Side Dish: More with D'Arcy Carden

Summary

DINNER’S ON ME WITH JESSE TYLER FERGUSON
Side Dish: More with D’Arcy Carden (July 16, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this lively and candid “Side Dish” episode, host Jesse Tyler Ferguson shares a meal with acclaimed actress D’Arcy Carden (“The Good Place,” “Barry,” “Five Star Wedding”) at Wife and the Somm in Glassell Park, Los Angeles. The two reflect on D’Arcy's pandemic-era Emmy nomination, musings on the realities of show business, their shared NYC hustler years, and the evolution of breaking into the industry. Blending humor and vulnerability, they discuss the highs and lows that come with chasing your dreams in showbiz.

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Key Discussion Points

Emmy Nominations and Life Under COVID

• The “COVID Emmy” Experience

  • D’Arcy recalls her unique 2020 Emmy nomination for “The Good Place,” which occurred under pandemic restrictions:
    • Getting ready at home in Echo Park with her husband and their dog, wearing a Valentino gown and Adidas slides (03:09).
    • Emmy nominees were filmed from home, with masked camera crew briefly setting up and waiting outside (03:18).
    • The bittersweet realization: “That is not how you imagine your Emmy nomination happening.” (03:39, D’Arcy)
    • The absence of disappointment: “I really knew I wasn’t gonna get it. So there wasn’t like a huge disappointment. It was more just like, that was wild.” (06:39, D’Arcy)

• Personal Life Bleeding into Career Moments

  • D’Arcy shares an emotional memory associated with the Emmy night:
    • Her husband revealed after the ceremony that their nephew was in an accident, which became all she could think about afterward (06:54).
    • “So when I think about the Emmys day... I’m gonna cry... all I think about is...my nephew.” (07:28, D’Arcy)

Love for Shakespeare and New York Theater (12:01)

• Both D’Arcy and Jesse discuss the ongoing intimidation and joy of performing Shakespeare.

  • “Shakespeare still scares me every time...I really have to find the No Fear Shakespeare volume.” (12:06, Jesse)
  • D’Arcy expresses a wish to do Shakespeare in the Park: “I really want to do that. Do something. I mean, a Shakespeare in the park sounds like so much fun.” (12:52)

• Stories from New York

  • Recounting the legendary lines for free tickets and camping out overnight: “The line would be like five or six blocks long...people already in line for the next night.” (14:11, Jesse)
  • On memory and reality blurring thanks to improv and Internet culture: “I will adopt someone else’s experience as my own.” (15:10, D’Arcy)

NYC Hustle: Day Jobs, Roommates, and Relentless Auditions

• Nannying, Bartending & Survival Jobs (18:10)

  • Both worked as babysitters/nannies in Brooklyn Heights, D’Arcy intentionally scheduling with many families so she could duck out for auditions (19:46).
  • On juggling jobs: “It was like a hundred jobs a day...I love New York, but so much. Not even but I love New York. And it was like such a struggle.” (23:09, D’Arcy)

• Getting “Claimed”—Seeing Your Own on Stage & Screen

  • D’Arcy’s delight at seeing Jesse in “Spelling Bee” and later on TV: “You were incredible. The cast was so...special...a bunch of funny weirdos on stage gave me hope.” (21:33)
  • On “claiming” successful friends: “It almost felt like I claimed you, or it was like my friend was now on TV.” (23:03, D’Arcy)

• Lessons on Perseverance and Delusion (24:08)

  • Reflecting on how struggling actors justify their path: “There is like a little bit of confidence and like delusion or something where it’s like, well, this has to work out.” (24:28, D’Arcy)
  • Jesse paraphrases an old showbiz maxim: “If you don’t have to do this, then don’t.” (25:04)

Shifting Paths: Then vs. Now in Showbusiness

• Social Media’s Impact:

  • Comparing the pre-digital grind to today’s rise-via-Instagram: “There are some really talented people working who kind of fell into this through, like, Instagram.” (25:19, D’Arcy)
  • Wondering about new kinds of “struggle”: “Is that equivalent...to waiting in the line that you don’t get into even [for] the audition?” (26:05, D’Arcy)

