Little Caesars 5 with Kimmy Gatewood

Summary

Doughboys: “Little Caesars 5” with Kimmy Gatewood (July 23, 2026)

Doughboys Media | Headgum

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Episode Overview

Comedians Mike “Spoonman” Mitchell and Nick “Wiger” Weiger return to review Little Caesars for the fifth time, joined by director, comedian, and Muppets enthusiast Kimmy Gatewood. The trio discusses chain pizza, nostalgia, camp stories, directing for Disney, and the new limited-time “Weberoni” pizza—Little Caesars' Spider-Man tie-in. Along the way, listeners are treated to trademark Doughboys riffing, character bits, reflections on food and comedy, and a deep dive into the experience of eating and reviewing Little Caesars in 2026.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Intro, Banter, and Friendship Monetization

• The hosts reflect on their long working/personal relationship, joking about how their friendship is “monetized.”
  • “What is the ratio of us actually being friends and us being paid to hang out?” (07:03, Mitchell)
  • Amelia (producer) playfully observes: “You’re like the Kardashians of eating shitty food.” (07:45)
• Emma and Amelia appear regularly throughout, adding to the rapport and riffing.

2. Comedy, Characters, and Voice Memos

• Recurring Doughboys theme: the importance of character work in comedy, both performed live (Judy Garland afraid of bears, “old guy commenting on Zoomer slang”) and preserved in dozens of voice memos, often forgotten.
  • Sample: “Back in my day, the only thing we would glaze is a honey baked ham.” (12:42, Mitchell, playing “old guy”)
• Kimmy Gatewood and the guys perform characters, lamenting their inability to remember all their bits unless meticulously written or recorded.

3. Kimmy Gatewood: Career, Travel, and Muppets

• Kimmy shares her experience as a traveling vegetarian/pescatarian, especially in Ireland where being meat-free is tricky.
  • “The first thing is get a kitchen … because you just have to eat out all the time. All of a sudden, you’re bloated!” (16:28)
• Discussion of Muppet fandom and working on Muppets Mayhem and Sesame Street:
  • “The best part about puppets and Muppets ... is like getting up close with them. Specifically, like the Muppets—because Animal lived in my grandfather’s car growing up.” (33:03)
  • The technical side of puppetry, from the “deathtrap” sets to the depth of collaboration required (43:30).

4. Nostalgia, Sketch Comedy, and UCB Roots

• The lifelong bonds from the UCB comedy scene:
  • Both Kimmy’s Apple Sisters and Mitchell’s Birthday Boys are celebrating 20-year anniversaries.
  • “It took up most of our lives, and some people have regrets about that. Not pointing at you specifically, but…” (26:34, Mitchell)
• Reflection on moving beyond sketch comedy: “I don’t miss it. That part of my life is over.” (Weiger, 27:00)

5. Pizza Preferences and The Lure of LA Pizza

• Kimmy, a New Yorker, controversially praises LA pizza, listing favorites: Triple Beam (especially squash pie), Quarter Sheets, and Desano’s (64:01–69:09).
  • “I do, controversially, like from New York, love LA pizza so much … I recreated their acorn squash pizza during COVID.” (64:01)
• Consensus: a good cheese pizza is the “platonic ideal” (65:54, Weiger).
• Riffs on pizza habits—pizza at writers’ rooms, big novelty pies at comedy shows, and the importance of party “vibes.”

6. Summer Camp, Growing Up, and Cookie Hierarchies

• Summer camp memories, including theater and scout camps, lead to reflections on camp counselor tribulations and youthful awkwardness.
  • Memorable: “Stop showing each other your pubes!” (52:32, Mitchell recalling camp antics)
• Girl Scout cookies: Thin Mints, Samoas, Tagalongs debated; East vs West Coast naming conventions explored.
  • “Samoas are called Caramel Delights on the East Coast.” (55:00)

7. Slang, Generational Gaps, and Character Bit Comebacks

• The old guy bit returns periodically, jabbing at Zoomer slang (“glaze,” “drip,” “let them cook,” “riz,” “skibidy,” “scuba”) in classic Doughboys meta-fashion.
  • “Back in my day, 67 was the number of hours I baked a honey baked ham in the oven.” (75:16, Mitchell)
  • Is “scuba” the new “skibidy”? Ask an 11-year-old. (75:03)

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Little Caesars Review

Overview of Limited Time Offers (LTOs)

• Weberoni Pizza: Spider-Man tie-in—shredded “web” pepperoni on a mozzarella pizza in a Spider-Man box ($8.99).
  • Looks impressive in ads, but, per Wiger: “In practice, it just looks like a bunch of little pepperoni strips randomly arrayed.” (80:06)
  • Mitchell: “A kid excited for Spider-Man would think it’s cool. It’s fine. It’s got effort.” (82:15)
• Veggie Detroit-Style Deep Dish: Green peppers, onions, mushrooms, and olives.
  • Mushrooms rated “too slimy”; peppers and olives fare better (83:19).
  • Love for the Detroit-style crust is near-universal: “The deep dish … is good. The vegetables did a disservice to it.” (87:01)
• Cheese-Stuffed Pretzel Crust (with cheese sauce): Not what the hosts expected, but “gross, but kind of good” and “perfect hangout pizza—stadium food, vibe pizza.” (92:12)
• Cookie Dough Brownie with Twix: Unidentifiable, “very science, very chemically,” but “still pretty tasty.” “It felt bleachy ... not that it was bleach.” (94:41, Gatewood)

Little Caesars as a Brand

• Praised for being the “working man’s pizza”—cheap, ready, and reliable.
• Brand legacy: Founder Mike Ilitch paid Rosa Parks’s rent for years—a “benevolent act,” but hosts try to balance myth vs. reality re: corporate ethics (88:15).

Drinks

• Exclusive Mountain Dew Mango Rush: Mango “sweet heat,” but heat is missing. “Way too sweet, tastes syrupy, but a good mixer.” (99:08, Weiger/Mitchell)

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Fork Scores & Final Verdict

1. Kimmy Gatewood: 3.5 forks

“Surprised by the deep dish … points for creativity on the Spider web, minus for execution. The pretzel pizza would be my new favorite stadium food if they served it at an Angel City game.” (107:40)

2. Mike Mitchell: 5 forks

“I want to give Little Caesars five forks because I just like it … I believe in what they’re doing … the deep dish is a good pizza, and we got like the worst version today.” (110:29)

3. Nick Weiger: 4 forks

“The Weberoni pizza’s $8.99 ... That has to be a thing we consider. For the price point, the quality is very much in the pro column.” (113:21)

Consensus: Little Caesars remains a strong value, totally serviceable for the price (between 3.5 and 5 forks, just shy of the hallowed “Golden Plate Club”).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Comedy Podcasting:

  • “You’re monetizing your friendship.” —Amelia, 07:43
  • “We’re the Kardashians of eating shitty food.” —Amelia, 07:45

• On Fast Food Tie-ins:

  • “So will audiences and eaters see through this web of deceit and finally decide, ‘My bullshit sense is tingling?’ This week on Doughboys: Whoa! We ate that guy’s pizzas! As we return to Little Caesars for your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man’s Weberoni pizza.” —Weiger, 04:57

• On Nostalgia and Muppets:

  • “I truly believe that whatever Muppet you identify with is the Muppet you are.” —Gatewood, 42:12

• On Pricing & Value:

  • “Three pizzas, a dessert, and drinks. $43.83. In this day and age?” —Weiger, 111:31

• On Camp Life:

  • “Stop showing each other your pubes! This is the truth!” —Mitchell, reminiscing about camp, 52:32

• On Pizza Chains:

  • “Little Caesars is the working man’s pizza—it’s got a lot going for it.” —Mitchell, 110:29

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Important Timestamps

• 00:48–03:00: Banter, movie night, Doughboys live at Los Feliz 3
• 09:11–14:48: Comedy, characters, voice memo roulette
• 15:16: Introduction of guest Kimmy Gatewood
• 16:22–21:00: Food abroad, surviving as a vegetarian
• 31:21–34:22: Muppet Show & Sesame Street behind-the-scenes
• 45:23–52:32: Summer camp/childhood stories, Girl Scouts
• 64:01–69:09: LA pizza favorites and the Platonic ideal of cheese pizza
• 77:49–79:00: The “old guy” bit returns
• 78:11–87:34: Little Caesars’ history and current offerings
• 91:42–94:47: The controversial cheese-stuffed pretzel crust and Twix dessert
• 104:57–107:35: Fork scores
• 114:00–120:43: “Family Food” ice cream flavors game
• 123:26–128:22: Listener mail, discussion of restaurant smells
• 133:14–135:42: Kimmy plugs Descendants: Wicked Wonderland, director’s perspective, big Disney sets

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Overall Tone

The episode is classic Doughboys: loose, highly conversational, playful, and digressive, with moments of absurdism, warmth, and self-deprecation. Lively camaraderie abounds; all speakers riff, reminisce, and gently roast each other, making even the food review segments more about shared experiences than culinary authority.

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Conclusion

This packed episode is more than just a Little Caesars review: it’s a celebration of cheap pizza, comedy grinding, the glory of Muppets, childhood rites of passage, and the enduring power of friendships that are sometimes (very profitably) “monetized.” The Spider-Man “Weberoni” pizza isn’t life-changing, but as always, hanging out with friends—especially for an $8.99 pie—is “vibe pizza” at its core.

Recommended if you want:

• Chain pizza nostalgia
• LA and NYC food talk
• Comedy/performer origin stories
• Muppet inside baseball
• Summer camp war stories
• The wild world of pizza marketing
• A heartfelt, funny, and mildly chaotic journey through friends, food, and fandom

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Transcript

[A]

This is a Headgun podcast. Want to watch this episode? Check it out on our YouTube channel by going to YouTube.com doughboysmedia Mitch, we love the movies. We love the movies.

[B]

And we are very, very excited to have a collab with American Cinema Tech.

[A]

That's right, Wygs. American Cinema Tech. Right here on my hat, we have

[B]

a Doughboys fast food film series in collaboration with American Cinema Tech. Fridays in July and August at the Los Feliz 3 here in Los Angeles. Great theater, great organization.

[A]

That's right, Wygs. The Los Feliz 3 is one of my favorite little spots in town. I love seeing movies over there, and I've seen some American cinematech movies over there, and it's. It's a great place to watch a movie. And now the Doughboys are gonna be there, too.

[B]

That's right. Mitch and I will be live in person to introduce these films, these four fine films that may have something in common.

[A]

Yeah, let's see if you notice a theme here. Friday, July 31st, Raising Cain, 1992 by Brian DePalma.

[B]

Friday, August 7th, we'll be talking about Robert Altman's 1980 film Popeye, starring Robin Williams.

[A]

Friday, August 14th, we're doing in and Out with Frank Oz from 1997.

[B]

Yeah, the great Frank Oz.

[A]

The great Frank.

[B]

Hey, as a Muppet man.

[A]

Hey, did you watch? Did you listen to Monk?

[B]

Did you listen to it?

[A]

You didn't like Monk.

[B]

You don't like Monk.

[A]

All right, what can we do?

[B]

Well, you know what you'll still like? In n Out, because that's a great. Whether you're a Muppet lover or hater. Kevin Kline, great performance. Joan Cusack, Oscar nominated. And Also on Friday, August 21st, we'll be going back to 1931 with Mervyn Leroy's Little Caesar. Did you figure out the pattern?

[A]

Popcorn, Popcorn. That's me at the theater.

[B]

Popcorn, Popcorn, indeed. Check us out. Fridays in July and August, Raising Cane, Popeye, In n Out, and Little Caesar. How fun is that? [e-mail] live.

[A]

And here's something El I've. I haven't seen a single one of these movies. So if you haven't seen any of them coming, now's your chance to see them on the big screen.

[B]

You're in for a treat. These movies are really fun. And hey, if you've. If you've seen one of these before, great to see it in the theater. I've never seen any of these in theaters before.

[A]

Tickets@doughboys podcast.com live and hey, we'll see at the movies like Cisco, Niebuhr Lights,

[B]

Camera, Snackion Popcorn Popcorn.

[A]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Whoa, he stole that guy's pizzas. This line uttered by actor Donnell Rowlings, perhaps best known for his recurring roles on Chappelle's show, including his beloved character Ashy Larry, is a much quoted early moment from Sam Raimi's 2004 film Spider Man 2. In the 22 years since, eight more theatrical Spider man films have been released, seemingly concluding the live action franchise with 2021's no Way Home, a multiverse merging of the Tobey Maguire, Andrew Garfield and Tom Holland iterations of the arachnid superhero. But no, of course, they're not done yet. With the Marvel Cinematic Universe on fumes and the over saturation of franchise filmmaking seemingly fatiguing audiences into apathy, Marvel and Sony nevertheless are once again exhuming the web slinger with a movie that's about him fighting ninjas or some shit. Marvel's treatment of the Spider man character parallels the way Stan Lee, Spider Man's co creator with Steve Ditko, was treated late in his life, a victim of alleged elder abuse by his daughter JC and multiple business associates, according to published reports. Following the death of his protective wife Joanie, these opportunistic co conspirators pilfered his fortune, wrangled a barely cognizant Lee into wildly profitable fan meet and greets, and fired Lee's lawyer and nurse to create further insulation for their mafia bust out of his legacy. Upon Lee's merciful death in 2018, his longtime driver and friend Jonathan Bolarjack remarked, quote, I guess I read too many comic books where the heroes win and the bad guys go down. But that didn't happen. And that's what was upsetting Lee's daughter JC who has plausibly been accused of masterminding her father's late in life abuse, now controls his estate and IP rights. And perhaps that's part of why Lee's creations have been strip mined by multinational corporations. If it's profitable enough, elder abuse can continue from beyond the grave. But the new Spider man film does at least present an opportunity for another now obligatory branded fast food tie in. Like the upcoming MCU Spider man itself, the promotion feels phoned in and re appropriating an already tired formula. So will audiences and eaters see through this web of deceit and finally decide? My bullshit senses tingling this week on Doughboys. Whoa. We ate that guy's pizzas. As we return to Little Caesars for your friendly neighborhood Spider man, brand new day's Weberoni pizz.

[A]

Donut.

[B]

Welcome to Doughboys, the podcast about chain restaurants. I'm Nick Tiger Weiger along with my co host, Fleetwood Big Mac.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

The spoon man, Mike Mitchell, my mom.

[A]

Huge Fleetwood Mac fan.

[B]

I was going to ask you what your connection to Fleetwood Mac was.

[A]

I mean, there's not a. My mom loves Fleetwood Matt I like. I mean, who doesn't like Fleetwood Mac? Who say, mum. Yeah, this is an issue.

[C]

This.

[A]

This is the thing that I.

[B]

This is the Quincy comes out.

[A]

This is. This is like a weird Boston. This is. Except not everyone in Boston speaks away, but some people do. I don't know if it's left over from those damn Brits that took over the state.

[B]

Who knows?

[A]

Or the country. I should say. We. They were. They were. They. They. They were in charge over here. Wigs. At one point.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, a portion of it.

[A]

The colonies, we just celebrated the independence from them.

[B]

Oh, man. We're just. Oh, what a celebration it was. What did you do for the 2 50th, Mitch? I was having a ball.

[A]

I saw Amelia.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

We went to a pool party.

[C]

It was fun.

[B]

Hey, that's fun. Okay. There you go.

[A]

Had a few beverages. We hung out. I was just saying before this started that I was wondering if I have ever hung out with you not being paid if I only hang out with you when I'm getting paid.

[B]

But in all fairness, I said before that. I said I hang out with Mitch, but it's my job.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

So I feel like you kind of were just doing a second video.

[A]

I was doing a. I was doing a. But I was saying I'm wondering. And. But in my mind, this is. What I was going to say is that.

[B]

And then Emma was like, me too. And that was somehow the cruelest.

[A]

That was good. That was good. That was really good. I was gonna say I've hung out with you more. I've been paid to hang out with you more than I've hung out with you. Yeah, like probably 100 to 1 or something.

[B]

I'm saying, like, what is the ratio of us actually being friends and us being paid to hang out?

[A]

I've. If you Consider the podcasting. Paid to hang out, then. I've spent way more time with you being paid to hang out.

[B]

I don't know if that's true that you're. Are you counting stuff, like, when we're talking about podcast stuff, not doing the podcast as well? Because I don't. I don't consider that necessarily the same thing.

[A]

When. When is this over text? That's not hanging out with you.

[B]

Yeah, so that's what I'm saying. Like, if we're just gonna hang out, which we do, then like. Like, I don't know what's going to see a Mission Impossible movie is. Well, I guess we have done episodes about.

[A]

That's also two hours.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[C]

How about this? You're monetizing your friendship.

[B]

There you go. That's healthy, right?

[C]

Yeah, totally. You're like the Kardashians of eating shitty food.

[A]

We're back. We're back. We're back in the content minds.

[B]

Wags back in the content minds.

[A]

I found a hit tweet in that river.

[B]

Did you discuss it ahead of time? What is going on? You cued Amelia to do this.

[A]

I had a thing.

[B]

You spoke over it.

[C]

Keep going, keep going.

[A]

First of all, we. We didn't have a thing.

[B]

She just.

[A]

She's done this. But we've.

[B]

Sorry. Keep going. You found. You found a tweet in the.

[A]

Yeah, I found a tweet in the river. It's verified.

[B]

I'm glad we came back to that. I mean, deja vu. Thanks for the laughs. Shout out to Emma and Amelia. Annie, you like?

[A]

It's very like.

[B]

It's bird dot com.

[A]

I thought it was good.

[B]

It was good. I thought it was good.

[A]

You didn't act like it was good.

[B]

I enjoyed it. I had a lot of fun. I'm having fun and I'm on the clock now. I'm not gonna get back to work.

[A]

I had a new guy. I'm not gonna do him anymore.

[B]

Wait, I don't wanna see the new guy. No, Mitch, do the new guy.

[C]

I'm here.

[B]

You're the new guy for our guest.

[C]

We're all friends.

[A]

No, he. He was. His reaction was too mean.

[B]

I wasn't being. I wasn't mean to be mean.

[C]

It's just you and me. You're off the clock. We're gonna take a time out. Okay.

