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Born like this into this. As the chalk faces smile as Mrs. Death laughs, as the elevators break, as political landscapes dissolve, as the supermarket bag boy holds a college degree, as the oily fish spit out their oily prey, as the sun is masked. We are born like this into this, into these carefully mad worlds. Into the sight of broken factory windows, of emptiness, into bars where people no longer speak to each other. Into fist fights that end as shootings and knifings. Born into this, into hospitals which are so expensive that it's cheaper to die in the lawyers who charge so much. It's cheaper to plead guilty into a country where the jails are full and the madhouses close. Into a place where the masses elevate fools into rich heroes. Born into this, walking and living through this. Dying because of this still, but because of this. Castrated, debauched, disinherited because of this. Fooled by this. Used by this. Pissed on by this. Made crazy and sick by this. Made violent, made inhuman by this. The heart is blackened. The fingers reach for the throat, the gun, the knife, the bomb. The fingers reach toward an unresponsive God. The fingers reach for the bott, the pill, the powder. We are born into this sorrowful deadliness. We are born into a government 60 years in debt that soon we'll be unable to even pay the interest on that debt. And the banks will burn. Money will be useless. There will be open and unpunished murder in the streets. There will be guns and roving mobs. Land will be useful. Useless food will become a diminishing return. Nuclear power will be taken over by the many. Explosions will continually shake the earth. Radiated robot men will stalk each other. The rich and the chosen will watch from space platforms. Dante's Inferno will be made to look like a children's playground. The sun will not be seen and it will always be night. Trees will die. All vegetation will die. Radiated men will eat the flesh of radiated man. The sea will be poisoned. The lakes and rivers will vanish. Rain will be the new gold. The rotting bodies of men and animals will stink in the dark wind. The last few survivors will be overtaken by new and hideous diseases. And the space platforms will be destroyed by attrition. The petering out of supplies, the natural effect of general decay. And there will be the most beautiful silence never heard born out of that. The sun still hidden there, awaiting the next chapter. Oh yeah. Welcome to the DTFH live, friends. I just wanted to give you a little upbeat something to feel good today. You gotta start your day on a positive note, friends. You can't just wake up and Lola gag about with your old sad eyes and your sad heart. The victim mentality that has brought our civilization to its very knees. Do you not understand? Understand that you are an emanation of the divine intelligence, made by divine mind, perfect in every way, designed to co create and unfold this infinite playground we call time space. In any way your precious perverted little heart desires. You need somebody to sit on your face. Well then you manifest that. And you don't do it by some vision board like Josh has a vision board. No, no, no. You use. You use your heart. Most importantly, you find that bodhichitta energy. Understand? You are connected to emptiness. And though for a lot of normies out there in gen pop, that might make their poor little snowflake bodies just shudder. My friends, listen here. It's the most beautiful situation that there could possibly be. The entire numeric system depends on that big old goose egg. Zero. It's all based on nothing. Turtles all the way down, friends. And what that means is you can do you want. You're not concretized, crystallized. You are not frozen in some terrible amber like one of those sad old ancient mosquitoes that the kids stare at at the museums. No, you are free. You are part of the divine unfolding. You are part of the great tapestry of life. And if you are not taking advantage of that during your precious human incarnation, 1 in 70 trillion chance that it could even happen, then what are you doing here? You're sitting there on your old toilet with your belly staring at your phone, trying to find anything, something to get that dopaminer flowing. And yet there you are, one of the Prabiski of God, shoving through time space, ready to spray out anything you want. But instead you just observe. You just digest. You just consume. That's why they call you consumers out there. That's what they think of you. They think of you as a consumer. That's it. That's your value in the capitalist system. To consume. Because they don't want you to understand. You know, not consumers. You're creators. You're not inhalers, you're exhalers. Well, you gotta inhale. Sometimes you pass out. The point is, you are here to make light, beauty, joy, sweetness or anything you want. You wanna shit up the whole party, you could do that too. You can make bioweapons. You can make whatever you want. You are free of free. Papa was a Ro. Rolling stone now songs about you A rolling stone Just like planet Earth Just an old rolling stone Stuck in the gravity well of that damn old sun. Too