• Overwhelming Competition in the Digital Age

  • “Now it’s like that times a million where...you can see the world here. You can see...your competition.” (27:07, D’Arcy)
  • Jesse laments the change: “I had no desire or even...I just never imagined myself being on television.” (28:07)

• Finding Community

  • “I gauged my success on what felt like a community of people that I felt comfortable around. And, like, now it does feel so much bigger...” (28:22, Jesse)
  • D’Arcy agrees, cherishing their “scrappy” improv roots and the sense of belonging found in theater and UCB.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I was in my home in Echo park with my dog and my husband wearing a Valentino dress and Adidas slides.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (03:09)
• “That is not how you imagine your Emmy nomination happening.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (03:39)
• “When I think about the Emmys day...all I think about is...my nephew...I was, like, distraught.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (07:28)
• “I will adopt someone else’s experience as my own. ...It’s not like I’m trying to get away with this. Like, I truly think it happened to me.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (15:10)
• “There is like a little bit of confidence and like delusion or something where it’s like, well, this has to work out.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (24:28)
• “If you don’t have to do this, then don’t.”
  — Jesse Tyler Ferguson (25:04)
• “Now it’s like that times a million where...you can see the world here. You can see...your competition.”
  — D’Arcy Carden (27:07)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00–01:54 — (Skip: Ads)
• 01:55 — Jesse welcomes D’Arcy and introduces main topics
• 02:43 — Discussion of 2020 COVID Emmy nominations
• 06:39 — D’Arcy shares her emotional Emmy night story
• 12:01 — Shakespeare talk: intimidation and nostalgia
• 13:42 — Memories of lining up for Shakespeare in the Park
• 15:10 — Memory vs. reality in improv/comedy life
• 16:22 — Favorite NYC neighborhoods and apartments
• 18:10 — Shared years hustling as nannies and bartenders
• 19:46 — D’Arcy’s “nanny defense” for audition flexibility
• 21:33 — “Spelling Bee,” UCB, and hopes for weirdo actors
• 24:08–24:47 — The necessary blend of confidence and delusion
• 25:04–25:19 — “If you don’t have to do this, don’t”—advice to new actors
• 26:05–27:07 — How the industry’s gatekeeping and access have changed
• 27:24–28:44 — Community, competition, and making peace with “your era”

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Tone and Style

This episode is filled with warmth, humility, and the unmistakable humor of two close friends who have lived the hustle and grown to appreciate both its absurdities and gifts. Vulnerability and honesty shine throughout, offering comfort to listeners navigating their own creative paths.

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Summary

This “Side Dish” conversation is a quintessential Dinner’s on Me meal: laughter, tears, confessions, and inspiration, all shared over excellent tuna tartar and fond memories. For anyone who’s ever juggled dreams and day jobs, D’Arcy’s and Jesse’s stories are a welcome reminder—you’re not alone, and sometimes “making it” is as much about community as it is about acclaim.

Transcript

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

This summer I'm in London performing in Jesus Christ Superstar at the London Palladium. I'm playing King Herod, which is a role I have never imagined I'd ever get to say I was playing.

[Darcy Carden]

But here we are.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

I'm having a lot of fun. What's interesting about being away for longer stretches of time is that after the excitement of the trip wears off, you start thinking about home. Not in a homesick way, just, you know, in a practical way. You realize your home is sitting there empty while you're off having this incredible experience somewhere else. And that's what got me thinking about listing space on Airbnb while you're away. Whether you're traveling for work, taking an extended vacation, or spending part of the summer somewhere else, it can be a great way to earn a little extra cash while you're gone. And if the idea of hosting feels like a lot to manage, Airbnb's co host network can help. You can partner with a local co host who can take care of the day to day details for you, like managing reservations, providing on site support, or even helping to style your home so that it's even more enticing for guests. This kind of specialized help makes lists listing your home on Airbnb feel a lot more manageable. So if you've got summer plans or you're playing King Herod in London, this could be a great time to get started. Find a co [e-mail] host no one knows pests like Orkin. And when your calendar is packed with pool parties, graduations, birthday parties, cookouts, you need an Orkin pro. They know how to stay one step ahead of pests so you can enjoy your summer schedule or Orkin Pros have been using this expertise and know how to make sure your summer plans go off without an itch for 125 years. Because they know nothing is more of a buzzkill than the buzz of pests. So if you've got a packed to do list this summer, just make sure to bring sunscreen. Orkin will do the rest. They'll help you get the most out of your backyard and keep almost all the unwanted guests away.

