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This is an I Heart podcast. Guaranteed human.
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This is wheezy WTF from Decisions decisions ladies. Let's talk about taking control of our sexual health. That's grown woman energy. You may think HIV affects someone else somewhere else, but the truth is it's impacting our community and some of us are being hit harder than others. Black women make up just 13% of the women in the US yet account for nearly half of new HIV diagnoses amongst women. Taking care of ourselves is community care. Know your options, ask questions and protect your peace and your body. That's using your power. Sponsored by Care for the Culture from Gilead Sciences this April get your rom
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com on with you, Me and Tuscany. Only in theaters this Friday. From Will Packer, producer of Girls Trip, you, you, Me and Tuscany has all the ingredients of your favorite rom coms heart, huge laughs and sizzling chemistry. Starring Halle Bailey and Reggae Jean Page and set in the enchanting vineyards of Tuscany, this film is a movie escape we've been waiting for. It's the perfect film for date night or girls night. Don't miss Universal Pictures. You, Me and Tuscany. Directed by Cat Cuero. Only in theaters this early Friday. Rated PG13 may be inappropriate for children under 13.
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March is the month when we finally move past the reset phase and actually make things happen. So let's do this. If you've been dreaming about starting your own business, Shopify makes it easy. Already running a business? Trust me, Shopify can handle it all and it grows with you. That's why I moved my stores over there when we decided to put browngirlgrinding.com on Shopify and sell our merch and update you guys on the news. And it was so easy. I never doubted that the website would work because of how easy it was to set up. No matter how big or small your business is, Shopify helps you keep the momentum going this month. And that's what March is all about. It's time for you to invest in your own business, not someone else's for a change. Head on over to shopify.com backslash Ben and see what it feels like to be the one in control of your future.
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Pressure has a way of revealing what remains steady. In the latest Nissan campaign, the Nissan Rogue was tested to the extreme to demonstrate that it's built to last to durability and reliability challenges inspired by real tests conducted by Nissan engineers. Brutal potholes, a steady force of water, even a jet powered sandstorm. Each challenge inviting a deeper look at how quality durability and reliability hold their Ground in real world conditions. Every test was 100% real.
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No CG, no AI.
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To see how the Rogue held up, visit nissan-duordability.com
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if you would like to have us answer your questions. If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible thruffle, guess what?
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You've got decisions. Y' all pussy assholes got decisions. And y' all be making the wrong one. So here we are for another motherfucker.
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And our friends do, too, y', all, because we really.
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It.
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It was almost too. It was some. Listen, we both going through it. When it comes to friends, you know,
C
I feel like it's your fault. You started the. We listen and we judge. And I brought up in therapy today how I don't feel right at how judgy I am to all of my friends right now, because what the fuck are you bitches doing? Yes, I feel bad for judging all my friends and their circumstances.
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You want to know how I knew things were going okay for me in life? I talked to my therapist last week, and I was talking shit about a friend for about 30 minutes, and he was real funny, too. He was like, a mess. And then what she was doing at one point, I was like, am I paying this nigga?
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. I ain't even gonna hold you. It's like I'm just in one of those spaces where it's like, can I enjoy my life? I made good decisions in life, and I feel like I can't even celebrate or have a good time because all you bitches made terrible decisions with your pussy, with your money, with. With. With your job choices, with everything in life. And now I feel like I have to sit here and support you or,
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you know, what's happened.
C
It's heavy, bro.
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We're in the age of the Internet, and we're in the age of the highlight reel. And so to me, all of my Instagram posts or whatever, like, all of them are kind of in line with my friends. We all go out for sushi on girls night, post a cute fit, post a vacation pic, once in a blue and whatever, or a taking us out, but only one of us isn't lying. And, yeah, my. My life hasn't really changed on Instagram from when I was broke. And I think what you have experienced that I've experiencing, we're having the same kind of day right now is friends taking advantage of us. I'm the Nick.
