B (4:17)

I'm starving.

C (4:18)

Me, too.

B (4:19)

Are you?

A (4:20)

Yeah, I am.

B (4:20)

What's this? Like a. I don't know. It's like, I just.

C (4:24)

It's like Tom Daly went into your closet and, like, found your jersey.

B (4:29)

I wish Tom Daly was in my closet. I go where they tell me to go. That's so cute. I do what they say.

C (4:36)

Did someone put you in this?

B (4:38)

Yeah. Cute. Thanks.

C (4:40)

Are you, like, on a press day?

A (4:41)

We get it.

B (4:42)

You do theater. Yeah, I knew. Yeah, I knew you were going to say that, and I knew you were.

C (4:48)

Going to get to that.

B (4:49)

Go there. All right.

C (4:52)

Not only this, but, like, when I was. When I was working at the National, I, like, went to the gift shops. I was like, I want a national T shirt.

B (4:57)

Yeah.

C (4:58)

And they were all, like, cheesy, like, for, like, you know, the civilians. And I was like, no, I want one that.

B (5:03)

Here's what we're Gonna do. Here's what we're gonna do.

C (5:05)

Because, like, all the staff had these, like, really just, like, simple T shirts. I was like, I want that.

B (5:09)

Yeah.

C (5:09)

And so they had to, like, go into their. Like, the department that, like, you know, like, PR or whatever, like HR and, like, what, you know, they had to find the shirts that they give to people. People when they're hired for the national. Like, this is, like, what the crew guys wore. Yeah, this is cool.

B (5:22)

Yeah. That's way cooler than.

C (5:24)

It's like, when we worked at the Delacorte. I always wanted the shirts that the ushers wore. I didn't want the ones that were on sale for the public.

B (5:32)

Yeah. With the crazy graphic that's like.

C (5:34)

Yeah. You know, like a Shakespeare head with flames coming out of it saying, love and light. And it's like. Because it's, you know, Winter's Tale and Hamlet together.

B (5:47)

No, it's too much.

C (5:48)

No, it's too much.

B (5:50)

My aunt lived in Chicago for a while, and she begged me every break, like Easter break, winter break, to come visit her. And I was in, like, high school. I had no interest in going to visit my aunt on, you know, time off from school. And finally I was like, if you take me to the Steppenwolf Theater and you buy me a sweatshirt, I will come visit you in Chicago. By golly, she did it.

C (6:18)

I mean, I've never seen actually. I've never actually seen anything at Steppenwolf. I've seen them, those productions when they come in.

B (6:24)

Yeah, yeah.

C (6:25)

New York. But.

B (6:26)

Yeah. Which they frequently do.

C (6:28)

But they frequently do. You've worked at Stepping off, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And Micah's play was in step one. That's on now. Right.

B (6:35)

I hear it's great.

C (6:36)

By the way, have you seen it?

B (6:37)

Are you going to get to see it?

C (6:38)

I want to.

B (6:38)

I'm going to see it on Thursday. Oh, good.

C (6:42)

I hope I can see it.

B (6:44)

I hope you can, too. I think it's going to be around for a minute, so. I mean, they're supposed to go through February, so do you have. I'm sure you'll be back there before then.

C (6:52)

I'm. I'm in. I'm in New York almost every week for different things, but, like, every weekend. Yeah. For short, little things.

B (6:58)

Oh, my God. That's a lot of.

C (6:59)

It's a lot of back and forth. But I have to do it because of the kids. I would just stay there if I didn't have children.

B (7:05)

Yeah. Like, you're coming back here because they're Here? You mean you're not going there for them?

C (7:10)

No, they're here.

B (7:11)

They got a show.

C (7:13)

Yeah, yeah, no, they're here. They're staying here.

B (7:16)

Yeah.

C (7:17)

Wait, did you see at my birthday party, which is the last time I saw.

B (7:20)

You saw it all.

C (7:21)

You saw it all. Did you see when my son Sully fell and Joshua Jackson scooped him up and, like, held him?

B (7:27)

I heard when your son. Because it was like only a kid's skull on the ground makes that sound. It's like a sound that shouldn't exist in the world. It's so scary. Yeah.