[A]

Let me. Let me see. I'm gonna. I gotta find. I gotta find out.

[C]

Let's go have a smoke break. But a character break.

[A]

You and me. Let's see here. I Gotta find it.

[B]

Mitch is fine. Mitch is finding it. I'll just say that we had a lot of heavy food. I'm dealing with the case of the rumblies. I also earlier, like, when I got to the studio, because I got to the studio pretty early, I just decided to go across the street to the Mexican. The little Mexican stand there and get a chilerino burrito. It was so fucking stupid. Why am I so dumb? Why have such poor judgment?

[A]

That was bad.

[B]

I know. I wanted one. And then I get a burrito. I ate a chilerino burrito on an empty stomach, like two hours before I had to eat, like, a bunch of pizza.

[C]

Yeah. Wax and I have been hanging out

[B]

for like three hours now. Yeah. So you're making bank?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

What happened? You lost the notes app?

[A]

I lost it in my notes app.

[C]

It's classic. It's just.

[B]

I know. Wait, so you know the guy? You still know who the guy is? Or you do a reminder of what the guy is from your notes app?

[C]

Let's go see things.

[A]

I'm going to try to find. I'm going to try to find it and.

[C]

Mum. Boston Tea Party.

[A]

I mean, that's.

[B]

That's pretty good.

[C]

Is that what.

[A]

That's. I know that. I know that the. I know. I know what the guy is. But the things that I was gonna say, I didn't write down. So I'm like, kind of spiraling, right?

[B]

Oh, so you had, like. You had a few. You had a few pre. Preloaded jokes.

[C]

Yeah, I remember one of them.

[A]

No, that's.

[B]

No, that's.

[A]

That's not.

[B]

That one is. That one was good, though.

[C]

That's not right.

[A]

That's gonna bomb right now. I can't pull that one out. I can't. I can't pull that out. The show is good, by the way. The show is good now.

[B]

The show's good now.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

The show is good.

[B]

The show is good now.

[A]

The show is. We're starting today. It's a new era of doughboys. It's going to be good again. Because you always say the show is bad and you say we're not funny.

[B]

You say it's funny. I want to be funny. Yeah, we can do that. I want to be funny. Not just me. The last episode we recorded, you talked about us bombing and doing bad, so that's on.

[A]

Well, that happens sometimes, but I know you speak only positive affirmations. Speak for yourself.

[B]

We're doing great. I'm happy. We live a charmed life.

[C]

They just got a raise. I Think. Did you ever see. Did you ever. So my. I'll do a character for you. I used to do this character on stage, Judy Garland, who was afraid of bears. Would you like to hear?

[A]

I would love that.

[C]

That's great. Hello, it's me, Judy. Judy Garland. You're a bear. You're a bear. Sure. You're a bear with your cousin. You can't hide from me, bear. I know you're a bear. Don't try to trick me. That's a bear and you're a bear. So stupid.

[B]

I can't follow that up. Pretty good.

[A]

I can't follow that up. I'm done for. I can't follow that.

[C]

Keep scrolling through your notes. Up. I paid good money to be here

[B]

and I want a character.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Would it help you out if I did a bad character I have not even thought about first? Just like clear the palette?

[A]

Sure. Yes.

[B]

Okay, so how about like,

[A]

Hello, I'm Professor. Mr. Stupid. Professor Penn. I thought you were gonna say Professor Penn.

[B]

Also, Professor Stupid's not talking to the microphone.

[A]

He's not talking to the mic.

[B]

See, there you go. That's in character.

[C]

Professor. Mr. Stupid does not know how to use a mic. You're gonna do great.

[B]

Wait, what's his name? Professor Penn or Mr. Stupid? I went on Professor Mr. Stupid. But Professor Penn is good. Maybe Professor Penn is a punch.

[A]

Professor Penn is good.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, my guy. I can't find the examples and so it's going to drive me nuts. And I can only remember one.

[B]

We'll just do that.

[C]

I want to see it.

[A]

The character is old guy commenting on zoom or slang. Okay. Back in my day, the only thing we would glaze is a honey baked ham.

[B]

That's good.

[A]

And here's the. Here's the other part of it. Back in my day, drip was the glaze that would come off a honey baked hair.

[B]

This character sounds like he's a little bit like friends with this guy.

[A]

He is. He is close to. He is close to the.

[B]

They like, hang out and say weird

[C]

stuff to each other.

[A]

There was a really good one that I. That I can't remember and I'm sad. There was one example.

[B]

Maybe we'll come to you. Throughout the show. You can always go back into.

[A]

Yeah, I'm going to. I'll look, I'll search my notes. We'll fix it in post.

[B]

All right, Mitch, Speaking of things that we're doing in post, this will be fixed in post in the sense that it will be inserted. Inserted at the proper volume. Although it's going to be played for us live in studio by Emma. I'm talking about your drop.

[A]

Oh, Emma hit him with a drop. They're. They. They crawl and they, they came in through the. The kitchen window. They crawled right through there and they, they overtook Wally and Irma's food. Irma barfs all the time. She barfed today. She bar. She barfed this morning. My on and I moved her. I was like, just don't barf on anything. I'm fine if you barf just on the floor. Just like, don't barf on. On like papers or something. Well, there it was. There it was. Hey, everyone. Over at the future Spirit Halloween location currently known as Headgum Studios, looking for an old photo and instead found a screenshot of a timestamp from the Plant Power fast food episode with Ashley Burch and Mort Burke.

[B]

Oh, how fun was that?

[A]

And the rest is this drop. I'm neither burger Boy nor Spoon Nation. I'm a Gemini guy.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Wow. Dogs forever.

[B]

Woof.

[A]

Woof. Thanks for years of joy, Kramer.

[B]

Thanks, Kramer. Thank you, Kramer.

[A]

Yeah, thanks, Kramer. Great set at the last factory

[B]

[e-mail]. how about this? Back in my day, the only thing that would be cancelled is your order at the honey baked ham store.

[A]

That's good. That is good.

[B]

We're having fun.

[A]

That's damn good.

[B]

And we're going to continue to have fun with our guests, director of the new movie Descendants Wicked Wonderland, now streaming on Disney plus. Kimmy Gatewood is here. Hi, Kimmy.

[C]

Hi, guys.

[B]

Thanks so much for being here.

[A]

I got to put away my phone. I can't to find this thing tonight. It's just not going to happen.

[C]

What am I. I asked you to be on this pod.

[A]

We're very happy to have you forced myself in here. No, no, that is not true. This is 100% the truth that there is. There are still. We talk about this all the time. There's very funny people that we have known from UCB that we haven't had on the podcast. And it's. And it. It's up. It's. There's so many people we know. Yeah, I. I've said this all the time.

[C]

One wrong was righted today.

[A]

1. It's true. That's how I, that is how I view it. It is.

[B]

It's. It's also like the. The. And whatever. The, the, the tricky. The other. The other tricky factor is like someone like you, you know, is very busy and in fact, you were just. You spent a lot of time out of the country. And in years past, like, I know you're working in Ireland, Vancouver. Where do you, like, you go, you're in a new country, you're new territory. You're getting your barons. You're going to be setting there for. Setting up shop for a while.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

What. What are your, like, food? W. Do you have a plan of action, especially as someone who doesn't eat meat?

[C]

Right, right. Yeah. I mean, I have to. I've learned over time when I was staying in hotels, and you just have to eat out all the time. All of a sudden, like, you're just, like, bloated.

[B]

Right.

[C]

Because you're eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner outside. And so the first thing I have to do is get a kitchen, and I'll get, like, I'll get an apartment with a kitchen so that I can make my own breakfast. And breakfast, guys, is eggs and toast or oatmeal with flaxseed.

[B]

There you go.

[C]

But then I'll like, I love in Ireland, you know, being a. They're pretty cool about vegetarianism, but there's a lot of fried food. I remember the first time I was on the road with Chicago City Limits, which is based in New York, a long time ago, and I was a vegetarian. And they were like, here's your vegetarian meal. And I was like, where's the vegetarian meal? They're like, it's right here. It's the chicken dish.

[A]

Oh, my God. That was in Ireland, you said.

[C]

No, that was, like, in the Midwest somewhere was here.

[A]

It was us.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

America. America's tricky, too. Some parts of it for. For not eating meat. Like, it's like, I. I know we've had some vegetarian guests who've traveled with us or. And. Or like, there have been periods where I. I go in and out about what I'm eating and what I'm not eating, and sometimes some stuff is just unavoidable. But you've been somewhat. You haven't been eating meat for I, you know, a while. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And in Ireland, they live. You know, it's a coastal country, so there's lots of fish there. Pescatarian, technically. So, like, they have a lot of fresh fish, and then they boil everything. Everything's boiled. Potatoes, vegetables, meats. Everything is boiled.

[A]

I liked. I liked a good toasty when I was over there.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Toasties are good toasties. I would get a toasty and a Guinness sometimes. I love that bar.

[B]

Describe a toastie for a general audience.

[C]

It is a sandwich that's toasted with no bread. I mean, no Crust. Sorry, no bread. Could you imagine? They just cut the crust. They cut the crust off and they'll put like a little, like a cheese sandwich, basically.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Easy breez.

[B]

Mitch, here's a question for you. If you were like, you had to make this decision, would you rather be a pescatarian, meaning the only animal protein you eat is fish, or a reverse pescatarian, meaning you can't eat fish, but you can eat meat and poultry?

[A]

Man, I'd miss fish so much. But I can never have a burger ever again.

[B]

Yeah, no, you can't.

[A]

I think I would sadly have to get rid of fish, but I think you are the opposite.

[B]

I would. I would be a pest. I'd do pescatarian. I think that'd be. That would definitely be easier for me because that was the thing when I was like, full fledged vegetarian for, you know, a year as an experiment, doing this, this podcast.

[C]

During the. During the podcast.

[B]

Yeah, during the podcast. And yeah, that's a real challenge because a lot of places it was like when we were doing a hot dog month, I would end up sometimes just eating a bun because that was the vegetarian option.

[C]

He was, sorry, hot dog month. The other one. What was the other one that you made? A soup month.

[B]

We did soup month.

[C]

Yeah, Muppet month.

[A]

Muppet Month.

[C]

Muppet Month.

[A]

That was the one that we've done. The podcast is good, though. Remember?

[B]

Podcast is good idea.

[C]

Wait. Love a French fry. They have great French fries in Europe.

[B]

Just eat French fries. French fry month is great.

[A]

Are you writing down French fry Month?

[B]

What if I am? I'm writing it down.

[A]

I think it's pretty easy to remember, though. Then again, I don't remember old guy commenting on Zoomer slang.

[C]

Because the greatest thing about French fries is all the dipping sauces. They're so great.

[B]

What's your favorite dipper?

[C]

I mean, when you're in Europe, you gotta do mayonnaise. That gross.

[B]

But I don't think it's gross at all. I love it.

[C]

And then they usually have, like a spicy mayo, which I like too.

[B]

I know you live in New York for a time.

[A]

The Big Dipper. Yeah, the Big Dipper.

[B]

Okay. Yes, I know you're a bit of a cosmonaut. You love your astronomy.

[A]

I also like the Big Bopper. Hello, baby.

[B]

That's a big fried ketchup.

[A]

The Big Bopper. Talking about the stars is a fun. That's a fun character, too.

[B]

Yeah, that is a fun. You're making me do that.

[A]

Hello, baby.

[B]

If it isn't Orion's belt.

[A]

That's pretty good.

[C]

Hey, it's me, Orion.

[A]

Big papa.

[C]

I didn't know you'd come here to visit. Ryan's a huge fan.

[A]

That was a pretty good character. It had legs.

[B]

It's got something, I think.

[A]

You know what I think I wrote down? I think I did voice memos for some of the guy.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

That's why we can't find it.

[A]

That's why we can't find it. If I take a bathroom break later and find it, maybe I'll play it and see.

[B]

So. Because the voice memos aren't labeled, so you don't know what you're gonna be playing.

[A]

Yeah, I'm afraid to even.

[C]

How many number. What's your number? What do you think your number of Voice Memos is?

[B]

Zero.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think mine's like 2000. That's my guess.

[A]

I'm actually genuinely afraid to.

[B]

Let me see what I got.

[A]

Put any. Like, I know this first one, and I can't do it.

[C]

Just say the number though.

[A]

This first one. Cause it's just from a couple days ago. It was me singing. It was me singing a Homer Simpson parody.

[B]

Let's play some voice memo roulette.

[A]

Let's hear it. That's terrible.

[C]

Oh, my God. That's my biggest nightmare ever. It's just me, like, take out the trash.

[A]

I am genuinely afraid to do some of these.

[C]

Here's an idea. Santa Claus. He's a dog.

[B]

All right, I have a dog is good. Santa.

[C]

Pause. Santa, pause.

[B]

I have my voice memos open. These are mostly unlabeled, and they're mostly like two to four seconds. So I think a lot of them are accidental. But I have. I do have a few meatier ones. And I will say I have, like.

[A]

It would be so fun if you played one. It was just. It was just like a couple of scrolls.

[C]

We're about to put out A dark secret.

[B]

I think I have about 20 total.

[C]

I have hundreds.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Hundreds of them. What about you?

[B]

I do know a lot of them. One of them is the sound of. The sound of bugs or frogs outside of my hotel in Santa Barbara, which was very loud. This is what I was falling asleep to. Hold on. Turn this some bitch up.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Isn't that crazy? That's crazy.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

You gotta use it as Foley. You gotta sell that.

[B]

That's cool. I called the front desk, and I was like, hey, this is really loud outside. The guy's like, yeah, man. It's is. It was nice. It was like, yeah. I don't know what it is.

[C]

Frog cicada and deer mating season.

[B]

So.

[A]

But it sounds like some frog fetish.

[C]

All those frogs are.

[B]

What did you expect the front desk guy to say? I'll tell him the quiet down. No, I was like. I was called him and I was like, good point. Hold on, hold on. Give me some credit. I was like, hey, I know there's nothing you can do about it. I was just curious. Do you know what that is? And he was like, yeah, yeah, I

[A]

know what you're talking about.

[B]

I don't know what it is.

[A]

Frog mating season. You're in a fucking big frog costume

[B]

outside Winder's on his balcony screaming, shut the fuck up. He did say, I believe it's amphibious in nature. I was like, I like this guy. In a way.

[A]

I knew that guy was making fun of you.

[C]

I think he was talking to himself through a voice memo.

[A]

He needed Beavis in my head.

[B]

All right.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wait, what did you say?

[B]

Wait, did you say this guy frogs? Why did you go there? She said amphibious. You think that's sexual? Yeah.

[C]

Oddly enough, that was one of my boy as well. How about a guy who frogs? Why do I do

[A]

you needed Beavis and Butthead Frog baseball, remember?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Remember?

[B]

That set them off the first short.

[A]

Do you remember frog baseball? You like us came up during that stupid time of.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And they got a revelation when that

[C]

it was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

[A]

They're still the Beavis. Butthead are still going. By the way, I want to say this.

[B]

Beavis about to do America. Great comedy feature.

[A]

Great movie.

[B]

Very, very funny.

[A]

It's a great movie.

[C]

Mike Judge, he's a comedy genius.

[A]

We've been doing comedy for a while and I. There was. And I was gonna. I said I was saving this for the podcast. There's a poster that my mom put up that's above my bed and it's for the New York Sketch Fest 2007. And it has the lineup and the Apple sisters are in it and the birthday boys are in it and like Pangea 3000 whitest kids. You know, I'm trying to think of like a lot of sketch wasn't that

[C]

wasn't like Oren Breimer. It was just his name on it.

[A]

I think maybe yes, Brytanic was on. Maybe was on there. Or maybe it was Harvard sailing team. I forget who was. I forgot everyone who was on there. But there was. But you guys were on there with. And we used to see you all the time at the UCB theater.

[B]

Apple scissors. Quite a show.

[A]

What a show.

[C]

Thanks, pal.

[A]

It was. Yeah. Yeah.

[C]

We're gonna. It's gonna be our 20 year anniversary next February.

[A]

You know what?

[B]

That's unreal.

[C]

Yikes.

[A]

You know what's crazy? The Birthday Boys also are. Is at 20 years.

[C]

Let's have a double double 20 years. What do they call that? I wish there was a 20 cent thing we could.

[A]

Are you guys gonna do anything?

[C]

Yeah. Cause our first show is February 14th, 2007.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

So we'll probably have like, either it'll be a Christmas show this December or we'll do like a Valentine's Day show or something. I think it'd be fun.

[B]

That's rad.

[A]

I'm Kalpakis on the line here. And see, I'm not gonna call him, but I'm gonna see what the first. He'll know.

[C]

I know. Well, I mean, if it was 2007, your first show.

[A]

Yes. You know what? We maybe did not too shabby in 2006. And that maybe was the first Birthday Boys performance.

[B]

So you may have already hit 20 years.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Thanks.

[A]

Thanks, Wags.

[B]

Milestone may have already passed.

[C]

Yeah, we perform like the Apples. We still perform like once or twice a year now. And like, Sarah lives in Las Vegas. She's been doing. She's moved there to do Jersey Boys and now she does like, she did Magic Bike for a spell, which was fun. And now she does absinthe and this Atomic Saloon show. And we have a great, like, great audience in Vegas. It's been fun.

[A]

Yeah. That rules. You miss it. You do. You do miss. Like it is. It's sad to me when I go and like do a performance or something at a theater or like even just go to a black box theater and it's like, oh, you miss. I miss doing that and doing sketch and being in there all the. It took up most of our lives. And some people have regrets about that. Not pointing at you specifically, but.

[B]

I know, but. But I don't. I don't miss it. That's the thing. Like that my. I don't have nostalgia.

[A]

You don't miss. You don't have nostalgia for at all.

[B]

That's like that. That. That part of my life is over. I'm just like. I'm just move on.

[C]

God. So cut and dry. Slam the door on sketch comedy.

[A]

What we call terrifying in many ways.

[B]

I'll also say, I can say this right here in the Doughboys podcast. The Doughboys will never hit 20 years. We're closing up shop before our hearts.

