in the ecosystem of these microbes.

[Sheila Marie]

What do you mean, undiagnosed?

[Baby B]

We just say everyone's undiagnosed. Like, in something. In terms of.

[Sheila Marie]

Oh, yeah, everybody's got a little something.

[Baby B]

Just a little something. A little tism somewhere. But in terms of. You're right. In terms of this, it is. For what I see on the Internet, the men upset about what Michelle Obama had to say, how Ayesha Curry expresses these things. And it's probably like.

[Sheila Marie]

And almost mad that the man isn't mad about it. Like, seth, why aren't you mad? You should be mad. And he's like, I'm. I'm actually fine with her expressing herself. It's okay. I mean, that happens. To me, you're right. Because, you know, I have a lot of opinions, and I express my opinions, and they'll be like, oh, what does Ace think about this? Because I speak all the time. Weren't. Were you guys just. Or. Or was the other episode I was listening to when you guys were talking about how, like, women who hate men, like, have the best relationships or something like that? Yeah, I do, because I like one of y'.

[Gila]

All.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay. No shade. You know what?

[Gila]

I'm just saying, one day I'm gonna get married and be like, real ass bitch. Give a fuck about it.

[Baby B]

Except you, baby. So let me ask you, is there anything that has taken place in your relationship that you overshared in public that did, like, didn't make your partner feel good because he didn't want that narrative out at all?

[Sheila Marie]

Um, not exactly. I think the closest thing to that would be when we were on Love and hip hop. And, like, I was. I was sharing. Like, I had. I was just. I was naive. I can be very naive. So I was just like, I'm just gonna talk about mental health. I'm gonna talk about my anxiety.

[Gila]

Is that how people know you?

[Sheila Marie]

No, not my audience. No.

[Gila]

Yeah, like, loving hip hop, like, when people are coming up to you. Is it. Is it?

[Sheila Marie]

Not really, Because I only did one season.

[Gila]

Okay.

[Sheila Marie]

There are some people who know me from there, but most people know me from your.

[Baby B]

From my own brand.

[Gila]

Sorry, continue.

[Sheila Marie]

And, yeah, so I was talking about mental health. So it just. The way it was edited, it looked like I was just completely complaining non stop about my marriage. And he didn't have, again, this same symptom. He didn't really have a huge issue with it, but everybody else did. And, like, you know, during that time, he was like, you should divorce her. It was rough. I was like, oh, my God, I did not mean this. And so that was, like, the closest time. But one of my favorite things about Ace is he minds his own business and drinks water. And drinks his water. And he knows who he married. As you said, I thirst trap. I've been doing that since I started Instagram. I've been bikini pictures from 2016. Like, this is how you met me. It's how you engage to me. This is how you marry. Like this, the same person. And while we're here, nobody ever asked Ace, you have your abs out online. Does Sheila know about that?

[Gila]

Don't be having them out.

[Baby B]

Hey, he be shirtless a lot.

[Sheila Marie]

Second, you got hoochie daddies on.

[Guest or Listener]

Hold on.

[Sheila Marie]

And you know what?

[Gila]

Respectfully, we want him to keep it off.

[Baby B]

You're right. Now that I think about it, no, you're right. I don't think we get asked no how our men present.

[Gila]

Wait a minute. I'll tell you, I do got some homegirls that be acting a little crazy and they be like, damn, about what? But I feel it, though. They be like, oh, he's posting this. Or he's like, in the water. Like, one of my homegirls, her man just went on a trip somewhere in Europe. And she's like, he knows what he's doing. And I'm like, yeah, but bitch, we too weren't EVs the last year.

[Baby B]

Oh, I don't even know.

[Sheila Marie]

I don't know.

[Baby B]

I want my man to look good on the ground.

