Podcast Summary: The Dr. Laura Podcast – “Kaye Has a Big Problem on Her Hands”

Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Date: November 17, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Dr. Laura takes a call from Kaye, a recurring listener seeking advice for the fourth time. Kaye faces a parenting dilemma: her nearly nine-year-old daughter, eager to learn braiding, wants a mannequin head for her birthday. Kaye’s husband, however, strongly objects to the gift. The episode delves deeply into the underlying reasons for his objection, revealing personal and sensitive family dynamics, particularly relating to his ongoing recovery from pornography addiction. Dr. Laura delivers her trademark blunt assessment, focusing on protecting the child and encouraging Kaye to prioritize her daughter’s development and interests.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

Kaye Outlines the Dilemma

• [02:24] Kaye explains her daughter’s interest in learning to braid hair, expressing support for her daughter's creativity and skill-earning ideas.
  • Quote: “She has asked a few times now... some ideas for her birthday and one of the ideas is one of the mannequin heads with fake hair that she can learn how to braid.”
• Kaye describes the family background: four children, 13 years of happy marriage.

The Husband’s Objection

• [03:10] Kaye shares that her husband is “adamantly against” the mannequin head.
• [07:00] Discussing reasons, Kaye reveals: “My husband is in active recovery for pornography addiction.”
  • Dr. Laura immediately signals concern.
  • Quote (Dr. Laura): “[07:12] Did you ever observe the porn he was watching?”

Dr. Laura’s Interrogation and Analysis

• Dr. Laura stresses the importance of knowing precisely what kind of pornography was involved, suggesting possible links to the husband's discomfort.
  • Quote: “[07:32] You can’t be quite positive of anything if you have never seen it... you hope to hell it wasn’t kitty porn, but you don’t really know.”
• She probes Kaye about the husband’s stated reasons, receiving a vague response: he called braiding “high maintenance.”
  • Quote: “[08:08] How is that high maintenance? To learn how to do braids?”

Dr. Laura’s Advice to Kaye

• Dr. Laura is clear and direct in her recommendation:
  • [08:14] “There’s something terribly wrong with him. And I would get her the Styrofoam head with the things and a little video on how to make braids. And I would tell him if he opens his mouth and says one thing negative about them to her, that he’s going to have to go stay at his mother’s house for a month.”
• Dr. Laura repeatedly states the importance of prioritizing the child’s best interest over Kaye’s marriage.
  • Quote: “[10:23] Remember, I don’t give a damn about your marriage. I only care about your kid.”

Family and Recovery Dynamics

• Kaye says they are “working this program together” and are “open and close” about her husband’s recovery.
• Dr. Laura challenges Kaye on not investigating what type of pornography was involved, suggesting it reflects a reluctance to fully confront the issue.
  • Quote: “[08:52] Which is why you never check to see what kind of porn it was.”
  • Quote: “[10:09] I don’t know what his problem is, but you’re going to have to push this and maybe then you’ll find out what the problem really is.”

Protective Parenting

• Dr. Laura assures Kaye that girls often enjoy doing each other's hair and that this is a normal, harmless activity.
  • Quote: “[10:09] That’s what girls do.”
• Dr. Laura emphasizes again her primary concern is for the daughter, not the adult dynamics.
  • Quote: “[10:23] She’s the only part of this that has no power to make decisions.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [07:32] Dr. Laura: “You can’t be quite positive of anything if you have never seen it. Don’t go there. You hope to hell it wasn’t kitty porn, but you don’t really know. That’s the problem.”
• [08:14] Dr. Laura: “There’s something terribly wrong with him... if he opens his mouth and says one thing negative about them to her, that he’s going to have to go stay at his mother’s house for a month.”
• [10:23] Dr. Laura: “Remember, I don’t give a damn about your marriage. I only care about your kid. Yeah, keep that in mind, because that’s the first concern. Because she’s the only part of this that has no power to make decisions.”
• [09:07] Dr. Laura: “Every time I can’t figure out how to use my computer, I call a friend.”

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [02:24] Caller describes daughter’s interest in braiding and asks for advice.
• [03:10] Caller reveals husband’s strong objection.
• [07:00] Disclosure of husband’s pornography addiction recovery.
• [08:14] Dr. Laura’s direct advice: support daughter, confront husband if necessary.
• [10:09] Dr. Laura elaborates on the need to protect the child above all else.
• [10:23] Dr. Laura’s powerful closing statements on parental priorities.

Episode Tone

Dr. Laura is characteristically direct, occasionally acerbic, but always focused on the well-being of the child. She is skeptical of Kaye’s willingness to accept surface-level answers from her husband regarding his opposition and is firm in her stance that a child's development and emotional safety come first. The episode is a pointed reminder of Dr. Laura’s philosophy: protect children, confront uncomfortable realities, and don’t let adult discomfort overshadow what’s best for the youngest family members.

In summary:
This episode exemplifies Dr. Laura’s no-nonsense approach, placing children's best interests above adult sensitivities, and providing actionable, clear, sometimes tough advice to listeners grappling with difficult family dynamics.