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Yeah, Yeah. I was just saying it's funny because, like, I was on the phone with my boo, and he was like, you know, like the saying that it's lonely at the top. People think that has to do with, like, fame and celebrity and all this, but it's to a point right now where, because I'm just financially secure, my friends don't check on me because. Because I have money. They just feel like I'm fine. And so, like, for the things in my life to be happening that my friends know of, because it's in tandem with my other friends, it's like no one is even checking on me. And it's like, it's because they still see me working and they just assume that I'm fine. Everyone just assumes I'm fucking fine. And it's just like, damn. Cause I could pay my rent. I'm fine. No. And I get, like, that there's levels to this shit, but, like, check on me as a fucking human, bro.
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Like, I think it also has to do with us feeling like, as two people that have been broke before. I think it has to do with knowing that financial stress is the worst. And it's hard to. It's like watching, you know, we're saying we're financially secure, which we are. But I'm also the person that goes online and talks about Jeff Bezos. Now, we are not close to Jeff Bezos. Right. And so the.
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No, but I'd like to be.
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I'd like to be 1% of his.
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I'd like to be.
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But the point of that, right, is people are looking, like, how bad could it really be? Like, there's a reason we don't like to watch the Kardashians cry. Because, like, bitch, shut the fuck up.
C
You're rich.
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What if in our world there really is a thing of someone thinking like that maybe I have posted on Instagram.
C
Oh, you know. No, no, no. I feel like. Yeah, Art even, like. And I talked about it on, I think, selective ignorance, how terrible everyone sounded when those fires were happening in California and it was impacting celebrities. And people were just like, who cares? They're rich. Why would we give our tears to these rich people? The same thing just happened with McSweeney. McSweeney, the actor that died. That was in euphoria.
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Euphoria. Okay? So, like, I saw people being nice.
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He had a GoFundMe for his children and things for any. There was even.
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I saw the Dawson Creek guy who had to go fund.
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No, no, no, no, no. It was. It was the. The From Euphoria. But basically he had als. I think ALS is what took him out. And, yeah, like, he didn't have the money to pay for all his medical bills. So much so that Johnny Depp allowed him to live in his home rent free for the past year. Yeah. So like, and there's people that were like, why the fuck would we give our hardworking money to this celebrity? And it's like, that's the thing. Like, people just have this idea of money as if it can buy everything. And a lot, a lot of times these celebrities don't have the money you think they have. And I mean, even for, for me, even you saying, like, you know, financial stress is one of the bigger stresses. I mean, there's illnesses as well that I'm realizing are just as big and navigating those things. And so it's just like, of course, yeah, yeah.
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When I say that, I mean, I know what you're. You're experiencing and what we've all experienced. You know, I think I'm talking about when it comes to day to day shit. And we got a friend that's really going through it. We all know the weight of the world, what that feels like when you can't make it to the first. Truly now. And I just to share, I recently told Mandy, y', all, I had a friend of mine who has a job that really did well. Six figure job, freelancer, and I just found out was working at a TJ Maxx and gave her some bread because I feel like it's. She just sent me money back today and basically was like, hey, I got paid whatever amount of money. It was a third of what I gave her. It was a small amount of money. And I was shocked she sent it back to me because I figured it would be a while. And she's like, not like, I really appreciate you lending me money. I never asked for it, but I may ask for it one day. And I want you to know I'm someone you can trust. And that shit felt so good because I want to be able to be there for my friends that have financial troubles and feel like we're both reliable in that moment. Because there's two things that happen. One of us is the reliable person because we lend. And the person that receives generally feels like they're not the reliable one. So I just think I felt a great weight from knowing that her pride was bigger than her.
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Not even her pride. It's called consideration. Yeah, it's consideration. And y' all know if y' all saw the, the vlog over on Patreon, consideration is literally a bare minimum ask from people. So to me. It's, it's also consideration. Now I will say we've been having some real life, you know, things happen. Sorry y'.
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All.
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Sorry.
