You've Got Decisions: Platonic Intimacy

Summary

Podcast Summary

Decisions, Decisions – Episode: "You've Got Decisions: Platonic Intimacy"

Hosts: Mandii B & WeezyWTF
Release Date: June 17, 2026
Podcast Network: The Black Effect Podcast Network & iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Decisions, Decisions" explores the complexities of platonic intimacy, particularly within the context of traditional relationships and shifting societal norms. Mandii B and WeezyWTF respond to a listener's letter that unpacks issues of emotional and physical boundaries, non-monogamy, and the confusion that arises when deep platonic bonds blur with romantic or sexual attraction. With humor and candor, the hosts reflect on their own experiences and provide a raw, honest critique of the letter-writer’s choices, highlighting the messy reality that often accompanies attempts to break free from relationship scripts.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Listener Letter: Platonic Intimacy Gone Awry [03:11–07:16]

• Letter Summary: The listener ("Mommy") is a 26-year-old mother still with her child's father ("DJ"). After a trip to NYC with friends, including her guy best friend ("Gono," DJ's cousin), she engaged in platonic cuddling, hand-holding, and sensual dancing while on ecstasy. She grapples with guilt and confusion over boundaries, monogamy, and her partner's feelings.
• Notable Quote:
  • "I think we have so many conditioning around male and female connections that limit us from feeling safe and diving deeper. But there's something so healing about stepping into platonic intimacy with the opposite sex." (Listener Letter, 05:31)

2. The Line Between Platonic and Romantic [07:16–09:31]

• Mandii and Weezy immediately question whether boundaries were crossed, highlighting how physical touch (even “platonic” cuddling) with a friend can trigger insecurity, especially when your partner is left out.
• Both hosts raise doubt about the “platonic” label, noting the emotional impact on DJ, and suggesting that honest communication was missing.

3. Non-Monogamy or Escape? [09:31–11:47]

• Weezy’s Analysis:
  Weezy argues that the listener is confusing non-monogamous desire with restlessness and a craving for freedom.
  • "Non monogamy is thoughts that you could have sitting at home...Boredom doesn’t make you non monogamous. Wanting to go out and party doesn’t make you non monogamous. And a lack of sex in your life with your current partner doesn’t make you non monogamous." (Weezy, 10:08)
• She points out that the urge might be less about relationship structure and more about the listener’s unmet needs and wishes to reclaim lost "single girl" experiences.

4. Mandii’s Perspective: Lying to Yourself (and Your Partner) [13:44–15:56]

• Mandii’s Reflection:
  Mandii strongly asserts that the listener is “lying to yourself and your partner," noting that the account avoids honestly labeling her actions as disrespectful toward her partner.
• Notable Moment:
  • "Would you be okay if your baby daddy did this with your cousin?" (Mandii, 15:56)
• Both hosts note the lack of transparency—the listener did not inform DJ about the level of intimacy with his cousin.

5. Emotional Honesty and Non-Monogamy Ethics [16:15–18:42]

• Weezy shares a personal story about her recent engagement and how being non-monogamous is not about moments of temptation or dissatisfaction but is an identity and value system that runs deeper.
  • "For you to consider non monogamy in moments of unhappiness...you know you want to cheat." (Weezy, 18:14)
• The hosts highlight the importance of ethical non-monogamy—open discussion and mutual respect, not retroactively framing boundary-crossing as “exploration.”

6. Call for Self-Reflection and Hard Truths [18:42–20:32]

• Mandii calls out how adopting the language of “non-monogamy” without honesty or ethical engagement does a disservice to those who practice it authentically.
  • "You cross a boundary that in your mind you know you did. But now because it felt good and you liked it, although you didn’t tell your partner, you’re like, I want to feel this again." (Mandii, 19:37)
• Suggests the listener is using new relationship language to avoid addressing the real issue: a lack of fulfillment in her relationship.

