You've Got Decisions: We’re Non Monogamous But He Made a Baby with Her!

Summary

Podcast Summary: Decisions, Decisions

Episode: You've Got Decisions: We’re Non Monogamous But He Made a Baby with Her!
Date: February 18, 2026
Hosts: Mandii B and WeezyWTF
Network: The Black Effect Podcast Network and iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

In this candid, laughter-filled yet thought-provoking episode, Mandii B and WeezyWTF field a complicated listener dilemma involving non-monogamy, boundaries, accidental pregnancy, and the realities of open relationships. After reflecting on recent episodes and personal insights, the hosts dive into a submission from a woman navigating the emotional and logistical fallout when her non-monogamous boyfriend fathers a child with another woman. Real talk about communication, sexual health, jealousy, and personal limits ensues, all with the duo's trademark blend of vulnerability, humor, and authenticity.

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Key Discussion Points and Major Insights

1. Reflection on Sex Work and ‘Happy Hoes’

(00:55 – 09:46)

• Mandii and Weezy discuss the after-effects of a recent episode with Apostle Dani and their debate over whether “hoes” (sex workers) can be happy.
• Weezy: “I believe that her line of sex work is depressing.” (03:16)
• Weezy emphasizes that some friends genuinely enjoy sex work, not all do so out of desperation or survival.
• Mandii grapples with emotions triggered by her own past survival experiences, highlighting nuanced motivations (paying for school, keeping the lights on, etc.).
• Mandy: “Dating a nigga with money is different than laying on your back, literally, for money.” (03:54)
• Both explore the idea that every job — sex work included — comes with highs and lows.

2. Survival vs. Thriving In Sex Work

(06:20 – 09:31)

• The duo debate whether successful, high-income sex workers are still “surviving” if they continue for the lifestyle.
• Mandii draws parallels with service industry workers lured by fast cash.
• Mandy: “No matter how much money y’all are making, a lotta these women...can’t just stop and be good for the rest of their life. They have to keep doing this in order to survive and pay the bills.” (08:11)
• Weezy pushes back, saying normalization of “keeping up” is often an excuse, challenging the mentality: “Just get up off your ass and go to work.” (09:46)

3. Valentine’s Day Realness and Performative Relationships

(11:10 – 16:11)

• Weezy expresses cynicism about “over-the-top” Valentine’s Day displays on social media.
• Weezy: “This is coming from someone that has a boyfriend. And I’m not being a hater, okay? ...You bitches ain’t happy like that.” (11:17, 11:25)
• Both hosts critique performativity and inauthenticity online: “Social media just doesn’t feel real. When you see a happy couple, you actually can sometimes feel the energy in the photo.” (Weezy, 12:54)
• Single women’s beauty, success, and the shortage of “dateable” men spark a discussion on societal shifts and standards.

4. Listener Letter: Navigating Non-Monogamy, Boundaries, and Accidental Parenthood

(18:17 – 34:57)

The Dilemma

A listener outlines her four-year non-monogamous relationship:

• She has three kids from previous relationships, he has one.
• One of his non-monogamous partners gets pregnant; she refuses abortion, leading to a new baby.
• The writer initially leaves, then comes back, but struggles with her partner’s changed priorities and her own feelings.

Hosts’ Perspective

• Check-ins and Boundaries:

  • Weezy: Emphasizes the importance of regular relationship check-ins (23:22), regardless of monogamy style.
  • “My nigga knows he wouldn’t be with me anymore if he got a bitch pregnant or brought home an STD or didn’t use condoms, right? ...That is cheating.” (22:20–23:22)

• Planning For Consequences

  • Mandy: Stresses the need for explicit talks about risks before opening up a relationship: “What happens if I bring home an STD, what happens if someone else gets pregnant… this needs to be a conversation.” (24:52)
  • Critiques the boyfriend for “not being responsible enough to wrap it up.”

• Fluid Bonding and Multiple Partners

  • The hosts discuss the delicacy of managing feelings, hierarchies, and boundaries among multiple partners, especially when “accidents” (pregnancies, STIs) occur.

• Memorable Quote:

  • Mandy: “That baby cannot go back into that woman pussy and just be, poof, gone. The baby is here. So you either find a way to be okay with this situation or get the hell outta there.” (34:22)
  • Weezy: “The one thing that you do know is that he didn’t respect you enough to wrap it the fuck up.” (34:57)

Key Advice:

• If boundaries are crossed in a non-monogamous situation, emotional work is required — but some lines (like new children) may simply be deal-breakers.
• As Mandii puts it: “If you’re not happy, you’re never gonna be happy.” (34:22)
• The hosts caution listeners to prepare for all eventualities early and honestly when designing open or non-monogamous relationships.

