Firehouse Subs 2 with Brandie Posey

Summary

Doughboys: Firehouse Subs 2 with Brandie Posey (June 4, 2026) — Episode Summary

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Overview

Comedians Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger return to the firefighter-themed sandwich chain, Firehouse Subs, along with stand-up comic and Lady to Lady podcast host Brandie Posey. The hosts dissect the evolution—mostly decline—of Firehouse Subs since their first review years before, reflect on the insidious march of chain restaurant mediocrity, and, in classic Doughboys fashion, veer into tangents covering everything from milk habits to Renaissance Faires and the state of American comedy. This episode swings between nostalgia, low-effort sandwich critique, and Brandie’s tales from standup and her life in LA's mobile home community.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Firehouse Subs’ Backstory: Firefighters, Franchising & Decline

• Origin Story: Founded 1994 in Jacksonville, FL by firefighter brothers Chris and Robin Sorensen (“sub siblings”).
• Rapid Growth and Philanthropy: Expansion in 1999, now over 1,000 locations (with murals by Joe Puskas in each one); donations to firefighter charities.
• Corporate Takeover: Acquired by Restaurant Brands International (also owns Burger King) in 2021, which, according to the hosts, led to a drop in food quality.
• Declining Quality: Repeated comparison to Jersey Mike’s and Quiznos; consensus that Firehouse has slid in both taste and freshness.
  • “Jersey Mike’s just better—strictly better—than Firehouse.” (81:50, Mike)
  • “You compared it to Quiznos, and I would say we watched a similar slow slide into mediocrity with Quiznos.” (95:59, Mike)
• Sandwiches & Proteins Critiqued:
  • New grilled chicken described as “airport salad chicken” and “deeply processed.”
  • The steak in the steak and cheese melt was called “bad Steakums,” “chewy in a weird way.”
  • “That new grilled chicken is legit bad. Tastes like hospital food. And...the country is past stripped chicken breast. It’s over.” (123:01, Nick)

2. Brandie Posey's Comedy, Label, and Life in LA

• Comedy Label & Stand-Up: Brandie started Burn This Records to support non-coastal, artist-friendly, healthy “middle-class” comedy—standing in opposition to industry predation and right-wing shifts in stand-up.
  • “Large chunks of my industry are just welcoming fascism... So it’s important for me to take a stand and try to put people together I know are good.” (21:46, Brandie)
  • “Trying to work with people all around the country that are the pillars of their own stand-up scenes.” (20:47, Brandie)
• New Special ‘Milk Job’: Title inspired by her father’s habit of drinking four gallons of milk weekly, which began during COVID (18:01).
• Unique LA Living Situation: Brandie has lived happily for twelve years in an LA mobile home community:
  • “I bought my house in Los Angeles for $45,000...It’s like a really cool small community. Old people, young people, potlucks, Halloween contests.” (61:04)
  • Tales of eccentric but endearing neighbors, neighborhood deaths, and finding entertainment in pandemic-era hoarder clean-outs.

3. Food Tangents, Regional Memories & Renaissance Faire Lore

• Baltimore Roots: Brandie’s love of blue crab, pit beef (thin-sliced roast beef with horseradish), and local diners outlined the city’s food history (35:21–46:31).
• Renaissance Faire Culture: Fond reminiscences of Maryland Ren Fest, naked bike rides in Portland, “juggling chainsaw comedian,” and elusive elephants.
  • “It is so popular now that...the entire summer sells out the first day.” (57:31, Brandie)
  • “My favorite performer...has told the exact same act my entire life, and it gets more dead-eyed every single year. You can feel the divorce on his body at this point.” (57:42, Brandie)
• Milk & Childhood Food Habits: Nostalgic reflections on excessive milk/chocolate milk consumption, church–Dunkin Donuts deals, and childhood sugar sludges (like sugared Raisin Bran).
• Comedic Banter: Much discussion of “Milk Mansion” (a tongue-in-cheek reference to viral influencer housing), making fun of Firehouse’s firefighter imagery, and bits about cop sandwiches (“cop rolls”), ICE Subs, and first responder eateries (100:25).

4. Chain Sandwich Showdown: Jersey Mike’s, Subway, Jimmy John’s, and More

• Firehouse Subs found to be better than Subway, but leagues behind Jersey Mike’s and even Jimmy John’s in bread quality and freshness (94:28–96:09).
• Bread described as “soft,” sandwiches as “mid,” and portions as shrinking over time (101:39, Amelia).
• Mac and cheese, cookies, and their proprietary gator hot sauce all get positive mentions—these sides and sauces outshine the actual sandwiches.

5. Segment Highlights & Classic Doughboys Bits

• Milk Challenges: Stories about college gallon milk challenge and its classic consequence—vomit in a party bathroom (90:08, Brandie).
• Wiger Challenge (Mystery Beverage Segment, 127:40): Baja Blast “zero” (diet) vs. regular taste test—Brandie and Nick nearly tie, showcasing their soda connoisseur skills.
• Firehouse Subs Fork Scores:
  • Brandie Posey: 2.5/5 forks — “Cookie and Mac and Cheese are good. Sandwich below average. Heroes get a half point.”
  • Nick Wiger: 3/5 forks — “This was hurt by the LTOs. Proteins are not good.”
  • Mike Mitchell: 2/5 forks — “Mac and cheese, cookies, and gator sauce are the highlights. Actual sandwiches disappointing.”
• Ultimate Verdict: Firehouse Subs is solidly below Jersey Mike’s and even Jimmy John’s, and seems to be caught in a post-private equity spiral.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Firehouse’s Decline:
  • “Today is the day I learned Firehouse Subs is maybe just kind of shitty. I don’t think I ever thought this before.” (94:03, Nick)
• On Adult Milk Habits:
  • “My dad...drinks 4 gallons a week. Deeply inflamed, drinking milk all day long.” (18:05, Brandie)
• On Sandwich Storage Practices:
  • “Six hours? You’re afraid of it going rancid? That doesn’t scare me.” (28:57, Nick)
• On Franchise Decay:
  • “Fast food just sucks. Everything sucks.” (96:47, Nick)
• On Comedy’s Middle-Class Dilemma:
  • “You need to keep a healthy middle class in comedy in order for comedy to still be good at all.” (20:55, Brandie)

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Key Timestamps

• 05:11 – Grogu/Star Wars riffing
• 06:56 – “Breaking Chews” news: Heart Attack Grill closing, Las Vegas corporatization
• 12:00 – Ken Bone & Milk Mansion tangent
• 18:01 – Brandie’s family milk stories, inspiration for her comedy special
• 35:21 – Baltimore food traditions (blue crab, pit beef, unique breads)
• 57:31 – Maryland Ren Faire, favorite acts & memories
• 61:04 – Brandie on life in an LA mobile home park
• 75:55 – [Chain Profile] Firehouse Subs: history and recent corporate acquisition
• 76:37 – Brandie’s “30 free sandwiches” Firehouse birthday story
• 81:50–99:13 – Detailed review/comparison of Firehouse sandwiches vs. competitors; final judgment
• 110:00–113:59 – Firehouse “Gator Sauce” hot sauce and mac & cheese get praised
• 119:36–126:51 – Final thoughts: Fork scores and closing arguments
• 127:40 – “Wiger Challenge”: Baja Blast taste test
• 138:13–146:47 – Feedback segment: Given only two chain restaurants on a remote island, what would you pick?

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Episode Structure

Intro/Ads: 00:02–4:55 – Skip
Open Banter & News: 4:56–15:00
Guest Intro & Biographical Digressions: 17:00–35:00
Childhood Regional Foods & Milk: 35:00–61:00
Ren Faire/Mobile Home Life: 57:00–75:00
Firehouse Subs Deep Dive & Tasting: 75:55–119:36
Fork Scores (Verdict): 119:36–126:51
Wiger Challenge: 127:40–134:39
Feedback/Closing: 138:13– End

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Useful for Listeners Who Haven’t Tuned In

• Anyone looking for a definitive, comedic take on Firehouse Subs’ place (or lack thereof) in the current chain sandwich hierarchy will find it here.
• Regional food fans will enjoy insights on Baltimore food, milk-drinking lore, and the weirdness of Renaissance Faires.
• Comedy aficionados get a look behind the curtain at indie comedy’s business challenges, as well as Brandie’s dedication to artist-run, anti-corporate stand-up production.
• The hosts’ blend of earnest food reviewing and absurd riffing (milk challenges, ninja stars, cop sandwiches) keeps things irreverent, relatable, and true to Doughboys’ tone.

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In a Nutshell:

Firehouse Subs, once a “solidly above Subway” chain, has fallen victim to private-equity blandification, with only their sides and sauces deserving praise. Jersey Mike’s, Jimmy John’s, and even Quiznos are considered better bets. Brandie Posey’s tales of her “milk job,” “milk mansion,” and DIY comedy label bring warmth and color, while classic Doughboys tangents keep it light—even as the sandwiches themselves fail to spark much joy.

Transcript

[Nick Wiger]

This is a Headgun podcast. Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to YouTube.com doughboysmedia this episode

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

There's something for everyone, Wygs. Even those who are impossible to please. Whether you're booking for yourself, your partner, your picky teens and your sleep light rise early. Mom, I know that. Or your high maintenance group chat. I know that as well. It's called the Doughboys Group chat. You can find exactly what you're booking for.

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

That's right.

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

That's right wise. Find exactly what you're booking for booking.com, booking. Yeah. Book today on the site or in the app. Do it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Support for this podcast comes from Progressive, America's number one motorcycle insurer.

[Brandy Posey]

Did you know?

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Brandy Posey]

That's a whole new pair of writing gloves.

[Mike Mitchell]

And more quote today. Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. National average 12 month savings of $197 by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between October 2024 and September 2025. Potential saving. Hey buddy. This intro was originally used on our June 21, 2018 episode about this week's chain. Now I reread it as I do when we repeat restaurants. And I liked it. So I'm just using it again with a few edits for brevity. I've never done this before and if you don't like it, I know you'll let me hear it. Anyway, to the prompter. America's mayor. This was the honorific bestowed upon Rudy Giuliani in the aftermath of the September 11 attacks. As Americans were desperate for leadership and hope after the tragedy, Giuliani became a symbol of national resolve. But over the years, criticism began to surface regarding the mayor's decision making in the run up and aftermath of 9 11. Prior to the attacks, Giuliani overrode concerns from advisors and relocated the city's Office of Emergency Headquarters to the World Trade center itself. As the 911 Commission Report noted, this was a costly mistake given that the terrorist attacks knocked out radio communications, likely resulting in many of the 343 firefighters who perished in the towers never having received the order to evacuate. And after the attacks, Giuliani reopened Ground Zero prematurely and blocked an order by the EPA that cleanup workers wear respirators despite a report by the U.S. geological Survey that the air was loaded with asbestos and had the toxicity of inhaling drain cleaner. The 911 first responders illness that sickened and killed hundreds of emergency workers was at minimum exacerbated by the mayor's negligence. In July 2007, the nation's largest firefighters union released a 13 minute attack ad titled Rudy Giuliani Urban Legend. The incendiary spot contrasted Giuliani's opportunistic invocation of the attacks to raise his political profile with his demonstrated failure to protect firefighters as mayor. As retired firefighter Jim Riches, himself the father of a September 11th victim, observed in the video, he's running on 911 and it's all a fallacy, end quote. But back in 1994, the first year of Giuliani's first mayoral term, years before the Twin Tower attacks forever altered his and the nation's trajectories, two firefighter brothers, Robin and Chris Sorenson, collaborated on a new sandwich shop in Jacksonville, Florida. As the sub siblings meatloaded, firefighter themed sandwiches attracted a devoted fan base, the company began franchising in earnest in 1999 and grew rapidly nationwide over the course of the aughts. Today, the Sorensen Brothers chain has over 1,000 locations across North America and Puerto Rico, and it pays tribute to its firefighter lineage by donating a portion of its proceeds to charities benefiting America's Bravest. And also today, Rudy Giuliani's already tarnished reputation is in tatters, and the 911 candidate who mismanaged 911 has been reduced to a flailing ghoul. The disbarred TV lawyer for a reality star president universally reviled by the city he once led as the myth of America's mayor has gone up in smoke. This week on Doughboys, we return to Firehouse subscribers. Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Tigerweiger, along with my co host Grogu. If he was human, the spoon man, Mike Mitchell.

[Nick Wiger]

It's just because I went off on Grogu.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's because you insulted Grogu.

[Nick Wiger]

I love the show, it's a 50 year old baby. Is that like what. Is that what the deal is?

[Mike Mitchell]

That may. I think that's what. That's partly what you're saying.

[Nick Wiger]

I just don't see how. I'm like Grogu. Obviously they're gonna say like a baby dick or something.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, you got a small dick like Grogu. You kind of.

[Nick Wiger]

You don't know if Grogu has a small dick.

[Brandy Posey]

He could be packing.

[Mike Mitchell]

He could have a hanger. Yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

It's dong on Grogu. No one talks about it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Whatever he's got is bigger than Mitch's. We can safely assume. Love the show. I don't know if I ever agreed with a single thing Mitch has said about Star wars, but love that he keeps it real. Peace sign, hashtag no stew, no stream. So some solidarity for twisted Meadow. Alfredo Solis Fuentes at alfredo filmgeek. Rosa birdfuck.com. how about that?

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, how about that?

[Mike Mitchell]

We. I still have got a food name too.

[Nick Wiger]

Alfredo.

[Mike Mitchell]

This episode is coming out after Mandalorian has released. It's not out yet as of this recording. Mandalorian and gross Grogu and Grogu has. Has released. I have not seen it, but I've got heard some early takes that it's not a good film. We'll see. I'll see it at some point. I'll have my own assessment.

[Brandy Posey]

Do you think he speaks in this one? The Grogu say his first word.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's interesting. That would be a. That would be a nice like mid credit scene or something like that. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

What do you think his first. Yeah, yeah. What do you think his first word will be?

[Mike Mitchell]

Might be Mama.

[Nick Wiger]

Mama. That's so sad.

[Amelia Marino]

Mama.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think he looks under his robe and says bigger than Mitches.

[Nick Wiger]

So I'm in this world.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

You exist in it.

[Nick Wiger]

Him saying mama is sad because we never. We've never established his mom. So now here's his 50 year old baby.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, we got a sequel.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Also we don't know his dad. I guess the Mandalorian is his fill in dad.

[Mike Mitchell]

Mandalorians, he's. He's not the stepfather.

[Brandy Posey]

His father stepped up his chosen family.

[Nick Wiger]

That's true. All right, that's fair.

[Mike Mitchell]

Mitchell, we have some news. We have some breaking Chews. We have some breaking Chews here. Mitchell.

[Nick Wiger]

How's my guy doing?

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm doing okay, thank you for asking. Hanging in there. Yeah. You know, we've had some busy weeks, but we know how to my guy. We're power through I'm your guy.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, you're my guy.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like it. You're my guy.

[Nick Wiger]

We had a couple busy weeks. You know, I am way more. During those busy weeks. I didn't feel groggy at all today. I got the brain fog going pretty bad.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a weird thing of like, I actually. I usually don't have any energy, but today I've been. I've been. I forced myself to go to the gym before work and I actually have more energy as a result. It's a weird thing of like, you know, sleep. Sleeping more makes you sleepier and. Or sleeping too much makes you sleepier and. And not exercising makes you less energetic.

[Nick Wiger]

Only two episodes this week. Six last week.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a lot of episodes.

[Brandy Posey]

Wow, that's a lot too many.

[Mike Mitchell]

Some might say the quality may have suffered listeners.

[Nick Wiger]

You'll hear.

[Brandy Posey]

You'll hear them also you guys roll the dice with. When you record too. The 4:30, I think can be a real like energy dip.

[Nick Wiger]

There's no, There's. We have to now.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Wogs has another job.

[Mike Mitchell]

But you were weighing. Having a, like a late afternoon caffeine which I have done on. On occasion. And it. I always pay for it, but sometimes it's like I just need it to get through this. This, this recorder too. You know, Mitch, we have. We have breaking chews here.

[Nick Wiger]

Let me hear.

[Mike Mitchell]

What's that?

[Nick Wiger]

Let me hear it.

[Mike Mitchell]

The Heart Attack Heart Attack grill in Vegas is officially closed.

[Nick Wiger]

I told you this.

[Mike Mitchell]

I know you told me this, but I'm telling. I'm telling you. I'm communicating to everybody.

[Nick Wiger]

You broke two pieces of news to me. One, Milk Manor, which I told you about.

[Mike Mitchell]

And two, I didn't break Milk manner to you. I said we learned what Milk Manor was, including that you also. It's Milk Mansion.

[Nick Wiger]

Milk Mansion. I'm sorry.

[Mike Mitchell]

I said we learned what. Bill, what Milk Mansion was today. I learned it via you in a group chat we had. You sent it to Gabri and Gabri said four people had sent it to him already. But it is about a. A group of. I mean, you can Google Milk Mansion and see for yourself. People probably already know what this is. I'm just old and out of touch. It's. It's some.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know. I don't know if that's true.

[Brandy Posey]

Some milky ladies.

[Mike Mitchell]

Some milky ladies.

[Nick Wiger]

Some.

[Mike Mitchell]

Some stacked influencers who lean into that.

[Brandy Posey]

Maybe not on the work laptop.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah, maybe.

[Nick Wiger]

Maybe not. May. Maybe do it off.

[Mike Mitchell]

Turn on. Turn on the vpn.

[Nick Wiger]

Our work laptops are fine.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, who cares?

[Nick Wiger]

No one's ever hearing I'm moving into Milk Mansion.

[Amelia Marino]

Spoon man, Milk Mansion. I don't know.

[Mike Mitchell]

Heart Attack Grill is closed. On its website, Heart Attack Grill says that it will not be renewing its long term lease, adding that the soul of Las Vegas has been replaced by corporate greed. This is, this is from our buddy, our Buddy Farley Elliott's SFGate article. Basso, who's the owner, told SFGate that the restaurant is already closed permanently. I'm certainly not trying to knock Las Vegas as a community. I am only telling the honest truth about the tourist sector. It has become as short sighted of a business model as I could possibly conceive of. I love the people here. I just hate that the major corporations, what the major corporations have done to the economy. Basso added. How about that?

[Nick Wiger]

This is interesting because I'm like, this guy must be a bad guy.

[Mike Mitchell]

He seems like a bad guy. Like his restaurant is like killed people and is also like, I don't know, is it fat phobic? It's just weird.

[Nick Wiger]

It's weird. Yeah. But then also what he's saying, I'm like, well, he's not wrong. He's not wrong.

[Mike Mitchell]

I guess he is a small business owner, but a mom and pop. Yeah, it is a mom and pop, but it's just like it's a fucking weird place. That maybe it's, it's bad that it exists. I don't know.

[Brandy Posey]

Did they change the website to just

[Amelia Marino]

a

[Brandy Posey]

from now until when it's over?

[Mike Mitchell]

Just a looping flat line.

[Nick Wiger]

I, I, they, I hope that they did. I know I didn't like there was this, there's a big scale. You could step on a scale out there and I did not like being on that scale.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Scale.

[Mike Mitchell]

And if you get on the scale, if you're over a certain threshold, your meal is free. And then they had to raise the threshold because Americans are so fat.

[Nick Wiger]

We're big. We're getting big.

[Mike Mitchell]

We're getting bigger.

[Nick Wiger]

We're getting bigger.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. Some, some maybe fans of the Milk Mansion might say that's not a bad thing.

[Nick Wiger]

I agree.

[Mike Mitchell]

I got no problem with it.

[Nick Wiger]

Ken Bone is the ideal man now. America.

[Brandy Posey]

Jesus.

[Mike Mitchell]

What a poll. Ken Bone.

[Nick Wiger]

Well, you, oh, you what? You forgot Ken Bone.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I didn't. I'll never forget Ken.

[Nick Wiger]

How could we ever forget Ken Bone?

[Mike Mitchell]

His red sweater from the 2016 presidential debates where he was one of the audience questioners. And then immediately his Reddit account got doxed showing that he had a pregnant woman fetish.

[Brandy Posey]

So he isn't a milk. Milk lady.

[Mike Mitchell]

He probably isn't.

[Nick Wiger]

He might be living in milkman right now.

[Brandy Posey]

The Hugh Hefner of Milk Mansion.

[Mike Mitchell]

Ken Bone.

[Nick Wiger]

Ken Bone.

[Mike Mitchell]

He. I remember the distinctly one comment he had. It was on R Pregos, I believe, and he said beautiful human submarines, referring to God.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh my God. Beautiful human submarines.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Hey, fits the chain today.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's true.

[Nick Wiger]

What is old Ken. Did he help get Trump elected in 2016? Probably, I'm guessing.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't know.

[Nick Wiger]

What was his whole thing? Was it like. I'm not sure. He was undecided that we all. We all celebrated that he was undecided.

[Brandy Posey]

He was like the new cuddly or Joe the Plumber, I think, right?

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, yeah. Joe the plumber is kind of more evil. We should check in on these guys.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think the combination of his, you know, his appearance, his. With the red sweater and then him call his name being Ken Bone, which is an inherently funny name, was enough to put him over the top, regardless of what he said.

[Nick Wiger]

Ken Bone. Now I feel like he was kind of beloved, but I feel like he would be hated now to be like, I'm undecided it. You know what I mean? Like, I feel like, yeah, sure, get

[Mike Mitchell]

off the fence, Bone.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, get the. Off the. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

What are you undecided about? Yeah, we might be on Ozempic.

[Brandy Posey]

I bet he's on Ozempic now. That feels very 2026 in a cursed way.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm looking up news on Ken Bone and there hasn't been anything too recently. 2023.

[Emma Erdbrink]

His question from 2016. Not, not, not even a wild question. What steps will your energy policy take to meet our energy needs? What? While at the same time remaining environmentally friendly and minimizing job loss for fossil power plant workers.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Imagine if we could get that today. Yeah, I want to go back to the days of Bone.

