Don't Hold Your Peace

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day – "Don't Hold Your Peace"

Episode Information:

• Title: Don't Hold Your Peace
• Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
• Release Date: January 26, 2025
• Platform: SiriusXM Triumph 111

---

Introduction

In the episode titled "Don't Hold Your Peace," Dr. Laura Schlessinger addresses a heartfelt dilemma presented by a listener facing significant family challenges during a critical time. The conversation delves into themes of family support, communication, and personal responsibility in the face of adversity.

Listener's Dilemma

Caller: A dedicated listener reaches out to Dr. Laura for guidance, sharing a deeply personal struggle:

• Situation: The caller's husband was diagnosed with cancer in January, leading to immense emotional and logistical challenges as they approach the holiday season.
• Family Dynamics: Despite previously being supportive, the husband's family has become distant and unacknowledged the caller and her children since the diagnosis.

Key Quote:

"My husband was diagnosed with cancer in January and it's been very challenging and it's hard as we approach the holidays to figure out how to spend that time with his family because his family has not been very supportive to myself or my children."
— Caller [00:51]

Dr. Laura's Response

Dr. Laura empathizes with the caller's situation and seeks to understand the shift in family support:

• Clarifying the Change: She inquires whether the lack of support is a new development post-diagnosis or an ongoing issue.

  Key Quote:

  "Are you only talking about since the diagnosis or is this just always been the case?"
  — Dr. Laura [01:27]

• Encouraging Direct Communication: Dr. Laura emphasizes the importance of confronting the issue head-on. She advises the caller to communicate her needs clearly and directly with her husband's mother.

  Key Quote:

  "You've got to be able to speak up. Why complaining in silence is your choice."
  — Dr. Laura [07:14]

Strategies for Improvement

Dr. Laura offers practical steps to address the lack of support:

1. Initiate a Candid Conversation: Encourage the caller to have an honest discussion with her husband's mother about the support needed.

   Key Quote:

   "Pick up the phone and say this directly, please."
   — Dr. Laura [07:31]

2. Identify Underlying Issues: If resistance continues, Dr. Laura suggests exploring potential reasons behind the family's withdrawal, such as fear or misunderstanding.

   Key Quote:

   "If there is no response, then you have to think, what's wrong with them? Are they scared?"
   — Dr. Laura [03:47]

3. Assert Personal Needs: She underscores the necessity of advocating for oneself and one’s family, promoting ethical accountability and personal responsibility.

   Key Quote:

   "If you're going to advocate for him, then you're going to have to be courageously clear up front and reasonably blunt."
   — Dr. Laura [02:30]

Conclusion and Empowerment

Dr. Laura concludes the conversation by empowering the caller to take decisive action. She reinforces the importance of not allowing fear or hesitation to hinder necessary conversations that can lead to improved family dynamics and support systems.

Key Quote:

"You've got to be able to speak up. Why complaining in silence is your choice."
— Dr. Laura [07:27]

Final Thoughts

In "Don't Hold Your Peace," Dr. Laura Schlessinger masterfully navigates a complex emotional landscape, providing compassionate yet firm advice. She champions the values of direct communication and personal responsibility, encouraging listeners to confront their challenges proactively to foster better relationships and support networks.

---

For More Episodes: Visit DrLaura.com to become a Family member and access more insightful discussions on parenting, family, and personal growth.

Transcript

[A]

If you have a locked AT&T phone, we're here with bolt cutters. T Mobile will help pay off your locked phone and give you a new 5G phone for free. All on America's largest 5G network. Visit t mobile.com carrierfreedom via virtual prepaid.

[B]

MasterCard in 15 days. Free phone up to $830 via 24 monthly bill credits plus tax and a $10 device connection charge. Qualifying port and trade in service on Go 5G next and credit required. Contact us before canceling entire account to continue bill credits or credit stop and balance on required finance agreements. Do you have bill credits and if you pay off devices early.

[C]

Thanks for downloading my Call of the Day podcast. You too can participate in my live radio program heard weekdays from 2 to 5pm Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111 Kerry, welcome to the program.

[D]

Hi, how are you?

[C]

Good. How can I help?

[D]

Sure. So trying to figure out. Longtime listener, big fan. Thank you so much for taking my call. I'm just trying to navigate My husband was diagnosed with cancer in January and it's been very challenging and it's hard as we approach the holidays to figure out how to spend that time with his family because his family has not been very supportive to myself or my children. They've not really acknowledged us in the equation.

[C]

I'm sorry, are you only talking about since the diagnosis or is this just always been the case.

[D]

Since the diagnosis?

[C]

So before this they were very supportive and very invested and involved?

[D]

More so, yes, yes.

[C]

Well, what do you mean they haven't been supportive during this time? What is it you would have liked them to to do?

[D]

Maybe visited, maybe offered to go to a chemo treatment, maybe stopped over for dinner or brought over dinner or took my husband for a walk or reached out text messages, just acknowledging or.