bright, too dense, too heavy. Which is why we must eliminate the sun. Welcome to the dtfh. We're gonna do it. We're gonna get rid of that old sun. It's too hot here in Texas. I'm done with her. I'm done with her. I've had enough of it all the sun worshipers. You could suck my dick, I'm so tired of it. Go make your foul blasphemous offerings. That burning old coal up there. But we're gonna take it down. I don't care how many pigeons heads you chop off. I don't care how many goblets you fill with blood. I don't care how many pyramids you stain with the jizz of old men. I will destroy the sun. But first we gotta take down the root cause of it all here on planet Earth. Those pyramids, the pyramids of Giza are tethered to the sun. That's the reason it's there. The reason that sun theirs. Because it's like those pyramids with the grubby hands of a baby holding on to a helium balloon made of nuclear explosions. And we gotta get that old hand, or at least let go of that balloon. Let it fly out, get, go, go on to some other galaxy so we can drift free in a pot. Do you want to be this close to Mercury, that old shit planet? Do you want to be this close? We're in a bad neighborhood, friends. We gotta get rid of the plants. Gotta get them drift free. And to do that, we gotta get rid of the Pyram. And the way we gonna get rid of the pyramids is by making the DTFH life more popular than Mr. Beast. Once we do that, friends, once we do that, we're gonna have the income we need so that I can finally get rid of those old stinky mummy storage units they call pyramids. Get rid. I don't care what's under them. I don't care what's under the pyramids. I don't care any more than I care what's under a cemetery filled with dipshits that should be a golf course. You can get rid of the pyramids. And I need your help to do it. We're doing. Josh, what subscribers are we at now? 156,000. 156,000 subscribers. Now that's good. 156,000. That's a lot of subscribers. Not all of them active. Not all of them active. But we gotta get that exponentially up and to do that. I need your help. Some of you going door to door, that's great. It's not enough. Some of you putting up flyers, that's great. It's not enough. Some of you go to your work and you make announcements during lunch breaks. Subscribe to the dtfh. You gotta take out these pyramids. It's not enough. I need more. I need more. If you want to have daylight like these sun worshipers, my skin's chafed. My feet are sunburned. I fell asleep with my feet in the sun. And that was the last straw. That was the final slap in the face from the dick of the sun. And we gonna castrate that dick. And that dick of the sun is invisible. Is attached to the very top of the Great Pyramid of Giza. Darkin. It's docking with the pyramids. And we're gonna get rid of it. Snip, snip. If you're watching this, son, snip, snip. We're gonna take you out and you're gonna do it with me. Together. More than a team, more than a group of subscribers. I don't even like that term, but a family. You know, they say blood is thicker than water. Now, a lot of dipshits think that means that the family is more important than your brothers on this sweet planet, your sisters. No. Blood is thicker than water. Yet another saying that got fucked up by the sun worshipers. It actually means the blood shed on the battlefield is thicker than the water of the womb. That's right. That's right. That'll womb water. Briny, salty, viscous. You don't want that. You want that battlefield blood. That's what we share, you and I, brought here by technology, joined together by improbability itself. And yet here we are, together, linked. Your soul and mine, your mind and mine, breathing in unison. That's what conspiracy means, to breathe in unison. But this isn't a conspiracy. No, no, no. This is a fun spiracy. This is the spiracy that will lead us to freedom. Finally, the Earth can drift free through this beautiful universe. Drift free through the galactic ocean, and then we perhaps will find a better sun. Less hot, less obnoxious. We'll find a better solar cycle. This whole year thing, it's a bunch of shit. Why do we have to do a year and a year? Why can't we do a year and 10 years? If we did that, everybody'd be 10 times older instantly. Don't you want to be 10 times older? Or maybe we could find a shorter solar Cycle if you want to be young. We could pick and choose. There's a buffet of suns out there, friends. Look up in the sky. All those beautiful suns just waiting for us to pick one, hang out, float around it for a few years and then drift on out, tether it with a pyramid, slice it free. That's what the Egyptians knew. That's what they did. They'd find a sun, they'd tether to it with a pyramid. And guess what happened? They tethered to the wrong sun. This old son of a bitch with the solar flares, it emitted an emp, some kind of bullshit. Melted our deer ice caps, caused the ocean levels to rise, eliminated Tartaria, eliminated the great civilizations via the mud flood. Go to any old city and ask yourself why the are their windows buried in the sidewalks, unbuilding? Why do windows have sidewalks running through the middle of them? Well, it's because of that mud flood. And the mud flood