Life Makes it Hard to Stay Sober

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Life Makes it Hard to Stay Sober"

Podcast Title: Dr. Laura Call of the Day
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Episode Title: Life Makes it Hard to Stay Sober
Release Date: July 2, 2025

---

Introduction

In the episode titled "Life Makes it Hard to Stay Sober," Dr. Laura Schlessinger engages in a heartfelt and candid conversation with a listener named Lisa. The discussion delves deep into the challenges of maintaining sobriety amidst personal turmoil, marital strain, and past trauma. Dr. Laura offers her signature no-nonsense advice, emphasizing personal responsibility, accountability, and ethical decision-making.

---

Caller’s Story and Struggles

Lisa's Background: Lisa introduces herself as an alcoholic who has been in recovery since 2020. She shares a history of growing up in an alcoholic family and being a functional alcoholic throughout most of her adult life. Her alcohol use stemmed from severe anxiety, which became unmanageable, leading her to relapse.

Marital and Financial Challenges: Lisa discusses the complexities of her marriage, highlighting a lack of financial control and discovering significant actions taken by her husband without her knowledge. These revelations trigger panic attacks, making it difficult for her to maintain her sobriety.

---

Dr. Laura’s Perspective on Relapse and Problem-Solving

Personal Responsibility: Dr. Laura addresses the core issue of relapse, emphasizing that falling back into alcohol use is a choice rather than an involuntary occurrence. She states:

"You don't find yourself relapsing. You decide to have a drink rather than handling the problem. The whole thing about an alcoholic is not handling problems."
[02:20]

Facing Challenges Head-On: She underscores the importance of confronting problems directly instead of seeking refuge in alcohol. Dr. Laura encourages Lisa to tackle her marital and financial issues proactively.

---

Handling Panic Attacks and Past Trauma

Acknowledging Panic Attacks: When Lisa inquires about the legitimacy of panic attacks, Dr. Laura shares her personal experience, illustrating resilience without resorting to substances:

"I had [panic attacks] for years. Yes, I believe. And I never... I never stopped doing everything I did. I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol."
[05:40]

Impact of Past Trauma: Lisa reveals that her mother was murdered when she was 11, a traumatic event that still affects her. Dr. Laura compassionately responds:

"The reason you drink today is you don't want to deal with the problems you have today."
[07:46]

While acknowledging the depth of Lisa's trauma, Dr. Laura maintains her stance on personal accountability.

---

Coping with Financial and Marital Issues

Financial Mismanagement by Husband: Lisa shares distressing incidents where her husband mismanaged their finances, such as spending their daughter's college fund without her knowledge, leading to significant trust issues and financial instability.

Dr. Laura’s Advice: Dr. Laura provides pragmatic solutions, advocating for legal action and separation if necessary:

"Well, then you get an attorney, take care of business, and get out of the relationship and figure out how you're going to live without a creep."
[07:08]

She emphasizes that avoiding these issues through drinking only perpetuates the problem.

---

Emphasizing Personal Control and Accountability

Overcoming Life's Challenges: Dr. Laura reiterates that regardless of past hardships, the path to sobriety and personal well-being lies in taking control of one's life:

"Somebody pushed you, you fell, you rolled because there was a tornado. Doesn't matter how you got into the hole. There's only one healthy way to get out. And it isn't to sit on the bottom and drink. It's to climb out."
[07:59]

Persistence Amidst Adversity: She acknowledges that having faced "a whole bunch of shit" makes the journey more challenging but not insurmountable:

"Today, you either drink or you solve the problem. That's what you do today."
[08:38]

---

Dr. Laura’s Reinforcement of Personal Responsibility

Throughout the conversation, Dr. Laura consistently reinforces the theme of personal responsibility. She encourages Lisa to make decisive actions to address her marital and financial issues instead of seeking solace in alcohol.

Final Encouragement: Closing the conversation, Dr. Laura motivates Lisa to take control despite the severity of her past and present challenges:

"Everybody has had crap in their lives. Some people really serious crap... But ultimately you have to take control over that."
[09:16]

She reiterates the importance of addressing problems head-on to maintain sobriety and personal well-being.