[Darcy Carden]

There's really nothing they can do about your neighbor Scott.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

You want to start enjoying your summer as soon as possible, and we want to keep the fun going until the leaves start to change. Ready to make the most of your summer? Visit orkin.com today for a free estimate. Hey, it's Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Here's a little side dish from this week's Episode of Dinners on Me. This week's guest is Darcy Carden, who you know from the Good Place, Barry and Peacock's five star wedding. We met a wife in the Somme in Glassell park in Los Angeles, and we talked about the odd jobs that paid the bills, finding her community through ucb and how success has change in some ways, hasn't changed the way she thinks about show business. We're jumping back into the conversation as Darcy looks back on her 2020 Emmy

[Darcy Carden]

nomination for her role as Janet in

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

the Good Place, a year when the Emmys were a little different.

[Darcy Carden]

You were nominated for an Emmy the year of COVID right?

Yes.

Tell me about that, because Dan Levy's a very good friend of mine, so I heard about his experience with Schitt's Creek and them being, like, in a weird.

Like, they were in, like, a restaurant right?

In maybe Canada.

God, it was such a weird.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Where were you?

[Darcy Carden]

I was in my home in Echo park with my dog and my husband wearing a Valentino dress and Adidas slides.

[Jason]

Wait a minute.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. Did they send a camera to you?

Yes, they sent a camera to us and like, a camera guy or two that were, like, setting it up with masks on and then, like, waited outside on our porch the whole time, if I remember correctly. It was so strange.

Yes.

And it was like, this is another one where I'm like, I'm so grateful and honored.

But that is not how you imagine you're an Emmy nomination happening.

It's something like in the moment, I never had the thought of, like, this sucks. I was like, I can't believe I'm nominated for an Emmy. It's only after that I've. That I've. That I've, like, come around to being like, oh, I got totally boned. Like, meaning I didn't get to experience the fun of the day.

And had you been to the Emmys?

I'd been to the Emmys before because

the show had been nominated for. Right.

But I hadn't been nominated. I hadn't been nominated. So it would have been fun.

Yeah, of course. I mean, it also. Yes, it would have been fun.

And there was, like, a zoom rehearsal, I want to say, but again, on the little monitor that they had set up in my house.

And so you're watching. Were you watching the Emmys or was it okay, and were you like, oh, my God, I had to clean off this table behind me?

No, the way you would do for, like, a zoom.

Right.

And Jason was, like, art decorating it. Meaning, of course, like, he made it Beautiful. He's like, we're gonna move this plant and put it here. It was like a little corner of our house. Oh, my God. And yeah, my, like, big 60 pound dog, like on my lap. You know what I mean? It was, in a way, so sweet.

Yes.

And special. But also, you know, would love another opportunity.

100%. Absolutely. But there is something crazy. Like, that was a one off, one off thing.

Totally.

So you are part of that year.

Totally. Which is like.

I mean, Dan also feels the same way. He's like, I can't believe that that's. That's so appropriate for our show. That was, like, under the radar for so long, the fact that we won

and that it was, like, historic. If I remember correctly, they won more than anyone ever had won so many Emmys. Sorry.

Yeah, no, no, no, they had. They had. And like, it was huge. It was huge. And he was like, I would love to, like, to like, maybe try that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I. I have a memory of like this little zoom. No, not zoom, but the monitor. A rehearsal before the Emmys just, I guess I don't know what it was like, but it was all my little category nominees, you know, Annie and, like, Betty Gilpin and all the women. And we were just sort of like in our pajamas or whatever, like, waving to each other, texting Betty under the table. Like, this is so insane.

So wild.

It just was very wild.

And when, you know, I mean, I lost five times. So when you. I know how this goes. So when you lose, but you're also just sitting at home already.

Yes.

Like, what's that moment after, like, when the guys come in and take the camera out of your house and then it's so that.