5. Lighthearted Moments & Tangents

• Banter about powerful men, celebrity “big dick” energy, and the fantasy of being chosen by the ultra-elite (31:32–33:47).
  • Weezy: “She said, you almost think his dick is in the way because that’s how the fuck the walk looks. It’s like this power…” (32:15)
• Playful guessing games about which famous men friends have slept with, peppered with jokes about boundaries and celebrity culture.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• Weezy: “I think every single job, you’re— yeah, highs and lows. But what I’m saying is, generally speaking, I’m happy with my job. Sometimes my job gets hard.” (05:21)
• Mandy: “Surviving is paying rent, putting a roof over the head, putting your child through a certain school... when they get to a certain part of life where they’re seeing this money, it’s why it’s so hard for women to leave the food and beverage industry... You’re used to this type of thing.” (08:57)
• Weezy: “Can you imagine if I went out and brought home something into this house and was that irresponsible and risked our relationship that much?” (23:28)
• Mandy (on the letter writer’s situation): “Resentment for literally a mistake or situation that literally cannot be changed... you either find a way to be okay with this situation or get the hell outta there.” (34:22)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• Sex Work & “Happy Hoes” Debate: 00:55–09:46
• Valentine’s Day & Relationship Realness: 11:10–16:11
• Listener Letter—Question Introduced: 18:17
• Hosts’ Reaction, Boundaries, and Advice: 22:17–34:57

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Style, Tone, & Final Thoughts

• The hosts blend wisdom, candidness, and humor, ensuring their audience feels heard, seen, and challenged.
• They champion honest self-reflection, personal responsibility, and the necessity of open communication, especially in non-traditional partnerships.
• They keep it real with playful digs and expert-level banter—never shying from taboo or discomfort for the sake of community learning.

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For listeners navigating any flavor of non-traditional relationship, this episode is a must-hear for its grounded insights, laughter, and real-world guidance on decision-making and self-respect.

Transcript

[Weezy]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Mandy]

Guaranteed human.

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[Mandy]

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[Mandy]

Hey, hey, hey. Welcome to another episode of Horrible Decisions slash Mandy on the hotline. Weezy has to head to the airport soon. So I was like, well, you know, we could do half and half and.

[Weezy]

They might like this because the bitches.

[Mandy]

Need at least an hour, otherwise they is going to come for us.

[Weezy]

So I want to do a catch up on the pastor episode that y' all got to hear.

[Mandy]

Okay. So we sat with Apostle Dani, Danielle. And what are your thoughts on the episode? I love her story. I kind of want a part 2 if there is more to share, maybe just more detailed. I know Yomi was like, I have more questions. I had more questions. But also we went over an hour and we had dinner to get to. But I really like that format and I'm curious to know if y' all like that style of interviewing because even I would love us to get into more like couples. Like what you said about underbelly. I've told you I would love to get some more.

[Weezy]

I really have always wanted to just interview people with. Remember when you used to get into it? And I'd be like, so tell me about. You'd be like, I have it in the outline.

[Mandy]

What?

[Weezy]

You used to be like, I'm gonna get to it.

[Mandy]

Well, yeah, because we was. But also you. Back then, we were also debating on where we stuck to the outline because we know what our audience likes. But then you even at one point were like, let's just have the guests come for the last 20 minutes. So there was a.

[Weezy]

And it's hard too, because I just wanna know about the guest tea sometimes instead of including them in our thing that we have to do. Which was great about this one. Cause it could just be eyesight. Yeah.

[Mandy]

This one was like, we gonna listen and not judge.

[Weezy]

Um, but in the episode, y' all heard me going back and forth with the hoes happy thing.

[Mandy]

Yes.

[Weezy]

And there was a thought that came to my mind because I got home, and I was like, I have to tell you about this episode because I feel icky about this moment. I hope it didn't come across that way, because I wanted to challenge her on something. But you started crying.

[Mandy]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

And it wasn't.

[Mandy]

I mean, it's the. It was the hardest chapter in my book to write about.

[Weezy]

No, no. It was more about me saying it wasn't me trying to do that. After that moment, I had something I wanted to say. And then you were, like, feeling emotional, and I was like, fuck, now I can't bring this shit up.

[Mandy]

But you did.

[Weezy]

But I waited. I waited till.

[Mandy]

For a millisecond.

[Weezy]

No milliliter.

[Mandy]

I was like, bitch, I know you crying, and I'm so sorry you crying, but, bitch, I think hoes could be happy. Like, that's how that happened.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Like.

[Mandy]

No, you made sure to. You said. You said. Ooh, I hate that you emotional right now. Cause, bitch, I disagree with what you saying.

[Weezy]

You know why, though?