[A]

Will give Out Spoon man and friends will live on. Don't worry. I really. I won't do it now, but I want to go to the bathroom and listen to see if I can find the old guy commenting on Zoom at some point.

[B]

Out of context.

[C]

That sounds horrible. I want to go in the bathroom and look for that old guy.

[A]

The first audio message. I'll just tell you because this is the type of embarrassment it was. You know the song the real Slim Shady?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It was me just saying you all act like you've never seen Bart Simpson before. That's in the first. That's the first voice memo. So I didn't want to. I don't want to. I'm just letting people know this is the sort of thing that's on there. So I can't just randomly play one because it will be bad.

[B]

No, but this sounds like a whole new Patreon tier. Yes.

[C]

I remember a lot of my voice memos are just Apple Sisters harmonies. Just like me doing. This is the middle part. I'm an April fool for you, darling. And now the high part, you know,

[A]

and then if you don't write those even mini thoughts down.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Then you forget them. Then you drive yourself. Like I am doing now with this is. This is like breaking my brain. Is that if I don't write those things down, I will obsess about it for forever. Like, right. Like. Like that's what happens with me. I'm just like. And then you'll go back and listen to him be like, that was stupid and I didn't have to write it. It didn't matter. But like I have to write all those micro thoughts down.

[B]

You and I also both have OCD brain. Yeah. Like, that's the. Let's like. Let's see. And. And I think like dwelling on. I mean the. The recur. I wonder how much of it is a release valve of just kind of almost getting it out of your mind as opposed to a thing that you're going to dwell on and ruminate on. I don't know.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

No, that's OCD brain. That's not just. Just artist.

[A]

It's a cute. Yeah, I go crazy. I think it's a com. I think it is combo of the We. We both are diagnosed obsessive compulsive.

[B]

I'm gonna get tired. You might have to.

[A]

You might. You might need.

[C]

Oh, no. Who's that doctor again?

[A]

Our do. The sheer doctor. Wer and I have.

[B]

Let's not dox our doctor.

[A]

We can bleep it. Dr. I thought we were gonna add him into the. I thought we were gonna add him in.

[C]

He's gonna have a segment. He's gonna be right here. Wer st. Who's got better blood work?

[B]

Well.

[A]

Well, you have better. You have better tea than I have testosterone.

[B]

I do have a good tea level.

[A]

Yeah, he got a perfect.

[C]

Is that what dudes are talking about now? What's your T, bruh?

[A]

I mean, he got a perfect T score. He did.

[C]

What's a perfect t Store score.

[B]

I. I just hit the maximum that you could get on the test.

[C]

Listen, I could tell, bro, but I didn't go in.

[B]

Like, I wasn't like, I. I went in. I am Mr. D. But I. Like, that was just, like, a total shock to me because I. I don't think of myself as a. As virile alpha male. I think of myself as beta as they come. But I just was like, I pity the buddy. Yeah. I got the test was not even me trying to seek out that information. It was that I would start a new medication, and my. My then psychiatrist was like, this has a side effect of lowering testosterone levels, so you should get it tested. This was after being on the medication for a while, and we'll see if we need to adjust it. And then, yeah, I hit the math Max is the.

[A]

It was a straight jacket. This can sometimes lower testosterone.

[C]

Trying to put it on you is the. The test for testosterone, they're just like, pick up this weight. You be like, no, it's just like, well, zero.

[B]

I was shocked. I. I still think there was some mistake.

[C]

I'm gonna check my estrogen now. You ladies know, right? You can tell.

[A]

You can tell the doctor for checking men's tea. The doctor takes you to Hooters, and he's like, you horny, bro? Just asking the whole time.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

You take all the girls to drag Race, and it's just like, we having fun.

[B]

I want to talk about. I want to talk about Muppets. We did Muppet podcast. You worked on Muppets Mayhem. And you're also a Muppet fan yourself.

[C]

Yeah, very much so.

[B]

It's like a dream realized. When this. When this happens. When you're working with the Muppets, what is your feeling?

[C]

Yeah, I mean, I grew up watching the Muppet Show. I loved the Muppet show, and I've been compared to a Muppet many times in my life. Which Muppet? Oh, just in general, your Muppet like qualities. And I'm like, thank you.

[A]

My sister gets mad because I compare her to miss In A loving way. I compare her to Miss Piggy.

[C]

Oh, it's the greatest.

[A]

And she hates it, but also loves it because Miss Piggy rules.

[C]

I mean, just to do like the voices like Miss Piggy and Fozzie Bear and, you know, Kermit and stuff, it was just like, so fun. And Statler and Waldorf, I mean, Rebecca and I on Rebecca Johnson from the Apple Sisters, we were on Glow together and we were basically the Statler and Waldorf of the show. It was so fun.

[A]

Two of the best. And also it is fun mapping Monta. Like, my dad and my Uncle Jim were like Statler and Waldorf. You see, and I've said this before, but you see a lot of Miss Piggy, Kermit relationships out wild. The Muppets are. The Muppets are life.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Because you see Muppets out in the wild.

[B]

Yeah, Muppets everywhere.

[C]

And so I got into this, like, world. I directed a show called the Helpsters. And it's a Apple show about teaching kids how to code. And it's with the Sesame Workshop. So they like did all the puppets for it. And then through. Through that, they invited me to do Sesame Street. So I did a Sesame Street. I did like a Christmas episode and some other things.

[B]

Incredible.

[C]

And My daughter was 4, so I was like, I'm done parenting. She met Elmo and stuff. And then from there. So the best part about puppets and Muppets and all these guys is like Sesame street in particular. The first question that I could not believe someone was asking me is that they was working with Cookie Monster. And he was like, they're like, do you want the cookie to like go down his or do you want it to break apart? And I was like, this is the most iconic question I could have ever been asked in my life. Obviously it's break apart, right? Like how many pieces. It was just. It's so magical and like getting up close and with them and specifically like the Muppets. Cause animal lived in my grandfather's car growing up. Like he had a little puppet animal. And I was like, this is the best looking animal I've ever seen. Then I worked with the real animal and went back and looked at it. Cause my brother still has it. It's so fucked up. It's like an off brand anim, you know, I thought it was the greatest.

[A]

I. I have.

[C]

I.

[A]

My.

[C]

My.

[A]

My cousin Lee and her husband Carlo had these two things called Turkey Lurkey and Charlie Barley. And they meant a lot to me growing up. And. And they just. He Carlo gifted them to me just recently. He was like, it's now your time to. I gotta bring in Turkey Lurky and Charlie Barley.

[B]

These were puppets. What are we.

[A]

They were. They were kind of stuffed animals. I gotta bring them. I gotta bring them. But when you're like, something like that, remembering something like that, like, it's. I mean, those things mean a lot to you when you're young, younger, and they still mean a lot to me. W. It was a very moving gift when he gave them to me.

[B]

My. Like when my parents were like, cleaning out a bunch of stuff and was like, hey, do you want.

[A]

Oh, my gosh. This ends with them in the dumpster.

[B]

Well, no. Well, there was a moment.

[C]

Your parents

[A]

taking his parents, dropping them in the dumpster.

[B]

They're doing great.

[A]

They have a lovely dumpster.

[C]

Yeah, it's very nice.

[A]

I have a.

[B]

Like, I. I just. Yeah, I did want to throw a bunch of stuff away, and then Natalie talked me out of it and then. But I do. I. I was like, I don't know where the. What's that wedding ring? There was like a. Like, I have this doll. Like, I. Like, I had this one doll. I think it was a. Mikey was a doll. It was just like this little doll I remember playing with as a. Like a very, very young kid. And I was like, I don't know what the hell to do with this. And I was like, but I don't. I feel weird, like, throwing this away and I can't donate this because no one's gonna want this, like, soiled. Like. Like, you know, 30 year old doll, you know? You know, that thing's been.

[C]

You know, the toilet doll.

[A]

That thing's praying for death. It sounds like.

[B]

Well, so now it's like, it's fate. Is. Is. It's in a drawer with my basketball cards.

[A]

Okay, that's fine.

[B]

Is that okay? Do you think he's all right in there?

[A]

Yeah, he's. I think he's. I think he's okay in there.

[C]

Watch Toy Story 5 and find out. Like, help me.

[A]

Fluids coming out of him. What? What? What?

[C]

Did you.

[A]

What? You saw Toy Story fire.

[C]

Did.

[A]

Did you see it with your lovely wife or.

[B]

No, no, I saw it solo.

[A]

That's what I'm talking about.

[C]

Wait. Okay. Tell me your favorite Muppet.

[B]

Wait, Maybe we did see it together.

[A]

I liked it. Wait, okay, I. I'm going to tell you my favorite Muppet.

[B]

I think we saw that one together. I saw something else.

[A]

I was saying that if I went and saw Toy Story 5 solo, I'd wear like a hoodie and sunglasses because I do think that it is, I do think that is the level of,

[B]

of we're going to see that's more suspicious in the hoodie and sunglasses. Got like single guy in a children's movie.

[C]

You kids want to see Toy Story? I got an extra ticket.

[A]

I feel weird going alone to Toy Story 5. You gotta go on a date or something or you and I are going to see Minions and Monsters on Friday.

[C]

And it's good. Okay, good.

[A]

And that is, and that is for her birthday. That is, that's. I'm excited. I'm excited to see it. But going to see Toy Story 5. I see a lot of movies by myself now as I've gotten old, older and I, and I, and it's hard. It's, it's just Toy Story 5 is just, it's just trickier.

[C]

I feel somebody and cry together.

[A]

I, I, I, I think it's beautiful. I do think it's beautiful. But it just is hard for me to go to Toy Story solo. Right. Is that weird or.

[B]

No, No. I understand being self conscious, especially as a man of like, like, I don't want to be in a, in a women's space or a, or a space with children where I'm going to feel. Yes. A guy who's alone and maybe I feel creepy. I understand that feeling. I, it, yeah. Yeah.

[A]

All right. There we go.

[C]

This guy's got too much testosterone. Dress him anywhere.

[A]

That's what I'm. You put the sunglasses and the hoodie on. I'm going into Toy Story 5. I'm going to the woman's locker room. I'm going all over the place.

[B]

Well, like, I have so, like, I, I, I'll take yoga, but I've had, I've had a number of situations where I'm like the one man in a yoga class. So like, my move is I'll go to the front and I'll be in the front row so I don't seem like I'm like, I'd feel weird being behind a bunch of, of women who don't know me.

[C]

Like an 80s movie.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So like, like I don't. Dan Aykroyd was definitely in it, but then I, but then I did that and I went to this class and then I went back to it and the teacher was like, hey, front row, welcome back. I was like, I don't want to be front row guy. That's even worse. So then I just stopped going.

[C]

I guess you got called out for Being a good student, you're putting on

[A]

quite a show for those people. So you got, you got quite the dumper on you.

[B]

It's faded. I've lost some weight, unfortunately. I've, I've got, like, you know, the dumper's going away. No.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, and we're saying this in the, in the shadow of Kyle Lowry's retirement. The NBA great with one of the, the, the, the. The plumpest asses. He's got a real backyard, and God bless him for it. I like, I, I, unfortunately, it is you. You can't localize weight loss as, as we've all experienced, as anyone who's ever gone through that cycle is experienced. And so I was like, well, I don't want to lose weight in my ass. It's like, you know, one of my best qualities, but unfortunately, it slimmed down a little, but. Bet. Wow.

[A]

I did not know this one.

[B]

I think it's still, you know, it's still got some, some stock to it because, you know, I'll do, I'll do some, you know, I do my squats.

[C]

Check it out later while you go to the bathroom.

[B]

I do my lunges. I, I certainly work on my glutes, but I, you know, I would have, I would like a little bit more meat, you know what I mean?

[A]

I, I.

[B]

More cushion for the pushing, as they say.

[A]

Yeah, this is, it seems like it's, there's still a lot. Yeah, there's still a lot going back there.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Should doughboys go get BBL else? Should doughboys get BBLs?

[A]

I heard they're, I heard they're dangerous. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

If you don't, if you just, like,

[C]

you don't want to die.

[A]

You don't want to die. Yeah.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We don't want to die.

[B]

No, we don't want to die.

[A]

Right? We don't want them.

[B]

Let's go back to Muppets. You were asking, what's your favorite Muppet? I. I will say there's Miss Piggy, but that's an obvious answer, so I will. I will pivot. I will take a D. I do think Miss Piggy is, like, one of the great characters in fiction, but I will pivot, and I will say if I want to go a slightly deeper cut. I like Bunsen. Bunsen's fun.

[C]

Yes, Bunsen's great. Yeah.

[A]

Your dumper is like the national, like, deficit. It's like, we can chip away at it, but that thing's, it's never going away.

[C]

It's the Bunsen, head of dumpers.

[A]

I mean, look, I'm classic. Fozzie Bear is Fozzie and Kermit, which I like. I know that. That's boring.

[B]

Why is that boring?

[A]

It's kind of boring. I mean, I love all. I love all of them, but. But you know what? A low key one. You'll like this. Amelia. Come in and know me better, man. From the Ghost of Christmas Present from Muppet Christmas Caroline.

[B]

That's the one off Muppet. Yeah.

[A]

And you know what that reminds me of also, who I like. I like Sweetums quite a bit. We were talking about Muppets. That I am like, Sweetums is a big monster.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Which is what I'm like. And then Fozzie Bear is an unfunny comedian.

[B]

Except you're funny.

[A]

Oh, right, right. No, you're right.

[B]

So you're not like Fozzie.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also that. I just wanted that for myself. You can stay unfunny.

[B]

Done

[A]

wise. You're very funny.

[B]

Oh, what a nice thing to say.

[C]

They made up so fast. I'm so, so relieved. I was stressed out.

[A]

People compare him to. People were comparing him to Kermit over the month. Month. And I didn't in.

[C]

Why not? Because you're jelly.

[A]

Yeah, I guess so.

[C]

Okay. Yeah.

[A]

And like, I thought of myself. I thought of myself as a Kermit. I never got the picture of me as Kermit. My f. We found my sister's picture of her as Kermit, but we.

[B]

Do you have the picture of you with just a leaf covering your dick? Right?

[A]

Yes, of course we have.

[B]

Okay, great. We'll put that in the video. You just can't show it on YouTube because it gets taken down.

[A]

Will it get taken down? Yeah.

[C]

Take it off of Instagram.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Obviously it's for. It's him as a child.

[C]

How's the dumper in that one?

[A]

That would be insane. If I showed her a picture of me with a leaf over my dick now, you psychopath. If I was like, you want to see it? And it's just me naked with a leaf over myself.

[C]

That's so funny, though. A button goes out. Boop. Hey, Kimmy, you got to go.

[A]

That's insane that you had to say I was.

[B]

I trying to clarify.

[A]

Well, you didn't have any ambiguity.

[C]

I feel like I'm going to get pranked right now. You probably wouldn't take down the one of you as an adult fault. To be fair.

[B]

That's true. Mitchell, I'll say this. You don't like the comparison of me to Kermit, how about another Muppet I like Walter. You are can do Walter.

[A]

You are Walter. A thousand percent.

[B]

I love it.

[A]

I cosign that I think that you are 100% or Walter.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I truly believe that whatever Muppet you identify with is the Muppet you are.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

I can get behind copyright.

[B]

What's your answer?

[C]

Is it Miss Piggy? It's. It's animal.

[B]

Oh, animal. Yeah. Animal Hoot.

[C]

Yeah. Which is why it was, like, so amazing to work with, like, the Mayhem, specifically.

[B]

Yeah. When you're. When you're working with like that, that's. That's gotta be a wild thing. Like, to actually be working with, you know, animal and the, you know, obviously all the artists and crew behind that. When I worked on a Jim Henson production myself.

[C]

Which one?

[B]

Earth to Ned. Yeah, with Liza Skinner. And we. That was like the thing. I was just like, man, these puppeteers and the craftsmen who, like, you know, engineer these things and build these things are so incredibly talented. And it's just a world I don't really understand. But you're, like, directing this. So he's like, how. What is. What is that process like?

[C]

Well, I don't know if this is interesting to anyone, but it was interesting to me. It basically, like. So there's a couple different, like, ways that you can puppeteer these animals. These animals, these Muppets. So in Sesame street, they're on the floor on Rollies, so that they can talk to the kids. And here's a fun thing. When normal, do a puppet sound, be like, hi, my name is whatever. Right. You would go like that, but it's, hi, my name is. You mouth open when you talk. Which is the opposite of what we kind of do.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And in Mayhem, they do Muppet style, which is they build platforms that are 3 foot tall. And the puppeteers are below the platform here. And the actors, the human actors are up above. So it's basically like a death trap of like.

[A]

I was gonna say we didn't talk about this, but if you have claustrophobia or something, it would be. You're hunched over doing that, and then also there's people on top of you. It would be kind of nerve wracking.

[C]

It's a very collaborative process, though. Cause they all have their own screens, which I'm sure you saw in the Ned. But like, it's like, as a director, you're talking to, like, you're working with them. Cause they have to make sure that the puppets are, like, alive. Cause they need both eyes to be towards the Camera to come alive for them to perform. So they would be looking. I would have to tell them when I was switching cameras. It was a very, like, you had to really, really plan and think in a different way. Almost like a multicam.

[B]

Wow, that's wild.

[C]

Like live TV in a way, you know.

[A]

There you go. There I am.

[B]

Little blonde boy.

[A]

A little blonde boy.

[C]

What if I was like, oh, so muscular. Kimmy, you have to go.

[A]

I was looking pretty jacked.

[C]

That's. So you were just. Adam, like.

[A]

Oh yeah. I just thought it was funny to put. I was at, I was just. That was that silly. You know the silly age where you put a leaf over your penis and you.

[B]

So this wasn't for Halloween or anything?

[A]

No, this was just.

[B]

It, this is, this was just random.

[A]

This is random.

[B]

You just did this.

[A]

Yeah, this is. You think, you think on Halloween I'm out there on the porch with the, in the, in the buff.

[B]

I thought it was a costume for some reason. Yeah, because it's at night.

[A]

No, this is.

[C]

This.

[A]

There was a stickyard next to it. So there was nothing. It was an empty lot next to my house.

[B]

So you just go outside, you disrobe and you put a leaf over you?