So funny. It is like. It's a laugh almost. You know what I mean? It's like this. It's like, what the hell there, you know, I really didn't think I was going to win. And I really mean that. You know, I did that, like, last minute panic. Write a speech like, the minute before, which my husband again, was like, you idiot. Like, do this an hour ago. Do this yesterday. But I was like, what if? Who do I know? But, you know, I really knew I wasn't gonna get it. But. So there wasn't like a huge disappointment.

Right.

It was more just like, that was wild. And I'm gonna tell you something that I don't need to tell you, but I'm just going to. And we can cut it if you want to, but this was an especially weird day because this is sad. But ultimately okay.

Okay.

God, why am I doing this?

No, tell me my more.

After we. Yeah, after we. After the Emmys. Meaning after, like, we. The camera guys took the monitor away. My Jason had, like, tears in his eyes, and he's like, I have to tell you something. And I was like, what? And he was like, our nephew was in an accident, and it was like he had been sitting with this all day, and he was fine. He's fine, and he's thriving, and he's the coolest kid in the world. And this is years ago, but. But he didn't. He had been, like. You know, his energy was, like, so weird all day, and I was like, oh, he's more nervous than I am.

Right?

So when I think about the Emmys day, all I think about is. I'm gonna cry is thinking about my nephew, like. Like not knowing what was gonna happen. And it's such a weird. Like, when you say, what was it like after? I'm like, I don't even remember. Because I was like. Yeah. I mean, beyond thinking about it. I was, like, distraught.

Oh, my God.

It was one of those nights where you don't know which way it's gonna go.

Oh, God, how. That's so heavy.

So heavy. So heavy.

God. And you're sitting in a Valentina dress.

I know, I know. And it just was like, you know, people are texting and, like, that was fun. And I'm like, this is just, like, the crazy. It just was crazy.

He needed to get that off his chest. And, like, this was like, okay, we've had this moment.

Yeah. It was really.

I'm glad he's okay.

He's so okay. But it was, you know, it was not great. But my family. My husband's family is in Virginia, and we rented an RV and drove there after. It was like. And then we stayed there for, like, a month. It was. It was really great. It was, like, hard and sad, but he. But it was so. To have, like, that Covid time where.

Yeah.

You know, we had nothing to do.

Yes.

It was pretty like. Like amazing.

Those big life moments actually could. We could put our attention on them.

Truly. It was, like, very special. Yeah. Now he's doing great. Oh, my God. It's like.

That is wild. What a crazy sequence of events.

I know, I know, I know, I know.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Now for a quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Darcy and I talk about Shakespeare, New York theater, and the unforgettable years we both spent hustling and juggling auditions and day jobs. Okay. Be right back. Sometimes we know something feels off, but it's hard to know what kind of help we actually need. Therapy can be incredibly valuable, but for some people, it isn't the whole answer. That's where Talk Iatry comes in to ATRY is a 100% online psychiatry practice that provides comprehensive evaluations, diagnosis and ongoing medical management for conditions like adhd, anxiety, depression and more. Unlike therapy only platforms, Tochiatry is psychiatry. You're seeing a medical provider who can diagnose mental health conditions and prescribe medication when it's appropriate. It's more than 800 clinicians, except major insurers, so you can use your existing insurance instead of paying monthly subscriptions or out of network costs. You'll meet with a licensed psychiatrist who takes the time to understand what's going on, builds a personalized treatment plan, and supports you over time with consistent evidence based care. And because you're continuing to see the same provider, you're not starting over every visit. Your treatment can evolve with you so you're actually making progress over time. Getting started takes just a few minutes. Complete a short online assessment, get matched with clinicians who fit your needs and schedule your first visit in days, not months. More than 300,000 patients have already found high quality psychiatric care through toxiatry. Head to tokiatry.com jtf to complete a short assessment and get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes. That's tochiatry.com JTF to get matched in minutes. T-A-L-K-I-A-T-R-Y.com JTF. You know those meals that just immediately take you somewhere? Like, you take one bite and suddenly you're transported to a backyard, someone's manning the fryer and everyone's waiting for a taste. That's exactly what Boar's Head has managed to do. But at your deli counter. New from Boar's Head, the fryer's turkey breast has the taste of deep fried turkey. And I mean, it's perfectly seasoned. That golden, savory flavor, it really does that thing. One bite kind of takes over and you're like, oh, okay, this is what we're doing now. And the best part is you don't have to host anything, you don't have to fry anything. You don't have to politely ask someone else to handle the hot oil, which frankly, I'm always happy to avoid. It's just there at the deli, ready to go. So if you're putting together a sandwich or just standing at the Counter deciding what kind of day you're going to have. The Fryer's turkey breast is a pretty great choice. Discover the craftsmanship behind every bite at your local Boar's Head deli. Counter. Boar's Head. Committed to crafts since 1905. And we're back with more dinners on me. You, like, studied Shakespeare, right?