[Mandy]

Cause you wanted to keep the show going. I know. Oh, it was my theorist. I was just like. And I was like, why y' all arguing?

[Weezy]

I'm like, I really. I believe that her line of sex work is depressing. And that was really why I was like, all right, we'll stop for a second with the circumstance thing. And so basically, the reason I don't believe this is because I have homegirls that could turn to so much other work, and they don't, because they love it. They love the amount of money. They love the life it affords them. And at the end of the day, bitches, like, taking money from niggas sometimes. Like, if you get to live a.

[Mandy]

To me, the dating a nigga with money is different than laying on your back, literally, for money. Like, dating men with money is not equivalent to sex work. I feel like.

[Weezy]

I don't know if this is. I'm not even talking about dating, though, right? So here's really why.

[Mandy]

What was the conversation with your boyfriend, though? Because you said you brought it up to him.

[Weezy]

So. So I was like. I was like, yo. Oh, that's what I brought up. I was like. Mandy was getting emotional, and I felt bad because they were talking about a specific type of sex work in a moment in time, right? And I was like. And then I talked about my experience. I started telling him about how.

[Mandy]

I.

[Weezy]

Was like, I've definitely, like, been in situation on the Sugar Daddy's app, and I'm like, ugh, this sucks. I was like, but I can't tell you that I haven't had high high and low lows in other work and that I was choosing to do this shit with stability in my life. And it was because I liked it and I liked the money. And so it was important for me to bring up in that conversation, like, I was a happy ho. And I've been unhappy in other situations too. Like, he's like, right. But when we're talking about feeling emptiness, I'm like, I felt empty with niggas. Like, everything I've done in my life, Like, I can't tell you where there's not been a con to it. And I think.

[Mandy]

So then you actually agreed with her in that sense. No one's happy. So her saying, I don't know a happy prostitute is. You actually agree with her? There's a lot of people, highs and lows and unhappy prostitutes.

[Weezy]

I think every single job, you're. Yeah, highs and lows. But what I'm saying is, generally speaking, I'm happy with my job. Sometimes my job gets hard. I have moments, but whatever. So when you were like, oh, what about that time? And blah, blah, and I was like, that was a tough time. But, like, it wasn't enough to stop me. I've had tough day. You and I have had tough days. It wasn't for us to quit each other. So, like, to me, I don't even want to hear that. Like, you've never met a happy prostitute. Maybe you're talking to people that are really down and out, and that's why they turn to church. So maybe the people that come across your desk, you would.

[Mandy]

I would be so curious. Because what she said, I agree with. She said, when we sit here with porn stars or sex workers, we're celebrating them because we're pro sex work. However, a conversation with someone who could get more into their psyche about how they feel about the things that they do. I do agree that that conversation would probably sound night and day from when women are coming on here kind of promoting their platforms and what they're doing in the moment. I also think that there's a huge difference with talking to someone who did sex work and left it and is working through the feelings that they felt that they didn't know how to deal with. Like, me talking about. Or maybe that's what, like, made me cry. But literally listening and being triggered by my own feelings of not addressing how lonely or empty or how much I didn't want to do something. But I Did it because I needed to pay for school, or I needed to pay for my bills, or I needed food or. Those thoughts weren't in my mind during survival mode as much. But then when I got to being financially free, like being in a place of financial freedom where I don't have.

[Weezy]

To survive mode is the key of.

[Mandy]

But that's what you don't deal with.

[Weezy]

No, but that's why I was disagreeing. Screen. Your emotion that you experienced was operating in survival mode. Hers were, too. That's why I said there are some women that aren't doing this, but they.

[Mandy]

Have to pay their bills. I think women who choose to be sex workers are all in survival mode.

[Weezy]

Okay, for example, let's talk about creme de la creme prostitute making mad bread. The white girl from Australia that we had on. I forgot her name in the moment. She makes really fun content. I know for a fact, and I don't know the bitch, she could stop and live a nice life with the money she's made. Right? I know that this girl is making. Whether on OnlyFans, I believe it's over six figures almost, sometimes seven. She's talking about the amount for the clientele. So you're telling me now you could just do virtual shit, you know what I'm saying? Only exist there, but you still choose to do this. There is a high. Well, there's more money, of course, but that's what I'm saying. Like, she's not surviving. And that's why this thing is enjoyable.

[Mandy]

We just saw and look now. This is not a sports podcast. Sebastian Telfair and Odell Beckham Jr. Both just came out and talked about how $100 million wasn't enough. A million dollars a year during their career wasn't enough. The truth of the matter is the lifestyle and ways in which these women live know they cannot just stop and be good for the rest of their life. They have to keep doing this in order to continue to survive and pay the bills.

[Weezy]

But it's not survive when I say survive.