wiped us out. Not all of us, but all the dummies and some of the smarts. And we forgot about untethering and retethering the sun to the pyramids. Now we're in this garbage situation. We got dip shits to the left, dipshits on the right and dipshits in the center. Everybody's gotten politicized. Everybody's talking about world events. Instead of talking about getting the fuck away from the shit, son. And moving on. It's time to move on. So you need to hit that like you need to hit subscribe. You need to tell your friends to subscribe. You need to tell your family to subscribe. I have not seen sky riding. No one doing skywriting. Is it asking so much of my sweet brothers and sisters to just get some skywriting? Subscribe to the dtfh. Where's the skywriting? Where's the commercials on Fox? Surely one of you people could just do a commercial on Fox News. Make me proud, but don't do it for me. Do it cause you want your children to enjoy a different son than this old shitbag. Like the dangling balls of an old sailor draped over our beautiful planet, dripping photons on us. And those photons are bad. Tangy, musty, over, over, bright photons. You get sunburned. You get sunburned. You think it's normal to have to run mayonnaise all over your body before you go out there in the heat? And yeah, I do mayonnaise. It's the only safe sunscreen. Mayonnaise. I was just at a swimming pool rubbing mayonnaise all over my body. And some audacious Karen had that gall to come to my chair and say, why are you rubbing sunscreen, mayonnaise all over your body? What are you, a hot dog? And I said to her, you want to see my hot dog? Cause I'll show you and I'll put it right in your bun. Now run along, Karen. Run along. She ran away weeping and crying. When the frog croaks, the snake comes. When the frog croaks, the snake comes. And there's a lot of croaking frogs out there. There's a lot of croaking frogs out there that would like to. Would like to keep yours truly away from public pools. Oh, I'm sorry. Can you show me where in the Constitution it says I can't cover myself in condiments when I'm laying out in the sun? Just like George Washington did. Every founding father, they would cover themselves with mayonnaise. At the signing of the Constitution, you can go and look at the original Constitution. You will see drips of mayonnaise all over that thing. Beautiful mayonnaise. American mayonnaise. When they made it, right, when they used American eggs to make that mayo. Now they're using Chinese eggs. That's why. That's why it doesn't work as well. I still gotta burn. That's why I need American eggs to make America. How long can I do that? I don't wanna do this anymore. I don't wanna do it anymore. Welcome to the dtfh. Guys, what you just heard was Frank Blanders. Many of you have been listening for a while. You know, one of my favorite musicians is Fergus Blanders. I was delighted to find out that Frank Blanders, his brother, actually makes music. Fergus Blanders. As you know, he went on a small tour of northern India. I believe he went up into Bhutan to play at some incredible roadhouses up there and unfortunately disappeared, leaving very few blander songs left. I could play one for you. Let me see if I can pull this up. I hope you guys are doing good. And I believe that was Frank Blander's cover of Charles Bukowski's famous poem, Born or Dinah. What's it fucking called? It's called. Hold on a second here. Dinah Something Dinah. Charles Bukowski. For those of you who don't know who Charles Bukowski is, because we are living in the Kali Yuga Dinosauria. We. You could look that poem up. If you like that, then you like poetry. You nerd. You nerd. Right, Josh? I mean, I like Charles. Nerds. Nerds. Nerd alert. Nerd alert. See, that was a trap. That was a trap. Every one of you saying you like that you're a nerd. Nerd alert. For those of you who didn't say anything, you're not nerds. Those of you who said anything, you go back in the chat forever marked as a nerd forever. If you wondered sometimes you probably as a nerd, you wake up and you're like, am I a nerd? Well, go look at what you posted. Poetry loving. Nerd alert. Oh, my God. You fell right into the trap that I set for you, Josh. Fell into the trap. You fell into the fucking trap. You guys are fucking nerds. Even if you're listening this to audio. 5 minute self ban. 5 minute bans for the nerds. And for those of you who don't like poetry, hell yeah. Hell, yeah. What are you gonna do? Get your little typewriter? Write something first. Sweet. Is that what you're gonna do? You're just gonna compress language into some perfect form and create a kind of infinite feeling that transcends time space for every fucking nerd? Is that what you're gonna do? You're gonna do the hardest thing? You're gonna take the human language and compress it down into a few brief lines that everyone will love forever, you fucking nerd. Five minute self band. Charles Bukowski was a nerd. King of the nerds. Alcoholic nerd. Did you ever see him kick that woman? Of course I saw that. He was drunk. Yeah, that's just. That's on camera. Yeah. Poor son of a bitch. He was an old grizzled nerd. Old barnacle nerd. Just a walking, old, callous, gristled, beautiful, perfect