[A]

Yeah, that was funny. Kim, you said that your daughter's at, at summer camp.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Were you ever a summer camp person?

[C]

You know, we did like tennis camp down the street, but I never got, I never got to do the sleepaway camp. And I am like my daughter, if she wants to do sleepaway camp, she can live her best life. Like I'm like making up for the sleepaway camp I never got to go to.

[A]

I, I, I did. Did you do sleep away camp? I did sleep away camp.

[B]

I did a lot of sleepaway camp. Oh, I did no shortage of sleepaway camp cuz I was the Boy Scouts of America.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So there was a lot of, I mean there were routinely week long excursions and sometimes they were sometimes cabin on a lake.

[A]

Sweep away camp or, or. No. Well, I did that Camp Fatima.

[B]

Yeah, I mean I did boy scout camps. Boy scout camps. We would have them but like a lot of times we'd be camping but they, but you would go to like a, a camp for a week. And then, but then also I did music camps, whereas like, like instrumental music. And so we'd be up there and that would be like more of a cabin experience. And I, you know, I never, I never liked any of it. I always just want to be home playing video games.

[C]

Heard about this Wavy Gravy camp camp that is up in like San Francisco. It's like a circus camp that you

[A]

can do and like for adults.

[C]

No, it's for kids, but. I know, dang. But that sounds like my dream camp. You do acting? You do like, acrobatics.

[A]

Yeah. That sounds fun as hell.

[C]

I know with Wavy Gravy's camp, man.

[A]

I did do theater camp as a boy. I did.

[C]

Oh, Jelly, I'm so jealous. If you did Boy Scout camp, you did theater camp.

[A]

I didn't go to like sleep away theater camp. But I.

[C]

This is where the 10 testosterone comes in. Sorry again.

[A]

It's a, it's true. I did Raise the Curtain, the summer camp. But it was, that was in Boston. Yeah. And Quincy, Mass. And that was, that was, that was not, that wasn't like a stay over camp. That was, that was just. We went during the day. I, I, I loved Raise the Curtain. That was. I played Charlie Brown, your Good Man Charlie Brown. I, I played Curly in Oklahoma.

[C]

I don't have my phone, but I played Ado Annie in Oklahoma. And I just found a picture of myself playing Snoopy in your Good Man Charlie Brown. Look at this.

[A]

The two things you reference.

[C]

Bing bong.

[A]

I love it.

[B]

What was your wardrobe for Snoopy?

[C]

White pants.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

White top, dog ears, black nose.

[B]

Oh, how about that? So you were in the mascot costume.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

How about that's, that's rad.

[A]

Were you ever Camp Burgess and Camp Fatima? Even though I told you that my in line with all this, my mom had found out that a priest at Camp Fatima had the like, been up to no good the summer before, and she still sent me there, which is the craziest thing of all.

[C]

Was he cheating on his taxes? No. Good.

[A]

My mom called and she was like, I heard about this thing, like, it's not happening anymore. Right? And they're like, no. And then she sent me there, which is crazy. And then Camp Burgess I went to. But, But Camp Burgess was a sleepover camp. And then, and then graze. The curtain was just. You would go during the day and then it was at the same time as basketball camp. And so I would go into the cafeteria and all my friends are in basketball camp. And like, what are you doing here? And I was like, nothing. I would just have to lie to pretend that I breathing exercises was a bummer.

[B]

I'll just say that was not unique to Camp Fatima. Whichever camp you were talking about, the guy was like, that happened. I like, at my music camp, there was an adult counselor who got into trouble for, you know, being a Taxes for taxes. Let's do taxes.

[C]

Putting fruit in the vegetable drawer.

[B]

And Boy Scouts of America attracted a lot of adult male leaders who had a predilection for tax evasion. So, like, a lot of them were pushed away.

[A]

Were you ever a counselor?

[C]

They were lying about that. 1099.

[B]

I was never a counselor.

[A]

Now, were you ever a counselor?

[C]

No, I was a.

[A]

You would have been a great counselor.

[C]

Tell me about it.

[A]

You would have been great.

[C]

I was an orientation leader at college.

[B]

That rocks.

[C]

That was so fun. I did a lot of sketch comedy for kids who didn't ask for it.

[A]

Speaking of characters, I have two characters stories.

[B]

Okay, great.

[A]

None of them are fun, but when I was. When. When I was at.

[C]

I don't know why I'm telling the story.

[A]

When I. When I went to Ithaca, my. My orientation leader. I've told this story before. This is. The issue is that I've told every story. My orientation leader at. At Ithaca, they're like, say your name and say stuff about it. I was like, my name is Mike. And then she was like, hey, no characters. Because I had a Boston accent wise. And she thought that I was doing.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[A]

He thought that I got up, so it was so embarrassing. And I was like, I'm not doing a character. This is just, like, how I talk. And then she was like, oh, so sorry.

[C]

Be like, oh, this a guy. What a ham.

[A]

And I didn't want to talk in front of anyone at that point in my life. And then so she was like, don't. No characters. And it was very embarrassing.

[C]

We've talked about this. So I went to Syracuse, and you went to Ithaca. Yes. And I played at the haunt. I was at a ska band. Spoiler alert.

[B]

I was also SCA Band.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

I played other brother Daryl.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, my God. We could. We could still do the brass section.

[A]

Yeah, we can jam the Haunters right on, like, a river or something. Right? Wasn't it, like.

[B]

Yes, I think it was. I would say the go to yes.

[C]

Yeah. Yep, yep, yep. We opened for Bim Scala Bim.

[A]

Wow. That's pretty good.

[C]

Yeah, we're pretty good.

[A]

The other character story was. I was just gonna say that counselors are. They put up with too much shit. And I remember this one counselor, Trevor, and he was doing a character. He's like, my name's Mr.

[B]

Cool.

[A]

Did I tell this story on the podcast before? And we would always call Trevor a stupid jerk because we were 10 years old. And he was like, hey, I'm Mr. Cool. Like, I'm Mr. Cool. And then we're like, you're Trevor, you stupid jerk. And then he was like, hey, I'm. I'm not a stupid jerk. I'm. And he like got. He like broke character was like, I'm not, I'm not a stupid jerk, guys. Give me some respect, okay? Like, you can't say that to me. Anyways, I'm Mr. Cool.

[B]

She went back to Mr.

[A]

Cool.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Which is so embarrassing for like an adult man to have to be like, that's intense, silly. And like, you have to respect me.

[C]

I don't have boogers in my nose, okay?

[A]

But that's why, that's why, that's why I feel like counselors are the best people in the world. And I've never, I never, I never done anything like that. Now I'm too old. I feel like it's a.

[C]

Well, I'm a. Ls Girl Scout leader now.

[B]

Oh, there you go.

[C]

That's basically my version of camp counselor. Cuz I'm like, we're going to do craps like that rules.

[A]

That's fun. Giving back in that way is fun. And I, I don't do it.

[B]

I'm as a, as a, a Boy Scout. A former Boy Scout. I would not recommend Boy Scouts to anybody. I know some people have good experiences, but Girl Scout seems like a, like a, a, A comper. Like a. The complete opposite end of the spectrum. Like a wholesome organization. I have family members who have been through the, through the Girl Scouts. And it seems like this is a great like bonding, like, like, you know, a great space. A great like, you know, like educational sort of environment. It's just like completely opposite of, of Boy Scouts, which is just like this, you know, paramilitary Christian indoctrination or, you know, it's like completely different.

[C]

Get your knives out. Yeah. Which ones, Danny?

[B]

I literally remember like we learned knots and then kids started tying each other up. I was like, this is psycho.

[C]

God. I know. The funny thing is it's like most of like being a leader is just like, could you cut the out?

[A]

Oh yeah.

[C]

You're like trying to learn something cool like navy knots or whatever. And they're just like, what if I put my feet together?

[A]

I remember trying to walk. A counselor yelling through our window, like, stop showing each other your pubes. This is the truth.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

Cuz we were like, show. We were trying to be like, I have pubes now. This is the sort of stuff that happens at camp. Yeah.

[B]

That's just good clean fun.

[A]

It's good clean fun. It's a part of growing.

[C]

Yeah. The Girl Scouts, you know, is a lot of the. Is selling stuff, right? You're basically, they're entrepreneurs. And I'm like, this is a kind of a Mary Kay scheme, you know, like go door to door. Girl Scout cookies. You are Girl Scout cookies. You have every kind of Girl Scout cookies.

[A]

Yeah. Have people, have people turned on Girl Scout cookies recently?

[C]

I feel like there was a, there is or was a documentary that's coming out about Girl Scout cookie season. And, like, listen, the kids love it because, like, when you're 10, 11 years old, all you want to do is have a store. I don't know why, but, like, every child was like, I need a store. I want to sell stuff. And I'm a business person. And so that's, I was gonna say

[A]

I've been benefiting from old Girl Scout cookie season for years. Wags. I, I, I reap the benefits of, of some Samoas I love.

[B]

I, I personally love is Samoa's the top of your hierarchy.

[A]

I think samos are still up there.

[B]

Yeah, I think Samoa. I think I'm a Samoa guy.

[C]

I mean, like, that in mind, guys. Yeah. I know a dealer.

[A]

Over time. Thin mint. I, I've come around on thin mints and also the peanut butter ones.

[B]

What are those? Tag alongs?

[C]

Tagalongs. This is my number one.

[B]

I used to love tagalongs. Then I develop a peanut allergy.

[C]

Oh, no. Yeah. How did you find out?

[B]

I started having, like, anaphylactic reactions to consuming peanuts, and then I got tested.

[C]

Did you get it on the pod?

[A]

Yeah, we had.

[B]

I didn't think about that pod.

[A]

We had Mr. Peanut as a guest,

[B]

and I sucked him out.

[A]

Hello, friend.

[B]

Oh, you want to eat me, huh?

[C]

How about this? I was a Boy Scout, too. Slice, like, slice. Serial killer. Mr. Peanut. That's horrible. I'm sorry. That's so scary. That's the worst one. That's all right.

[B]

But, But I did like tagalogs a lot when I had them.

[A]

I don't like it personally. I wish that he could still eat peanuts. It makes me sad because it's in

[C]

a lot of stuff.

[A]

It's in a lot of stuff.

[B]

It's in a lot of stuff. But I, I was, I always say, like, like, Samoa is definitely up there. I'm trying to think of what else is like, you know, I feel like the, I kind of like the, those, those lemon cookies. They're like, kind of a sneaky one. Yeah. Lemon up. So those are kind of like a sneaky like. Like up a higher tier. A Girl Scout cookie.

[C]

There's also different names for east coast and West Coast.

[B]

This I've learned.

[A]

I.

[B]

So what we call Samoas are called caramel delights. Caramel delights. That's right. Yes.

[C]

I don't want to eat that.

[B]

No, no, thank you. That's not a caramel to.

[C]

No, thank you.

[A]

That's there. Those are not it. Those are not.

[B]

Not. Look, can we get a full list of cookies also?

[A]

I. I gotta be clear. Did they change it for Is Samo was Samoa's. Was it a. Was it a cultural thing or.

[B]

No, I don't want to.

[A]

I don't want to rant against it.

[B]

If it's a cultural thing, they would

[C]

have changed it on both sides. I think so. I don't. I don't think it's.

[A]

All right, good.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Then, then, then, cuz.

[C]

I want Samoa.

[A]

Yeah, I want Samoa. I want Samoa cookies.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Yeah. It's not a soup plantation. Sweet tomato situation.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Oh, God, I forgot about that place.

[B]

All right, the 2026 Girl Scout cookie lineup is Explore More.

[C]

Explore Mores. Which are brownie cookies.

[B]

Okay. Like a sandwich cookie.

[C]

Right.

[B]

Adventure.

[C]

Fs. Right. They're adventurefuls. Oh, no, those are the brownie cookies. Explore Mores. Tell me, what are explorers? They're like two little.

[B]

It looks like two little chocolate cookies

[C]

with like a chocolate cream in the middle.

[B]

Cream like Oreo. Yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

And then trefoils.

[C]

Trefoils.

[B]

I actually like the trefoils. I love a shortbread peanut butter sandwich. Do Si Dos. Oh, I remember the dosy doughs.

[C]

Yeah, I wrote them off and I actually like them. What's that? I wrote them off for a while. Now I like them again.

[A]

None of them are like a little. Not as good, but Nutter Butter. Almost all of them are good.

[C]

There was something probably two years ago at a raspberry rally, and it was only. It was horrible and there was an Internet frenzy about it. Peanut butter patties, AKA Tagalongs, Thin mints.

[A]

Lemon ups.

[C]

Lemonades. Oh, yeah, that's east coast lemonades. Well, they look like different cookies actually. Lemonades, look.

[B]

Wait, I actually can't tell.

[C]

Yeah, they probably are different. They might be sandwich cookies.

[B]

Oh, yes, that is a lemonade.

[C]

Is a sandwich version of that.

[B]

Caramel chocolate chip. Gluten free and then toffee test stick.

[C]

Yeah, that's gluten free.

[B]

Gluten free as well.

[C]

There's something called toast Toastieser or Toast up for.

[B]

Maybe those have been discontinued. This is the 2026. 2026 lineup.

[C]

And the fun thing about being in Vancouver is that the, the woman that I stay with, she is a girl guide leader cuz she has four daughters. And so they only do one style of cookie twice a year. So they have like sandwiches, like cookie sandwiches once and then the other one, one forget what the other one is. But they only do one style of cookie.

[B]

That's kind of cool.

[C]

So when they, when I was against girl Scout seasoned, all the Canadians, they were like, what the hell is happening? And they bought one of every single one. Like it's just like pure American consumerism, like on display.

[A]

Are we about to hate Girl Scout cookie season? When is it? Is it, is it soon or not till January. January. Oh, that's crazy.

[C]

Yeah, we're on a break.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, I guess it makes sense. It's during the school. School year.

[B]

Right?

[A]

So we can pump those cookies out.

[C]

Is the pump those cookies out.

[B]

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It's.

[B]

You know, there's wine there, whatever. It's a place where you can go and have a glass of wine, which is the thing I like to do. And also, great place to watch some World cup, which I was doing a lot of with some fellow merry makers, some fellow vacationers. We were all having a blast watching these high stakes games. And booking on booking.com was surprisingly easy because of the search, the options. And I put the whole thing together on impulse. I was like, not going to do it. And I was like, I can just do it. And I did it. So you know what? Take the initiative. Go on. Book that trip. It's easy. Booking.combooking.

[C]

yeah.

[B]

Hey buddy, let's face it, after a night with drinks, I don't bounce back the next day like I used to. Not a young man anymore. So I have to make a choice. I can either have a great night or a great next day. What kind of Choice is that. That is until I found pre alcohol zbiotics. Pre alcohol probiotic drink is the world's first genetically engineered probiotic. It was invented by PhD scientists to tackle rough mornings after drinking. Here's how it works. When you drink, alcohol gets converted into a toxic byproduct in the gut. Don't I know it. It's a buildup of this byproduct, not dehydration. That's to blame for rough days after drinking. And we've all had them. Pre alcohol produces an enzyme to break this byproduct down. Just remember to make pre alcohol your first drink of the night. Drink responsibly and you'll feel your best tomorrow. You know, every time I have pre alcohol before drinks, I notice a difference. Next day, even after a night out, I can confidently plan on going on a long walk. Going out to see a movie, going to the gym. You know, I gotta pump some iron. I gotta do some squats. I could do some deadlifts. I gotta do some bench presses. The classic lifts. Military press. Throw that in there. Why not? Not all barbell training, but it's maybe the focus of things. But however you wanna work out is up to you. And if you're using zbiotics, you'll have the flexibility. The day after, a little bit of imbibing, if you catch my drift. July is packed with BBQs, fireworks, late weekends and late nights with friends. Keep the good times rolling into the next day. Drink pre alcohol before you go out and wake up ready for whatever Sunday brings. Church, maybe. Church? What's wrong with church? Nothing. And you know what? They got that communion wine. You know what's up? Remember to head to zbiotics.com doughboys and use the code doughboys at checkout for 15% off foreign. So I, I want to get, I want to be general. Before we get into to Little Caesars, which we're talking about today, what are your pizza preferences? Like? Like, like your ideal. Especially as someone who doesn't eat meat.

[C]

Yeah. Well, I can just talk about LA pizza because I do controversially, like from New York, love LA pizza so much. Much. I love triple beam. I love the mushroom pizza from triple beam and I love that butternut squash or that acorn squash pizza that they have so much. I recreated it during COVID Wow. Multiple times.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

I love it.

[A]

We talked about a place that we both love.

[C]

Oh yeah.

[B]

Real quick. What are the components?

[C]

Quarter sheets.

[B]

What are the components on the butternut squash pizza?

[C]

It's like or it's A acorn squash. It's like a thin layer of acorn squash, olive oil, some parmesan cheese, honey, and then red pepper flakes.

[B]

That sounds delightful.

[C]

It's so good. I love it. Little fontina cheese as well.

[B]

How about that?

[C]

Yeah. Real nice. Real beautiful. Love a mushroom pie. Yeah. Quarter sheets is unbelievable. I'm not a big fan of their bar pizza, but I do like their Detroit style pizza a lot.

[A]

Wags has never been my favorite.

[C]

Yeah, I'll go with you. I'll make a reservation when we leave.

[A]

It's my favorite restaurant in la. He's not. We've never gotten them out to us.

[B]

Good luck. I'll go with it. Do.

[C]

And their cakes are take.

[A]

No, I'm fine.

[C]

Has anyone ever. They have cakes there famously. Like their desserts are as equally as good as their pizza. Has anyone ever called cakes like the dessert pizza?

[A]

It is. I. You know what? They should.

[B]

I don't know if they have, but they think they should. Yeah, I think it's good.

[A]

It is.

[C]

They're very good.

[B]

Cuz you look at the form factor of a pie and you see your pizza pie and you're like, well, that's probably. That's the dessert pizza. But when you actually think about it, cake is closer in execution to a dessert pizza.

[C]

Yeah. Quarter sheets is so good. Just their plain cheese is unbelievable. It will fill you up quick. But it's good.