[Darcy Carden]

And I haven't done one in so, so long that that would be very scary in a good way.

Yeah. Shakespeare still scares me every time. I, I, I have done many, and I don't know Shakespeare at all. Like, I really. I have to find the no Fear Shakespeare volume, like, where, like, dummies down the language. And I have to spend a lot of time with it before the first day of rehearsal so that I can look, so I can even join the conversation.

Yes.

I mean, it really. I have to do a lot of homework, and I now realize a lot of people do that and have to do that, and look what I found.

Totally.

But every time I'm cast into Shakespeare, I'm like, this is gonna be the one where they, like, where they know he's actually not very good at.

Totally, totally. No, but I keep getting.

Yeah, yeah.

I really want to do that. Do something. Do something. I mean, a Shakespeare in the park sounds like so much fun.

It's the greatest thing.

I really want to do that.

Yeah. Have you seen Shakespeare in the Park?

I have. Do you remember I saw something a couple years ago, I think. I feel like it was Hamlet, but then it could have been Macbeth, because sometimes those get mixed. Wait, let me just think. It was. It was Hamlet. It was Hamlet.

It was Hamlet.

Yeah, but that might be the only thing I've seen how.

I mean, it's not. They don't make it easy.

You're totally right. And when I lived in New York for 10 years. Well, it's free, right?

It is free, which is why I

make sure I can't blame it on.

But you have to wait because it's free. People wait out in line for. You know, I think sometimes the day.

Yes.

I remember when we were doing Twelfth Night last summer. You know, it was with Lupita Nyong' o and Sandra oh and Peter Dinklage, and the reviews were glorious. It's like by the end of the run, people were waiting out in line, and we would leave the evening show and we would see people already in line for the next night, and they would camp out. They would camp out on the street.

Oh, wait. Because they're not allowed to go in yet.

They're not allowed to go in yet until the next morning. So the line would be like five or six blocks long.

Oh, my God.

Then in the morning they would all file in and sometimes the people at the end of that line would not get tickets and they would start the

line for the next ticket, if not tomorrow.

That is commitment.

I have like a memory. Maybe. God, I have a memory.

[Jason]

Maybe there.

[Darcy Carden]

It's either. It either was a story I heard, I did it myself, or I watched a documentary.

That's one of those three.

Yes. Where like people are waiting in line outside of the park. And then the second you're allowed to go in, there's just like kind of speed walking to the front of the line. Like you have to stay in line the same way you were.

Right. Well, I think they get. Now, I don't know how they did it back then or in your dream or in this documentaries, but they now give, I think, tickets to people so that there's like, they can leave and come back and they have their voucher.

Do you think that maybe because of the Internet and Instagram and everything that, like, our memories are sort of like what is real and what is a memory? What happened to me and what did I watch?

I will adopt someone else's experience as my own.

Yes. That's scary.

It is scary. And I will truly. It's not like I'm trying to get away with this. Like, I truly think it happened to me.

It happened to me. I. When I. Okay, I moved to New York to do theater, but fell in love with improv. So my life in New York was doing improv shows at ucb. And that is when this was the weirdest is because I would be doing, I don't know, 10 to 100 different characters and scenes a night. And then I would be like, did that. I would have a memory of something that happened and then I would be like, that was in a show last night. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like that. That was not a real thing.

That wasn't a real thing.

That was the. The thing that I'm thinking of was something that was made up in an improv show last night.

That happens to me more and more. And I don't. I don't know, maybe it is something that. The way that we're consuming information too much, too much, too fast, too much, too fast too. Not being able to put like context experiences sort of just like taking it all in and like filing it away 100%.