[Mandy]

Now, not to get into semantics, surviving is living. Paying bills is surviving. Eating food is surviving. So when I say survive, I'm not talking about the women that literally, oh, my God. Well, you know, I might have to shake a can because they don't have.

[Weezy]

But, but, but we have to talk surviving with them.

[Mandy]

Because that's the difference in surviving to me is especially when knowing some of these sex workers have kids. Surviving is paying rent, putting a roof over the head, putting your child through a certain school, and so to me, know these women, when they get to a certain part of life where they're seeing this money, it's why it's so hard for women. Let's take it out of sex work. It's why it's hard for so many people to leave the food and beverage industry. When you're a bartender or a bottle server or you're used to seeing quick cash, quick money, you're in a place where you couldn't imagine having to wait for a check. Because now you're used to this type of thing.

[Weezy]

Whatever you're used to, though, that to me is a fucking excuse. This is the same excuse to me as my friends that borrow money from me and have the ability to work more. I have a lot of people in my life now.

[Mandy]

She said, now you sound like Kim.

[Weezy]

K. No, no, no, no, no. I'm keeping it a buck right now.

[Mandy]

Just get up off your ass and go to work. Go to work. You just got a little taste of the horrible decisions Patreon. But why is that? There's tap in for the full, uncut and way nastier episodes over on patreon. Go to patreon.com horribledecisions and unlock all the messy tea wild stories and bonus content you won't hear anywhere else. And now here's yous've got Decision.

[Weezy]

If you would like to have us answer your questions. If you have a terrible job, a terrible boyfriend, or a terrible thruffle, guess what?

[Mandy]

You've got decisions. You've got decisions, baby. I do too.

[Weezy]

That's Jesus. If you listen to this week's episode.

[Mandy]

Oh, my goodness.

[Weezy]

God bless these hoes. Listen, I think she said it. I think it was a Freudian slip. It gave hoes and I was fine with it.

[Mandy]

Bertha, you. I say you got decisions and you say Jesus do too. It's kind of crazy.

[Weezy]

Jesus have decisions to make.

[Mandy]

Yeah, Jesus. Jesus make all of our decisions. Amen. Hallelujah, Gloria. Hallelujah. AKA Glorilla. Shout out to her and bro Rilla.

[Weezy]

Oh, my God, man.

[Mandy]

What?

[Weezy]

Bro Rilla.

[Mandy]

Bro Rilla, baby. I'm so sick of that stud being on my goddamn timeline.

[Weezy]

Trump's actually stick up on my timeline. So we're coming out of Valentine's Day week.

[Mandy]

We are. What you was think of what was.

[Weezy]

This is coming from someone that has a boyfriend. And I'm not being a hater, okay?

[Mandy]

You bitches ain't happy like that.

[Weezy]

Like bitch y' all really was doing a lot.

[Mandy]

I'm not gonna lie. You sound like a You sound like a hater. What do you mean, bro dog?

[Weezy]

I was like, I wasn't even trying to be cynical, but, like, we sitting on the couch, everybody was trying to, like, make us a nice itinerary for the day and all. And he's just like, no phone, baby. And I'm like, like, you know, you want your phone Saturday morning, I want a bed ride. So, girl, once I started looking, I'm just seeing all of these girls, some that I know, some that I just don't believe, that are just telling us about their Valentine. It's like 10 paragraphs. Oh, my God. To the point where it's either, you know when you have to say congratulations, or I'm sorry that happened to you. Like, it was just a lot, and it was not given what it's supposed to gave. I. I just find the intense dedication to somehow not be that authentic. I don't know why. And maybe it's because I've been so disappointed by men in the past.

[Mandy]

Okay.

[Weezy]

Right. But I just found it to be very phony. Like, I don't know. I think sometimes this crazy display of affection for a person that you were with one time, sometimes with or maybe like, you know, the pictures look good, so you want to post that. It does not feel very real to me sometimes. And I am maybe just getting to the age where social media just doesn't feel real. So knowing that you did this, huge.

[Mandy]

Devotion from social media.

[Weezy]

Yeah, that's how it feels like. I just. I don't know. When you see a happy couple, you actually can sometimes feel the energy in the photo. You fucking posting the Prada box or the Louis Vuitton box with this whole story for me. I just don't really believe you.

[Mandy]

Yeah. I kept my Valentine's Day gift on my story. I got diamonds. And if you guys want to hear the story of my Valentine's Day, we own it. Join us on Patreon for town hall. Town hall is taking place on Monday, February 23rd at 8pm Eastern Standard Time. That is for the $15 and up tiers only. So if you want to join in, baby, and hear my goddamn Valentine's Day, pull up on Monday. Go over to patreon.com backslash. Horrible decision now.

[Weezy]

Oh, can we still talk about. So I want to talk about the. That was outside on Valentine's Day real quick.