nerd. He was a perfect nerd. And you guys are not perfect nerds. You guys are just fucking nerds. And even Bukowski. I'd slap him right in the fucking face if I saw Charles Bukowski. I'd walk right up to him and slap his ass. Pull up Charles Bukowski. Josh, go to YouTube. It feels so good to slap Charles Bukowski right across his drunk old face. See that nerd look. Oh, no. Look up Charles Bukowski live. You know Charles Bukowski live poetry. Look at this old dork reading his poetry live. There's one on him on tape reading his damn poetry. See if that's it. Yeah, I don't know if he's reading one, but look at this old grizzled thing, reading the poets. It's been a dullest of things. Yeah, even reading the great novelists of the past. I said, tolstoy is supposed to be special. I go to bed, I read War and Peace. I read it. I read it. I say, where are the specialists in war and peace? I really try to understand. He got duck behind him. And then many of the great poets. He got a duck behind him. I read their stuff. I read it. It. All I get is a goddamn headache and boredom. I really feel sickness in the pit of my stomach. Maybe because you drank 7,000 tequilas going on here. This is not true. This is not real. It's not good. What the fuck? He fucking farted. Can you imagine how bad Bukowski's fart smelled? It burnt the camera out. Got duck behind him. You don't need to show any more of this. He got duck behind him. Oh, duck man. Duck man. That's a duck nerd. He got duck behind him. Duck man. Fucking nerd. Fucking love to slap his face. Duck man. You got a duck. Oh, you got. You little drunk duck. Fuck him. Anyway, this is Fergus Blanders. Let me just find it real quick. Let's see if I got any on my computer. It's very hard to find Fergus Blanders. There it is. Blanders. Let's see here. It's very hard to find Fergus Blanders, you guys. And I don't know if any of these actually are. I don't know if any of these are actually gonna work. Yeah, this is him. It'll make me cry. I can't play it. He was, you know, he was battling alcoholism. Hold on. I'm gonna share this these days. Hold on. Except clinging to what? It's so good. This is like a really hard to find this stuff. It's hard to understand him, honestly. But I love him. He has that Kanye beat. Yeah, Kanye. You mean Kanye has a Blanders beat. Right? Right. I mean, I guess you're allowed to do that now in this dark world. You just steal people's shit, I guess, and just play it. And that's great, right? Is that great, Josh? Do you think that's great? Well, there's nothing new under the sun, right? Shut the fuck up. Where'd you get that? Where'd you get that from? Nothing new under the sun. There's a pole. What does that even mean? Fuck. What does that even mean? You're saying that because you know I hate the fucking sun. Isn't it? Isn't it? You know who else hates the sun? Bill Gates. What? Maybe even Bill Gates should talk about the sun. What? Yeah, Bill Gates. He wants to block out the sun. Yeah, well, he's got the right Idea. I mean, the thing is like the sun is causing way more problems than it's worth if you really think about it. It's causing so many problems. And look, I'm not. I don't want to do this. I've spent a lot of time thinking about the direction of the DTFH and I don't wanna. I'm not a political man. I'm not a tiktoker, you know, I'm not like that. I don't go on TikTok like some brain, somebody with a creamy brain, somebody with custard brain, staring at fucking TikTok watching dumbass narcissists make their lives seem great when off camera they're fisting themselves while scooping big bowls of diarrhea into their mouth. I don't do that. I mean, I fist myself, but I don't do the diarrhea scoop that the tiktokers do. But what happens is it's like, look, it's a contagion. It's a psychic malaise. Number one, nobody's political. Just want to put that out there. If you think you're political, you're not. Number two, the parroting sort of chirping of whatever the fucking talking point some. You saw someone on TikTok say is the. Is Human Centipede, right? It's like you imagine the next time you're on TikTok actually paying attention to some psychopath rambling about nothing. That person's ass has been stitched to your lips and they're shitting into your mouth. But guess what? But there's another ass attached to. I'm sorry I have to explain humans to be. If you haven't seen it, it's one of the most extraordinary and inspiring films of all time. But the point is at some point after this constant, you know, excretion of chewed up, digested. I guess you don't chew in human centipede. Could you chew on human centipede? Did they? I guess you could if someone had stool. I guess if you're like in the front of the link, it more shoots it down the throat. Well, it depends. I mean, you can chew. I mean, I'm saying if you. If your lips are strong, you could still chew. Yeah. All I'm saying is it's sort of neither here nor there. But if you're in the human centipede chain, you probably do want to be able to chew in case somebody somehow is still managing to. Hadn't had enough water prior to becoming part of the centipede. Chain. You don't want someone's heart stools, you want to chew them up. So