Yeah, it's bad.

Or dementia.

Yeah, one of the two or just

old age, young age. Young, old age.

Such young, old age. I'm loving this food.

This is very special, this tuna tartar. So you lived in New York for 10 years. What. What neighborhood did you live in?

I lived mostly. I mean, I lived in a lot of neighborhoods.

Me, too.

Longest was Hell's Kitchen in Brooklyn Heights.

Brooklyn Heights. Whoa. Fancy.

But not, like, in a one bedroom.

Still.

And even still, like, the other day, I was talking to Jason, I was like, how did we get that apartment? It was, like. It wasn't nice, but it was in a. Gorgeous. It was. It was in, like, a. It was on a street that was one block away from the water and had, like, like fire street lights. Do you know what I'm talking about? Flame.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So beautiful.

Like, did a little guy, like, in a. In a. In a long, over, like, like, nightgown,

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

light it every night?

[Darcy Carden]

We loved him, but I was asking Jason about that, and he was like. He was like, our landlord hated us because we had somehow gotten a great deal, and she was just like, get out of here.

Get out of the couch.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Now for another quick break, but don't go away. When we come back, Darcy and I look back on our years as nannies in New York, and we discuss whether breaking into the business is any different today than it was when the two of us got our start. And okay, be right back.

[Darcy Carden]

Introducing Meta glasses. You have questions. They've got answers.

Hey, Meta, what's the capital of Peru?

Lima. How do you say where's the restroom in Spanish? Donde esta Alvano? Hey, Meta, Is a hot dog a sandwich? Technically, no. Spiritually, yes.

Hey, Meta, what should I do with my life?

That's one of life's biggest questions. What do you think? Ask anything with the new Meta glasses,

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And we're back with more dinners on me.

[Darcy Carden]

I know we shared this in common, too. I babysat exclusively in Brooklyn Heights, so I know those parks very well.

Totally.

Yeah.

Yeah. Brooklyn Heights is great. You babysitter set exclusively.

Yeah. And was that, like, three different families?

Okay. Okay. That's so funny.

No, I, I, I don't know how I actually ended up getting a bartender as an actor. Like, I was just, like, looking for anything that I'm sure you had the same experience, but, like, I was doing, like, retail. I never waited tables in New York, but I did retail, and I was a bartender at a Broadway theater, and I was just needed. I needed cats. That's right. And I needed. I needed money. So I. I think it was an actor Friend of mine. That's right. His name's Alex. Alex Draper. And he was like, well, we could definitely use help. And now, as a parent, I totally understand this. God. Anyone who looks normal and, like, will, like, entertain my. Like, come on in, help out, like, join. Join the payroll.

But isn't that. Wait, keep going.

So anyway, I started working with him and his daughter Nora, who I think I ran into them, like, I don't know. I feel like six years ago. And she's a full dog. Yeah.

Was really weird. Yeah.

And then I got. I was with Nora at the playground,

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

and I got poached by another family

[Darcy Carden]

that didn't know them, that did know

he's a screenwriter, Billy. And. And his wife was. They were incredible. And, like, if for a while, like, it was like both the families, like, shared me happily, but then it was like, you know, they would, like, one would need me, and then the other one would be like, well, I'm with the other family, and they kind of

get a little, you know.

And now I'm experiencing this as a parent, I bet. Totally.

You're, like, you're mine.

Yeah, absolutely.

I need you to make a commitment.

Exactly.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Contract.

[Darcy Carden]

This was like, when I was a babysitter in New York, my move was, like, to have a bunch of families so that nobody could count on me, so that if an audition or a show came up, I could just bail.

Right.

If I was somebody's every day, then I wouldn't be able to go to an audition. But If I had 10 different families, then I could always say, I'm busy that day. And, you know.

Yeah.

Which worked really well for a really long time until I fell in love with, like, one family and then completely uprooted my. Not uprooted, Kind of uprooted my life, because I was just like, I'll do anything for her. Yeah, she's mine.

Yeah.

You know.

No, that's kind of how. I mean, I. I love both of the families that I worked with, and then there was a third family that I kind of worked with a little bit. But I remember because they were all in. Involved in the industry, and I remember them coming to see, like, my little shows off Broadway and.