C (7:41)

And he scooped him up and then. Did you know that he ended up then peeing on Joshua Jackson.

A (7:48)

As he.

C (7:49)

Was handing him back to Justin? Yeah, he, like. So he left a huge wet spot on Josh's shirt and then continued. Yeah.

B (7:59)

If I felt like that, I would have pissed myself, too.

C (8:01)

Yeah.

B (8:02)

I mean, it takes, honestly, less than that.

C (8:05)

I know.

B (8:07)

Oh, my God.

C (8:07)

The best part of it was, like, so many people came up to me afterwards. I was like, well, I'm going to fall next if this is what's happening.

B (8:13)

If Josh is falling to the arms.

C (8:15)

Allowing us to pee on him.

B (8:16)

Yeah. Yeah. There's also, like. Don't you remember as a kid? I feel like I saw him. It's so scary, obviously. But then when everybody else is flocking to you and, like, making a big thing of it, it kind of scares you. It's like, oh, something that's not supposed to happen happened. Yeah, I feel like that was what was going on, too. No, for sure, for sure.

C (8:43)

Did Abbott elementary do a big Halloween? I haven't caught up. Did they do a Halloween episode?

B (8:47)

Yeah. Yeah. This is our third in a row. We did a. Give the people what they want, you.

C (8:53)

Know, I mean, the Modern Family Halloween episodes, we always do so well.

B (8:57)

Did you guys do one every year or.

C (9:00)

I think we did about. We did six over the 11 years, but. Or maybe maybe seven. But, like, the first one we did was a big hit. And so we kind of realized that we needed to do something like that as often as possible, but also not every year. You know, like, withholding. Also. Withholding them.

B (9:18)

Yeah. I don't know why, but, like, it just sort of. I think because we. I mean, we have fewer characters than you guys did. Like, you had a lot. That would be a lot to stay invested in what each of those people wear. Right. For Halloween each year. But for some reason, it's felt like. Like something we gotta show up for that. And, like, Ava Fest. There are these. These like benchmarks, these like, touchstones that I feel like the show just wants to revisit.

C (9:49)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

B (9:50)

And Halloween is definitely one of them.

C (9:52)

But also like, I mean, I just was. I took my kids to school for their Halloween costume parade.

B (9:58)

Yeah.

C (9:58)

And you know, Halloween in, in schools is like a thing. And like watch, you know, seeing like the staff and the faculty get involved and like, I don't know, it's, it's. It wasn't like that when I was a kid, but it's certainly. That's like the culture we're in now. I think everyone has really embraced Halloween. And I had a Zoom meeting before this costume parade. And so I was getting on the meeting and Justin and Sully and I were all in the car because we zipped back at school and so we were just killing time. I was like, let me just hop on this zoom really quick. And I hopped on the Zoom and saw he's dressed as Darth Vader in the backseat. And I get on the Zoom and like the guy immediately he's like, I caught him in like the middle of some speech. He was talking about pornography. And Justin's like, we're gonna go ahead and hang outside. And he ended up going out. I missed half the Halloween costume parade. But like, the costumes were so creative. There's this one kid who was. He had just like a long sleeve black shirt on and a knit cap and he was holding the Mona Lisa.

B (11:06)

What are you gonna do, you know?

C (11:07)

He was like one of the Louvre burglars.

B (11:10)

Yeah.

C (11:11)

Another kid was like a vending machine.

B (11:12)

No idea what the Louvre is.

C (11:14)

No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah.

A (11:16)

A kid was a vending machine.

B (11:17)

Amazing. Anyway, yeah, they're kind of like. They are, I think particularly with Halloween, they're kind of like the secret weapon because you can just dress kids as funny things. And that's like a joke in and of itself. You don't even have to have any dialogue about it. It's like free. It's like bonus, bonus jokes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To dress everybody up.

C (11:39)

It was like a Bob Ross, like seeing kids like, as like weren't alive.

B (11:44)

When Bob Ross was.

C (11:45)

Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Love it so much.

A (11:51)

Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Chris tells me what it's like getting recognized more often after Abbott elementary. And we share experiences working on short lived television or shows that never even saw the light of day. Okay, be right back.