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New York is also giving, you know, it's given. That's an emergency. Life is happening, bitch. They going to save somebody. Bitch. Hey guys, it's Mandy B from the Decisions Decisions podcast to tell you a little bit about something you should incorporate into your 2026 beauty routine. Now I have been a blonde haired girly and recently the blonde betrayed me. But I also realized it's because I probably wasn't giving my scalp and hair the treatment and oils it deserved. I recently went bald and said, you know what? I need to start from scratch. I was just put on to bask and lather. Now Baskin Lather is black owned and family operated, which I love because I don't know if y' all know a lot of our products that were once black owned are no longer and they are changing the ingredients up on us now. The thing that I love the most from this hair care line is the stimulating scalp and hair bomb. But nourishes and hydrates from the inside out with 100% natural ingredients which I know is going to be important while I'm growing back out my hair. Now I am only a couple weeks in so I will have to let you know how that goes, but users have seen results in about three months. They also have the hydrating hair mist that keeps any hair type soft, shiny and hydrated. And I've also been using their shampoo and conditioner that smells so good. Explore viral bestsellers and products of healthier hair of all types from Basque and Lather. Go to Bask and Lather Company and use code decisions for 20% off. That's 20% off@baskandlatherco.com code decisions. You might not be able to drop everything and book a ticket to Italy, but you can go to the theater this Friday for you Meet in Tuscany. Woolpacker, the guy who produced Girls Trip, brings us a brand new rom com with all the ingredients of your favorite classics. Heart, huge laughs and sizzling chemistry. All set in the enchanting vineyards of Tuscany. This film is the movie escape we've been waiting for. Starring Halle Bailey and Reggae Jean Page. You, me and Tuscany is the perfect film for date night or a night out with your girls. Get your rom com on with Universal Pictures. You meet in Tuscany directed by Cat Cuero. Only in theaters this Friday. Rated PG13. May be inappropriate for children under 13. Chime is changing the way people Bank Fee Free and smarter Banking Built just for you. Chime isn't just another banking app by the way, they unlock smarter banking for everyday people like yourself. Forget overdraft fees, minimum balance fees and monthly Chime turns everyday spending into real rewards and progress. Now by progress I mean it helps you build credit history stress free. And by rewards you can earn up to 3% APY on savings. Now that is seven times higher than a traditional bank. And hear me out, they have the Chime card. It's the cashback card that helps you build credit with your own money. Two things you don't see typically come together until now. No annual fees, no interest and no strings attached. And when you get qualifying direct deposits, you get 1.5% cash back on eligible Chime card purchases. Baby, I wish they had this when I was younger because I was one of those that got a credit card way too soon and messed up my credit and boy would this have helped me. This is definitely the way to take more control of your money. Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. Join the millions who are already banking fee free today. It just takes a few minutes to sign up. Head to chime.com decisions that's chime.com D E C I S I O N
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Tired of long wash days and heat damaged hair? Same. That's why I have to tell you about Revair, the game changing hair dryer that uses reverse airflow to dry, stretch and smooth in one step so you spend less time styling and more time living your life with gentle airflow and multiple heat settings. Revair locks in shine, reduces frizz and respects your curl pattern, whether it's coils, kinks, braids like me, locs or extensions. Visit my Revair.com and use promo code decisions50 for $50 off your device or the total package. That's my Revair.com your crown deserves it.
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Now I will say where we are dealing with real life things. Our YGD this week actually seems like one I think we can actually have an answer to. So the title of this is I love My Boyfriend, but My Vagina is Bored. By the way, if you want us to give you our most professional advice on your problems in your life, send us an email decisionspodmail.com or if you're a patron, make sure you write us a message over there. All right, let's get into it. All right, I'm a Black woman in my late 20s and I've been dating my boyfriend for a little under a year. Outside of this issue, he's honestly great to me. He's kind, supportive, emotionally present and treats me better than a lot of men I've dated before. We'll take that problem is our sex life, or honestly, the lack of one. My boyfriend is Mexican and has a very small penis, which he's extremely insecure about. The few times we've tried to have penetrative sex, he ends up going limp before he can even get it in. He's told me it's because he knows I've dated Black men before and the stereotype about Black men being bigger, girl, he blaming Black men for his little tiny penis is crazy, he said. He said the stereo of Black men being bigger gets in his head. He says he's terrified that he won't be enough for me. I've tried to reassure him that I'm with him for a reason and that I'm attracted to him, but the same situation keeps happening. At this point, we rarely even try anymore because I can tell he gets stuck in his head about it. The thing is, I'm struggling. I feel bad even saying it, but I'm really craving good sex right now. It honestly feels like I'm in a celibate relationship that I didn't sign up for. Please, girl. He does try to eat me out and use his fingers, but if I'm being completely honest, he's not very good at it and it don't really get much. I don't really get much out of it either. He also doesn't have a ton of experience because his insecurity has kept him from pursuing a lot of people in the past. I've even tried to test the waters on things like swinging or opening the relationship, but he shuts those ideas down immediately. So now I'm stuck wondering, is sexual incompatibility a valid reason to end an otherwise great relationship, or is this something couples can realistically work through I genuinely care about him, but I'm also starting to feel like I'm craving for a proper dicking. And it's getting louder. Please help a poor, unintentional, celibate woman out. Thanks. Love you guys.