[Mike Mitchell]

Sounds like a fucking liberal cuck if you ask me.

[Nick Wiger]

All. All articles are remember Ken Bone. Basically, yeah. Okay. And the Internet loved Ken Bone.

[Mike Mitchell]

They loved Ken Bone.

[Nick Wiger]

I remember, man, things were about to get pretty bad. People didn't realize it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Right after you got Ken Bone on the show I was working on at midnight. If I. If memory serv. I think we got Ken Bone in on video.

[Nick Wiger]

I mean, I got Bone, huh?

[Mike Mitchell]

Bone. I could be wrong or it could be. Or we tried to get Bone and he was too busy because he's like doing well. I don't remember one of the two.

[Brandy Posey]

One of whose agent was. Who got 10% of own.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, probably that Guy from Heart Attack Grill, and we'll let's hit him with a drop. But what is a Deus? Dictionary.com describes it as seats of honor or a throne.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow. Ask the deus. Ask the deus. Ask the deus. Ask the deus. Ask the Deus. Ask the deus.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, yeah, the deus.

[Mike Mitchell]

We should shout out behind the deus.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm now realizing your guy's job is too easy.

[Amelia Marino]

Do you want to do the post production?

[Nick Wiger]

What the hell? That's crazy. If Emma quit, do you think. I think Amelia would just come in with sharp elbows and just, like, grab power. I'm getting a little bossy today. Throwing my leftovers in the fridge.

[Emma Erdbrink]

How was I bossy?

[Mike Mitchell]

Careful calling a woman bossy, Mitch. You're going to get. You're going to get canceled.

[Nick Wiger]

Me? The Ken Bone of the podcast. Amelia has is a germaphobe.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I'm not that much of a. I

[Mike Mitchell]

don't think she's a germophobia. She's more cautious than some.

[Nick Wiger]

You get. You get very nervous about sharing drinks and stuff. You do, but it always seems like when it's. You have something coming up more so.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah, I try to avoid sharing drinks and stuff when, if I know big events are coming up, I don't want to get sick.

[Amelia Marino]

That makes sense.

[Mike Mitchell]

That to me, is reasonable. I mean, I was. I was taught growing up to, like, not share, like, beverages with people or not eat the, like, bites off the same side of food. I'm more casual about that now, partly because I've just been doing this podcast forever. But to me, germaphobe is like, you're wiping off, you know, door handles or using hand sanitizer after you. You shake someone's hand. And I don't see that from you.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I hide it well.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, do you do that sometimes?

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow. Okay. Maybe you are a germophobe.

[Nick Wiger]

I told ya.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Is there an incident that was like the defining moment of this either?

[Emma Erdbrink]

I just noticed slowly, over time, I've gradually have, you know, seeped into maybe. Maybe it's not problematic, but I could see in five years it becoming a problem.

[Mike Mitchell]

But you're. But you're a cat owner, too, and cats are kind of. Kind of, you know, messy, and cats

[Nick Wiger]

are actually very clean.

[Mike Mitchell]

Don't you have to scoop other litter boxes, though?

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, but that's. That's every animal shits, though.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I know, but I mean, it's like I. I feel like you maybe would get desensitized to that. To Some degree.

[Nick Wiger]

But maybe that doesn't shit. I don't know.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't think there's an animal that doesn't shit. But there maybe. Maybe some. Some organisms that have a different method of like some. Some organisms that don't have like a

[Nick Wiger]

pellet is like an owl pellet.

[Mike Mitchell]

Excretion.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Is that. Is that. You know what I mean? Is that like a. Or is that.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think that is a.

[Brandy Posey]

It's got a lot of bones.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Bony.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, they're. They're ones with animal heavy episode. Animals with cloacas. They. They. They urinate and defecate out of the same orifice, but they're still one hole

[Nick Wiger]

to rule them all.

[Mike Mitchell]

Exactly.

[Nick Wiger]

That's the cloaca.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's true.

[Amelia Marino]

It's true.

[Nick Wiger]

Hi, do famous a third layer drop parodying the Simpsons Dr. Zayas parody of Rock me Amadeus in honor of the folks who truly keep the pod running.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow. Wow. I'm an Amelia. Very nice. Very nice. Shout out and drop form.

[Nick Wiger]

That's ridiculous. Having listened to the entire backlog of Doughboys episodes, I was shocked to learn recently that Mitch used to work for the Simpsons. Question mark. Wow. Shout out to ranch in the dose cord for the drop idea. Not. Not the ranch. We know Ranch.

[Mike Mitchell]

Is that a different ranch? It must be a different ranch.

[Nick Wiger]

Cheers drop Genie aka Le 10 tickles in the doord.

[Amelia Marino]

Wow.

[Mike Mitchell]

Thank you. Drop Genie drops birdfuck.com Mitch W.S. very excited to have today's guest on the show.

[Nick Wiger]

Very excited.

[Mike Mitchell]

A very funny comedian. From the lady to lady podcast, her new special milk job is available now on YouTube. Brandy Posey is here. Hi, Brandy.

[Brandy Posey]

Hello.

[Nick Wiger]

We're all milk and bones, which also go together.

[Brandy Posey]

Absolutely.

[Nick Wiger]

Milk, milk, bones do go together. Milk and bones go together.

[Brandy Posey]

It's a calcium rich episode I feel great about. You got to go to your milk job to make your milk money so you can afford your milk mansion.

[Nick Wiger]

Are you a milk drinker to this day?

[Brandy Posey]

No. My dad is. And the special is named after my dad's milk habit.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, I love that.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. He drinks four gallons a week.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, my God.

[Brandy Posey]

The face that you were making right now.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. That's a lot of milk.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. And it started during COVID He just got real into it. The weird.

[Nick Wiger]

Does he feel good?

[Mike Mitchell]

No.

[Amelia Marino]

Does he mix like chocolate in or anything?

[Brandy Posey]

Just straight up deeply inflamed. Drinking milk all day long.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. That's a lot of milk.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. 2%.

[Nick Wiger]

We were.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's more than a half gallon a day.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Math is correct. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Saw Jimmy angel this weekend. Wise.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jimmy angel, the 90 year old teen idol who performs.

[Nick Wiger]

91 year old.

[Mike Mitchell]

91 year old team idol who performs at the. The. The Smokehouse in Burbank. You ever seen Jimmy Angel?

[Brandy Posey]

No, but I know. I know of him, but I've never witnessed it live.

[Mike Mitchell]

It should. It should all. It should be witnessed by anyone in the LA area at once. And he's a. He's quite a showman.

[Nick Wiger]

Me and Mike Carlson and Sus went, yes, this is 91st birthday. He was rocking. He's. Yeah, he's just.

[Mike Mitchell]

Three sets.

[Nick Wiger]

He does three sets. He's running around. 91 years old. He sounds great. But people buy him milk because he doesn't drink alcohol. So people buy him milk during the show. He all had like a cup with milk with ice in it. Like there's like three of them up there where he's playing. But. And they'll buy him shots of milk too.

[Brandy Posey]

Does the body good.

[Nick Wiger]

Truly. That's what I'm thinking. I'm like, it's got to be something to it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. I mean, it's maybe like that's. It's not just. Just the milk he's drinking. It's probably the alcohol he's abstaining from drinking.

[Nick Wiger]

Good point.

[Mike Mitchell]

Long healthy life. I. I don't know.

[Nick Wiger]

For me, we know you love the. You love the sauce. Wags likes the sauce.

[Brandy Posey]

A lot of booze, zero milk.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

How do you feel about a White Russian?

[Amelia Marino]

Is that. I don't.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't mind a White Russian.

[Nick Wiger]

White Russian.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think that. That because it became like a kind of a big Lebowski association, I kind of like stayed away from it once. That. That permeated the culture everywhere. But I just.

[Nick Wiger]

Big Lebowski fans too annoying.

[Mike Mitchell]

That was. That partly kept me away from. From Big Lebowski for a while.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Like, I was very late in the game in terms of seeing Big Lebowski, even though I love the cones. Because I was like, this fan base is driving me fucking crazy.

[Nick Wiger]

They also like their hate went over to the. And I'm like, the Eagles do have made good songs. And I feel like now it's just such a thing of people. Like, the Eagles suck. And I'm like, you watched the Big Lebowski when you were 20 and that has stuck in your head. But like, the Eagles have made a lot of songs that are good.

[Brandy Posey]

You're Don Henley's terrifying. I don't want to be on his bad side.

[Nick Wiger]

Of course.

[Mike Mitchell]

Scary man.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I love. I Love. I love Henley.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it's great.

[Nick Wiger]

He's great. He's good.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like that Boys of Summer song.

[Nick Wiger]

It's a great song.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a banger. Your special we should mention is on. You have a label now. Burn this Records.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I started a comedy label three years ago because most comedy industry things are really bad and I'm good at spreadsheets. So I was like, well, fuck it, I guess I'll do it. And I'm like one of the few, like actual artist friendly comedy labels out there trying to work with people all around the country that are like the pillars of their own standup scenes. Because you need to keep a healthy middle class in comedy in order for comedy to still be good at all. So that's like kind of the mission of what we're trying to do with the label. And.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, no, that rocks.

[Amelia Marino]

And.

[Mike Mitchell]

And as you know, as a fellow podcaster, it's like part. Part of the. What's great about podcasting is you can kind of circumvent the traditional outlets. You're. You're able to do that less and less. Is now corporations, much like the ones that drove the loss the. The Las Vegas's Heart Attack Grill out of business, are converging on the podcasting industry and cannibalizing that. But still, it's just like there are ways like routes like Patreon that enable you to again, just bypass all the bullshit.

[Brandy Posey]

Absolutely. And like with Standom specifically too, it's like, it is so cursed right now because we just have. Large chunks of my industry are just welcoming fascism. So it's like, it's important for me to like, take a stand against that and just try to put people that I know are good people that are funny under one roof to be like, regardless of all the other bullshit, we are good. Like, come fucking listen to what we're doing. And nobody's famous yet, but they will be if you care about, like, local good comedy. And I think that's like, who we should be looking at. As the industry continues to disappoint you more and more. Burn this records. You can find us on Instagram. You can find it. YouTube.com burn this records is where my special is. Because the channel is like, I'm monetizing that to be able to put out specials and compete with these, like, other things that are extremely predatory to stand up too. It's like there's really these so many spaces that comics will just let themselves be taken advantage of because they're like, oh, I got A little feather in my cabin. It's like, no, you should be able to pay your rent with this.

[Nick Wiger]

Sure. Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

So I'm trying to like, lead from that place because materially, it's what we need to do to take care of ourselves.

[Nick Wiger]

Podcast. The. The. I'm sorry. The sketch and improv community are pretty high and mighty that the. We don't have any fascists for as like the stand up community.

[Mike Mitchell]

Are you sure?

[Nick Wiger]

Yes. There's nothing problematic with any improv or sketch guys. Yes, yes, yes. A clean slate for over there.

[Amelia Marino]

For.

[Nick Wiger]

They're very. They're very. Everything is fine in the improv in the sketch world.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I was, I was joking.

[Mike Mitchell]

I know you were.

[Nick Wiger]

Jesus.

[Brandy Posey]

The.

[Mike Mitchell]

The, like, it's a. It's a thing that comes up also. Just generally any sort of art form that's monetized is. Artists are not good business people. Generally. Like, it's. It's. It's rare. It's rare to have a mind that can do both. Sammy Hagar can do it, but, you know, he's. He's one of one. It's so, so like you. Someone who's business savvy can very easily take advantage of very much so. Again, just like what you were saying, like, like they're platforming a person and that person's like, okay, this is what happens. Even though not. I'm not realizing them giving you way too much money here.

[Brandy Posey]

Absolutely.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Just the middle class comedy, the thing you're saying of middle class, common middle class actors, like, a lot of that stuff.

[Brandy Posey]

We need to exist. It's like, important to keep that healthy. And I mean, like the thing that, like with stand up especially. And I imagine that sketch and improv is a similar thing where it's like, it moved super. Right. Because of COVID Because the people that stayed home and like, weren't touring immediately, they got a little rusty. And then when things opened back up, the industry was like, oh, well, these guys are ready to shoot specials immediately. Because they were just killing people for two years instead.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

So the whole industry shifted and then it was like it took a while to ever catch up. And then nobody stands for anything anymore. So you just have to. If you want to, like, exist and feel good about yourself, you have to just do this kind of stuff.

[Nick Wiger]

Sure. Yeah. Yeah, I get it.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's rad.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. I'm also funny. I promise. I feel like I've just been just like, I'm a socialist comedian, but it is. Yeah. You have to stand for something in 20, 26.

[Nick Wiger]

So what, what, what, what class is Headgum as a. As a. As far as comedy classes go.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, what do you mean? Like the. The.

[Nick Wiger]

We're talking about the middle. Yeah. Middle class. Yeah. I was just wondering.

[Mike Mitchell]

Very.

[Brandy Posey]

I think putting it in like the ranks of podcasts, probably like upper middle class, I'd imagine.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Nick Wiger]

Headgum is.

[Mike Mitchell]

But you're thinking about Headgum as a network, as like a monolith. That's hard. That's hard for me. Unless you're talking about the Headgum the network side.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Which I would think of as, you know, its own thing versus like the individual podcasts on it. There's some that are bigger, some that are. That are.

[Nick Wiger]

That's funny. That's upper middle class. Because it feels like we're in a back alley here.

[Mike Mitchell]

It does.

[Nick Wiger]

Feels like you're gonna hear like, you know, a cat and a. Sirens going off. That's great. That's what it feels like when you're in here.

[Amelia Marino]

Here.

[Brandy Posey]

I don't smell piss anywhere. You guys are at least middle class.

[Mike Mitchell]

You recorded your special in Portland. I did.

[Nick Wiger]

It's a good day.

[Mike Mitchell]

There'll be a piss smell at some point. You record your special in Portland. Where are you on Portland Eats? Because it's a great food town.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it's. I love it.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Every time I go up there, I really look forward to it. I like. Cuz all the. They have the rule where all the bars have to have food in order to have alcohol. So then they're really competing on food too. So like it's every get good sandwiches up there. It's just served by somebody that's wearing cat ears. It just feels great. Great. There's always a furry with some sort of a wrap nearby. Love it.

[Nick Wiger]

We were. We were just. We were there just recently. We were. Yeah, we. We didn't even stay there overnight, did we? No, we just got a hotel for the night.

[Amelia Marino]

We flew in and drove out.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Yeah, we got a hotel with the dance.

[Mike Mitchell]

Remember?

[Nick Wiger]

It was all the. There was a tea. It was like teen. Yeah, it was. Oh, I remember.

[Amelia Marino]

Why do you think we booked that hotel?

[Mike Mitchell]

It was really strange, us working in the lobby, prepping our show and then just like, like an endless array of teens and like, like dance moms, leotards walking by.

[Nick Wiger]

It was wild.

[Mike Mitchell]

Really, really unsettling.

[Nick Wiger]

It was a. It was a. You know what? It managed to be very Portlandy, even in like the, like the seven hours we were there or eight hours we were there. But yeah, fun. A fun City.

[Brandy Posey]

That'll happen. Like, literally, I shot my special. I walked outside, and it happened to be the night of. There was, like, a naked bike ride that just was going past the theater. And I was like, all right, Portland, we get it.

[Nick Wiger]

That's dangerous for some people.

[Brandy Posey]

No, I know.

[Nick Wiger]

For me and Grogu, it's fine. I guess for. I don't know if you would be doing that.

[Mike Mitchell]

I, like, I. I would be worried about the logistics of riding a bike. Having been on the saddle a number of times, and you usually have something you're wearing, some garment you're wearing, you know, a dick in balls, if you will, to kind of keep it where you're not, like, scrunched up on it, you're not sitting on it. And so I could see that. I don't know what you do exactly.

[Nick Wiger]

So you're not sitting on it.

[Brandy Posey]

Well, no, it can go in the cavity.

[Amelia Marino]

Like.

[Brandy Posey]

Like you're tucking like a dragon.

[Nick Wiger]

We have very different anatomy. It's more like pulling it up.

[Mike Mitchell]

Like, it's more like you're keeping it out of the. You know, because the saddle. A saddle is pretty. It's got a lot of pressure on the perineum.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, for sure.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I would hate to be on seat cleanup duty. I guess after. After the naked bike ride. I guess you don't. There's no guy who's really in charge of cleaning up the bike seat.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't know. Maybe someone uses a city bike or something. Jesus Christ.

[Brandy Posey]

Now, that's a germaphobe issue.

[Nick Wiger]

Well, to go back to that.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

How do you feel about leaving out a sandwich on the table? I, like, have no issues with it. Like, I'll have a sandwich out all day, and I won't refrigerate. I think when you refrigerate, it gets a little too congealed. That's my issue with it. Like, it's gonna happen no matter what. But you put it in the fridge because you're like germs, and you also.

[Emma Erdbrink]

They're like flies running around.

[Nick Wiger]

It was. It was covered up, though. They were both covered up.

[Amelia Marino]

Like lunch meat out all day, though.

[Nick Wiger]

No, I won't, like, leave lunch meat out. No, I'll make us. I'll make us. I'll make a sandwich and then put lunch meat away, of course.

[Amelia Marino]

But there's lunch in the sandwich. So if you're leaving the sandwich out, you're leaving the lunch meat out.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, but I don't know. It's in a. It's in a sandwich, and it's like, it's usually wrapped up.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I think fry a fly, can crawl in.

[Amelia Marino]

A fly could crawl in, could crawl in. Mine's not a germ thing, but I'd be worried about like it going rancid. Sitting out all day.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Rancid. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I mean, I think within six hours you're afraid of it going rancid. I don't think that doesn't, that doesn't scare, but that's me. How do you, how do you guys feel?

[Brandy Posey]

I'm thinking like a party amount of time, like food would be out or like a board for a party amount of time. And I think that can be okay.

[Nick Wiger]

I would eat something. I would eat meat after a six hour party that was sitting. Now, I don't think it would bother me.

[Amelia Marino]

The Internet says you should leave deli meats out no longer than two hours.

[Mike Mitchell]

Now what is, where's the stress on that?

[Nick Wiger]

I'm not that scared of it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm not that scared of it.

[Mike Mitchell]

I know you're not scared of it.

[Nick Wiger]

How. But would you, would you like. I would eat a sandwich probably around like six or seven hours. I'd be fine with a sandwich being, I mean, like covered, of course, but like not in the fridge. I'm fine with that.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm not Dr. Nair about it. I'm not like crazy about it, but I think if it's going to be like, hey, it's going to be a few hours, I'd probably be on Team Amelia and put it in the fridge.

[Amelia Marino]

If I make a sandwich to take to work, I'm not taking it just in a bag. I'm putting it in like a lunchbox with a nice pack.

[Mike Mitchell]

I bring my lunch to work and I put it in the fridge and sometimes it's a sandwich.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

You know, but that's different.

[Nick Wiger]

To me when it's hot and then it's getting cold.

[Amelia Marino]

That's fair. Like a, like a cheesesteak.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I'm thinking in elementary or in high school, like school, we didn't have fridges to put our lunches in.

[Amelia Marino]

Right.

[Brandy Posey]

So those were just, just.

[Nick Wiger]

It's true.

[Brandy Posey]

That's just like out all day.

[Nick Wiger]

And I didn't, I didn't, I didn't. And I didn't have an ice pack either.

[Mike Mitchell]

No. Every day it was lunchbox. Basically every day I had a, a brown bag lunch that I was just like, yeah, it'd be like a turkey sandwich that was just, you know, on a hot day, just in my hot backpack. For like, four hours.

[Nick Wiger]

With mayo on it.

[Mike Mitchell]

With mayo on it. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

And it would be like, you know, like five or six hours before you ate it from when it left your house.

[Mike Mitchell]

But I'd also have tummy aches all the time. So was it related to. I don't know.

[Brandy Posey]

That's true. Kids puked a lot in elementary school.

[Nick Wiger]

I think that it was more so that you were drinking a full glass of milk. Speaking of.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I was drinking a lot of milk.

[Nick Wiger]

You were drinking a ton of milk.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

And I think that that's why you had the stump. The tummy ache.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I mean, like, I had milk with. What was your milk consumption growing up? Because I had milk.

[Nick Wiger]

So, you know, wives went to school at Milk Mansion.

[Brandy Posey]

I drank. You know what I have? Milk, to me, is honestly tied to church in a weird way because, like, we would go. The deal was we had to go to church, but we had to go Dunkin Donuts afterwards. And then I got, like, a. Two donuts and a glass of milk. So I very much tied, like, that reward to having to put up with going to church. So it was like. That's kind of mostly when I had it growing up.

[Nick Wiger]

Chocolate milk was a big.

[Brandy Posey]

Chocolate milk is. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

You know, I haven't had a chocolate milk in forever. It would be nice to have a chocolate milk.

[Mike Mitchell]

I drank so much Choco milk as a kid. Do you. What denomination were you?

[Brandy Posey]

Methodist.

[Mike Mitchell]

Methodist, okay. And this is in Baltimore, right? Okay. So Baltimore's got Duncan. I didn't know that.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Duncan growing up, it was a big. It was a big deal also. We did regular milk, but then also my dad and I each had our own bottles of Hershey's syrup that we were just chug raw, unfortunately. I love that, and I really wish that that's not a thing that I'd been encouraged to do as a child.

[Mike Mitchell]

That rocks.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Do people not like Hershey's as Hershey's syrup? We think of it as a cheap. Did it get. My question is, did it get worse? Was it better at some point? And now is it worse?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think. I think, yes.

[Nick Wiger]

I used to love Hershey syrup. Of course.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think, yes. But also, I think just like people's accessibility to better quality chocolate, that's what happens.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay, that's fair.

[Mike Mitchell]

But of course it's gotten worse. Everything's gotten worse.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, that's true.

[Brandy Posey]

Nothing better.

[Nick Wiger]

That's. That is. That is very true.