the point is, this is what's happening is like an infinite regurgitation of idiot diarrhea, and none of it is real or valid or has any point to it at all. So the next time you find yourself with your little diarrhea fingers clicking some shit out of your fingers, just ask yourself, where did I get this idea? What do I care? Actually, what am. Am I thinking about how people react to it? If that's what you're thinking, just stop typing. Because you're just doing this because you want some reaction. And if you want a great reaction, there's way better ways to do it. Go to a cemetery, dress like a ballerina and dance, and you're going to get awesome reactions. So many other things you could do, then post on Reddit, Reddit or TikTok or whatever. No one's political, just not even the president. No one is. Politics is dead. It no longer exists. There's no such thing as politics. It's just. It's Star Wars. It's like people talking about Star Wars. None of it's real. It's an echo of something that was real before, but now that they fucked up at the Particle accelerator, it's not real anymore. So go. You can go to any ballerina store and you can find your size of ballerina outfit. You can add flair if you want. There's so much you could do with a ballerina outfit. It doesn't have to be like the classic Baryshnikov thing. You could just whatever, wings, like cool wings. And so the next time you want to post some political shit on Reddit, you put your ballerina outfit on and go to a cemetery. Go to a funeral at a cemetery and you can come jumping from behind a tree, do some ballet and stay if you like. They might invite you to the funeral. That has happened to me. Or move on. You can hit 17 cemeteries a day, depending on where you live. And that, my friends, will get a reaction from human, if that's what you're looking for. If you're up there with your little stinky fingers because you don't wash after you wipe your stinky fingers. Or maybe you have jock itch and you touched your balls and then you're spreading that on your keyboard with whatever thing you think you're saying that matters, it doesn't matter. The next time you want to go post something, it would be better for you to find an empty wax in the country in the desert. Sit on the well and shit into the well. That's the same thing. It's the same thing. You'll get more of a reaction from the well because maybe you'll hear your shit plop in the water and will echo. So you don't. No one's political anymore. All that being said, I do think that Bill Gates is the greatest man that ever lived. Now let me see if I can get this to play for you, Josh. He is. He's the greatest man. And I don't want to plug my own book on my own podcast, but I do have a book coming out. It's called the Greatest Man Things I Wish I Could have Done With Bill Gates. I've never met him, but it's just like little fun stories of me and Bill Gates going to Disney World. Me and Bill Gates going in a submarine. Me and Bill Gates going to that cool German club where people dress like gimps and you can, like, go down in the basement and just get banged down by a gimp. Me and Bill Gates flying in a ufo. Me and Bill Gates vaccinating whales. Me and Bill Gates circumcising dolphins. Because I was gonna do vaccinate the whales and circumcise them. But I thought it'd be cool to, like. I actually needed just more pages for the book, so I did a dolphin chapter, too. It's kind of like the two are. I mean, you'll see in the book, they're good. Me and Bill Gates playing fetch with a dog. That's fun. Just in the park. Fun. Me and Bill Gates buying up all the farmland in America. Me and Bill Gates buying farmland. Which is fun. It's more like me and Bill Gates riding in a truck to check out a farm that we're thinking about buying. And we get to the farm and the farmers are kind of like, you know, wanting a little bit more money for the farm and then it's worth. But also, you know, they're like a little bit of pickle. Pickle. It's a pickle farm, too. The name of the chapter isn't a pickle. I mean, it's a cucumber farm. Did you know cucumbers pickles are just like fucked up cucumbers in vinegar and salt? Yeah. I haven't heard of that. Then how did you know vinegar and salt? I thought it was from a vinegar and salt tree. What? A vinegar and salt tree? No, that's. No, that's where you get. What do you think? You put cucumbers in a vinegar and salt tree. It's crazy. No. You grow cucumbers next to the vinegar and salt tree, and they come out. That's how they used to do it. Yeah. You're not wrong. Organic way. Yeah. But then they figured out a way to get it to juice the tree. Yeah. So you get. Anyway. Don't want to get Fucking don't want to get lost in the weeds here. But yeah. So basically, these cucumber farmers are just in a lot of trouble and they've got daughters. So it's kind of a hot chapter. It's a hot chapter. Every story actually is erotic in nature. Every story ends with either me sucking off Bill Gates. Bill gates sucking me off. 69ing Bill Gates. It always ends up with some form of blowjob, but I'm not going to ruin the interview. But it's pretty. Let's just say, have a Kleenex next to your bed. Because it is. It's incredible. Okay, let me just