You've Got Decisions: Help! I'm Failing as a Bull!

Summary

Decisions, Decisions: "You've Got Decisions: Help! I'm Failing as a Bull!"

Hosts: Mandii B & WeezyWTF (aka Andy)
Release Date: November 5, 2025
Podcast Network: The Black Effect and iHeartPodcasts
Theme: Non-traditional relationships, honest sex talk, and the nitty-gritty of the "bull" role in consensual non-monogamy

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Episode Overview

In this candid, laughter-filled episode of "Decisions, Decisions" (a spinoff of "Horrible Decisions"), hosts Mandii B and WeezyWTF—joined by a recurring guest known as "Guy"—tackle listener stories and dilemmas around non-traditional relationships. The central story: Guy's ongoing struggles fulfilling the "bull" role for couples seeking a third in their bedroom fun. What follows is a raw, practical, and hilarious exploration of the challenges, miscommunications, and personal growth moments that come with navigating swingers’ culture in the digital age.

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1. Candid Host Banter: Relationships & Tea

[01:06–09:10]

• Location Reveal: Andy and Mandii are recording in Atlanta and joke about fans tracking their moves through social media.
• Relationship Updates: Mandii discusses the difficulty of public breakups versus private timelines, referencing the delay between her actual breakup and finally discussing it publicly.
  • Quote, Mandii B [02:01]: "So we broke up two months ago. Guys. Sorry that y'all weren't able to keep up on the day to day or the month to month or the week to week on what was in my—and who was in my heart. Like, let me live."
• Story Time: Andy shares a wild New York Fashion Week story involving an awkward encounter with an ex’s new girlfriend.
  • Quote, Andy [05:44]: "Well, I knew they broke up, and I felt for her because I know he's a piece of... And I don't know what he did, but I know he did something."

Memorable Moments:

• Andy and Mandii’s banter about not wanting to "ruin the night" and the etiquette of approaching an ex’s current partner in social settings.
• Mandii laughing over not being able to keep fans updated on every twist of her love life.

---

2. Listener Dilemma: The Bull Who Can’t Deliver

[09:40–28:55]

The Setup

• "Guy" joins to share his story about being a “bull” (a single man brought into couples’ sexual dynamics).
• He meets couples for play via Reddit, describing the verification process for safety (checking addresses on Zillow) [10:59–12:45].
  • Quote, Guy [12:25]: "In my experience, yes. Because there's something that people try to do, especially on Reddit, where they will... send you to an address that nobody's living in. And as soon as you get there they will cut the chat and... block you."

Scene Dynamics & Communication

• Guy details the communication (or lack thereof) that led to mismatched expectations with the couple.
• He’s clear about his rule: he don’t bring drinks, only weed. "If I'm going to your house, you’re hosting." [15:08–15:29]
  • Quote, Guy [15:24]: "Yes, but I bring weed. That is my thing. I don't bring drinks, and I don't like to drink."
• Mandii B empathizes with the desire for both men to "set the scene" for a woman—but recognizes it’s about comfort zones [15:53–16:22].

The Play-by-Play: The Night Unfolds

• Description of the couple (South Indian male, white female).
• Play session: smoking weed together, setting up the PS5 (which confused Guy), and the sexual action finally starting.
• "I was fucking for like three and a half [hours]." [21:52]
• Managing expectations—Guy tries to please without climaxing; physical challenges (cramping up, not being able to finish).
  • Quote, Guy [22:25]: "I pull out. I stretch back. I got the nastiest cramp in my abs. The nastiest cramp."
  • Quote, Guy [25:12]: "I've never... usually not coming is not a problem in a big sense like this, but it was the whole thing of here."

Mustard Cures for Cramps

• Surprising tip: mustard, pickle juice, or salt helps with cramps [23:29–24:02].
  • Quote, Guy [23:35]: "Mustard, pickle juice, salt. Those are the three things. If you got a cramp, you take those and you drink some water and massage it. Your cramp will go away."
  • Mandii cracks up, saying if someone asked for mustard mid-threesome, she’d think it was a murder plot.
• Despite efforts, Guy never finishes; hosts and guest laugh about the realities and pressures of being “the bull.”

Aftermath

• The couple he played with posts for another bull days later, making Guy question his performance and fulfillment in this role.

---

3. Deeper Dive: Can Guy Actually Enjoy Being a Bull?

[28:27–32:28]

Is This for You?

• The hosts challenge Guy: does he actually enjoy being a bull, or just the idea/validation?
  • Quote, Andy [29:34]: "You like pleasing. But when a couple's in there, yes, it is."
• Guy's take: He derives satisfaction from pleasuring the woman, but doesn’t care much about the sex act itself.
  • Quote, Guy [28:55]: "I realized at that point sex does not matter to me. The fact I was living off the fact that she was enjoying... was doing enough for me."