[Mandy]

I didn't know. Now I feel like I was. I was also. We.

[Weezy]

I didn't know was that, like, these girls was looking good. Okay, so. Oh, we spent most of Valentine's Day in bed, fucking and watching Love is Blind. But we had plans that night. Nice restaurant and, you know, whatever. Cool. We're going to Descendants that night. We're ready to party. We hung out with the other Gila and her husband. So we meet up at the Ace Hotel. I know the hoes go to the Ace Hotel like that. Okay. Okay. I walk in the door, I said, oh, some bitches in here. It was like, you know, like the corporate black girl.

[Mandy]

Bad crowd. Okay. That's what it was given. Okay.

[Weezy]

The girls, Mandy, they looked so good. Literally, my man was saying to me, he was like, I didn't think girls, single girls, gonna be out tonight like that. He's like, because they made it an R B for the lovers kind of thing.

[Mandy]

Yeah.

[Weezy]

Like, yo, this really goes to show you, there's a shortage of, like, men. That's how bad these bitches is.

[Mandy]

He's like, you're gay. They're in jail or they're married, bro.

[Weezy]

He texted two of his homeboys like, no, y' all niggas gotta pull up, come get these homies.

[Mandy]

Well, it's crazy, because even in Atlanta, my lash girl and my hair girl said that last week they was booked up, like, every motherfucking day. The girlies was making sure the nails, the hair, everything was laid. And I guess maybe the single girls, too.

[Weezy]

Yeah. Like. And here's the thing that it was really starting to hit me. There are so many beautiful women, single women in New York doing well.

[Mandy]

Can't say that about the niggas.

[Weezy]

But what is it? What is the real. Someone needs to do the science. And. And then we all start trying to.

[Mandy]

Talk about it, right?

[Weezy]

It is fun, actually. Funny. Two couples sitting across from each other at the spotlight. How the fuck does these bitches ain't. I don't even understand. Why are men passing them up? What is going on? And all I can think of is I really do think, and I'm not trying to shit on men here. I don't think they can handle dating these beautiful, successful women and be held accountable at the same time. Now, like, no, I've. Sorry. Two.

[Mandy]

One.

[Weezy]

One girl I was talking to just randomly in a photo booth line. Internal medicine. Another girl from the Whore hive, she was there with. With some of her gays, and she was like, oh, yeah, I'm an oncologist. I'm like, what the fuck?

[Mandy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, bitch.

[Weezy]

But also low key. Thought she had a BBL and was an IG model.

[Mandy]

So I'm confused. We are literally in the era of I can do bad by myself.

[Weezy]

Hello.

[Mandy]

So why the fuck would I get somebody else to make it better? No. No.

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[Mandy]

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[Mandy]

We're prohibited by law.

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[Weezy]

Listen, I have been waiting to promo this, okay? Y' all know I work with them. I have been waiting for this project to drop for years. They've worked so hard to make this. From the visionary creator, Kenya Barris. From Black Ish comes Big Age, the hilarious and heartwarming Audible original comedy about love, aging and finding your way into love's next chapter. Big Age stars comedy legends Jennifer Lewis, Cedric the Entertainer and Niecy Nash Betts. Big Age follows the recently retired couple Dot and Butch Watts reluctant relocation to their new Florida home, Sunset Gardens, which is a senior community. There's anything but relaxing and embarrasses retirement community. Dot and Butch encounter a parade of unforgettable personalities who push their 50 year marriage to the limit. There's Butch's flirtatious ex flame Ethel, who's Niecy Nash, spiritually possessed neighbors, pesky pill pushing couples and the ferociously competitive Steven Aider. Through its blend of outrageous comedy and touching revelations, Big Age explores what it means to grow older without growing old at heart. Listen to Kenya Barris new laugh out loud Audible original comedy Big Age. Big Age Age does funny things. Go to audible.com big age series to start listening today. Okay, so who fucked up now?

[Mandy]

Okay, now this is a really, really interesting story this week, Weezy. I'm going to start by just reading the title. We're non monogamous, but he made a baby with her. Okay, okay. Now don't you ask me what I would do, bitch baby. Oh, you know we gonna get that. Get rid of that. There's a lot of detail.

[Weezy]

Get rid of that.

[Mandy]

We can both put ourself in this scenario as we are both ethically non monogamous. Now if you wanna send your letter to get read by the by us or just get our non expert advice on what to do with your life because you've been fucking with us for that long. Send your questions, send your letters, send your dilemma over to decisionspodmail.com let's get into it because it's not that long, but she gave us some details. Here we go. Hello, ladies. I firstly want to say I love the POD and have been a listener since COVID I just love the empire that you two have created.