[Mike Mitchell]

But I was. I was slurping a lot of Hershey as a kid. Not not direct from the bottle, but I was like, you know, I was making chocolate milk at home all the time. That was my way I'd do it. Sometimes we'd have quick. But mostly it was Hershey syrup. And then, you know, I'd get some. I get some vanilla ice cream. You know, I'm a big vanilla fan. And I just. I just Peter north some. Some. Some Hershey syrup on top of it. And that was like a common dessert for me.

[Brandy Posey]

Absolutely. Did you guys ever do a raisin Bran, but then put like. Like a cup of sugar on top of it?

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Make the sludge.

[Mike Mitchell]

I was always adding sugar to cereal.

[Nick Wiger]

Corn flakes. That the cornflakes were before. I mean, I don't know if this is before frosted flakes. I sound old as. But when, like, at my grandma's house, it'll be cornflakes. And then just pouring the sugar onto the cornflakes. And it was damn, damn good. The sludge.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

That white sludge you could make, right?

[Mike Mitchell]

The precious juice,

[Nick Wiger]

Heart of the Matter and End of the Innocence. I like. Those are my. My two favorites.

[Mike Mitchell]

And of the innocence in a birthday

[Nick Wiger]

boy, sketch wise, that it's true. It's in ham hat. Yeah. And I wonder if that was my love of that song was the reason it's in there.

[Mike Mitchell]

I have a feeling it drove it. It corresponds with your character's appearance.

[Nick Wiger]

And also the other song in that is a song that I play on my birthday.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, that's right.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Running on empty.

[Nick Wiger]

Run on empty.

[Mike Mitchell]

Anyways, Mitch listens to Running by himself

[Brandy Posey]

every birthday at the beginning or the end of the birthday. Is that, like, when it turns midnight?

[Nick Wiger]

If I am. If I'm, like, by myself and it's turned midnight, I'll listen to it usually.

[Brandy Posey]

Okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Nick Wiger]

It's nice in the dark.

[Brandy Posey]

Or a candle

[Nick Wiger]

sometimes in the dark. Sometimes it's just sitting there. I'll just kind of sit and reflect.

[Mike Mitchell]

Do you want that plate at your funeral or like, your mom? Do you want to hear Pitbull's Timber?

[Brandy Posey]

Her.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a real thing. Mitch's mom wants timber to play her.

[Nick Wiger]

She says she wants pit bulls. I don't think we're gonna allow it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Why not? It's her wish.

[Nick Wiger]

It is her. All right. Maybe we'll play it at some point. Not for a very long time. You're not invited either.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I don't need to worry about. It's not gonna happen anytime soon.

[Nick Wiger]

It seems like you know a lot.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jesus Christ.

[Nick Wiger]

It seems like you know something's up, but that's all.

[Mike Mitchell]

I love your mom. She's a wonderful person.

[Nick Wiger]

Her and I are both threatened and nervous right now.

[Mike Mitchell]

Threatening you? Nobody ever threatened Mrs. Mitchell.

[Nick Wiger]

I know you were nothing, but you guys get along. You guys get along great.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, we do.

[Brandy Posey]

If she hears it, does she, like, think. Is she, like, excited about the idea of her funeral or, like, what's her reaction to the song?

[Amelia Marino]

She's.

[Nick Wiger]

She's being funny, but she's like, I want this plate at me. We're like, no, you can't have Pitbull. I don't want to hear Pitbull. If that's her real wish, I'll get. We'll get it out of her at some point. But I don't. I don't know if it's her real fucking wish, but it might be. It might be your wish.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think you should play it just in case. Just have it on cue.

[Nick Wiger]

It's something we don't gotta.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't want to worry about it anytime soon. Yes. So you're from Baltimore, as we. As we discussed. Baltimore, a good food city.

[Brandy Posey]

Really good.

[Mike Mitchell]

What are your, like, your bites that make you think of home?

[Brandy Posey]

I mean, the first solid food I ever had was blue crab.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow. Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. That's like kind of a Maryland tradition. It like really is like, like, because crab. Have you guys ever been to Crab Feast?

[Mike Mitchell]

I. I have, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know if I've ever been to a crab.

[Mike Mitchell]

One time we took a trip. We took a trip to Baltimore. We took. We were in D.C. but we went out. We spent some time in Baltimore when I was a. When I was boy. When I was a teenager, my brother was already out of the house and so it was me, my parents and. And me as me and my only child phase. And yeah, I remember going to one of those and it was just like. I. I will say first off, blue crab is great. The degree of difficulty if you're a blue crab noob is very high.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah, absolutely. It is like it's earned for sure. But it's like that is like a rite of like childhood. There is like your first memories is like your parents picking crab and like giving you a little piece of it and stuff. And I love. I love blue crab. We have pit beef, which is like. I don't. Charcoal beef that's sliced real thin with a bunch of horseradish on like kaiser.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm served pit beef at my funeral. It sounds fucking delicious.

[Brandy Posey]

I love a pipif. I love crab cake. I mean, everything Crab related. I'm very into. We also this thing, Ocean City, Maryland, has a thing called the wrapper, and it is like a stuffed pretzel that comes with, like, chicken wrapped in pepperoni and cheddar inside of it. Oh, and it is, like, so good. It's my favorite. One of my favorite things in the entire world.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, it comes with chicken or it's

[Brandy Posey]

stuffed inside of it?

[Mike Mitchell]

So chicken and pepperoni and cheese are all stuffed inside. That's wild.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

What a combo.

[Brandy Posey]

Delicious. It's called the kickin chicken.

[Nick Wiger]

You make room for, by the way, there's. It seems like, like Baltimore is not like Boston and New York City and even Philadelphia all have just been. We've been oversaturated with all of those cities a little too much. And I'm from Boston, and I'm saying this. It's just the truth.

[Brandy Posey]

Baltimore's an underground.

[Nick Wiger]

Baltimore is still. You know, they got the wire, I guess, but you got the Ravens. You got the Ravens. You got the wire. But he hasn't been. It hasn't. It hasn't been. There hasn't been, like, too much. They haven't like. We haven't been, like, oversaturated with Baltimore in the same way?

[Brandy Posey]

No. I think the accent is difficult, which makes it hard for people. But I will say we have a. Speaking of the Ravens, we have an Edgar Allen Poe impersonator that every year on Edgar Allan Poe's birthday, he goes to his grave and drinks a cognac shot. And you can see. And it's been. Multiple people in the same family have continued this tradition. It's amazing. The Ouija board is from Maryland.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

There's a Ouija board museum. It's pretty awesome. There's a 711 with a giant Ouija board on the wall in Baltimore. That's pretty sick.

[Mike Mitchell]

What's the. What's a Ouija board museum consist of?

[Brandy Posey]

Just a bunch of old Ouija.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Deeply haunted.

[Mike Mitchell]

Were you ever, like. Does that mean there's more of, like, a Ouija culture in Baltimore? Was like. Was that a thing in childhood or as a teenager?

[Brandy Posey]

I've never. I don't mess with those.

[Mike Mitchell]

You don't mess with them? No, no, no.

[Brandy Posey]

I. I have. I have too many Catholics in my family, I think, to. To really mess the Ouija board.

[Nick Wiger]

I saw Hokum last night.

[Mike Mitchell]

What'd you think of Hokum?

[Nick Wiger]

I really liked Hokum. I loved it. People say I hate stuff. I loved Hokum.

[Mike Mitchell]

You know what I saw? I saw Sheep Detectives. I loved it.

[Nick Wiger]

Your favorite writer.

[Mike Mitchell]

My letterboxd review was like, I commend everyone involved in this delightful film except for Craig Mason. Respect for As a man, but I do think it's a, it's a. Just a. Kyle Balda directed it, who directed Minions. Just a great illumination director moving into live action. It's. It's just, just absolutely charming. It's really great.

[Brandy Posey]

I don't know anything about cheap detectives. It's a live action movie.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes. It's. Hugh Jackman is being detected by. Hugh Jackman is a shepherd. He's murdered very early on, like within the first 10 to 15 minutes of the movie. And then the rest of the movie is the sheep trying to aid a human police officer in solving the crime.

[Brandy Posey]

Is this like if Babe was taken? Kind of.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's kind of like if Babe was taken. Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Okay, great. Awesome. Love it. Really into that. Great.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's how it was sold. No, I liked it. Are you, are you a movie person?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I am, but I go through, I go through phases. Sometimes I like, I just won't pay attention, like what's coming out. And I've been too focused on milk job on YouTube to really be seeing anything of. With a narrative of any kind right now.

[Mike Mitchell]

You get in those work phases because I, I love movies and I, I, you know, we try to see movies every week, but to go to the movie theater. But I get in work phases. I just like, Jesus Christ, six weeks has gone by I haven't seen, I mean, watch anything at home and then get so far behind.

[Nick Wiger]

I saw two movies this weekend. That's. I always like a two for you movie weekend. That's always nice. I'm gonna try to hit a couple more this week. We'll see what happens. Yeah, it feels like we're getting into the. There's some fun stuff coming.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's some fun stuff.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, we were a little bit of a slump, I think for a minute,

[Brandy Posey]

but yeah, I rewatched Fire, Twin Peaks, Firewalk with me this week.

[Nick Wiger]

I've actually never seen that because I never finished season two of Twin Peak. I've watched like almost all of season two and I didn't finish it. So I haven't, I have not watched Fire. Oh, wait, yeah, that's the movie.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes.

[Nick Wiger]

So I've never, I never watched it, but I think.

[Brandy Posey]

You know what, you know what the, what happens in the.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know if I know. Actually. I gotta find out.

[Brandy Posey]

I mean, it's great. We're doing a re watch on Lady. Lady's Patreon, because Babs has never seen

[Nick Wiger]

it and we're doing like Twin Peaks. The show itself or.

[Brandy Posey]

Well, just one episode. Like the first season. We just started a new thing where we're watching one season of a show that one of us hasn't seen. And I had to watch Dawson's Creek, unfortunately. And now I'm making Babs watch Twin Peaks so I can have a break.

[Nick Wiger]

This happened to me with, with Twin Peaks and Deadwood to show, and I love both of them. But Deadwood, how many seasons is there? Three seasons.

[Mike Mitchell]

Three seasons.

[Nick Wiger]

There's three seasons, like with Deadwood and with like, I watch them for so long and then I just will fall off for a while and then I'm like, I gotta start it again and then I'll restart it and I'll just watch the first season again and then fall off again. I gotta. Maybe I just should pick up the second season and watch and watch like a recap of the first season or something.

[Brandy Posey]

I go through. I like just watch a show like that. Just watch the entire thing and then I won't watch anything narrative for like four months. But I really like, I'll watch the same five episodes of Forged in Fire over and over again. I'm very into a knife making reality show. Or have you guys seen Homestead Rescue? That's the only other reality show I watch.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, what is that?

[Brandy Posey]

It's on hbo and it is like Bar Rescue except with homesteads.

[Mike Mitchell]

Love that.

[Brandy Posey]

It's a family from Alaska that's very good at homesteading. Going out to find people who are like slow motion family annihilators is how it feels to me where I'm like, why the hell did you move your family to the middle of the woods with no survival skills whatsoever? It's amazing because you feel like you are like learning something about how you could live off grid, but then also you are judging people that made so many bad decisions. It's amazing.

[Mike Mitchell]

As someone who's seen a lot of bar Rescue, I'm mapping Bar Rescue onto homesteads and just imagining someone walking into a poorly run homesteader. We're shutting this whole place down.

[Brandy Posey]

That's exactly what is happening. It's. It's amazing. And the family that fixes them is from Alaska and they're crazy in their own right. And it's. It's awesome. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Your wife left you because you don't know how to grow crops.

[Brandy Posey]

So many of these people just move the middle of the woods and they haven't had a toilet for four years.

[Nick Wiger]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

And then this family shows up and then they yell at them for not having a toilet.

[Nick Wiger]

It's 1pm in a podcast studio. Where is everyone?

[Mike Mitchell]

I love Taffer to do podcast rescue for Head Gum.

[Nick Wiger]

Podcast rescue is good.

[Mike Mitchell]

He changes the name to, like, Potty's Place, and then we close in, like, three months. It always happens. Taffer comes into a business, completely fucks it up. Drives away all the loyalists, doughboys. We like regulars.

[Nick Wiger]

We review fancy hats.

[Mike Mitchell]

No one cares about food anymore. You review hats.

[Nick Wiger]

Nice hats is the thing to review.

[Mike Mitchell]

So I give this fedora five brims. Mitch, what do you think? Our Patreon goes down to zero.

[Nick Wiger]

There's some. We have some. There's some. There's got to be a few fat hat guys on the. You know that there's.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's some fat hat guys.

[Nick Wiger]

There's some fat hat guys.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, there's those Venn diagrams overlap.

[Brandy Posey]

Have you ever been in a bar rescue bar and just felt that it was before you had it confirmed?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I've been in. I've been in a couple. I mean, there's. There's some in la.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

So there's. I mean, Dimples was rescued and Dimples, I think is. Is closed now.

[Nick Wiger]

Permaclose. So.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

But the. There's also a sports bar in North Hollywood. Or. Or is it Burbank there? There's one near our. When we were like, several podcasts before, we were right near a bar rescue

[Nick Wiger]

bar, and it was like a dive bar. And like, people liked it as the dive bar. We. We went in there, didn't we?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes. And they. It's like one of the NBA game

[Nick Wiger]

plan at that point. There was something. Why were we there?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think we were there to watch a sporting event. That would make sense.

[Nick Wiger]

I know why we were there because we used to record up there.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, Recorded right by there.

[Nick Wiger]

That's what it was.

[Amelia Marino]

Champs.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think it was Champs. Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Sports pub.

[Mike Mitchell]

That sounds right.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, that feels good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Can we look up champs on it? Because there's a bar rescue site that says, like, kind of how everything happened. I love it because the bar rescue recap, you go through and just place after place, it's just like this place closed, place is out of business.

[Nick Wiger]

That doesn't work at all.

[Mike Mitchell]

This place had a porno shot in it, which is really one of them.

[Brandy Posey]

I can't believe a blue drink didn't fix this.

[Nick Wiger]

Asian nightmare is similar thing. Like, it's sad. It just. It doesn't work. I mean, it's a ruthless Business. Anyways, wait one.

[Mike Mitchell]

One thing that Baltimore makes me think of is it was kind of the. The nexus of diner culture in America. Do you have any diners you remember from Baltimore?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. So there's a place called the Honeybee Diner, Glen Burnie, Maryland. It is still, to this day my favorite diner ever, because the most grizzled old waitresses of all time and me and my high school friends, because also in high school, it's like you're looking for third places, and diners are kind of the thing that you can go to and be in overnight. So we would spend New Year's Eve at Honeybee, and we would just go and we. I remember us one year trying to bring a Martinelli's for the waitresses, and they're like, you can't drink that in here. We're like, it's. It's for you, though. And they were like, we don't want that.

[Amelia Marino]

Okay.

[Brandy Posey]

I just remember silently watching the countdown on the television, and then I was like, oh, I think when you're an adult, you don't care about New Year's.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

It was a fun lesson to learn

[Mike Mitchell]

early on that rocks.

[Emma Erdbrink]

You're.

[Nick Wiger]

You're usually in bed before the clock hits zero, right?

[Mike Mitchell]

These days, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm not. I'm not someone who bothers to stay up anymore. I mean, I'm just on, like. I'm just such a used to my. My. My old man's sleep schedule. But is it the one thing I think of? Because I'm thinking specifically the movie diner where they have fries with gravy on them. Oh, yeah, That's a. That's a Baltimore thing.

[Brandy Posey]

It is, yeah. Yeah. I feel like you see a lot of gravy on stuff. Well, there's also, like, not biscuits and gravy, but there's like chip beef and gravy. Do you guys know what that is?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I've heard of chip beef and gravy.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. That feels very growing up to me. Also, scrapple is a big deal there.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, scrapple.

[Mike Mitchell]

Scrapple, which I use. I associate with Pennsylvania, but it's part of Baltimore.

[Brandy Posey]

It bleeds down on into it. Yeah, I love scrapple.

[Mike Mitchell]

Scrapple. Everything but the oink. I've never had it.

[Brandy Posey]

It's really good. It needs to be crispy. I think, personally, some people, it's gray otherwise, so it should be crispy.

[Mike Mitchell]

What is the texture like of scrapple?

[Brandy Posey]

It's real mushy in the middle. It's like, you know. You know how, like, you get Like a sausage patty. Sometimes it's like if that was like a little looser.

[Mike Mitchell]

Kind of sounds delicious.

[Nick Wiger]

Sounds good to me.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. Real loose. Sausage patty.

[Nick Wiger]

Baltimore and Pittsburgh, I feel like the two east coast cities that are. That haven't. We haven't been just completely.

[Brandy Posey]

Pittsburgh is great too.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. They're under also. Baltimore has. We have benches that say baltimore, greatest city in the world. And they make me laugh every time I see them. I love it.

[Mike Mitchell]

That is fun.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

We've never. Have we ever done a show in Baltimore itself? I don't think so.

[Mike Mitchell]

No. I think we've done a DC Enough number of times and that's kind of works for the. The greater Baltimore area. But. But we. Yeah, we know. We. We got ourselves.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

It's really, really fun. It's a great city. It's charming. I find that you're right on the water. It smells bad most of the time, but it's just like. It's really great. Everyone's just like, descended from like an old waterman of some kind. And it's just got a lot of charm, too.

[Nick Wiger]

Charm City that way for. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, nothing. It's all. We're all the same now.

[Mike Mitchell]

What do you mean?

[Nick Wiger]

Like, localism is gone. It's gone.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, you think? Everything's gotten pretty homogeneous. It kind of.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, it has.

[Brandy Posey]

Baltimore has not. Because we've also, like, don't have like a. It's a very poor city still.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

So it's like, it's. It's never had, like, an industry come in with a ton of money and kind of change it.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Boston is. They say the Boston accent is. Is dissolved. It's going away.

[Mike Mitchell]

Is it really?

[Nick Wiger]

So there's. There's a lot of articles about how the Boston accent is just. I mean, I mean, you'll go and you'll hear a lot of people with it, of course, but people, like, take

[Amelia Marino]

classes in Boston to train it away.

[Brandy Posey]

Really?

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah, because it, like, makes they. People think. It makes them sound unintelligent. So it's harder to get jobs. So they, like, will take a class to learn to get rid of it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, no, I've never thought of. Mitch is unintelligent.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Oh, look, you've done been doing that fucking work, you fucking asshole. Are you happy? Are you happy? Are you happy? You've destroyed the Boston accent.

[Mike Mitchell]

People like you. Yeah, you know what?

[Brandy Posey]

I'm glad.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I. I like, I've never. When I, like, we're hanging out with your Quincy crew, I'm like, I'm like. I'm hearing the Boston accents left and right. I'm hearing you code switch a little bit without even knowing it. I'm not code switching back into it. You slide back into it. And even talking to your. To your mom and Courtney, your sister.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay. Yeah. But maybe it comes back out of me. Yeah. And by the way, they all have Boston accents and they think you're fucking stupid. So there you go.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay. You perform. You're telling us before recording that you've been doing stand up for a long time. You perform standup at the Warped Tour.

[Brandy Posey]

Yes. What is that? Like, it's. It's a real exercise in ego death because, like, you will just be performing and doing really well for, like, 50 people, and then, like, Sublime will just start playing and you just watch 50 people to go, sorry. And you're like, no fair. I would also go leave right now if I wasn't contractually obligated to be here. So, yeah, it's. It's. It's fun. They. They initially wanted us to do, like, much longer sets, and I kind of was able to talk them down and be like, nobody wants to watch us for half an hour. No one want. No, we don't want to do half an hour. So it's like, it's. It's very fun. And, like, I have a merch booth all day, which is a blast, which I've never actually gotten to have, and just like, talk to people and with them all day and stuff. So it's. It's also like, comedy is the flea on the dog's back. That is music. I always feel like, so anytime that you can just. Just be around it, you're like, oh, no one actually cares about us. It feels nice to not have the responsibility of this on my shoulders.

[Nick Wiger]

We. We did one, remember, with that show we did in San Francisco where we did. Where we. It was like a music show where we were on the stage or. It was like a comedy.

[Mike Mitchell]

It was a. It was a comedy festival, but it was mostly a music show. But there were also, like, our. Our stage. We. We did a bit. We did a thing with. With Paul Scheer, and then we. And then Gabris was hosting it, and then we also judged a weed contest afterwards. Was it a bong contest?

[Amelia Marino]

It.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, maybe it was a bong making contest.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

I don't believe I wasn't there.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's what I was gonna say. I can't believe Emma missed this.

[Nick Wiger]

Was this before your time?

[Amelia Marino]

I actually kind of remember you guys Being there. And someone on the tech team called me about recording the show and I was like at a brewery here. For some reason I wasn't there. I don't remember why, but I think

[Mike Mitchell]

because it was a one off.

[Amelia Marino]

Like I should have been.

[Mike Mitchell]

We absolutely should have traveled. You. No, I guess.

[Nick Wiger]

No, no. Of the we a bunch of free weed. All right.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah, yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

No, not for the doughboy side.

[Nick Wiger]

You should have been there.

[Brandy Posey]

Were they like they were given a bong to decorate or were they like crafting something?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think they were crafted a bong.

[Nick Wiger]

I think they showed us bongs that they made and we're like, this one's good. I mean it was me and wager judging it, which is the wrong people to judge it too.

[Mike Mitchell]

But. But I do I it on craftsmanship, creativity.

[Nick Wiger]

It. It did it. I felt like that thing where battery should have been thrown at us. So that's like that. Like that's the one time where we're on it. Cocoa bannas want us to to do Gathering of the Juggalos which does feel like we would probably get thrown at us.

[Mike Mitchell]

That feels like. And I'm curious to stand his perspective. Like. Like that feels like a bridge too far. Like I think it would be. It's fun in theory, but then I think you're actually there and then you're just like being pelted.