Communication Problems

• Mandii urges Guy to communicate his own needs and kinks (he’s a switch, likes being directed by the husband), rather than just accommodate others’ fantasies.
  • Quote, Mandy B [30:37]: "You should be able—if it's a deal breaker, I would say that's the thing. That's not the couple for you that would come."
• Guy admits he often holds back out of fear of rejection or being left on read:
  • Quote, Guy [30:24]: "No, only because I know that can be a deal breaker for people, but."

---

4. Navigating the Lifestyle: Sites, Safety & Satisfaction

[32:28–36:21]

Reddit vs. Field vs. FetLife

• Reddit is hit or miss—often anonymously driven, with lots of flakiness and people only seeking “sexting.”
• Mandii and Andy recommend platforms like Field and FetLife for a more communicative, serious, and vettable pool of couples.
  • Quote, Andy [34:22]: "You’re going to end up having a better recipient on the other end. They’re going to be more experienced when it comes to these things to language... Yes, it might be work but you gonna have better sex and then people will start respecting your needs..."

Hard Truths About Compatibility

• If your needs don’t align, be ready to walk away before things get awkward or unfulfilling.
  • Quote, Mandy B [37:08]: "If you feel like you can't show up for how a couple wants you to show up, your immediate fear... needs to be okay. Because you don't need to be in a place where you're wasting your time and wasting theirs..."

Communication & Boundaries

• Older, more experienced couples tend to communicate better and make the experience more enjoyable.
• Guy reflects that better upfront clarity about desires, roles, and boundaries is essential for fulfilling play.

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5. Closing Insights & Takeaways

[36:21–38:18]

Resonant Lessons:

• Know what you want, communicate early, and be comfortable with (self-)rejection for the right fit.
• The “bull” role isn’t just about stamina—it’s about honest connection, knowing your kinks, and clear boundaries.

Memorable Closing Quote:

• Guy [37:13]: "It's not only be okay with being rejected by them, but rejecting yourself from the situation. They're no longer in it. Okay, yes, I can."

Resource Reminder

• For more stories, check out the August 27th Town Hall on Patreon for a much wilder (and explicit) story from Guy.

---

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• [02:01] Mandii B: "So we broke up two months ago. Guys. Sorry that y' all weren't able to keep up on the day to day or the month to month or the week to week on what was in my and who was in my heart. Like, let me live."
• [15:24] Guy: "Yes, but I bring weed. That is my thing. I don't bring drinks, and I don't like to drink."
• [23:35] Guy: "Mustard, pickle juice, salt. Those are the three things. If you got a cramp, you take those and you drink some water and massage it. Your cramp will go away."
• [28:55] Guy: "I realized at that point sex does not matter to me. The fact I was living off the fact that she was enjoying... was doing enough for me."
• [30:37] Mandy B: "You should be able—if it's a deal breaker, I would say that's the thing. That's not the couple for you that would come."
• [34:22] Andy: "You’re going to end up having a better recipient on the other end. They’re going to be more experienced when it comes to these things to language..."

---

Final Thoughts

This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in non-traditional relationships, looking for practical advice (and real talk) about swinging, or simply craving an honest, hilarious window into the realities behind racy Reddit threads. The hosts’ sharp insight, compassionate roasting, and lived experience make this conversation both educational and wildly entertaining.

Catch "You've Got Decisions" every Wednesday for more spicy stories and open-hearted advice!

Transcript

[Andy]

This is an iHeart podcast.

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[Mandy B]

Welcome everybody, to another episode of Horrible. This is yours. I'm your girl, Mandy B, aka Peg the Stallion, aka Peggy Bundy, aka Megan Markle, aka that bitch.

[Andy]

Hi everybody. We are in Atlanta. I kind of like to start telling people where we at when we start recording. I think that'll be fun.

[Mandy B]

I'm fine with that. Even though they be clocking our Instagram, so they gonna be like, damn this Recorded this about three months ago.

[Andy]

Honestly, it only sucks if there's a breakup.

[Mandy B]

You know what? I think that was my thing about this year. I was in a relationship for two months longer than I really was in a relationship publicly. And that kind of sucked because then when I finally got to the Breakfast.

[Andy]

Club launched that you.

[Mandy B]

Breakfast Club launched it. But when I finally got to like explaining like what I was, it was.

[Andy]

Like, whoa, what happened to your?

[Mandy B]

And it was like, so we broke up two months ago. Guys. Sorry that y' all weren't able to keep up on the day to day or the month to month or the week to week on what was in my and who was in my heart. Like, let me live.

