Podcast Summary: Decisions, Decisions
Episode 462: Third Engagement’s The Charm Pt. 1 (feat. Sarah Fontenot)
Released: March 2, 2026
Host(s): Mandii B & WeezyWTF | Guest: Sarah Fontenot (host of It's Giving Podcast)
Episode Overview
This episode of "Decisions, Decisions" focuses on the complexities of modern relationships, marriage, and personal boundaries, featuring an open and unfiltered conversation with guest Sarah Fontenot. The discussion ranges from celibacy and the role of sex before marriage, to the impact of personal histories and trauma, engagement and marriage expectations, infidelity, and controversial views on friendships across gender. The episode exemplifies the podcast’s trademark honest, raw, and humorous approach to dismantling traditional assumptions about love, sex, and partnership.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Introduction & Context
- Sarah’s Recent Marriage: The hosts celebrate Sarah’s six-month marriage milestone, revealing she kept her marriage secret before a later wedding celebration.
- “You kept it a secret, and then you celebrated and posted it online.” (01:53, Mandii)
- No Sex Before Marriage: It’s revealed that Sarah waited until marriage for sex, sparking disbelief and curiosity from the hosts.
- “Like, I’m not marrying somebody without knowing what that dick do.” (03:27, Mandii)
2. Cultural Background & Family Dynamics
- Canadian Upbringing & Mixed Identity: Sarah shares her experience growing up Black and Native American in Regina, Saskatchewan, and how that shaped her dating life and sense of identity.
- “Not only am I Canadian, I’m from Saskatchewan. Regina. Saskatchewan, actually.” (08:03, Sarah)
- Parental Influence & Relationship Models: Sarah notes her parents’ “flawless” marriage (no fights in front of the kids) gave her unrealistic expectations about conflict in relationships.
- “I never saw my parents fight my whole life. And because I never saw my parents fight, I thought that when I fought getting into relationships, I was broken...” (10:06, Sarah)
3. Traumatic Relationship Experiences
- First Engagement & Abuse: Sarah recounts her first engagement at 18 to a Canadian football player, detailing a violent incident that ended both the relationship and her connection with a former friend.
- “He almost paralyzed me. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He beat me up... it only happened one time.” (25:04, Sarah)
- “I own it. Accountability. I own it. I should have never went there. I knew he had company... but also... I felt like that was God telling me, not him.” (30:41, Sarah)
- Mandii & Weezy On Surviving Abuse: Both hosts empathize, sharing their own experiences and reflecting on how trauma informs their approach to conflict and self-worth.
- “The memory I had that really made me leave him was my mom begging him to not hit me anymore. It’s just something about her desperation.” (33:07, Weezy)
4. Engagements, Marriage, and Societal Pressures
- Multiple Engagements & Value of ‘the Ring’: Sarah discusses how her previous engagements altered her view of relationships, leading to opting for marriage without an engagement in her current relationship.
- “I feel like people put so much on fiancé, but a fiancé is a glorified girlfriend... there’s no safety inside a fiancé.” (13:11, Sarah)
- “If you’re engaged for longer than two years, you probably ain’t gonna get married.” (14:51, Sarah)
- Marriage Backwards: Sarah and her current husband went from friends to married, then celebrated with a wedding later—a timeline she attributes to lessons learned from past relationships.
5. Sexual Compatibility, Celibacy, and Dealbreakers
- Sex Before Marriage: The hosts challenge the wisdom of waiting until marriage for sex, exploring hypothetical dealbreakers like erectile dysfunction.
- “What if your husband had ED and you ain’t know? Would you call off the wedding?” (16:04, Mandii)
- “I’d be like... me and my husband getting a boyfriend. You are not making me pump your dick every time...” (17:21, Mandii)
6. Infidelity and Integrity Debates
- Cheating: Who’s to Blame? Hot takes abound as the group discusses whether the “other woman” is ever at fault, with Weezy staunchly defending sex workers and side chicks, while Sarah emphasizes personal integrity.
- “How can we blame this woman?... Men use women all the time... Men should be used.” (49:03, Weezy)
- “You gave our resources to another female... Take him.” (46:42, Sarah)
- “If you lie to me, you know what you’re doing. I will never be the same. Now, I don’t believe in divorce. He gonna have to divorce me if we ever got a divorce.” (38:51, Sarah)
- Reasons for Cheating: Mandii posits that cheating may sometimes be driven by a desire for power, especially among men who feel emasculated.