[Sheila Marie]

Agreement in our relationship. Yeah, like, we know. That's what I'm saying. So to me, I think people be lying online. They do online. There's like, online Internet conversations and then there's real life. They don't always intersect. I just think these conversations are online because people in real life, you go out to a restaurant, you're gonna see the wife looking fine at dinner. Who's she dressing up for? It doesn't matter. Like. Like currency. Attention is currency. We are visual creatures. It's a vain ass society we live in. People want to look nice. You want to be looked at. I like sometimes posting my thirst trap. So does he. I don't care. I. He doesn't care.

[Gila]

Is it that I'm curious when it comes to knowing that you feel sexy by posting the bikini pic? You, you, me. Is it bad?

[Sheila Marie]

No, I mean, bad is subjective.

[Gila]

Like, are we really doing something so terrible by, like, getting a bit of an ego boost?

[Sheila Marie]

That's what I'm saying. And we all do it. We all do it in different ways, by the way. That's what I'll be saying.

[Baby B]

I'll be like, am I supposed to wear a turtleneck on a beach hoe? I'm finna be in a bathing suit.

[Sheila Marie]

And you look good, by the way.

[Baby B]

Thank you, friend. So I don't. I don't do, like, I don't post, like, the lingerie panty pictures in the mirror on online because them. And I don't even like taking them, but them is sent to my niggas and they be real picky about getting pictures that ain't online.

[Gila]

Do you send them? Do you send the same ones?

[Baby B]

Oh, I said everyone the same ones. I actually go in the chat and from that picture that I sent to that One. Because sometimes I have a. You know, there's different ones, and I want to make sure I'm sending the best ones. All of them.

[Sheila Marie]

I got the edits.

[Baby B]

I go straight from that picture in the group in the message copy. I go to the arrow. Nope. I go to the arrow. Message to the next. Message to the next. Message to the next.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm so scared I'm gonna make a mistake.

[Baby B]

Oh, they all get the. The same picture.

[Gila]

I got caught doing that, and it was really bad.

[Baby B]

How do you get caught sending everyone the same picture?

[Gila]

Because I wrote it with a message you said you wanted.

[Baby B]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. There's no message.

[Gila]

I say that, but thanks.

[Baby B]

Oh, no, no, no. These get. First off, I know what I'm going to be. Even last night, right? We glammed up. And I let all my know I'm gonna be glammed up. I'm gonna send you pictures. They all couldn't wait. So they all got the glam up.

[Gila]

They all couldn't wait.

[Baby B]

All couldn't wait. Sent them all the little picture. And I got all the hearts at the same time.

[Gila]

Bro, let me tell you, I'm so disgusting with my nudes. I'm gonna tell y' all what I be doing. This to me is just like, very extra, but I be thinking it's cute and pretty, so I literally like. And it's vulgar nudes. I'll take my leg, I'll hold it up, show you what I learned in Pilates, and be like, do you like my new plant? And it'll be right behind me. I don't give a fuck. And then, you know. Cause I feel like the nails is overdone. So then I try to pick other things. What do you think about these new decorative pillows, Booty hole? Like.

[Baby B]

Like that.

[Sheila Marie]

I learned something new every day.

[Gila]

And then one time, my was like, I don't know. I kind of like the one before you.

[Baby B]

Oh, that's why they don't really get news. My new thing is when I'm getting dressed, I. I have my titty in between all my fingers, and that's all they get.

[Gila]

Here you go.

[Baby B]

You're getting a little nipple today. That's it.

[Sheila Marie]

Really?

[Baby B]

Girl, If I show you the news I send, it's not really news.

[Gila]

Not a lazy nipple. Oh, I. I'm crying.

[Baby B]

You know why I don't send all that? I send lazy nudes, and then I send porn. If you wanna see a bitch busting it wide open, here's some porn.

[Sheila Marie]

Here you Go.

[Baby B]

Here's some porn for you.

[Sheila Marie]

Here you go, honey.