[C]

So when you got on the phone with, when you got on the phone with his mother and you said all of this, what was her response?

[D]

Oh, you don't discuss that with the mother. The mother doesn't just talk to her in laws.

[C]

Really? Only when you said. When you said what you exactly said to me. When you say that directly to her in person or on the phone, what does she say? If you haven't done that, it's not a discussion. It's not a discussion, it's you clarifying. He's your son, he's sick. It's a serious cancer. It would be nice if you would take him for a walk, go to the thing, come over for dinner. What's keeping you back? If you're going to advocate for him, then you're going to have to be courageously clear up front and reasonably blunt. Just like you did it. You gave a beautiful rendition of what you think they ought to be doing. Tell her that. And then if there is no response, then you have to think, what's wrong with them? Are they scared? Do they often? Are they thinking he's going to die? Are they afraid to see him sick? What is the problem? I mean, what do you think the problem is? Why? If they have been nice all along and they like their kid and they don't hate you, why would they not do something for their son? I mean why not say that they.

[D]

Are nice and engaged fully but they do like check in or they would they really own his mom really only speaks to her son. She hasn't historically.

[C]

Okay, you're not answering my question. I want to know why their son is ill, why they would not what would keep them from doing more or some of those things on your list. Curling up on the couch for a movie is one of my favorite ways to end the day. Lily's always right there with me and we have a new addition to our movie nights, the fluffiest pretty rosewater pink Lola Blanket. Lola blankets are unbelievably soft double sided faux fur blankets with a huggable stretch that molds to your body. Lola blankets come in a beautiful array of colors and three different sizes so you can find just the right fit for your family. They even offer weighted blankets for better sleep and relaxation and super cute knotted faux fur pillows. With thousands of five star reviews, Lola blankets are the must have upgrade your home and comfort deserve. So go to lolablankets.com use my code drlaura at checkout. 40% off. An incredible discount just for you my listener. What are you waiting for? Go to lola blankets.com today and experience the life changing softness for yourself.

[A]

If you love your phone but not your carrier, just switch to T Mobile. You can keep your phone, keep your number and we'll help pay it off up to $800 per line. You can also use our savings calculator to compare our plans and streaming benefits against Verizon and AT&T. So switch and keep your phone, keep your number and keep more of your moolah. @t mobile.com up to four lines via virtual prepaid card.

[B]

Allow 15 days qualifying unlock device credit service port in 90 plus days with device and eligible carrier and timely redemption. Required card has no cash access and expires in six months.

[C]

Did you know that skin care can start in the laundry room. The Dr. Laura program is happy to be partnering with our sponsor, All Free Clear Laundry Detergent. My peeps with kids are especially thrilled to use it because it's 100% free of dyes and perfumes. All Free Clear is the number one laundry detergent brand recommended for sensitive skin by pediatricians, dermatologists and allergists. For a clean you can feel good about, all you need is All Free Clear. When I had a kidlet living at home, the technology did not exist to tell me where he was at any given time. But it does today, thanks to Life360. Coordinating your family's activities and keeping them safe has never been easier. Life360 is a location sharing app that works on your mobile phone, letting you see the real time locations of your family members. Got a kid in college? Life360's roadside and emergency response programs can give you peace of mind. Teen driver in the family life360 lets you easily monitor their driving speed. Plus you can attach a Life360 tile tracker to bikes, keys, soccer bags, and more. When I get mine, I just may attach it to Lily's collar. Whether you're in the carpooling phase, raising young adults, or keeping an eye on elderly parents, you can stay connected to the ones you love. With Life360, visit life360.com or download the app today and use the code DRLAURA to get 15% off. That's life360.com code DRLAURA.

[D]

I'm not sure. Well, she is older.

[C]

Okay, I want you to pick up the phone. I want you to pick up the phone. Stop being gutless and making excuses. Pick up the phone and say this directly, please.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

In fact, hang up right now. Do it and then call me back right now. Do it. There's no time and space in the world for having a legitimate issue, complaint, concern, something that needs to be communicated. Complaining about it, but not confronting it. It needs to be confronted. So let's everybody stop being so scaredy catty. Nobody's going to put you in your room without supper, but her list is totally reasonable. Can't imagine a mom and a dad not doing that. So something's up and if we don't know what it is, then we've got to go to part one, which is to be direct. These are the things that it would be very nice if you would do to help him and me and the kids. Help us all get through this. Folks. You've got to be able to speak up. Why complaining in silence is your choice. I know you're being gutless, but you can't and have your life as blessed as it could be. My number 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

[E]

If your small business is booming and ready to expand, you might say something like it's happening.

[C]

Crushed it.

[E]

But if you need someone who can actually help protect your growing business, just say like a good neighbor, State Farm. He's there. And just like that, your State Farm agent can help you get the coverage you need for your new space for your small business insurance needs. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.