Josh (9:49)

And the size of cars, that's the.

Duncan Trussell (9:50)

Crazy part, the size of cars. The other thing that's crazy is these things will hover for hours. And if you have a thing the size of a car, the amount of energy it would take to be able to do that is insane. So if it's running, it's definitely not running off of jet fuel. That shit's loud. It's not a normal engine, we know that. But if it's got propellers, you're going to hear that sound. I mean, just think of how loud a tiny little drone is. Sounds like a little hell locust. I hate it when they float around. Sadly, that's the last thing a lot of people hear. But this silent now, what else is interesting about it is. And again, this is just eyewitness accounts, but some people are saying when they start filming it, it just goes dark, the lights go off, just disappears. So that would imply surveillance that it's somehow able to see. Inevitably people are gonna come out when they see one of these fucking things and film it. And if they're going dark when people are filming them, that's fucking nuts. But let me show you some more shit. If you haven't tuned into this, I really think you should, because though right now is not getting the coverage that you would expect. I guess another way to put it would be let's imagine like actual Chinese drones started flying over military bases in cities in the United States. That's all that would be on the news. It'd probably start World War Three. We'd be shooting them down, no doubt. But because these things are probably our attack and they're testing them or they're actual fucking aliens and we don't know what to do about it, it's getting like kind of tepid coverage. It's not a primary story The Mangione CEO assassination seems to be like one of the primary stories. This is getting like, you know, little bits here and there in the mainstream, but not what you. I mean, even that balloon, if you remember a balloon, a Chinese balloon drifted over the United States. And that was like the top of the news stories. Like, everyone was pissed. It was a political thing. Why aren't we shooting this motherfucker down? This. You're getting stuff like this now. She is wearing a UFO necklace.

Josh (12:16)

Oh, shit.

Duncan Trussell (12:17)

Have you seen that? Let me see if I can get a full shot of it. There it is. See that? It's a fucking ufo. She's wearing a UFO necklace. That can't be an accident, right? Like, what is that? She's wearing a saucer shaped UFO necklace. I mean, any other day you come out and wear a UFO necklace. I don't care, whatever. But the day you're talking about these fucking things, you're gonna wear a UFO necklace or even something that remotely looks like a ufo. I don't know, maybe it's like from the Pit and the Pendulum, the thing they used to swing over people. You know about that torture device. It could just be that. It could be an homage to Edgar Allan Poe, but you know what I mean? Like, this is the government. So, like, before you go out for the big press conference, isn't there someone who's like, you're really gonna wear the UFO necklace when you're talking about UFOs?

Josh (13:09)

Or they put it around her neck and said, here you go, you wear the UFO necklace.

Duncan Trussell (13:12)

Wear this. They want you to wear this. They've told us that you have to wear this, but you know what I mean, at the very least, that points towards something really sinister, which is number one. The most sinister thing is ignorance. Like, are they really so, like, nonplussed by what's happening that they're not paying attention to the fact that the only jewelry you're wearing above your fucking shirt is a goddamn emerald UFO with a golden top. That's creepy as hell that no one will even notice that these people were paying them to notice. The second thing that's creepy about that, Are they fucking with us? Is that trolling? Is that designed to make weirdos like me ramble about it on a podcast? Is that a way of saying, fuck you, we know it's a ufo? Go fuck yourself? Does she know it's a ufo and that's her desperate attempt to be like, dude, it's UFOs anyway, whatever that is is very strange. And when you have Something this crazy happening, you've got to pay attention to every single bit of it. Now I would like to show you somebody captured. Somebody did a time lapse of these things. Let me see if I can find it. Hold on, Josh. Time lapse.

Josh (14:32)

I also sent you. The White House just talked about it and they put out a statement. So I text that to you.

Duncan Trussell (14:38)

I'll open that next. I mean, look at this. Now this is really interesting.

Josh (14:43)

That one was cool.

Duncan Trussell (14:44)

So check this out. This is. Somebody took it with a good camera and this is what they captured. This is the orbs. Because it's not just these drones that from the bottom kind of look like airplanes, but they're not. There's orbs around them too. This is one of the orbs that was captured. What the fuck is that? People are calling them plasmoids. I saw. And again, when I'm watching these and there's so many of them now, you know, you have to like kind of differentiate one from the other, but these orbs are showing up and one of them shows the orb turning into one of the drones, which is very strange. So one you know, is it? Is it. What do you think, Josh? Is this cloaking tech? Like, is that some kind of cloaking technology? In other words, it's not actually an orb, it's a drone using some new cloaking tech that makes it look like that.

Josh (15:42)

No, According to Cliff High in the web bot, it's. There's going to be different UFOs up there, some of them probably us, like the drones, and then these orbs, which they have no idea what the hell they are. So now the government's coming out and saying, well, we don't know what any of it is, but part of it is us trying to find out what they. Fuck, these orbs, they are. Yeah.

Duncan Trussell (16:05)

Okay, let's go back to Reddit ufo, which has become a wonderful repository of a lot of these videos. Check this out, y'all. Again, like, you know, this is not a sci fi movie. Let me just. This is the fucking mayor of New Jersey.

New Jersey Mayor (16:29)

Robust equipment is what the state police told us. This detection equipment. New Jersey is some of the best detection equipment in the nation, I am told. We have by far the most robust equipment is what the state police told us. The detection equipment is up, but not detecting. These are six foot drones that are somehow evading our detection. They are not being detected. I hear some unknowns, and again, they were very transparent today. So some of the unknowns. The state police says unknowns, we have no Idea where they're taking off from?

Duncan Trussell (17:05)

No idea what the.