- “If cheating made you feel powerful, I wonder how much power it gives a man to cheat...” (44:05, Mandii)
7. Gender, Friendship, and Boundaries
- Men & Women as ‘Just Friends’: Contentious debate arises about whether men and women can maintain platonic friendships while in a committed relationship or marriage.
- “Of the opposite sex? No.” (66:02, Sarah)
- “I have a reflection on the person I’m dating that they could assume that opposite sex is nothing besides trouble to me. Like, that’s your insecurity.” (68:23, Weezy)
- Intimacy Outside Romantic Partnerships: Sarah and Weezy discuss where emotional intimacy should be drawn—Sarah insists close cross-gender friendships are inappropriate; Weezy reasserts her right to meaningful platonic relationships.
- “There are certain things that I think create intimacy, which is not always sexual, by the way, but intimacy. And I don’t think that we as women should be spreading our intimate things with men. I just don’t think that.” (74:17, Sarah)
- “To me, it is a bit inappropriate now. Have Andre and I ever shared a bed or a room? No, but I understand the intimacy that vacations are.” (71:05, Weezy)
- “Cheating happens way before the act of sex. It’s accessible... dropping on a rock, same spot, over time will split the rock.” (71:22, Sarah)
8. Self-Worth, Friendship, and Social Competition
- Relationships Among Women: The group reflects on the competitiveness and lack of solidarity among beautiful women, and the broader implications of validation and being “chosen.”
- “A lot of beautiful people... imagine how it must feel when she sits down... her beauty is the only thing.” (62:24, Weezy)
- “When I was fat, I used to bag all the ns ‘cause the girls in the room would be fine, but I come in and start making a n** laugh.” (63:07, Mandii)
- “Ever meet a bad bitch? Is she funny and cool? Damn, bitch, what the fuck? And you’re like, you’d be surprised.” (63:29, Mandii)
Notable Quotes & Moments
-
On engagement periods and wedding urgency:
“If you’re engaged for longer than two years, you probably ain’t gonna get married.”
— Sarah (14:51) -
On sex before marriage:
“Like, I’m not marrying somebody without knowing what that dick do.”
— Mandii (03:27) -
On cheating and power:
“I wonder if even knowing how you excelled during that relationship, financially and through business, if cheating for him was a power as well...”
— Mandii (44:05) -
On friendship across genders:
“Of the opposite sex? No.”
— Sarah (66:02)
“I have a reflection on the person I’m dating that they could assume that opposite sex is nothing besides trouble to me. Like, that’s your insecurity.”
— Weezy (68:23) -
On survival, trauma, and moving forward:
“I am grateful because I do also strongly feel like God has a way of keeping you where he wants you to be. And I know, like, I know, like, I know. I know we all have a calling on our life, but I know mine is big because he’s told me, like, I’m so 1000% crystal clear on that.”
— Sarah (35:45)
Important Timestamps
- 00:51 – Hosts Mandii & Weezy introduce Sarah Fontenot and the theme of the episode.
- 03:14 – Sarah reveals she didn’t have sex until marriage.
- 25:04–33:07 – Sarah recounts domestic violence with ex-fiancé; hosts reflect on trauma and self-worth.
- 38:51 – Sarah on integrity and her strict “no divorce” policy.
- 44:05 – Mandii discusses power and cheating.
- 49:03 – Debate about blame in infidelity and sex work.
- 65:00–73:00 – Extensive debate: Can men and women really be “just friends” when partnered?
- 74:39 – Sarah’s view: women shouldn’t share intimacy with men outside marriage.
- 80:37 – Episode concludes; tease for Part 2 focusing on the choice to wait until marriage for sex.
Episode Tone & Dynamics
The conversation is lively, candid, and often humorous, despite touching on serious and sometimes painful topics like abuse, cheating, and trauma. The hosts and guest regularly challenge each other, playfully push back, and inject their very real experiences, making space for both vulnerability and humor. The tone remains conversational, direct, and without taboos—true to the podcast’s intent of breaking old norms and offering unfiltered dialogue about love, sex, and relationships.
Next Episode Preview
The hosts tease a second part (Pt. 2) focusing more closely on Sarah’s decision to remain celibate until marriage, promising more deep dives and humor.
For listeners craving honest, no-holds-barred talk about love, self-worth, trauma, and evolving boundaries in relationships, this episode is a gold mine—equally engaging and thought-provoking, whether or not you’re partnered, married, or somewhere in between.