[A]

I love it. It's my favorite. And the owner's a great guy and his wife does all the. Does all the desserts. Aaron, what a taste. I think you may have met Aaron. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

They do that too. Husband and wife. Cutes.

[B]

I like. I just. This is the thing Mitch and I are on the same page about, which is that a cheese pizza is like the platonic ide of pizza. It's like if you get a really good cheese pizza, that's all you need. It's. It's like a. It's like a grilled cheese sandwich almost. It's like the best version of it is just pure, which is kind of

[A]

what a toasty is. Why a toasty can have meat in it, but it is mostly like a cheese and tomato on bread. Toasted. It's great.

[C]

And I. What? Like I've kind of fell off, but I really liked tomato pie, which is from Syracuse.

[B]

Oh yeah.

[C]

That's right down the street from me, which I love.

[A]

Tomato pie is a great.

[B]

I feel like solid.

[A]

I was saying this the other day because. Because people. Because who was I talking to about this? But they were like, I like tomato pie. Do people not like tomato pie? And I'm like, no. Tomato pie has just been around for a while now. And I think it was like such a writer's room thing. I feel like so many people would, at the end of the day, be like, order five pizzas from tomato pie or something. And people just got used to it, right? Like, here's this fixation on writers room food. I'm just saying, because I think that comedy people get spoiled by this food. And then they're like, it's not.

[B]

We're talking about the specific circles you, you, you operate it in.

[A]

I'm saying, you too. You've got. I'm sure you've gotten tomato pie.

[B]

I'm not. I'm not. I don't have tomato pie fatigue. I love tomato pie.

[A]

I'm just. I'm just saying it's. It happened that, like, it was a go to. You have to admit that it was.

[C]

I mean, I got that big Mama's and Papa's pizza, like, at every apple sister show, you got one. Because we're like, gotta feed the crew.

[A]

And then I would argue, big Mamas and Papa's Pizza. Pizza is not like great pizza. Tomato pie is better than that.

[C]

It is a showpiece, though. And I love, love a splash food item.

[B]

We had a good time with Big Mamas and Big Papas when we did it on the podcast.

[C]

We did. Yeah.

[A]

Was Zach Cherry.

[B]

Zach Cherry, Yeah.

[A]

And the big one. We used to get the big one. We would get the big one at like a birthday boys party or something.

[C]

Funny. I love it.

[A]

It's great.

[C]

And then the last one I'll mention is Desanos.

[A]

Desanos. Love Desanos.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I go there for my birthday a lot every year.

[B]

Usually what I like about Desano's. And yes, I do go there for Mitch's birthday. I'm part of that gigantic.

[C]

Oh, when is it? I'll be there.

[B]

I'm sure you'll be welcome.

[A]

October 6th.

[B]

There is always. It's just one of those things where you're just like, man, Mitch knows a lot of people. I don't know this many. I was just like, I was at a wedding that had, like, fun, you

[A]

know, all those people.

[B]

I know. But I'm just like, I would not imagine a social situation where I'm like, like, oh, yeah, I'll invite all. Invite 50 people and they'll all show up. You know what I mean? It was just another wedding with like five. With like 500 guests.

[C]

You're a good guy. We showed up guys.

[B]

I guarantee if you threw a party and you invited a hundred people, I bet all 100 people would go, why? Because it's so rare party. Everyone would be like, you gotta go to Weger's party.

[C]

I'd be like, I have to go.

[B]

I'd have to go.

[A]

I think there'd be a good turnout at your funeral. I think a lot of people would come.

[C]

That'll be 19 years and 364 days of this podcast. Die right then everybody show up.

[B]

Anyway, we do go there. And I like what I like about it as a parlor. I love a pizza parlor. You, even though you're ordering the counter, it's like it's got all this space to dine in. You're eating pies, you're going to a different table, you're talking to the people there, you're getting a different conversations. Bug Main is hosting a seminar about the movie that from that was made by, you know, the someone's son and like how it's bad. Like it's just like, like great. I'll just watch what. I'll let him cook a little bit. Then I'm going to go over here and like, oh, it's Joe Saunders. Hey, Joe, haven't seen you in a while. How are the. How's the family?

[A]

There you go.

[C]

I love this make believe party. President Barack Obama. What are you doing here with Kermit the Frog? Walter coming out my dreams.

[B]

Love Walter to be there.

[A]

I Ferguson has responded. He sent the birthday boys.

[C]

I remember that.

[B]

Hot doggin. Yeah, I remember that. Show. Show, great show.

[A]

And Dave is saying 12208 was when hot Dogging premiered, which means that then it must. The New York City sketch fest must have been 08 instead of 07.

[C]

And then I watched their tape and I was like, these boys got something.

[A]

Did you think we owe you for being there? That was huge for us.

[B]

Did you think they were a Christian sketch group? A lot of people thought that because they did all clean comedy and they were wholesome boys. So he's like, oh, these are, these are. This is like a bunch of, of Mormons or something.

[A]

That was one of them. I'm not even lying. Oh, really?

[C]

That's so funny. No, I didn't. It didn't occur to me. But were you?

[A]

No, we were not.

[B]

We were.

[A]

We never. We. There was a sketch where the secret is everyone thought we were because we did the pie sketch. And then there was a sketch where I am Dave Ferguson's Dad. And he got stood up to prom. And then I take him to prom. At the end of the sketch, I suck his dick.

[B]

Well, that's. That was years later. There was a gigantic gap between those two sketches.

[A]

Yeah, but that was a thing that. That changed people's mind.

[B]

That changed people's perception. I think also before that, your ropes and underwear. Yeah, that's where you came out naked. But oops, we were covering ourselves. Some leaves were involved. There was a censored bar.

[A]

Very much. It was. It was. Yeah, we were covering ourselves.

[B]

But. But I'm just saying, like, before that. Yeah, I. I do remember, like, all this stuff was like. It's like Tim Calpacus got the wrong briefcase. And that was the premise for a sketch. It was like, the stuff that would be like, this could.

[A]

That.

[B]

You know what I mean? In a different.

[A]

It's funny you said that, because briefcase switcheroo is what Ferguson just sent.

[B]

Shut up.

[A]

And that is from. That's. That is 4807. So that's why I think next year is 20 years. 4807. So that's when we first started as.

[C]

Let's bring it back. Let's go to that poster from Sketch Fest and call up everybody who'll show up.

[A]

Everyone's. Half of them are dead.

[B]

I know a lot of them have done great.

[A]

A lot of them are still in comedy.

[C]

Still around. Absolutely.

[B]

Emma Emelia. We're talking pizza. I know we've talked about this at length with both of you, and we've covered pizza on recent episodes and upcoming episodes. It's a recurring topic for us here on the Doughboys podcast. A podcast some people think is a pizza podcast, but we're larger than that. No, no, we're a Christian podcast. We're a Christian podcast. Do you have meals? Your pizza preferences. You're from New Jersey, which a lot of people say is the best. Okay, technically, you're technically from New York. New York.

[A]

New Jersey area made a mistake. But now I know.

[B]

Now I'll start correcting.

[C]

Because everybody says that I'm from New

[B]

Jersey, so I'll just correct.

[C]

I'm technically from New York.

[B]

You're technically from New York. You're. You're closer to Jersey than, like, New York City. Correct. Am I wrong about that? Right on the board. Right on the border. Right on the state border.

[C]

New York.

[A]

Do you know, like, Rockland County?

[B]

Do you know, like, Westchester?

[A]

Rockland County?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Do you know Nyack?

[C]

Yeah. A lot. A lot of people moved up there from Brooklyn recently. So, yeah.

[B]

I'm from Pearl river, which is a town right next to. Okay, so you're there like New York. New York, New Jersey. These, the tri state area. The best pizza of the country. A lot of people say, what are your preferences? What do you like? Just a good old classic pizza pie. Very good anima. How about you?

[C]

That's what they call it in New York.

[B]

I guess I gotta go with a

[C]

good old classic pizza pie. Dang it. Walked right into it. Oh, I forgot one. Hail Mary. Hail Mary and Atwater.

[B]

Hail Mary. Okay.

[C]

Sourdough.

[A]

Oh, right, Yeah. I like secret pizza, if you haven't tried that yet.

[C]

Oh, yeah, that's Jersey style pizza. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, by the way, DJ Gallagher loves it here.

[A]

Here's, here's. I, I. Back in my day when they said let them cook, it usually meant when I was going to bake a honey baked ham,

[C]

which I love so much. This is what the problem is. It's like right now my brain is like, don't, don't try to jump on this. Because that's all you'll think, but it's all I'll think about.

[A]

Amelia texted me, let him cook and used to meet. And that was one. Let them cook was one of the terms and. But there was another one that I can't remember that didn't have to. That didn't have to do with him.

[C]

Give me some lingo. Let's do it. What's the lingo?

[A]

Riz.

[B]

Riz is. Is

[C]

Riz. Riz was the sound of the honey baked dam coming straight out of the oven.

[A]

No cap. Google. No cap I think was one of the ones I wrote down.

[B]

Yeah, you can perhaps reverse engineer.

[C]

Come on, you got it. You got it.

[B]

Skibidy. G. What's that?

[C]

That's a dump.

[B]

Dump truck. A guillot.

[C]

Yeah. Means get a baby dumper.

[B]

Yeah. G. Yeah. G Y A T T. Oh, it's an acronym.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

G Y A T. T got your God.

[C]

It's like go.

[B]

It's like God damn your ass. Oh, something like. I don't remember that. Got it. But something like that. Your ass thick.

[C]

Godamn your ass. So skibidy is out. I'll tell you from the 11 year old my house, she's like, Skibid's out. 67 is out. Out. Scuba is the new thing.

[B]

Scuba is the new thing.

[C]

Scuba.

[B]

Well, I mean like your take on that.

[C]

Yeah, Scuba.

[B]

Back in my day, I do have a 6. 7 1. Back in my day, 6, 7 was the number of hours I peaked by a Honey baked ham in the oven.

[A]

There we go. I like it.

[C]

I love it.

[A]

He cooked honey baked ham for six to seven hours.

[B]

Slow and low.

[C]

This is great. I feel like we really accomplished something. Fry month and then this guy.

[A]

Pride month is gonna be good.

[B]

Pride month is gonna be good. Wait, so. So mayonnaise number one or mayonnaise stuff? I like, I've. I've had you have like a great, like house made mayo or homemade mayo.

[A]

It's like, it's like.

[B]

This is dynamite. This is all you need. You know, we, we talk in ranch. We talking fry sauce. Like, like, like the, the. The Utah kind of Thousand islands.

[C]

Yeah, the orange. That one. That's good. Or just like a. Like a horseradish ketchup.

[B]

Horseradish ketchup is great. Bling.

[C]

Bling.

[B]

That's the. That's like one occasion when you get that little bit of. Because I'm a bit of a heat seeker and I particular. And wasabi sort of, sort of burned.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

When I get that, that's when I will take the house ketchup over the Heinz. When I get like a horseradish ketchup. A little pizzazz, I gotta say.

[A]

This secret pizza's in Lincoln Heights.

[B]

Wow. How about that?

[A]

And this is a neighborhood in la. And I don't know if it was

[B]

a neighborhood in la.

[A]

It was named after Abraham Lincoln because he was so tall.

[B]

He was mostly hat.

[A]

We'll be right back. Diarrhea break week wigs. We're back.

[B]

We're back.

[A]

Welcome back to what I found the original voice now.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

This is from June 6th, 2026.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So over a month.

[C]

Whoa. Six, six, two, six six, six, two, six.

[B]

Pretty cool.

[A]

Should I just play it?

[B]

Yeah, play it.

[A]

Okay. Because we can see the origin of the story. In my day, glazing was only when you. When you put in my day, if you glazed something, it would be a honey baked ham. In my day, 67 was the average male life expectancy. Hold on. In my day, watching a Tik Tock was sitting in front of the grandfather clock. So there was no honey bag.

[C]

T. Now the Tik Tok would be watching the ticko down.

[B]

Were you filling your bathtub? What was going on there?

[A]

I was in New York City.

[B]

Oh, you're just. Okay, you're just outside.

[A]

I was on Prospect Park West.

[B]

And then there was one underground in the subway.

[A]

I might have been on the subway. That's a good point.

[B]

Might have been that.

[A]

Yeah, I might have been on the subway.

[C]

All by yourself.

[A]

And then the Last one that I didn't play was at the hotel when I got home. Home. And it was. In my day, Obsession was a clone by Calvin Klein, which I thought was funny because it's showing that he's not even really. That he's not that old. That was.

[C]

That was the Obsession was how I feel every day when looking at my honeymoon.

[A]

And Amelia sent me a lot more.

[C]

I feel like you guys are going to be sent T shirts with this.

[B]

This is. Yeah, this dude. This has legs.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Little Little CAESARS. Founded in 1959 in Garden City, Michigan by Mike and Marion Ilitch the Fed. They were set up founders Mike and Marion on a. On a blind date by Mike father. Which is a little weird, but. Oh, weird dad setting you up on a blind date with a woman.

[C]

Real hottie.

[B]

I know. Maran for her part later in life said I consider little Caesars my eighth child. So, you know.

[C]

Got seven.

[B]

Got. Got. Yeah. Anyway. Has 5,400 locations in 30 countries. It is the third largest pizza chain in the US behind Domino's and Pizza Hut. And we last Talked about it LA Mitch with Jono Wilson and Josh Gondelman. 2025 with Gondelman. We're talking about another Marvel tie in pizza. The Fantastic four in one pizza.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Which you. Which you and I recall. And I think we were a little underwhelmed by that particular lto but we overall gave it good fork scores. Three forks, three tines, pretty much all around. Today we are talking about the weberoni pizza which is a team up with Sony Pictures. Spider Man. Brand new day. Introducing a basically a thing that has a. I'll just read this copy. Inspired by Spider Man's iconic web slinging superpowers, this limited time promotion includes a large round weberoni pizza topped with mozzarella cheese, a web of shredded pepperoni and toasted two cheese blend for just $8.99. You can also web any existing pizza which we chose not to do. We just got the default Weberoni.

[A]

You.

[B]

So you don't eat meat. So you opted out of the Weberoni. But you, you eat with your eyes first. You were looking at that thing. What. What did you think of this conceptual. Because it's meant to evoke a spider web.

[C]

Yeah. I mean I saw the pictures. I was like that's beautiful.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Like. And I felt like I. I was like, how is A. The 16 year old working there gonna figure this out? Like, is there a machine that just like clunks it down?

[B]

Right.

[C]

Like how does it get on there because it's julianned like pepperoni, basically.

[B]

And it was like one whole. It was like, it looked like one whole piece. Like, it was like, oh, they have like this web template they're just kind of putting on from this huge, you know, sheet of pepperoni. But it's not that. It's just a bunch of individual strips and they're just arranged by someone who's, you know, doing food prep for a photo shoot. And that's why it looks so nice in the, the photography. But when you actually get it in practice, it just looks like a bunch of little pepperoni strips kind of randomly arrayed.

[C]

Yeah, it was clumped.

[B]

It was, it was very clumpy.

[A]

And not the good clump. We're not talking the good clumps.

[B]

No, we're not talking the good clumps.

[C]

Also, I have a question for. Because you guys ate it, like, was it. Does the pepperoni cook as nicely when it's a straw strip? Like, don't you need the rooney like the round?

[B]

Ron, I think that I kind of liked it. I did kind of like it. But I, but I do think the form factor made it underperform relative to a just a default pepperoni pizza. And I wanted it to be. I at least appreciate that they had, they put some effort into having this. Have not just a theming, but a Spider Man. Appropriate theme. But I just kind of felt like it didn't evoke a web. You know what I mean? And, and then, and then from a, from a taste standpoint. Yeah, the texture was just a little bit different. Different. I don't know. What did you think?

[A]

I mean, I don't know how much of a web I want in reality anyways. I guess what came out like how

[C]

Spider man, it's like blotches of pepperoni everywhere.

[B]

You're pretty awesome.

[A]

I mean, we were trying to give it to you.

[C]

Decorate your own pizza.

[A]

You want thick meat shooting out of his wrist.

[B]

That'd be awesome. I mean, sure, they could pull it off.

[C]

Oh, they are meat webs. When you just said that, meat webs.

[A]

I mean like that's, that's. I didn't. I, I. This shredded look, we were saying that there, there's like there was, there, there was a little bit of effort put into it, which we were saying for now, for the ltos wise, there's not a lot of effort put into any of these anymore. So I was like, there's a little bit of effort here. I, it's, it's, it's fine. It's fine. It was fine. And you got the pepperoni taste. I do think it was more. Even though, like, like you're. You're getting pepperoni on almost every bite. Right. Of the. Of the pizza.

[B]

No, you were. It did have it. It was not skimping on the pep.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I. I will say I give it credit for that. At some point, I thought. I thought it was fine. And I think of why as, like, I was a kid and I was excited for Spider Man. It also comes in a Spider man box, which isn't nothing. So I think I'd be kind of like, hey, this is cool. This is cool thingy.

[C]

So when you open it, Tom Holland goes, hey, see my movie. It's great. Actually.

[B]

They should do that.

[A]

They should do that. They used to try stuff like that

[C]

anymore.

[A]

Maybe he's just putting batteries near food or whatever. I feel like that maybe was a part of the issue.

[B]

I don't know, man. They have greeting cards that open up and like, play a song or something like that. You can do that on a pizza box.

[C]

A little batteries, like a little flat battery.

[A]

Kids would like it. They would love it. The kids would like it.

[B]

In fact, I don't think they'd stop opening and closing that box. They wouldn't want to throw it away.

[A]

That's true. This is actually maybe an issue.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Hank, close the box. The Weberon's getting cold.

[B]

We also got a veggie deep dish. This was a Detroit style deep dish pizza. Green peppers, onions, mushrooms, and black olives. Mitch, you had a take on this pizza, which was the mushrooms are pretty mushroomy.

[A]

The mushroom. I don't think I need like a full veggie pizza from. From Little Caesars. Like, it's not like the thing that I care about as much from Little Ca. Like, I think Little Caesar does a lot of things great and they do a good job with a of lot of it. It's. I'm just saying that going in, I like little you and I'm. We're. We're. We're. We're Little Caesar's fans.

[B]

And honestly, I said the working class.