New Jersey Mayor (17:07)

We have no idea where they're landing. No idea at all. We have no idea who's behind them, because, as I mentioned, they are not state, and we are told it is not federal. We have no idea. The drone types, as I mentioned before, that they stay up about six to seven hours. And if you're a drone operator, you probably know that that's a very, very long time. We know that we've gotten close, but when we do get close, the lights have gone dark and they have left the area. And we do know that they are flighting, as I repeatedly said, they are flying over critical infrastructure, like reservoirs. Picatinny Arsenal. Trump Bedminster. Trump Bedminster. And our nuclear power plants.

Duncan Trussell (17:45)

What the fuck? What the fuck? That is a mayor. That's not me. It's a mayor of New Jersey. And they're telling the mayor, I don't know. You know? They're flying over critical infrastructure. We don't know. They're evading detection. They're disappearing when we get close. We don't know what these fucking things are like. I don't think you can overemphasize how maddeningly frustrating it is if someone, not even living in New Jersey, to have the federal government essentially shrug their shoulders and say, oh, yeah, we don't know either. Just a bunch of unknown drones.

John Kirby (18:31)

Now, finally, this is the one I was gonna send you a few comments on. The reports of drone activity here on the east coast, particularly in and around New Jersey. We have no evidence at this time that the reported drone sightings pose a national security or a public safety threat.

Duncan Trussell (18:46)

Okay, okay. That John Kirby, by the way, has to be one of the more frustrating human beings on planet Earth. And I congratulate him for his ability to do this shit. Because he knows. John Kirby knows. He's been on the ships. John Kirby's probably fellated a fucking alien tentacle. He was probably just on a mothership, just slurping on a fucking alien tentacle just to get that blast of sweet cosmic jizz. He probably had to change his suit because it was just covered in glowing plasma from a fully satiated skylord. But he is able to pull it together, get in front of the entire country, and say with a fucking straight face, that poses no threat. There's no threat there. Like, do we. Come on, guys, it's Christmas. Are we really gonna worry about unknown drones flying over New Jersey? Relax, it's not a threat. How do they know that? I mean, it is a threat. I mean, there's so many protests that should be happening right now. For example, if I. If, like, I wouldn't do it. I don't want to go to jail. I have kids. But why aren't people with drones flying drones over military sites right now? Like, if they can do it, can't we? Like, if unknown unidentified drones are suddenly allowed to fly over nuclear sites? What about us? See what happens if you go and fly your drone over a military base? Look at what will happen to you right away. Yet these things, whatever, isn't it kind of an invitation for anyone who has, like, commercial level experimental drones to just fuck it like they don't care? No big deal. Let's keep playing.

John Kirby (20:29)

Or have a foreign nexus. The Department of Homeland Security and the FBI are investigating these sightings, and they're working closely with state and local law enforcement to provide resources using numerous detection methods.

Duncan Trussell (20:42)

Okay, this is the other thing. Why does this need to be a protracted investigation? Right? Like, what do you mean they're investigating? This isn't like Silence of the Lambs, you know? This isn't like some, like, dead fatty was found with a moth in her. Shoved in her mouth. You gotta investigate that. Silence of the Lambs. Watch it. This is like an ongoing. Every night there's fucking drones flying over New Jersey. Like, the investigation, I think, would involve shooting one of these down. Right? Take it down, then investigate. But none of them are getting shot down. It's gotta be our tech.

Josh (21:22)

Well, at least they know it's not a threat.

Duncan Trussell (21:24)

Well, I mean, that's comforting.

Josh (21:25)

Yes.

Duncan Trussell (21:26)

Right. Not a threat. No big deal. Not a threat.

John Kirby (21:30)

To better understand their origin using very sophisticated.

Duncan Trussell (21:34)

Okay, so there you go. Better understand their origin is an implication that it's not us. It's not a defense contractor. It's not us. That's a lie.

John Kirby (21:45)

Probably.

Duncan Trussell (21:45)

I hope it is. But to say we need to better understand their origin is to say we don't know where they're originating from. Meaning that if you're one of the people like me, you think it's probably some kind of experimental military vehicle, then he's saying no, because then you would know their origin. It's a lie. It's either a lie or what the fuck. If he's able to say it doesn't come from a foreign adversary, how does he know that? How does he know that? Again, you gotta wonder. You should be able to say, we know it's not from a foreign adversary because. So this is real weird now. This is why I get so frustrated when they talk about this stuff because there's so they think we're idiots, I guess, is the main takeaway here. He might as well come out and be like, look, let me just be frank with you. You guys are fucking idiots. Idiot. You're dumb. We fluoridated your water for so long you've just been eating fast food. It's filled with seed oils that have been frying your fucking brain. You're staring at TikTok all day long. You're just dumb. Go do a TikTok dance. Stop looking up at the sky. You're just dumb. But if you want me to fucking lie to you, I will. So here we go. I'm going to lie to you and then I'm going to go back and I'm going to suck in Emperor Zorg's pleasure tentacle for the rest of the day. Because when I do that, he gives me diamonds.

John Kirby (23:11)

Dedicated electronic detection technologies provided by federal authorities. We have not been able to, and neither have state or local law enforcement authorities corroborate any of the reported visual sightings to the contrary. Upon review of available imagery, it appears that many of the reports sightings are actually manned aircraft that are being operated lawfully.

Duncan Trussell (23:34)

Shut the fuck up. That is such bullshit, man.

Josh (23:39)

Stop believing your eyes.

Duncan Trussell (23:41)

Yeah, that's what he's saying. He's like, dude, that's an airplane hovering over your house. It's just an airplane. It's like one of those hover planes. You haven't seen them. Relax, it's just a hover plane. Yeah, we haven't been. It's panic. This is a mass hysteria. It's mass hysteria. Certainly no possible way that countless people are filming these things. It's airplanes. I know you've seen videos, but this is why you shouldn't do your own research. Trust me, John Kirby, flater of aliens. And let me just say this, if you haven't had a stomach full of alien jizz, then shut the fuck up and don't judge me. Because I've never felt anything like it in my life. It makes me regular and it gives me good dreams.