7. Advice and Takeaways [20:34–23:20]

• The hosts agree: Be honest with yourself and your partner before using non-monogamy as an escape or an excuse.
• "You need to make sure that this is a healthy relationship before introducing another person or other people within this dynamic." (Mandy, 22:35)
• They urge the listener to consider if she would truly feel comfortable with her partner engaging in the same behavior.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Rationalizing Boundary-Crossing:
  "What you’re doing with his homeboy is so fucking wrong." – Weezy (11:47)

• On Self-Deception:
  "You are lying to yourself and you are lying to your partner." – Mandii (13:53)

• On Non-Monogamy as Identity vs. Impulse:
  "I don’t feel non monogamous when I’m tempted. I feel non monogamous in my being." – Weezy (09:44)

• On Retroactive Justification:
  "You’re just wanting to excuse your behavior and put it under an umbrella of something that sounds good, but you’re going about it the wrong way." – Mandii (19:37)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:11 – 07:16: Listener letter read and initial reactions
• 09:31 – 11:47: Weezy’s deep dive on non-monogamy and party culture vs. relationship values
• 13:44 – 15:56: Mandii’s critique of honesty and boundaries
• 16:15 – 18:42: Weezy parallels engagement joy and ethical non-monogamy
• 18:42 – 20:32: Mandii warns about misusing relationship language to cover for cheating
• 20:34 – 23:20: Final advice; necessity for honest self-reflection and owning one’s choices

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Overall Tone & Style

True to the show’s brand, the discussion is candid, unfiltered, and at times playfully confrontational. Mandii and Weezy blend empathy for young women’s confusion with tough love and pointed humor, never shying away from calling out what they see as self-deception or rationalization. Their advice urges radical honesty—both with oneself and with one’s partner—grounded in respectful and ethical frameworks, especially when challenging traditional relationship norms.

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Summary:
"Platonic Intimacy" is used as a springboard for deeper questions about honesty, boundaries, and emotional needs in relationships. The hosts challenge listeners to differentiate between wanting more freedom and genuinely seeking non-monogamy, emphasizing that open conversation and ethical behavior are absolute requirements for any meaningful re-negotiation of relationship terms. The episode is an entertaining, pointed reminder that intimacy—platonic, romantic, or otherwise—always comes back to honesty and respect.

Transcript

[Mandy]

This is an iHeart podcast.

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[Weezy]

Mom, can you tell me a story?

[Mom]

Sure. Once upon a time, a mom needed a new car.

[Weezy]

Was she brave?

[Mom]

She was tired mostly. But she went to Carvana.com and found a great car at a great price. No secret treasure map required.

[Weezy]

Did you have to fight a dragon?

[Mom]

Nope. She bought it 100% online from her bed, actually.

[Weezy]

Was it scary?

[Mom]

Honey, it was as unscary as car buying could be.

[Weezy]

Did the car have a sunroof?

[Mom]

It did, actually.

[Weezy]

Okay, good story.

[Mom]

Car buying you'll want to tell stories about. Buy your car today on Carvana. Deliver fees may apply if you would

[Weezy]

like to have us answer your questions. If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible thruffle, guess what?

[Mandy]

You've got decisions. You got decision.

[Weezy]

I do too. I feel like it's a McDonald's ad when I do it.

[Mandy]

I mean. Oh, someone told me to sing. Yeah, I mean, you kind of just sung a little bit. That was a little bit of singing. It was a little bit of singing.

[Weezy]

I tried to make it.

[Mandy]

Do it. Listen.

[Weezy]

But we're back, y'.

[Mandy]

All.

[Weezy]

It's another hump day. And also, just so that everyone knows that listens to these, if you want to watch us and see how gorgeous we are on patreon.com backslash. Horrible decisions. You actually get the video every single week. You get to see us. You get to see.

[Mandy]

What did I call you that?

[Weezy]

Everybody was like that. You was mad, Little Bill.

[Mandy]

Why would you bring that up again?

[Weezy]

Cause you're cute, Little Bill.

[Mandy]

You saw the comments and you was dead wrong for calling me Lil Bill.

[Weezy]

Joe Dirt was worse. And that's what you called yourself. I'd rather be Lil Dur is not worse.

