Podcast Summary: Dr. Laura Call of the Day

Episode: Is It Time To Let Go?
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Date: October 15, 2025

Overview

This episode focuses on the complexities of navigating romantic relationships later in life, especially when emotional needs and intentions are mismatched. Dr. Laura advises Robert, a 65-year-old widower, about his on-again, off-again relationship with a woman who is hesitant to commit due to past trauma. The main theme centers on self-honesty, emotional maturity, and the necessity of clear intentions in relationships as we age.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Robert's Relationship History & Dilemma (00:58–05:15)

• Background:

  • Robert, 65, has been dating a 56-year-old woman for three years. Both have adult children and knew each other in the past.
  • Relationship began casually, with neither party interested in commitment at first.
  • "I just, you know, explained to her that I would like to just keep going forward with the dating and build on that relationship." (03:32–03:38, Caller)

• Problems Arise:

  • About a year ago, the woman began distancing herself.
  • She confided that a court case involving her ex-husband resurfaced trauma, making her wary of moving forward romantically.
  • Robert tried to communicate and clarify intentions, but she remained unsure about the relationship’s direction.

• Notable Quote:

  • “There were times that kind of felt that I was more into it than she was, but decided it was better to keep going than not have anybody at all.” (01:57–02:07, Caller)

2. Dr. Laura Explores Robert's Boundaries (05:15–10:12)

• Direct Questioning:

  • Dr. Laura asks Robert to clarify whether he’d be content seeing her only when she wanted, or if he needed more.
  • She pushes Robert to answer with radical honesty, steering him away from ambiguity.

• Key Exchange:

  • Dr. Laura: "Would you be willing to continue seeing her whenever she's willing to see you rather than break up?" (05:15–05:20, Dr. Laura)
  • Robert hesitates but ultimately says no: “No, I don’t think I could under the relationship that we – that she wants.” (10:12, Caller)

• Dr. Laura’s Tough Love:

  • "Until you can answer the question, then you’re no less screwed up than she is. Okay?” (10:01–10:06, Dr. Laura)
  • "So it’s time to let go." (10:48, Dr. Laura)

3. Lessons on Emotional Honesty & Maturity (10:54–12:50)

• The Risk of Casual Relationships:

  • Dr. Laura points out that casual relationships often leave one party hurt when deeper feelings develop:
    • "Screwing around with somebody saying this is only fun rarely stays that way for at least one of the two." (10:57–11:05, Dr. Laura)
    • “We’re human beings. We crave the connection. We crave permanency. When we’re comfortable and content and happy and safe, we crave it." (11:19–11:28, Dr. Laura)

• Advice for Future Relationships:

  • Robert acknowledges he should discuss intentions early on:
    • "The one thing I have learned is if a chance comes again that the conversation will take place a lot sooner than before any feelings develop." (11:05–11:13, Caller)

• On Mixed Signals:

  • Dr. Laura criticizes ambiguous statements about marriage:
    • “I really don’t want a marriage. But if you are leaning toward that, I might turn... That’s juvenile and you’re too old for that." (11:56–12:17, Dr. Laura)
    • "Don’t say I’m just going to show a little toe. Maybe they’ll take the foot. Don’t play games. Be honest with yourself." (12:50–12:59, Dr. Laura)

• Notable Closing Advice:

  • “Life is awfully short, honey. You’re not going to be alive in 40 more years, so don't mess around with it." (13:38–13:45, Dr. Laura)

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Dr. Laura’s directness is unrelenting and poignant:
  • "Until you can answer the question, then you're no less screwed up than she is. Okay?” (10:01–10:06)
  • “It’s time to let go.” (10:48)
  • "Don't play games. Be honest with yourself. I want to marry her—yes or no? Yes. She is not interested in doing that. Yeah, that's a yes too. Am I willing to just fool around? Not anymore. It hurts me too much. Cold, bare bones truths." (12:50–13:38)

Important Timestamps

• 00:58 – Robert introduces his issue
• 02:53 – Robert details how his girlfriend distanced herself
• 05:15 – Dr. Laura asks if Robert would settle for her level of commitment
• 10:01 – Dr. Laura challenges Robert on his indecision
• 10:48 – Dr. Laura concludes, “It’s time to let go”
• 11:05 – Advice on early, clear communication in relationships
• 11:56–12:50 – Critique of mixed signals and “game playing” in relationships
• 13:38 – "Life is awfully short, honey..." (Dr. Laura’s closing advice)

Summary Takeaways

• Clarity and emotional honesty are essential in relationships at any age.
• Avoiding difficult conversations or settling for less leads to pain and confusion.
• Growing connection in casual relationships is natural; pretending otherwise is self-deception.
• Life is too short to waste time on ambiguous or mismatched relationships.

For more advice and listener stories, tune in to Dr. Laura’s daily show on SiriusXM Triumph 111.