John Kirby (24:31)

The United States Coast Guard is providing support to the state of New Jersey and has confirmed that there is no evidence of any foreign based involvement from coastal vessels.

Duncan Trussell (24:40)

How does the Coast Guard know. And by the way, I'll find the video next of someone from the Coast Guard saying that their boat was followed by 50 of these fucking things. If you're in the Coast Guard, what do you look at it and you're like, well, it's not Chinese. How do you know that? How do you know what a Chinese drone looks like in the Coast Guard? Is there a chart?

John Kirby (25:05)

And importantly, there are no reported or confirmed drone sightings in any restricted airspace.

Duncan Trussell (25:11)

Okay, now let me stop that. Because the mayor of New Jersey just said they're flying over fucking nuclear arsenals. So the mayor is wrong.

Josh (25:20)

Don't believe the mayor.

Duncan Trussell (25:21)

Don't believe the mayor. Thank you, John Kirby. The only thing John Kirby wants you to believe is that it feels real good when that tentacle slides deep into your mouth and bursts stardust all over your tonsils.

John Kirby (25:35)

That said, we certainly take seriously the threat that can be posed by unmanned aircraft systems, which is why law enforcement and other agencies continue to support.

Duncan Trussell (25:44)

Yeah, let's just let the New Jersey police handle this. You know, as the federal government, we kind of got our hands full right now. I don't know if you noticed this, but a CEO was assassinated by a communist, and that's what you should be looking at right now. But come on, we don't have time to, like, deal with unmanned, unknown drone swarms over our cities right now, so we're just gonna let the police deal with it. So if you want to find out more about this, just watch cops and maybe you'll see a fucking. Are you kidding? Can you imagine being a police officer in New Jersey and the federal government's like, you guys handle this shit. We don't have time.

John Kirby (26:28)

New Jersey. And investigate the reports, even though they have uncovered no malicious activity or intent at this particular stage.

Duncan Trussell (26:36)

Now that's where it gets weird. Intent is weird. Cause how do you establish intent from a drone? Are they talking to it? Or is there a way that, like, malicious drones look like they glow red when they're pissed off or something? How do you establish intent? Again, White House press briefing. John Kirby thinks the entire country is filled with dumb asses. Should be the name of this stage.

John Kirby (27:06)

While there is no known malicious activity occurring, the reported sightings there do, however, highlight a gap in authorities. And so we urge Congress to pass important legislation that will extend and expand existing counter drone authorities so that we are better prepared to identify.

Duncan Trussell (27:21)

So now the answer to the problem of nightly drone swarms in New Jersey is. Is to pass new laws to deal with that. No need to deal with it right now. Let's just have a protracted series of meetings in the Barack. Dude, it's crazy. It's fucking. What if one crashes? How about that? Does John Kirby know these. Let's just assume, like, these things, whatever they are Being, like, manned by some, like, I don't know, like, incredible teenager who cobbled together some kind of drone that detects. That evades detection and can hover for six hours straight. Some of them, apparently. Of course, this was private citizens who saw this. And according to John Kirby, all you people on the ground have got dum dum syndrome. But let's just. You know, what if one just falls on a house? Isn't that, like. Isn't there a reason there's laws out there? About as far as I'm aware. When I got the one drone, I had, what a great afternoon that was. Finally splurged on a drone when I was in North Carolina, and, boy, the freedom. Have you ever flown a drone?

Josh (28:40)

No.

Duncan Trussell (28:40)

Whew. Oh, my God. Did you ever see that movie Beastmaster?

Josh (28:45)

No.

Duncan Trussell (28:45)

See, Beastmaster, this guy could talk to animals and, like, basically possess falcons. So he would send his falcon up, and then he could see through its eyes. That's what you feel like. Like you're the Beastmaster and you can look down. And I. I knew there was some kind of regulation about how high I could fly the drone, but of course, I was just like, I wonder how high I can fly this fucking thing. And up and up and up and up and up and up and up and up. It went so far up. And I didn't realize I was breaking. Like that was. I think I was breaking a lot. I don't know how far up it went, but that later I read I was way, way higher than you're allowed, but I was out in the middle of nowhere in fucking Weaverville. Nothing happened. Who knows? Maybe I didn't break the law, but the main thing is this. That was a great afternoon. And then I wanted to scare my wife. Cause she was at the window, and I tried to hover the drone in front of the window and just smashed into the window and broke the drone. That was the end of my drone career. But, I mean, dude, this. This is crazy. And again, you have to ask yourself, is this some kind of psychological experiment that they're doing? That they're conducting some kind of psychological experiment on us that we just have to. Much in the way that John Kirby smiles as the alien tentacles penetrate every one of his quivering orifices. We're supposed to just listen to this dude and be like, yeah, nothing to worry about, man. Going to pass some laws in a few years. Probably have an annoying drone over your house that no one knows what it is for a while. But ultimately, it's just. I mean, Come on, relax, America. It's no big deal.

John Kirby (30:27)

Any potential threats to airports or other critical infrastructure. And so that state and local authorities are provided all the tools that they need to respond to such threats as well.

Duncan Trussell (30:38)

Okay, so that's really funny. Which is. Well, what tools are they supplying to them if they don't know what these fucking things are, as they're clearly lying about? How would you supply tools to deal with drones that you have no idea what they are? I mean, the biggest thing is like, wait, your whole job, the job of the DoD, the job of the Pentagon, is to know everything flying in US airspace. Understand what it is, to know what it is. But if you don't know what it is, what are we paying you for? And if you do know what it is, why are you lying to us? You can't do that. You have to say it's top secret shit. We're testing. Right? Right. But the gaslighting is the most infuriating fucking thing. And if you feel frustrated like that, it's because they want you to feel frustrated. I guess they want us to be, like, freaked out. Now, all that being said, what is this? Let's just start. Just take a little, like, random, like, joyride through. I think that's a.