[Brandy Posey]

I heard know somebody that opened for Harlan Williams at the gathering and he was not a famous person and he had circular saw blades thrown at him on stage.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh my God.

[Brandy Posey]

So he got off the stage about 30 seconds later and was like, you're gonna have to pay me. But I'm not going back up there.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jesus Christ.

[Brandy Posey]

ICP is playing Warped Tour Orlando. So I am going to see them, which I've never seen them live before. I'm very excited.

[Nick Wiger]

Circular saw blades.

[Brandy Posey]

Circular saw blades.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Just a crime.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, I guess that is just a full on crime.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jesus.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, because I remember before that I was like I would ironically go to the gathering. That could be fun. And then I was like, oh, I don't think it's actually. I don't think that's actually fun.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, it's one. It's one thing to have like, you know, snowballs and like bottle rockets shot at you, but Jesus Christ. I'm gonna get actually very badly wounded.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, exactly. Wow. Like to keep all my digits and tags at a gig. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I think they might be easy to throw too. It feels like.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's like a.

[Nick Wiger]

Feels like you could really get somebody with One of those things.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I think you could. Yeah. It's like a shuriken.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, it is like a shuriken. I agree, man.

[Mike Mitchell]

Remember when ninja stars used to be like all the rage? What about ninja stars? Bring back ninja stars.

[Brandy Posey]

And that thing that Xena had too, right?

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

That would be sick.

[Mike Mitchell]

What happened to throne weapons? We need to throw in weapon resurgence?

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know if we need throwing weapons back.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm not saying like in our. In like reality. We have plenty of weapons in reality. I'm saying like 80s and 90s, there

[Nick Wiger]

was a big ninja.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's a big ninja thing.

[Nick Wiger]

Ninjas have been around for a very long time.

[Mike Mitchell]

But I also think shurikens became bigger than ninjas themselves. And you just see like, like throwing stars and they're fucking awesome.

[Nick Wiger]

I mean, the turtles brought along a lot of.

[Mike Mitchell]

The turtles brought along a lot of it. But then also like an eraser. Schwarzenegger is a fucking knife.

[Nick Wiger]

Throws. Yeah, yeah. Projectile weapons that.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, well. Well, projectile weapon. I think income is a large thing that encompasses guns and specifically thrown weapons.

[Nick Wiger]

Throne weapons.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I feel like there was a point when it's like it be guns. Guns came in and it became real lazy. Right. Cuz before it was like all the. Yeah. The throwing stuff was like kind of fun. And then you're like. Then we started fetishizing the guns in our action movies a little bit more.

[Mike Mitchell]

We have the. We have ax throwing as a thing now. Like people go to ax throwing bars. So it feels like let's get. Let's get some. Some throwing back into our. Our movies and TV shows.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, they throwing. I agree. Fun. Throwing is fun.

[Mike Mitchell]

A spear.

[Brandy Posey]

Like I like to get a sigh. Can you throw? Do you throw a sigh?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think you can throw a sigh. I think it's more. More likely to be handheld, but you could.

[Amelia Marino]

You could throw.

[Mike Mitchell]

Do one of those.

[Brandy Posey]

That'd be great.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

You guys see the new Mortal Kombat? My man.

[Mike Mitchell]

I know. I can't believe I'm seeing it yet.

[Emma Erdbrink]

If you guys went to the Renaissance fair with us last week, done some ax throwing, some knife throwing, some spear throwing. I think I had the little.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's awesome.

[Brandy Posey]

Yo, Shout out to Maryland Renaissance Festival in Crownsville. One of the best ones in the country. I've heard from several Renaissance performers. Wow. It's the top tier one to perform at it, really.

[Nick Wiger]

Amelia was dressed up as a jester, I believe.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yes.

[Mike Mitchell]

I was cool.

[Amelia Marino]

He rocked.

[Brandy Posey]

We had a blast.

[Emma Erdbrink]

It was me, Emma, Mike and Gabris.

[Amelia Marino]

We threw A lot of things. We threw spears, knives, and axes. We didn't do the stars.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I guess we didn't do stars.

[Nick Wiger]

I didn't join you guys, but then when I saw how long you were there, I was like, I am thrilled. I didn't go. You were there for, like, nine hours.

[Amelia Marino]

We got there at noon and we left at six. We were there for six hours.

[Nick Wiger]

Six hours.

[Mike Mitchell]

We had a great time, though. We had a blast.

[Nick Wiger]

It looked fun. It looked fun.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's our behind the scenes team. And then also Gabris, our most frequent guest. It was basically the fun version of Doughboy. It's just minus me and Mitch sulking and complaining.

[Nick Wiger]

It looks fun as hell.

[Amelia Marino]

It was a blast. If you've never. I'm not even like, Renaissance Fair is not my, like, shtick. Not my thing. I'd never been to one. Didn't know what to expect. A thousand percent would go back. I had so much.

[Nick Wiger]

I've been to one. I've been to one before. Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Everybody was there to have a good time.

[Nick Wiger]

I want to get. I want to get chastised by that lady.

[Emma Erdbrink]

As I. Yeah, that was.

[Nick Wiger]

As I drink beer, she would like,

[Emma Erdbrink]

pour the drink down your. Your throat and be like.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah, you say fresh things.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah, you. You take that. Oh, you're doing really good.

[Amelia Marino]

Like, it was like, it was wild.

[Mike Mitchell]

That is way too up my alley.

[Amelia Marino]

It was such a weird, like, mixture of that. And then, like, families with their kids. Yeah. Oh, total.

[Brandy Posey]

There's also, like, a look that you only see at a Renaissance festival. And it's like a man who has seen too many boobs. It's like the end of the day because of just like, all the, like, push ups.

[Amelia Marino]

Everybody's had their boobs out.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

You just.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's a look at a man's smile curse.

[Brandy Posey]

He just is like, I didn't know you could see to the end. It's hilarious. I love it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, back home to Milk Mansion.

[Brandy Posey]

That.

[Mike Mitchell]

That is so like, she force feeds you and is mean to you at once.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yes.

[Brandy Posey]

It's not even mean.

[Emma Erdbrink]

It's more like.

[Amelia Marino]

It's like.

[Emma Erdbrink]

It's like a combo of, like, being mean but also, like, praising you at the same time.

[Amelia Marino]

Yes.

[Mike Mitchell]

For taking me down.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't think you'll ever go to a Renaissance fair. What do you think of that?

[Mike Mitchell]

I would say, like, kill the praise.

[Amelia Marino]

You maybe could ask for that.

[Nick Wiger]

I didn't know I was gonna say now. Now you might go to Renaissance Fair after hearing about how you can get chasti by the way.

[Mike Mitchell]

And ninja stars, apparently, you know, I can throw those.

[Nick Wiger]

But you're a man who goes to bed before New Year's.

[Mike Mitchell]

But if we're talking about an afternoon

[Amelia Marino]

activity at 7pm Those are w hours.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I was like, natalie, do you hear like blowing the horn in the other room on New Year's Eve as you're asleep? Is it like that sort of situation or is it you're both in bed?

[Mike Mitchell]

We will usually go to bed around the same time. Yeah. Okay. All right, Fair enough. But she would absolutely have a party without me.

[Amelia Marino]

Amazing.

[Nick Wiger]

You're in the other room watching Sheep Detective.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, you've. You've been to the Baltimore Renaissance Fair?

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah. Growing up every year. It's also awesome.

[Mike Mitchell]

I love it.

[Brandy Posey]

It's so popular now that you, like, cannot get tickets day of, like, it's that when the tickets go on sale, the entire summer sells out, like, in the first day.

[Mike Mitchell]

Do you have a favorite thing that you look forward to at the Ren Faire?

[Brandy Posey]

Yes. So my favorite performer of all time, actually is a Renaissance performer at the ball Tar at this one. He is the juggling chainsaw comedian. And this is a man that he juggles things with a chainsaw on a unicycle. But he has told the exact same act my entire life. And it gets more and more dead eyed every single year. And it's amazing watching him just go through the motions, but just be chucking this chainsaw in the air. You can feel the divorce on his body at this point. It's so funny. And then like maybe 10 years ago, he asked people to throw things up on stage to try to go with his chainsaw. And this guy, like, threw up a copy of Big on DVD and I was like, why the fuck is Big here? Who brought. Who brought Big on DVD to the RenFest? Why? Why? Why is it happening? Why is it here? It was amazing. It was amazing. Yeah. That guy is my favorite dude. I've watched him like, every single summer that I'm home for Ren Fair. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's awesome.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it's. It rules. There used to be an elephant back when we didn't realize how bad that was. But it's not there anymore.

[Nick Wiger]

That. Yes. Yeah, I know. We said, look, things used to be good. We used to be able to ride the elephants around. We were having a blast. Do that. Do they not. Are they don't do it. There's like, no more show elephants. Are there or.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I don't. I mean, I think there's maybe some circuses that do it. But it's. It's.

[Nick Wiger]

You can't. You can't. You can't ride an elephant anymore, basically.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think probably some states where in

[Amelia Marino]

other countries as you can. Circus sense. No.

[Brandy Posey]

Maybe Missouri.

[Nick Wiger]

Did you ride it? I did as a child.

[Brandy Posey]

I wrote an elephant.

[Mike Mitchell]

A lot of people have been on the back of an elephant. I've never been on an elephant or a camel.

[Amelia Marino]

I have.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They don't do it anymore.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I would. I would. It. It's weird. Like, I get the appeal of it. Absolutely. If I was a kid and had the opportunity to get on back of an elephant, I'd be a little scared, but I would want to do it.

[Nick Wiger]

Of course. It's good. It's a good thing that it's gone.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm really. That's funny. The Ren Fair had an elephant. I guess that fits, right? I guess.

[Brandy Posey]

I think if you get one, you.

[Emma Erdbrink]

You use it.

[Nick Wiger]

You're just like, sure.

[Brandy Posey]

Well, we got an elephant.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

I learned you could do like, whatever the. You wanted to run fair. People, like, have come dressed up as, like, stormtroopers and they act like they're from the future from a different timeline. There was a dude dressed up as Shrek. Like, you can literally do whatever you want.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Okay.

[Brandy Posey]

It's really fun to watch a Shrek, a Jack Sparrow. See another Jack Sparrow.

[Amelia Marino]

Yes, there was a Jack Sparrow. We saw Jack Sparrow.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. They're really fun because they're usually getting kicked out of something at the Ren faire and then running into each other that way.

[Nick Wiger]

The. The. The Shrek. I guess Shrek is Shrek from medieval times.

[Amelia Marino]

I mean, the Shrek world is medieval adjacent, I guess.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay, that's fair.

[Brandy Posey]

Love Shrek.

[Mike Mitchell]

People do love Shrek.

[Nick Wiger]

Remember, they cleaned up. They. They Pirates of the Caribbean went. Woke, as we know. But then they added in Johnny Depp at the end. What a misfire. It feels like, like, is it still in there?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think Depp's still in there.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Depp is still in there.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think Jack Sparrow is still a presence. It's a good animatronic.

[Nick Wiger]

It is a good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Got to say that I agree. Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

They just. They changed everything else and then they put. It feels like you could take him out and put all the other stuff back and it would be. It would be just as fine.

[Mike Mitchell]

They updated some of his. Of his VO so he's like, she lied on the witness stand.

[Nick Wiger]

I found it turd in me bed.

[Mike Mitchell]

You have a unique living situation here in la, which is that you live in a mobile home community.

[Brandy Posey]

I do, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I love it.

[Mike Mitchell]

You've lived there for a while now.

[Brandy Posey]

I have, yeah. So I've been there for 12 years now. It's funny because I. It's, it's, it's in a very cool part neighborhood in the city. I love it quite a bit and

[Mike Mitchell]

it is a cool neighborhood. I know it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

It's really fun. And like I. My very first stand up tour I ever went on, I was gone for six weeks and when I was gone, the apartment on either side of me got sprayed for cockroaches. So I came back to a horrible infestation after my first triumphant tour around the country. And I was like, so they left

[Nick Wiger]

that place, they came over here straight into my place.

[Brandy Posey]

And I was like, you're never sharing walls again. You need to find, figure something out. And I just started driving around LA and I found this trailer park. The day that my trailer got put up on the market, it was just like meant for me. It was amazing. And I called, I wrote like a nice letter. I was able to like. I bought my house in Los Angeles for $45,000.

[Mike Mitchell]

Amazing.

[Brandy Posey]

No big deal. Yeah, it's a two bed, two bath. I pay lot rent, but it's like incredibly cheap. And we have like 32 houses in our park and wow. It's a lot of old, like a lot of old people then, then also young people and we're all friends with each other and we have like potlucks a couple times a year and we have like Halloween decorating contests and stuff and it's really awesome. And one of my favorite things about

[Mike Mitchell]

Los Angeles, it's such a cool, like, it's like it seems. Yeah, it seems like a really cool small community.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, it sounds good as hell.

[Brandy Posey]

It. It really rules. And like I painted my hat. My house is like bright purple with like, I have like this ombre roll on the front of it and I have a 12 foot skeleton next to it. And it's just like I just have a silly little home and I love it so much and it just makes me happy every time I'm there.

[Nick Wiger]

Eminem did damage to the trailer, to the trailer. Living with him when he was, you know, when he's speaking against his mom and her living there, he did some bad, irreparable damage.

[Brandy Posey]

We've had some trailer.

[Nick Wiger]

Shame on you, Eminem is all I'm trying to say.

[Brandy Posey]

We have had some trailer park moments. Like, don't worry, I have several neighbors that have Died of just, like, you know, old age or whatever. But, like, when I first moved in, our first lot manager was on hospice. She died three days after signing our rental agreement.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, my God.

[Brandy Posey]

Her son took over that place. He was a blackout drunk diabetic with a cotton candy machine. So he killed himself with cotton candy like, six months later.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jesus.

[Nick Wiger]

And I was like, way we're gonna go.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. I was like, damn trailer park. Okay. Getting crazy in here. And then we had a hoarder that she passed away of old age. She used to buy me a five gallon jug of peanut butter every year for Christmas because she said that that was her secret to old age. So I got that from her.

[Mike Mitchell]

It feels like peanut butter is good for the year.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Every mental issue I have, you're putting in different trailers right now.

[Brandy Posey]

It sounds like she was my. My next door neighbor directly, and she died right before COVID of. She was, like, 83, and so early Covid. We got to watch a bunch of people come in and just clean out a hoard. And it was honestly the best entertainment I ever could have asked for because, like, me and my roommate at the time, we kept kind of being like, what'd you find? Because we see the guys kind of get together and, like, huddle up and be like, what'd you find out there? And, like, I have a rusty machete that they pulled out of her house. That's pretty fun.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, my God.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. I have an old photo album of, like, her family. She didn't have any next of kins, so it's like they were just gonna chuck this photo album, and I was like, I'll take it. I. I hate seeing, like, old photos thrown away.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, sure.

[Brandy Posey]

You know, so just have this. My old neighbor Raina's photo album or family.

[Nick Wiger]

That's beautiful. There's like, a real sense of community there. Like. Like, will you guys have, like a bon. Do you have, like, like, cookouts or bonfires or anything like that?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, we do. We. There's. Well, the park manager now. Her and her husband have a band. It's very Tim and Eric energy during lockdown. They were the only live music that I saw for two years.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, man.

[Brandy Posey]

And they like to throw little concerts with just the two of them, and then they will livestream on Facebook, but then only play to the Facebook. It's as if you were not there at all watching it happen. It's amazing. So they play, and they usually get pizza, and sometimes they'll grill out and stuff. And it's Just a very fun little community. We had this guy named Barry that passed away a few years ago. He was an older guy, and his family came to clear out his trailer, and we just were all telling stories about Barry, and they were like. Like, we didn't know anything about him. And I was like, no. Barry was like, my homie. Barry told me one time that I needed to be careful because if I kept losing weight, I would never be a Lane Bryant model. And I was like, what a specific compliment, Barry. Thank you for that.

[Mike Mitchell]

Rest in power.

[Brandy Posey]

Rest in power, Barry.

[Nick Wiger]

It's always fun when. Well, rest in peace to Barry. But it is always fun when you hear things about one. You hear you're too big, and then you hear all this stuff about how you should lose weight or. Or if you lose too much weight. It's. You can never do. You can't do anything right.

[Mike Mitchell]

Make anyone happy.

[Nick Wiger]

Can't make anyone happy. Mom?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. He tried to give me a gun, too, but I, I. He's just going to give it to me one day.

[Mike Mitchell]

And I was like, I don't know

[Brandy Posey]

if I can just take Barry, but

[Mike Mitchell]

he tried to give you a gun?

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Like, for your. Like, like, you should have one of these because you're. You know what? That's wild.

[Brandy Posey]

He's like, I care about you. Want to make sure you have protection in the house. And I was like, Like, I appreciate it. I do have a dog, but it's good to know that there's just loose guns two trailers down.

[Mike Mitchell]

I mean, it is, in some sense, a thoughtful gesture.

[Brandy Posey]

No, he was, like, very. He was from. He was, like, from Detroit. Like, he was a. He was just a retired Marine. He was just, like, a sweetheart guy. Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

You. You and Mitch have something in common, which is that you both worked on prices, right. Many, many years ago.

[Brandy Posey]

We did.

[Nick Wiger]

That's right.

[Brandy Posey]

Hell, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I was there for the Barker turnover. I don't. You. You were you there, like, a year after that? Basically.

[Brandy Posey]

A year after that. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay. Y. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

And who was host of this era?

[Nick Wiger]

Drew Carey.

[Mike Mitchell]

Did it go right into Carrie? Yeah, I think it did. Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. There was no. There was. It was. There was, like, a thing where they were, like. I think they maybe had a couple people come in to test. I. I wasn't. I told you that I did a test. You've heard this before. I did a test episode. I spun the wheel, and I was like, it's going to hit a dollar. And then it just stopped. And the crew guy behind it Was like. I stopped it. I was like, what the fuck? But. But. But I was a page there at. At the time. And for comedy hero Bill Maher, I was also a page for Bill Maher.

[Mike Mitchell]

Love that.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, I. I never saw any of her handkerchiefs, but he masturbates into a handkerchief before every show.

[Mike Mitchell]

Allegedly.

[Brandy Posey]

Allegedly.

[Mike Mitchell]

And it's silk.

[Nick Wiger]

And it's silk.

[Brandy Posey]

Is that a Patreon tier that he has with the club Random going on? At least they don't have merch on Patreon. But, you know, it's like.

[Nick Wiger]

But I. I was there for Woody

[Mike Mitchell]

doing it, too, before the show.

[Nick Wiger]

Wait, what was that?

[Mike Mitchell]

Him and Woody. Woody Allen. The show.

[Nick Wiger]

Never saw Woody there. I saw Ben Affleck. Was there one night when I was.

[Amelia Marino]

When I was there.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's fun.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it was a bunch of random people. It was good. I was in the. I was a PA for the makeup department, and the lady who ran it was, like, a real, real interesting lady, and she had, like, two sons that would come to taping sometimes, and she had. They. They had both grown their hair out very long, and they had, like, these long curls. And she would just, like, stare at the camera to make sure everyone's makeup was good while she brushed one of her sons next to her. And I just thought it was deeply

[Mike Mitchell]

mentally ill. That's intense.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it was a real fun early Hollywood sight.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. I'm surprised. I've never gotten this treatment in my life, but that is very. That is. I mean, I love it.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. Just brushing a son next to her.

[Mike Mitchell]

Here's a question. Here's a Price is Right question that I don't know if I've ever asked you, Mitch, but since we're kind of bridging two different generations of the show. So what was the. The food situation like there? Like, was there craft services?

[Nick Wiger]

I'll tell you this.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

No, not for me, because I was CBS page, and I was just leading people in, but backstage, probably. But this is. This is just the old school Hollywood thing. But there was the CBS cafeteria. Felt like you were on a real working lot. It was like you were in there. And I'd, like, see Bob Barker sometimes, like, oh, sorry. Shuffling through there and stuff like that. You would see, like, Days of Our Lives actors. It felt very much like Hollywood is happening. And now that whole. I think they sold that entire studio, didn't they? Like, yeah, it's gone.

[Brandy Posey]

I think a billionaire owns it or something now.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's cool.

[Nick Wiger]

Like, I would walk around and some guy would be like, hey, nice jacket. I was like, it's Billy Ray Cyrus telling me my page jacket is nice. That's. It did feel. It felt, like, kind of Hollywoody, and it felt that. It was like a. That. It felt like that, like when that was kind of dying or you'd be like, oh, I'm seeing all these sorts of. Kind of different Hollywood personalities or whatever.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. You're, like, clocking in. It felt like you were. You were like, all right, now it's lunchtime. We're working. It felt. Felt good.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. And that's. I thought. I thought I liked the cafeteria at CBS Tele TV City. That was what it was.

[Mike Mitchell]

I miss cafeterias.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's one of my current work. It's. And it. It's fine.

[Nick Wiger]

Not only that, you gotta.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm not trying to Doxy. You got a Paquito moss.

[Mike Mitchell]

We do have a Pino Moss there. That's great.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Mike Mitchell]

So you got no complaints about that. But, but, but how is it.

[Nick Wiger]

Is it. Is it. Does it just taste like Paquino moss?

[Mike Mitchell]

It tastes like pito moss. This is so. It's on the Warner Brothers studio lot. And it.

[Nick Wiger]

He ain't getting in. Even if they try, they ain't getting in there. Get in on a studio tour.

[Mike Mitchell]

Take a studio tour. It's very easy to get in.

[Brandy Posey]

Roll off of the cart. Yeah. Because you're trying to go get to the Piedmont.

[Nick Wiger]

There's a lot of effort to try to kill Weiger, if that's what you're trying to do.

[Mike Mitchell]

Don't kill. Don't come there to kill me. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Don't go there to kill him.

[Mike Mitchell]

We'll see.

[Brandy Posey]

What song are we playing at your funeral?

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, great question.

[Nick Wiger]

Also, you're in good news. You're in good shape there, because if they do shoot you, the pit is right. It films right there.