[Andy]

Actually, the only thing I did, I did. I just didn't want to talk about it until I was ready to talk because it's like, I have to process my.

[Mandy B]

Tea, bitch. What is the.

[Andy]

Oh, bitch, this tea.

[Mandy B]

So hold on, let me make sure we can stop it right here. No, bitch, don't you go give them the tea because you know, this is what they get when they get to hear the beginning of an episode, I.

[Andy]

Tell you a little bit.

[Mandy B]

Okay, tell us a little bit.

[Andy]

Extend.

[Mandy B]

Extend the story a little bit to where you have to cut it off and tell people to come subscribe to Patreon.

[Andy]

Okay, now what I will tell you is I'm going to tell you the crazy tea when we stop, because I respect this girl, and I'm not going.

[Mandy B]

Okay, you respect her, but you still gonna tell her to you to them, bitch.

[Andy]

No, no, no. This part should. She'll be straight.

[Mandy B]

I ask her. Okay, okay, okay.

[Andy]

So New York Fashion Week comes. Okay, I go to the Purple Party. My boy Andre Power hosted. Sean Dickerson.

[Mandy B]

I go there every year.

[Andy]

Sorry about this year. Was playing.

[Mandy B]

Yeah. Shout Out. So there's a bus. I saw the. I saw the pictures. Oh, this is the bus. That llama was like. I want to know the. When we recorded in New York after Fashion Week, he was like, wait, wait, wait, Weezy. I want to know the Fashion Week tv.

[Andy]

He got on the bus.

[Mandy B]

Is this the bus that he didn't get on?

[Andy]

So I get on the bus.

[Mandy B]

Okay, there's a.

[Andy]

Wait, explain this.

[Mandy B]

For people who haven't gone to New.

[Andy]

York Fashion Week, okay? New York Fashion Week parties everywhere. This is a block party that was on Howard and Lafayette. Yep. That's what made me think to eat a little Mercerie that night. Purple is a clothing brand, and honestly, I had way too much fun. New York Fashion Week. I keep saying this. I'm a podcaster. It clearly must be dead. I got invited to way too much. One of the parties I got invited to, I said, oh, the. The list is going downhill at $5. But purple is really cool because it's not a super exclusive one you can pull up. It's on.

[Mandy B]

Well. And it's a urban brand, but what's.

[Andy]

Cool about this is it's a block party. So the bus is the VIPs. Okay, whatever. Mand this loaded. I'm trying to say this in a way that is respecting her because it was a moment. Okay?

[Mandy B]

We wait, we listen, and we do judge.

[Andy]

Just make it that I have nothing to judge this girl for.

[Mandy B]

But I get on the bus, okay?

[Andy]

The bus is small at the top. Andre's DJing me, and my man brought him some coffee because he was flying in from somewhere else the night before. I see Sean Dickerson every time I'm flying.

[Mandy B]

Shout out to Sean. That's White boy I like now.

[Andy]

Who is Sean talking to?

[Mandy B]

Who is Sean talking to, Josie? Because I saw Jazzy Was out there too.

[Andy]

Oh, fine.

[Mandy B]

Yeah. I thought you was all over her. I was like, girl, calm down.

[Andy]

I was like, you know, they have the kick of looking at my in the eye. We be dancing anyway. Talking to old Bay's current girlfriend.

[Mandy B]

No, wait. Well, remember, how do you. I was about to say, how do you know this is his current girlfriend?

[Andy]

Of course I know. She looks like they were together two years. Okay, so.

[Mandy B]

Oh, wait, the. That he dated after you he was with for two years?

[Andy]

Yes.

[Mandy B]

Okay. Okay.

[Andy]

So I tapped my. I said, oh. He's like, oh, wow. So there was a small part of me that wanted me to say something to her, and I think it's because I just saw him. But I. I felt this inkling to speak to her, and I said, you know what? Let me not ruin the night.

[Mandy B]

Yeah, what inkling you had? What was he gonna say to her?

[Andy]

Well, I knew they broke up, and I felt for her because I know he's a piece of. And I don't know what he did, but I know he did something.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Andy]

Hour and a half goes by. For the first time in my life.

[Mandy B]

That's a long time.

[Andy]

I have a. I was partying hard, bro. Okay, I'll include some photos for y'. All. Partying hard. I don't know what canned cocktail I was drinking, but I was lit. It wasn't cut water. It was high noon something. I'm lit now they playing dead. I see, you know, the Ava piano. It hits. It hits. Okay. And then I feel attacked on my back. And she says, hey, can I talk to you for a second, Tom? Like, this bitch lucky I ain't doing bomb. I was like, no. I said, are we. I don't know if I said this, but in my brain, I'm like, are we good? Like, sure.

[Mandy B]

Because you ain't know if she wanted, like, smoke, right?

