EP 455: The Truth About Egg Freezing (feat. Zuri Hall)

Summary

Podcast Summary: Decisions, Decisions - EP 455: The Truth About Egg Freezing (feat. Zuri Hall)

Hosts: Mandii B and WeezyWTF
Guest: Zuri Hall (Emmy Award-winning TV personality)
Date: January 12, 2026
Theme: An open, candid conversation about egg freezing—personal journeys, the stigma, the cost, the emotional realities, and why women choose to preserve their fertility.

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Episode Overview

This episode features Mandii B and WeezyWTF delving into the nuances of egg freezing with guest Zuri Hall. The trio candidly explores the medical, emotional, cultural, and financial aspects of fertility preservation for women in their 30s. Zuri shares her firsthand experience with egg freezing, providing invaluable insight and breaking down stigmas associated with proactive reproductive planning. The conversation is infused with the show’s signature humor and authenticity, with relatable anecdotes and real talk about love, partnership, and self-determination.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why Egg Freezing is on the Table

• Egg Freezing on Social Timelines ([02:38]–[05:45])
  • Zuri is one of several public figures sparking more openness about egg freezing; Mandii and Weezy reference watching friends and celebrities like Cami Crawford discuss their own experiences.
  • Mandii details friends' experiences with IVF due to cancer and diminished ovarian syndrome, explaining the unpredictable and often costly path even for younger women.
    • "They want to be able to get 10 eggs out of you...she’s gone through two rounds and only has three eggs...it’s cost her over $7,000 each time for this process with insurance." – Mandy B ([04:38])
  • Peer support is highlighted, mentioning Facebook groups where women share leftover medications.

2. The Taboo & Timing of Fertility Discussions

• Why Isn’t This Talked About Earlier? ([05:45]–[06:43])
  • Zuri reflects on why conversations about fertility are so delayed and how society’s message of “you have time, focus on your career” can leave women unprepared for biological realities.
    • "Why was nobody talking about this when we were younger and could have been seriously considering our options?" – Zuri Hall ([05:45])
  • She discusses nearly freezing her eggs in her late 20s when she still had employer-provided insurance but was overwhelmed by the process and didn't do it—one of few life decisions she would revisit.

3. Motivation, Relationship Status, & Societal Perception

• Freezing Eggs with or without a Partner ([08:03]–[09:00]; [24:03]–[28:12])
  • Exploring the misconception that egg freezing only makes sense for single women or must indicate pessimism about love.
    • "Why is it so binary? Why if I'm interested in this, am I afraid of dying alone and that's my only option?" – Zuri Hall ([24:37])
    • Zuri says her decision wasn’t out of fear, but empowerment and wanting options.

4. The Step-by-Step Process of Egg Freezing

• Medical and Logistical Realities ([26:55]–[34:41])
  • Zuri outlines the four rounds of egg freezing she underwent, detailing the injections, medical appointments (every other day during cycles), and need for strict timing—sometimes injecting herself before/after red carpets or galas.
    • "You have to inject from my car because the red carpet wrapped at a certain time…did not matter. Those needles were everywhere with me." – Zuri Hall ([29:13])
  • The retrieval process isn’t as simple as it sounds—many eggs are not viable.
    • "I used to think…however many eggs y'all see on the ultrasound, let's go...but that's not the case." – Zuri Hall ([30:58])
  • Post-retrieval, sexual activity is restricted due to discomfort and medical advisement.

5. The Financial Burden

• Costs and Resources ([40:12]–[41:23])
  • Each cycle costs ~$7,000–$8,000 (exclusive of medication, which can cost another $3,000–$4,000 each round).
  • Long-term storage fees ($900+/year) add up—some women keep eggs stored for years with uncertain use.
  • Insurance coverage is spotty; some benefits exist for certain employers, but not for freelance/self-employed women.
  • Advice to seek out Facebook groups for tips, medication sharing, and even grants:
    • "You could actually get an egg freezing grant...Google this online." – Weezy ([41:23])

6. Cultural Taboo and Shifting Stigma

• Women Second-Guessing Each Other ([33:27]–[35:43])
  • Zuri describes being questioned (even by women) about whether she truly needed egg freezing, and how stats show most women don’t end up using their frozen eggs but overwhelmingly don’t regret the decision for the peace of mind it brings.
    • "Most women who freeze their eggs do not end up...using them. They end up getting pregnant naturally or not going on a pregnancy journey. And yet overwhelmingly...they still did not regret the choice." – Zuri Hall ([34:41])
• The Power of Normalizing the Conversation ([52:17]–[54:16])
  • Encouragement for women to talk more openly—Zuri notes how many friends only confided in her after she spoke publicly.
  • "I promise I won’t promise—I’ll speak for myself—I would rather know what I am working with...so that I can make a conscious and informed decision than just keep putting it off because I'm afraid of the answer." – Zuri Hall ([53:30])

7. Love, Partnership, and Empowerment

• Empowerment Isn’t Anti-Love ([43:14]–[44:29])
  • Zuri wants partnership and marriage as much as empowerment, rejecting the idea that wanting a partner is incompatible with feminist or empowered identities.
    • "That is the duality of life, of being a woman—two things can be true at once...I want the partner, I want the husband...I want to create a family unit." – Zuri Hall ([43:14])
    • "I can be an empowered, powerful woman and still want the traditional looks of a relationship or want a man by my side." – Mandy B ([44:29])

8. Timing, Surrogacy, and the Pressure of Biology

• Geriatric Pregnancy and Setting Deadlines ([44:58]–[45:31])
  • Discussing “geriatric pregnancy” (designation for women 34+), the pressure of timelines, and openness to surrogacy if necessary.
    • "I would like to experience the journey of pregnancy for myself, but I am not so attached to the idea of that that I would be devastated if I needed surrogacy." – Zuri Hall ([45:16])

9. Support Systems

• Tribe, Family & Friends ([49:47]–[51:13])
  • Zuri credits her close relationship with her mother and best friends as essential to her journey, emphasizing the importance of not doing it alone.
    • "My mom has been an incredible sort of side by side person...sometimes sit with me on FaceTime when I was doing injections just so that I didn’t have to feel alone." – Zuri Hall ([50:17])

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Notable Quotes

• On the Reality of Timing:
  "We're always told, you've got so much time, don't worry about it. But there is also the biological truth of what our bodies are going to do."
  — Zuri Hall ([05:45])

• On Emotional Toll & Empowerment:
  "I felt like I was giving myself a gift that I had the privilege of being able to afford...it is expensive, right?"
  — Zuri Hall ([40:03])

• On the Difficult Emotional Moments:
  "There were moments where I was angry…I didn’t even know what you were angry at...at how unfair it can be for women to have to be the ones to carry this labor."
  — Zuri Hall ([39:11])

• On Normalizing Conversations Among Women:
  "Once I came out publicly, [friends] were texting me, like, 'Oh my god, girl, I did it five years ago.' How you ain't say nothing then?"
  — Zuri Hall ([52:17])

• On Wanting Partnership:
  "You can be an empowered woman and want a partner or a man right next to you too...Two things can be true. Bitch. I'm empowered and I still want a man."
  — Mandy B & Zuri Hall ([43:53]–[44:29])

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Fun & Lighthearted Segments

Games & Icebreakers

• Poetry-Style Song Guessing Game ([08:45]–[10:44])
• Three Things in the Overnight Bag ([19:06]–[21:54])
• Love Languages & Ideal Dates ([15:05]–[18:29])
• Surrogacy, Baby Mamas, and Movie References
  — Entertaining discussion about the logistics, stress, and humor in choosing a surrogate ([47:26]–[48:46]).

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Resources, Advice & Final Takeaways

• Grants and Financial Workarounds:
  Look up egg freezing grants, insurance plans, and online groups for support and medication sharing.
• Medical Advocacy:
  Zuri highlights the importance of both Western and Eastern medicine (including supplements and acupuncture) and advocates for holistic care ([56:24]).
• Breaking the Silence:
  The episode underscores the urgent need for more open conversations about fertility and reproductive health, especially among Black women.