---

Conclusion

In "Life Makes it Hard to Stay Sober," Dr. Laura Schlessinger provides a forthright and compassionate dialogue with Lisa, addressing the intricate relationship between personal struggles and alcoholism. By emphasizing accountability, proactive problem-solving, and personal control, Dr. Laura offers valuable insights and actionable advice for listeners facing similar challenges. The episode serves as a poignant reminder that while life's adversities can be overwhelming, the choice to confront and overcome them lies within each individual.

---

Notable Quotes:

• "You don't find yourself relapsing. You decide to have a drink rather than handling the problem."
  — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (02:20)

• "I had [panic attacks] for years... I never turned to drugs or alcohol."
  — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (05:40)

• "Somebody pushed you, you fell, you rolled because there was a tornado. Doesn't matter how you got into the hole. There's only one healthy way to get out. It's to climb out."
  — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (07:59)

• "Today, you either drink or you solve the problem. That's what you do today."
  — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (08:38)

• "Everybody has had crap in their lives. Some people really serious crap... But ultimately you have to take control over that."
  — Dr. Laura Schlessinger (09:16)

---

This episode of "Dr. Laura Call of the Day" offers profound insights into the struggles of maintaining sobriety amid life's challenges. Dr. Laura's unwavering stance on personal responsibility provides listeners with a clear framework for addressing and overcoming their own adversities.

Transcript

[Lowes Advertiser]

Now more than ever, Lowes knows you don't just want a low price, you want the lowest price. And with our lowest price guarantee, you can count on us for competitive prices on all your home improvement projects. If you find a qualifying lower price somewhere else on the same item, we'll match it. Lowes we help you save Price Match applies the same item current price at qualifying retailers. Exclusions and terms apply. Learn how we'll match price@lowe's.com Lowest Price Guarantee.

[Dr. Laura]

Thanks for listening to my Call of the Day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5pm Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111 Lisa welcome to the program.

[Caller]

Hi Dr. Laura hi. I guess I'm ready for you to kick my butt. I am an alcoholic and have been in recovery since 2020. Grew up in an alcoholic family, was probably a functional alcoholic for most of my adult life and then kind of went off the rails. I think I used alcohol because of really severe anxiety. But anyway went into recovery in 2020 and have had a good run with it and have been active in AA and done my steps and shared meetings and all that good stuff. But I am in a marriage that is very challenging. I do not have a lot of financial control and I find out things that my husband has done that in my mind are huge without my knowledge. And what happens is I panic and I find myself relapsing.

[Dr. Laura]

And you know, you don't find yourself. That's not true. You don't find yourself relapsing. You decide to have a drink rather than handling the problem. The whole thing about an alcoholic is not handling problems. Yeah, that's the whole bit. I so instead of handling your marriage, handling the finances, making decisions in your life, handling the problems, you drink. That's what alcoholics do. That's the point of drinking alcohol.

[Caller]

But the problem that I've gotten myself into is that I don't.

[Dr. Laura]

Whatever problem you have yourself into is solvable. Instead of taking stands, making hard decisions with the challenges you're being faced, as you said, you drink. That's a decision I don't want to face. This life doesn't have to be so complicated. Walmart helps you simplify. They're your one stop shop for daily essentials like groceries, snacks, school supplies, and thanks to Walmart Pharmacy, you can count on them for your prescription needs too. Use the Walmart app to easily manage your family's medications and save time by getting prescriptions delivered right to your door. Switch your prescriptions to Walmart pharmacy delivery not available for all prescriptions and exclusions apply. Did you know that skin care can start in the laundry room? The Dr. Laura program is happy to be partnering with our sponsor. All Free Clear Laundry Detergent. My peeps with kids are especially thrilled to use it because it's 100% free of dyes and perfumes. All Free Clear is the number one laundry detergent brand recommended for sensitive skin by pediatricians, dermatologists and allergists. For a clean you can feel good about, all you need is All Free Clear.

[Fidelity Representative]

Hey Fidelity, how can I remember to invest every month?

[Dr. Laura]

With the Fidelity app, you can choose a schedule and set up recurring investments in stocks and ETFs.

[Fidelity Representative]

Oh, that sounds easier than I thought.

