Processing the Loss of a Pet

Summary

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The Dr. Laura Podcast

Episode Title: Processing the Loss of a Pet
Date: July 5, 2026
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Featured Caller: Monica

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Episode Overview

In this emotionally charged episode, Dr. Laura takes a heartfelt call from Monica, a long-time listener grappling with the loss of her beloved stray-turned-family cat, Boots. The episode centers on processing grief after losing a pet, coping with disturbing memories, the realities of nature, and finding ways to move forward after an unexpected, traumatic loss.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Monica Shares Her Story

• [02:04] Monica explains the situation: For the past ten years, Monica cared for a stray cat, Boots, who became part of her family. Recently, Boots went missing, and after reviewing security footage, Monica witnessed a coyote attacking and killing the cat.
  • Quote:

  “I saw her get attacked and killed by a coyote on the camera.”
  — Monica [03:11]

• Monica's anguish is palpable, expressing her struggle with the traumatic memory and her compulsion to watch the footage again to confirm what happened.

2. Dr. Laura’s Empathic Response and Shared Experience

• Dr. Laura responds with deep empathy, immediately advising Monica not to rewatch the traumatic video:
  • Quote:

  “Let’s not do that. Let’s not do that. Good.”
  — Dr. Laura [03:22]

• Dr. Laura normalizes Monica's grief, sharing her own painful memory of losing her Pomeranian to wild dogs, highlighting the enduring and intrusive nature of traumatic memories:
  • Quote:

  “It will never go away. Totally. Because I’d have to take a spoon and scoop out that part of your brain, which would leave probably other parts of your brain messed up. So not a plan.”
  — Dr. Laura [04:05]

  • Quote:

  “Been there, done this. It’s awful.”
  — Dr. Laura [04:37]

• She reassures Monica that while these memories are awful and persistent, they become less overwhelming with time.

3. Honoring the Pet’s Memory

• Monica reminisces about Boots’ personality, emphasizing her toughness and unique character:
  • Quote:

  “This was my sweet Boots. We called her Boots. She was a black cat with two white feet... she used to chase other outside cats away... she was a tough girl. And it’s... she met her match.”
  — Monica [05:08]

• Dr. Laura acknowledges the bond, validating the grief:
  • “That’s gorgeous.” [05:10]

4. Managing Guilt and Fear After Loss

• Monica admits she’s now hesitant to leave food outside, fearing another tragedy.
• Dr. Laura guides Monica to look at the broader perspective, gently persuading her to keep her compassionate habits and not let fear overtake her:
  • Quote:

  “Monica, I’m going to shake you now... 10 years, she didn’t get attacked by a coyote.”
  — Dr. Laura [08:52]

  • Quote:

  “Don’t start saying, ‘Oh, I’ll never put food out again because look what can happen.’ Maybe we’ll have another 10 years with another cat.”
  — Dr. Laura [09:07]

5. Moving Forward and Coping Mechanisms

• Dr. Laura shares future plans to adopt a “forest cat,” an especially resilient outdoor breed, playfully describing its tough nature.
  • Quote:

  “They’re big and they stay outside and nothing attacks them. They’re huge and can take care. It’s like having a Doberman—that’s a cat.”
  — Dr. Laura [08:31]

• Both agree on the value of moving forward—Monica promises to resume her nightly ritual of putting food out.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Rolling Memory of Trauma

“I just can’t stop this rolling video in my head.”
— Monica [03:50]

Empathy through Shared Pain

“The last thing I saw was her being shaken by the neck... I yelled and screamed and I went for a stick. And by the time I did that, it was over.”
— Dr. Laura [04:35]

On Letting Go of Guilt

“Don’t you dare look at it again. Oh, my God. No.”
— Dr. Laura [09:30]

On Life After Loss

“Maybe we’ll have another 10 years with another cat.”
— Dr. Laura [09:07]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:04] Monica introduces her 10-year relationship with Boots and recounts the loss
• [03:11] Monica admits to witnessing the attack on camera and her distress
• [04:05] Dr. Laura discusses how grief over traumatic loss never fully vanishes
• [04:35] Dr. Laura shares her own story of losing a pet suddenly to wildlife
• [05:08] Monica fondly recalls Boots’ personality and resilience
• [08:31] Dr. Laura describes “forest cats” as a possible future pet after Monica fears for outdoor cats’ safety
• [08:52] Dr. Laura reassures Monica about her caregiving choices and encourages her not to give in to guilt and fear
• [09:24] Monica agrees to keep putting food out, honoring her bond with stray animals

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Conclusion & Tone

Throughout the episode, Dr. Laura’s signature blend of warm empathy, tough love, and practical advice helps Monica—and listeners—navigate the grief process after a pet’s death. The exchange balances sorrow, loving remembrance, and a hopeful, pragmatic approach to moving forward, providing comfort and actionable wisdom for anyone facing a similar loss.