[Mike Mitchell]

No Wily could step up to the plate.

[Nick Wiger]

No Wiley can save your ass.

[Mike Mitchell]

It'll be three episodes to fix my bullet wound, but I'll come out on the other side. But then I'll have a permanent boner.

[Nick Wiger]

I'll tell you the song he's playing. His favorite song to listen to while he drives is no Music Whatsoever. Whatsoever.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's true. I do like to be alone with my thoughts. So I do think it might be appropriate to just play some white noise. Maybe just play a little bit of that for a bit. Bit with their thoughts for a bit. Not even listening to anything. Just sort of like, what's going on in here?

[Nick Wiger]

That's the priest. Is Just doing that into the microphone. Give him a little music.

[Amelia Marino]

All right.

[Mike Mitchell]

The Tetris theme

[Nick Wiger]

They're spinning your casket around to put into the grave.

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

high country.

[Mike Mitchell]

If you're traveling this summer, here's a real travel hack. Don't wait until you land to start learning the language. Instead, try Babel. What I like about Babel is it's built for real life. Not vocab lists, not verb charts, but real conversation.

[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

If you've got summer travel coming up, now's the time to start so you can actually use what you learn on the trip. Right now, Babel is offering listeners up to 60% off. Go to babel.com doughboys that's Babel B A B B L.com doughboys for up to 60% off. Rules and restrictions may apply. Wigs My cats are a part of my family and my family deserves the best. That's why I order Smalls Cat Food. Fresh protein rich meals that support cat health and happiness so my cats can live their best nine lives.

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Nick Wiger]

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[Mike Mitchell]

let's talk about Firehouse Subs was founded in 1994 in Jacksonville, Florida by former firefighter brothers Chris and Robin sorensen. Wow. In December 2021 the chain was acquired by Restaurant Brands International, which also owns Burger King. It has about 1500 locations, mostly in in the Western hemisphere, but there's a few in like the Middle east and Albania. Each location has a firefighter themed mural which is painted the the company's headquarters in Jacksonville by Joe Puskas. And no Puskas mural is the same as the other, so each one has a unique bespoke mural by the Same artist.

[Nick Wiger]

Seems like a lot.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Brandy, you have a. You have a history with Firehouse.

[Brandy Posey]

Okay, so my. My introduction to Firehouse subs is I was doing a show in Nashville probably like 10, 12 years ago or something. And the gal I was staying with who had thrown the show, her brother in law was in town and it was his 40th birthday. And every year on his birthday, what he did is he came in from rural Tennessee into Nashville and he would go to every single firehouse subs for the day before and the day after. Because you get a free subs at a firehouse sub on your birthday and you can do it the day before and the day after. And he would get 30 free subs.

[Nick Wiger]

Whoa.

[Brandy Posey]

No veggies. Just meat and cheese. And then he would bundle them up, take them home, and freeze them. And that was his like birthday tradition. And this is like how I learned what firehouse subs was. I was like, wow, this is like a dedication to an incredibly subpar sandwich.

[Mike Mitchell]

You would get huge.

[Brandy Posey]

Would.

[Nick Wiger]

Truly insane.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a max 10 on your birthday. Or you go to different.

[Brandy Posey]

There were 10 in the area. Yeah, yeah. And he would spend an entire day doing it cuz they were like 20 miles apart at certain times.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's wild. So you're paying with your time, but you're effectively getting 30 free sandwiches.

[Amelia Marino]

Yes.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah. And he just would. He would call into his sister in law and be like, I got like three more to get before end of the day. Like he really had like a whole. This was tradition for him. Strange, strange little man.

[Nick Wiger]

This. That. That.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's what brings him joy.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I was just alerted recently. Ronnie Adrian sent me that a free steak and cheese melt for every Mike from Firehouse Subs.

[Mike Mitchell]

And this has been.

[Nick Wiger]

And Michael, Miguel. Miguel, Mikey, Mike, Michaela, Michelle, and both spellings of Michelle. You get a free. You get a free steak and cheese melt.

[Mike Mitchell]

I feel. I feel like a McHale should qualify as well.

[Amelia Marino]

We had this in the group chat at one point too.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, we did, I think.

[Mike Mitchell]

But I think it came. I think came via Ronnie past Patreon guest. Ronnie Adrian.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Amelia Marino]

The.

[Mike Mitchell]

The.

[Nick Wiger]

I said. And I said we should. We gotta do it. We should do Firehouse Subs. And I. I didn't. We did. I. Ronnie, we're gonna get you on for another episode, but not Firehouse subs.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, you told that to Ronnie.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, I did say we should get firehouse subs.

[Brandy Posey]

Sorry, I didn't do it.

[Amelia Marino]

Sorry.

[Mike Mitchell]

Not Brandy's fault.

[Nick Wiger]

But you. Well, I said, Ronnie I said, also, we should have you back to review it. And he said, lol. My name's not Michael. I, I, I, I don't, I don't, I don't get the melt.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay, then it's fine.

[Nick Wiger]

I was like, ron, I know your name's not Michael.

[Mike Mitchell]

You'll be saved as Michael.

[Nick Wiger]

No, I, I know Ronnie is Ronnie.

[Mike Mitchell]

Ronnie's telling his other group chats, thinks my name is Michael.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't think, I don't think Ronnie's name is Michael.

[Mike Mitchell]

Some other guy named Michael, he sent

[Nick Wiger]

it to me because my name name is Michael.

[Mike Mitchell]

Your name is Michael. You go by Mitch. But my name is Michael. Mitchell.

[Nick Wiger]

I did not.

[Brandy Posey]

Sandwich.

[Mike Mitchell]

Michael Donovan Mitchell.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, Free sandwich.

[Mike Mitchell]

He's back from the grave for that. I was in hiding, but I had to get that Free sandwich.

[Nick Wiger]

I was in heaven. I got in.

[Mike Mitchell]

You did?

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

They saw Michael. They let me in there. Michael, the movie that proved I did nothing wrong.

[Nick Wiger]

He's been waiting in purgatory. He. Michael Jackson's been in purgatory for, however, 15 or how long?

[Brandy Posey]

16 and a half.

[Nick Wiger]

16 and a half years. And then Michael came up. They sent that up to heaven. God said, okay, let him in. Nothing wrong here. St. Peter, open up. Thank you.

[Mike Mitchell]

One of the benefits of being God, he gets a screener of everything.

[Nick Wiger]

God gets a screen. God gets early screeners, and they send

[Mike Mitchell]

them to him on dvd. They're, like, physical. He doesn't just get the streaming.

[Nick Wiger]

I heard God just got Avatar 4. He got the screen for Isn't that cool?

[Mike Mitchell]

So lucky.

[Brandy Posey]

His DVD collection is probably crazy.

[Mike Mitchell]

Gotta be wild.

[Nick Wiger]

But some of them like that. He hasn't gotten the Odyssey yet. He's like, some of them, they, they

[Mike Mitchell]

play that close to the vest. He'll get it, but, like, he'll get it closer to release.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, he, like, replaced all his DVDs with Blu Rays. Or did he? Is he okay having a mixed collection?

[Mike Mitchell]

That's a good question. I, I would guess he's an archivist. He's a completionist, so he probably has his DVDs alongside his Blu Rays.

[Nick Wiger]

The Odyssey's woke up. He's not getting into heaven. Sorry, Christopher Nolan, you're out. This is the big controversy is that people. Did you not know this?

[Mike Mitchell]

Odyssey's woke the right way.

[Nick Wiger]

You know about this? No one knows about this.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's no way that people complain. The Odyssey is like Elon Musk, and

[Nick Wiger]

these idiots are like, the Odyssey is. Whoa.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's no way any of these morons ever read the Odyssey. They have no idea what actually is it?

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Brandy Posey]

Why do they think it's woke up?

[Nick Wiger]

It's for reasons I don't even want to say on the podcast. But. But they're morons.

[Brandy Posey]

Of course.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. But hey God's God agrees and Christopher Nolan's not getting into heaven.

[Mike Mitchell]

I. I've like so with Firehouse subs

[Nick Wiger]

I've had story continues well come in anyways.

[Mike Mitchell]

We'll find out in part two.

[Nick Wiger]

Thank you.

[Mike Mitchell]

His so Firehouse subs we've reviewed on the podcast before I but it was. It's been a while. That was I think maybe our first episode with Mary Sohn. If you remember back in the day. He's now become a regular guest. Frequent beloved guest Mary Sohn.

[Nick Wiger]

But the the I remember eating Firehouse subs at Palmerston.

[Mike Mitchell]

At Palmerston. This is where we used to record the podcast your apartment. But I've also like I used to go to Fire Firehouse with some regularity and it's Jersey Mike's completely supplanted. There was a point where it's kind of two handing. I'll go Firehouse because Firehouse because I want like a hot do a fun hot sub and like ah go to go to Jersey Mics, mix it up and then at certain points like Jersey Mike's just better than strictly better than Firehouse.

[Brandy Posey]

Infinitely better and much much better. They got a better soda selection too. Like no mural unfortunately. I'd like a mural of just a Jersey guy. I think each one. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

They will have a wild they. Speaking of soda, we talk about this a lot but they will have wild Cherry Pepsi on fountain which is like that's a great soda.

[Nick Wiger]

I like a mural just like a guy in a white tank. Like a Jersey guy in a white tank top.

[Brandy Posey]

Exactly. Just a sunburned Italian.

[Nick Wiger]

Those don't burn.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's true.

[Nick Wiger]

So it'll be good for them in the afterlife.

[Brandy Posey]

All Italians go to hell.

[Nick Wiger]

It's like all dogs go to heaven.

[Brandy Posey]

That's the sequel.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, I can't believe Trump's not down here. I wanted to meet him.

[Nick Wiger]

I sent them the ice. What's the name of the movie? I sent them the Apprentice. He let me in. You like my Trump? Yeah.

[Emma Erdbrink]

That was really good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Really good.

[Nick Wiger]

It's pretty

[Mike Mitchell]

right now.

[Amelia Marino]

They have.

[Mike Mitchell]

They have a steak and cheese milk melt. Steak and cheese. Not milk. Steak and cheese melt milk Mansion.

[Amelia Marino]

Beautiful.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's a beautiful mansion.

[Nick Wiger]

It's beautiful folks. We love it.

[Mike Mitchell]

They have a. They have a cheese steak and cheese melt and they have A chicken and cheddar rancher, which are kind of their ltos. I think it's called the rancher. Right. Am I right about that? Copy?

[Nick Wiger]

Rancher's a funny. That's a funny. Me like a.

[Mike Mitchell]

Because ranch is a profession.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes. Yeah, I like it. I'm not saying anything bad about, you know, who has a great ranch dressing. It's funny to say this, but prime pizza, great ranch.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I do like prime pizza's Ranch.

[Nick Wiger]

Great. Ranch.

[Amelia Marino]

You can buy it.

[Nick Wiger]

You can get a little. You can get a bottle, except it's not like a sealed. Like, it is like a homemade bottle. It's like a homemade bottle, which I kind of like.

[Amelia Marino]

It means it's the same one you're getting from the restaurant. They're just like putting it at a bigger place. Bottle for you. Not like some weird different version.

[Nick Wiger]

The only downside is, is that it's like this lasts like a week. I think it, like the expiration date was like a. Basically a week.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. I have a week from today to finish my bottle of ranch.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I'm just sipping on it to matter to you. But

[Nick Wiger]

I go by expiration dates. I think a sandwich can be out of this fridge for five to six hours. It's fine.

[Emma Erdbrink]

But if the fridge is right there, you might as well just use.

[Nick Wiger]

No, it congeals in a different way. It congeals, turn. You get what I'm saying? A fridge sandwich is a little bit. It changes things.

[Brandy Posey]

Bread gets wet. The bread gets a little wet.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wet bread's not ideal.

[Brandy Posey]

Like, I don't like a wet bread.

[Nick Wiger]

We don't like the wet bread.

[Amelia Marino]

I think I'd rather have that than, like, worry that it's going to make me sick.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I'll say this. My bread got wet sitting outside the fridge.

[Nick Wiger]

That is true.

[Brandy Posey]

Then it's cold and wet. That's not a sandwich.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Wait, also, what did you order?

[Emma Erdbrink]

A sub? Yes, a turkey. Turkey.

[Amelia Marino]

The turkey. Provolone.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yes.

[Nick Wiger]

Do you have anything you add anything to it?

[Emma Erdbrink]

Bacon?

[Nick Wiger]

Water?

[Mike Mitchell]

No water.

[Brandy Posey]

Just a glass of. Glass of water.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I did add oil and vinegar to it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, can be part of it.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I'll do it.

[Emma Erdbrink]

But it wasn't oily. It was water.

[Nick Wiger]

Look, we were talking about it today. The thing that we said, I think we can all agree is that with that chicken bacon rancher, the. It just. Things seem a little antiquated at firehouse subs. The chicken seems like chicken you can't even get anymore is what I was saying about it.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes. You Said you said. You said Quiznos. Quiznos. Chicken was like the. Like. I was like, oh, man. In like two thou from like in the 2000s, I ate so much chicken like this and now it just like doesn't exist anymore.

[Brandy Posey]

Bad.

[Mike Mitchell]

Unseasoned, very processed chicken breast.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Mike Mitchell]

In strips.

[Nick Wiger]

In strips.

[Amelia Marino]

This is the.

[Mike Mitchell]

This is officially new grilled chicken breast, which I'm amazed that it's new. This is a new addition to the menu because it feels again, it feels like something from the aughts or the 90s. Crispy bacon and buttermilk ranch. This is like the quality of chicken that you'd get on like an airport salad. It was a really, really low quality chicken. And that just kind of, kind of poisoned the well with this sandwich because I thought they have a decent ranch, but I just thought it was just overall just like kind of not a great combination. And we also. The steak and cheese milk melt. Jesus Christ.

[Nick Wiger]

I.

[Mike Mitchell]

Stop saying melt. Is milk milk.

[Brandy Posey]

Steak and cheese milk is disgusting for us.

[Mike Mitchell]

It does sound really disgusting.

[Nick Wiger]

We just gotta check you in the Milk Mansion for a weekend and get you. You'll be. You'll be fine after that. You won't be making these mistakes.

[Mike Mitchell]

Anyway. Check out a brandy special melt job.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, get milked on YouTube.

[Mike Mitchell]

Steak and cheese melt, shaved steak, provolone, brown sugar, caramelized onion and peppers. I thought this was also pretty gross.

[Nick Wiger]

This is bad.

[Brandy Posey]

The brown sugar is off. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

What are we doing? Why are we doing that?

[Nick Wiger]

Wait, the brown sugar was in. It was. It was in.

[Mike Mitchell]

Was the caramelized onions were brown sugar caramels.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, weird.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Here's another thing. The protein is just bad in it.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's really low quality.

[Nick Wiger]

Steak is bad.

[Mike Mitchell]

And that's. That's its main sin.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

And I can tell you. Look, we know that. What the. Did Jersey make Bain Capital or where the it got bought by.

[Mike Mitchell]

It got bought by Bain Capital. Was the Mitt Romney one. I believe it got bought by. No, not Rourke Capital, though. That's another one that buys up a bunch of restaurants. I believe is Blackstone.

[Amelia Marino]

Blackstone. Blackrock.

[Brandy Posey]

Blackstone.

[Mike Mitchell]

Blackstone. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay. Bain. Bain doesn't own Jersey Mike's.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, that's a. That's a plus.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. You adopted Mike Sway.

[Nick Wiger]

I was born in it. That was good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Look, we're referencing Ken Bone. We're doing bane impressions.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I know.

[Nick Wiger]

It might as well be that 2009.

[Mike Mitchell]

Exactly.

[Brandy Posey]

Chickens making more sense.

[Mike Mitchell]

Now the chicken is making more sense.

[Nick Wiger]

Or 2016 was Campone, but still this. That is Almost. The line where I'm like, that's chicken strip. Started to go away right around then.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah. Coincidence. I think.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't. I think Kim bone had something to do with it. I. The steakums are bad in this steak and cheese.

[Mike Mitchell]

They were really bad.

[Brandy Posey]

They're really bad and a little. Little. Just chewy in a weird way. Yeah, yeah. No, it was gross.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like provolone, and I like that they have their default cheese. There is provolone. I think they have a decent provolone, but I mean, it just wasn't enough to. Even the melted quality was not enough to salv this poor quality protein. Another lto. And I didn't realize this, but this was one that I think we all agreed was hidden. The Mac and cheese.

[Brandy Posey]

Yes.

[Mike Mitchell]

Which is extra cheesy cream Mac and cheese made with cavatappi noodles. I was like. I was going in. I was like, okay, let's see what you got. Mac and cheese. Especially because this is one of the bites I have later in the meal. And I'm eating as like, this is one of the better things I've gotten from Jersey, without a doubt. Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. I'll just say that the highlights today were not the sandwiches. They were everything else.

[Mike Mitchell]

Chips, which I agree. I agree.

[Nick Wiger]

Are not from Firehouse Mike's.

[Mike Mitchell]

The chips from the headcomb kitchen highlight.

[Brandy Posey]

And you mean firehouse. Yeah.

[Emma Erdbrink]

You've been saying. I think both of you have been saying Jersey Mike.

[Mike Mitchell]

Did I say Jersey Mike?

[Brandy Posey]

I think a little bit.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I think.

[Mike Mitchell]

How many times did I say Jersey Mike?

[Brandy Posey]

Maybe just once.

[Nick Wiger]

You're fine. Everything's fine.

[Emma Erdbrink]

It's okay.

[Amelia Marino]

Wait.

[Mike Mitchell]

Let's. Let's. Let's. Mitch. Well, let's just each say firehouse subs clean and then Emma can dub it over when we say Jersey mics.

[Nick Wiger]

Firehouse Subs Firehouse Mics Subs Put that in for me.

[Mike Mitchell]

Firehouse Subs Firehouse Subs Firehouse. Firehouse Subs Firehouse Subs Firehouse Subs we're not.

[Nick Wiger]

We're not losing. This is. This is our first record of the week. Our brain should be.

[Mike Mitchell]

No excuse.

[Nick Wiger]

Our brain should be working today. They're not working.

[Brandy Posey]

Too much milk on the brain, I feel like is what's happening.

[Mike Mitchell]

Too much milk on the brain.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't drink it anymore. I need to start. I need to re. Drink milk. Milk. I put it in a sketch a long time ago where I put it in a Mountain Dew bottle, but I. But I. But I don't think I drank it since that sketch I haven't drank like a glass of milk since I did a sketch about it 14 years ago or whatever.

[Brandy Posey]

I did the gallon milk challenge in college. It failed, but I was challenged to it by a guy that was like, mind one of my friends over? And I was. Was like, sure, but we'll do it at your place. And then I just puked all over his bathroom and said, I guess you win. And I walked out.

[Nick Wiger]

That's good as hell.

[Mike Mitchell]

Power move. Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. It felt great.

[Nick Wiger]

Wait, we never. We didn't get into Price is Right stuff as much. But you were there when Drew took over, right? Basically.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I guess there's nothing else to.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's not a ton a favorite game. Did you ever get to play them?

[Brandy Posey]

No, I just kind of was sequestered.

[Nick Wiger]

Because you.

[Mike Mitchell]

Were you just working the makeup department? Department, yeah. Were you given makeup to. Because I guess Barker's beauties weren't there anymore. But like, were you, like, was the makeup team responsible primarily for the cast makeup or were also you. You can't have been doing guests.

[Brandy Posey]

No, no.

[Mike Mitchell]

Cast cast.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah. There was like a couple makeup team

[Nick Wiger]

would usually do the. Me, the page. They would get my makeup done just because they wanted me to look a little bit better walking around.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Because you want to do the contestants. They would come on down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

But in some shows that have like, contestants who are like, backstage, I know they'll. They'll run them through the.

[Nick Wiger]

Here's a barker beauty sitting right next to me.

[Brandy Posey]

Jimmy.

[Mike Mitchell]

Aw, little Jimmy.

[Brandy Posey]

We love Jimmy.

[Mike Mitchell]

I wish Bob Barker had felt me up. Horny southern belle.

[Nick Wiger]

What the hell?

[Brandy Posey]

If you're spayed, then Bob would have loved you.

[Mike Mitchell]

He did love Petsby and Spade and Neuter.

[Amelia Marino]

She is Spade.

[Brandy Posey]

Bob would have loved you. Love to rip out dogs. Genitals. His legacy above all.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm a spade dog, so you can raw dog Jimmy.

[Nick Wiger]

Jesus Jammy.

[Mike Mitchell]

So crass. Here's what I like. The Mac and cheese, which I thought was. Was great. And you're taking home to go like the leftovers.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm taking some home too.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's a testament to it. I thought the pickle. I think their pickles are good. And I like that you get a pickle spear with every sandwich. And the other sandwich I ordered for myself was a 4 inch tuna on wheat. And I thought that that tuna was pretty good.

[Amelia Marino]

Really?

[Mike Mitchell]

It's one of their only cold subs and I. I really enjoyed it. It's. It's like just, like a. Just a Good quality tuna. Tuna salad. I like that it's made with provolone. I'm comparing it to Jersey Mike's. And I mean, I was like, this is on par with Jersey Mike's. I don't think it's quite up to the level of Jimmy John's, which I think is a better tuna. And that's the one place I'll give. I'll give Jimmy John some, Some particular praise. But I, I, I thought it was a quality tuna. And if that was. That had been my one sandwich, and it had the Mac and cheese and it had the cookies, which we'll get to, I'd be be like, I don't know. This place is all right. It's the, it's the specials that kind of knocked it down for me. Brandy, you also got yourself a smoked turkey and provolone.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it was pretty good. I find their bread to be pretty subpar.