[Mandy]

The mullet made sense. You called me a little bald headed black boy cartoon of a pedophilia. Oh, he's a whole PDF. What?

[Weezy]

When does this come out?

[Mandy]

What do you mean? It doesn't matter. The nigga's still in jail. I'M talking about Bill Cosmo.

[Weezy]

No, no, no, that's not it.

[Mandy]

Oh, girl. Anyway though, let's get into helping y'

[Weezy]

all

[Mandy]

be hot girls this summer. I guess we have whole mail from mom, which is crazy that y' all keep thinking that Weezy and I can help y' all out, but. Oh yeah, no, I mean this one maybe because she's young. She's young, so we at least been there, done that. At least in the young days. But we'll get into it.

[Weezy]

Not us giving advice based off our abortion kids.

[Mandy]

I mean, you know, we are sexually liberated beings and I think we can help the hoes find their way.

[Weezy]

Sounds good.

[Mandy]

If you want to send us your letter, email us decisionspod Gmail.com. let's get into it. The listener put the subject Mommy wants more.

[Weezy]

Ooh.

[Mandy]

Hi. I've been a part of the whorehive since 2020. I love y' all and am so grateful for the safe conversations y' all have shared. Being a listener to sexually liberating conversations in my early twenties was so necessary. I am very grateful for this space and have always wanted to submit some homemail. And here it is. After all this time, I hope y' all are able to read this and help a young mamacita out. So I am a 26 year old with a 2 year old and I'm still with my baby daddy. I recently went on a solo five day trip to New York with some good friends. It was so special and perfect. Although it was my two girlfriends and one guy best friend, I spent the majority of the time with him. Let's call him Go no. Me and Go no spent every day together and we even shared a bed. We sent the intention of platonic cuddling girl and it felt really sweet. He is good friends with my baby daddy. Let's call him dj. Girl, what are we doing?

[Weezy]

Wait a minute. Mommy needs some what? What the fuck was this?

[Mandy]

Mama wants more.

[Weezy]

Bitch, I'm not gonna hold you. Sometimes I feel like y' all might think these are fake cause they're crazy. And I agree with you bro.

[Mandy]

The email's there and I'm not gonna tell you her government name cause that's there too. Anyways, this he is good friends with my baby daddy and we gonna call the baby daddy dj. So Gono is like an uncle to our child and we are close back home as well. But this trip felt different.

[Weezy]

Bitch.

[Mandy]

Maybe cause you introduced cuddling.

[Weezy]

Oh yeah.

[Mandy]

We had the best time and definitely deepened our friendship. We stepped more into physical touch but like, respectfully, like leaning our heads on each other's shoulders on the train or holding hands after a long night of clubbing and walking back to the house

[Weezy]

holding, oh, bitch, you are really depressed.

[Mandy]

I felt really pure, and I was trying to step into how I would treat my girlfriends and show my love that way. I think we have so many conditioning around male and female connections that limit us from feeling safe and diving deeper. But there's something so healing about stepping into platonic intimacy with the opposite sex. I definitely can see where it can get tricky for a lot of people, though, if they take the sexualized conditioning too serious. Like maybe me. So it was all innocent and very childlike expressions of love until you was fucking. We all did Molly and went to Nowadays.

[Weezy]

Girl, what are you Me Do I know this girl?

[Mandy]

Weezy, I know you've had a night at Nowadays, so good. But yeah, I danced.

[Weezy]

Wait, that's what she wrote?

[Mandy]

Yeah, she did write that.

[Weezy]

Oh.

[Mandy]

But yeah, I danced so hard and sexy, it was like I was reclaiming my femininity and my body again. We were dancing all night, and at one point, I ended up dancing with Gono. And when I say we were dancing, we were grinding and dipping, hands on hips and all. It was really horny. But definitely because of the Molly and just the sexy vibe of the club and music. It was so hot. I keep thinking about that night and how in sync our bodies became. So, yeah, this is where the platonic perspective started getting tricky for me. Nothing happened. And we've since. And we've since had conversations about how we obviously want to stay friends and honor boundaries and respect my partner dj, because we both love it.