[A]

I honestly think that it's that sort of thing of like, if you're ranking fast food pizza chains, you Domino's is different from pizza. But I like Domino's. And Domino's is probably my number one pizza chain chain pizza. Right.

[B]

It depends on if you include Costco. If you do, then I. Then I love Costco's. Really, really good value play. But I. But Domino's is up there. Domino certainly won the slices, right, our pizza tournament, wouldn't you say?

[A]

Little Caesars is up there too, then

[B]

Little Caesar's up there.

[A]

Pizza Hut.

[B]

It's beating Pizza Hut. I, I'd rather have it than Papa John's.

[A]

I'd rather have it than Papa John's too, for sure.

[C]

I like, I like Little Caesars better than Domino's. Domino's make gives me the same thing Subway does. It makes my face, like, feel, like, tingly.

[A]

So weird.

[C]

I don't know if it's a wheat they use or what, but I'm like,

[A]

I could see that.

[C]

Yeah, Little Caesars is all right.

[B]

I like Little Caesars.

[A]

I like, I like, I like Little Caesars. And then also so, But I'm just saying, I think that the veggies, they do well. There is, like, having, like, peppers and onions and olives on the pizza. It's great. The mushrooms were just like, you don't need to put mushrooms on the veggie pizza. They just kind of look slimy. And there's a reason that they don't put fresh tomato on the pizza there. Because, no, they don't use that in the restaurant. You know what I mean? Like, there's, there's no reason for it

[B]

for, for an execution standpoint. I do like their deep dish. I do like their Detroit style. And you were advocating for that, and I, I think that was the right call.

[A]

I've said on the podcast.

[B]

These, these toppings, I don't think were

[A]

particularly too exciting the, the back in the day. Well, we wanted to get, we wanted to get, we had the Weberoni, and we didn't want to get two pizzas. We did three pizzas.

[B]

We did three pizzAS.

[A]

Little Caesar himself recommends.

[B]

We got a cheese. So we were like, let's get some, some veggie friendly topping combo. But, but, but, Kimmy, like, I, I, I'm curious. You, you agree with us on cheese pizza. How often do you get, like, a veggie pizza, like, this style of pizza?

[C]

Never.

[B]

Never. Okay.

[C]

Never. Yeah.

[A]

So you would rather have had a cheese of that? Of that?

[C]

Yeah, But I, I always appreciate, like, just trying the veggies, you know, because it's like, I'm being healthy.

[A]

I mean, it was worth a shot. But didn't it seem like the veggies made it less baked? It felt like it was, like, undercooked.

[C]

The cheese was not fully melted on my slice. But, but the, and the, the mushrooms are like those canned mushrooms that you get and, like, but they were thick yeah. And that they looked a little spongy inside, but I thought the peppers were okay.

[B]

Peppers are all right.

[A]

Peppers are okay. The peppers and onions and the olives I thought were. Were good. I remember the late, great Harris widows. I was, I was watching TV with him and he said he. And the, the Little Caesar's deep dish commercial came out. He's like, that looks good as hell. I'm going to get it. And then the next time I was over with us, he had it. And he's like, it was good as hell. And I had it. And I was like, it is good as hell. And the, the, the deep dish, the. That Detroit style pizza from Little Caesars that kept it on the menu is, is good. I think it's a good. I think it's a good slice of pizza.

[B]

I thought, I assumed you were going to bring up Harris's observation that it's fun that the Little Caesars guy had. Has chest hair.

[A]

No, he didn't. He didn't think it was funny. He thought it was gross that he had chest hair. I think his tweet was that. Why does. I think he's saying, like, why does he have chest hair? Which it was a good point.

[B]

I kind of like.

[A]

You like it. Well, Harris, can't argue with you. I don't know what to say.

[B]

I do like that he says, pizza, pizza. That's really fun.

[C]

Oh, it's great.

[B]

What a thing to say.

[A]

He's a fun little guy.

[C]

Mitch right back, he's getting Little Caesars. And I was like, pizza, pizza, baby. Excited. I've never had the Detroit style before, and I must say that, like, it's a trendy pizza. I like it.

[A]

It's good. It's good. The vegetables, I think did a disservice to it because I actually think the cheese is, is better.

[B]

Yeah. I just wouldn't get a veggie pizza from this. I, I again, we're trying things because we're evaluating it.

[A]

We're not ordering the way we're reviewers.

[B]

But I, but I would not get a veggie pizza and I would not recommend for anyone to get a veggie pizza from Good. And we Little Caesars it is. Oh, it also speaking to Detroit style. This chain is from Detroit. I mean, it's like it's from the Detroit suburbs. So it at least authenticity about it.

[C]

Like this Detroit style.

[B]

I think they've had this, this for a while. This is, this is established.

[A]

I'd say, like, probably getting close to like 13, 14 years at this point. It's been around for. For a minute. But the people who own Little C's. Well, this is tough because the last time I said that, they were like some of the only good corp. Like billionaires or whatever or like. Right. Like as far as like corporate execs go.

[B]

It's one of those things.

[A]

But then I think people like, oh, really? They did this bad stuff themselves.

[C]

$50 million.

[A]

I mean, that is. That is kind of what it is. But like, right, there was. There was some stuff about how they were decent and then someone, I think, rebuttal and said that they did some bad stuff.

[B]

There's like the. You'll always. It's the. I. I agree. You're getting all these guys on a curve relative to each other. It seems like.

[A]

Is it a Rosa Parks thing with the owner?

[B]

There was. Yes, that. Yes. Mike Ilich. No, it was. This was a good thing. Mike Ilitch paid Rosa Parks a rent for most of her life after she. So like, so like, was that. That was like a so benevolent sort of thing. That was also quietly done. It was. It came out like after her death or his death. But also then people are like, oh, yeah, well, they're slum lords or they're.

[A]

They.

[B]

Their company doesn't pay well or whatever. I. I get it. I understand this. It's just like relative to someone like Jimmy John Leot, it's like they seem more benign, but I understand all these people are beyond bad. They're. Everyone's bad. Is that okay? Are you.

[A]

Everyone is bad.

[B]

Everyone is bad.

[C]

Thank you for saying.

[A]

I said this on the pod before, but my great grandpa had to go to the back of the bus because of Rosa Park. So I was pretty. I was like, oh, my God. So I was like, pretty.

[C]

And I paid your rent for years.

[A]

Yeah, Kimmy paid my rent.

[C]

Am I that everyone's bad?

[A]

My grandpa did not. And my grandpa didn't. My great grandpa. I had to push it even further back to make the joke. Now I got self conscious about the joke. I just made a joke. It was fine.

[B]

I read my great, great grandpa's obituary in the writer's room at work. Cause he, as I mentioned before on the podcast, he committed suicide by train in front of a crowd of onlookers. Yeah, people were kind of weirded out. Wow. Isn't that wild?

[C]

That is wild.

[A]

Wait, you. I. You've. You've read this to me before?

[B]

Yeah, I read this to you.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, it's good.

[C]

It's good.

[B]

It was in the newspaper.

[A]

So.

[C]

Sounds like the start of a movie.

[A]

One of the good things that they. I mean, that is a pretty damn good. As far as corporate presidents or whatever, people who own companies.

[B]

Yeah, we. Yeah, we don't need to dwell on it. But.

[A]

Yes, but I'm saying, like, that is. That is something. Something that's. I've never heard of anything even close to that from anyone else that we. That we talk about on the podcast.

[B]

So I also read that they pulled out of Russia in 2022 because of the war in Ukraine.

[C]

Little Caesar said.

[B]

Yeah, Little Caesar.

[C]

You can taste it.

[B]

Russian people eat fast food. I don't know. They're not all in support of the war.

[A]

All right, well, this is. This is what's complicated about. About it. What do you want from us? What do you want from us, too? We're bad, too. We're bad guys, too.

[B]

Yeah, we're bad. You want to hear about my many sins?

[C]

I'm great. So. Suckers.

[B]

We also got the cheese stuffed pretzel crust, which I like. I think we mostly ordered for the novelty of it. This is a large buttery. Oh, read the copy. Large buttery flavored soft pretzel stuffed crust pizza with cheddar cheese sauce and her four cheese blend. Now, what I did I not know I understood. I both. But I thought what we were choosing between was cheese sauce for the stuffed crust versus marinara sauce for the stuffed crust. Apparently, I was actually. We were actually choosing between whether or not the pizza itself was going to have marinara sauce or cheese sauce. And so this had a cheese. Oh, not a dipping sauce. Yeah, so this had like a cheese sauce. The horror in your face as the. As its basis. Like nacho cheese. Yeah, it was like cheese. It was cheese on top of cheese. When I went in there, and I was very confused about. I was looking at.

[C]

So now it makes a lot more sense.

[B]

I. I thought it was kind of gross, but kind of good. You know that feeling. I was like, this is. Oh, this is like, kind of putrid. But then I had a few more bites. I was like, I can't stop eating it, though. And I usually don't like stuff crust so much, but the pretzel crust was good.

[A]

It's nacho cheese covered in mozzarella cheese and then a stuffed crust mozzarella. It's insane from a cheese standpoint.

[B]

It's unka. But I also kind of enjoyed it because it was. I don't know. It's cheese and pretzels, which is a good combo. I don't know.

[C]

It was I mean, listen, it was like, this is a perfect, like, fun, hanging out pizza. Because it feels like we're at a baseball field or something. Like, it's like stadium food to me. Very much felt like. And I was like, I was ready to hate on it. And I was like, if I went out to dinner and got this, I'd be pissed. But because we were hanging out and it felt like a vibe.

[A]

It was good vibe pizza. It was vibe pizza. It was vibe pizza. Yeah.

[B]

I'll have a slice of this. I maybe won't have a second slice, but I'm glad I enjoyed this slice.

[C]

Yeah. I thought the pretzel was nice. And I was.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Looking at the orange underneath the white cheese and confused.

[B]

That was unnerving. Honestly. It just looks strange.

[A]

Hey, Russia. It was delicious. Sorry, Russia. Sorry, old lady in Russia village. She was delicious.

[C]

Monster.

[B]

The cookie dough brownie with Twix was our dessert course. This is a brownie topped with cookie dough frosting and Twix cookie bar pieces. Kimmy, you were, for a time, confused about what we were eating. It felt like

[C]

I was like, is it. Are we eating marzipan?

[B]

It is not really, like, identifiable.

[C]

Is it malt?

[B]

Right. But it was.

[A]

It is. It's weird. It's very weird.

[B]

It's also very science.

[A]

And guess what?

[B]

Very chemically.

[A]

And guess what?

[C]

I couldn't get the Twix.

[A]

I kind of like it.

[B]

I think it was a little. It was a little much for me. I think it was just like. And I agree, the Twix could have been more forward. Like, I. Like, I hear Twix cookie bar pieces. We've had a similar version of this dessert from Little Caesars that has M and M's. And that one works a little bit better because it's just like, oh, I'm just eating a little M and M pieces here. I think the fragmented Twix, it just kind of got lost in the shuffle. Know. I don't know.

[C]

Did you think you were.

[B]

There was enough Twix there. I wanted more Twix.

[A]

There wasn't enough Twix. It wasn't enough texture, but it's still pretty tasty.

[B]

It wasn't bad.

[A]

Sorry, Mr. Putin. Sorry.

[C]

I'm putting that in my belly. Stupid. That was good.

[A]

That was really good.

[C]

But, yeah, I. I felt like the cookie dough was, like, the stuff that you get in, like, a Ben and Jerry's or like a cookie dough ice cream, which is always, always, like, better in ice cream because it's surrounded by vanilla ice cream.

[B]

Right.

[C]

But eating it on its own, you gotta have fresh cookie dough.

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

Don't put it on a brownie because you're like, am I eating undercooked, like Little Caesars dessert?

[A]

That's fair.

[B]

A little unnerving.

[A]

Yeah, that's.

[C]

Yeah, it did feel like a chemical. It felt bleachy. But not that it wasn't bleach.

[B]

It wasn't specifically bleach, but I know what you mean. It was just like you're kind of trying to identify some cause. Compound flavor. Yeah.

[C]

Cleaning product.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This guy knows this bleach. This guy knows what bleach tastes like.

[C]

Definitely not bleach, Kimmy. The bleach I've had is sweet.

[A]

He does those drinking videos where he doesn't know what the drinks are and he's like, oh, that's bleach 100.

[C]

Wait, what are these videos when you.

[A]

Yo, do you not, you know, you know them?

[B]

Oh, it's like a blind test.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Where you. You're blindfolded and then you sip out of a straw.

[A]

Different drinks and it's a chat with challenge.

[B]

Some people try to guess different.

[C]

Like, like, have you guys done that with chain restaurants?

[A]

We're gonna do one or we just have done one. We just did one.

[B]

Did we?

[A]

On our live show.

[B]

Okay. Wow.

[C]

Oh, that's fun. So you like, you close your eyes, you're like, what am I eating? And then you have to guess which restaurant it's from.

[A]

Yeah, it's fun.

[C]

That's great.

[A]

It's fun as hell.

[C]

That is Fun as hell.

[A]

4, 4 20. 2007 was the first. That was the first birthday boy sketch.

[B]

How about that? On 4:20. On 4:20.

[C]

And also Harris Valentine's Day, cuz we're sweeties. That's.

[A]

That's.

[C]

And you guys. 420, cuz you cuz we're Christian Sketch group.

[A]

Harris's birthday, Shields's birthday, 420.

[B]

Was it a 420 show? Do you know?

[A]

Was it? Maybe. Maybe it was weed themed. I mean, I'm sure there was stuff going.

[B]

Show sketch, performance. That's wild.

[A]

Maybe it was not too shabby on 420. That's probably what it was.

[B]

Not too shabby for. For people who are don't have context for the UCW LA sketch scene back in the. The 20, the 2000 and tens and the OTS. It was a. It was basically an open mic for sketch where a lot of talented people who are now like everywhere came up originally speaking. Happy birthday to Dano Happy birthday, Dano.

[A]

I want to give Dano happy birthday. It's going to be past it when it comes out, but still, happy birthday.

[B]

He'll appreciate it. He's a sweetie. Okay, we got these. Mountain Dew, mango rush, which Mitch and I have our big tall boys of. Of right here.

[C]

Mine outside. Sorry.

[B]

I mean, I barely had any of this. Not going to have much more. It is really a. I dare I say, a potent mix. It is quite it. It is really like so that the flavor is mango sweet heat. And, you know, I'm a bit of a heat seeker, but I'm not getting much heat. I don't think any of us were right. It's supposed to be like kind of a tahin quality. We're not really getting it.

[A]

Yeah. By the way, it says. It says. It shows a tent and it says pizza. Pizza. Is he saying that from inside the tent?

[B]

What's he doing?

[A]

So is he getting it on inside?

[C]

He's putting his slogan on his tent, man.

[A]

Oh, that's. Oh, no, he's outside the tent. There he is. There he is. I thought. I thought it was coming from inside

[C]

the tent, but he's there because it looks like a slice of pizza.

[A]

It does look like a slice of pizza. You see it there? Wow.

[B]

You thought he was.

[C]

See the fact this is contains 0% juice.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Why do they have to announce that?

[B]

I just want to clarify. You thought the Little Caesar's mask off was being portrayed having sex in a tent and exclaiming, pizza, Pizza.

[A]

I thought that he was inside the tent and saying, pizza, Pizza. I was like, what's going on in there?

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And then. So that is a question. That's. I think that is a fine question to ask.

[B]

Right. Why is he saying he up to.

[A]

What's he up to in there? But he's. I wasn't looking. My finger was covering. He's outside the tent and he's. And he's just happy. And his tent is branded Pizza. Pizza. Kimmy was right.

[B]

Maybe there's another guy in there. His wife

[A]

saying pizza.

[B]

She's saying, pizza. Pizza. She's never felt such intense satisfaction.

[A]

He seems fine or happy.

[B]

He's okay with it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, like wood fire pizza.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I kind of. The can actually is confusing me more. It's like a mango. There's like a man. It's like a mango waterfall thing going on. It has a camp vibe.

[C]

LC Is that the name of the, the. What is the couple's name again?

[B]

I think Elsie's.

[C]

Little Caesars. Right?

[B]

Yeah. Little Caesars

[C]

and Wife thing.

[B]

That would be a cute tribute.

[C]

Little. See, I think it's Little Caesar. That makes more sense. Unless those were also their initials. Right?

[A]

The can.

[B]

The can.

[A]

The can make is actually kind of more confusing, Honest.

[B]

I agree. There's just so much going on here.

[A]

There's a lot going on. Rushed. There's a river. The bottom line is I kind of liked it. I tasted no heat at all. That's my, that's, that's. You guys didn't like.

[B]

This is just. I think this is way too sweet for my palette. And it tastes really syrupy, too. That's, Yeah. I, I, I can't handle this face.

[C]

Nick.

[A]

I gotta say, I gotta say this, this is a good mixer.

[B]

Oh, that's a good.

[A]

This is a good mixer.

[B]

If you mix this up, I think this could work. Yeah.

[C]

I wish I had more carbonation, personally.

[B]

Yeah, it, you know, absolutely. That might help actually evoke the, the heat. Maybe they're going for even just a little bit more effort. Effervescence. But also, we will have, we will say we had to get this from a different Little Caesars because they were sold out of the Mountain Dew Bango Rush, a An exclusive Little Caesar's flavor. I did not disclose that this is, this is exclusive to this particular chain restaurant, and we've not reviewed it on the podcast previously, but we had to go to a different location just for the drinks.

[A]

I came and I pulled out a Coke Zero and I was like, oh, did we get the Mountain Dew? And then Amelia seemed scared, and so

[B]

that I was like, we got some on the way from a different place. Don't worry.

[A]

It seems like you did that because I would be. You thought I would come and be mad?

[B]

No, I just anticipated you asking for it, so I was like, I'm going

[C]

to be prepared if you need help. Wait, where did you get this extra Mountain Dew from? Was it from Lincoln Heights?

[B]

From the Los Feliz location in Vermont. They had, I guess they had them available.

[C]

Available, but the Echo park location did not. Wow. Sold out. That's wild. I, I, I didn't mind it.

[B]

Go on. What are you looking at?