[Andy]

Because I could talk.

[Mandy B]

I can hold you. I can hold you. That's what mama. What you mean, can we talk? Is we good or not?

[Andy]

Right?

[Mandy B]

For me, it's like, it. If A want to talk to me, especially about a. And we know we got A in common.

[Andy]

How.

[Mandy B]

What. What's the energy you're bringing to me? Because you're not gonna ruin my life.

[Andy]

It was just very, like, neutral. But it's like.

[Mandy B]

It'd be neutral first. And then, right?

[Andy]

So my next to me, he's looking at me like, oh, right. So let me just tell y' all the phases of the conversation. First that he saw afterward. I think I talked to her 30 minutes.

[Mandy B]

That's way too long during a party.

[Andy]

Maybe it was only 20, but it was intense. So I go up to him to apologize to him, because I realized I left him so long. So after the thing happened, which I'll tell y' all about, I go up to him. I said, damn, baby, I'm so sorry. He's like, no, you're good. Let's get off the bus. Let's. Let's go. Like, I thought he had attitude. He's like, let's just go. I'm like, are you mad? He's like, no, I want to hear what happened. This was. I'm trying to hear what happened. He know who she is. He said, yo, you started standing up. Then you had your hands on your shoulders. Then you were sitting down. Did I see you crying?

[Mandy B]

What the fuck?

[Andy]

Like, let's go talk.

[Mandy B]

Oh, you went through, like, the four phases of grief in front of him. What the fuck y' all was talking about?

[Andy]

So she starts off by saying, okay, I read book, not the book. And she said, I knew nothing about him. I thought I knew him. I knew nothing. She said, he told me other women were your idea. He told me he didn't want to do xyz. He told me he wasn't even in a serious relationship with you. I'm like, what? So I said to her, respectfully, how could you believe that if you know? She's like, well, I realize now maybe he said that because I've been talking about this nigga. She's like, he just maybe wanted me to think he wasn't that close to you. In. In my brain. I'm like, dog, if she would have known this was my nigga, she would have just clicked on Horrible and heard everything.

[Mandy B]

Wait, wait, wait. He made it seem like y' all weren't that serious. So in her mind, she, like, didn't think that you were, bro. There's like, an archive of three years of information about you.

[Andy]

Listen to a nigga if they. Like, I wouldn't really hear like that. Okay, like, whatever. You're just gonna maybe blah.

[Mandy B]

You just got a little taste of the horrible decisions Patreon. But why is that there? Tap in for the full, uncut, and way nastier episodes over on patreon. Go to patreon.com horribledecisions and unlock all the messy tea, wild stories and bonus content you won't hear anywhere else. And now here's yous've Got Decisions.

[Andy]

If you would like to have us answer your questions. If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, Or a terrible thruffle. Guess what?

[Mandy B]

You've got decisions.

[Andy]

Happy hump day, everybody. Welcome back for another ygd. This is a special edition of a live ygd. We are starting this episode off with Guy. You'll hear a third voice from Andy and I, and the reason we're doing this is honestly, you inspired this guy. The story was so damn good on our Patreon Town Hall. Horrible decisions are still over there. Did I see. You know what? What if we got everybody's seat and you were one of the first people that wrote us, so what is going on with your ass?

[Guy]

All right, y'. All. So I started. I talked to another couple. I was talking to him back in September. Everything was moving smoothly. And then it gets to. He asked, when was the last time you came? I said, like, three days ago. He said, ooh, he's looking for somebody who hasn't come in weeks. She wants to get filled up. I said, okay, okay, wait, wait, wait.

[Andy]

We need a little backstory for the people that never have heard you. Where did you meet this couple? What role are you playing with them? How does all this come about for you?

[Guy]

Okay, so I. I use Reddit. I'm gonna say right here. I use Reddit to be a bull and engage with lifestyle couples. It is something that I enjoy. I don't like getting paid for it. I do it solely because I enjoy giving other people pleasure and helping them achieve what they want to achieve. This specific couple, I saw them post. I said, shoot. Let me send a little message. They had pictures of the girl on there. Shoot him a message. The next day, he hits me back. He said, all right, cool. Let's talk more. Let's swap pics. We start talking. Then the whole, when was the last time you came? I said, two, three days. I said, she wants weeks. Month later, I see them post again. I hit him back up. I said, you still looking? I haven't come in a week and a half. Let's see if we can get something going. He said, cool. We send a verifying pic where? Of my username. Their username written on a piece of paper and a picture of my chest. He says, bet sends me his phone number. I get his phone number. I text on there immediately. Things are moving smoothly. He sends me his address. Now, I gotta be careful when people send address. So I check on Zillow to see if that house is actually lived in. It's lived in. I said, wait, wait, wait.