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Useful Timestamps

• [03:14] – Mandii’s friends’ medical experiences with egg freezing
• [05:45] – Zuri reflects on lack of early fertility education
• [24:37] – The binary stigma: fear and empowerment
• [26:55] – What actually happens in an egg freezing round
• [34:41] – Cultural questioning around egg freezing; regret vs. peace of mind
• [40:12] – Breaking down the detailed costs
• [49:47] – Zuri on support systems and family
• [52:17] – The importance of lifting the silence
• [56:24] – Zuri’s highlight: resource plug and her new show

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Resources & Further Information

• Instagram: @zurihall — for Q&As and detailed egg freezing highlights
• Zuri’s New Show: “Not About Sports” – Interview series with sports personalities on YouTube
• Recommended Clinic: OVA Egg Freezing, Chicago
• Egg Freezing Grants: Search online for up-to-date opportunities
• Storage/Financial Planning: Be prepared for recurring storage fees and variable medical costs

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Tone & Language

The conversation is deeply personal, empowering, and often hilarious—true to the candid and unfiltered energy of the Decisions, Decisions podcast. The hosts and guest maintain an inclusive and supportive tone, with open discussion of taboos and normalization of women’s complex reproductive choices.

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Bottom line:
Whether you’re considering egg freezing, supporting someone who is, or just curious, this episode arms listeners with honest insight, emotional solidarity, and inspiration to pursue informed choices—always emphasizing that your body, your future, your call.

Transcript

[Zuri Hall]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Did you know Tide has been upgraded to provide an even better clean in cold water? Tide is specifically designed to fight any stain you throw at it. Even in cold butter. Yep. Chocolate ice cream. Sure thing. Barbecue sauce. Tide's got you covered. You don't need to use warm water. Additionally, Tide pods let you confidently fight tough stains with new coldzyme technology. Just remember, if it's gotta be clean, it's gotta be tied.

[Mandy B]

Hey, Sal. Hank. What's going on? We haven't worked a case in years. I just bought my car at Carvana, and it was so easy. Too easy.

[Weezy]

Think something's up?

[Mandy B]

You tell me. They got thousands of options, found a great car at a great price, and it got delivered the next day. It sounds like Carvana just makes it easy to buy your car, Hank. Yeah, you're right. Case closed.

[Weezy]

Buy your car today on Carvana. Delivery fees may apply. Welcome to Decisions, Decisions.

[Mandy B]

I don't think you should say decisions, decisions. It sounded like you was talking. It cursed him.

[Weezy]

You definitely say the welcome.

[Mandy B]

Welcome to the new podcast car.

[Weezy]

Oh, wait, you want to say it together?

[Mandy B]

Decisions, decisions.

[Weezy]

Hey, guys.

[Mandy B]

Welcome to another episode of this is the Host. This is the Host. Listen, my vocals ain't really hitting, but I'll never be a superstar singer, but I am Mandy B, AKA Peg Thee Stallion, AKA that's Beach.

[Weezy]

Hey, y', all, I'm Weezy. Welcome back to another episode of our show. We have a guest today and her bio is so long that I'm gonna have to pick my favorite things to say. Ms. Zuri Hall. She's an Emmy Award winning TV personality who would be known from what I know, e. Red carpets, NBC's Access Hollywood, bringing the energy and empathy that she's best known for as a child who emailed this girl. They don't see it too.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Weezy]

Oh, you're from Ohio. Anyway.

[Zuri Hall]

I am Toledo.

[Weezy]

She's also a global ambassador for the Global Fund of Children. Oh, we only talk about the ones that we swallowed.

[Mandy B]

And yeah, I was gonna say it's F them kids all day over here. No, we love the kids.

[Weezy]

This is the kids episode.

[Mandy B]

We love the kids.

[Weezy]

But Zuri hall is a seasoned host. She's known from covering anything from Vanity Fair to Vogue as a style star. So I want you guys to give it up for Zuri Hall. Hi. Hi.

[Zuri Hall]

Hi.

[Weezy]

Hi. Hi. Hi.

[Zuri Hall]

Thank you. Thank you for that. I also apologize that you were subjected to having to edit that in real time, but hello. So glad to be here.

[Weezy]

I will tell you this like we've been talking about having Zuri. I feel like we all have messaged each other at some point. Hey, come on, come on. But the reason this episode happened is the egg freezing journey. You're the second person on my timeline. We've been seeing Kami Crawford talk about everything from her experience to money. And it was just like, okay, let's do this. And I know that women listening, you may want to have kids, may not want to have kids, may not even give a shit or say fuck them kids too. But I think just even knowing about it, because all of our friends that are at this age maybe have tossed the idea. And I don't really know how to get in conversation about egg freezing as much.

[Mandy B]

I've had three friends do it. So two of them went through egg freezing for. They were diagnosed with breast cancer. So having to have their eggs frozen before going through chemo. And then another friend of mine currently has gone through, I think two rounds total, still hasn't gotten everything but two rounds of IVF for diminishing ovarian syndrome, which this is my first time hearing about it and I've talked about it. Cause it's a lot. She's younger than me, so early 30s and literally trying to save it for later and realize what is it? So diminishing ovarian syndrome, basically, even when you have IVF, they want to be able to get 10 eggs out of you during this process. Now the IVF is to make you get more eggs and make them. They have to be a certain size for them to even retrieve them, for them to be able to be cons. Healthy for them to be able to be frozen. Mind you, they can insert this egg later and it still doesn't mean it's going to be a full egg. So basically her going through this, her egg count is just drastically low. She has no reason why, like. And it's just something that's rare. They can't really explain it. So in her early 30s, she's not producing eggs like she should. So she's gone through two rounds and only has three eggs.

[Weezy]

Wow, three.

[Mandy B]

And mind you, with insurance, it doesn't really matter. It's cost her over $7,000 each time for this process with insurance.

[Zuri Hall]

Did her insurance cover some of it?

[Mandy B]

Some of it. But also the medication that she's had to take. And because she has not as many eggs, she has to keep doing it. But one of the things I do want to share before we get into this, because it's one of the most Amazing things. The Facebook groups. So she was spending so much money on the medication. There's women that, during their IVF journeys, end up mysteriously getting pregnant, like, from there, naturally. Naturally.

[Weezy]

I hear that's.

[Mandy B]

And so what's dope is if you're in whatever city you are, there's normally groups of women that are doing IVF and they'll, hey, guys, I got my magical baby. If y'. All, if you need any medication, I have it.

[Zuri Hall]

Wow.

[Mandy B]

And so there's women that, like, share their medications. But yeah, I think being. Being 35 and having so many friends go through fertility journeys in the way that they have, especially through egg freezing has been really interesting to, like, learn firsthand.

[Zuri Hall]

It's fascinating. And it feels like everyone just popped up all at once talking about yes. Which is awesome. But also points to what kind of threw me for a loop of why was nobody talking about this when we were younger and could have been seriously considering our options. Right. We're always told, you've got so much time, don't worry about it. Don't think of, like, girl. Focus on your career. Do your thing. That is true. But there is also the biological truth of what our bodies are going to do. And so when I was in my 20s, you always think the guy's going to be the guy. And it's like, oh, there's going to.

[Weezy]

Be the guy, girls. I look at him, I'd be like, that's our wedding.

[Zuri Hall]

And it's going to be going to.

[Weezy]

Wear that same shirt.

[Zuri Hall]

My king. I'm ready. So that's not how that went. And I remember in my late 20s, when I ended the relationship that I was in, I was like, you know what? I should probably freeze my eggs. I always thought I would be.

[Mandy B]

You had this thought in your late 20s?

[Zuri Hall]

Yes.

[Weezy]

Damn.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Zuri Hall]

I did not do it. And I don't believe in regrets.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Zuri Hall]

If I could do that one more time, I would. Because at the time, I was at NBC Universal still. So I've been at NBC for 10 years, but business wise, like, I was an employee for those first four or five years. The last half of my tenure there, I've been a loan out. I'm my own business. I pay myself. But that also means I'm covering my own insurance.

[Weezy]

Insurance.

[Zuri Hall]

I'm employed by Zuri Hall. And back then, because I was an employee, they had incredible benefits. So late 20s, broke up with the guy I was with, decided, I want to freeze my eggs. I was working nonstop. I was so busy. I tried calling. They were like, Call your insurance.

[Mandy B]

Do this.

[Zuri Hall]

Two days into that, I was like, I don't have time for this. I would literally rather just figure it out, whoever my man is, than go through all of this insurance stuff because it was so complicated. It wasn't easy, and I was busy, so I didn't do it. Even though they covered almost 100%. No way. I don't know what I was thinking. Well, I know I wasn't thinking because I was overworked and exhausted and just trying to get through the days so I didn't end up doing it, even though they covered almost the entire procedure. And then around early to mid-30s, I started thinking about it again. It was because there are things that I want in my life. I want to be married. I want to have children. I. I don't want anything in my life more than having it and making sure it feels right.

[Weezy]

A lot of the questions like we're. We're going to talk to about today are not even just the process, but, like, why? Yeah, because I think some of the things that was interesting to me. When Cami froze her eggs, I saw a lot of comments like, but you got a man.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

You know? And so, like, that's the ignorance, right?