So proud.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

So proud.

[Darcy Carden]

They were so sweet. And I also remember one of the guys that. Billy, who was one of the fathers of one of the families, he is a screenwriter, as I said, and he was writing something, and I was kind of like, are you gonna let me audition for. And it was sort of, like, weird for him, I think, to, like, also, you Know, he wanted me to stay in my job that I had because I was actually helping him do his job. So, you know, there was that weird thing of, like, oh, well, do I extend an audition to the babysitter? And then I remember during that time, I got an audition for Spamalot, and then spelling bee happened, and so, like, I ended up having to leave them anyway.

But for set. They must have been so proud of you.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

They were.

[Darcy Carden]

I think spelling bee was my introduction to you.

Was it?

Yeah. So what I want to say, like, 2002 or 3.

That's correct. Yeah. Yeah.

And it was. It was, like, mind blowing.

Like, you were a musical theater person and you like improv that shows right up your alley.

And you were incredible. And the cast was so. It was really, like, a very special show.

It was. Yeah.

Especially, like, I think I'd been in New York for. For a year, and things were, like, not going great. I was having a great time, but it's not like I wasn't on Broadway. You know what I mean? I wasn't. I wasn't. It certainly wasn't, like, easy. And then kind of seeing, like, a bunch of funny weirdos on stage gave me a lot of hope. Do you know what I mean? Where I was like, okay, there's a place for me.

Right. And also that it was created from such scrappy roots.

Totally.

Which, you know, with ucb, I mean, it was the same spirit that spelling bee was created.

You know, there's a funny thing, like, spelling bee could have been a show at uc. A really good show at ucb. Like, you know, Gutenberg.

Yes.

A couple years ago, was on Broadway, came from the depths of the UCB stage, and it was just as good there. So it was very, like, inspiring to kind of see where, like, musical theater was going. It was really exciting, and you were just incredible. You really, really were. And then it was. Was like, this is so funny. I think in my mind, you went from spelling bee straight into the class.

Yes.

Is that right? I did, because I just remember being like, my guy. He's mine.

That's so fun about Kristen Bell, because I knew her from musical theater, and then all of a sudden, she was like Veronica Mars on a billboard.

That's mine.

Yeah, she's one of me.

It almost felt like I claimed you, or it was like my friend was now on tv.

Sweet. I love that.

Thinking back on your bartending and your babysitting, I was the same way. It was like a hundred jobs a day. You know what I mean? I feel like I would leave my apartment at six in the morning with a house on my back of audition clothes and a change for this job and maybe a little blazer for this job. And then I had a show that night. Whatever it was, it was. It was like, I love New York, but so much. Not even. But I love New York. And it was like such a struggle.

It's such a struggle. I don't know how I did it.

Me too.

I wonder if it had been. Would have been easier for me to struggle in la.

I. Why do I do it?

I don't know the answer, I think. I mean, it seems just like it's an easier. Like the weather is better. You can have a car.

You can have a car.

These are also things that you have to pay for, not the.

It does feel like New York is like set up for struggling somehow.

Yes.

You know what I mean?

Yeah. I mean, when I look back at like, what I did to survive and how I survived, I'm like, wow. I really must have had so much confidence in myself because you can't be in that circumstance being like, this is going to be my life for a long time.

Totally, totally.

I mean, the apartments I lived in, the roommates. The roommates, the, the like.

And the jobs, the millions of jobs and the zero dollars and. And just like, no. Knowing it couldn't be like this forever. Yeah. There is like a little bit of confidence and like delusion or something where it's like, well, this has to work out. I was. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, I wonder what that is.

I think it is. I mean, I talk about this with, with actors all the time and I just had Ann Dowd on yesterday. I love her so much.

Wait, is she in town?

She was, yeah. Press for the Testaments.

We did Handmaid's Tale together and we

got a lot of stuff. Yeah, no, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's great.

I love her.

But we were talking about how young actors. I was like, I always say, like, if you don't have to do this, then don't.

And I remember like a professor saying that to the class and taking it in, like, really being like, okay, this is.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

It goes far.

[Darcy Carden]

And also even to say it out loud, but there is something to that. It feels like you have to really have a passion. But then I look at other people and things are certainly different now with social media, but, like, there are some really talented people working who like, kind of fell into this through, like, Instagram.