[Andy]

Is that how people should be verified?

[Guy]

In my experience, yes. Because there's something that people try to do, especially on Reddit where they will they will put posts out there with fake pictures and then you reply and they'll send you to an address that nobody's living in. And as soon as you get there they will cut the chat and they will stop responding. They will block you.

[Andy]

Wow.

[Guy]

Sitting there. It has happened to me one time and from that point I will be absolutely careful every other time. They will verify, I will verify and it's cool.

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[Andy]

Oh, okay, okay. So you check on Zillow to verify before you're going over there. That's your safety precaution. Okay?

[Guy]

Yes. So I make sure it is. It is lived in. I look through the pictures, I'm like, all right, if I walk in there, will I be able to get out quick so we don't end up meeting for another five days. So now it's a Wednesday. They said, hey, come through. So it's 10pm I get over there. On the way there, he's like, hey, can you pick up some drinks? Yada yada, yada. I said absolutely not. Absolutely not.

[Mandy B]

Why was that an absolutely not? Why would you not want to set the scene for me?

[Guy]

If I'm going to your house, your hosting.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Guy]

Yes. Don't ask me to pay for something to join your.

[Andy]

I'm already doing the dick.

[Guy]

Yes, but I bring weed. That is my thing. I don't bring drinks, and I don't like to drink.

[Mandy B]

Bring in something.

[Guy]

Yes, but you shouldn't asking me to go out of my way and pay.

[Andy]

He.

[Guy]

He did a good thing by saying, if it's on the way, can I ask it?

[Mandy B]

Is that just a rule for you?

[Guy]

Because to me, that's just a rule for me.

[Mandy B]

Okay. Because if I'm a woman and I'm about to have two men, I would like that both men cater to the scene.

[Guy]

Absolutely.

[Andy]

Well, he's catering. Well, he's the third, technically.

[Mandy B]

I mean, I guess to the couple. Yes. But as a woman, that's where I'm putting myself in the woman scenario, as I, you know, like, I would like to know that both men cared for me as the woman to set the scene as well. Not that you're coming to please me and my partner, but just as a woman, if I'm doing the psychology jump ropes of being with two men, I guess that's where I would like both men to want to cater to the scene.

[Andy]

That's all. Yes.

[Mandy B]

Okay. Okay, continue. But you bring the weed. You just don't want to bring the drinks. So you're still kind of adding to the scene in whatever makes you feel comfortable. Got it?

[Guy]

Yes. So I bring weed because that is my thing. I don't like to drink. And if they were drinking, that's fine. I get there, we open the door, we meet. It's a super tall brown guy, like, South Indian dude. Was not expecting that. Didn't expect him to be that tall. He was a good six, three. I'm not over six foot.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Guy]

He's a little bit shorter. Just like. Okay. And it's a white girl. So it's a mixed couple. I walk in there, they have drinks already on the table. I'm just like. And it's. They have cups out. It looks like they've already drank. As somebody who's walking into your house, I'm not going to ask for none of your stuff. So we're just standing there for a second, then I say, all right, y' all want to go smoke? We go outside, finish smoking, get back inside immediately, sit on the couch. I go use the bathroom. I come back, they're setting up the PS5. And I'm just like, are we about to play a game? And I'm upset because I'm sitting there because I'm just like, why are you prolonging this? Because it's. You said you wanted to get straight to it in the whole. In the messages. He didn't give a lot of information, but he said that. We get in there, I'm sitting on the couch. I sit right next to her. He sits on the far side. At this point, I think he's a cuck because they're asking for somebody more dominant. I sit there, I tap her leg. I say, how are you doing? How are you feeling? He says, I'm good. Then starts rubbing up on me. So I'm. So I'm saying, we're just trying to get going, right? He starts sucking. She starts sucking my dick. He's just sitting there watching the TV and just glancing over at us. I'm just like, all right, cool. I start eating her out. Then I go put her in Mission. Not missionary, doggy on the couch. And then she yells to him. Well, not even a yell. It was a snap. She said, take that off. And he just starts pulling his pants off. I'm just like, okay. Then she starts sucking his dick while I'm fucking him, while I'm fucking her. I start getting tired because I'm going for a good 30 minutes on the couch. And I said, all right, hop on, thinking she is going to hop on top, start riding. She lays on her side, starts sucking my dick. And he does the weakest strokes inside of her, just small and short. I'm just like, okay. Then she's acting all dainty and she says, can I ride you? And I said, okay, cool. Then they start leading me into the bedroom, laying on the bed. She starts riding. That goes on for a good 10 minutes. Then out of nowhere, he says, you wanna pull out the straps? I said, okay, but he was talking to her. He says, okay. Then he starts reaching under the bed while she's still riding me. And then we transition. And he had these. You know those cuffs where you're strapped to the bed, four corners, wrists and ankles? Pulls that out. We both set her up in that. Then I keep fucking her like that. He's just laying on the top, laying on there by the head post, by her head. He's just watching and he's just talking. He's just like, hey, get wet. Look at how she's accepting that. Yada, yada, yada, yada. Yada yada.