[Mandy B]

They don't get it.

[Weezy]

They don't get it. I think it's great to talk about, like, even the quantity of kids they want to have or just whatever. We just are always sewing everybody else's coochie now. We're not gonna get in yours yet. We're not gonna wait. All right, so we have a few little games to play with you. And our favorite game, really, I feel like. Cause it's a fun one to play. Is poetry. But we're gonna do a song. Singing it like it's poetry or reading it like it's poetry. And you have to guess this song.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay?

[Weezy]

You absolutely know this song. Do what you gotta do. Keep me up all night hurting.

[Mandy B]

Period. Come on, Rihanna. Come on, Rihanna.

[Weezy]

Get it better. Yes, girl.

[Zuri Hall]

So good. Yeah.

[Mandy B]

So good stuff.

[Zuri Hall]

Like, I will record songs from 20 years ago. Okay, wait.

[Mandy B]

Now I want to give you one that.

[Zuri Hall]

Wait. Don't push me too much.

[Mandy B]

She said, all right, I got it.

[Weezy]

Next.

[Mandy B]

What's the next game? Like, this one took?

[Weezy]

I can't remember.

[Mandy B]

No, literally, that was 2, 2, 2, 2 me.

[Zuri Hall]

Lyrics are what?

[Weezy]

You know what?

[Mandy B]

You know what's crazy? I make up lyrics so much.

[Zuri Hall]

You don't know what?

[Mandy B]

I don't know what? Wait. I was like.

[Weezy]

You could literally say, to the window, to the wall. And I'M be like, where sweat drop.

[Mandy B]

Down the ball kind of window?

[Zuri Hall]

Where is sweat dropping?

[Mandy B]

Oh, no, no, no, no. Like, when I remember, I have a homeboy who loves R and B, and literally, like, we get to where we'll play, like, card games and shit, and it's R and B, and we're just singing at the top of our lungs altogether in unison. So he puts on. I want to say it's 112 cupid. And so it gets to a part, and I say, truth is. And they're like, did you just say truth? Truth is. Apparently it's Cupid. It's the name of the goddamn song. And I made up a whole nother line. And my last podcast used to be music bitch. I would literally be making up lyrics. That lyric, he's all made up.

[Zuri Hall]

Truth is.

[Weezy]

Is crazy.

[Mandy B]

Truth is that nuts.

[Zuri Hall]

The whole.

[Mandy B]

But it's Cupid. It's the title.

[Weezy]

Y' all know that young tongue song? Live, Live, Live loud.

[Mandy B]

Yes.

[Weezy]

I'm on a top. No one knows that lyric, do they?

[Zuri Hall]

Wait, do it more.

[Weezy]

Hold on, Wait. Did a lot of just live this life? What is it Came from the bottom to the top. My life's out. Live, live, live, live.

[Zuri Hall]

Leonard. I just hop in on lifestyle.

[Mandy B]

That's it. You know what I mean? Like, we didn't know what Missy was saying with.

[Weezy]

Apparently, it was reversed.

[Mandy B]

No, it was a sentence that was really reversed, but.

[Weezy]

She literally reversed it.

[Mandy B]

Bitch. And I was like, maybe this is another language. Because, wait, it was at the time when that came out. It was at the time when, like, we as hip hop. I will say I'm blaming y'. All culturally appropriated, like India. So they were, like, they had a lot. You say it like that, bro.

[Weezy]

So I'm thinking, like, those words didn't make it India.

[Zuri Hall]

It was the beat.

[Mandy B]

I mean, same thing. Maybe Asian got to mean something. It sound like it means something in Asian.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay.

[Weezy]

Now, I tried this other game. I just made this up, so I'm not. It's going to go. It's called 1, 2, 3.

[Mandy B]

Oh, okay.

[Weezy]

Next question. And I've never won. The second one is two.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Weezy]

And the next one is three.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay.

[Weezy]

You have to craft the perfect date night, but you could only go to one place. Where would it be? Think of the vibe. Is it an activity? Is there food in your mouth? Cocktails?

[Mandy B]

There's definitely food.

[Weezy]

All of it.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay.

[Weezy]

Where do you take someone for the perfect date?

[Zuri Hall]

Perfect date.

[Mandy B]

Oh, no. Where does she want to be taken to? Or where does she take someone?

[Weezy]

It doesn't have to be a first date. Okay? You're a date planning a great date.

[Zuri Hall]

One place. Oh, one place.

[Weezy]

See, I see.

[Zuri Hall]

I see what you want.

[Mandy B]

What's the one place?

[Zuri Hall]

I'll see you later at seven o'.

[Mandy B]

Clock, right?

[Zuri Hall]

This was such a fun afternoon. Okay, one place. That is a really fun question. I mean, it's kind of like cliche. Cliche, yes. But I think the reason it works, a spot like Dave and Buster's. Right? Or something where you can have an arcade. Yes, an arcade. Because they have food, they got drinks there. So you can have a little appetizer, little light bite, maybe one drink. I read something recently.

[Mandy B]

And then whoop his ass and then.

[Zuri Hall]

Do all of that.

[Mandy B]

You know what I mean?

[Zuri Hall]

You get to talk your ish, you get to go back and forth.

[Mandy B]

Yes.

[Zuri Hall]

Stakes are high. You can see what their competition game is like, how they get when they.

[Mandy B]

Are overly committed, when they lose it.

[Weezy]

My boyfriend just made a comment about. Okay, sorry, now I'm taking it somewhere. Sorry. We went on a throuple date. This girl we see and we took her to bowling. He was like, bowling, but we had already had sex. So it was our next date. But he was like, I don't really like activity dates because I feel like I'm not in the flirty vibe. Because we're too competitive and we're like. Now he's like, with bowling, like it's her turn, then you go play. Now it's me and her talking, then the other person.

[Mandy B]

No, how you flirt, that is. You gotta slap the ass after they get some. No, you gotta make it horny. You gotta start making best life.

[Zuri Hall]

You gotta make it horny.

[Mandy B]

Pins up. I get to lick them nipples tonight. Like I do. That is, I do that for Una. Like if you make it. If you don't want to make it like super friendly. If you want to make it sexual, like you just make every.

[Weezy]

You turn everything into a game though, because you separate. But I. I do like activity. If it's like playing games together, for sure.

[Zuri Hall]

And that makes it a little trickier to navigate. I've never navigated the throuple dynamic. So I would imagine when it's one and two and then one sitting back, that's a little tricky. Or vice versa. But I think, yeah, to your point, it can be whatever you make it, it can do with sexuality. You can just be chill, friendly.

[Weezy]

I don't feel like I'm a bird.

[Mandy B]

You don't have to do it. And if anyone has ever gone, I went On a date before I left New York to there's like an arcade in Chinatown. But it's like all these old school games and just from a nostalgic being in your 30s and playing PAC man and shit like that, I was like, oh, this is really cute, like. And so it was fun. And then after that you get to go get fucking dumplings and boba tea. Right?

[Weezy]

Exactly.

[Mandy B]

You know, well, that's adding to.

[Weezy]

Okay, now I'm gonna really sound like a hoe. Hear me out.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay? No judgment. Listening.

[Weezy]

I'm going to say no.

[Mandy B]

We listen and we judge.

[Zuri Hall]

We listen and we judge if I.

[Weezy]

Want the perfect date. So to me, the perfect date means you spend like all day together.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay.

[Weezy]

And I could only go one place. Okay, let's say we're in la. I'm gonna pick, let's say the addition. Okay, we're gonna go to the pool during the day, then we're gonna go.

[Mandy B]

To the spa that you're cheating.

[Weezy]

And then we're gonna have dinner.

[Zuri Hall]

I was told and was out of house.

[Mandy B]

We're gonna get it all saying.

[Weezy]

You see how she changed real quick just now? Here's number two.

[Zuri Hall]

Meanwhile, I'm at Dave and Buster's for two hours.

[Weezy]

Speaking of two. Not like what I need to be in mine's three. You meet your dream man, physically, you fine as fuck. But he can only excel in 2 out of the 5 love languages. So what are they going to be for? A reminder for everyone here. Words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service and physical touch. Fine, because he only going to be good at two.

[Zuri Hall]

That is a great question. My love languages were one thing for so many years. I got curious about myself and how I changed since the last time I took the test, which would have been seven or eight years ago.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Zuri Hall]

And was surprised to realize they stayed the same.

[Mandy B]

Oh, they changed.