Yeah, that's true. I know. And they're super talented, very talented. And some aren't.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

But like, some true, like, full on, like, I mean, I'm thinking of a few people in my mind. Eva Victor, who did. Sorry, baby. A genius.

Yeah.

And really, like, the first time I saw them was on Instagram just doing like, front facing comedy.

I wonder, like, sometimes I think about that. Yeah. Like, did they struggle, like, or.

I know. Is that what. What is the equivalent of, like, Instagram? I'm doing this because it's like the kind of comedy that. What is. Is that equivalent? Not to be like, we had it harder. But, like, what is that like, compared to, like, waiting in the line that you don't get into even the audition? Like, cattle call.

Like, well, now people are putting themselves on tape and like, I, you know, people are finding like, little corners of their apartment and putting themselves to tape. And like, Lucas Gage went kind of viral during the pandemic for being demoralized on a Zoom audition. You know, this guy's like, making fun of his apartment, not realizing his microphone was on.

And like, what a moment. And he handled it so well.

He handled it so well.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

And he's also now like, you know, a big star.

[Darcy Carden]

So it's like, I don't know, it's wild.

I mean, I think there's. Yeah, I think. I don't wish I was struggling now. Does that make sense?

I was gonna ask you if you wish that you had started in an environment like this today, and I don't. Yeah, I kind of like how. I don't know if it sort of

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

feels like

[Darcy Carden]

another era. Truly.

It does. It like, you know, maybe this. I think we. Okay. You know that feeling when you walk in an audition room and you go like, oh, there are ten of me. Jesus Christ. You know, now it's like that times a million where you're kind of like, you can see the world here.

Yes.

And you can see. I don't know if it's like your competition. And this is so. Well, actually, this is actor specific, but this is also just like, person. This is just like, I have a dream, I have a hope, I have a want in my life. And now I can see that this person is doing it already. And maybe they're doing it better or they already got to it or whatever. And there's sort of like a. Like, we only could see what was in front of us.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Right.

[Darcy Carden]

Back in the day.

Right, right, right.

I don't know. I don't know. I think I would have been. It would have been easier for me to be to feel like it's already. I'm already out there in some other way.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

No, I agree with you. And I also, I feel, because I had no desire or even not desire, but like, I just never imagined myself being on television.

Yeah.

So for me, like, my gauge of success was like, the theater that was, like, playing in this, like, ultimately very small part of the world, even though New York's like, the greatest city in

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

the world, but it was a very, very small community.

[Darcy Carden]

So I kind of. I gauged my success on what felt like a community of people that I felt comfortable around. And, like, now it does feel so much bigger and I don't know, it's wild and I don't know how people are doing it now.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

That was a little more from my conversation with Darcy Cardin. If you haven't heard our full conversation yet, make sure to check it out on dinners. This episode of Dinners on Me was recorded at Wife and the Song in Glassell Park, Los Angeles next week. You know him from therapists viral tiktoks. It's the Internet sensation Jake Shane. We talk about the accidental video that changed his life and why validation is more complicated than people admit. Dinners on Me is a production of Sony Music Entertainment and a kid named Beckett Productions. It's hosted by me, Jesse Tyler Ferguson.

[Darcy Carden]

It's executive produced by me and Jonathan Hirsch.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Our showrunner is Joanna Clay. Our associate producer is Alyssa Midcalf. Sam Baer engineered this episode, Hansdale. She composed our theme music. Our head of production is Sammy Allison. Special thanks to Tameka Balance Kolasny and Justin Makita. I'm Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Join me next week.

[Jason]

Here at the Happiness Lab. We're serving up some hot takes for the summer. Big ideas that just might reshape how you think about your well being. Like the radical notion that we should get rid of small talk completely.

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

We talk about current events. We talk about what you do for a living, but not, do you love

[Darcy Carden]

what you do for a living?

[Jesse Tyler Ferguson]

Is this your dream job?

[Jason]

For more surprising ideas backed by psychological science, check out our new series, Happiness Hot Takes. Listen to the Happiness lab with me, Dr. Laurie Santos. Wherever you get your podcasts,