I Feel Like I Live in a Zoo

Summary

Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day – "I Feel Like I Live in a Zoo"

Episode Overview In the episode titled "I Feel Like I Live in a Zoo," Dr. Laura Schlessinger tackles the challenges of adapting to rural life and managing household responsibilities after a significant lifestyle change. Released on June 1, 2025, this episode explores themes of adaptation, responsibility, and effective communication within a blended family dynamic.

Introduction Dr. Laura welcomes her long-time listeners and introduces the day's caller, Jenny, who has been a dedicated follower for 26 years. Jenny credits Dr. Laura’s advice for her decision to become a stay-at-home mom, setting the stage for a heartfelt and personal discussion.

Caller’s Background and Dilemma Jenny explains her recent life changes, having remarried four years ago after a 20-year marriage to her children's father. The family relocated from a bustling city to a large ranch during the COVID pandemic, seeking tranquility away from urban chaos such as fires, riots, and lockdowns.

Jenny (01:01): "We moved during COVID to a large ranch... I think it was a little bit of a chance to get away from the city and do something new during the COVID time."

Despite her husband being kind and sweet, Jenny faces difficulties adjusting to the rural lifestyle, particularly with the responsibilities that come with ranch life.

Financial Arrangements and Property Ownership A significant aspect of Jenny’s dilemma revolves around the financial arrangements of their new home. Jenny funded the purchase of the ranch herself, placing it in her adult children's names through a trust to secure their future.

Jenny (05:08): "I put the ranch in my adult children's name. So it's in a trust so if anything ever happened, it would go to them."

Dr. Laura probes into the financial dynamics, confirming that the ranch was a personal investment by Jenny, with her husband contributing through work on the property rather than direct financial input.

Household Management and Growing Resentment The core of Jenny’s frustration stems from the increasing number of pets and the added household chores. Initially, the couple decided to limit their pets, but decisions by her husband have led to an unexpected increase in animals, particularly dogs.

Jenny (06:24): "We had one dog... he decided to keep two of them because he fell in love with them. So now we have four dogs."

The unplanned expansion of their pet family has translated into more chores and a sense of living in chaos, contrasting with Jenny's desire for order and a peaceful home environment.

Dr. Laura’s Advice and Solutions Dr. Laura addresses Jenny’s concerns by first understanding the specific sources of her distress, distinguishing between issues related to the chickens versus the dogs.

Dr. Laura (08:05): "Are the chickens the problem or the dogs?"

Upon identifying that the main issue is with the dogs, Dr. Laura recommends seeking professional training to manage and control the animals, thus reducing household chaos.

Dr. Laura (08:25): "Tell you what, I'm sure somewhere near where you live, there is a dog trainer who can train you to get control over the animals so it's less chaos for you. That's a simple fix."

She emphasizes the effectiveness of training, sharing her observations of well-behaved dogs under professional guidance.

Dr. Laura (08:40): "I've seen trainers have... and they don't move until you call their specific name. Dogs are very readily trainable."

Jenny appreciates the suggestion, acknowledging it as a feasible and positive solution to her predicament.

Closing Remarks The episode concludes with Jenny expressing gratitude for Dr. Laura’s guidance and mentioning her continued support through purchasing Dr. Laura’s books for newly married couples. Dr. Laura reaffirms her confidence in Jenny’s ability to improve her household dynamics with the proposed solutions.

Jenny (09:26): "You are the best... that's always what I send them when I get them."

Dr. Laura (09:30): "Well, you are the best... you're going to love it when these dogs are trained."

Key Takeaways

• Adaptation to Change: Transitioning from city life to a rural setting can introduce unforeseen challenges, requiring flexibility and effective problem-solving.
• Financial Independence: Managing property and financial responsibilities independently can empower individuals but may also lead to complex family dynamics.
• Importance of Professional Help: Seeking professional assistance, such as dog training, can alleviate household stress and restore harmony.
• Effective Communication: Open dialogue between partners about expectations and responsibilities is crucial in maintaining a balanced and peaceful home environment.

Notable Quotes

• Jenny (01:01): "I think it was a little bit of a chance to get away from the city and do something new during the COVID time."
• Dr. Laura (08:25): "Tell you what, I'm sure somewhere near where you live, there is a dog trainer who can train you to get control over the animals so it's less chaos for you."
• Dr. Laura (09:30): "You're going to love it when these dogs are trained. You're going to love having that control, I promise you."

This episode provides valuable insights into managing significant life changes, the importance of maintaining personal responsibilities, and the benefits of professional guidance in overcoming household challenges. Dr. Laura’s compassionate and pragmatic approach offers listeners actionable solutions to similar dilemmas.

Transcript

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[Dr. Laura]

Thanks for listening to my Call of the Day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5pm Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Jenny. Welcome to the program.

[Caller]

Hi, Dr. Laura. I've been listening to you for 26 years and you're the reason I was a stay at home mom. When my baby was little, I was in San Francisco and I heard what you had to say and it's been the best listening to you so many years.

[Dr. Laura]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Caller]

So I have a life dilemma and it's a little weird. I remarried four years ago. I was married to my children's father for 20 and we moved during COVID to a large ranch and we had lived in a big, big city. So my dilemma is my husband is a very sweet, kind man. However, he keeps well.