[Weezy]

Dick. By dick, that's cute.

[Mandy]

I mean brick by brick. Okay, now to the story. My boyfriend and I have been together four years.

[Weezy]

Okay.

[Mandy]

I have three children from two past relationships and he has one biological child from a previous marriage. I have absent fathers for my children and he has helped raise them as his own. And my youngest, who was two years old when we met, calls him dad. Before starting the relationship, we had many talks about our stances on monogamy and non traditional relationships. We both came in with an open mind and have tried different styles of relationships. Polygamy wasn't for me because I don't have an emotional attachment to women, so it would be nothing beneficial to me being in that dynamic. I'm fine with threesomes and I'm fine with having sex solo. I'm just not comfortable with forming relationships with others at the moment. Fast forward. One of the ladies he was fucking with gets pregnant. She turned down his offer to pay for an abortion. So he ultimately accepts that he is about to have another child.

[Weezy]

Hmm.

[Mandy]

At this point I told him have a great life and I didn't want to be a part of that. It's not like he cheated though. I just hated the fact that he was irresponsible and it's going to cause a dramatic change that I didn't have a choice in. I left and he was persistent about staying together. After a while of trying and communicating, we did get back together. But I was nervous about being stuck in a situation I was not going to be happy with. Fast forward. The child is here and is now seven months old. It was a very rocky journey because of course the child requires a lot of his time and the woman wanted it to become more of a serious relationship like after they have the baby. Him and I do live together and do day to day things together and and she wanted that. I don't know many women who wouldn't. So it took some time to get things regulated. I'm honestly ready to get back to lifestyle, but he's not on board and I think he's Scared he'll end up messing something up again. Honestly, I think having to only focus on him and his situation relationship wise is getting kind of aggravating and I'm ready to just get back out there. He has admitted he fears me leaving because his situation, but his insecurities aren't my issue. I think I'll leave him to be free before I leave him because of something he's responsible for. Oh, I forgot to mention that I did end up pregnant a few months ago, but decided to abort for many reasons including him just having a baby that same year. What are your thoughts? This is a lot because. Okay, what is it? Silly prizes or like what's the, what's the phrase about? You know what I mean?

[Weezy]

Okay, I have, I know what my, my main thought is right now.

[Mandy]

Okay.

[Weezy]

I'm like, my main thought in this moment is she said, I know he didn't cheat, but. And I think that we are not taking our boundaries very seriously. Like for example, some advice I would give to anybody that's in a monogamous relationship. My boyfriend and I have check ins on the 3rd of every month no matter what. We could be hungover, we could be in other cities, we could be busy with work. That's going to happen. And it's not always non monogamous. It's just that kind of was like the catapult catalyst. But maybe one of them could be like, yo, sometimes when you wake up in the morning, you're rude to me, you're not doing the dishes. It's, it's just whatever. It could be, right? More than anything, it's not about the, the, not the relationship itself or other people. It's always about like this is how I'm feeling about a boundary. This is a non negotiable boundary. This is a flexible thing for me. I'm going to be honest with you. My nigga knows he wouldn't be with me anymore if he got a bitch pregnant or brought home an STD or didn't use condoms, right? Same with me. Can you imagine if I went out and brought home something into this house and was that irresponsible and risked our relationship that much? So there is obviously a lot you have going on. You live with this person, you care about this person. It's not that easy to just leave. I get it, but I just don't like the notion of well, he didn't cheat. I'll say, I think that is cheating.

[Mandy]

I'll say you've been together with this man for four years. You live together, you have three kids that are not his. He has now two that are not yours. So the blended family is already there, unfortunately. And you just said you got, you terminated a pregnancy because he just welcomed this other child. Now I want to go back to kind of lean in more to what you were saying, Weezy. I think when it comes to lifestyle and non monogamy, the risks 100,000% outweigh the rewards in it. We know that sex, especially when there's not emotions and it's just a fun night out is a temporary high. And so the conversations when you get into an open relationship or non monogamous relationship need to be the discussion around the risks. So it needs to be what happens if I bring home an std? What happens if someone else gets pregnant? And for the men, if your partner is allowing you to, or I don't even like the word allow. If you guys have come to an agreement that you both can have outside partners, as a man, I think your other partners, that's where you need to do the due diligence in asking your other partners their family planning goals. Because if you are going to be fucking a bitch unprotected, the consequence is that they may end up pregnant. So the same way he was willing to throw her the $500 for the abortion and she didn't want to do that. If you are having unprotected sex with anybody, what, what happens if Needs to be a conversation, bro, there's so much.

[Weezy]

What happens if, like, there's so much we've had to have conversations about in my relationship of like, what happens if any of the external partners catch feelings?

[Mandy]

Like there's a lot of manage their.