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Or let me stop. All right, listen, bitch, my homegirl's experiencing this shit right now real bad. And she's going through family issues, too, so the least she'd be able to get his dick met a great guy. Nigga can't get it up. It's been like, bitch, he got money. He's taking her on trips and shit. Can't fuck. Oh, my God. And he was at my birthday party. She was like, fuck, bitch, I'm going through.
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It was.
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It was sad. But I have this thought. Okay, okay, Immediately this is a hard pass because. Oh, for sure that his dick issues have to do with you and your past.
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No, no, no, no, no.
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He said he knows that you've had
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blah, blah, blah, but also the insecurity of, why are you thinking about black dick? Why you trying to fuck my.
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Plus, I didn't know why she brought up that he was Mexican. I thought she was trying to be funny. I'm like, that ain't why he got smart.
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But now it makes sense why she brought it up.
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Okay, bitch, you literally mean like this. Say a.
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He a.
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Say all that to say, so he's being a dick to you about his dick instead of taking accountability and saying, hey, maybe I need to try some pills, et cetera. I'm thinking about my homegirl because basically she said to me they had been fucking around for months, and she's like, I'm waiting for him to tell me why he can't get all the way hard. And I'm like, baby, he never going to tell you. He's going to keep fingering you and keep eating you out, satisfying you. And that's not happening. So here's the true reality of all that you can do. Sorry, New York is New Yorking in the back of my house. All you can do is one, tell him that he correct. Five, be like, I want you to go see a doctor. There shouldn't be, like, a way that you're not keeping it up. There was another factor with my homegirl, the. That she was with and he was a heavy drinker. And so she's attributing daily drinking and stuff like that. I think he works, like, at a bar or something, but. Or owns a bar, something like that. It's hospitality, but his job requires some drinking. And so I Wonder if maybe there's another factor here. Smoking, drinking. Has he tried anything? If he hasn't tried to help himself, you can make the recommendation if he puts it back on. Being insecure that you fuck black niggas don't know what to do. Break up with him. It's weird.
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Now, my first. My first advice would be, break up with this nigga, bro. You're. You're in your late 20s. You got time, girl. This ain't it. And yes, I do think that sexual incompatibility with a partner who's also not willing to open the relationship or allow you to get pleasure elsewhere, it's inevitable that it'll end. However, if I'm thinking in the horrible decisions fashion, there was a thing that we brought on stage at one of our live shows at Sony hall when we were. We had like a toy chest. And I think that there could be fun in role playing. You getting him an extender for his dick. Where he puts. It's pretty much a strap on for a man where his dick goes inside of the extender. And if you want have fun and get, get, make it black so that he could have a big black dick. Get that nigga a big black dick so he could fuck you with the big black dick that he's insecure of because now he got one himself.
B
Oh, I mean, isn't she a fun person for a suggestion or.
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No, I mean, I'm trying to think out the box because I do genuinely think the emotional weight of you not being physically and sexually pleased is only going to get worse. And the fact that y' all went from trying to barely even trying it to where you are now in an unintentional celibate relationship. I really genuinely think, like, bro, you've been with him for less than a year. The investment isn't even really there, girl.
B
Like, go back, Mandy, because in those honeymoon phases, like, you have more faith and hope. You're like, oh, my God, girl, this ain't a honeymoon.