[Zuri Hall]

Which is such a reflection of where I am in my life now. What matters now versus what mattered then. So these days my number one is quality time. So he's gotta be good at that. That matters to me. I work a lot. I would imagine he is very busy too. In a perfect world, he's doing something and that he loves and is passionate about. And so our time together becomes all the more sacred. So quality times important for me so that.

[Weezy]

Now what else does fine ass do? Ooh, you know what's crazy? When I say fine, I haven't in my head.

[Mandy B]

Those are my.

[Weezy]

Those are my two acts of service. I was gonna say acts of service.

[Mandy B]

And quality Time are my two.

[Zuri Hall]

Why are they for you?

[Mandy B]

So it used to be gifts and physical touch. I used to be like, if a man got me gifts and fucked me good, this is man. But now someone who can come in and just make my life simpler. Like, I want someone who adds and makes. Like, this is going to sound so cliche. We saying cliche shit up here today. But like saying you want someone to be your piece. So for me, if you can come in and make my life easier. Like. And it's so funny because one of the things that I mean, I get made fun of on here, if a man come to my house, like, my boyfriend just recently did it, and I was making one of my boyfriends, but he came over, spent some time in Atlanta. And before leaving for his flight, not only did he make my bed, he took the trash out. He don't even live.

[Zuri Hall]

Didn't have to ask.

[Mandy B]

Didn't have to ask. He started picking up the bags, the empty bottles. Cause we had a good time. And he's like, where's your dumpster at? I wanna make sure I take your trash out before I leave. And I'm just like.

[Weezy]

He listened to the vibe.

[Mandy B]

No, he's never. I'm joking. Well, we baked.

[Zuri Hall]

He ain't no nothing. He never listened to it. No.

[Weezy]

Brandon's had this trash king for five years.

[Mandy B]

Well, it's not even that. I was in my first relationship at 29, going into 30. Right. That relationship, how you said seven years ago, it was one way. Seven years later, it's another. It's because I went through this relationship and I was able to be like, this is what I like. And it had nothing to do with any gifts he bought me. Yes, sex was great, but it started to be. It was an intimate thing that I started appreciating with my partners. And then it changed to that. But those are my top two right there as well.

[Zuri Hall]

And.

[Mandy B]

And I don't think men know how to show up that way fully. So when you get it, like, a lot of men will lead with their wallets. So that's the gift giving, right? Then you have, of course, physical touch. You have a man that'll, you know, do all those things. And then words of affirmations has always been the last one. I don't need you to. I don't have a praise kick. And I know that that's something. But, yeah, the older you get those other two. Oh, baby, yeah, take out my trash. I'm going to be like this.

[Zuri Hall]

Giving trash kick. The trash kick.

[Mandy B]

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[Weezy]

Are you ready for the three?

[Zuri Hall]

Yes. Three. Yes.

[Weezy]

This one is simple. Now, I call it a hoe bag. I'm sure a nice lady like Zuri will call it the overnight bag.

[Zuri Hall]

Yes. My overnight bag.

[Weezy]

You can only put three things in the bag. Ooh, what are those three?

[Zuri Hall]

Oh, my God. Okay, overnight bag.

[Weezy]

Now, let's just say, you know, you know you're gonna be over there that night, but also he might take you somewhere the next day.

[Mandy B]

See, you're adding eggs.

[Zuri Hall]

No, no, no. That is a very.

[Weezy]

So let's just say it's not the fit, but what's in the.

[Zuri Hall]

What's in the bag and what do I need? I'm going to assume that there is Listerine toothpaste and an extra toothbrush at his house. So we don't.

[Mandy B]

Especially if he's a hoe, I would say. Oh, right. I think the extra toothbrush, bro. The extra toothbrushes for like, guests.

[Weezy]

For guests.

[Zuri Hall]

I do too.

[Mandy B]

I do too. But I. I mean, it's for the.

[Weezy]

I heard a hot take about the toothbrush thing. So one of my friends starts blacking about this dude having a lot of toothbrushes. I'm like, this just seems so normal to me. I know you're upset. She's like, I'm in Missouri.

[Mandy B]

Nobody's visiting his neighbors.

[Weezy]

She's like, maybe if you live in New York or la, people come through for the weekend. Ain't nobody's visiting. I mean, he's a hoe.

[Mandy B]

That's what I'm saying. I do believe that.

[Weezy]

I see people visit too.

[Zuri Hall]

I've seen that from point A to point B.

[Weezy]

Me too. So then I was like, maybe I need.

[Zuri Hall]

Is he a big family guy?

[Mandy B]

Maybe people do like that.

[Zuri Hall]

I love that.

[Mandy B]

Zuri was like, let me let y' all know my breath do not stink. But I'm gonna assum.

[Zuri Hall]

He got all that.

[Mandy B]

So I'm not pegging it for the record.

[Zuri Hall]

Dental hygiene is importante, period. But I'm Just.

[Mandy B]

You said he got it though. Okay.

[Zuri Hall]

Yes, yes, yes. Okay, so I am bringing. Can I bring an outfit? Change of clothes. You're saying I don't need to bring.

[Weezy]

Okay, bring a change of clothes. I.

[Zuri Hall]

Look, I am a very easy, low maintenance person. Honestly, I don't need much. A pair of panties, like a.

[Weezy]

You want your. You're bringing sexy lingerie that's in the bag.

[Zuri Hall]

Oh, no, I didn't even think about that.

[Mandy B]

She said a change of pair of cake. She said I would change the drawer tomorrow.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Also, sex and lingerie wouldn't be in the whole bag. Okay.

[Mandy B]

Not every man gets lingerie. That's a lot.

[Weezy]

I feel like you gotta.

[Mandy B]

We gotta plan that.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah. We gotta work out.

[Mandy B]

I'm not just bringing up lingerie over a man house. No way.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

And it's just like in my negative bag.

[Zuri Hall]

And it's probably not even.

[Weezy]

Okay. I'm not gonna lie. If it's the first time.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

These are gonna be the nicest things.

[Zuri Hall]

I'm pulling up in the those. Then if it's the first time, like, I don't need to.

[Mandy B]

Because you're gonna take them off. Because I ain't gonna change into it.

[Zuri Hall]

That feels a little bit dramatic to be like one second and then do it. Because when I've been in that moment, I'm like, this is stupid. I'm just.

[Weezy]

I'm stupid too. But what's your makeup essential for the next day?

[Zuri Hall]

Okay, makeup essential. I would say mascara and that's it. Because I just need to fluff my brows. I get them together and then I'll do a swipe so the lashes pop. And then I try to prioritize skincare. So I don't need to do it if I don't have to do like a full face. So. And I'm pretty much bare face when I'm not.

[Mandy B]

What are your three items?

[Weezy]

Well, lingerie, bonnet, lingerie, and my lip duo. I don't need makeup either, just the lip combo. But the thing with the bonnet, like, I. Hold.

[Zuri Hall]

Wait a second. Bonnet on. Is this a first night? Bring the bag either way. Okay.

[Weezy]

Oh, I. I want the bonnet on. I don't give a fuck. And also, I love that I have, like, my boyfriend. We've been together for two years now, but he got locked and so did.

[Zuri Hall]

The men before him.

[Weezy]

We all got bonnets on, girl. You should see when my mama called late night, we be to bed together. She'd be like, what are you.

[Mandy B]

Bonnet too?

[Zuri Hall]

Bonnet.

[Weezy]

That's what I sing when we go to bed.

[Zuri Hall]

I love it though. I love it.

[Weezy]

I also felt like when I was younger and I don't know if you guys can attest to this or maybe it's only me. I wanted to do a lot more before going to bed. I wanted to wake up a lot more different. I was like, oh, I gotta. Ah, ah, ah. Now not so much. But the lingery is actually more for me than that.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Because I like hearing that. I kind of feel like I'm lacking on me sometimes. Like I don't realize how much I am. Low effort. Sometimes I'll be like, I'm putting this pussy on you, Zuri. We do a sex pod. I know how to flow.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

So I just assume you're gonna get there and you should just be happy. That's not true. Like, I had really good sex recently. I was wearing a button up and I left it on. And he was like, you don't understand what that did to me. Like, I don't know. We so like used to nakedness. He's like. But I was just like, oh, I'm sneaking. He's like, I had this shit in my head. Like it was my teacher. I was like, so to me it's like we're not dressing. Yeah. So now it's made me want to step it up.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay. I'm not mad at it.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Weezy]

I'm not mad at it.

[Zuri Hall]

I like that.

