
For the best results, Sue needs to take her emotions out of the business of settling her father's estate. Searching for advice? Call 1-800-DR-LAURA / 1-800-375-2872 or make an appointment at DrLaura.com
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Dr. Laura
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Caller
Hi.
Dr. Laura
Hi. What can I do for you?
Caller
I'm calling because we have been going through a family estate issue for four years almost.
Dr. Laura
Who died? Whose estate? Whose money? Who are we talking about? Give me the players.
Caller
My dad passed away. He was married twice, once to my mom and then once to my stepmom. So he had three children from the first marriage and two children from the second. And we've always been, you know, relatively close, but not super close. We've got a. Mostly my dad's estate was this family farm. It's been in the family for over 100 years that I've been mostly taking care of for the last 11 years as far as managing the different contracts and dealing with all the repairs.
Dr. Laura
And who. To whom did he leave. Woohoo. To whom did he leave the farm?
Caller
To the five children.
Dr. Laura
So he wanted you to split it five ways, the farm?
Caller
Well, that's. Yes, I guess that's the case. My husband's.
Dr. Laura
Don't guess. Don't guess. I need to understand what his will said. What did his will say about the farm?
Caller
His will said I leave. I leave the farm to my five children.
Dr. Laura
That's terrible when people do that. Okay.
Caller
We've all been committed to wanting to keep it in the family, to not having it developed, but unfortunately one of the five children has had kind of a vendetta against me since 2016 and has made the process miserable for me and for my husband by.
Dr. Laura
By doing what? How. How did that person have that much power?
Caller
By every communication, having insightful. I'm not insightful, but you know, passive aggressive comments, trying to accuse my husband essentially stealing, like, you know, like just really petty stuff which could always be refuted. But he eventually made life so miserable that I gave up the portion that I was originally going to want to get because he was making it so difficult and trying to, you know, say he didn't, he didn't agree with the appraisers and getting other people to come on board with that and then trying to take over part of that property. So I finally gave up that quest which I have been taking care of it, the whole thing for 11 years. And then they, I said, you know, I would take this other portion. They have given a proposal which I don't think is a fair proposal. So I ended up hiring an attorney because I felt like every I wasn't respected in anything that I was suggesting because I suggested.
Dr. Laura
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Dr. Laura
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Caller
The there's one that's the primary go to. He's the member manager of the LLC that owns half of the farm. And he's kind of the go to guy for making, you know, things go together. So he's been kind of steering the ship. The one brother has been very antagonistic. The other two have been very passive. Yeah. And now they're very, very angry that I hired an attorney to.
Dr. Laura
So what?
Caller
Be my voice.
Dr. Laura
So what? Just because two people had sex and eggs and sperm got together doesn't make any of them decent family members. And you should have taken care of this with an attorney sooner so you would have suffered less.
Caller
I agree.
Dr. Laura
So screw them. Who cares if they're pissed off? What do you care?
Caller
Well, they definitely have made me out to be the villain pretty much the entire process.
Dr. Laura
Well, because they're either. They're either creepy or they stand by and like to watch car accidents.
Caller
Yeah, that's how it feels for sure, in my shoes.
Dr. Laura
No, the big thing here is. The big thing here is that you're putting too much into DNA.
Caller
Okay, so do I just let the attorney do his thing, which might even.
Dr. Laura
Absolutely. You set that attorney. You go. Go for it. Get what I deserve. Go for it. Don't care who you piss off. Do it.
Caller
Wow. Okay. Which definitely will, you know, solidify their, I guess I'd say hatred towards me. Which are.
Dr. Laura
Not one of them. Not one of them cares about you.
Caller
Yeah, that's what it seems like.
Dr. Laura
It doesn't seem like it. Not one of them cares about you. Doesn't have. It's not an interpretive issue.
Caller
Yeah. Okay.
Dr. Laura
So them being mad at you, they didn't care about you. Who cares if they're mad at you? They didn't care about you.
Caller
Right.
Dr. Laura
And your father with his guilt ridden crap of two marriages, five kids died and left you all to, you know, eat each other up in the forest. That was pretty crappy of him, right? He didn't want to deal with it. He didn't want to deal with it. He wanted you all to fight it out.
Caller
What do you do with the fact that I've been. I've been really carrying the shoulders, you know, the weight on my shoulders.