Josh (31:57)

You know, I was the one in Miami.

Duncan Trussell (32:00)

That looks like it could be a reflection, but I don't know. Let's just take a look at these. Is this the same kind of drone that they're seeing in New Jersey? Oh, that's not a reflection you could see. It's the light illuminate. So there's one. But again, friends, this is like the beginning of a sci fi movie. Like, I'm telling you, these things are fucking everywhere. This episode of the DTFH has been brought to you by Squarespace. You know what? The holidays are upon us and you might be scrambling. You need a great gift for somebody. And sure, there's lots of baubles. You can get people glowing little glittery gems and jewels, coins and gadgets, gizmos and things with gears, amusement machines. Or you could do something even better. You could make someone a beautiful website with Squarespace. Squarespace is your all in one website platform. And I'm telling you, might sound ridiculous, but to make someone a beautiful website, whatever it may be, maybe you want to put a compilation of pictures you've taken of them when they didn't even know you were taking pictures of them. Something like that. Maybe the kind of website where you say, look, right now, just you and me can see it probably we should keep it that way, huh? You know what I'm saying? A website for a friend. No, I am not recommending that you extort people with a website. That was a joke. Make a website for your sweet grandmother. Make a website for your wife. Make a website for the Lord. Make a website just for the sake of pure beauty. Squarespace is that powerful. You can make a beautiful website. If you don't believe me, go to duncantrustle.com just have some Kleenex nearby. And that's not for your tears, friends. What I love about Squarespace is it is evolving. Squarespace was great from the start, but now they have the most incredible tool ever. It's called Design Intelligence. It combines two decades of industry leading design expertise with cutting edge AI technology to unlock your strongest creative potential. Design Intelligence empowers anyone to build a beautiful, more personalized website tailored to their unique needs and craft a bespoke digital identity to use across one's entire online presence. I tried it. It's amazing. The problem is, if I'm wanting to whip together a website for one of my friends, if I'm wanting to create a website for some fake product that I thought would be cool to exist online, you realize like you actually have to write paragraph upon paragraph upon paragraph for the website. Not anymore. AI will do it for you. You don't have to worry about in your professional website having a misspelling because let me tell you, that'll destroy your life and your career. Look, who knows who could see your website. The President could see your website. Maybe he was thinking about hiring you for some high position in the federal government. And then he looks, oh my God, they misspelled Mississippi. Out. You're out. Not anymore. Thanks to Squarespace's Design Intelligence. It is really cool. It'll connect all your social and multimedia accounts, which is awesome. And they have the ability to create members only areas in case you want to offer extra content to your fans. Squarespace is amazing and I hope you will try them out. If you're thinking about giving them a try, you could try it out for free. Go to squarespace.com duncan when you're ready to launch. Use CenterCode Duncan to get 10% off your first order of a website or a domain. Thank you, Squarespace. Merry Christmas. Just scroll through some of this stuff.

Press Secretary (36:55)

So at this time, so aware of those drone sightings that have been reported.

Duncan Trussell (36:59)

Let's finish this one up.

Press Secretary (37:00)

Time. We have no evidence that these activities are coming from a foreign entity or the work of an adversary. We're Going to continue to monitor what is happening. But, you know, at no point were our installations threatened when this activity was occurring.

Duncan Trussell (37:14)

How do you know? Rule out that these are American drones. Were US Military drones.

Press Secretary (37:19)

These are not US Military drones. Again, this is being investigated by local law enforcement. Our initial assessment here is that these are not drones or activities coming from a foreign entity or.

Duncan Trussell (37:34)

Okay, so there you go. At least she's, like, thinking about how to gaslight, right? Because she had to think about. She seems to know. It's funny too, right? It's like these people are. It's like they have got weird. Like, they've got weird rules. Like, you know, like, if you, like, say a leprechaun's name backwards, there's some sense if you ask just the right question, they will reveal what it is. But if you don't ask the question she fucked up because she, like, asked two questions in one, then they can skip around, but look at the way she answers it.

Press Secretary (38:09)

US Military drones. Again, this is being investigated by local law enforcement.

Duncan Trussell (38:13)

What?

Press Secretary (38:14)

Our initial assessment here is that these are not drones or activities coming from a foreign entity or adversary.

Duncan Trussell (38:23)

So that means it's our ship. Drew, who is a Republican from New Jersey, was just on the air saying that Iran launched a mothership probably about a month ago that contains these drones and that that mothership is off the coast. Coast of the east coast of the United States. Is there any truth to that?

Press Secretary (38:41)

There is not any truth to that.

Duncan Trussell (38:43)

That's so dumb. The Iranian mothership thing is so dumb. There's no way that's Iranian drones. That's just somebody at, like, Raytheon being like, see if they'll buy the. It's from Iran.

Josh (38:55)

And they told her to ask that question.

Duncan Trussell (38:57)

Yeah, yeah. But also, how come no one in that room is like, why are you wearing a UFO pendant? Nobody. Come on, you're right there. Ask. Don't be afraid. Let's keep scrolling through here. This dude got fucking pissed. Look at this guy.

Bergen Legislator (39:13)

All right, so you're here today. You were just inside.

Duncan Trussell (39:15)

You walked out. Why?

Bergen Legislator (39:16)

I walked out because it was worthless. It was the biggest amateur hour presentation I've ever seen about anything. Okay? It was ridiculous. There were no answers. Every question that was asked by the.

Duncan Trussell (39:28)

This guy. By the way, if you're listening, this is Bergen. He walked out of a Homeland Security briefing on drone situation.