C
He not even getting his dick up the honeymoon. You at least get sex.
B
I'm kind of right.
C
Like, how is this honeymoon? She's writing into a podcast. Weezy, the honeymoon is over. They probably had a two month honeymoon, but it's only because he was a kind man. Like, she liked him because he was kind, he was nice. He was showing up in all the ways the fuck niggas weren't. You know why? Cause his dick don't work. This is even why you got a kind man. I'm just saying, you know the niggas with the third leg, they're not the sweetest, they're not the most emotionally available, but they got that thing. This is why he's such a kind, generous man, because he can't fulfill you in a. In a way that really matters.
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The nicest guy I ever dated did have weak dick. I'm not going, bro. Ah, what a sweetheart. At this point, he was. I'm watching a show called DTF St. Louis right now.
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Oh my God. Wait, wait, wait. We have to do a cinema on when I tell you. By the way, I love Jason Bateman.
B
What do you think he's getting pegged or you thought he was getting one
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of my favorite whites. Definitely at one point was getting all of my.
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That was the Amazon position we've done at live show.
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Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw the Amazon.
B
I rewinded and fast forward 10 times. I'm like, he's getting pegged. He's like, no, he's.
C
When I say the sitting on the face and. And here's the other thing too, right? Yes, his dick is not working. But I am curious then, if you love this man that much, how much you're open to testing out other kinks to see if there's other ways you can get pleasure outside of penetrative dick and vagina intercourse. Because yeah, good, good thing to bring up. He was sexually aroused and turned on by other things. Even the other man was pleased by just watching because they weren't having faith
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in ways that I don't,
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you know.
C
Good point, wheezy.
B
Don't put me any hoe.
C
You just brought up DTF St. Louis with all these kinks that literally the show is aiming towards everything sexual that's not penetrative sex in the most kink friendly, non friendly way because they're fucking solving a murder. It's so good.
B
Every day I see how we get closer and closer to not being a real podcast with real advice. Why this is we're going to closet while she get fucked by some BBC.
C
Well, she already said that. She tried to suggest swinging and opening, which by the way, once a nigger come to you and ask you if we could swing her open and the answer is no, the next step is cheating.
B
I do want to know if she's black. What's the email?
C
Yes, she is. She led with. She's a black woman in her late
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20s and you uncomfortable that a Mexican is telling you he's uncomfortable that you fucked other black people?
C
To me, I'm not going to lie and she followed that up with. Because of the stereotype of black men having big dicks. Can I also, as a woman with a sex podcast, all right, These black dicks don't be dicking like y' all out here thinking they do. Oh, a lot of. A lot of non dick and black dicks. Can we stop with this idea that all these niggas is just hung because these dicks not dicking like the stereotype says?
B
Are you talking about bitch?
C
I mean, I've had big dicks, yes. But I've also seen a whole bunch of.
B
Is insane.
C
The dick not dicking. It's a lot of schmediums out here. It's a lot of schmediums.
B
Thank you so much for joining in.
C
So, so basically I will say both of us in summation will say that you should just. Bro, I'm doing this like a 5.5 paragraph essay. Information.
B
I see you trying to cook information.
C
Break up with that nigga. I'm like, that's all we got. That's. That's where it's at. Yeah.
B
It's not it, babe.
C
It's really not.
B
It's only so long that nice movie Cuddles will get you.
C
And unfortunately, we are ethically non monogamous queens. So before you get to the point of cheating on him, I just think that the relationship has, you know, meta. It's met its demise.
B
I think it's over, hit its deadline. Anyway, if you want to check out our patreon.com Horrible Decisions, you will see that we have the video for this on there. We also have our town halls every month that you can join in live, that you can listen to. And of course, and everything is ad free on there.
C
I listen. I love y'. All. I love y' all here on the Apple, the Spotify, the I Heart, the Black effect, all of the things. But if you want this podcast ad free, if you want the podcast ad free for just $5 a month, you get all this shit ad free in the audio version. Okay? So go ahead on over there, get the. Get the pennies out, shake that piggy bank, and head on up to the Patreon. That's patreon.com backslash horrible decisions.