[Dr. Laura]

No, no, no, slow down, slow down, slow down. How did you meet a guy who lives on a ranch?

[Caller]

So he lived in the big city as well. And when he was getting ready to retire, we. We decided, hey, why don't we randomly buy a ranch? He grew up on a farm originally, so he. That's what he wanted to get back to.

[Dr. Laura]

And do you have any experience on a ranch with lots of dirt and horses?

[Caller]

Zero.

[Dr. Laura]

What made you think that was interesting? You got to tell me where this came from.

[Caller]

I think I found it. Yeah, I found it interesting. The city we were in had so many issues with fires and riots and shutdowns and we'd walk out of our condo and there would be fires in the dumpster. So I think it was a little bit of a chance to get away from the city and do something new during the COVID time.

[Dr. Laura]

So whose money?

[Caller]

My sons had gone off to college.

[Dr. Laura]

So whose money paid for the ranch?

[Caller]

Me. Mine.

[Dr. Laura]

You bought a ranch?

[Caller]

Correct.

[Dr. Laura]

May I ask how much this ranch cost?

[Caller]

The ranch at the time before COVID was 900,000.

[Dr. Laura]

And how big is it?

[Caller]

Put about a million in.

[Dr. Laura]

Hmm. Whose million? His or yours or ours?

[Caller]

Mine.

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[Dr. Laura]

Okay, Did he have no money or did he just not want to participate financially?

[Caller]

He had a pet, he has a pension and he had a little bit of money. I put the ranch in my adult children's name. So it's in a trust so if anything ever happened, it would go to them. So I didn't feel like it was throwing away the money as much as giving them something potentially for the future.

[Dr. Laura]

Got it. Okay. Did you talk to an attorney or a CPA about his living there and what rights financially that gives him?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Dr. Laura]

And what did you discover?

[Caller]

Well, it's it was in a clear prenup And a clear trust that if anything happened to us, he would get a portion of it that he's put in with his own money. And he actually works on the ranch thing, you know, doing the plumbing, electrical, and many of the upgrades. So if we were to sell it, he would get a specific portion based on what he's put in.

[Dr. Laura]

Right. Okay, so how can I help?

[Caller]

Okay, so we moved here and for instance, we had. I'm actually. The question is, I'm struggling to be kind and nice and having him wake up. And I always love your saying, do something kind and make them remember why you married them. And we, we got one dog and then we got a dog for the dog. And then in December, he was. Wanted a litter. He always wanted one litter of puppies to see that. And we had decided we were giving them all away, you know, selling or giving them away. And he decided to keep two of them because he fell in love with them. So now we have four dogs. And when we first moved here, we were getting chicken. So I said, okay, let's do eight. And he ordered 80. So I find myself very resentful because now I have so many chores where that wasn't the plan.

[Dr. Laura]

And May I ask a few questions? He's not working. He wants these animals. Why isn't he taking care of them? Why do you have chores?

[Caller]

Well, when he came out here, he did get a job that he gets to. He's basically. He works in the water commissioning world. So he ended up getting a quote day job and then does other chores around the property in the evening.

[Dr. Laura]

So why are you doing chores?

[Caller]

Well, because if I don't, he won't. And then I feel like I live in a. Just like it's a complete shit show with everything. So I like nice things and order.

[Dr. Laura]

I don't know that, Ford, ma' am. I don't know that. So are the chickens the problem or the dogs?

[Caller]

The dog.

[Dr. Laura]

Oh, so you're good with 80 chickens?

[Caller]

Well, they're not as big of a hassle because they're not in the house with us and, you know, jumping around and they're just dirty coming in and out and it's just.

[Dr. Laura]

Tell you what, I'm sure somewhere near where you live, there is a dog trainer who can train you to get control over the animals so it's less chaos for you. That's simple fix.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Dr. Laura]

I mean, I've seen trainers have. They have eight dogs in a row. They're all shoulder to shoulder sitting there. And you call each one by name and they don't move until you call their specific name. Dogs are very readily. Most of them are very readily trainable. Get a trainer.

[Caller]

I like that.

[Dr. Laura]

It's fun, too. When your dog can do all kinds of things and you can stop them from doing the things they shouldn't be doing. It's a lot of fun.

[Caller]

Okay, I like that suggestion.

[Dr. Laura]

Good.

[Caller]

Okay. Well, you are the best. And I love buying your books for these new young people who are getting married. That's always what I send them when I get the.

[Dr. Laura]

By the way, are your chickens making a lot of eggs?

[Caller]

They make so many eggs, which is really nice. And they also. I mean, they. You know what? They're all around me right now as we speak, and all of a sudden they're quiet. It's like children when you want them to make a noise, they don't.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, are you selling the eggs?

[Caller]

You know what I give. I. I'm a nurse, so I get. I bring a lot to the hospital and I give them away, basically. It's hard to sell them. Yeah.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, I'm glad. The only problem is significant problem we can readily repair. And you're going to love it when these dogs are trained. You're going to love having that control, I promise you. Love, love, love, love, love, love it. My number, 1-800-375-2872. You're just a click away from some terrific deals being offered by companies that get the Dr. Laura stamp of approval. Visit DrLaura.com, click on sponsors to take advantage of the special Discounts available to DrLaura listeners like you.

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