[Weezy]

Respect.

[Mandy]

It was just a fun night with movement and drugs. When I came home, DJ felt so cold. Going from a trip where everyone was loving so deeply, then coming home to him, the contrast was striking.

[Weezy]

Oh, honey, it's.

[Mandy]

We talked about it, and he said he was feeling envious of Gono and seeing us together through pictures just made him feel weird. I think it's valid. But we also wanted him to be there on the trip that he chose not to come on. So we all still went. I felt a little guilty, but as I've been sitting with it, I recognize that I haven't done anything wrong. Bitch, we'll get there. I allowed love to flow through, and it didn't cross boundaries and conversations have. And conversations have been had to eliminate any romanticism. But this whole experience just showed me how. How much I want to love on my people and I want to Dance freely and sensually. I don't feel like I can. She's 26. Oh, yeah. I don't feel like I can without guilt because of the expectations that come with monogamy. I feel like this experience just awoke something in me that I'm confused about and would appreciate your perspectives. He has since become really insecure about my friendship with Gono, and it's been frustrating. It's been frustrating because I understand his insecurity, but it also feels so fear based. I genuinely only want Gono as a friend, but his role sparked a lesson for me about what I feel I want in my relationship. I feel trapped by monogamy, and I feel like my body and the way my love flows has to be channeled through a man's expectations of me. Do y' all have any advice on how to move through this and what steps I. I can take? I don't want to be selfish and make rash decisions, but I also don't want to be tied to something that feels like I have to push parts of myself down. Help. Okay, sorry, Mandy. I know you don't like long emails, but I love y' all and thank you so much for reading this far. If you have. Wishing y' all the best. And of course, she shared her IG for Wheezy. I'll give it to you later. Wheezy,

[Weezy]

let me talk to you. Young Molly. Girl, the phase that you're in right now gives non monogamous only because you don't really want to be in a relationship sometimes, okay? When we're in this mode of partying and having fun, you made a comment about wanting to dance and express your love and blah, blah, blah. That actually doesn't give non monogamy to me. That gives non monogamy starts. You don't need to be out and want to exercise it. Non monogamy is thoughts that you could have sitting at home. I don't know if you could validate this, Mandy, but, like, I don't feel non monogamous when I'm tempted. I feel non monogamous in my being, right? Like, I don't need to see a fine ass nigga outside to be like, maybe I'm non monogamous. That doesn't happen. What I think is happening is your mom. You've got, you know, things that make you feel tied down at home to where you want to be just so free and expressive. But that's single girl shit. Because if you're not feeling it necessarily when you're at home, here's some other things too that I want all the listeners to understand when it comes to non monogamy, your boredom as a mom or as a wife, if you're listening, boredom doesn't make you non monogamous. Okay? Wanting to go out and party doesn't make you non monogamous. And a lack of sex in your life with your current partner doesn't make you non monogamous. These are things that kind of lack from your life. They don't making you think non monogamy could fix it. I'm not saying you all the way aren't. I'm just saying the instances you're bringing up don't coincide with how non monogamy works. So I think that because you're 26 and a mom, you haven't had those years to fuck off and get up and go to fucking nowadays and whatever. Whereas a lot of us who didn't have kids early got to so I think you're in a phase of needing to play around and have a good time while also respecting your relationship and wanting to respect yourself as whether that whatever that looks like as a mom. But what you're doing with his homeboy is so fucking wrong.

[Mandy]

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[Weezy]

Oh, me?

[Mandy]

No. Oh, hear me out. You are lying to yourself.

[Weezy]

Yep.

[Mandy]

And you are lying to your partner. And I say that because you did not introduce this as a woman who has a two year old with her partner or boyfriend. You started this and was like, I'm a mom. Yep. And I'm still with the baby daddy. The way that you even referenced the baby daddy was interesting to me because it didn't seem like you were happy in your relationship. Another reason why I don't feel like you were happy in your relationship was because as soon as you got away with him disrespecting the relationship that he has with this man that you're on a trip with, you chose intimacy, physical intimacy with another man, which makes me believe that you are lacking that at home. Thirdly, in this entire email, you referenced the conversations that you and Gono had, the friend about how you're gonna not make this romanticized. I would love to know.