[Dr. Laura]

You got this?

[Fidelity Representative]

Yeah, I do. Now where did I put my keys?

[Dr. Laura]

You will find them where you left them. Investing involves risk, including risk of loss. Fidelity Brokerage Services, LLC Member NYSE SIPC.

[UPS Store Advertiser]

At the UPS Store we want to make this summer the summer of shipping Summer Shipalooza so you can start crossing items off your must ship list. Like the vintage film camera your college kid needs for class or the vase you told your mom you would send her ages ago. And with our Pack and ship guarantee, your items arrive safe or we reimburse you. So stop by your local store today for everything you need to be unstoppable. Visit theupsstore.com guaranty for full details. Available at participating locations. Most locations are independently owned. Products, services, pricing and hours of operation may vary. See center for details. The UPS Store the Be Unstoppable.

[Caller]

But do you believe that people do have panic attacks?

[Dr. Laura]

I had them for years. Yes, I believe. And I never. I never stopped doing everything I did. I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol. I had severe panic attacks for years after my husband had a sudden death experience. He didn't die, but after that I was whacked out. Never stopped working, never stopped taking care of family. Never stopped doing anything. So you went down the wrong path. That way you can try something else. But let's talk about solutions. If finances and how he handles them and the marriage and respect and not working as a team. I don't know if you've ever explained to him what you want, what you need, what you would like to do with him. I don't know that you've explained all that to him or you're just married to Genghis Khan. I mean, if you're married to Genghis Khan, get the hell out. If you just don't know how to Relate and dealing with challenges together. That's something to learn. Drinking is to avoid all of that.

[Caller]

So what tends to happen is that I will be doing well, and all of a sudden he will. Like he evidently took my daughter's college fund and spent it and without my knowledge.

[Dr. Laura]

Well, then you get an attorney, take care of business, and get out of the relationship and figure out how you're going to live without a creep. Or you drink and come up with other excuses like you don't know what a panic attack is. Yeah, I do. You think you're going to die. That's how mine went. My chest felt like it got emptied out of air and I was going to die right then and there.

[Caller]

So. Okay, can I. So. So my mother was murdered when I was 11.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. Lisa, I'm sure I don't know what to do with all these horrible things, but the reason you drink today is you don't want to deal with the problems you have today.

[Caller]

No, but my question for you is, do you think that.

[Dr. Laura]

That I'm not going to answer it? Not going to answer it. Not going to answer it. Because it really doesn't matter if it contributes to how you drink or decisions you make. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter how you fall into a hole. Somebody pushed you, you fell, you rolled because there was a tornado. Doesn't matter how you got into the hole. There's only one healthy way to get out. And it isn't to sit on the bottom and drink. It's to climb out.

[Caller]

I guess.

[Dr. Laura]

Yes, You've had a whole bunch of shit. I got it. Today, you either drink or you solve the problem. That's what you do today. No matter what happened, anytime in your life, does it make it harder? Absolutely. Still have to crawl out of the hole.

[Caller]

Okay, so. Okay, so if I. So, for example, when these kinds of things happen financially that I'm not allowed.

[Dr. Laura]

Ma' am, I'm not going to go through them. They're happening all the time. Which means you want to sit around and wait for the next one, or do you want to get an attorney and deal with the problem? If I know every 20 minute a shoe is going to drop on my head, I move my number. 1-800-375-2872. Got some lines open. Fill them up so I have somebody to nag. 1-800-375-2872. That was an important call. Everybody has had crap in their lives. Some people really serious crap. And yes, it impacts how you think and feel about things. And even behave. But ultimately you have to take control over that. Is it harder when you've had a lot of serious crap in your life to take control over that? Yes. And Your point is? 1-800-375-2872. Check out my social media on Facebook and Instagram. I post stories, photos and videos seven days a week and feature some of what you sent me to. There's always something interesting going on there. You can find me at facebook.com drlaura and instagram.com drlauraprogram.

[Fidelity Representative]

USAA knows dynamic duos can save the day like Superheroes and Sidekicks or auto and Home insurance. With usaa, you can bundle your auto and home and save up to 10%. Tap the banner to learn more and get a [e-mail]. bundle restrictions apply.