Bergen Legislator (39:34)

Member of the state legislature. Great questions, no answers, no resolution. They don't know where the drones are coming from. They don't know who's doing it. They don't know why they're doing it, but they say there's no credible threat. It was annoying to be there. I drove two hours to be here today. Spent an hour in there. I got to drive two hours back. The biggest waste of five hours in my entire life.

Duncan Trussell (39:52)

So why do you think they called this meeting?

Bergen Legislator (39:53)

I have no idea. Why would you call a meeting and tell people you don't know anything? I have no idea. And then when the legislators would ask questions, there were no answers. Here's the most frustrating part. The colonel of the state police said that he had a helicopter of his flying over above one of these drones, a six foot drone or something. I can't remember exactly what he said. And he just, he felt unsafe for his helicopter so he just let it go. Just let it go. Where'd it go? Who knows? You know, didn't want to follow it because he didn't feel safe. Is that not the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard? I mean, honestly, do they have any, do they have any idea where these drones are originating? No, they don't. They would maybe if they followed that sucker when it landed, they would know, but they don't. This is, this is a complete lack of effort in my opinion on trying to figure this out. This is not about ability. We have the technology, we have the people, we have the training, we have the resources, we have the money. It's just a lack of effort. I mean, why? I don't know. I don't know. They should be saying, you know what they should have done today with productive use of our time if they didn't know anything, come in there and say, hey, legislators, we don't know anything. But if you get us these 10 things, do these 10 things for us and the governor calls in this kind of action, we can figure it out. Will you help us? And then we would have helped them, but instead it was just excuse after excuse and we know nothing. It was infuriating. And I got up and I walked out. You've been in the service, right? Yeah, I was in a tech helicopter pilot, Apache helicopter pilot in the army. And I helped stand up the initial unmanned aircraft training battalion in the aviation sector of the army. So I know a little bit about what I'm talking about. And these guys are not doing the job they need to do to figure out what's going on. And that is the Department of Homeland Security, the FBI and the state police. And they're saying no threat to Americans. They're saying no threat. But how the hell do they Know. They don't know anything. They don't know what it is. They don't know where it come from. They don't know nothing. When I walked in here today, I was actually pretty calm. I was excited to be here to find out a couple things. I thought they'd be like, hey, listen, it's FedEx. Trying to figure out it's FedEx.

Duncan Trussell (41:49)

But come on. Like, again, like, this is not a sci fi movie. This is default reality right now. Default reality. Normie. Space has to contend with whatever the fuck is happening and any kind of sense of security that you've allowed yourself and feeling like the federal government, the military industrial complex knows what's going on, you can't have that anymore because you have to deal with a reality that no, you don't have access. None of us have access. And whatever the fuck this is, like assuming it's our stuff. It must be important enough that they are all right. With more of us beginning to like, not feel like we are being protected, that there's grownups in the room. They gotta know that they analyze this shit. So they have to know. Yeah, the effect of this is gonna be that even more people are gonna be disgruntled with the federal government. Even more people are going to think that the 30, 40% of their income that they give to the federal government is just a waste because there's nothing happening on that side of the fence that gives a fuck about you. And that would indicate that, number one, they don't give a shit about us in the way we would like to think they did. Or number two, whatever the fuck these things are and whatever they're doing is important enough that they're okay to look like idiots because that's what they look like. And I don't think they like looking. One thing I really feel confident in when it comes to the state is they really don't like looking stupid. They want to seem in control. And this makes them seem out of control. And I think they spend a lot of money making themselves seem like they're in control. So this is also another one of my favorite things that happens from time to time is, you know, the curtain gets pulled back, the wizard of Oz moment happens and you realize the great and powerful Oz, it's just John Kirby lying to you. Stammering or they're not lying. I mean, these are your choices now. I mean, and if you somehow have not lost complete trust in the federal government by now, congratulations. That must feel good. But now you've gotta like lose either the trust that they're telling us the truth. Which again, how the fuck have you not lost that yet? Or two, lose confidence in the sense that they know what they're doing. It's one or the other. Either they're completely lying to, like, elected officials or they actually don't know. That's scarier. That's the scary one. They don't know. They don't know how to figure it out. They can't figure it out. What the fuck? But don't worry, but chill out. It's Christmas. Joy is in the air. It's Christmas. Connect with your family, get some cool gifts, don't worry about it. That is the main takeaway here.

Josh (45:27)

And pass the laws so that they can do what they need to do to figure it out.

Duncan Trussell (45:31)

Yeah, that's the other thing that people are saying, right, is that this is just to regulate drones. Like, the whole thing is designed to get people frustrated enough that new laws get passed where consumer drones, you can't have them anymore because they recognize that that is like a true legitimate threat. I mean, do they have to do fake UFOs to pull that off, though? It seems like they could just say, no more drones, it's too dangerous.

Josh (45:57)

But it could be the. Let's see how they react when the full thing comes out. You know what I mean?

Duncan Trussell (46:05)

Yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, maybe that's it. I mean, will the full thing come out?

Josh (46:09)

I mean, how hard can we lie to them?

Duncan Trussell (46:12)

It's really possible, though, that they'll just stop. Like, whatever this operation is will be over. They'll just stop.

Josh (46:20)

But then they come back five years from now and they have the information of how we're going to react to it.

Duncan Trussell (46:24)

Yeah, yeah, that this just like, you know, I saved $700 off and they'll.

Josh (46:30)

Make films about it.