[A]

Back in my day, busing is what happened to the tables after we ate our honey baked ham. These, these are. What am. I already did the. Let them cook one. Right? Back in my day, sleigh is what we did to hogs to make the honey baked ham.

[B]

I mean, like, look, meat's got to come from somewhere.

[A]

Back in my day, he ate. Is what we said after we had honey baked ham. Pretty good.

[C]

Thanks.

[A]

Pretty good. You know, I've always been a big sleep man. I think everyone knows that about me. And, you know, a good night's rest sets you up for a great day. And that's why I'm so happy with my Helix mattress. My moonlight luxe, which I've had now for a good seven or so years. Six. Seven years. Somewhere around there. I've had this mattress for a while and I still love it. My moonlight luxe. I took the Helix sleep quiz. It matched me with this mattress. It feels like I'm sleeping on a cloud. I love it. My mom loves it. When she comes in and stays, I sleep on the couch. Don't worry. But my mom loves it. Wally and Irma, my cats love it. It's a great mattress. The best mattress I've ever had. And helix has over 20 mattress models, so you can find the perfect model for you. That's right. Helix delivers your mattress right to your door. With free shipping in the US and 120 night sleep trial and limited lifetime warranty.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

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[C]

Bye.

[A]

Hi, I'm Beck Bennett.

[C]

I thought I was Beck Bennett.

[A]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

It's Kyle Mooney.

[A]

Sorry about that. Exactly. No, all good. All good.

[C]

Thanks, buddy. Yeah.

[A]

And we host the show what's our podcast here on Headgum.

[B]

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I like that it's all in one place.

[C]

I know.

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I like that I don't have to go around, you know, to like different stores or something.

[C]

It's just all in my. Well, it's like, oh, do I need to go to like a Do I need another type of website to like, find the right pictures or to like another type of website to upload the.

[A]

Yeah, no, it's all in one place.

[C]

The video or the audio or like. No, I want it makes it easy. Make it easy on me, please.

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Yes. And you can do all those things. Photos, videos, changing fonts, you know, I mean, the designs are amazing. They're catering to all your different needs. They're SEO tools, which. I know what those are. And their custom domains.

[C]

Oh, let's come up with a domain right now. Let's see.

[B]

I wonder if it exists.

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[C]

Friends.

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[B]

We should get to our fork scores on Little Caesar. So, Kimmy, here's how this will work. We will each go around, give a closing argument, if you will, a summation of our thoughts on Little Caesar Caesars, and then end that by giving it a score from 0 to 5. Forks. Partial forks are welcome if you want to do tines. It's. It's up to you. But we will. We will have you begin because you are a guest. Your thoughts, your fork score.

[C]

Beauty and the beast of you be our guest. And we're Beast Lumiere me.

[A]

And we are Beast like. And I. I was Lefou in Raise the curtain.

[B]

Very cool.

[A]

I was. I was LeFou.

[C]

You were probably fantastic.

[A]

Josh Gad came and stole the beast from you. Oh, no, he was Lefou. And oh, wait, wasn't he in the live action.

[C]

Oh, live action one. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

I just figured since I did it, it raised the curtain I'd probably be cast in the. In the Giant Disney considered A callback, maybe a test.

[B]

I don't know. I will just say. When I found out later in life that the voice of Lumiere is Jerry Orbach, Rest in Peace of Law and Order fame, I was like, actors are amazing. How can he do that? How is he able to be Lumiere and then also be this gruff detective on this procedural? I can't do that.

[C]

He's a witch.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

God bless him.

[A]

Now you understand why.

[C]

Dun dun.

[B]

Isn't that one of the things where he's just like, you're the dad, Dirty Dancing. You're Lumiere and Beauty and the Beast, and then you're just a. You're. You're a staple of Law and order for, like, 20 years. Just, like, what more can you want in a career that's just like. That's just show business? What a.

[A]

What an arc.

[B]

God bless him.

[A]

Great arc. Yeah.

[C]

I mean, I did. When I ran out of college, I did a play with Sam Waterston of Law and Order. It was Long Day's Journey tonight. I was Kathleen the maid. You're not even gonna believe when I say this cast. It was Sam Waterston, James Waterston, Stunt John Slattery, and Elizabeth Franz. There was an amazing cast.

[B]

That's wild.

[C]

But, like, he was saying Sam Waterst and, like, you know, he would do these plays and stuff, because it's like, you. You're an actor lucky enough to have, like, a steady job. You can do kind of whatever the fuck you want, you know, because you have to. You'll lose your mind, you know?

[B]

That's so awesome.

[A]

So that's cool as hell.

[C]

Yeah, it was. It was pretty sweet. But, yeah, I would. I could totally see that, because he's like, I'll take a chance on Lumiere.

[B]

You know, nails his French accent.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

All right. Be our guest.

[C]

Okay. Thank you. I would say probably three and a half.

[B]

Three and a half.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Good score.

[A]

Three and a half forks.

[C]

Three and a half forks. Yes. Because I was supposed to do the argument first.

[B]

I know. You're doing great.

[C]

Great. Thanks. But I would say that I was surprised by the deep dish being so, like, I. I could see past the. The vegetables. The. I thought it was create given points for creativity on the spider web and then minus for the execution. And I thought the pretzel pizza was. It would be my new favorite stadium food if it was served at an Angel City game.

[B]

Oh, I love it.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I got to get into Angel City.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I've. I've gotten.

[C]

I got season tickets.

[B]

You oh my God, I'd love to go to a game.

[A]

Neil Campbell has season tickets too, I think.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, I think so. Nice.

[B]

Cuz I've just gotten into to proper football because via the World cup, which I have like, I fucking love. I was like, I'm having so much fun and, and I'm just like I gotta, I gotta get into these local LA teams. LAFC and Angel City.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean just, I can just take the Choo Choo over there.

[C]

You can, you can take the expo line right, right straight to the, and right near the Lucas Museum. Oh my God, I'm so excited.

[B]

Don't get me started on the George Lucas Museum of Narrative Art coming very, very soon.

[C]

Going to be exquisite. They're gonna have beautiful art and then this outdoor thing on the roof and then Star wars nerd stuff.

[B]

And the D lines expanded. What a time to be in la.

[A]

Yeah. Just as Hollywood has vanished.

[B]

Yeah, I guess that's that. You know what? That's not a deal, Mitch.

[C]

I went to Disneyland and they, they had something that said like riding the D and I was like, I guess that's the saying.

[A]

Guess what? This guy's got that shirt.

[B]

I've got an official LA Metro ride the D T shirt to support public transit. That is official.

[A]

Write something.

[B]

What? Mitch, you're, you're a fork scorer.

[A]

H WS I love Little Caesars. I I, I For me it's a Jimmy's re adjustment adjusting ourself here. I She's cute as hell.

[B]

Good girl.

[C]

Oh,

[A]

I like a lot. If we had a, if we had a rate what we got today, like I would say it was, would be a little bit like I'd say this is a, the Weberoni pizza. I still thought it was good. So I almost am still like four forks because I thought it was good. The execution wasn't great execution. Three and a half forks. But I still like the taste of it. So I would go four forks. I want to give Little Caesars five forks because I just like it. And I think what they do, they do well, which is you go in and you walk in and there's a pizza ready to grab and you take it to go and it's serviceable. And, and, and I, I don't know. I believe in what they're doing over there. Wags. But H, this is hard. Five forks.

[B]

Five forks. Wow. Very.

[A]

Is that crazy mean?

[C]

Like what a journey.

[A]

I, I, I, I, I, I was genuinely. I didn't know what, I really didn't know where to land here. Because that. That pretzel pizza, like, isn't great pizza. But I did. Like you were saying. I. Like, if this was 20 years ago, I was at UCB and someone brought a bunch of those pizzas, I'd be. I'd be on cloud nine. I'd be having a blast. I would. I would love it. So. And it is kind of gross. And it is. It is. Is like, kind of. But it's a working man's pizza wise. It's got a lot going for it. I don't. I don't. I don't know. It's. And I genuinely think that deep dish is a good pizza. And we got like, the worst version of it today.

[B]

I don't think it's crazy because it's your truth and that's how you feel.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

So I think that's completely reasonable.

[C]

See the positivity.

[A]

He's. He can be. He can be.

[C]

All right.

[B]

What a sweetie Meals. Do we have the receipt or do we have, like. Because I'm curious what the. What the total bill of this was. We got three pizzas, we got a dessert, and we got three drinks. 4,383. I mean, in this day and age,

[C]

good price for three pizzas and a dessert.

[B]

Yeah. And we had enough to. We could have fed the whole team if the deist wanted to eat any of it, which they did not.

[C]

I had pizza.

[B]

I'mma had one slice of pizza. That's right.

[C]

What did you try?

[B]

I had the pepperoni one.

[C]

Cause I saw the pretzel one with the cheese sauce on it.

[B]

And not knowing what was going on, I was like, I don't know what that is. So I didn't pick it up.

[C]

Toxic Avenger cheese kind of looked really like oil to me when I was

[B]

looking at it just in the box. Now that I know it's cheese, it makes more sense. But it looks oily, so I grabbed the pepperoni one. Not fussy pizza. It was not visually. Yeah, you're not far off. It's not visually appealing. It looked gross. That's inarguable. But I think this is a thing we. We rarely. Or. Or I guess we probably undervalue here because, you know, this is our job. And we're using the. The Doughboys business credit card to purchase these things. So it's like, what. Whatever coming out of your Patreon dollars. So thank you for that. But the. But. But like, we rarely are, like, thinking of it in terms of a value proposition. And I think if you're feeding Your family. And with how fucking expensive food is, the quality you're getting from Little Caesars for the price point is, you know, very much in the pro column for this particular chain.

[C]

They had seven children. So.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[C]

Probably no.

[B]

So I, I do like that aspect. I like that the, the Weberon pizza if like, hey, my kid likes Spider man. And they, they're excited for this pizza. You know what this costs $8.99. That's not gonna, like, you know, not put me out of house and home. Like, this is fine. This can just be like a budget friendly dinner for a night. And I think that that has to be a thing that we're going to consider here. And I'm gonna say, back in my

[A]

day, he sounds like droopy now.

[B]

Four Forks was me and three of my friends enjoying our honey baked ham. But today, in our day and age, Four Forks is my score for Little Caesars. Wow.

[A]

So almost out of the Golden Plate Club. But close.

[B]

But close. It's almost there.

[A]

Back in my day, we didn't ride the D, we baked the H. We'll

[B]

be right, right back. Okay, we're back. Hey, that was our view of Little Caesars. It's time for a segment. I've got a food related survey. Mitch and Kimmy will compete to guess the results. Let's play the family food.

[A]

Fun. This is fun.

[B]

We have the family food theme from the super Nintendo game version so that

[A]

we don't get in trouble.

[B]

Yeah, I think this one we, we've been able to clear. All right, so the theme is American. His favorite ice cream flavors. Okay, this is from the 2026 IDFA International Dairy Foods Association Ice cream and frozen novelty trends survey. So this is. These are currently America's favorite flavors. The top six answers are on the board. All right, Kimmy, What? What say you?

[C]

Vanilla.

[B]

Show me vanilla.

[A]

Good answer.

[C]

No. Okay.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

What? No, you're wrong.

[C]

Wait, where's the. Wait. Oh, wait. Sorry. I didn't have it up. I just started sweating. There was flops coming out.

[B]

I hope the answer's right here. I just need to know which.

[C]

I forgot the rules. This must be from the Richard Dawson years. Apparently. No, Steve Harvey.

[B]

This one. Vanilla is cracked. Villeno's number three on the board. Yeah, good answer.

[A]

All right, I'm up.

[B]

Go ahead, Mitch.

[A]

I'm going to go with chocolate.

[B]

Show me chocolate. Chocolate number one. I'm shocked by that.

[C]

I am shocked by that.

[B]

But chocolate's up there.

[A]

Vanilla could have been the number. The chocolate vanilla. You think are going to Be number one. But now there's number two. Is interesting.

[C]

Okay, I'm going to go, I'm going to get and take a guess.

[B]

I'm curious real quick. Where do you stand in the chocolate versus vanilla wars? I'm, I'm. This is a, this is a item of dispute between Mitch and I. I love vanilla. Vanilla is a flavor. It's not plain. Mitch is in chocolate country.

[C]

I like vanilla very much.

[B]

Yeah, but chocolate, nothing wrong with chocolate. I don't dislike chocolate Chipmunk.

[C]

Vanilla ice cream.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

Fuck.

[B]

Maybe we'll get vanilla ice cream tonight.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

All right. Kimmy, what your your next answer?

[C]

Mint chocolate chip.

[B]

Show me mint chocolate chip, please. No, it's not, it's not. We're only doing the top. Okay.

[C]

I saw it on the list and

[B]

you would have been wrong.

[A]

I would have been wrong too.

[B]

We have the full top 10 on the list, but we're only doing the top six because we'd be here all night. That's number 10. So if we're doing the top 10, you get one. But it's not canon.

[A]

Cuz we're only doing the top six.

[B]

Yeah, but we won't, we won't, we won't give you a strike for that one. Just say.

[A]

Wait. No,

[B]

we'll just say that was a non answer. All right, go ahead. Mitch.

[A]

Man, this is. Oh, coffee.

[B]

Survey says. Yeah, not in the top ten.

[A]

Not in the top ten.

[B]

I love coffee. It'd be my top.

[A]

That's wild. I thought that that would be my top five. Probably that wasn't, I had another answer but, but you're up.

[C]

I know what it is. Strawberry.

[A]

That is one of the things I was thinking but I have, I, I, I do have another one that I, I think that this is going to be in the top six.

[B]

Show me strawberry. Unfortunately now both have a strike. Also not in the top 10. Not in the top 10. Yeah.

[C]

Shocking to me.

[A]

I guess strawberry is not as, it's like what you think of, of like the base flavors, but it's not like a popular flavor.

[B]

I'm going to give you, I'm going to give you.

[A]

I, I got, I got, I got one. Cookies and cream.

[B]

Show me cookies and cream.

[C]

The best. Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Number four. Okay, so number two, number five and number six are still on the board. Are still hidden.

[A]

So we each have a strike.

[B]

You each have a strike. You each have one strike.

[C]

I mean I'll just say. Cause I was talking about it earlier. Cookie dough.

[A]

That's a good answer.

[C]

I don't know. It feels like it's not going to be good.

[B]

Survey says, yeah, it is in the top 10, but it's number eight. It's not.

[C]

All right. And that makes you feel good. Better.

[B]

Yeah. You were close.

[C]

Close.

[B]

I'm gonna give a. I'm gonna give a. I'll let you guess, and then I'm gonna give a hint if you don't get it.

[A]

Rocky road.

[B]

Oh, show me Rocky Road. Yeah, you have another. You each have two strikes. Now, this would have been, I think, if we'd s. Done the survey maybe 10 years ago, certainly 20 years ago. But I think rocky road is kind of cycled out of the popular flavors, the zeitgeisty flavors or the classic flavor. Remember, there's a 2026 survey. Okay.

[A]

20, 26. 26.

[B]

Let me give a hint. None of these involve fruit.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

They are all. You know, this is a very desserty list.

[C]

No, I don't.

[B]

Sounds like my diet.

[A]

Okay. Okay, Kimmy, you're up. This could be the end of both of us.

[C]

This is definitely gonna be the end of me because now I just want to do, like, a Silver Lake or Williamsburg answer.

[A]

I thought Rocky road was a good answer, hearing that there's no fruit. Yeah. 10 or 20 years ago. Okay.

[C]

No, they want to say Matcha.

[A]

That's a great answer.

[C]

No, it's not gonna be.

[B]

Survey says no. Yeah. I think this is a great guess, and I think probably 2036, by then, matcha will have reached critical mass in the. In the U.S. but I think right now it's still a little bit more of a niche, but I think it's a great guess. I love.

[A]

We can go. If I don't get one, we go out on a top high, by the way.

[B]

Okay, great. So

[A]

there. There is a thing in my head where. Like that. I'm not saying this, but the purple one, that. What's the. What's the sweet potato thing? U. But I'm not going to say U because I don't think it's in the top six. I'm going to go with salted caramel.

[B]

Oh, survey says yes. Number five is caramel. How about that?

[A]

Did that count?

[B]

That absolutely counts. Absolutely counts.

[A]

Definitely.

[C]

All right, buddy.

[B]

Mitch.

[C]

Mitch was pounding.

[B]

You win. You win. The family food. Can we. Can we do the thing they do on the show where we say that we. We reveal the other ones, and then we say what it is together?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, cool. All right. Number six was brownie.

[A]

Brownie.

[B]

And number two, butter pecan. I'm Shocked by that being that high.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Isn't that really high, too? I would have never guessed.

[A]

Where was cookie dough?

[B]

Cookie dough is number eight. I think cookie dough's falling down as, like, I feel like cookie dough's brownie bits have gotten.

[A]

Brownie has gone up.

[B]

Brownie's gone up.

[A]

This is that. This is recency bias.

[C]

Is it chocolate with brownies?

[A]

I mean, that is. It's just, like, chunks of brownie, but it doesn't.

[B]

You rarely see a flavor that's just cold brownie. So this. That's part of why the survey is a little bit tricky.

[A]

Give us the rest of the top ten.

[B]

The rest of the top ten. Number seven, chocolate chip. Makes sense. Number eight, cookie dough. Number nine, birthday cake. Birthday is a flavor. I'm a big birthday flavor.

[A]

These wouldn't have counted for us anyway.

[B]

And number 10, mint chocolate chip. So you got two. You got two more of the top 10. But I. Well played.

[A]

Fun as hell.

[B]

All right.

[C]

Just a little game girl. You know what I mean? Love a game night.

[B]

And I do you love a game night. Like, what do you. What are you playing on a game night?

[C]

Well, we've been doing all a lot of, like, because my kid. We do Catan Jr.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

We do Uno. We do Taco Cat Go's Pizza. We do Risk occasionally. Just if we want to, like, be playing forever. We have a lot of games. Ticket to ride.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

That one's fun. Yeah, that's a good one.

[B]

I don't do that anymore. I don't do that stuff anymore.

[C]

Running charades.

[B]

Running charades.