[Andy]

Keeps talking to you.

[Guy]

Talking to me.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Guy]

I'm just like, okay. Then she says, can I come asking him? So I'm just like, hold on, hold on, hold on. I thought it was a cuck hot wife situation. That what she said right there just changed it to a stag vixen situation.

[Andy]

Now we need to know what is cuck hot wife. What's stag vixen?

[Guy]

Okay. Cuck hot wife is where stag vixen and cuck hot wife are basically in the same. In this specific aspect where the male goes out and finds another, Finds a bull to engage with their person. In the cuck scenario, the cuck doesn't really participate. He is. Usually there's some sort of humiliation factor. That's what I was getting from the whole take your pants off in the beginning.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Guy]

As soon as she says, can I come to him? That's where I'm like, oh, this is a stag vixen. Because the stag is taking a more active role in the whole process. And it's not really about the humiliation. It's also about him. Oh, it may not even be that. It might they have a dom sub pre existing relationship. That's what I was trying to deduce in the moment. And because we smoked, I'm focusing on all the mechanics of the situation rather than the actual motion of the situation.

[Andy]

Okay.

[Guy]

And so I see that's where I kind of messed up. I think that is one of my three mistakes on why it didn't go well.

[Andy]

This sounds like it's going well.

[Guy]

It does, doesn't it? That's what I thought. So it keeps going. I've gone on for like 45 minutes. Then he taps me out, he starts fucking her. Then he comes and I immediately go back in there while he's fucking her. She's sucking my dick and she's like pulling me into like choker with her, I think. So I'm just like, okay, trying to get that dominance factor. He comes, I come in, I keep going. And this goes on for a total of like two hours until the next bad part happens. You pull out.

[Mandy B]

I was fucking for two hours.

[Guy]

I was fucking for like three and a half.

[Mandy B]

Okay.

[Guy]

And I would take what is in the weed. No, no, no, no. I take. So if you guys remember from the. The town hall story, I couldn't get it up right. This time I came ready. I had the Bluetooth before on the drive. It was 30 minute drive, not an ad.

[Mandy B]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Guy]

Okay.

[Andy]

Now I can three and a half.

[Mandy B]

So you took the BL to be sure that you could stay hard.

[Guy]

Yes.

[Mandy B]

You are now two and a half hours in.

[Guy]

Yes.

[Mandy B]

What's happening now that makes it go wrong?

[Guy]

So I pull out. So every 30, 40 minutes, I will pull out, start eating her pussy, fingering her. Because I would get tired. I needed to give my leg some time to regain whatever sensibility. Drink some water. Give her some water, right. But keep eating her pussy, fingering her to make sure she's still getting something and it's not just dead. I pull out. I stretch back. I got the nastiest cramp in my abs. The nastiest cramp. So I'm sticking four fingers and massaging it down the middle. Drinking water while they're just cuddling up at the bed. Because I'm just like, maybe I can get this to go away. Drank all of my water and look in my bag. No mustard packet. So I say just like this to them. I say, y' all got mustard? Because I'm still high as hell mustard. Why? Because I have a cramp. They're like, oh, what you need mustard for? I said, I. And I say it just like this. I said, I just called the nastiest cramp in my ass.

[Mandy B]

Wait, wait, wait. Is this some old folk shit that I don't know?

[Andy]

Wait.

[Mandy B]

Mustard helps with cramps.

[Guy]

Mustard, pickle juice, salt. Those are the three things. If you got a cramp, you take those and you drink some water and massage it. Your cramp will go away.

[Mandy B]

Mustard, pickle juice, or salt. Or salt. Okay, nigga.

[Andy]

If someone came to me and my partner and said, can I get some mustard? I'd be always going to drip us in mustard and kill us.

[Guy]

Right? So they were like. She's like, no, no, we don't have mustard. Is there anything else? I said, y' all got pickle juice? No, no, we don't have that. I should have known. I should have known they didn't have that. And I rolled my eyes in my head, and I'm just like, do y' all have salt? He leaves. She's just, like, rubbing my leg, yada, yada, yada. He goes in, grabs a salt shaker, pour it on my hand. I lick it, pour some more on my hand, lick it, drink some water, massage. Cramp goes away, instantly back in it. So now it is like 1am I started some more. It's 1am and they're like, I still have not come in. And the. And remember, the big thing in the beginning was she wants to get filled up. She wants to get cream pied. He is a teacher. She had to get up in 5 hours and so I had to get up at 6 o'. Clock. So 5 hours as well. I'm just thinking, I cannot stay here and stay the course until I come. I cannot do that.