D (12:11)

Hey, it's Brooklyn Adams and I'm partnering with Abercrombie to tell you about the newest drop from their active brand. Your personal best YPB leggings are made with buttery, soft fabrics that hug you in all the right places and come in Abercrombie's viral Curve Love fit, designed to eliminate waist gap. Paired with sports bras and super soft sweatshirts, it's activewear that supports every part of my busy lifestyle and gives me my best butt ever. Head into the new year feeling your personal best. Shop Active by Abercrombie in the app, online and in stores. Olivia Culpo here to tell you all about the launch of the new Abercrombie spring denim collection. Made the way denim should feel. Their denim has always been a staple in my wardrobe and has a wide range of fits, styles and washes. Every jean is available in both their Classic fit and Viral Curve Love Shop in the app online and in stores.

A (13:14)

And we're back with more dinners on me.

C (13:17)

How do you do with people recognizing you on a higher level now? I mean, has that been tricky for you?

B (13:26)

It is. I feel like I've definitely got like, like one eye open to it now and I feel a little more self conscious, obviously, than I did. I don't, I don't walk to the bodega with like a tank top and sweatpants on anymore, but I'm still buying my own apples, you know, I'm still riding the subway. It's. It's truly beguiling how much you get recognized in New York, even with glasses and a hat and a mask on. On the train, people are like, so sorry to do this to you, but it's like, how did you know who I am?

C (14:09)

Well, I mean, because I have a. I love New York so much and I love taking public transportation. These are all things I still do. And I love riding a city bike actually in New York. So I'm really into that right now. But I, I remember having a very. In those first years of Modern Family when I would go back to New York and, you know, you're just, it's just by the nature of the city, you have more people around you and there's nowhere to really go. And here in la, you're in your cars and like, maybe someone at a stoplight waves to you or something. But that's kind of the extent of it. Unless you're like, you know, in a very crowded area or a mall. But in New York, there's no, there's no respite from that. Like you're always around people. And I had a really Tricky time finding comfort in this city that I love so much. It was a very hard. It was hard for me to reintegrate and redefine my relationship with the city. And the thing is, I didn't want to redefine. I wanted to still enjoy the city in the same ways that I always had. But I was dealing also with people knowing who I was and, like, not having the anonymity that I felt so secure having. And it was. It was tricky, and I feel like I've. I think a lot of just took time and me, like, kind of realizing it doesn't matter, you know?

B (15:31)

And.

C (15:33)

Who cares if someone's, like, looking at me from across the street and taking photos? But, like, yeah, it's. It's something I just had to sort of come to grips with. But it was a. It was a hard. It was a hard transition for me.

B (15:45)

Oh, yeah, it sucks. I mean, it's. I mean, for the most part, people are, like, so generous and so. Honestly graceful and cool, and it feels great to meet somebody who wants to tell you how much they like you. But. Yeah, it definitely feels like. Like a new layer.

C (16:16)

Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

B (16:20)

And like a. A champagne problem, but a problem nonetheless.

C (16:27)

Yeah, yeah. You said Tyler's directed, right? Do you think you would want to direct any of them?

B (16:34)

I'm not sure. I mean, there's something really. There's. There's definitely, like, creative license to be taken, and there's. I'm sure I would so enjoy, like, having done something like 80 episodes now, like, putting my take on that, having my fun with it, my spin. But. Yeah, but it's also, in a way, so kind of formulaic that. And my brain just doesn't really work like that. Like, I would much rather write an episode than direct an episode. Interesting. So I might do that. I've got a couple.

C (17:14)

That'd be incredible.

B (17:15)

Couple doozies up my seat. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure it would be.

C (17:20)

Are they Jacob centric?

B (17:21)

I'm sure. Of course. Of course they are.

C (17:26)

Well, offend this capsule episode that just follows Jacob. It's like one long story.

B (17:30)

Don't you guys want the week off? Yeah.

C (17:32)

Come on.

A (17:33)

Right?

C (17:34)

It's incredible. Yeah, I love that.

B (17:39)

I feel like that's reminding me. I remember you talking about that job that you had before Modern Family, the TV show that. Right.

C (17:54)

Was it the one about the hotel?