[Weezy]

Should we move on to X? So I do want to ask you. The clip actually didn't pull up, but one of the clips that I had pulled up. We have a reactionary segment. I'm so sorry, this is so unprofessional for people watching. But one of the clips was a hot take. And the girl basically said, my hot take is. I'm sick of people saying that they need a boundary to show up for themselves. Like sometimes choosing ourself is a fault. Don't tell me if I had friends with my friends, but I chose myself, that it's my boundary. No show up for people.

[Zuri Hall]

And that sounds like a breeding ground for.

[Mandy B]

Yeah, I wish I could. Yeah.

[Zuri Hall]

But it was.

[Weezy]

No, it was an eight second clip. But one of the things that it made me think about was the egg freezing thing. Yeah. Are we choosing ourselves to a fault? And I asked this because before my partner, the last guy I dated, it was short lived. He was on the road, he was an actor and I didn't really live in la. So we're back and forth. But when I discussed egg freezing with him, he said, are you so jaded or like down or disappointed by love that your mind is solely focused on having kids alone.

[Zuri Hall]

I said, well, why does it have to be so binary? Why is it so black and white? Why, if I'm interested in this, am I afraid of dying alone? And that's my only option.

[Weezy]

Completely agree.

[Zuri Hall]

And protecting all of my options.

[Weezy]

So the thing he said that made me think about that clip was, I feel like I can't say this to you because you're just gonna be like, you wanna choose yourself. And he said so many times, I'm dating women where they're like, trying to tell me all these things like, me, me, me, me. And they say nothing that welcomes me into their life. And I actually thought egg freezing at that age. I wasn't 34, which I am now. But to me, if it was today, it's a plus for you.

[Zuri Hall]

Absolutely.

[Weezy]

What if you're meeting me at 40? And 40 is the scary age, I feel like, for women with childbirth. So wouldn't you be happy? So I really want to pose that question to you of like, do you think that your process had maybe been something that men you were dating or men that was in your life questioned?

[Zuri Hall]

That's a great question. No, actually, thankfully, I've not experienced that at the time, I was. So I've done four rounds. I've done four rounds. So it was essentially over the course of about a year I'd given myself. I'd promised myself that I was gonna get this done by the age of 36. I'm 37 now, so it was time. And I am an overachiever in pretty much everything. So even with my egg freezing, I'm like, I'm gonna freeze as many eggs as I can. And so for me to hit the number that I wanted to hit, I needed, I ended up needing three to four rounds. Four rounds, right. Wow.

[Mandy B]

Expensive.

[Zuri Hall]

Again, expensive. Cause those first three rounds were all out of pocket. Again, no insur. And it is not cheap.

[Mandy B]

Not only that, for you to do that as a working woman. And when I say working, it's a woman like my friend took a break from it because of how a exhausting it was to do it, but also you have to do your checkup. So she had to take off certain days of work. And so during the process, she's like, I missed out on so many days of work. Because, girl, you have your appointment and you gotta make it. So for you to do that for a full year is a lot of sacrifice professionally as well. And I don't Think people talk about that often, either.

[Zuri Hall]

It was. It was a lot.

[Weezy]

Let's get to Lanular about it then. Like, what exactly is the step one, Boom. I want to freeze my eggs. All I know about that is they hand you some shots to start shooting up your hormones. Like, yes, so what is it?

[Zuri Hall]

No. And I do want to say that, but just to answer that question, really, about the men in. In one life, I will say it to me, helps me understand more quickly where a man was in his life and what he did. Right. Because if a man was looking forward to fatherhood, it comforted him. Where sometimes I think men, deep down, whether they'll admit it or not, if they meet a woman of a certain age and they know they want to be a dad one day, it's like, oh, you're incredible. You're brilliant. You're beautiful. You're whatever. You're also whatever this is.

[Mandy B]

And your biological clock is ticking. It might be hard.

[Zuri Hall]

So either I don't want to feel pressured with you to have this baby asap, even though I know I want one eventually, or I as a man, and maybe deep down wondering, can you even have my babies once the time is right.

[Mandy B]

And that's a question that I think a lot of men, luckily, now with the conversation a lot. Men are either too shy to ask that question around fertility, especially an older woman who has no kids. It's like, can you even have them? And that becomes a conversation unfortunately, too, it's one that is touchy online because it's like, there's not a really respectful way to ask that.

[Zuri Hall]

It's hard.

[Mandy B]

It's hard. It just is. It's a complicated question to ask someone. And you. It's one of those, like, where. You know how they say you shouldn't ask a woman her age? That's there, too. You shouldn't ask a woman where's her kid or why she doesn't have kids. It's one of those questions where you're just not supposed to be really asked.

[Weezy]

Yeah, but you shouldn't ask if they have kids.

[Mandy B]

No, you shouldn't ask, why don't you have kids yet? Oh, why don't you know? It's one of those personal. It's a personal thing that we're taught don't even.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that is also frustrating. I empathize with and have compassion for the men and the women in this equation. Right. Because if I'm a man, I want to know what I'm signing up for. It doesn't mean I Won't still sign up for it. But then there is some. Some hesitation around being inappropriate, crossing a line, triggering a woman potentially, which you don't want to do. But these are conversations that I think we men and women need to get more comfortable having with each other. I will say this last round, these last rounds that I was doing, I was traveling a lot. I was doing injections. I remember I was doing them before and after award shows.

[Weezy]

How long are you doing it for?

[Zuri Hall]

Red carpet. I was. I had to inject from my car because the red carpet wrapped at a certain.

[Mandy B]

Oh, it has to be every time the same. The same day. Yeah, same time, every day.

[Zuri Hall]

Wherever I was at 9:15pm didn't matter. Did not matter. So those needles were everywhere with me. I learned to travel like a pro. TSA PreCheck. They hated to see me come because it was a bag full of needles, syringes, formulas. I was hosting a gala in London. And so suddenly I'm having to do the math.

[Mandy B]

The math for the time difference at.

[Zuri Hall]

Like 1am or what. Whatever it was to do the shots.

[Weezy]

The.

[Zuri Hall]

I was dating at the time, you know, and it impacts your.

[Mandy B]

It impacts how you. When you can have sex too, right?

[Zuri Hall]

Or no. Yeah. Wait, that's a good question. It does. Not really.

[Mandy B]

Not really. Okay.

[Zuri Hall]

You can do what you're gonna do. The only time that that sort of becomes a part of consideration is around the time that you're about to retrieve retrieval daily shots, especially immediately post retrieval. You don't want any.

[Mandy B]

Post retrieval. You can't. You don't want anyone in there.

[Zuri Hall]

Yes. Guys. You're just so uncomfortable. Loaded. So.

[Weezy]

So daily. And how long does. Do you take shots?

[Zuri Hall]

So cycles normally, like, retrieval cycles essentially, normally go between 10 to 14 days of daily or nightly injections. You work with your doctor to determine what time that's going to be. They obsessively monitor your hormone levels. So for this last round that I did actually with ova egg freezing in Chicago. They're incredible. I highly recommend them. I was going into the office probably every other day.

[Weezy]

Wow.

[Zuri Hall]

Just to do my blood work, to check my hormone levels, to do the ultrasound and see how big and juicy those follicles. The answer.

[Mandy B]

Well, the window's so small, if anything's off, they'll have to, like, change your dose. Like, they'll have to switch medication immediately to help.

[Weezy]

Yeah.

[Zuri Hall]

Every day. That's good. Oh, we're going up on this hormone. We need to rein it in on this. It is truly a science. And So I say 10 to 14. Because you could think it's going to take you 10 days, it could take you 14. Your body needs more hormones or ooh, these eggs get real big. We need to take them out now because they have to be a certain size, overly ripe. Like if they mature and then get beyond that, they still get tossed, Right? If they don't mature enough, they get tossed. I used to think when I first came into this, oh, however many eggs y' all see on the ultrasound, let's go. That's how many of them are coming out. But that's not the case. So even when they retrieve them, let's say Hypothetically, you get 16 eggs drawn, right? And I'm not talking about my number specifically, but just for example, 16 eggs drawn, you still have to wait another day or so to find out how many of those survived retrieval and were actually mature enough to be frozen. So 16 you drew could easily become nine or 10 frozen eggs.

[Mandy B]

And I think the other part that has been the most interesting that I just found out as well is not only is this process costly, right? You have to pay for storage.

[Zuri Hall]

Yep.

[Weezy]

$900.

[Mandy B]

You have to pay for storage of the eggs until you decide to use them, until you find a partner.

[Weezy]

Until.

[Mandy B]

And like, my friend had. One of my friends had her eggs retrieved. Oh, my God, maybe like four years ago now. And so to hear about, like, like how she gotta pay a credit card card, note, rent, there's a storage fee for her to be. For those eggs to be stored.