[Weezy]

I would've rather you talk to if

[Mandy]

your daddy or your partner knows that you are cuddling, holding hands, and sensually bumping and grinding with his cousin.

[Weezy]

Terrible, terrible, terrible.

[Mandy]

Like, I feel like you said that he was jealous because.

[Weezy]

That's right. They're cousins, bro.

[Mandy]

That's his cousin.

[Weezy]

God, I forgot.

[Mandy]

You mentioned that he was cold because of the pictures and because he didn't attend the trip, you did not say, hey, babe, while I was on this trip, me and your cousin cuddled. Hey, babe, while I was on this trip, me and your cousin held hands. Hey, babe, on this trip, I also was bumping and grinding on your cousin and it felt a little less platonic, but we didn't take it all the way. So your idea of non monogamy, I also think is stemming from the fact that, you know, you've actually crossed the boundary and pretty much cheated. Sit with if you would be okay if your baby Daddy did this with your cousin?

[Weezy]

Hmm.

[Mandy]

Is your baby daddy allowed to platonically cuddle with a bitch? Is your baby daddy allowed to hold hands and party and grind and do all the physical, platonic, intimate moments you had with his cousin? Would you feel betrayed to find out he did that with another woman?

[Weezy]

Here's also the thing. Forget another woman throwing me in your face. I also want to bring up something about non monogamy. So when I, when I jumped in, said, when would this release? We'll post this because I want to bring up something that happened last night that's related to this engagement. Okay? So if you all got to see my Instagram today, you now know I'm engaged. Yay.

[Mandy]

Cool. The post is out.

[Weezy]

We're great. I went to a dinner for Shan Booty last night, okay? She is the new chief intimacy officer of a vibrator company called Plus One. And the dinner was for Cosmopolitan Shout Out. Shan Booty. We love Sham Booty. At the dinner, I'm gonna text you

[Mandy]

who the girl was, okay?

[Weezy]

There was another person at the dinner. You know who this is? And I was like, all eyes on her. Blah, blah, blah. She's so hot. Okay? So I start talking to the girl, and Cammie and Nina Parker were like,

[Mandy]

damn, bitch, did you've been engaged for, like, 72 hours?

[Weezy]

And I was like, so I'm still excited and in love with him. Like, what the fuck does this have to do? Like, y' all act like I'm cheating because I'm having this moment with somebody. And it's funny because when I got home, I called him and said the same thing. And I realized that was when my non monogamy really hit me. Because as I was leaving the dinner, I seen this nigga. So 550. It is so crazy too. He's like, have we met? We have never met. I was like, no. Da, da, da. So then we chatting, and I'm like, yo, I'm obsessed. Can't wait for this wedding. I can't wait for this moment in my life. Can't wait to have babies and live happily ever after. Ain't changed. And that is at my highest point and peak of happiness for you to consider non monogamy in moments of unhappiness.

[Mandy]

Yep.

[Weezy]

You know you want to cheat. This is where we get the Klay Thompson. This is where we get. That ain't shit that we always talk about.

[Mandy]

Oh, maybe I'm polyamorous.

[Weezy]

Maybe this right? And so I just want to say this honorably for people that are monogamous that should just leave their partner. That's what makes it worse. Besides the fact that you being trifling on some other shit. You bringing up non monogamy actually is an insult to all of us that are ethical about it. You know what I'm saying?

[Mandy]

Because that's what I'm saying. She. She left out like nothing in here says. And I had to sit down with my partner about how intimate I was with his cousin. You didn't say that part. So like you're starting off this idea of non monogamy lying and being distruthful to your partner. And I agree. I think that those intimate moments with his cousin, that physical touch is perhaps what you're lacking in your own relationship. I agree with that. That's crazy.

[Sponsor Voice]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

That this was probably not. Me and Mandy agree fully.

[Mandy]

But.