[Mandy B]

Guy based guy. You're at this point, this is two stories. Well where you fell short my guy.

[Guy]

Yeah, yeah. I've never. Usually not coming is not a problem in a big sense like this, but it was the whole thing of here. So I start. So she's like, all right, I want you to come. He's saying, I want you to fill her up. Fill her up deep. And so I'm about to come and it's a missionary and I'm doing the longest strokes to get the most sensation for myself. And then he proceeds to start trying to make out with me. And she bites the fuck out of my chin. No, no. Blood doesn't break skin. And I lose it instantly. I'm just like crap. And then I have to do the Old Faithful. I start breathing heavy. You fake it and I just. You can't slide out.

[Andy]

See it.

[Guy]

But this is what I say. I say, fuck. Say just like that, how the fuck am I orgasm but not fucking coming? It was the high brain. It was the high brain that made me say it. But it made so much sense. I'm just like, okay, this is how I'm gonna do it.

[Andy]

And then.

[Guy]

And I just. And then I. I'm at the edge of the bed, they're still cuddling and we're there for like maybe five more minutes because they're thinking maybe he's just gonna come back up and do it again. And I think to myself, all right, I'm leave. And I walked myself out. Next day, he says, hope you enjoyed her pussy. She was very sore. She appreciated that. Yada yada yada. I respond. He leaves me undelivered the next day. So it's two days later, a Friday. Another post on Reddit looking for another bull. And I'm just like, ain't no.

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[Mandy B]

Guy do you need to be like, do you desire to be a bull? Or is this something you're just practicing? And I only ask that because, yeah, in both instances where you're a bull, you didn't deliver on One time you couldn't get hard and on this time you couldn't come. So are you actually enjoying this or do you just like being in the midst of it? Like psychologically, are you enjoying this?

[Guy]

Yeah. So at the end, once all of that was happening with the whole Reddit thing, I had to sit there and be like, do I actually enjoy doing this? I realized at that point sex does not matter to me. The fact I was living off the fact that she was enjoying that she was coming however many he said eight or nine times. It was definitely more than that because I was counting my head and that in and of itself was doing enough for me.

[Andy]

So you really like the actual act of and it's couple related. You like pleasing. But when a couple's in there, yes, it is.

[Guy]

I like that. I like in my the brain. My fantasy with couples is because I'm a switch. I am a switch. If I'm fucking the wife, I would love it. If the husband is like, do this, do that, do this, do that. Like directing the whole thing. Like that is the kink that I have my biggest kink. I've never found a couple who can actually do that.

[Mandy B]

Do you communicate this to the couples that are interested in you coming in to fulfill their fantasy? Are you not sharing what actually pleases you with them?

[Guy]

A big thing that pleases me is giving oral. That is something that I always communicate up front.

[Mandy B]

You're not communicating, you're not Communicating that you want to be told what to do by the cuck?

[Guy]

No, only because I know that can be a deal breaker for people, but.

[Mandy B]

You should be able. If it's a deal breaker, I would say that's the thing. That's not the couple for you that would come.

[Andy]

That would get you to like get your kink at the end of the bargain. Now, granted, I know in many scenarios with doms coming isn't part of what they're doing. And to me this is kind of DOM sub role because you're coming in with someone's partner, they're watching, etc. There's a little bit of DOM in here.

[Guy]

Right, Right.

[Andy]

I'm wondering, have you ever posted an ad that specifically said your fantasy and had the couples hit you?

[Guy]

On occasion, yes. But when on Reddit, it is very hard. It is very hard as a single male to attract a couple. It's very difficult. What about Field? I've tried Field, but it's so much work required in doing it that it. In the times that I've opened the app and started doing it, then I'm just like, this is not to my liking. This interface just bothers me.

[Mandy B]

The interface can bother you, but even you saying it's a lot of work, to me, you are showing up though, but not pleasing couples because you're not being right in the things that turn you on in order for you to perform. So, yeah, Field may seem like a lot more work because it's people able to communicate what they want. But if you're entering this lifestyle, guy, I would say that you need to be upfront because you're wasting these couples time. That's what you're like. And then for you to go online and see that the same couple is looking for someone else, you're also kind of feeling away about that. But I think that, I think that you need to be able to communicate what you want out of the dynamic the same way as the couple. And if for whatever reason you can't or you feel like it'll be a deal breaker for them, that just might not be the couple for you.