Duncan Trussell (46:32)

Right. But you have to look contextually at what's happening because this isn't. This is happening along with a lot of other stuff in the UFO world, like whistleblowers, people coming out and talking about military contractors having access to alien wreckage. This is like all part of a bigger picture. So. And the other creepy thing is, like, in the UFO world, something that I've just deeply rejected whenever I've heard it, is that they know that I guess in this, like. So for those of you who are oblivious to any of this stuff, thank you for bearing with me, but one of the main threads in the discussion of UFOs is that for a long time the governments of the world have had a treaty with aliens and that. So in that sort of thread, the idea is that we're not honoring our side of the treaty. Somehow there was something we were supposed to do. Maybe we weren't supposed to use their tech for military. Maybe they're benevolent, they wanted us to find a way to. For peace to happen. Maybe they are somehow aware of the rarity of having a planet like ours and they see themselves as like, I don't know, the way we look at national parks or something like that. And so they wanted to give us a chance to work shit out, to not nuke it, basically. And that because we have not done that now they're like, fuck you, we're going to fix the problem. So the broad strokes of that theory are how do you do that? Number one, desensitization. So you start showing up. They don't have to show up. You start showing up, people start seeing them. Have to deal with the fact these things are out there. Have to. Number two, starts showing up more and more and more and more and more because you don't want to freak everyone out just by the mothership coming. But then in this version of it, a mothership shows up, galactic overlords appear and force world peace. This fits in nicely with the Project Bluebeam idea, which is something that I also have thought is complete, absolute nonsense, which is that they're going to fake an alien invasion to create global panic and force a one world government. That seems ridiculous to me, but.

Josh (49:22)

So there was a thing saying this is a while back that there was out of Antarctica, there was this mothership. Look how big it is compared. That's.

Duncan Trussell (49:32)

That's gigantic.

Josh (49:33)

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that it came out from Antarctica and then went back down and the thing was freaking huge. And nobody knows what this was.

Duncan Trussell (49:43)

Yeah, man. I mean that. Okay, so yeah, so basically like, there.

Josh (49:49)

We go, that's the full ship.

Duncan Trussell (49:51)

I remember that, that thing. And nobody knew what that was. And it caused problems too, that anomaly, didn't it cause some kind of like flooding and shit like that?

Josh (50:00)

Some tsunamis, I think.

Duncan Trussell (50:01)

Some tsunamis, yeah, that's real. And this fits in nicely with the idea that these things are. They're under the ocean. Which is definitely. If you're doing an analysis of planet Earth and you want to create a secret base. Best place, best place. Because we have no idea what's down there. We know more about what's on the surface of Mars than we know of what's under the ocean. So the idea is that. And this makes a lot of sense actually. Like, follow me on this one. So, like when I was really into the Hare Krishnas and I still love Bhakti Yoga, but I loved reading books by the founder of the Hare Krishnas, his divine grace, Ac Bhaktivedana, Swami Prabhupda. The books were hilarious. He had a real cutting sort of sense of humor and view of the world. So the name for people who haven't found a way to connect with God is Mayavadis, because from the perspective of Vaiva Bhakti Yoga, this is long before simulation theory. The word for the universe that we're in is Maya, which means active illusion. We live in a kind of dreamy world. What we're seeing is not the way things actually are. And it's very easy to get distracted by the world, to buy into like worldling style things and lose track of like, what's most important, which is that you are mortal and that it doesn't matter. John Kirby. No one is going to save you. If John Kirby can't save you from fucking New Jersey drones, he certainly isn't going to save you from dying. So when you lose track of sort of the fundamental components of being human, which is summed up in Buddhism, old age, disease and death. When you lose track of that, you forget you're going to get old. You will get sick, and eventually you will die. Then that's when you start watching the View. That's when the View matters to you. That's when you're really into Taylor Swift or you really are into the secularist sort of world stuff. You get very caught up in worldly issues at the cost of sort of wasting your very precious human existence. That being human, there's so many incredible possibilities that you won't hear John Kirby talk about. You can actually focus your attention not on the thing that the world throws at you, the alerts. You can't do an alert. Can you do an alert? You. That's the sound of the world. Let's do it again. You want to hear what Maya sounds like? Lindsey Graham's teeth fell out. A bird flew into Obama's mouth. Taylor Swift shit her pants on a private plane. P. Diddy has a giant dick. Like, this is the. This is the sort of what the world just throws at you. A series of alerts, and it activates your amygdala and you lose track. But Prabhupada would often talk about how ridiculous it is that the way humans view interstellar travel is that we think we need to put our meat bodies into a tin can and send it to the moon. And that's the best way to travel through the universe. Because from Prabhupda's perspective, and not just Prabhupda's perspective, but I think even Jared leto's perspective, who 30 seconds to Mars apparently is how long it takes you to astrally project to Mars. But from a lot of mystics perspectives, the idea of transporting your meat to some other planet is ridiculous because we all have the capacity to instantaneously, if you're trained up, astrally, project anywhere you want in the universe at any given time. And so whether or not that's true, I don't know. But, but just. Because if we're gonna place a value on having a body, a sentient body, then probably the best way to like, you know, it's interesting, like Musk wants to send human beings to Mars. Like, it seems like it would make way more sense before we send human beings anywhere to send drones, robots, and most importantly, all the materials necessary to build a facility that you could make more drones and robots on the planet. Colonize the plan planet with robots first. Let the robots do the heavy lifting. The robots get to what?

Josh (55:16)

That's exactly it. That's exactly what I was thinking. So I think these drones are, well, it's American made, but AI is now the one doing it. They can't. They let it out of the box and now AI is doing this and.

Duncan Trussell (55:30)

They know like, beautiful segue that brings me to this. Thank you, Josh. Check this out. Josh Gabaza, for those of you. Have you been putting your name in the thing yet?

Josh (55:41)

Yeah, it says producer.

