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If you could hear love, what would it sound like?
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Son, can we talk about your drinking?
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Yeah, Dad, I think we should. Helping those closest to you think about their excessive drinking. Maybe that's what love sounds like. More@rethinkthedrink.com An OHA initiative introducing Fidelity Trader plus, the next generation of advanced trading from Fidelity. Customize your tools and charts and access them seamlessly across desktop, web and mobile for faster trades anywhere you go. Try the all new Fidelity Trader Plus. Learn more about our most powerful trading platform yet@fidelity.com TraderPlus investing involves risk, including risk of loss. Fidelity Brokerage Services, llc Member NYSE SIPC.
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So fear. Totally reasonable. If you let it make your decision, you're screwed. No, you're not screwed. You screwed yourself. You screwed yourself. Which is actually worse than somebody else screwing you over. You can at least blame somebody else. If you screw yourself. It's oh, God, will I survive? Will I survive on my own? Do I know how to make out my bills? Do I know how to deal with the bank? Do I know how to deal with my credit cards? Do I know how to deal with the car? I'm 10 years a widow, but last weekend was the first time I took a car in my life for an oil change. Went to Jiffy Lube. Can't say enough good things about them. I wish they were a sponsor and I could cavell about them every day. Look into that. I really was crazy about it. It was like being in Japan, whole bunch of people closed in on the car because they do everything. They check all your fluid levels for everything. You have air in your tire. They just, like locusts come in. And then when they're done, which happens so fast, I mean, your windshield. They put water in the windshield. Stuff. They did all kinds of stuff. And as I was going to my car, one after another, sort of in a line like I was in Japan, because this would happen, because they're taught to be very respectful and responsible. And one after another, thank you for coming to Jiffy Lube. I hope you're satisfied. 1. It was like eight of them doing that. And I thought, I'm going to move in here. These are the nicest people. It's like I'm going to adopt them all. This is family. But you get a divorce and somebody's been doing all of this for you. Remember when my husband was alive? I'd pull into the garage and he'd go, is there gas in your car? And I said, there must be. I pulled into the garage. That was my answer. I never took care of the Now. I'm good at all of this. I can put gas in my car, and I know which gas. I'm good at it now. Okay, can you survive? Can you do all these things? The answer is yes. But you have to learn how to do them. I remember the first time I learned to put gas in the car. Seriously, that's men's work. I've got a manicure. Gas is not good for your manicure. I was so thrilled, especially since I learned the nozzle gizmo thing. You pull this little lever and you don't have to keep squeezing it. You learn. So all the survival stuff, you learn how to write checks. You learn how to do whatever it is. You learn how to cook. You learn how to plunge a toilet when. Oh, dear, water's coming up. Glad I only peed. Whoa. You learn everything. What's so bad about that? Look at all the more talent and skills you have. Of course, you can also be somewhat embarrassed. Maybe you're the first one in your family to have a relationship that somebody bailed out of. That doesn't mean all the relationships in your family were any good. Not everybody leaves bad relationships, okay? Some people tolerate a certain level of not so great for many reasons. Like early on, having little kids, you can feel that your damaged goods. Is anybody going to want me? That I came from a failed relationship? Sure. All you have to do is blame it totally on your spouse, on your ex. Spouse. Easiest way to get around that. I was an ideal spouse. He or she, they were terrible. Some realistic things that have to be dealt with in a different way. Some of you have been connected to really nutty. Anywhere from nutty to violent. Nutty, creepy, crappy people who will retaliate. They'll tell everybody within three miles lies about you. You know, you have to. That happens. I'll grant you, that's a bitch to deal with. My answer to that is, quite frankly, people who really know you and know the situation, they know you. So there might be some retaliation. If the person is very violent, then you can get a restraining order as part one. But restraining orders are a piece of paper. If the person really is violent, you got to get your ass out of there and be discreet as to where the hell you are. So, yeah, there are some really truly scary things to deal with. Person might be very manipulative. At a time when you're already nervous you're never going to find anyone to love you again, that's a good manipulation. The answer to that is okay, that's your comeback. Okay. I mean, I think I covered a lot of turf. Oh, yeah. And some of you have called me women. Your mommy and daddies want you to stay. Just work it out. That's because they don't want you to come home. Okay. So don't think that's actually a good reason. My number, 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars. And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform.
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Episode: Top Reasons People Stay In Bad Relationships and My Response to the Psychobabble
Date: November 3, 2025
Host: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
Platform: SiriusXM, DrLaura.com
Dr. Laura tackles the pervasive issue of why people remain in unhealthy relationships, providing her candid critique of popular psychological explanations—especially the concept of “low self-esteem.” She blends personal anecdotes, sharp humor, and direct advice to cut through what she calls “psychobabble,” focusing on actionable and practical truths over vague pop-psychology narratives.
Timestamp: 03:00 – 04:40
Timestamp: 04:45 – 06:10 & 08:35 – 11:50
Dr. Laura identifies fear—not just self-esteem—as the primary reason people remain or even enter into poor relationships.
Fears cited include:
Quote: “The biggest reason... people don't get out of bad relationships—sometimes marry when they know it's a bad relationship—just fear. ... Just fear of everything.” (04:55, Dr. Laura)
Quote: “You cannot go through life hiding behind fear and expect a quality existence.” (05:20, Dr. Laura)
She distinguishes between healthy caution and paralysis by fear:
Timestamp: 08:35 – 11:50
Dr. Laura shares personal stories about learning new skills after her husband’s death (e.g., car maintenance), using humor and humility to reassure listeners they can adapt:
She stresses that adult life requires developing new competencies, and that doing so builds confidence.
Timestamp: 11:50 – 13:50
Dr. Laura addresses the shame or embarrassment of being “the first” in the family to divorce, and the mistaken assumption that staying means the relationship was “good.”
She mentions the challenge of leaving manipulative, “nutty” or even violent partners, acknowledging the real dangers and advising practical steps:
Timestamp: 13:30 – 13:53
This episode is classic Dr. Laura—direct, wry, and pragmatic. She urges listeners to move beyond excuses and face the practical and emotional realities of ending a bad relationship, all while sharing personal stories and doling out her signature “tough love.”