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For more advice, real-life stories, or to reach Dr. Laura, visit DrLaura.com or tune in daily on SiriusXM Triumph.

Transcript

[Dr. Laura]

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[Monica (Caller)]

Hi, Dr. Laura hi. Hi. So we've had a kind of a stray cat, but it's been around for about 10 years. Tried to get her in the house before, but she just wasn't having it. You know, she liked being outside, but she was here every night. She would take off during the day, but was here every night. Ah, that's starting last week. I didn't see her anymore. So each night I would kind of look through my cameras outside and see if she had been around while I was sleeping. And she hadn't last night. We lived near the beach, but not in an area where this normally happens. Last night I saw a coyote in my front yard. I've never seen one in my life. So I'm like Well, crap. Let me just to reassure myself, go back to the night that. The last night I saw her, because I didn't go through the cameras that night because she's always gone during the day. So the next day, I didn't question not seeing her. And I saw her get attacked and killed by a coyote on the gamer.

[Dr. Laura]

Oh, you saw it on. I'm so sorry you saw that? Oh, God.

[Monica (Caller)]

Yeah. I almost feel compelled to go back and look at it more closely to make sure.

[Dr. Laura]

Yeah, let's not do that.

[Monica (Caller)]

You know how the rats go.

[Dr. Laura]

Let's not do that. Let's not do that. Good.

[Monica (Caller)]

It's like, did she get away? Did she not get away? Of course she's not here.

[Dr. Laura]

No, she didn't get away, which is why she's not back. She's in the wild. And this is nature.

[Monica (Caller)]

That's what my husband said.

[Dr. Laura]

But you had 10. 10 years of this. That's super.

[Monica (Caller)]

I just can't stop this rolling video in my head.

[Dr. Laura]

Yeah, you will eventually, but not for a while.

[Monica (Caller)]

I hope it goes away. I mean, I just.

[Dr. Laura]

It will never go away. Totally. Because I'd have to take a spoon and scoop out that part of your brain, which would leave probably other parts of your brain messed up. So not a plan. Yeah. Well, this is awful. Terrible. I didn't see it happen. But my dog, I had a dog and Pomeranian, it was killed by these two wild dogs that came by. And the last thing I saw was her being shaken by the neck.

[Monica (Caller)]

Oh, my God.

[Dr. Laura]

And I yelled and screamed and I went for a stick. And by the time I did that, it was over. So been there, done this. It's awful. And then eventually you'll get a cat.

[Monica (Caller)]

Hey, I have other animals. We have another cat that's in the house. She's an inside cat.

[Dr. Laura]

Oh, okay.

[Monica (Caller)]

Outside in her life. And there you go. But, you know, this was my sweet boots. We called her Boots.

[Dr. Laura]

I know.

[Monica (Caller)]

She was a black cat with two white feet.

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And.

[Monica (Caller)]

And.

[Dr. Laura]

Oh, that's. That's gorgeous.

[Monica (Caller)]

So sweet. And she was tough. You know, she used to chase other outside cats away. And, you know, I mean, she was a tough girl. And it's. She met her match.

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[Monica (Caller)]

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[Dr. Laura]

Well, after I move, I intend to get a forest cat. Do you know what that is?

[Monica (Caller)]

No.

[Dr. Laura]

They're big and they stay outside and nothing attacks them. They're huge and can take care. It's like having a. A Doberman. That's a cat.

[Monica (Caller)]

That's what I need out there.

[Dr. Laura]

And moles.

[Monica (Caller)]

And outside for whatever.

[Dr. Laura]

Yeah.

[Monica (Caller)]

Or what have you. And now I'm afraid to even have food outside because.

[Dr. Laura]

Okay. Is that okay? Monica. Monica, I'm going to shake you now. 10 years. She didn't get attacked by a coyote.

[Monica (Caller)]

10.

[Dr. Laura]

So don't start saying, oh, I'll never put food out again, because look what can happen. Yeah. Maybe we'll have another 10 years with another cat.

[Monica (Caller)]

Okay.

[Dr. Laura]

Got it.

[Monica (Caller)]

I got it. Thank you.

[Dr. Laura]

Put food out.

[Monica (Caller)]

I will. Tonight, just like always.

[Dr. Laura]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Monica (Caller)]

Thank you, Dr. Laura.

[Dr. Laura]

You're very welcome. And I'm so sorry. So sorry. And don't, damn it, erase that. Don't you dare look at it again. Oh, my God. No. My number. 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course. I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.

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