[Mike Mitchell]

As far as the bread's not great.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, no, it's not great. I like a Jersey Mike's bread better. I almost like a Jimmy John's bread better. Honestly.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, honestly.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't like Jimmy John's, but I get where you're. I get where you're.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think you do like their bread better. And they have, they also have the sandwich bread. You can get there just like, there's just like, the sliced bread. Bread. The multigrain at Jimmy John's and, And that I'd refer to what they have at Firehouse.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I like, I like that quite a bit. It was like, it was fine. It was sliced thin enough, so I appreciated that provolone as well. I think of the sandwiches that we tried, that was my favorite of, of of the ones by far. The two specials were a real nightmare

[Mike Mitchell]

if you're gonna make it. So if you're going out to get a sandwich at a chain, you're. You're getting Jersey Mike's or, or. Or a place in, in that category. If you're making a sandwich on your own. Own. What's your go to sandwich?

[Brandy Posey]

I mean, I like a big multigrain, like, real thick bread. I like a sprout because a sprout makes me feel fancy.

[Mike Mitchell]

Love sprouts.

[Brandy Posey]

Love a sprout on a sandwich. I like. I put chips on sandwiches a lot too. I like a crunch. I'm very into, like, the textures of one of these.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't. Do. I. I think that the. I think that the Firehouse subs sandwiches are very soft.

[Brandy Posey]

Yes. I added to my. It helped quite a Bit I was gonna.

[Nick Wiger]

Because I don't, I don't usually put chips on sandwiches, but I, but I like to have chips, crunch them while I'm in the sandwich. But this place specifically, like you're eating a Jersey Mike sandwich, for instance, you're getting the crunch of the veggies and stuff like that, which you can get here, but they just seem like the bread and everything just seems so soft and. Yeah, I, you know what? This is funny. I think today is the day I learned that Firehouse subs is maybe just kind of shitty. I don't think I ever thought of this before. I think I kind of thought it was good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Let me say, let me, let me to make this remark because we've observed the insidification of everything since our last review. It was acquired by Burger King's parent company, which would explain the erosion in quality, that they're just like kind of, you know, whatever, cheaping out a little bit to, to increase margins. When we reviewed it in 2018 with Mary Sohn, I gave it a four and you gave it a three. Three forks three times. Now, I, without spoiling our, our fork score wars. Mine's going to be nowhere near that today. But is it possible that firehouse, which I used to get regularly on my own, was just better at a certain point? And maybe, maybe partly it was a pandemic, maybe partly was the acquisition by, you know, this, this, this a private equity firm. But I, I, whatever it is, it's just sort of like this, this place is, it has gotten shittier.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. You know, I got.

[Mike Mitchell]

Totally possible.

[Nick Wiger]

I got this, that steamer sandwich today. I do like that steamer sandwich, but I do, I think you, it could just be shittier. Wait, I can't tell if the bread is shittier. Like, like the bread is never been. Yeah, it's always been strange, Brad.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. It's never stood out to me before.

[Nick Wiger]

But it was better than Subway, right? Like we're saying, like, this place is better than Subway.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's still better than Subway, but you compared it to Brandy, you compared it to Quiznos, and I would say we, we, we. It w. Watched a similar slow slide into mediocrity with Quiznos, where you like, I remember Quiznos back in the day. He like, hey, Quiznos is like, pretty good. Actually, Quiznos is a notch above Subway. And I'm like, I don't know, it's maybe, maybe just a more expensive Subway.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, well, I think Quiznos, Quiznos, when they, they did like, the sliced deli meat, like, hot sandwiches, those still were pretty good. It is like it is the fake chicken, the chunky. The chunky chewy meat that become the problem there.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Cuz I'm not.

[Nick Wiger]

And they at least would toast that. I guess that's maybe another thing is like maybe tasted like a little toastier or whatever. It felt like it firmed it up a little bit. I don't. I have no idea.

[Brandy Posey]

Remember when Subway was like we can toast it. I promise we can do it too.

[Mike Mitchell]

They put toasting ovens in there real quick. And it kind of ate and then

[Nick Wiger]

kind of killed quizos. I mean also lo the location issue with Quiznos too. Firehouse has that similar problem of that like firehouse subs are fewer and far. Subway still more convenient than. Than firehouse subs. Right?

[Brandy Posey]

Like a toos. Have you done toos?

[Mike Mitchell]

We have done to. It's been, it's been a while since we've done toos. That's a place that's. That's really received eating.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

There are a lot fewer togos than there used to be. But I like togos.

[Nick Wiger]

Just our whole thing. Fast food just sucks.

[Mike Mitchell]

Everything sucks.

[Nick Wiger]

It sucks so bad. I almost got the Wendy's spicy chicken sandwich last night because I want to just try the new one. That's like an al monstrosity. And I'm so mad about it that they ch. Wendy's is like the saddest story to me. And fast Wendy's is. It's a mess. And I'm like they changed the one thing that was still working. They changed their spicy chicken sandwich. Like changing the bit Big Mac. I've said this before. It's like changing your Big Mac. Why the did you do this? And I couldn't even bring myself to do it. I just, I, I. Everything has gotten so much worse. But I do wonder with firehouse subs, which what is the. What's the connection with. They give money to fire to firehouses. Is that what it is?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes. I believe a portion.

[Nick Wiger]

You're gonna see any of these guys shirtless or what? What's the deal? Let's see the hunks with their shirts off.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't know if they take their shirts off, but I believe a portion of their. Their proceeds go to firefighter related charities.

[Brandy Posey]

I believe they get free subs on 911 too.

[Mike Mitchell]

Right?

[Nick Wiger]

That's pretty good.

[Mike Mitchell]

And if you go before 9 11, you get one as well. The day after.

[Brandy Posey]

The day after. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like to swing by a bunch of different.

[Brandy Posey]

Imagine showing up the day before and Then being like, oh, we. Technically, we're not supposed to.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm a firefighter. All right.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Amelia Marino]

Real firefighters we're gonna get.

[Emma Erdbrink]

So you can use your imagination.

[Mike Mitchell]

These firefighters are in full garb. I mean, that's. This isn't doing me any favors. How can I jack off to this?

[Emma Erdbrink]

Life finds a way.

[Brandy Posey]

I wish their sandwiches had fun names. I think that would be helpful.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, the one fun name, Mitch, is the New York steamer, which is the one you got. This is corned beef brisket, pastrami, melted provolone, deli, mustard, mayo, and Italian dressing. I didn't have any of this, but I've had this sandwich before. In fact, last time we reviewed it, I got a New York steamer myself. Myself.

[Nick Wiger]

It's still okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's.

[Nick Wiger]

It's. It's like, it's. I just am now being like, there were a lot of elements of these sandwiches today that reminded me of Subway. And I was like, was this always just a little bit better than Subway and not, like, not that great? Cause, like, the hot. The steak and cheeses from Jersey Mike's are way better than.

[Mike Mitchell]

Way better.

[Nick Wiger]

Way, way, way, way better.

[Mike Mitchell]

And even shouldn't be, because they do more hot sandwiches at Firehouse.

[Nick Wiger]

And, And. And like, we said that. That they've been bought by. Not Bain Capital, but whatever it is Jersey. So it's like, so they're getting worse, but they still are a big step above Firehouse up. So I, I, I, I, I. I'm confused because I didn't give it four forks back in the day, but I feel like I was, like, close. I still kind of liked it.

[Brandy Posey]

Well, I wonder if, like, because Jersey Mike's too, like, they're cutting everything fresh for you. I wonder what the packaging situation is with the firehouse.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I mean, that's the disadvantage of not going in person. So I didn't get to witness the preparation. I mean, they used. They would make it in front of you like any sandwich shop, so. But I wonder how fresh the ingredients are. No idea.

[Brandy Posey]

They got little bins of meat.

[Mike Mitchell]

Probably got. I mean, my memory is they have. They have bins. They. They never slice the meat to order.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, man. Wait, so hold on. What is the connection to. What is the connection to the. They just give money to firefighters.

[Mike Mitchell]

It was founded by firefighters. Oh, it's fire.

[Nick Wiger]

It was founded by fire support.

[Mike Mitchell]

Firefighting related causes.

[Brandy Posey]

I do think it's a.

[Nick Wiger]

That would be a pretty sexy scene. A fire at Milk Mansion. We got those firehouse sub guys going in there with the Milk mansion, ladies.

[Brandy Posey]

Fire hose is full of milk.

[Nick Wiger]

Spray me down. That'd be fantastic.

[Mike Mitchell]

As long as they're yelling insults at me, I'm fine with that.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Get out of the way. We're trying to pe the fire all worked up.

[Mike Mitchell]

Idiot. That's what I wanted.

[Brandy Posey]

I do think it's a better sandwich than cop sandwich, which is a horrible other.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Place.

[Mike Mitchell]

Cop sandwich.

[Nick Wiger]

Cop sandwich is not great.

[Brandy Posey]

Not great. We don't like it. Cop roll.

[Mike Mitchell]

I mean, they treat me great at cop sandwich.

[Nick Wiger]

I won't even go to. To ice subs.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'll go to ice subs.

[Nick Wiger]

I go to ice subs. I don't support.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't support it, but I'll go there. Yeah, but then I'll like. I'll steal a bag of chips. Hell,

[Nick Wiger]

take that patriarchy. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, take that patriarchy. Ice subs. Weirdly good ice. They have very good. They have a good pellet ice. Yeah, it's really, really, really high quality stuff.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I mean, if you're gonna have something,

[Mike Mitchell]

the very least, you gotta do that.

[Nick Wiger]

Cop sandwiches. Yeah. None of these places fire. Look. Firehouse sub is better than those. Than those other two.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, sure.

[Brandy Posey]

First responders. PETA palace is not great.

[Nick Wiger]

First responders is bad. First responders is no good.

[Brandy Posey]

I like Emma.

[Mike Mitchell]

Amelia, how are your sandos?

[Amelia Marino]

I ate half of mine. I enjoyed it. I'm gonna take the other half home. I used to get firehouse all the time in college, and it does feel like the sandwiches have gotten significantly smaller. Like I used to get a sandwich and I felt like I could eat half for dinner tonight and the other half for dinner tomorrow. Tomorrow. This sandwich does not feel that way. It feels much smaller than, like a jersey.

[Nick Wiger]

Mike, four incher is pretty. Is that a mini at Jersey or.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, huge four incher.

[Nick Wiger]

I mean, I'm saying four does. Isn't. Is a mini at Jersey Mics. Is that five inches? It's. I don't even think it is.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't. I don't know. I don't forget in terms of.

[Nick Wiger]

Of I think the regulars. 8 inches and then.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, it's. It's 4 inches. 8 inches and 12 inches are the three sizes at Firehouse and. Oh, yeah, but, but, but I think also within the sandwiches themselves, they may just be using less protein. But Emma, which sandwiches you get?

[Amelia Marino]

I got the turkey and provolone, no onion.

[Mike Mitchell]

So you both got the same sand?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Mine was mid.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, it's like. It's like that because that's a baseline Jersey. Mike's order for me and you as well.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah. If I was to, like. If I was sitting at home, like, I want to sub for dinner. I think I'm going to get Jersey Mike Mike's. Because it feels like more bang for my buck. It's a bigger sandwich. I like it better.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, it feels fresher.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I like getting it Mike's way. Yeah, I like that there's a way

[Nick Wiger]

Jersey Mike wipes the floor with firehouse subs. Who are we kidding?

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Come on.

[Mike Mitchell]

I just thought of a character.

[Nick Wiger]

What's that?

[Mike Mitchell]

Jersey Mike DeLorean. This is the Mike's way.

[Nick Wiger]

That's a character.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, that's what he says.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know if it's a character.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay, well, it's like a thing that he would say.

[Nick Wiger]

Are you gonna see Mandalorian and Grogu?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I'm going. Huh? Yeah. Out of grim curiosity. I'll see it. I don't think I'm gonna like it.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, Yeah. I don't. I doubt you can like it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Where are you on Star Wars Casual? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I like. I like. I like the movies. I like it as an event. There's a lot of it now, and I just haven't kept it up, so it doesn't feel special. And I. It's not. I don't think it's for me. So I'm kind of just like, whatever.

[Mike Mitchell]

You don't need to watch anything.

[Nick Wiger]

Can I ask you what you think of jersey Mike DeLorean? This is Mike's way. What do you think of that?

[Brandy Posey]

Well, do you think it's a practical puppet or do you think it's a CGI situation?

[Nick Wiger]

That's a great question.

[Mike Mitchell]

Practical. It's got to be practical.

[Brandy Posey]

Okay. Just making sure because Grogu was. They were initially going to CGI him.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, man, I hate Grogu so much. I do like. I do like the fact that Grogu is a puppet.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like the practical.

[Nick Wiger]

That is. That is helpful. That is helpful, too. Thing I think sucks.

[Brandy Posey]

Berner Herzog loves the puppet.

[Mike Mitchell]

He does so much.

[Brandy Posey]

He's kind of the reason they didn't cgi.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think he doesn't really know what Yoda is. He just like the puppet in of itself. Yeah, I like that. Yeah, I love that.

[Nick Wiger]

Warner Herog doesn't know what Yoda is. Great.

[Mike Mitchell]

We.

[Brandy Posey]

We.

[Mike Mitchell]

The cookies was.

[Emma Erdbrink]

So.

[Mike Mitchell]

One of the ltos is the. The Limit Time offerings is the double chocolate chip cookie, which a highlight for me. There's a really good cookie cookie and I'm not a double chocolate guy. I'm also not a white chocolate second.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, okay. Double chocolate.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Because you love the double chunk chocolate.

[Mike Mitchell]

I do love the double chunk chocolate cookie.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

But that's.

[Nick Wiger]

Sorry.

[Mike Mitchell]

Double chunk chocolate cookie.

[Nick Wiger]

They're gone. They're done. You said they were gonna be around forever.

[Emma Erdbrink]

The.

[Nick Wiger]

The Costco guys are still alive.

[Mike Mitchell]

Has their moment passed?

[Nick Wiger]

They're gone. No.

[Brandy Posey]

You can get one at Costco. Still.

[Nick Wiger]

Honestly, the Rizzler is kind of gone. I'm sorry.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Bristle's gonna come back a few years

[Nick Wiger]

when he's like 15. He's hitting the teen years. It's not good. Things are not going to be good.

[Mike Mitchell]

All I know is, I'm telling you, whenever. Whenever AJ has his funeral, I'll be there going boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Out of respect, Big justice and Rizzler will be with us for a long time.

[Nick Wiger]

Of course. I hope so, though.

[Amelia Marino]

The.

[Mike Mitchell]

The double ch.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm not sure if you're going to be. I don't know if you're going to. AJ's going to die before.

[Mike Mitchell]

I might not outlive AJ.

[Brandy Posey]

That's a goal. That's nice to have a goal, though, like that. You know, the.

[Mike Mitchell]

The. The chocolate chip.

[Nick Wiger]

I'll be there for when Rizzler turns 18. I'll be there to watch him vote for Trump for his first time.

[Brandy Posey]

His voice starts cracking.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Maybe you shouldn't be tracking Rizzler's 18th birthday.

[Brandy Posey]

That's a Much less.

[Nick Wiger]

I got a website that's counting down the days.

[Mike Mitchell]

The chocolate chip cookie and oatmeal cookie and the seasonal cookie, which is the aforementioned double chocolate chip cookie, not a double chunk chocolate cookie. I think it's. I think these cookies are all great and we should have. I shouldn't say great. I think they're all very good. And I think that for whatever reason we now associate. Maybe it's Subways doing. We now associate sandwiches with the sandwich shops, with having good cookies. And they do have quality cookies here. And that is a plus. A definite, definite boost to its. For.

[Nick Wiger]

We should make like Michael. We should make Jared the movie Jared. And it goes up. It goes right up until. When he becomes the spokesperson for Subway. And then it ends.

[Mike Mitchell]

Doesn't. Doesn't mention any of the child pornography stuff. Never gets into that. If it's. If it's Jared, get that.

[Nick Wiger]

Get him into heaven.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's just him, like, being kind to him.

[Brandy Posey]

He like, sees a subway and that's when the movie ends.

[Nick Wiger]

That's good.

[Amelia Marino]

That's good.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, man, we gotta make. We gotta make Jared at some point anyways. Go on, go on. That would be. That would be a funnier die video if you were still over there.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I mean, I probably would have made Jared gotten paid $150.

[Nick Wiger]

I would.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I would have loved to play the role of Jared. It would have been a lot of fun for me. Get paid $50.

[Mike Mitchell]

You think you would have been Jared?

[Nick Wiger]

What the fuck?

[Mike Mitchell]

Maybe before.

[Nick Wiger]

You're. You're a fuck. How dare you? We could use some CGI to make me look like after Jared if that's. What if you think that the weight doesn't work.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, no, no.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Jared also looks like shit.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jared looks like shit. You look better than Jared now.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, thanks. I look better than Jared now.

[Mike Mitchell]

There was a time when Jared.

[Nick Wiger]

Prison Jared.

[Mike Mitchell]

There was a time when Jared was more slim than I am now. There was a time when he was a slender man.

[Nick Wiger]

That's fucking true.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's true. He was very slender.

[Brandy Posey]

He got very skinny there.

[Mike Mitchell]

He got really, really skinny. He had jeans.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, but he wasn't. He wasn't like sk. You're. You're. You are. You.

[Emma Erdbrink]

You.

[Nick Wiger]

You do have body dysmorphia. You are thinner than. You're in better shape than Jared was.

[Mike Mitchell]

Now can we get a side by side with me and Jared?

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, pull it up.

[Brandy Posey]

We're going to need. Where are his pants, by the way?

[Nick Wiger]

Wise bottom good. At the estate sale.

[Amelia Marino]

You.

[Nick Wiger]

You. You look better than that, like freak right now.

[Mike Mitchell]

He's pretty skinny. He's pretty lean there.

[Amelia Marino]

Skinny doesn't necessarily mean either.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, it's true. I mean, I'm. I'm just saying, like, he got pretty slim there. I think you'd have to cast, like, someone with a slender build just for the. The. The visual reference. If you're making the Jared parody, which. Why would you make that? But if you were doing it, who

[Nick Wiger]

the fuck would you. What stunt casting would you get? Who would you get?

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't.

[Brandy Posey]

I'm.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I mean, like, if I. If I was actually casting, I get. Think like Mike Cassidy or something like that. Very good actor who's also got lean but could play it.

[Nick Wiger]

Paul Russell.

[Mike Mitchell]

Very funny, Jared.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

But also, like, I think you could. Yeah. As far as actors in the era, I don't know, they'd probably like get John Heater or something, right?

[Nick Wiger]

Pretty good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

John. He pretty good.

[Mike Mitchell]

Back in the Napoleon Dynamite aftermath.

[Brandy Posey]

John Ham to do it.

[Nick Wiger]

Let's get John Ham to do Ham is In. He definitely is in.

[Mike Mitchell]

Ham does like comedy.

[Nick Wiger]

You know what? Ham does like comedy.

[Brandy Posey]

He really does. Get him to play Jared, then put him in a fat suit. The rest of it, come on, let's push. Let's make him not like comedy.

[Nick Wiger]

It would be. It wouldn't be demeaning at all to come in as the. The body double for like, we're going to CGI Jon Hamm's head on fat body. Oh, co. This is great. We have actually, we have Jared's before pants. They don't fit me. The indignities that you fucking suffer doing all this fucking bullshit anyways. Jared looks like shit.

[Mike Mitchell]

Jared looks like shit.

[Amelia Marino]

Looks like shit.

[Mike Mitchell]

A bad man.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, I guess we could say a

[Mike Mitchell]

bad man, but we'll make the biopic. We also have a. They sell sauces there. And we have a bottle of gator sauce, which I figured we could choose Amelia as part of our evaluation. Amelia is this into us right now.

[Brandy Posey]

This is very exciting. I liked that you guys got one of these. I was very happy.

[Mike Mitchell]

So this is.

[Nick Wiger]

Why do you want to cross the camera? You can cross the camera.

[Emma Erdbrink]

I don't want them to see me.

[Nick Wiger]

Very professional.

[Mike Mitchell]

This is a gator hammock. Gator sauce.

[Brandy Posey]

Gator hammock.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. So, I mean, I don't know why the ham. Where the hammock comes from, but we see a gator here. The gator is breathing fire. It says hot.

[Nick Wiger]

It would be funny to see a gator in a hammock.

[Mike Mitchell]

That would be funny. But that's not part of the key.

[Amelia Marino]

Okay.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

The first ingredient is Louisiana style hot sauce.

[Nick Wiger]

That's very funny.

[Mike Mitchell]

They're just using hot sauce as an ingredient.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Is it. Is it crystal?

[Amelia Marino]

Crystal with some other stuff.

[Nick Wiger]

Man, what a fucking. All right, first of all, fast, they, they. They struck out here on the bottle. There's no gator in a hammock. It's just a gator that's just saying hot.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, there's no hammock that sucks. He should be. Why sunglasses and a hammock sucks.

[Nick Wiger]

He did the gator just yelling hot like he. Did he eat something that was hot? He must have ate some of the sauce.

[Mike Mitchell]

Look, I'm gonna put a little. I'm put a little hot sauce on each of these plates. There's also some zesta crackers, and I think Emiles is getting some. Some Mac and cheese as well.

[Nick Wiger]

So this is. This is. This is the firehouse subs official sauce.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's one of their sauces. They have like 12 sauces you can order, but I got this one. Okay. Yeah. So we'll try it out.

[Nick Wiger]

All right, go ahead. Here we go.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm gonna distro this a little bit brandy. How much? Because I'm a bit of a heat seeker. I like a. I like a spicy sauce. Where are you on spicy?

[Amelia Marino]

I like.

[Brandy Posey]

I like spice, but I need to, like, have another flavor. It can't just be hot.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm with you.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I definitely. Because I don't like hot for hot's sake. That's the thing. That's what makes me something of a heat seeker, is that, like, the spice is right.

[Nick Wiger]

The spice is right. You need the spice to be right.

[Mike Mitchell]

Hey, how about that? We work synergy.

[Nick Wiger]

It is nice. It is nice. Synergy.