[Guy]

Right. I will add in this specific situation, usually I have broader and bigger communication with older couples. Like couples 30s or older, they're more open to communication, expressing kinks than what they like. And in those situations, yes, I do talk about my director, King, in this specific situation, they were a young couple and they were not giving a lot of that communication on what they were asking for. Like in the beginning when we were texting the most I could get from him to say was, you can slap her ass. Not too hard, just make a sound. Don't kiss her, let her kiss you. I don't care if it happens or not. He likes to come, she likes to be eaten out, she likes doggy. Those are the only things I got. Even that the pushing and prodding to get more often led to me being left undelivered. And I think it was also me just wanting to break into it and see if first experience we can regroup afterward and then talk more. That is not how this one ended up going. So I completely agree with you.

[Andy]

You're actually having an issue because of Reddit.

[Guy]

Yes.

[Andy]

So the thing about Reddit is a lot of people are using you for the sexting aspect.

[Guy]

Right.

[Andy]

A lot of people are wanting to have this interaction, get more pictures, but it never goes to fruition, just like the Zillow thing that you have going on. Whereas when you've got FetLife Field, you have someone's profile, once your face is out there, there's a little bit more to it. Right. I think if you're going to actually act as a unicorn to couples as, as a, as a bull. Isn't that what it's called? Like, I think if you go through with this, you can't be on sites that are already anonymous, Right. You're not going to get the experience because the experienced people, the better looking people, they're most likely not going to be on the threads. They're going to be on something where they can curate it.

[Guy]

Right.

[Andy]

And you're going to end up having a better like recipient on the other end. They're going to be more experienced when it comes to these things to language. Think about even the way that when you're on field you can click a bunch of different kinks that's like already built into the app. Yes, it might be work but you gonna have better sex and then people will start respecting your needs when you're in the middle of trying to get to know them. When you're in the middle of sex. I mean I've had a lot of sex on field and by a lot. I don't know how much that is, but I'd say I've used it on and off since like 2018 and I haven't had a bad experience. Like there was never anyone terrible, maybe a bad day or we awkward sex but like at the end of the day they kind of get it.

[Guy]

Yes.

[Andy]

And I think that if you're going to be coming in as someone that is experienced with couples, you need couples that are experienced too because it also muddies your own experience.

[Guy]

Yes, I completely agree. If actually there is no rebuttal to that that personal. I mean there really is. I fully agree with you because I've come to the same conclusion. It's just I have to sit here and be like there is only so much energy that I want to allot to do to put into it. That's so for this specific couple, I was not giving it to them because they weren't giving it back. The moment that I talk to more experienced couples, we do have that more personal. It's not just the sexting thing, but we do eventually move to telegram. And it's not all about the photo exchange. It's all about what are your boundaries, what are your hard nos, what is something that, that you want to have thing. What is something you don't want to happen? Oh, do you want me to engage with you as the cuck, as the stag? Did I speak to you? Should I not speak to you? But I only speak to her.

[Andy]

And if you want to start having good sex like those things that you know how to do, you need a partner that's going to be doing the same. You can't be the only one coming in with good dick and good communication.

[Mandy B]

Agreed. And then I guess last a bit of if I for you would be. And I talk about this in our book no holds barred, you have to be okay with rejection. If you feel like you can't show up for how a couple wants you to show up, your immediate fear going to they're going to leave me on red or they're not going to be interested or they're going to go on to the next needs to be okay. Because you don't need to be in a place where you're wasting your time and wasting theirs. Where after the experience you say, well, this is where it went wrong. This is where it went wrong. This is where it went wrong. And it wasn't a great experience because you know you left them unpleased and essentially you were too. So you just need to know what you want and how to communicate that. And when a couple isn't on the same page as you, be okay with not playing with them.

[Guy]

Right?

[Andy]

Not even pulling up because you know you got to play with your own orgasm, right?

[Guy]

And for me to synthesize what you're saying, it's not only be okay with being rejected by them, but rejecting yourself from the situation. They're no longer in it. Okay, yes, I can.

[Andy]

Yes, great way to say it. I actually want to go and just give the date. If you guys want to hear more of Guy and the crazy ass story he told us with sound bites included on what he was saying in bed and everything. It was from our town hall in August. August 27th. August 26th. Please go and check patreon.com Horrible decisions. Go on there. It's audio only, but it is sonically fucking amazing. Guy, thank you for giving us all your juicy tips.

[Guy]

Of course. You've done it for years.

[Mandy B]

I love it. I love it. And again, thank you guys so much. Make sure you check out. You got decisions every Wednesday right here wherever you listen to audio podcasts. And you can catch the full video over on patreon [e-mail] backslash Horrible decision.

[Andy]

Hi.

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[Andy]

This is an iHeart podcast.