B (17:55)

The class.

C (17:56)

The class, yeah. Yeah, the class.

B (17:58)

Was that kind of your first TV thing?

C (18:02)

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

B (18:05)

I feel like I'm. I remember you talking about that. Because I also had a tv. A first TV job that went up in flames. Like, well, you guys got to do a season at least.

A (18:15)

We did a full season.

C (18:16)

Yeah.

B (18:17)

Yeah. What was yours?

C (18:18)

Was it the John Malkovich thing?

B (18:20)

No, no, that did go up in flames. But I can do you one better, which is we shot. My first TV job ever was a comedy for NBC, and they canceled it before we aired. So we shot a show.

C (18:38)

It got picked up.

B (18:39)

It got picked up, it got filmed, and then they were like, how many did you. Actually, we're good. I can't remember if it was like, five or six, but we were. We were well on our way. And I was like, oh, my God, that's heartbreaking. It was so many, so many years ago now, but I just remember being like, yeah, life. Life changes forever from here on out.

C (19:05)

Like, that is like, a real dose of reality with, like.

B (19:10)

Yeah, yeah. The roller coaster of it all.

C (19:12)

Who was in it?

A (19:13)

What was it about?

B (19:16)

It took place at a satellite radio station. It was a workplace comedy. It was a great idea, but not according to NBC.

A (19:27)

Oh, my God.

C (19:28)

It's crazy that they bought episodes and then just never aired them.

B (19:32)

Yeah. I mean, this was before streaming. This was before, like. Right.

C (19:38)

And so how old were you when that happened?

B (19:41)

You know, like, pilot season was a thing, and there was just much. I think there was a lot more turnover. You could kill your darlings in a way that, like, you can't now. And things are in development, I feel like, for so much longer now. I was not long out of school. I was probably 23. Yeah. But I remember I was thinking of that because I remember you talking about the class, and it's crazy that you, like, had such a big job like that, and then that wasn't even the big job. Like, the big job came after that big job, 100.

C (20:19)

I remember when it got canceled, I was like, well, that was. That was it. That was my TV opportunity. How do you get bigger than that? It's a great ensemble directed by James Burroughs for CBS. And, you know, we shot 19 episodes. And, like, it was critically, like, it did pretty well. It's a bit of a cult classic, if you ask me.

B (20:39)

Cool.

C (20:40)

But, yeah, I was like, well, that's it.

B (20:41)

I think there's no higher honor than being a cult classic.

A (20:44)

Right. Now for a quick break, but don't go away. I tell Chris about my very first time visiting New York City, and we get into who really has the best pizza, New York or la.

C (20:57)

Okay, be right back. New Year, same extra value meals at McDonald's. So now get two snack wraps plus fries and a medium soft drink for just $8 for limited time only.

A (21:13)

Prices and participation may vary.

C (21:15)

Prices may be higher in Hawaii, Alaska and California. And for delivery.

A (21:22)

And we're back with more dinners on me.

B (21:26)

I was never really a huge pizza pizza guy. Even in all these years living in New York. I don't. I don't crave it, I don't care for it. And Hot Take LA has really good pizza. Some of the best pizza I've ever had.

C (21:42)

When I was in New York this last summer, I. I was there for like two months and someone's like, have you had pizza yet? Like, my all. Because I had a lot of friends who were in town. Like, a lot of the cast was. Was coming in just for the play. It's like that, that was like, they would have pizza every single night. Because it's like New York pizza. It's something you gotta have while you're there. And I, I hadn't had any of it and I. And then for like, two weeks, I, like, had pizza almost every other day. Like, after, after my play. Yeah, I went to Joe's, I went to Bleecker Pizza. I mean, it's. It's so good there.

B (22:17)

I remember somebody telling me there's something like, there's, there's like. The number of businesses that are registered as pizzerias in the five boroughs is like. It would shock you. It's astronomical. There's like thousands of pizza places in New York. I'm pretty sure.

C (22:34)

I mean, I don't, I don't. It's funny because, like, my friend Todd, he was staying at Efren's house in, in, like, the Gramercy park area. And There was a 711 across the street, and there was literally like four pizza places around there. And he went to get pizza every night at 7:11.