[Mike Mitchell]

All right, I'm putting just a little bit, little. Little kiddie pool on each of our plates.

[Brandy Posey]

All right.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm gonna pour it onto the Mac and cheese here. And then also we can take forks of the Mac here. Can we hand it over?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. Feel free to distro that if you to want more.

[Brandy Posey]

So it comes out in kind of a glug.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's kind of a glug. It looks like it has some granules in it.

[Amelia Marino]

Yep, yep.

[Mike Mitchell]

Like, it's kind of like. Like coffee grounds in it.

[Brandy Posey]

Basically, get a little finger test first.

[Amelia Marino]

It does look kind of thin, like

[Brandy Posey]

a crystal hot sauce.

[Nick Wiger]

Why you hand me that plate?

[Mike Mitchell]

It is thinner than expected. And here's some. Some forks if anyone wants a.

[Nick Wiger]

It does.

[Mike Mitchell]

Plate.

[Nick Wiger]

It does maybe is just crystal hot sauce. I don't know. Oh, thank you.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

All right, I'm going to take a bite of this Mac and cheese.

[Amelia Marino]

It feels like it should be against the rules to put hot sauce in your hot. Hot sauce like that. I agree. Take the hot sauce or just, like, sell crystal.

[Nick Wiger]

I doused this bad boy. I doused the Mac and cheese in this.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's a lot, lot in that. Trying to crinkle this away from the microphone for the misophoniacs, which we've learned misophonia is real.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, yeah. My boyfriend has it.

[Nick Wiger]

Let me tell you something. Let me tell you something.

[Amelia Marino]

It smells like hot sauce in here.

[Mike Mitchell]

Now.

[Nick Wiger]

I love the Mac and cheese with the hot sauce on it.

[Brandy Posey]

Exciting.

[Mike Mitchell]

This has some real burn to it. I will say. Yeah, I will have to try the Mac and cheese because I'm not sure if a saltine is the best test bed for the sauce. Thank you so much, Brandy.

[Amelia Marino]

Yep. Got it.

[Brandy Posey]

See, I'm excited for this.

[Nick Wiger]

Brandy. And I said we should do the Mac and cheese with the hot sauce. You kind of poo pooed it. I have to say, I was wrong. You were. You were wrong.

[Mike Mitchell]

And I'm. I'm listening and learning.

[Amelia Marino]

In college, I would make, like, a box of Mac and cheese, and I would, like, sit with a bottle of hot sauce and, like, bite for bite, just like. Yeah, I do. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I used to Tabasco the out of mine.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

But these days, I'm not. Not as much of a Tabasco person.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Oh.

[Mike Mitchell]

Although the Tabasco jalapeno, I really like the green one.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, that one's nice.

[Nick Wiger]

It's good.

[Brandy Posey]

No, that's really good. The Mac and cheese with the hot. Hot sauce.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's great.

[Brandy Posey]

That's the. That's the winner. This. If I had this in a cookie. That's great.

[Mike Mitchell]

Pretty damn good gator sauce again. Maybe another mild boost to its fork square.

[Nick Wiger]

Honestly, I mean, look, the sandwiches were bad.

[Mike Mitchell]

Sandwiches were bad. And that's the point of this.

[Nick Wiger]

And were they always bad? I don't know. I truly can't tell. I want more of the Mac and cheese. Is there any left in there?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, there's a little bit left.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Mike Mitchell]

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[Nick Wiger]

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It is like night and day. I'm getting better. More restful sleep. I'm feeling good. I got my CPAP mask on. I'm getting. I'm laying down. I'm falling asleep in seconds.

[Mike Mitchell]

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[Brandy Posey]

I thought I was Beck Bennett.

[Nick Wiger]

No, no, no, no.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Kyle Mooney.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Sorry about that.

[Nick Wiger]

Exactly.

[Brandy Posey]

No, all good.

[Nick Wiger]

All good.

[Brandy Posey]

Thanks, buddy.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

And we host the show what's our podcast here on Headgum.

[Mike Mitchell]

This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help help you stand out and make you look like a kick ass person online.

[Nick Wiger]

Like you're skateboarding through the Internet or you're like you're surfing through the web.

[Mike Mitchell]

Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with

[Brandy Posey]

a professional website, grow your brand and

[Mike Mitchell]

get paid all in one place.

[Nick Wiger]

I like that it's all in one place. I like that I don't have to go around, you know, to like different stores or something.

[Brandy Posey]

It's just all in my. Well, it's like, oh, do I need to go to like a.

[Mike Mitchell]

Do I need another type of website

[Brandy Posey]

to like find the right pictures or to like another type of website to upload?

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, no, it's all in one place.

[Mike Mitchell]

The video or the audio or like.

[Amelia Marino]

No, I want.

[Mike Mitchell]

It makes it easy.

[Brandy Posey]

Make it easy on me, please.

[Nick Wiger]

Yes. And you can do all those things. Photos, videos, changing fonts, you know, I mean, the designs are amazing. They're catering to all your different needs. They're SEO tools, which I know what those are. And their custom domains.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, let's come up with a domain right now.

[Brandy Posey]

Let's see.

[Mike Mitchell]

I wonder if it exists.

[Nick Wiger]

Www.friendsmeeting friends. Friendsmeetingfriends.com that's an original thing that we came up with. Friends meeting friends, friends. Anyway, so check out squarespace.com headgum for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code headgum. Save 10% off your first purchase of

[Brandy Posey]

a website or domain.

[Nick Wiger]

Hell, sounds easy. Anybody could do it.

[Mike Mitchell]

We should get to our final thoughts. So, Brandy, here's how this will work. We should go around, give a closing argument, if you will, on Firehouse Subs. Include, you know, the thoughts from this visit, but any, any thoughts from previous visits if warning warranted and then end by giving that a score from 0 to 5. Forks, your guest, your thoughts, your fork.

[Brandy Posey]

Score on Firehouse Subs okay, so I do think the Mac and cheese was Good. This sauce at least was good. It leads me to think that their other sauces were good, are probably pretty good too. They're doing that well. The cookies were good. Although there is a part of me that wonders because when we got the cookies, we were all disheartened by the sandwiches and the cookies. Cookies boosted our. Our happiness. But I like, if I had just had that without the disappointing sandwiches, I. I still would have liked the cookie, but I think we gave it more than. Than we would have because of how bad the sandwiches were.

[Nick Wiger]

That's fair. We were talking. We were also talking about that the cookies were not hard. We were afraid that they're going to be hard. And we were saying it's rare that a cookie that's hard is good. And I brought up Tate's. Yes, Tate's a good crispy cook cookie. And maybe even more crispy than hard, I guess, like crispy cookie. But normally I like a soft cookie.

[Mike Mitchell]

We love a soft cookie, but also crumble.

[Nick Wiger]

Like the way cookies have gone. Like crumble are like too doughy. We don't love crumble, right?

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, no, it's like a cake.

[Nick Wiger]

But I like. Sometimes I like a cake cookie, but that's just like too, like doughy and kind of gross.

[Amelia Marino]

There's always seem kind of raw.

[Mike Mitchell]

They're also. Yeah, they're like oversized.

[Nick Wiger]

And that's why I think these cookies were like. They were decent. They were decent cookies. They were decent.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

And oatmeal raisin was really good. And I don't usually say that very often, so I really was good with that. Um, I mean, I think I'm going to. I think I'm going to give it. God, it feels. I'm going to give this a 2.5 because I think that the cookie, the Mac and cheese is. They were. They were good. This, the sandwich is below average. I think they pull it back up because it would be a two.

[Nick Wiger]

Two.

[Brandy Posey]

But then we have heroes involved, so I think we throw in that extra half.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's nice.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Two forks, two tines.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I went three and three quarters last time we were here. I didn't go into the 4.

[Mike Mitchell]

4.

[Nick Wiger]

I didn't. I did not put it into the golden play Club. And I think I was right. Wise. I was the holdout, and I think I was right then.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, you weren't the holdout. But Mary went lower.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, she did? Well, we were right and you were wrong, I guess is what we're.

[Mike Mitchell]

Mary was more right. How about. Okay, she went Lower than you. So she was righter than you.

[Nick Wiger]

She was righter than me. Mary was righter than me. You were the most wrong. But Mary was fine.

[Mike Mitchell]

I was the most wrong. I was also wrong about the hot sauce and the Mac and cheese. We should.

[Brandy Posey]

We're good.

[Mike Mitchell]

We were right to do it.

[Nick Wiger]

But you know what? They were wrong because the hot sauce won him a lot of points, but the gator just yelling hot on the bottle. I mean, step it up.

[Mike Mitchell]

That does suck. Hot.

[Amelia Marino]

Hot.

[Nick Wiger]

That's what you get. The gator yelling hot. You want that? You need more. You need them in the hammock. The. But it is. It's a good hot sauce. Firefighters are good. I like that they celebrate 911 day, and I like that they said that they. I like that they. No one calls it 911 day. I like that they celebrate 911 day.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like that, they like to celebrate 9 11.

[Nick Wiger]

I like that they. I like that. I like that they give subs to firefighters on 911 11. I like that they give Michaels and Mike's free subs. I think that's fun.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like that too.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm eating mine in heaven.

[Mike Mitchell]

Hey, Michael, pass me a bite.

[Nick Wiger]

Who's that? Oh, God, Me too. Spacy. He's up there.

[Brandy Posey]

No free subs for Kevin.

[Nick Wiger]

I. I just. I. I think that this was hurt by the ltos that we had. They can't. They got to do something with their proteins. Their proteins are not good. That new grilled chicken is legit bad. Tastes like hospital food. And we're. We're not. We're past that. The country is past stripped cheap, stripped chicken, chip chicken breast. It's over. You can't. That can't be your new LTO in 2026. It just. It does not work. And the same for the fucking steakums with the steak and cheese. That both did not work.

[Mike Mitchell]

The.

[Nick Wiger]

The steamer was still. The New York steam steamer was still good, so. Or good enough. So for me, I'm gonna go. This is almost generous, but I'm gonna go. Three forks.

[Mike Mitchell]

The name New York steamer is funny. We should acknowledge that.

[Nick Wiger]

It's true.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's the one name that is actually at all any sort of effort. All the rest are like. Like, you know, the. The. The furthest they go is the engineer, and that's a turkey, provolone, and savory mushrooms.

[Brandy Posey]

They're.

[Mike Mitchell]

They're mostly just alien.

[Nick Wiger]

Is that what it's a reference to?

[Mike Mitchell]

No, I think it's the guy on the fire truck.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, fire. Yeah, that's right. Okay, there.

[Brandy Posey]

Stop, drop and roll is right there.

[Mike Mitchell]

Stop, drop and roll is right there.

[Nick Wiger]

That is great.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's wonderful. And. But they also got like just the Italian and the turkey bacon ranch or whatever. So some of those are kind of generic. I don't love the inconsistency. See, I certainly don't love the inconsistency of the sandwiches themselves. The steak and cheese melt was. Melt was just straight up bad. And the maybe it was. Maybe steak and cheese milk would be better. Maybe that's why I keep fro and slipping it. And I also think the, the chicken

[Nick Wiger]

and cheddar rancher milk would be better. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I don't know. Then this melt. This is a pretty bad melt.

[Nick Wiger]

It's a. It was a horrible melt.

[Mike Mitchell]

Also.

[Nick Wiger]

It wasn't even a melt. In what way?

[Mike Mitchell]

It's not even a melt. You can't call that a melt.

[Nick Wiger]

And also, you know what really stood out, I got to. To say it? Jersey Mike's. They're putting those vegetables on the flat iron. They're getting steamed up and chopped up. This thing just felt like the vegetables were plopped on top there and they're

[Mike Mitchell]

using their caramelizing it in brown sugar for some reason. The,

[Nick Wiger]

the.

[Mike Mitchell]

The chicken cheddar rancher, again we've remarked on the really, really low quality chicken that was just such a, such a millstone around its neck. I do like the pickles. I didn't have any of steamer, but I've had that before. I do think that the tuna sandwich was. Was decent and I thought that the Mac and cheese was great. The cookies were very good. Gator sauce. I am, I'm a fan of and they are heroes. I gave cop subs one fork and I gave ice subs four forks. But again, I like really like.

[Brandy Posey]

You love the ice.

[Mike Mitchell]

Really like the ice? Yeah, the ice was great and they're really. Plus.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Where are you going to stand on this? You don't believe 911 happen. So this is.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I'm a. I'm a 911 denier.

[Brandy Posey]

You're taking their money at the door.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, no, I, I don't know. I mean this is. This is a pretty. This is a pretty bad effort. I would go one and a half forks based off the sandwiches just because I don't think it's quite at one fork because based off of the tuna and then people's responses to the turkey being fine. But the gator subs sauce, sorry, the gator sauce, the Mac and cheese and the cookie are enough for an additional at least Tine. And then you get another time for them being heroes. So two forks. That's where I land.

[Nick Wiger]

Two forks. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Scathing wise. You cut your review in half.

[Mike Mitchell]

I mean, this was. This was bad. Would you go back here based on this? I wouldn't. Why would I go back to Firehouse unless it was another Again for content.

[Nick Wiger]

I. I gotta say this. I think that they should give free sub subs to Michael on that specific day. And if your last name is Randazizi, they should give you a free sub as well.

[Mike Mitchell]

You should get free subs.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah. He should get Renaissance. He should get a free sub on 911. Yeah, firehouse subs. You should give Steve Ranazizi a free sub on 911.

[Mike Mitchell]

That. That's what the. The. You know, when that scandal came out, that was the whole thing. It was like, I can't get free subs on 911.

[Brandy Posey]

Now, come on, we got a party sub every year. That's what he got, is the free one he asked for.

[Mike Mitchell]

All right, that was a review of Firehouse subs. It's time for a segment. I've got a mystery beverage. And Mitch and Brandy must guess what it is. It's the return of the WYR Challenge.

[Nick Wiger]

Wow.

[Mike Mitchell]

You are each being handed a glass of something ice cold. It is a cold glass. And feel free to describe this hue. Feel free to describe the. The viscosity. And then any. Any other sensory elements.

[Brandy Posey]

You're getting Baja Blast colored.

[Nick Wiger]

It's Baja Blast colored. And it is bubbling. So. So that. That makes me feel like it could be ba. Baja Blast. It's the. It is. Yeah. It's the color of Baja. It's a. This kind of aquamarine color.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. Like a light. Like a blue Gatorade meets a Mountain Dew.

[Nick Wiger]

And also the color smells like Baja Blast a little bit, too.

[Brandy Posey]

Is this the sugar free Baja Blast? Because I know that happens.

[Nick Wiger]

It is sugar free Baja Blast. This is. This is the quickest that we've ever. Me and the guest. I mean, this is a tie also,

[Brandy Posey]

by the way, is my favorite.

[Nick Wiger]

We just knocked. We just knocked this the fuck out of the park right here. Baja Blast 0. 0. This is Baja Blast.

[Mike Mitchell]

You both think Baja Blast 0?

[Brandy Posey]

I think so. Hold on.

[Mike Mitchell]

Or.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Baja Blast 0. I do not think. I don't think it's regular Baja Blast.

[Brandy Posey]

No.

[Mike Mitchell]

No.

[Brandy Posey]

I don't think there's sugar in it.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, it's the tie, but. Go on.

[Nick Wiger]

Is it regular Baja Blast?

[Brandy Posey]

I'm not getting the.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm not getting the Extra sugar flavor. But it might. I'm now one.

[Brandy Posey]

I don't think there's a diet. I think it just goes straight to zero.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, yeah. No, that is true.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's not a diet.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

There's not a diet of it.

[Nick Wiger]

He's playing so coy that it's making me be like, is this just regular Baja Blast?

[Brandy Posey]

I don't think it is. I think it's.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm giving you my poker face. My papa poke poker face.

[Nick Wiger]

I'm gonna go Baja.

[Mike Mitchell]

You like Lady Gaga?

[Amelia Marino]

My brother loves Lady Gaga. Randomly, he, like, will listen to her songs.

[Nick Wiger]

This is very tough because my mind is changing as I'm. As I'm drinking it.

[Brandy Posey]

I know the zero is good because I do get Baja Bless zero, but it's also, like, I'm used to it from a fountain drink, which is more bubbly, so it's making it difficult to, like, really parse it out.

[Nick Wiger]

I think this is original Baja Blast. I've changed my mind.

[Mike Mitchell]

Which is pivoted to original Baja Blast.

[Nick Wiger]

And you still think zero? It's hard. It is genuinely hard to tell.

[Brandy Posey]

Good zero. I know it's. I'm gonna. I'm gonna say zero, because I'm not getting, like, not getting the little sugar feeling in the back of my brain right now. So I think it's zero.

[Mike Mitchell]

You are correct. That is Baja Blast. Heavy Mitch wins the Weiger challenge. This is full sugar Baja Blast. Well fought.

[Amelia Marino]

The one from the can, Randy, though,

[Mike Mitchell]

immediately clocks that might be it. It might just be from the can is enough for it to taste a little bit different. A little different, because I only ever have it from the tap.

[Nick Wiger]

I thought it was either one of two things. I thought it was Baja Blast or there's a Gatorade that is this exact color. That's not. It's not a glacier freeze. It's another one Brandy.

[Mike Mitchell]

Immediately clocking that it was Baja Blast colored. I love that. I love that. That's how you describe that as the

[Brandy Posey]

color of Baja Blast. I love it so much. Yes, but.

[Mike Mitchell]

But it's like, I. I. I was worried you both were going to overthink it to. To away from Baja Blast, but you. But no, you stuck to that. It is very much Baja Blast.

[Nick Wiger]

It's undeniably Baja Blast. But you know what's funny is I was like. At first, when I first took a sip, it, I was like, it's zero. And then I was like, wait, let that just sit in my teeth. I could just feel it sitting in my teeth. And that did that. I could feel the sugar rotting my teeth. But it was Baja Blast Zero is good. That's the tricky thing. They do a good job with it.

[Mike Mitchell]

That's a lesson like using the full clock on who Wants to Be a Millionaire. Don't just say locked in right away. Take a moment to think it through.

[Brandy Posey]

Take a bit, sit with it. Baja Blast zero. What I drank the entire time I was editing. Millions milk job.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Which you can find on YouTube.

[Mike Mitchell]

Great beverage.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. It's like, honestly, perfect editing beverage.

[Mike Mitchell]

What's your Taco Bell order?

[Brandy Posey]

It's changed.

[Nick Wiger]

Baja Blast 0 is in there.

[Brandy Posey]

Baja Blast 0 is in There.

[Nick Wiger]

But do you ever do the Baja Blast Freeze? Those are.

[Brandy Posey]

Love the freeze.

[Nick Wiger]

Very fun.

[Brandy Posey]

Really love the freeze. When I. We painted my house, I did. I got freezes for us. I'm doing outdoor yard. I have a block. I have a Taco Bell two blocks away from my house. So every time I bring outdoor yard work, I get a Baja Blast Freeze. It really is like, just a little treat. I'm a big nachos Belgrande, but I also get a potato soft taco. And then I pop that on there because I want the extra potatoes in there. But the meal is, like, disappeared from the menu now, which is like, it's just a la carte now that. Now the deal's all up. I don't like it, but I'd like. I like the chalupa meal with. With ground beef and then again a soft taco. Soft taco with it usually.

[Nick Wiger]

So I like going ground beef for my. As my protein there.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think ground beef is better than the steak generally.

[Brandy Posey]

Or I'll.

[Mike Mitchell]

Or I'll throw in beans or, like

[Nick Wiger]

chicken beans if I want. Taco Bell also does have kind of the. The.

[Brandy Posey]

I've never had their chicken because I assume that it's the weird.

[Nick Wiger]

It's kind of like that chicken, but it's in so much sauce. And also probably better, by the way. But it's just in so much sauce. But I'll get the chicken as, like a special. Like, it's like the chicken melts burrito or something. I'll get. Like. I don't. I'm not even thinking of the right thing. But, like, I like. I'll get it if it's in a bere. Like a specialty burrito.

[Mike Mitchell]

Sometimes the beans is honestly the protein I want the most. And, like, I think. I think it's really good. But yes, the. I. I like that you shouted out the. The potato soft taco bean boy, you

[Nick Wiger]

said instead of Burger Boy, Bean Boy is maybe better for you.

[Mike Mitchell]

Can it be the Burger Boy and the Bean Boy? Just either.

[Nick Wiger]

You got to choose one.

[Mike Mitchell]

The Burger Boy, the Bean Boy, Tiger. Nick Wagger.

[Nick Wiger]

Can I ask. Can I ask why it was it this? Because there were leftover Baja blasts from when the Taco Bell people visit us.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Well, I had no. I had those, like, in the hopper for. For a bit to do for a Wagyu challenge.

[Nick Wiger]

And the Baja Blast.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah. The mountain. Yeah. In the cans.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like it. And you picked the perfect guest for it.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

I also, by the way, I think that I would clear clean up, but now I'm like, ooh. Because every time I'm watching one of these videos on YouTube and they're taking sips and there's other sodas of the sodas, and then they get diet confused with regular. I'm like, how are you getting confused with regular? This was one of the first times where I was like, oh, I actually can't completely tell right now, but I think I would clean up at that soda challenge. It would have to be sodas that I actually knew, of course, but, like,

[Mike Mitchell]

yeah, you don't do well in every segment, but you ha. You are quite good at the Weiger challenge. I'm gonna Strength of yours. I. I forget what your record is. It's documented in the Doughboys Wiki, but you definite winning record.

[Nick Wiger]

I have a winning record in the. In the wier challenge.

[Mike Mitchell]

So Mitch is a. Mitch is a potent foe. That's awesome.

[Brandy Posey]

I went to a. When the grillers first came out of Taco Bell.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I, lady to lady, got invited to a. An influencer party for them, and it was like they had taken over a house in Silver Lake and, like, had a silent disco in one room, and then you could just take pictures with the grillers, and that was fun.

[Mike Mitchell]

That is fun.