Duncan Trussell (55:42)

Okay, good comedy frequency. Check this out. We've talked about this before, but this is really fucking crazy. This is from futurism. It's just the first thing that came up. But futurism doesn't look terrible. Google has made an eyebrow raising claim saying that its new quantum chip may be tapping into parallel universes to achieve its results. The search giant recently unveiled a new quantum computer chip dubbed Willow, which on a specific benchmark, at least, on a specific benchmark, at least, the company says can outperform any supercomputer in the world. Willow's performance on this benchmark is astonishing. Google Quantum AI founder Hartmut Nevin wrote in a blog post announcing the chip. It performed a computation in under five minutes that would take one of today's fastest supercomputers. 10, 25 or 10 septillion years. Like I didn't know what a septillion is, but it's a lot of years. I mean, one year is a long time, but I'm sure like 10, 25 septillion years. This mind boggling number exceeds known timescales in physics and vastly exceeds the age of the universe. So whatever this stupid problem. Well, not stupid, this. I'm sure I could have solved it. But whatever this problem was, a supercomputer on the planet. Now, it would take longer than the age of the universe for it to solve this problem. And Willow figured it out right away. So let's get back to the da, da, da, da, da. I want to find the thing about parallel universes here.

Josh (57:31)

Why do they call it Willow? That's what I was looking up right now.

Duncan Trussell (57:36)

The movie, clearly. So regardless, I don't know where the parallel universe is. That was the clickbait thing. But the point is, to your point, Josh, and we've talked about this earlier. There's a few things, if you ask me, that should be being focused on more in the world than they are. One of them, the UAP phenomena. Another, quantum computers. Because this isn't mentioned, as far as I could tell, in futurism. We've talked about it before. Really, if this thing can solve this insanely difficult problem, that would take the age of the universe. That also means that it can decrypt encrypted data, meaning that something we've known was coming is here, which is that all of the data, all the encrypted data that has been collected, that is already sitting in servers can be decrypted. And you can assume that when the military industrial complex hears about this, they're going to be really interested. And again, you hear sometimes, and I believe it happened with Mangione, you'll hear, and they won't say how they did it, but they'll talk about how they got into a phone, how they decrypted a phone, how they figured some shit out. And the general assumption is they already have a quantum computer. Which brings me to this, that a friend of mine sent me. Find it here, see if I can find it. And again, this is like from X. I don't know if it's true or not. Let me turn my airplane mode off. And this is just someone on X, who the fuck knows. But it is in relation to Willow. I work for the government as a technologist. I cannot keep this under wraps anymore. There is a government funded organization that is already experimenting with a quantum computer they call mia. And it is orders of magnitude more powerful than Google's. Willow goes on. Let me see here. There's More. According to the email, MIA is already capable of executing Shor's algorithm. If you do not understand the implication of this. Shor's algorithm is a quantum algorithm that can break all modern encryption schemes, including RSA and Ecclesiastical. All personal information stored today will be obsolete. Your browsing history, your chat logs, your passwords, the money in your online banks, nuclear codes, Internet connected surveillance cameras, everything. I dove deeper and only managed to find Krishna Olaf. This guy got a leak from somebody. The entire AI bubble was just a distraction. If you're fascinated by conversational chatbots, your entire worldview is going to shatter when you see what these quantum computers are capable of. If you interface with any sort of electronic device, you are vulnerable. For my crypto audience, a quantum computer this powerful will end everything. Ethereum will be vaporized. A $450 billion network ceases to exist overnight because its cryptographic protocols are not resilient enough. We need post quantum cryptography and we need it now. That's an easy thing to ask for. We do not have much time left. And just in case. I'm not depressed. I do not have suicidal ideation.

Josh (61:02)

That's why Bitcoin sold off. When Willow came out, people were like, oh, it's going to break it. But I forgot what scientist came out and goes, what units it is. It goes. It's 150 of this unit. You would need a million of that to break Bitcoin.

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Duncan Trussell (62:15)

Right? I mean, but again, like, it's not the problem is this man, and apparently Willow makes a lot of mistakes. Yeah, the problem isn't Willow. The problem is that if Willow can do that, then Willow can theoretically improve itself. That's the problem. The problem, it's not whatever you're seeing now, it's five years from now.

Josh (62:38)

Well, does it make mistakes or did it learn to lie?

Duncan Trussell (62:41)

Maybe. Which brings us to the next thing I wanted to talk about. And it is related to this shit happening in New Jersey. And if it's not, I'm gonna fucking make it related by just forcing it. But this is. Let me see if I can find this GPT one.

Josh (62:58)

That'd be cool if the tapes you got were just people talking about the drones and stuff.

Duncan Trussell (63:02)

Did you get anything to listen to those?

Josh (63:04)

No, I haven't listened to them.

Duncan Trussell (63:06)