Dr. Laura
That's what the attorney is for. You go and you get more than the equal share because you deserve more for the work you did. The attorney fights it, not you.
Caller
Okay, all right. Well, that's the. That's the hardest thing.
Dr. Laura
This is what's scary about women doing business. Around the world, we too often go into. But I don't want anybody to hate me. What is that? It's business, baby.
Caller
Well, I don't want to.
Dr. Laura
Honey, don't act like a freaking girl. Oh, my God. Just don't talk. Don't act like a girl. When you're doing business, you don't act like a girl.
Caller
Right.
Dr. Laura
This is business.
Caller
Okay.
Dr. Laura
They want their stuff and they're trying to intimidate you out of it. And you almost collapsed with the. Oh, I don't know. I'll just. Don't want my share. I just don't want to be exasperated. Please. They were waiting for that.
Caller
Okay, yeah, I've had that been said. Alrighty. Well, thank you very much for that clarity.
Dr. Laura
Good. I hope you are really clear. Really clear. Yeah. Okay, good. My number. Yeah. Her father was a coward. He didn't want to deal with it. I've heard that happening so often. I don't want to have to choose. So I'm just going to say throw it out there. You all figure it out. That's just terrible. Seriously, my number, 1-800-375-2872. When you're doing business, forget you're a girl. Make yourself a businessperson, not a girl. Check out my social media. On Facebook and Instagram, I post stories, photos and videos seven days a week and feature some of what you sent me, too. There's always something interesting going on there. You can find me at facebook.com drlaura and instagram.com drlauraprogram.
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Episode Title: Don't Do Business Like a Girl
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Release Date: March 16, 2025
Podcast: Dr. Laura Call of the Day
Platform: SiriusXM Triumph 111
In the March 16, 2025 episode of "Dr. Laura Call of the Day," Dr. Laura Schlessinger tackles the intricate and emotionally charged topic of family estate disputes. Titled "Don't Do Business Like a Girl," the episode delves into the challenges of managing familial relationships and business matters simultaneously, emphasizing the importance of approaching conflicts with a business-oriented mindset rather than letting emotions and personal relationships dictate outcomes.
The episode centers around a caller grappling with a prolonged family estate dispute. The caller shares her predicament involving her late father's will and the subsequent division of a longstanding family farm.
Notable Quote:
"My dad passed away. He was married twice... and we've always been, you know, relatively close, but not super close."
— Caller [01:09]
Dr. Laura responds to the caller's distress by urging her to dissociate personal feelings from business dealings. She underscores the necessity of treating estate matters as business transactions to achieve equitable resolutions without being bogged down by familial emotions.
Notable Quotes:
"So what? Just because two people had sex and eggs and sperm got together doesn't make any of them decent family members. And you should have taken care of this with an attorney sooner so you would have suffered less."
— Dr. Laura [08:18]
"When you're doing business, forget you're a girl. Make yourself a businessperson, not a girl."
— Dr. Laura [11:10]
The episode's title, "Don't Do Business Like a Girl," encapsulates Dr. Laura's critique of how gender stereotypes can impede effective business dealings, especially within family disputes. She challenges societal norms that associate femininity with passivity or emotional decision-making in professional contexts.
Notable Quote:
"This is business, baby."
— Dr. Laura [10:03]
By the episode's conclusion, Dr. Laura reinforces the caller's decision to involve an attorney, validating her pursuit of a fair share despite familial discord. She reiterates the importance of prioritizing personal and financial well-being over contentious relationships.
Notable Quote:
"They didn't care about you. Who cares if they're mad at you? They didn't care about you."
— Dr. Laura [10:21]
"Don't Do Business Like a Girl" serves as a compelling episode that blends personal responsibility with pragmatic business strategies. Dr. Laura Schlessinger provides invaluable advice for navigating complex familial and business relationships, urging listeners to adopt a professional demeanor and prioritize fairness and accountability over emotional entanglements.
Listeners grappling with similar issues will find Dr. Laura's no-nonsense approach both empowering and instructive, reinforcing the importance of standing firm in one's rights while managing familial obligations with integrity and assertiveness.
Connect with Dr. Laura: For more insights and advice, listeners are encouraged to join Dr. Laura’s live radio program available Monday through Friday from 2 to 5 pm Eastern Time on SiriusXM Triumph 111 and visit DrLaura.com to become a Family member.