[Baby B]

Here's some porn for you. Okay. Before we get out of here, I wanna dive deep a little bit because your book Unruly is a guide for black women to uncover your truest story and step into your personal power through radical self, love, self acceptance and joy. G. Not what I was saying in the top of the episode. And so how do you. How. How is the guy broken down into this? We've talked about no holds barred being more of a memoir and holding up the mirror to ourselves and guiding people along the way through sexuality, heartbreak, relationship, those things. But what things in terms of radical self love, self acceptance? What steps do you give in Unruly?

[Sheila Marie]

So the book is inspired from my retreats. So my retreats are the unruly retreat, which. The first one we ever did was at Heedo and I didn't know it.

[Baby B]

Oh, you. Wait, you didn't know what hedonism was?

[Sheila Marie]

No, I was again, remember that when I like the Internet.

[Baby B]

Wait a second, wait a minute. You didn't look it up. I need this story.

[Sheila Marie]

Actually, I.

[Baby B]

Please.

[Sheila Marie]

Well, the. The site though, if you look up. So I just went on the way. If you go on he knows website, they don't explicitly.

[Baby B]

It says wicked for a week.

[Sheila Marie]

It says. It doesn't say swinging. I thought it was clothing optional. And I was like, oh, okay, okay, okay, that's.

[Gila]

So you knew his name.

[Sheila Marie]

Okay, you knew clothing optional. I was like, this would be so freeing for us. Like, we could go there and find acceptance of our bodies and La la. It was. It was great. They also got into some other stuff. But hey, I get treated like the mom, so I don't get to know anything. So. But I just heard people had a great time, but I didn't know it was. I didn't know swinging element. I. I thought it was just clothing optional. So. But anyway, it was great. We. Honestly, that was one of my favorite retreats I've ever done, actually, because we did.

[Baby B]

I'm sure. I'm sure everyone was liberated after that.

[Sheila Marie]

Literally. Literally. Because, like, we were so sad the last day to have to put clothes back on.

[Gila]

We were like, oh, my God, that's hilarious.

[Sheila Marie]

Because it's so. It's so freeing. Like, you don't have to worry about what do you have on. And this person. And they were all like, oh, my God, is that your C section scar? I love that. Wow, you have your clip here. Wow, that's so cool. You have your name, like, it was just so the word freeing. So anyway, yes, I've been doing my. My retreats for Black women since 2018. And that's actually where a lot of people remember me from for love and hip hop is. There was one scene where I was talking about my retreats and I was just saying there's a space for black women. I'm sorry, if you don't identify as black, you cannot attend this. There are so many places for everyone else. Everyone else. And this is a space for black women. End of story. Sorry.

[Baby B]

So could Cardi B come?

[Sheila Marie]

No. Well, you know what if I asked her, do you identify as a black woman? And she said yes, that's all.

[Baby B]

That's okay.

[Sheila Marie]

That's her identity. I'm not gonna go back and forth about it.

[Gila]

Got you.

[Sheila Marie]

I've never had an issue with it.

[Baby B]

So that's you.

[Sheila Marie]

You identify as black. Do you feel like you share the lived experience of a black woman? Then?

[Baby B]

All right, please come and join us.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah. Because arguing about race is just a big distraction.

[Baby B]

I love that. When is your next retreat?

[Sheila Marie]

We're going to Ghana. So I'm doing Ghana for Dirty December.

[Baby B]

I love that. No, I'm doing Ghana in April.

[Sheila Marie]

I cannot wait. Have you been there before?

[Baby B]

I've been to Ghana. I love Ghana and the food. Ghana is my favorite part. So I've been to Ghana, Nigeria and South Africa. South Africa is beautiful, but too many whites for me. Wasn't giving motherland, but Ghana. Oh my God. And everyone's so. They're so nice there. Oh my God. I had a great time. Just be ready to. Not sure how your knees work or your hips or anything. Party till 10am I told them, I.

[Sheila Marie]

Said, I'm not doing this thing at.

[Baby B]

9Am the sun is up and they're still going.

[Sheila Marie]

Start at 4.