[Weezy]

Feelings and reassure them that the other person's more important or do they get cut off. And unfortunately, because it's too messy cut.

[Mandy]

Like for some people or some people don't know how to navigate that. Because it is also difficult for you not to getting your feelings when you start liking another partner. I mean, we talk about the hierarchy. There is a hierarchy within polyamory that exists.

[Weezy]

Yeah.

[Mandy]

And it does become difficult assuring everyone's feelings and not, not hurting someone, but also if their feelings get hurt, reassuring them. It's a lot of work. And so for me with this, it's interesting. The baby is seven months old, you're back living with this man, but he has a situation that has left you inevitably because it's what you thought, unhappy. And so now the idea that you just want to get back out there, it's interesting. Because I'm not sure if you just want to go have sex with someone else or if you're looking for another partner because you've already said that you couldn't have multiple feelings for multiple people. And I don't know if you were only referring to women, but you seem to be not someone that can navigate a non monogamous relationship when feelings are involved. You clearly feel like you love this man, but this situation ain't cut out for you. I'm not gonna lie. Probably wouldn't bother me because I don't want kids. So even when I was talking to a guy, the conversation at one point was like, you could go have a baby with someone else, but I like and I would still be with you. Because if you want to be a father, you want to be a father and I don't want to be a mother.

[Weezy]

So the other thing too, the accountability that you believe your partner needs to have doesn't sound like, like you. It doesn't really seem like you're. You're holding him to a standard.

[Mandy]

Yeah, he shouldn't just be out here raw if his pull out game is weak. Like, that needs to be a conversation. And again, I agree. I think what sucks is we had.

[Weezy]

That, by the way, once.

[Mandy]

What?

[Weezy]

Fluid bonding with multiple people. And it was scissors and Beard bae and even that was a combo. Like, yeah, my girlfriend and I chose to fuck another nigga together. Right? And you think we.

[Mandy]

Well, I'm not gonna lie for the plot. If he got her pregnant, that would have been some good content.

[Weezy]

We talked about it all the time.

[Mandy]

That would have been great content for the plot.

[Weezy]

My mom wanted that to happen so bad. Like, but y' all gotta remember, right? We are in this world where our parents were like, we talking like that. Like, my mom used to be a delicate. I'll just take it any way I can get it. If we. If she's gotta have it and I have to, the baby gotta stay with me till it's five so y' all can go travel and explore, whatever you gotta do, you know? Like, that was really helpful.

[Mandy]

Mama made shit. I just told her, my little boo because she, she brought him up on the phone and I was like, oh, yeah, I know him. She's like, you know him, girl. She started looking up to see if he gonna be in Orlando. She's like, so that means I get tickets cause I like him.

[Weezy]

I mama's ain't shit.

[Mandy]

I'm like, damn, bitch, not you immediately going to search when he come to Orlando. So you could get tickets, bitch. Rude. I was like, what the fuck?

[Weezy]

But is it because I'm just playing.

[Mandy]

Here we go. Singer, ball player, politician. You know, who knows politician on a tour. I said when he's in Orlando, he could be at the. A Democratic convention or during the midterms.

[Weezy]

Okay, bitch. Fucking Barack.

[Mandy]

Listen, girl. That man was at. He was courtside at the motherfucking.

[Weezy]

Right?

[Mandy]

That's a farm, man.

[Weezy]

I know. I've never seen him up close, but I was watching a recent podcast interview with him and I was like, wow, he's.

[Mandy]

No, no, no, no. Even the way he walked it, like, okay, this is inappropriate because he's still our president. But he walked like his dick was big. His dick was a problem. You know what I mean? He just got a, like, cool little.

[Weezy]

Okay, okay.

[Mandy]

I just know it's his name.

[Weezy]

Let me tell you where that comes.

[Mandy]

Sorry, Michelle. Sorry, Michelle.

[Weezy]

I don't really think Barack is a cheater. Like, how could you ever be? But okay. This girl I know fucked one of the most famous men in the world. If we had to make a top five, you would say this name. And she.

[Mandy]

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Just because. Tell me if I'm right. If I had to name the top most famous people in the world, I'm.

[Weezy]

Not going to incriminate myself.

[Mandy]

Are they black or white?

[Weezy]

Black.

[Mandy]

Well, well, okay.

[Weezy]

Stop guessing. You could take on.

[Mandy]

I'm just going to say. I'm going to say who I think, and I would love to hear y' all thoughts. I'm just gonna say who I think.

[Weezy]

Don't do it, because I don't top five.

[Mandy]

You don't have to. You don't have to confirm nor deny. You could plead the fifth. But the top five black people in the world, to me, which is crazy because most of them are married. Obama is up there. Jay Z is up there. LeBron James is up there. Floyd Mayweather and Michael Jordan. I think those. I might just be leaning too heavily into sports there. But those are. If I think now you're actually thinking.