[Weezy]

But really I think it's just hurtful because low key. I'm so sorry. I know you wrote in. I know you're only 26. I know you got a kid. I don't want to drag you. But this the. That be making like us look bad, bro.

[Mandy]

Well, no, let's be fair too. And I think I talked about this with. With the whatchamacallit. We are now being introduced to these words in a way that you're just wanting to excuse your behavior and put it under an umbrella of something that sounds good, but you're going about it the wrong way. The same way Weezy, you said, clay, you can't sit here and say you think you're non monogamous after cheating. This is exactly what this listener did. You cross a boundary that in your mind you know you did. But now because it felt good and you liked it, although you didn't tell your partner. You're like, I want to feel this again. But it's probably because you're just lacking something and you don't know how to effectively communicate to your boyfriend that you're lacking this. But now you really can't communicate that you got it from his cousin.

[Weezy]

Col. I know. Col.

[Mandy]

I'm not going to lie. My advice would be to first be honest with him.

[Weezy]

This is very Jerry Springer, by the way.

[Mandy]

Now this is crazy.

[Weezy]

I just watched Ringmaster a few weeks ago and I don't know if anyone ever saw the Jerry Springer movie is so funny and cute. Not cute. It's ghetto. But it is just very. Like I'm fucking flirting with my baby daddy's cousin. Like, are you crazy, bitch? Talking about you non monogamous. How can I Practice this.

[Mandy]

What the you think?

[Weezy]

Cause we both do Molly and go to nowadays. I'm on your side.

[Mandy]

Yep.

[Weezy]

She do. When you guys write in, and I want everyone to understand this, and I mean this deeply. You bitches write in and make me side with the man. What a disappointment to my life and my career. You know, you gotta be fucked up.

[Mandy]

Y' all know that's my job. That's my job to side with the men, y'.

[Weezy]

All. Mandy and Sarah Fontenot. Y' all bitches side with the dick.

[Mandy]

That's how you know. You really brought up here and said, I can't remember nowadays. And how do I now you not gonna loop me in with Sarah, bro. That's what we not finna do, bitch. Cause I did not agree with a lot.

[Weezy]

She. Hold on. I agreed with Sarah a few weeks ago. She's basically had a clip. And I was like, I see what she's saying. She was like, posting swimsuit pics and stuff like that. As a woman in a relationship. Like, it's for the beach and the pool. You can't just be up in a bathroom, like, posting your shit. I was like, I feel that. But then let me make you laugh. I put on a sports bra and a pair of underwear, and I was like, damn, I'm looking good. And I started taking pictures in the bathroom.

[Mandy]

You can do that.

[Weezy]

And then I hit my. I mean, you can send it to

[Mandy]

him, but yeah, you. I mean, but that's. But you know what? You can bitch if y' all can. Bitch, you can. If your nigga says it doesn't bother him. Fuck the Internet. You be like, my nigga don't. He don't mind.

[Weezy]

But it's like the message you. But what message can I send, bro? I mean, in an E and M relationship where I don't fuck with his cousin. How about that?

[Mandy]

Anyways, hopefully this helped. I think you need to talk to him. You need to set boundaries. But before you even do that, you have to be real with yourself. If this is a relationship that's fulfilling, because as long as it's not, non monogamy is not the answer. You need to make sure that this is a healthy relationship before introducing another person or other people within this dynamic. Hope this helps. Hope you look more into the definitions of these words and understand that you cheated. That this platonic intimacy that made you and the cousin have to halt the romanticized elements of this means that it went too much. You did too much.

[Weezy]

Anyways, and keep in mind, everyone else that's listening to this episode has the exact same opinion as us. So you don't need to write in anywhere else. Don't even tell a friend. Be embarrassed.

[Mandy]

Oh my God. Anyways, if you want to send your letter in, send it to decisionspodmail.com again. Thank you everyone who showed up to the one night only show last week. We enjoyed seeing the Whore Hive. It was a reunion, babe. And thank you guys so much. Until next time, see you next Wednesday. Hump day, Puss ass ho.

[Weezy]

Love y'.

[Mom]

All. Bye.

[Mandy]

This is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human.