[Weezy]

So it's stored in a cryo facility. Like, people listening that think the storage is crazy. Yes. You really do. And it's basically, to me, it's part of this thing where we had a friend of ours, friend of the show and author Liz Goldwyn. So she's also a sexpert sex author and has her books on it. And she said to me when I was about to egg freeze, I feel like you have now been part of this fear mongering. I said this to her at 30. I feel like you've been part of this fear mongering. You just told me your mom had you at 40. Why are you so fucking scared? Stop freaking out. Don't put your body through this. Just try. First, there's Chinese medicine. There's all these different ways. Everybody I know is having kids later. Like, why are you obsessing about this egg freezing? And basically said to me, like, do you understand how much it'll cost you later if you do it young? Like, what if you end up getting pregnant? And you're just sitting here holding on. And part of that thing was storage.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

She's like, it'll be a constant reminder of just like, boom, here it is here. Don't forget, blah, blah, blah. And she's like, there's a lot tied to even having those eggs in the world.

[Mandy B]

Can I ask you a question?

[Weezy]

Egg freezing, by the way.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay.

[Mandy B]

I was gonna ask you that question. Have you had a woman question your decision for that? And how does that make you like.

[Zuri Hall]

Absolutely.

[Mandy B]

Like, what were those conversations?

[Zuri Hall]

Kind of made me be.

[Mandy B]

I saw it in my face.

[Weezy]

Liz is on our book. We Love Liz. Liz was Talking to a 30 year old girl who was freaking out and very scared about never finding love. So I want to thank Liz for that conversation because I do think that we can encourage people both ways. There are people that are obsessive and overly scared and freaking out. And I think that really was what I needed at the time.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Because it is true. She's like, there are a lot of times you'll go into a doctor, she's like, nothing's fucking wrong with you, bro. They're pushing you. They want you to spend this money. Don't let some male doctor push you the wrong way.

[Zuri Hall]

I agree with her about that. And she's spot on. I think it's two distinct and yet sort of neighborly conversations. Right. There is a conversation around the emotions that come with our fertility or lack thereof, our future children or lack thereof. And. And then there's also a conversation around just the process. And sometimes when those two things intersect, I think because women, people I love and trust, people who are strangers, who are giving unsolicited opinions to me.

[Mandy B]

Right.

[Zuri Hall]

Have said, do you really think you need to do that? Are you still so young? Or girl I got pregnant at 42 or whatever. And I love to hear those stories of people getting pregnant at 40, 40 plus. I'm not saying I can't or wouldn't be one of those people. I'm not even entirely sure that I wouldn't try naturally first. Right. But for me, it was truly a conscious decision to just give myself another option. Most people, statistically speaking, most women who freeze their eggs do not end up falling in for the sake of. And you're using them. They end up getting pregnant naturally or not going on a pregnancy journey themselves. And yet overwhelmingly, they've acknowledged that they still did not regret the choice. The choice because it felt like they bought themselves some peace of mind.

[Weezy]

What ages did you do it at?

[Zuri Hall]

I did it between the ages of about 34 or 35 when I started. It was pretty much. Pretty much my 35th year of life that I was, like, knocking it out. I was done by 36, so I think sometime in that window. But again, I gave myself till 36.

[Mandy B]

So I know it's funny. One of my friends who froze her eggs, doesn't want children, Is still paying for the storage just in case it changes. She thought she wanted children when she got them frozen. Really could. Well, first off, ain't even got a man. She like. She's like, girl, I gotta find somebody I like first.

[Zuri Hall]

She's like, it might take 20 years.

[Mandy B]

You know, but literally is in a phase now where it doesn't even want kids. But it's still. Because, you know, we all do change our minds.

[Zuri Hall]

That's it.

[Mandy B]

So I like your response and just saying, like, listen, what might not work for you may work for someone else. It's strange because I had a. And it's still everywhere if you guys want to go listen to it. I'm really big on just reproductive health for women, especially with all of the things that my closest friends have had to deal with. And one of the things specifically about me being a woman who doesn't want kids. It was very important for me to support any woman's decision to choose to have eggs. But not only that, when you look at genetically within your family, like my other friend who had the breast cancer, there was an urge for her sister to have a double mastectomy. Didn't find anything. But when things run in your bloodline and things like that, you gotta do things in a preventative care way that really, like, it's important for anyone listening to push your friends to do preventative care.

[Zuri Hall]

Totally.

[Mandy B]

Like, because I like that. Whether you decide to use them or not, whether, you know, I think this.

[Weezy]

Is actually a very nuanced convo. It is, I believe, what Liz told me to this day. If she would have pushed me to do that, it would have heightened my fear that I was already building on where I was in that moment, which a lot of people are, which is why I want to keep reiterating it. And also, this is someone that I really love and trust and know is so pro everything. The woman's been talking about sex and documenting it for over 20 years of her life. There are a lot of people that choose egg freezing because of love and partnership over themselves. There was nothing about me when I came to her. And that, to me, that scarcity mindset of, like, I'm gonna die Alone shit is really a fucking problem. That now I'm thinking of this.

[Mandy B]

I don't know.

[Weezy]

I must say, like, the mindset that you have to be in for egg freezing is also a strong one because it's a lot on your body. So it's like, I'm already in this flighty mood of going through a breakup. It was old bae. He's someone I wrote about in a book. And I was like, oh, my God. So now there's no one.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Because to me, there's gotta be a lot of power in this choice.

[Zuri Hall]

You're right.

[Weezy]

And I felt like I didn't have it.

[Zuri Hall]

That is. I really appreciate that perspective. I have friends who've gone through the process with that feeling. I have been afraid, don't get me wrong. I've had moments looking up and saying, like, I am gonna die long. This is what we're doing, right? But overwhelmingly, like I said, there's nothing I want more than doing it or getting it in the right way, the way that feels right for me. And so as much as I want marriage, I want kids, I'm never gonna rush that process. So it wasn't from a place of fear. It was just from a place of. I know I'm never gonna choose out of desperation, which means I might be single for a while. Let me just do this thing over here, because I know for sure I want children. So I will say there were a lot of emotions with it. I didn't feel fear so much as sometimes crushing loneliness, like, you know, injecting yourself every night through a chapter of singleness. And there were moments where I was angry. I didn't even know what you were angry at life, at how unfair it can be for women to have to be the ones to carry this labor. Sometimes I know I'm injecting, and I'm doing it for me. Because I want to be a mom. I know that hands down. But some I also know I want to do it with a part that I know those two things right? And so going through those injections, exhausted, working nonstop, traveling, paying out of pocket.

[Weezy]

I got a dog.

[Zuri Hall]

Like, I got deals to pay. And I'm doing this. And it's like, what am I doing this for? Who am I doing this for? When will I even see a return on this? So in certain moments, yeah, I get overwhelmed. And the emotions would skew into sort of negativity or overwhelmed, but more than that. And I mean, the major 80% of my experience was rooted in empowerment. I felt like I was giving Myself a gift that I had the privilege.

[Mandy B]

Of being able to afford to afford.

[Zuri Hall]

It is expensive, right?

[Weezy]

How much did you spend?

[Zuri Hall]

So each cycle you've kind of got, you're looking at around 7 to 8,000 just to kind of get it done. But then the medicine, that's what is not considered. I think I certainly didn't give much pop to it until it was time for me.

[Mandy B]

And it was like $1200.

[Zuri Hall]

He probably spent like 3 to 4k.

[Mandy B]

A pop just, just on the medication.

[Weezy]

Hormones.

[Zuri Hall]

You need more. Yeah, you need more meds. You thought you were doing a 10 day round. Now you're doing 14 days. Four more days is easily hundreds if not into the thousands of dollars depending on what your dosages are. Right.

[Mandy B]

And you have to keep them cool, like keep them in a temperature.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah, it's a lot.

[Mandy B]

Especially if you're traveling. You got to do the ice pack. You got to do it' like science project.

[Zuri Hall]

Andrew Schultz had his kid through IVF.

[Weezy]

And recently like donated so much money and like did all these like fundraisers for it. And it was so random to see, but I was like, yo, it really is like when you're living with money from a place of privilege and being like, these problems affect everybody.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Like, I never considered how expensive it would be until my homegirl was like, borrow verbatim conversation. I'm borrow fifteen hundred dollars.

[Zuri Hall]

I'm like casual.