[Brandy Posey]

I was. I was like, I've never been invited to anything like that before or since, but for one day, I was like, okay. I'm like a Taco Bell influencer. This is cool.

[Mike Mitchell]

That sounds better than the KFC influencer event we were invited to.

[Nick Wiger]

I also, like, when, like, you know, like, people were like, I saw the Temptations live in our generation's. Like, I went and met the grillers.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I mean, I want to go to that Taco Bell announcement that they do every year. That's like, whenever, like, Apple drops a new products, it looks so cool.

[Mike Mitchell]

How the.

[Nick Wiger]

Have we not.

[Mike Mitchell]

We've done 10 years also. How do they not Invite us to that keto. Because I watch that on my. My own. And then also, like, how is. Like, I've seen who hosts these things. How is, like, Gabrius not hosting this? How's it not like Gabrius and Betsy? It's just like, they crush it.

[Nick Wiger]

And also just invite us.

[Mike Mitchell]

Invite the Doughboys. I see who's there. And I will also invite Brandy fight lady to lady.

[Nick Wiger]

Why are we. How are the. How are we? Are we that bad at our.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah. Are we that bad? If we're that bad, just tell us. I don't think we're that bad.

[Nick Wiger]

I. I don't know. I'm. I'm.

[Mike Mitchell]

Maybe we are. You're making us doubt ourselves. Taco Bell. We've done nothing but. But stick up for you for 10 years. Can't get invited to a keynote.

[Brandy Posey]

I think they're messing up. I think it will only improve next year if you got to try the Baja Blast cheesecake live.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, my God.

[Brandy Posey]

First time.

[Mike Mitchell]

Can you imagine?

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, my gosh.

[Nick Wiger]

I would be so fun. I mean, Hollywood. Not only is Hollywood not care about us, but food. Hollywood doesn't even care about us. We can't get into food. Hollywood.

[Mike Mitchell]

CFO of Doughboy or the CFO of Taco Bell. Can't introduce the Doughboy boys.

[Nick Wiger]

I've said it's my favorite restaurant.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Sucks. My life sucks.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Well, that was your 20th win at the. At the Weiger Challenge.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow. Mitch, congratulations.

[Nick Wiger]

That was my 20th total.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah, that's what it says.

[Nick Wiger]

How many have there been?

[Emma Erdbrink]

I guess I have to do the math.

[Nick Wiger]

20 seems low to me.

[Mike Mitchell]

20 wins, though.

[Nick Wiger]

20 wins. But we've been 10 years.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I know, but we don't do it ever. We don't do it even. Every.

[Nick Wiger]

We've done the Wagger challenge.

[Mike Mitchell]

Every.

[Amelia Marino]

That's an original segment.

[Mike Mitchell]

It is. That is an original segment. It's a year one segment.

[Nick Wiger]

It's a year one segment.

[Mike Mitchell]

We go stretches where we don't do the wier Challenge. It's a periodic feature of the podcast.

[Amelia Marino]

We didn't do it for any of

[Mike Mitchell]

COVID That's part of it. None of co. That's a great point.

[Nick Wiger]

Good point.

[Mike Mitchell]

There's no way to do it.

[Emma Erdbrink]

46.

[Mike Mitchell]

46.

[Nick Wiger]

So I have a losing record.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, Mitch has a losing record.

[Emma Erdbrink]

No.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah. 20 out of 46 means he's lost 26.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I thought he had one.

[Nick Wiger]

I've only won.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Looking at the score right here, it says Vic Michaelis 19 to 8. So that there was a running track of this the whole time.

[Mike Mitchell]

19 and 8 means there have been 27 total up to this point. And this is the 28th and Mitch has won 20 times and lost 8 times.

[Emma Erdbrink]

So why did I count 46?

[Mike Mitchell]

Where did you? I don't know.

[Nick Wiger]

You tell me where 46 is. Too many wagger challenges.

[Emma Erdbrink]

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wait, where are you counting?

[Amelia Marino]

She's counting. They're all listed times.

[Emma Erdbrink]

That why a challenge appeared and then it says 19 8.

[Mike Mitchell]

So there's 46 inches.

[Nick Wiger]

No, we need your help. We need to help.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Try to figure this out. And as we're doing this just like a restorative value feedback. Let's open to the feedback.

[Nick Wiger]

It turns out I suck at the Wyer challenge. I'm not good at anything.

[Mike Mitchell]

No, because it says your running record is 20 and 8. So that there must. Maybe we weren't tracking the record for all these. Maybe some of them were one offs. Maybe the live shows don't count. That might be part of it. The live shows maybe don't count because we do it at the live shows.

[Brandy Posey]

You're better at a live show with an audience or like in studio.

[Nick Wiger]

Oh, I feed off that shit.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

My taste buds fucking. To go to the next level.

[Mike Mitchell]

We'll try to get the bottom of this. Today's emails for Monica in the feedback. Dear Doughboys, long, long time listener, first time feedbacker. After listening the intro for the California Fish Grill episode and hearing Nick talk about aquaculture, I wanted to give my input. As someone who works in the business, I am the research manager at a regional aquaculture association and Ketchika, Alaska, where we produce salmon via sustainable aquaculture, not the fish farming you're thinking of. What we do is grow salmon from eggs up to smolt, basically teenage fish and release them into the ocean where they then put on 99% of their body mass before returning to be caught by everyone who fishes in the area. If you guys ever find yourselves in southeast Alaska, hit me up and I'll give you a tour of the salmon hatcheries here. I haven't lived in Ketchikan.

[Nick Wiger]

I want to do the Doughboys non contiguous tour where we went to Alaska and holding Hawaii.

[Mike Mitchell]

Just moved here in 2024 for my husband's job. Ketchikan is a weird place in many ways. It's on an island. People call it a drinking town with a fishing problem. And we have very limited options re chain restaurants. There are only two of them here. McDonald's and taco time. Not the Seattle based Version, sadly, fun fact. Our Taco time also serves Filipino food. My question for the doughboys is, if you lived on an island and had to choose one or two chain restaurants. Restaurants, what would you pick? Love the pod. All the best. Monica. Monica, thank you so much for that context on aquaculture.

[Nick Wiger]

That's. That is. That is very fascinating. Fascinating.

[Mike Mitchell]

I like that.

[Brandy Posey]

I like that there.

[Mike Mitchell]

There are people working on the sustainable side. This is the thing. We got it. We got into our. One of our fish episodes. But, like, you know, there's basically factory farming. You mean this may be stuff you already know, but there's basically factory farming. I'll recap this for our audience as well. It. That. That is. That is the equivalent of like, these. These mass feedlots, lots, but it's for fish. And a lot of them are really detrimental to the ocean.

[Brandy Posey]

That makes a lot of sense.

[Mike Mitchell]

But. But let's.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Let's do.

[Mike Mitchell]

Let's indulge in this exercise. You have a. You. You're living on an island and could be in Alaska. Could be wherever.

[Nick Wiger]

Could be Little St. James.

[Mike Mitchell]

Could be a Little St. James. You're on Little St. James. They. They basically said that, hey, we're giving this to you. It's. It's part of the settlement. Is that, you know, whatever you're. You end up getting gifted to this for gifted. This for whatever reason. You can do what you. Yeah, hush, hush.

[Nick Wiger]

Do you name it Little St. James?

[Mike Mitchell]

I think it was already named that. Yeah, I don't think he named it.

[Nick Wiger]

Creepy name. It's a creepy name. Saint James.

[Mike Mitchell]

It's fucking creepy.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

Every part of it is creepy.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah. Except for James, I guess. It's okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'll say this. I don't care for what he was getting up to on there.

[Nick Wiger]

Yeah, same here. Wise.

[Mike Mitchell]

Some bad stuff as far as I'm concerned.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't like the history of that island at all. The whole history of. It's no good.

[Mike Mitchell]

I just got sent the Epstein screener. Let me check this out.

[Nick Wiger]

It's just up until Epstein moves in. Okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

All right.

[Brandy Posey]

Guy was good at math.

[Mike Mitchell]

What an investor.

[Nick Wiger]

I separate the investor from the investing. Is that what it is? Oh, investing from the investor. Whatever. I've already said this before.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'm gonna pick two pretty quickly.

[Nick Wiger]

I. I mean, I know one right off the top of my head. I think. I think it's the same thing. One of them is McDonald's. Come on.

[Mike Mitchell]

You're saying one of them is McDonald's?

[Nick Wiger]

Like, oh, you don't agree?

[Emma Erdbrink]

Great.

[Amelia Marino]

I know Wires, too.

[Mike Mitchell]

You know mine. I think you know mine.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah, I was gonna say in and out.

[Mike Mitchell]

In and out. Emma's correct. In N Out Burger is going to be one of them.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, wow.

[Mike Mitchell]

I thought about Del Taco, but they said chain restaurants. And how about a place where I can sit down, enjoy myself. And also a place with a sprawling menu. One of my favorite chain restaurants, Cheesecake Factory.

[Brandy Posey]

I was thinking. I'm thinking Cheesecake.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

You got everything available.

[Mike Mitchell]

You got everything there.

[Nick Wiger]

There on like. Like in a small Alaskan town or an Alaskan. Well, there is an Alaskan island. I don't. Who cares? It is an Alaskan island and a small Alaskan island. A Cheesecake Factory or like a Chili's would be like that. That would be the place.

[Mike Mitchell]

Get a bar you can hang out at.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Oh, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

Be the place to be.

[Mike Mitchell]

Okay, I'll read this from the email again. Ketchikan is a weird place in many ways. It's on an island, so they. They are.

[Amelia Marino]

When you said a sit down, I thought you were going to say a Hillstone.

[Mike Mitchell]

I mean, a Hillstone would be great. The thing about the Cheesecake Factory has over Hillstone is. Yeah, Hillstone's more expensive.

[Nick Wiger]

Also seems like you're cheating a little bit.

[Mike Mitchell]

It seems like you're cheating Cheesecake Factory. Also, like, that could be a gathering place for the town. People are going to hang out there, hang at the bar. Everything that they have. Everything. I want Mexican food. I can get Cheesecake Factory's version. I want Asian food. I can get their version. You know, it's all of it. It's all there, Randy. I mean, Cheesecake Factory is. Is fine to be your answer as well, but what do you think?

[Brandy Posey]

Well, when I think about this question, because usually we try to be like, what are the two kinds of foods that you could eat forever? It's like, when I go there, Cheesecake, I think is definitely the answer because then you can have anything. But Mexican and Japanese are the two things that I'm always like, I could eat one of those things every day and I think, be happy for the rest of my life. So I would have. I think I would pick Chevy's. You ever been to a Chevy's?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah, I know Chevy's.

[Amelia Marino]

Okay.

[Mike Mitchell]

We've never reviewed it.

[Brandy Posey]

Oh, I love Chevy's. They don't have it in Burbank anymore. It's really sad.

[Mike Mitchell]

They got rid of some of the South Lawn locations. They had a Manhattan beach one as well.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I love Chevy's. Growing. Growing up. Chevy's cuz I made their chips in house. So there's salsa the table. It's delicious. First time I ever had avocado in a tortilla soup blew my mind as a kid. That did not grow up around a lot of Mexican food. I go with that. I think I would go with a. What's the. There's like a sushi chain out here.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, Sushi Stop. Is that what you're thinking?

[Brandy Posey]

Sushi Stop? Yeah, I think I'd have a sushi stop. I'd be really happy with those two things forever.

[Mike Mitchell]

We reviewed Sushi Stop on the podcast Alaska Islands. Sushi Stop is very solid as far as a sushi chain and there aren't a lot of sushi chains, so. Yeah, I think that's a good choice. Yeah, I mean, like, that's. That's what I'm realizing. I'm not going to get any. There might be like a few rolls on the Cheesecake Factory menu, but Japanese food's going to be hard to come by and that'll be definitely an absence in my life. But know, whatever, we're going to be limited. And. And what in out factory. What in out gets for me? Cheese. Not factory. Cheesecake Factory. In and out burger. What an out burger gets for me is it gets me those. Those bites of childhood. Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[Nick Wiger]

Bites of childhood. I.

[Amelia Marino]

All right.

[Nick Wiger]

I think McDonald's.

[Mike Mitchell]

We are in Little St. James.

[Nick Wiger]

McDonald's. It has to be one of my choices. Yeah. Just because It's. You're talking 24 hours. McDonald's is always open.

[Mike Mitchell]

Like, McDonald's is great. I. There. There is no there. Look, everyone has made good choices so far.

[Nick Wiger]

The. My other choice is that's. This is tougher because I'm like, if it was two fast food restaurants, it would be McDonald's and probably now Taco Bell. Yeah, those would be the two that I would have there. I would really miss in the past. I'd be like, ooh, Wendy's is tough. Do I do Wendy's? But no longer. Wendy's is gone.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah. 1998 Wendy's in current Taco Bell.

[Nick Wiger]

Now, let me tell you, if it was time travel, if this was 1994 Wendy's and they were in. In the. The. The yellow cups and the yellow fries salad bar, that would. That would. And you know what? That's a place to go down and

[Mike Mitchell]

sit and eat Yokiero. Taco Bell era Taco Bell. I mean, hey, that's no slouch.

[Nick Wiger]

That's no slouch. Either. I mean I'm saying, I'm saying it probably honestly would replace McDonald's, Wendy's at the that time.

[Mike Mitchell]

Sure.

[Nick Wiger]

But Instead I'm going McDonald's and then taco Bell for fast food. But I think that I would have to make it McDonald's and some sort of like chain sit down place because we're on an island here. And I think since you already took Cheesecake Factory, I think that's the right choice. But I'm going to go Chili's instead.

[Mike Mitchell]

Chili's is a great pick. Lot of fun and hey, that's, that's certainly cheaper than, than Cheesecake Factory and more of a neighborhood hang. So. Even good in the neighborhood.

[Brandy Posey]

Definitely. Have you guys played Alaska?

[Nick Wiger]

No, we haven't.

[Mike Mitchell]

Have you been there?

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, I did a festival there a few years ago.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Awesome.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Nick Wiger]

Would love to do. I would love to do the non contiguous store.

[Mike Mitchell]

We've been to Saskatoon. That was the, the most remote, cold place. We've been to Saskatoon in Saskatchewan.

[Brandy Posey]

That's cool.

[Mike Mitchell]

But we've. Yeah, we've never been to Alaska.

[Nick Wiger]

I don't know.

[Mike Mitchell]

Well, maybe we'll go to Alaska. I don't know what we review.

[Brandy Posey]

It was really cool. It was really cool. There was a. I met a guy at my show who had just bought 30 acres and it had a burnt out school bus on it. And he told me that he had to turn that into a house by winter or he'd probably freeze to death. And I was like, there's easier ways to live. But I'm glad, like you seem really happy about your choices. Dude, that's wild. Yeah, they're built different up there. It's great.

[Mike Mitchell]

If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email [e-mail] or leave us a voice30 go do. That's 830-463-6844.

[Nick Wiger]

If you and I stayed in a fucking igloo up there, it would be fun. Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

I wonder.

[Brandy Posey]

The Aurora is really cool.

[Mike Mitchell]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

I did a tour to go see the Aurora borealis and it was awesome.

[Nick Wiger]

That would be fun, me bringing my CPAP into an igloo.

[Emma Erdbrink]

By the way, we got down to the bottom of it. There was a tie column.

[Amelia Marino]

It was a formatting issue.

[Emma Erdbrink]

19 wins. Well now 20 wins for Mitch. 18 ties.

[Nick Wiger]

18 ties and only eight losses. Wow.

[Brandy Posey]

Okay, okay.

[Nick Wiger]

A lot of those ties are me being like, hey, it's a tie. I mean today could have been a tie too, I feel like. Because that was Very. You were very on board with it being.

[Brandy Posey]

Yeah, yeah.

[Nick Wiger]

And I 100% agreed.

[Mike Mitchell]

I think those. All right, so we'll make this one a tie. This admission is still 1998.

[Nick Wiger]

Fine.

[Mike Mitchell]

Our producer is Emma Erdbrink. Our associate producers, Amelia Marino. Our video editor is Mike Dorfman. Doughboys [e-mail] doughboys and hey, to get the Doughboys, double our weekly bonus episodes, [e-mail] doughboys that's also where you can listen to all our recent tour episodes. Those are all behind the paywall.

[Nick Wiger]

Patreon.com doughboys you know, I told you I saw Hokum last night. Yeah. And I, I saw. I. There was this guy who said, hey, Mitch. And he said, I listened to the podcast and his name was Jack Seaver McDonald. He said, Tell wise. I said, what's up? And he's like, I'm the bully on ted. He's the bully to the.

[Emma Erdbrink]

The.

[Nick Wiger]

To the sun on ted.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wow.

[Nick Wiger]

He listens to the. He listens to the pot. A very nice guy. And we both like to. There you go, the Ted bully. Thank you, Jack.

[Mike Mitchell]

Nice to see you. Thanks for listening. Brandy Posey. Milk Job is the special. Please, a plug away.

[Amelia Marino]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

You can find milk job on YouTube.com/burn this records. Brandazzle is me on Instagram. Brendazzle is here on TikTok. Lady Delay is my lady. Delady is my podcast. We've been around for 14 years. I have a show in LA called Picture this that's comedians paired up with animators and they draw your jokes during your set. And it is extremely fun. We tour that all around the country and stuff too. And then Burn this Records is my record label that I started a few years ago to try to like, make a place that comedy standup comedy feels good again. Come check it out. I'm on warped tour all summer long. If you don't like my face, but you like my voice. Milk Job is also an album. Wherever you listen to music, you can also do that. But yeah, come find me.

[Mike Mitchell]

Come say hi, Randy. We met. We were reminiscing in the kitchen. We met many years ago in a. In a sketch comedy 101 class at UCB that we were both taking. It was like that, that early in both of our LA lives and it's really awesome what you build. And I've guessed on lady to Lady a number of times. A really fun podcast. People should check it out if they're not already subscribing. And congratulations on the special and on the label. It's so cool.

[Nick Wiger]

Thank you.

[Brandy Posey]

Hey, you know what? We're both still doing it.

[Mike Mitchell]

We're both still doing it.

[Brandy Posey]

Awesome. And like, we don't have too many bodies.

[Mike Mitchell]

No. We don't know where.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Brandy Posey]

Great.

[Mike Mitchell]

And we know Mitch. That's something.

[Brandy Posey]

We got Mitch.

[Nick Wiger]

I personally think one of you two should hang it up. I'm talking about Wagar.

[Mike Mitchell]

Oh, I'll be hanging it up pretty soon.

[Nick Wiger]

That'll do it for add like, studio audience laughter to there to make it seem less fucking.

[Mike Mitchell]

I'll do it for this episode of Doughboys. Until next time, for the Spoon with Mike Mitchell. I'm Nick. Tiger Weger. Happy eating.

[Nick Wiger]

See ya.

[Mike Mitchell]

Hi, I am Mandy Moore.

[Nick Wiger]

Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast that was Us now on Henry.

[Brandy Posey]

Each episode, we're gonna go into a

[Emma Erdbrink]

deep dive from our show.

[Brandy Posey]

This is us.

[Nick Wiger]

That's right.

[Brandy Posey]

We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with

[Emma Erdbrink]

different guest stars and writers and casting directors.

[Nick Wiger]

Are we gonna cry?

[Mike Mitchell]

Yes, A little bit.

[Nick Wiger]

Are we gonna laugh a lot?

[Mike Mitchell]

A whole lot.

[Nick Wiger]

That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to that Was us on your favorite podcast app. Or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. Notify new episodes every Tuesday.

[Mike Mitchell]

Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville.

[Nick Wiger]

And I'm Jeff Tremaine.

[Mike Mitchell]

Welcome to Jackass the Podcast, a new show coming to, coming to.

[Nick Wiger]

That's what it is.

[Mike Mitchell]

Hello, I'm Johnny Knoxville. And I'm Jeff Tremaine. Welcome to Jackass the Podcast, a new show now on Headgum. I've learned a Jackass movie has to be really nice.

[Brandy Posey]

90 minutes.

[Nick Wiger]

Every minute over is a minute too long.

[Mike Mitchell]

Apparently. There's only so much butthole you can take. We're going to take you behind the scenes of our entire history. All the best bits, bad behavior and even worse decisions. All of it. Sometimes we don't make the right decisions. Jeff. I've noticed that every. Every so often with guests like Spike Jones.

[Nick Wiger]

I think let's commit to Jackass the podcast.

[Mike Mitchell]

What was it going to be called? The Jackass Podcast. That Jackass contest.

[Nick Wiger]

Without you, the IQ drops significantly.

[Mike Mitchell]

Steve O. There's a strong chance that were it

[Brandy Posey]

not for Jackass, that I would be in clown makeup right this minute.

[Mike Mitchell]

Chris Ponus.

[Nick Wiger]

That shot of your butt just cruising up, I'm like, yeah, I got that on tv.

[Mike Mitchell]

God bless us, Dave England.

[Emma Erdbrink]

Yeah.

[Mike Mitchell]

When you come in and you're being

[Nick Wiger]

really nice, I'm like, damn it. Something bad's gonna happen to me.

[Mike Mitchell]

Wee Man Jeff grabbed me from the back of the head and threw a punch.

[Nick Wiger]

The whole bar just stopped and wanted

[Mike Mitchell]

to kill me and some of the crew that's been with us from the beginning. I had to share a room with this guy.

[Nick Wiger]

I left a nice surprise in the

[Mike Mitchell]

toilet for every time. Apparently he hates to flush. Subscribe to Jackass, the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcast, Pocket Cast, or wherever the hell you get podcasts.

[Nick Wiger]

Our new episodes drop on June 18th.

[Mike Mitchell]

Woo.

[Nick Wiger]

Look out for new episodes in your feed every Thursday.

[Mike Mitchell]

Watch video episodes on YouTube and follow along with us on Instagram and TikTok @JackassThePodcast. What were we just talking about? Probably buttholes.

[Nick Wiger]

That was a headgum podcast.