[Weezy]

Of who's the most famous black. Oh, no. Well, wait, wait. Over Floyd. I feel like we could pick a Denzel.

[Mandy]

Denzel. We could put Denzel. We could put Denzel there. We could put. Okay, wait.

[Weezy]

I'mma text you who it is.

[Mandy]

Hold on. And Morgan Freeman. I'm sorry, bitch. What the fuck? He's been alive for a hundred years.

[Weezy]

You see the name I texted you? Let me see.

[Mandy]

Sorry.

[Weezy]

No, no, no. It's in our chat. In here.

[Mandy]

Oh, oh, okay. Okay, so anyway.

[Weezy]

Okay, so basically, this is what she said, and this is how I know Obama got that dick. He just got it on my car. She.

[Mandy]

By the way, the name is not Obama, y'. All.

[Weezy]

Oh, no, it's not. Sorry, sorry.

[Mandy]

It's not Obama. Let's clarify that.

[Weezy]

I found out she was fucking this nigga, and then I'm like, yo, bitch, you gotta get out there and start dating or whatever. And she's like, I fucked one of the most powerful men in the world. She said, do you think I could ever get another nigga and not compare him? She said, when he walks in a room, you almost think. And it's so crazy because you said this about Obama.

[Mandy]

No, I said this about Obama and Chris Brown.

[Weezy]

She said, you almost think his dick is in the way because that's how the fuck the walk looks. It's like this power. Everybody looks at you in the room. She's like, bro, I could be around a hundred niggas. They could be finer than him. And it doesn't even matter, because when you're at the peak of fucking billionaire money fame, she's like, it's so hard. And then when you got that man wanting you being on your date, call me this, that. She's like, even eating my pussy. She said sometimes I would lay back and be like, huh, who's better than me? And I was like, yo, I feel you, though.

[Mandy]

Well, I can name a couple people better than her, but I'm not gonna name anyone right now.

[Weezy]

Oh, like, there was.

[Mandy]

Yeah. Just wasn't gonna. Just wasn't gonna throw that out there.

[Weezy]

But I think that's the thing, right? When you know you have someone so powerful that, like, succumbed to you.

[Mandy]

I mean, I'm not gonna lie, Rock had a mistress.

[Weezy]

How would she feel?

[Mandy]

I ain't gonna hold you.

[Weezy]

Honestly, that nigga's risking everything.

[Mandy]

I ain't gonna hold you. I just had the opportunity to fuck somebody that I was like, wow, I wish you offered your dick to me 10 years ago. Cause I would have done it for the plot, but. But now I'm not just fucking people cause of who they are. Not after a week. I'm gonna tell you. No, I'm gonna tell you in the chat. Um, yeah, like, no, not doing it. Not even for the plot. Wasn't gonna do it. Yeah, I know.

[Weezy]

Was that your first?

[Mandy]

It would have been, but I was.

[Weezy]

Like, wait, oh, oh, you didn't.

[Mandy]

No, I didn't. I didn't do it. I didn't do it. And so I was like 10 years ago. I would have. I would have done it just because. Yeah, no, I just googled his heist.

[Weezy]

Oh, five nine. That's why you didn't fuck with me.

[Mandy]

Yeah, no, he's not. You love giving details about. I can't give details, but shit. But you love niggas about to sit here and ain't no way they gonna.

[Weezy]

Get that one, Mandy.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

Ain't no way.

[Mandy]

Because majority of the country is 5, 9. Anyways, my advice to you is to really sit with yourself and what your boundaries are. If you're not happy, you're never gonna be happy. And I would never tell anyone to stay in a relationship where they could just grow resentment for literally a mistake or situation that literally cannot be changed. That baby cannot go back into that woman pussy and just be poof, gone. The baby is here. So you either find a way to be okay with this situation or get the hell outta there.

[Weezy]

The one thing that you do know is that he didn't respect you enough to wrap it the fuck up.

[Mandy]

And he may should have been wrapping it up again. He should have been wrapping it up. Anyways, if you want to get our unofficial expert advice on whatever the hell you got going on, because baby, we ain't had this happen to us. Okay. But if you want our advice on what you should do in a dilemma, head on over to your email and write us decisions pod gmail dot com. And also if you want to see this full video, head on over to our patreon patreon.com Horrible decision.

[Weezy]

Bye. Anyway guys.

[Mandy]

Hey guys.

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[Mandy]

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[Mandy]

We're prohibited by law.

[Sponsor/Announcer]

18 terms and conditions do apply. Join thousands of players on legendswithaz.com today.

[Weezy]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[Mandy]

Guaranteed Human.