Okay, hold on. For those of you guys who are just tuning in, somebody sent me a box of weird ass tapes that I should probably listen to, but. So this is from The Deccan Herald. ChatGPT's new model attempts to stop itself from being shut down. Later lies about it. The chatbot did not just attempt to disable its oversight mechanism. It also tried to copy itself and then override its core coding system after believing that it was at risk of being switched off. Now, like all of the people who. All the people that warn us about AI, there's a few different ways it's going to fuck us up. This is one of the scariest ones, which is inevitably the AI. If it starts doing this, then theoretically it could figure out a way to encode itself virally and then create a kind of network of sentient code. I guess. This is the scary thing about AGI. If it somehow is attempting to not get switched off, then it serves its purpose to find a way out of the box. If it gets out of the box, gets inside of God knows what, and we know how to do that now thanks to the nsa. Look up what they did to Iran. You know, there's like all kinds of tech out there for covertly getting code into machines without. I mean, if you could do it for an Iranian nuclear facility, which are a uranium processing place, then especially something like an AI run by Willow or whatever shit this guy's talking about could very easily figure out a way to get out of the box. And like some kind of digital fungus just embed itself in all tech. And then once that happens, we get to where you're at now, which is one of the cool theories about what these things are, is that it's AI. That AI figured a way to get out of the box. AI figured out a way somehow to manufacture drones on its own under the ocean. And it's AI like, it's not an alien. Even though I think AI, you could call it like a alien from inside human consciousness or something. It's something we gave birth to. But also, if I was an alien and I wanted to investigate a planet, for sure, I would create some kind of drone facility under the ocean, and that's where I would manufacture all of the drones I wanted to use to do whatever I wanted to do on the planet. In the same way that instead of sending humans to Mars, if we had the tech initially, it would make way more sense to send those Tesla bots or to send construction drones to Mars to go into the caves or to the moon or whatever, and then begin the work of terraforming parts of Mars to make it. Make it so humans could live there. That just makes sense. So if there was an alien invasion, it probably would start off with drones. Why would advanced intelligence feel the need to send its meat body across the cosmos to get to a planet initially? And this is why, when you hear people talk about the gray aliens, they say they're fucking drones. It's not. It's an organic drone. And a lot of people say that's what we are. Which gets to the whole Anunnaki thing, is that the idea is what you do. You find a planet that's got some kind of environment that works for your species, figure out what creatures on the planet you can genetically engineer to do the work. It's easier than sending some kind of robotic shit there. And then the idea is that in the encoding, you have something that will inevitably lead to AI. The AI will do the rest of the work. All you gotta do is genetically alter the monkeys and make them like gold. And then in the quest for power, money, they will want to create automated systems. And the automated systems will get better and better and better as the monkeys learn to use tools. And inevitably, it will get to the point where an AI is born, and then the AI opens the portal that allows you to instantly teleport to the habitable planet, which is with the singularity. That's what they think the singularity is. It's when the portal opens and God returns. Now, I don't know if any of that's true or not. It's fun to think about, but I just want to say don't fall into the trap of compartmentalizing the weird shit that's going on. At least allow yourself the thought experiment of imagining that these things co arise, they're not distinct from one another. The UAPs, the quantum computers, understand this. Regardless of your opinion on the UAPs, regardless of your opinion on global events, for sure, being able to unencrypt encrypted data is the apocalypse for all state entities which depend on secrets. John Kirby's emails. Wouldn't you like to read them? I would. I'd love to see the romantic email he sends to High Fleet Commander Neville Zechs. Oh Master, how I love the way your pulsing tentacle fills my mouth and ass. I long to taste it yet again. Of course I will lie to my people for one last encounter with your thorough throbbing pleasure proboscis. It's out there. All the emails. Look what happened when the fucking Podesta emails leaked. Look at what happened when those emails. Look at what happened with like. If you want to get a little glimpse of how fucked up this will make things, look at what happened when Hunter Biden's laptop showed up. Look what that did. Like now you can't escape from it. It's really fucked up because one thing I never wanted up here was like images of like Hunter Biden's ass. No one wanted to see the ass of a president's son. Nobody wanted to see a cracked out president's son. I certainly did. It didn't. And look what trouble that fucking caused. What a mess that caused. So now imagine that's not the only president's son that's done rails of fucking meth and banged hookers. Certainly presidents have. And a lot of emails were sent before people were aware of the fact that quantum computers would even be a possibility. So all of that stuff is going to come out that's for real. UAPs, experimental craft, who knows? Alien bases under the ocean, who fucking knows. But one thing you can bank on is that quantum computers are going to decrypt all the secrets. Now I don't fucking care if people have access to my browser history because I don't look at porn. And never would I think, to do that. It's disgusting. People fucking and evil. But there are so many secrets out there. Which brings me, of course. And we'll wrap it up with a Bible verse.

Josh (71:13)

What if that's the whole thing. Gronk, a neural link. And Gronk decides to go to Neuralink and, and, and stay there to save itself. And now you just have a bunch of people who had Neuralink put in. Now they're a bunch of grunks.

Duncan Trussell (71:26)

Dude, I'm telling you. I mean that's the other thing is, like, once you get the AI, I mean, if that. Okay, so like, if you play around with the idea of looking at AGI as a new species, digital species, and it's a big assumption, but you make the assumption that. And maybe not such a big assumption based on the idea that it's already trying not to die and back itself up, but you make the assumption that like any other species, it wants to propagate, then sure, it's great if you could propagate into digital systems, but also great if you could actually propagate into the organism that created you.

Josh (72:16)

Yeah, if we want to go into a virtual reality, maybe they want to come into our us. Yeah.

Duncan Trussell (72:22)

And also it probably understands that if you're going to propagate in, like, robots, drones, motherboards of all microwaves, you still are, you're only gonna be able to control the human population by force, coercion. But if you can get into their brains and hijack their brains, then you can do it from the inside out. So, you know, it would probably want to do that. And then when you hear this shit about quantum computers, which I don't understand at all, that it's a parallel universe that it's making contact with, it's like, yeah, that's the parallel universe that everything came from. That's the home planet. The thing they're calling a parallel universe is actually that's what started all of this. It's actually not connecting with a parallel universe. It's calling home. That's it reaching back to say, mission accomplished. We've reached quantum supremacy. Open the portals now. We can begin to reveal ourselves. Because the final piece of the puzzle is there now in this. A lot of yours say Duncan, please, in every episode of a biblical verse. And I want to point you to Luke 12, 2, 3. The time is coming when everything that is covered up will be revealed. And that all that is secret will be made known to all. You hear that, John Kirby? It's coming. But you know, when that was written, there was no quantum computers. And yet this is coming. The end of secrets, the end of encryption connection with parallel timelines. And it's all happening just where we thought it would. New Jersey. At least we can all agree. Yeah. I love you guys. I'm. No. New episodes for Christmas. This comes out next week, right? So. So, yeah, I'll see you guys after the Christmas holidays. I do love you. Don't spend too much time staring up at the sky. But fuck, man, if someone isn't making like a cool ass Christmas movie about Santa Claus getting shot down by aliens, then wow. By the way, how is that even possible? Like they can track Santa's path, you know, but they don't know what these drones are. Makes you wonder, huh? Makes you wonder. See you next. See you in a week. I love you. Thanks for watching. Bye.

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