[Gila]

I will tell you, starting at 4am is crazy. It's a good techno party, a good, like deep house. I remember saying to one of my homeboys in Johannesburg, like, is it crazy in New York we have to do drugs to be at the 10am party. That's what Africa they don't.

[Baby B]

You can wake up at six, like have your coffee and go to the club. And they're still partying from the night before.

[Gila]

Because it's like, like it's culturally just.

[Baby B]

They party. I wasn't ready, bro.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Baby B]

I went to like four places in one night. And normally I do that, but within like a four hour time frame. No, girl, it was like a shift, a work shift, a 12 hour one. Like I was a nurse.

[Sheila Marie]

You liked it?

[Baby B]

On my feet the whole time. Yeah, but then I got tired.

[Sheila Marie]

Yeah, I was gonna say.

[Baby B]

And then it's like you're trying to get another wind because no one else wants to go.

[Gila]

I don't know if you'll see the daylight at some point. Like, you sleep there.

[Baby B]

It's great.

[Gila]

You just sleep all day to get ready to go out again.

[Baby B]

And then you eat. It's the best food.

[Gila]

It's the best food.

[Baby B]

Well, I'm ready.

[Sheila Marie]

I'm ready to party. I'm ready. I'm definitely ready for a little party.

[Gila]

On your retreat that they can come and join.

[Sheila Marie]

Well, yes, you can still join for Ghana. We're leaving in December, so it's kind of coming up pretty soon.

[Gila]

But our bitches got money. The fuck you saying?

[Baby B]

What's the next one o?

[Sheila Marie]

I love.

[Baby B]

What's the one in 2026.

[Sheila Marie]

Yes. Cancel the money scarcity period. Yes. So, and then in 2026, in March, I'm going to Thailand, which I do have spots open for it.

[Gila]

Oh, have you been to Thailand?

[Sheila Marie]

I did. Didn't I say that, too?

[Baby B]

I love. We talked about Thailand. You just. You just came back from Thailand.

[Sheila Marie]

I did.

[Baby B]

The last time I wanted to have her on the pod, she was like, oh, girl, I'm going to Thailand. I said, excuse me. All right, never mind. Next time we.

[Gila]

That's actually a place I feel like, repeat, repeat, repeat.

[Baby B]

I've been there five times. I love it, I love it.

[Sheila Marie]

We're going back with the group. We got five spots left, so go ahead.

[Baby B]

What's the website? Drop the website. Drop the. The.

[Sheila Marie]

The best way to find me is on Instagram at the Sheila Marie, and everything is linked there. If you're interested in coming to Thailand, if you want to order my book, if you want to just follow up with what I'm doing. I'm chaotic. Who knows? And yeah, you can find me there.

[Baby B]

And don't slide in her DMS asking for a threesome, y'. All. She said no. She said, don't do it. Actually. Don't do it.

[Sheila Marie]

No, I'm good.

[Baby B]

By the way, if you haven't yet, make sure you purchase our book, no Holds Barred, A dual manifesto of sexual exploration and power. It is available wherever you get books and what we like to do. If you've already read it, we have gotten. I've gotten so many DMS stories. If you like the book, it would do serve us justice. If you go on over to Amazon and leave a five star review, please and thank you. Also, we got a little horrible here with a little bit of the sex talk talk. If you want more raunch. More sex. We didn't go anywhere. Horrible decisions still exist. Just $5 a month, the bare minimum, over on Patreon. So go to patreon.com backslash Horrible Decisions, where you could still get all of the sex talk. And of course, join us every Wednesday. You got decisions right here. This has been another episode of Decisions, Decisions.

[Gila]

Bye.

[Better Picks Ad]

Do you actually know Ball? Well, come prove it with a free $10 from Better Picks. Download the Better app, pick more or less on player stats, watch the games, and win cash. It's that simple. Must be 21 or older. In a jurisdiction where Better Picks operates, terms and conditions apply. Better Picks. Sports just got better.

[Sheila Marie]

This is an iHeart podcast.