[Weezy]

I was like, yeah, we've been good friends a long time, but she's got money. Like, you know, she's not down and out. So it's a weird. Like this bitch ain't never asked me for money. She like, look, I'm about to quit my job, but they covering half the eggs. So I thought, let me get this done before it's more expensive. And I know you gonna say hell yes to this. And I was like, oh yeah. Hell yes. So when I asked her how much it was, she said I'm gonna have to spend about 6,500, that my job is covering the rest. There's 12 total. And she said, I actually don't want to spend this money. I'd prefer to buy a house. But I realized these are one of the expenses of my life that are going to cost a lot of money. And it's something that I think can't wait before the home rates will go down and so are my eggs. She's like, I'm gonna do this year right now. And I encourage anyone listening the Facebook group, Mandy, advice, like the advice you offered also like with insurance there's different type of places, like, and the grants and the fundraisers. Did not know you could actually get an egg freezing grant. Google this online. A lot of families are, like, donating themselves. A lot of rich people that had all these x1 2 kids like Elon, trust me, there's a lot out there. So don't feel too discouraged by hearing that. Big number, 7,000. Like, they got 0 APR credit card. 0% APR credit cards. Like, I think there's a way. But one thing that's super interesting to talk about, you said that you want to have a kid with a partner. I love hearing that because sometimes with egg freezing, we'd be like, okay, well, where are you gonna go? Is Brian Bake gonna pick a friend?

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Do you think that saying, it sounds. There's so many beacons of strength. Like, we just saw Ebony K. Williams have a baby at home. And I was like, oh, damn, that's so. Like, fuck, yeah. But at the same time, I've sometimes felt so silly by saying I want to wait for someone. So what do you think?

[Zuri Hall]

No, I appreciate hearing that. I do think, you know, especially because I'm a woman who it's like, in one breath, I'm saying it empowered me to freeze my eggs. And, you know, I'm my own person. And then on the other side, I'm like, but I want to part man. Take these babies with, you know, but, like, that is the duality of life, of being a woman. Like, two things can be true at once. And so I love hearing that because I felt similarly where it's kind of like, now this is the part I have to admit. I do want the partner. I want the marriage. I want the husband. I want to create a family unit that looks and feels like my family unit in certain ways and different others.

[Weezy]

But I want that.

[Mandy B]

What I love about what you're saying, too, is they confuse the word empowered when a woman says it to mean this masculine we hate man movement. And it's like, you can be an empowered woman and want a partner or a man right next to you, too. Sexual liberation, empowerment, feminism. All these things have been related to women who hate men. And I can be an empowered, powerful woman and still want the traditional looks of a relationship or want a man by my side. So I love that, you know, like, two things can be true. Bitch. I'm empowered and I still want a man.

[Zuri Hall]

That's part. That is exactly it.

[Weezy]

Like, I don't think there's anything wrong with saying that, like, you know, seeking partnership or Love is like, that shit is okay. Like, bitch, I be bored. I don't like going out to the club alone. I want my homegirl to come think I want to fuck alone.

[Mandy B]

I'm tired.

[Weezy]

Right, Right.

[Mandy B]

Can I ask you if you. And this. If. I don't know if this is a good question or not to ask you, but I'm. But it went to my mind, as a woman still aging, there also is a thing, by the way, once you're like, 34, you're a geriatric pregnancy.

[Weezy]

Right.

[Mandy B]

And so is there a timeline that you have for yourself bringing back Ebony again, she had a timeline. If I don't get a partner by this, I'm still going forward with it because, again, complications can arise. Do you have a timeline, or would you be open to surrogacy? If you feel like I am open to surrogacy, you are open to surrogacy. Okay, already.

[Zuri Hall]

I would like to experience the journey of pregnancy for myself.

[Mandy B]

Right.

[Zuri Hall]

God is gonna do what I'm determined, and that path is gonna be laid out, how it will be. So I am not so attached to the idea of that that I would be devastated.

[Mandy B]

I like that.

[Zuri Hall]

A lot of therapy, a lot of years of learning, just detach. I'll set.

[Weezy]

Who knows, you know, Judging for surrogacy, though, did you see how the world treated Kim Kardashian? Now? We all thought, oh, her body. She doesn't want to fuck up her body. But I'm like, no, there are health risks.

[Mandy B]

There's a lot of health risks. I think what's great about what you said, and I'm a Bravo, girly. So I love that these conversations, period. I love that these conversations, like the IVF conversation. Kandy went through, surrogacy. Shamia is also, you know, showing her journey going through that. I think specifically as black women with that, because it's the white girl on New York that her dad was going through that. But I think that it's really dope that now these conversations are being put into entertainment because this is why we're learning about it. These are why we're able to have these conversations. And hopefully, people listening are like, oh, shit, I didn't know this. Like, they're. And they do want to hear us talking about sucking dick on this show. Right? But because it's entertainment. But in the ways that we're experiencing entertainment, these are the conversations that people are interested in hearing about. What is this journey about? What does it feel like? What are the emotions? In what ways? If this is what I have to consider. Do I navigate this for myself and specifically as black women holding the space for these conversations. It's so important. So I appreciate that.

[Zuri Hall]

Absolutely.

[Mandy B]

Just for you, wanting you open to sharing this.

[Zuri Hall]

No, absolutely. I'm more than happy to. Is that me? Did my phone.

[Weezy]

Don't worry. Don't.

[Mandy B]

That's how y' all feel.

[Weezy]

The eggs are calling, like, hey, like.

[Zuri Hall]

To patch us in. We have something.

[Weezy]

I just googled how much surrogacy costs, and for insurance, it says between 10 to $30,000. Yeah, it's expensive.

[Zuri Hall]

It was mine. Were. My rounds were averaging about 14.

[Weezy]

No surrogacy.

[Zuri Hall]

Surrogacy.

[Mandy B]

Surrogacy is a whole nother cost. Girl, you got to be rich. You got to be rich for the surrogacy.

[Zuri Hall]

Girl, listen now.

[Mandy B]

You got to be rich for all this.

[Weezy]

You choose your baby mama. Cause let me tell you what I would do.

[Mandy B]

Wait, but baby mama, right?

[Zuri Hall]

For surrogacy, at first, I was like.

[Weezy]

So I feel like if I go through an agency, if I had to do surrogacy. Do you remember the movie Baby Mama?

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Weezy]

Do you remember with Tina Fey? It was Amy Poehler, and then she had her baby, but they were like. She was like kind of trailer park. They had to move in. So in my head, I'm like, oh, my God, I'm gonna have a horror story. So I feel like I would do my best to choose someone that I know, don't know, and see if maybe someone that doesn't want to have children and maybe see if they'd be comfortable with it.

[Zuri Hall]

Oh, so you are considering finding someone to be a surrogate that I know someone who would go through that process for?

[Weezy]

Because I wonder if, like, what kind of connection would I want with this person? And if I chose someone from a website. Baby Mama used to be one of my favorite movies to throw on as a teenager. And I literally.

[Zuri Hall]

I think it's that trauma that you carry from watching the movie that's just.

[Weezy]

Also thinking, like, what if you just started eating bullshit. Maybe I'm just some person, and you really need to just get some bread at the end of the day. Maybe you don't. You're not doing this.

[Mandy B]

Because I want someone who has seven kids. I want someone who knows how to be pregnant. I want someone who done had the baby, knows how to be pregnant.

[Weezy]

It's funny.

[Mandy B]

I want a woman who know how to be pregnant. It's real.

[Weezy]

Cause, like, I want to you you to eat Super Greens 100%. Do y' all know Miles the music kid? Have you ever seen him, his little white boy? He could hear a note and fucking play it and, like, just do all this shit. He's like super, super, super smart, but he. That's like millions of followers. And someone left in the comments to his mother, what did you eat? What was different? And I'm for real, like, what y' all doing here? I want that kid speaking Japanese to come out.

[Mandy B]

You know what's crazy? You saying that is because they have it. He might be autistic. And there's only. No, no, no. But in a good way. When there's baby geniuses, you want to lean into genius. Like that phrase instead of autism.

[Weezy]

But Tylenol, we got to get Tylenol. Oh, my God, here we go.

[Mandy B]

All right.

[Zuri Hall]

This is the part where I smile.

[Mandy B]

She said, just so you know, I do not share the thoughts and opinions of the bitches on this podcast. I'm just a guest.

[Weezy]

Shut up, Pin evil. Now to wrap it. Just would love to know who is your support system during this time.

[Zuri Hall]

I love that question. I'm super close with my family. I've gotten closer to my mother. I've always been really close with both of my parents, but I've always been a daddy's girl. Like, we were just so sinked in. And for those 20s, when I was navigating the workplace and climbing and conquering like, that's my dude. I'm calling Joe. My mom, we've always been really tight. As I have thought more about motherhood thought and gone through this journey of, you know, egg freezing. I have such an appreciation for her that I couldn't have before I started thinking in that way.