[C]

The most fun. Yeah.

[A]

Running charades.

[B]

Yeah. Explain running charades.

[C]

Okay, you guys, again, at your birthday, you'll be coming to me at Angel City Cable Charades.

[A]

You're taking me to an Angel City game for my birthday?

[C]

Yes. Happy birthday.

[B]

Fun.

[C]

You can have the pizza, though. But so you're basically like. You have a group of people. So if we were all on a team, there'd be, like, a game master, like, somewhere in, like, the lobby or whatever. So you would like. Let's say Amelia had, like, she had to do this. Like, okay, it's Disney princesses or whatever. So you would get us to guess the Disney princess. Once you got it, you would run and get the next clue from the game master. Whoever guessed it would go and get the next clue. So you're like, running.

[A]

That is fun.

[B]

That is fun.

[C]

Yeah. So it's like a race. Relay race.

[B]

That's tough because I'd love to be the game master, but I'D also love to run, so I don't know what I'd rather do.

[C]

Gotta keep that dumper.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But also the fun thing is at the end of it, usually there's a bigger theme that. So like once you get all guess all of the things, like. Cause there's team. So it's like us versus, like whoever other podcasts are here. Like we're all playing against each other. And so once you get all of the 10 whatevers, then you have to figure out what the theme is.

[B]

Right.

[C]

That runs between the clues.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And go back. You have to run again.

[A]

I mean, I definitely wouldn't be the runner, but I like the rest of the game.

[B]

I'd say we could play it here, but I just worry about us disrupting all the work that's going on at the Headgum offices. This place at full capacity, so I don't even know where we'd get this game going.

[C]

Invite everyone.

[B]

Yeah, that's probably the move. We'll probably just invite the whole staff. Then it would just be too many people.

[C]

Dough girls. Hey, come on.

[A]

We're going to have the whole staff. We might as well do it in Miami.

[B]

Just like a restorative value feedback. Let's open to first the feedback. We have a voicemail today. Let's take a listen.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Hey, Doe fam. It's your boy, DJ Daniel. First time, long time. This question is about smells. Now, Jimmy John's is famous for their sign that says free smells. But Jimmy John's doesn't really get my goat. But whenever I walk into a Krispy Kreme, that mix of coffee and donuts, that's that perfect aroma. Some might call it a potent mix. My question to you guys is, which rest restaurant first hits your senses of smell and makes you excited to eat? Thanks for everything.

[A]

He started that voicemail so fast. Then he started slowing down.

[B]

I thought he's dying. Yeah, really, really, really interesting cadence there. Dj.

[A]

Ends with just a flatline noise.

[B]

I love the potent mix Shout out

[C]

and I think are so nice.

[B]

This is a great question. So, Jimmy John's. I do like the free smells sign. Are you ever. You ever get yourself a Jimmy John's?

[A]

No, I don't like. I don't. I actually don't like free smells. It sounds gross.

[B]

I think it's fun and I think gross. And I think they're breaded is good and it's gross. It's kind of gross.

[A]

Free smells is disgusting.

[B]

Yeah, but I mean, that's part of the fun. It's Kind of like a smelly restaurant though. I think of Subway cuz their smell is so strong and you can smell it like three blocks and you don't want that smell. Back in my day, free smells is what. I haven't made.

[C]

Ham.

[B]

Completely incapable of finishing that sentence.

[C]

I have absolutely no idea what you just said.

[B]

Plus all coherence within seconds.

[A]

I'll tell you one of my two favorite combinations of smells. Honey and ham.

[B]

So which restaurant first hits your sense of smell and makes you excited to eat? I mean, Krispy Kreme is a good call. That is like a, a great, great smell. I do really like that coffee shop in general.

[C]

Like the smell of fresh coffee is

[B]

one of my favorite smells. I have an answer which is you walk into an artisan ice cream parlor and they're making them those cones in house. If you're smelling that fresh waffle cone being made.

[A]

I love that smell.

[B]

I was like, that smells like dessert and it doesn't smell like ice cream. But I'm like, this is dessert adjacent. I know. I was like, oh, maybe I'll get myself a cone. Why not? I can.

[A]

Butter pecan or brownie?

[B]

Butter pecan. Yeah, whatever you want.

[A]

Brownie. Give me a scoop of brownie. Brownie.

[C]

Give me a brownie butter pecan mix.

[A]

We got screwed. We got screwed on the damn thing.

[B]

I know.

[C]

You won. Take the win.

[A]

It was, it was. I, I mean, one of just reminding me because it's the summertime and we were talking about all this summer activity. A cheeseburger on the grill wags. I mean that burger on the grill smell.

[B]

Yeah. So I, I guess like in. If you maybe have like a restaurant that's using like a flame broiler or a. You sometimes get like a place that's got a char grill.

[A]

Well, this is what I was gonna say is that there's a place on. Is it Vermont or is it not Vermont? Hillhurst. The taco stand that makes like. It's that little taco stand. They also make a great burger.

[C]

Taco stand?

[A]

Yes. Yuccas, yucas. Yucas or yucas?

[B]

Yucas.

[A]

They do a burger there and they can smell it when I'm walking around the neighborhood.

[B]

And it's great when you get like a, this is a real, a real treat for a place that, like a Mexican restaurant that also has like an amber gesa. You know, they have, they have a, they have a nice, a good burger there. It's like, like, ah, you do that too. Why wouldn't you?

[A]

Is it supposed to be a Mix of two things. That's why I was saying uk Cuz it is, it's other. You know, it's like a, it's like a taco stand that makes burgers, but

[B]

I don't think it has.

[A]

I couldn't do. The coffee and donut smell, of course, is great.

[B]

Yeah, no, that's a good one.

[A]

But I can't, I can't think. I. Mm.

[C]

Sometimes when you go, I mean, I'm a vegetarian. Well, pescatarian. And I still love the smell of a burger. Yes. Like bacon on a grill or something. I'm like, oh, my God, it's damn good.

[B]

Yeah. Real good.

[C]

Guys. I was just on the Jersey Shore.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Like a couple weeks ago. And the. I was reminded of the smell of like, fudge because it was a fudge shop. And I was like, I want to live here. Like a candy shop with this fresh. There was fudge on the wall. Balls. It was so good, that rule. Spud, peanut butter, chocolate, vanilla.

[A]

Then there's some good mixes going on in there.

[C]

All of it.

[A]

You see Snooki or anyone like that. Snooki.

[C]

I didn't say Snooki, Mitch.

[A]

Snooki. Snooki with a cookie.

[C]

I played random slut number one in the Jersey Shoresical.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

The fringe version of the Jersey. Jersey Shore.

[B]

What a role. I know that is.

[A]

That's.

[C]

We were like the girls in Little shop who were like, do up. You know what I mean? We were random sluts. It was fun.

[A]

How was the old Jersey Shore gang going? I think they're still just doing Jersey Shore, right? In some way. I think that.

[B]

I have no idea. Isn't that show like 15 years old? They're doing, like, reunion stuff now.

[C]

Jim Tan, Laundry, Fudge.

[B]

If you have a question or comment

[A]

over the world, Mike's. I was gonna give a shout out to. You don't like it, but when you go into a movie theater, you don't like to hear smell that fresh popping corn.

[B]

No, this, this is like Kimmy and the, and the meat smell, which is like. Even though I'm not like a popcorn guy, I do love the smell of popcorn. I was like, this is a great smell. This is wonderful. This is delightful. Yeah. Why? Why not? I'm not a Scrooge about popcorn. Just not for me.

[A]

I, I, I'm not. Well, that is, that does kind of make you a script Scrooge about popcorn.

[B]

I'm not saying bah humbug to popcorn. I'm. But you are.

[A]

You're saying.

[B]

I'm saying no, thank you.

[A]

That's different. That's what Scrooge is doing, too.

[B]

Hey, if there's. If Scrooge was going around saying, no, thank you, he wouldn't have a reputation as such a crank. They'd be like, sir, can we please

[A]

get paid our money? No, thank you.

[B]

That was a conversation between me and Amelia and Emma.

[C]

If you have a question, we paid a popcorn. Sorry.

[B]

If you have a question or comment about the world of chain restaurants, you can email us@feedback birdfuck.com or leave us voicemail at 830-GO. That's 830-463-6844. Our producer is Emma Erdbrink. Our associate producer is Amelia Marino. Our video editor is Mike Dorfman. And Emma, we should say later this year we have some live shows in November. We are going to be going to Texas, Houston, Dallas, and Austin.

[C]

Austin.

[B]

We just added a late show, so

[C]

we got a whole new show in Austin.

[B]

And yeah. Birdfuck.com live early show sold out. Late show tickets are now available in Austin. So come join us. Double up if you're coming to the early.

[A]

I was. It's not Beauty and the Beast.

[C]

It's.

[A]

It's little.

[C]

It's Disney.

[A]

It is jizzy.

[C]

Let's go. Is that Aladdin?

[A]

What's that?

[B]

Oh, wait, it is Aladdin.

[A]

It's not even Little Mermaid. I'm up left and right. It's Disney. Which we'll get into that in a second. Wait, is that the only shows that we're talking about?

[B]

Actually, by the time this comes out,

[C]

Boston will be announced.

[B]

That's right. We're doing a live show Thanksgiving Eve in Boston. So come on.

[C]

After that, it's gonna be a good one.

[A]

That's gonna be crazy. Crazy one. And why.

[C]

Night of the year.

[A]

And our fans don't even need that occasion to be.

[B]

Neither do Bostonians.

[A]

Neither do Bostonians.

[B]

I think we're going back to the venue where someone puked on a fan

[A]

and it was like on a random day in May.

[C]

Wait, I'm sorry. On like a fan. Like, yeah, I'm a fan. Or like a blowing fan.

[B]

Not. Not a blowing fan. Thankfully. A fan projectile vomited on a bunch

[C]

of people in the balcony at a previous.

[A]

There might have. Well, there might as well have been a fan because I think it did shoot out.

[B]

I do think it hit a lot of people. Yeah.

[A]

And they try to blame it on my friends. They try to say that it was.

[B]

Yeah. Quincy Crew had been cut off at the.

[C]

Around the same time.

[B]

So it was confusing.

[A]

Wu got cut off because he was buying a bunch of people drinks, and they thought that he was very drunk, which he was. Well, yeah. Yeah, he was.

[C]

Do you play a drinking game with the live shows? No, no, it's not uncommon for us to get notified that someone's been.

[B]

Been cut off before our show even starts.

[C]

You guys know how to.

[A]

No, they do not. Our listeners do not wiser. Are you. Are you gonna. Are you gonna have Thanksgiving? I know that you now have another option, but you can have Thanksgiving with old Mitchell and. And Mitchell fans.

[B]

Am I invited? Of course. I would love to. That sounds wonderful, Mrs. Mitchell. Court.

[A]

You're going up. You're going up to Maine, Probably.

[B]

I have no idea.

[A]

And you're going. And you're going to Jersey. You're gonna. New York?

[C]

Actually, it might be.

[B]

I mean, look, my family lives in Jersey now, so.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I won't be too particular about where I'm from. Stories all over the place, and Thanksgiving usually is right around my birthday. Go there you go.

[B]

Go to an Angel City game. We go get a pizza.

[A]

Friend of the podcast, Eva Anderson, was nominated for an Emmy today.

[B]

Yeah. How about that?

[A]

I should say that.

[C]

You know what's.

[B]

Margo's got money trouble.

[C]

The piano in my living room was her uncle's piano.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

We're giving it away. Yeah.

[A]

That's crazy.

[B]

That is wild.

[A]

And also. And a bunch of UCB people and friends of the pod.

[B]

Yeah, a lot of people.

[A]

Katie Dipple, who we. We've asked Katie to come on the pod. She doesn't do pods, which we appreciate. She doesn't do our pod. She won't do. Which is a good thing where she's a friend. I don't want the listeners to get mad.

[B]

Love Katie. She's incredibly talented. So happy for her success. She is the one person. And this is. This was. We thought this was very funny. She's the one person who we asked to go on the podcast. And response to was simply, no,

[A]

it was good as hell. It was funny. Congrats.

[C]

Her more than anybody nominated writer.

[B]

So there you go. Made the right call.

[A]

She made the right call.

[B]

Hey, we also have the Doughboys double our weekly bonus episode [e-mail] doughboys Kimmy Gatewood, Descendants. Wicked Wonderland is on Disney Plus. Tell everyone about the movie, please. Plug away.

[C]

Oh, thank you so much. Yeah. It's the fifth in the franchise, and it takes place in Wonderland. So the Descendants Rise of Red was a reboot of the Descendants franchise. It's like the kids of the heroes and villains of all Disney movies. So it started 1, 2, 3. Kenny Ortega did the first trilogy. And then this is the new set of movies. And this one, the Queen of Hearts gets kidnapped by the new villain, the Maddox Hatter, who was a good guy in the last movie, and now he's a bad guy. And the kids have to get together together and save the queen. So it's kind of like we introduce a bunch of new characters. The big movie musical. And yeah, it's kind of like there's some, like, Goonies homage in there. There's a little Jurassic Park.

[A]

I love it.

[C]

A little bit of Indiana Jones if you look for it, if you watch it. That's all.

[A]

Hell, yeah. That's so exciting.

[B]

It's so cool because these are big movies, and, like, this is like, a very big production that you're directing. It's like, this is. This is quite. Like, the scale of this thing is really impressive.

[C]

Like, there was nine musical numbers which were all huge. They all, like, singing and dancing. Like, the first number is called Perfect Princess. And it took place in 15 locations, like, 250 dancers. And we shot, like, in castles and all over the place. It took almost the entire shoot, which was, like, 31 days. Like. Like, we did a little bit of everything. So that was. It was a really cool experience as a director because, like, first of all, you get to play in this, like, fantasy land, but also to, like, build your own Wonderland. Like, it's not to sound corny, but it's like a director's dream. It's like, there's many directors have made their own version of Wonderland. And, like, it was cool. Cause I even had my daughter design a mushroom for me. She did. It's called a double double mushroom. That's in front of the White Rabbit's cottage, if you check it out.

[B]

That's awesome.

[C]

It was fun. So there was, like, 300 mushrooms, I think, that we built. And, like, we made this giant chessboard, and we all did it, practically. Speaking of Muppets and puppet stuff, like, we did a lot of the sets and the movie magic, practically. Like, there's this thing called the Oraculum, which is. It's Alice in Wonderland. Y but they made this practical thing light up and spin and do all these cool things. So I love that. It was really cool.

[B]

It's so cool. Well, a lot of our listeners, like, you have. Have kids, have families, and this is a great thing for people to watch with their families on Disney. So check it out.

[A]

One of the last times I was at Arclight, which, God, I wish they'd bring me. Bring it back. It's sad. You're wearing a cool video shirt, by the way. Which rules. But, but Arclight, I loved Aright.

[B]

Snazzy jacket while we're at it.

[C]

I mean, come on, little sergeant Pepper St.

[A]

I, I, I, I, I loved ar. I think that this one of like the last times I was there, there was a Descendants premiere there and oh my God. Which is because it was probably like seven years ago or something, right? So maybe it was an earlier Descendants movie.

[C]

Maybe. Yeah.

[A]

But it was gigantically huge. It was crazy. So congratulations. It's much deserved.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So cool.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

The rules.

[B]

And thank you so much for coming on the show. We'll do it again. This was a hoot.

[C]

Thanks for having me.

[B]

I love how Jemmy just gets up when the show's wrapping up. She knows, like we're almost done. Oh, it got tossed to Emma for the live dates. All right, I'm gonna get the fuck out of here. Descendants. Wicked Wonderland on Disney plus. That'll do it for this episode of Doughboys. Until next time, for the spoon man, Mike Mitchell, I'm Nick Tucker Weiger. Happy eating.

[A]

See ya.

[B]

Hey, buddy. The long awaited Munch Madness live stream has happened, but you can experience the replay if you do not catch it live.

[A]

That's right, Wigs. We got a pre show, a main show and a post show. So it's a whopper of of. It's a whopper of content.

[B]

It's a pay per chew event that spanned approximately six hours and it is available with our guests, Nicole Byer and Betsy Sadaro. Who's funnier than them if you're not.

[A]

If we're not your cup of tea, you get Nicole Byer and Betsy Sadaro. What do you think of that?

[B]

They're everyone's cup of tea. It is $16, but patrons get 50% off. So think about this. Wow. You get in there, you join the Golden Plate Club, you join the Platinum and Plate Club, you're getting half price. You're basically getting a month's month's membership along with the live stream itself. Why not do it wise?

[A]

It's one of our biggest events every year. But I'll say this. Sign up for the Patreon buy the Munch Madness livestream finale. Don't buy it on iOS.

[B]

Don't buy it on iOS. There will be a surcharge. Just go through the browser on your mobile device or whatever you want to use. You can use A laptop. You can use the desktop.

[A]

Why not? They still exist.

[B]

Hey, I have one.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

I have a desktop and a laptop.

[A]

Not me, just a phone guy.

[B]

Now you don't have a laptop? No laptop.

[A]

I'm done with it.

[C]

How can you.

[B]

How can a man live without a laptop?

[A]

Simple.

[B]

Wow. I could never.

[A]

But you know what? Maybe I'll buy one to watch the Munch Madness livestream finale.

[B]

Yeah, that's a great investment. Get yourself a new laptop to watch the Munch Madness livestream finale recently. Pre show, main show, post show patreon.com doughboys that's patreon.com doughboys you think I

[A]

don't have a laptop, you dumb bitch?

[B]

I may have said pee show instead of pre show. I just want people to know it's a pre show, not a pee show.

[A]

Oh, pre show.

[B]

That's not a p show. Maybe someday, you know, you can get pregnant from pre show. So just be careful out there. Patreon.com doughboys hi, I am Mandy Moore.

[A]

Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast that was Us.

[B]

Now, on each episode, we're gonna go into a deep dive from our show. This is us.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors.

[A]

Are we gonna cry? Yes, a little bit. Are we gonna laugh a lot?

[B]

A whole lot.

[A]

That's what I'm hoping, man. Listen to that was us on your favorite podcast app. Or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify. New episodes every Tuesday.

[B]

That was a hitg.