B (22:58)

And you have to stop being friends with this person. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's hilarious.

C (23:03)

But it's funny because you're right, because there were so. There were so many pizzerias right around there. I was like, why are you. Why are you going to the 7 11? He's like, it's because he knew it because he's from LA. He's like, I know that 711 has pizza that I like.

B (23:15)

Yeah, I know what I'm gonna get when I go there.

C (23:17)

And I like it that it's on the roller right next to the hot dogs that are also on the roller. You know, I can get a slushie.

B (23:23)

The Roller where things go to die Yikers. Have you been to a 711 in Japan? No, it's a totally different experience.

C (23:34)

I mean, I feel like everything in Japan. I've never been to Japan, but my friends who have. Dan Levy goes to Japan a lot, and he's like, it's the. I mean, he loves it so much.

B (23:43)

Yeah.

C (23:43)

And he just says the.

B (23:45)

We got a lot figured out.

C (23:46)

The attention to detail with service is incredible there. But he says, like, every version of, you know, what we have here that they have is, like, so much better.

B (23:56)

Yeah.

C (23:56)

Why is the 711 better?

B (23:59)

They just have all this incredible, incredible fresh food, and it's, like, high quality. It's. Yeah, it just has a very different function in society than the Seven Elevens in the States.

C (24:11)

Fresh produce at Seven eleven.

B (24:14)

Wait, so you were in. So you were in Albuquerque? You were in Albuquerque, and you moved to New York when you were 17? Holy.

C (24:21)

I mean, I celebrated my 18th birthday, like, a month after I moved to New York, so I was just about to turn 18. Yeah. And I had come to New York the year before or two years before with my local community theater, and it was me and basically all of these. They were older women, literally all women, but, you know, like, blue hairs and me.

A (24:52)

And.

C (24:54)

That was my first time being exposed to New York. And I had always wanted. I knew that I wanted to go just because I knew that's where Broadway was and, like, where. If you want to become a professional theater actor, that's where you would go. But I had no realistic, like, relationship with the city. I just had this, like, idea in my head. And I went to New York with this group of, you know, local women from the community theater, and we had tickets to go see, like, Cats and fan the opera and what else was, like, the Guys and Dolls and, like, just, like, all the hits and Radio City Music hall tour, you know, it was like, six days, and we had, like, something, like two things a day. And we stayed at the Hotel Edison in the middle of Times Square. Oh, my God.

A (25:45)

I mean, I was just, like, immersed.

C (25:47)

In, like, Times Square, you know, Hell's Kitchen. And that's, like. Was my exposure to New York. I, like, wandered up to New York, to Central park once, but that's probably the farthest I went. So, like, for me, New York was just that, like, you know, the Coca Cola sign on, like, 47th Street.

B (26:03)

Theater district.

C (26:04)

Theater district, yeah. And I got myself a ticket to go see Falsettos. Like, I, like. I turned down one of my tickets for one of the other shows, like, I just didn't show up and I went to to the TKTS booth and got a ticket for Falsettos and that was the first Broadway show I ever saw.

A (26:23)

That was a little side dish from my conversation with Chris Perfetti. If you haven't heard our full conversation yet, make sure to check it out on Dinners On Me. This episode of Dinners On Me was recorded at Roberta's in Studio City, California. Next week on Dinners On Me. You know her from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Brooklyn, nine nine, New Girl, and so many more things. It's Mary Elizabeth Ellis. We'll get into her and her husband Charlie Day's humble beginnings raising a teenager in Hollywood and working with acclaimed director Paul Thomas Anderson. Dinners on Me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson. It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch. Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf. Sam Baer engineered this episode, Hansdale. She composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tameka Balance Kolasny and Justin Makita. I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.

E (27:30)

Did your laundry set finally give up? Fred's has you covered. Don't trust just anyone. Call your local appliance. Experts at Fred's Appliance enjoy unbeatable savings on all Samsung appliances. Whether looking for a new range, dishwasher or refrigerator, we have what you're looking for. Like this Samsung washer and dryer on sale for 5.99 each. A $900 savings on the pair. Fred's Appliance. We're local like you.