[Mandy B]

I love that.

[Zuri Hall]

And so my mom has been an incredible sort of side by side person in this calling me. She would sometimes sit with me on FaceTime when I was doing the injections just so that I didn't have to feel alone. There was someone there to witness this part of my journey, which otherwise would have felt very isolating. But I would say it's. It's my parents, it's my family, my best friends. I have beautiful, incredible women in my life, and we are so locked in on supporting each other's personal, professional, emotional journeys. So my best friend, you know, she's in Phoenix, but she was always there if I needed to talk, if I needed to download. It's. Yeah, it's actually a really special thing to go through because even though doing it can feel isolating or maybe you feel so alone. You realize you have this incredible tribe, this incredible community of people who, particularly if you're going through it as a single person who doesn't want to be single forever, you're reminded of all the people who show up for you in that. That gap. So for me, it's the family, it's the loved ones.

[Weezy]

Good. Like, I think finding an anchor through any intense medical, even, like, I'm just thinking because you're. You're motioning like the stomach, even weight loss. One of my homegirls just started fucking ozipping and she be calling me really, like, struggling through how she feels about it. She's like, damn, I thought I loved my body, but now I'm loving myself in a way that makes me feel like, did I hate myself? Like, I think any kind of change that we're going through, we really do need to find that person that we can spill all to. If therapy isn't for you. Because some people, I don't know, it doesn't work for them. I do my best. And sometimes it can be seasonal with friends. Right. Like, I'm sure when I become a mom, I may become closer to certain friends I wasn't for. Right now, I like my whole friends. I got a man. I like going to the club. You know what I'm saying?

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

So, like, I think really finding that anchor. And I like that you've got your family. For those who don't, like, get that girl squad going. Ladies listening. Seriously, like, if there's someone that you haven't talked to in a while, pick up the phone.

[Zuri Hall]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Making sure that, like, we're really investing in those friendships because even your partner may not be easy to talk to.

[Zuri Hall]

For situations totally or just wouldn't understand no matter how hard they may try. And I appreciate you saying that because it was only after I started speaking out publicly about this a couple of years ago. Friends I have, obviously not my besties, we would have talked about it, but that I've broken bread with. We've talked about over wine, about all the things. They never brought it up. And so once I came out publicly, they were texting me like, oh, my God, girl, I did it five years ago. How you ain't say nothing then?

[Mandy B]

Because I should have probably knocked it out again. These are things sometimes we don't openly share. You do it by yourself. That's why I said, I love this comment.

[Zuri Hall]

Realize, like, man, she felt like she had to just do that. And there was way more shadowy stigma around it then than there is now. Or there were friends who were like, oh, my God, I didn't know. You did ask so many questions. I had my first meeting with a doctor or a friend telling me I just booked my first consultation and I found out I've got fibroids or I've got whatever. But I'm so glad that it pushed them to do it, because now you know the information is power, and now you know what to do with it. It might suck. I know we get tempted to stick our heads in the sand for things that are uncomfortable or overwhelming, myself included. But I promise I won't promise I'll speak for myself. I would rather know what I am working with or not working with so that I can make a conscious and informed decision than just keep putting it off because I'm afraid of the answer. Because the answer is gonna be my reality regardless, and I'd rather not wait until the last minute. So the friends who have popped in like, hey, can you tell me more? I've actually been curious. It made me realize so many of us women, particularly in our 30s and beyond, have been navigating this, if only internally, and I hope through conversations like these, we just kind of remove the stigma. It's not. It's serious, but it's not that. It doesn't have to be that serious there.

[Weezy]

Someone else has done it. Like, you gonna know someone else has done it.

[Mandy B]

I mean, it's the same way as women. We used to be embarrassed to have to go get pads and tampons out the store. And the older you get, the more normalized and comfortable you are with it. So that's the way we have to treat these types of conversations.

[Weezy]

And most times, like, women will really offer themselves up to you. Like, I've had so many fibroid experiences in the last year. I heard some girls, I feel like they happy now, But I know when I jumped in that convo at a random dinner, they were like, bitch, you don't shut the fuck up about it. But I was eating alone at Alba. It was so good. And these girls were, like, freaking out by fried boys. I'm like, so sorry to jump in.

[Zuri Hall]

Can I chime in here? I fit in.

[Weezy]

Ufe too. Wasn't greatest. Try this. And they were, like, really grateful at the end of the dinner.

[Zuri Hall]

And.

[Weezy]

And I'm telling you, like, the way we can all show up for each other. But again, what happened to me, My experience with being suggested egg freezing was by a male doctor who's very pushy about it, that sometimes that medical phobia of like, you're already, like, fearful of the doctor, and now they make you more scared. Like, there's gotta be a warm place. And so we hope we were that for you today. And I know that you guys are mad because you want to know who Zuri fucking has.

[Mandy B]

She like it.

[Weezy]

Zuri, before you get out of here, tell them where to find you, but also tell them your favorite position. I don't want to know.

[Zuri Hall]

I don't want to be like, tell them who you're effing and where.

[Weezy]

Tell them your favorite position.

[Zuri Hall]

I don't think I want to do that. Okay, what's the first question?

[Weezy]

Favorite position?

[Zuri Hall]

That was the second question, but I'll answer it first.

[Weezy]

I say, who? You Me asking them.

[Mandy B]

She said, I'm a virgin.

[Weezy]

I'm a virgin. Okay, I'll make it a really nice question for you. Here's how we want to know. Are you looking down or are you.

[Zuri Hall]

Looking in his eyes? Oh, as like a hit. Are you behind? It just depends. I'm a Gemini, so trust me when I say I am a very. People would be surprised to experience me in all of my dimensions.

[Mandy B]

I love it. In all my dimensions.

[Zuri Hall]

In all of my dimensions. It depends on the day because of that. That's not me trying to get out of anything.

[Weezy]

Zuri, she also, by the way, has on very little hoops. And you know what they say, the bigger the hoop. So not for Zuri.

[Zuri Hall]

Oh, my God, Wait, I'm not even taking this video. Can you do it? I like to keep it fun and I like to switch things up and I like to, you know, we'll put.

[Weezy]

Some resources if we can. We'll ask. We'll put the name of that place in Chicago. We'll put as many resources as we can to help Egg freezing in the description. I will remind myself to do this.

[Zuri Hall]

Because I have ADD and I have a highlight roll. Go to my Instagram. I've got highlighters, Q and A's, all things as they're cool, for sure. I have so much content on Instagram where followers have asked me and I'm super transparent. I get into the supplements I've taken. I'm a big advocate for Eastern medicine. In addition to Western pract. I was doing acupuncture, E stem, all the things. So go there for that. And then also, can I plug a little something real quick?

[Weezy]

Yes.

[Zuri Hall]

Okay, so we just want you to join the waitlist. I have a new show that by the time this comes out, may be premiering. Hello. It will so yes. So you'll see it on Instagram if it's happened by then. But I also have a wait list. Joinzurievip.com you'll be the first to know. I'm really excited about it.

[Mandy B]

I like it. I like it.

[Weezy]

You want to name your show.

[Zuri Hall]

So the show is called not about Sports and it is an incredibly fun, irreverent and thoughtful series. Interview series with some of the world's biggest sports stars. Athletes wag sports adjacent personalities. Yes. Which is very fun about everything. Except. Except for I like that we're talking about the stories, not the stats.

[Weezy]

Like it.

[Zuri Hall]

I'm very excited.

[Weezy]

Where can we get it? Where can we watch?

[Zuri Hall]

So it's digital so you'll be able to watch on YouTube depending on when this airs. You can watch it now on YouTube, YouTube.com hazelryhall and then also we're doing short form on Instagram, so if you see it there.

[Weezy]

Got it.

[Mandy B]

I love that.

[Zuri Hall]

Yes. Yes.

[Mandy B]

Well, thank you, Zuri, so much for joining us.

[Zuri Hall]

Thank you.

[Mandy B]

If you guys want to check out Horrible Decisions, which, yes, still does exist, you have to go over to Patreon. That's patreon.com backslash. Look, I never know which camera Horrible Decisions. Also, if you have not yet, no holds barred, a dual manifesto of sexual exploration and power. Go ahead and get that book wherever you purchase your books. Anyways, guys, thank you guys so very much for tuning in to another episode of Decisions Decision.

[Weezy]

Bye, everybody.

[Zuri Hall]

This is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human.