B
All right now.
C
All right now. Thank you guys. See you next week. See ya.
B
This is Wheezy. WTF from Decisions Decisions. Ladies, let's talk about taking control of our sexual health. That's grown woman energy. You may think HIV affects someone else somewhere else, but the truth is it's impacting our community and some of us are being hit harder than others. Black women make up just 13% of the women in the US yet account for nearly half of new HIV diagnoses amongst women. Taking care of ourselves is community care. Know your options, ask questions and protect your peace and your body. That's using your power. Sponsored by Care for the Culture from Gilead Sciences Tired of long wash days and heat damaged hair? Same. That's why I have to tell you about Revair. Revair is a game changing hair dryer that uses reverse airflow to dry, stretch and smooth in one step so you can spend less time styling your hair and more time living your life. Unlike traditional blow dryers, Revair uses gentle suction and controlled heat to protect your strands while locking in moisture and shine. Whether you're rocking coils, kinks, twists, braids, locs or extensions, Revair works with your texture, not against it. That means you can get salon quality finish right at home. Less tugging, less breakage and way less time prepping for your night out. Especially during the winter months when you're looking for that extra boost of self care. Revair will help you feel confident and sexy in your hair. Visit my Revair.com today and use promo codes decision50 for $50 off your total package. Don't wait. Your crown deserves it. That's my Revair.com it's me, Andy B.
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From the Decisions Decisions podcast and my friends in the US Virgin Islands want you to experience the beautiful islands of St. Thomas, St. Croix and St. John. USVI is hands down one of my favorite spots. And the best part, if you're traveling from the US, you don't even need a passport. I'm all about the food, the people, the culture and those beaches. They are absolutely beautiful. Head to visit usvi.com to start planning your next vacation. That's visit usvi.com usvinaturally in rhythm Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile with a message for everyone paying Big Wireless Way too much. Please, for the love of everything good in this world, stop with Mint. You can get premium wireless for just $15 a month. Of course, if you enjoy overpaying. No judgments. But that's weird. Okay, one judgment anyway. Give it a try@mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment
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of $45 for three month plan equivalent to $15 per month required intro rate first three months only, then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See full terms@mintmobile.com this is an iHeart podcast.
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Guaranteed human.
Podcast: Decisions, Decisions
Hosts: Mandii B & WeezyWTF
Date: April 8, 2026
Network: The Black Effect Podcast Network & iHeartPodcasts
This episode, framed around a listener’s heartfelt dilemma, dives into the nuanced realities of sexual incompatibility in otherwise strong relationships. With their signature humor, candor, and empathy, Mandii B and WeezyWTF respond to a letter from a Black woman in her late 20s questioning whether sexual dissatisfaction is enough reason to leave her otherwise loving boyfriend. The episode unpacks themes of intimacy, boundaries, financial stress, societal expectations, and the pressure to ignore personal needs for the sake of “good” partnership.
Timestamps: 03:03–09:51
Mandii and Weezy start with frank self-reflection about judging friends’ life decisions, feeling guilt for being "judgy", and the complex emotions of supporting friends through poor choices.
Discussion around feeling unsupported as financially successful Black women:
Financial success doesn’t erase other forms of stress—emotional, physical, and mental burdens remain.
Stories are shared about being the financially stable friend, lending money, and the sense of reciprocity and pride when help is appreciated and repaid.
Timestamps: 15:00–25:53
Immediate Reaction: Sympathy and identification with similar stories among their circles.
On Insecurity & Accountability:
Alternative Solutions:
On Sexual Compatibility:
The Kind Partner Paradox:
Debunking Stereotypes:
Conclusion:
This episode of "Decisions, Decisions" is a raw, honest exploration of sexual incompatibility and whether love “on paper” is enough if the bedroom isn’t working. Mandii and Weezy use listener questions to springboard into broader issues—friendship, financial assumptions, and societal myths about sex—making this an episode as insightful as it is entertaining. Their bottom line: real partnership requires real compatibility, in bed and out.
For more unfiltered advice and bonus content:
Check out their Patreon at patreon.com/HorribleDecisions