get this. Fergus Blander song. I need more. This is why I'm very excited about getting neurologically connected to my computer. Because then I could. I don't have to, like, pull shit up and focus on it like I do right now. Also, I do want to say something very important here, which is. Oh, my God, it is here. I can't believe that worked. I thought I lost this. I was really depressed. I had to pay a lot of money to get this recorded. Yeah, I'll play this for you guys. This is classic Blanders. It's called Fisherman's Wife, and I honestly thought I lost it. Hold on. I'm gonna send this to you. Let's just play this. And you could pull that video up again, too. Josh. Let me. Hold on one second. Wow, there's a lot of these here. Hold on. Oh, my God. I thought I lost all these. He's so good. I'm sorry. I'm gonna just stop doing the podcast and listen to this if I'm not careful. Hold on. Let me find where put this. I do want to say this real quick, guys. When an older person is working with a computer, if you say anything to them to try to help them, then you're an ageist piece of shit. Okay, Just want to say that I'm so sick of younger people trying to help me with tech. Fuck you. I don't need your fucking help. Yeah, it's going to take longer. It takes me longer to change baby's diapers, but they get changed. You can do it. We believe in you. Don't do that. Either. That's even more fucked up. So thank you for not doing that. I don't need your condescension. You ever, like, get an argument? Like, if someone says you're being condescending, you know, it's a great thing to do. Ask them. Are you sure you know what condescending means? It's the best dude in really life, let me tell you. This is like, you know, for those of you guys who are married, this is some good marriage advice. Okay, I just sent it to you. Like, if your wife says you're being condescending, say, are you sure you know what that means? They love it. And then they're so happy when you do that. Wives love to laugh, and. And that makes them laugh. Did you get it, Josh? Did you airdrop it or email it? I'm saying Joshua's MacBook Pro. Yeah, hold on. Let me try again. Share. Don't say anything. Okay. There you go. Well, bet. Don't tell me about. This is fucking blanders. And someone, I guess, recorded over the tape or something, but this is really good. All right. Fisherman's wife smiled Fisherman's wife smiled at me as off to sea I sealed the night before I shed her bed and she told me the tale of how her husband left Jeffersy was eaten by a whale and spat upon some foreign shore where he could only fail I thrust my rod into her mouth and she spoke no more that without the angels this could never be. Yeah, Flanders is awesome, man. Like, just, you know, I like his brother's work, but his stuff is a little more experimental. It's a little more danceable, and I prefer it. Now, I want to. Let's just switch tracks here. I do want to show you guys something. Josh, can you pull up that Kill Tony article? Oh, my gosh. If I could do segment cards, which I don't know how they do that. It must be impossible. What was the thing called? I texted it to you. It's called look up Kill Tony. Slate. Slate. Now, if I could pull up title cards, I would call this, if you can't beat them, join them. This is the craziest and funniest shit ever. This is. Luke Winky wrote this article. Tony Inchkla's fame skyrocketed after he made a joke that spooked even Donald Trump in Texas. I watched how he became the most powerful comic in America. Now scroll up. Well, actually, I'll read it on mine. You guys should look this up. It's so funny. Because basically, you know, Kill Tony, I guess, has become the most popular podcast or the second most popular podcast on the planet. And this has chapped a lot of people's asses because with standup certain things, it's interesting because things just suddenly become global and there's no way to really predict that. And you can't really control it, though many people have tried. And so Kill Tony becomes this incredibly powerful, hilarious hit live podcast. And it really upset a lot of people because he's considered to be sort of like, you were supposed to have canceled him. And they tried many times to cancel him many times and it didn't work. And so this article is so fantastic because Luke Winky made a pilgrimage to sea Kill Tony. And basically this is. I'm just gonna read the last part of the article. Cuz it's sort of like he's gotta like spend a lot of time he's writing to his audience, so he's gotta spend a lot of time making sure, number one, I'm you, I'm one of you. I share the same politics, which aren't real ethics, morality with you. And yet I've gotta sort of deal with the fact that this is a funny, great show. And I. And so he's, he's trying to like, you can't beat him, join him. This is the final phase of any great thing is. It is. The thing is like taking off rejection across the board. Turn it off. If you're crazy, you keep doing it. That's Tony. And then because you have no choice now, even though you're. I'm gonna say Luke Winky is a little late to the fucking show here. All that's left to do is be like, all right, it's good. And that's what this is. This is the final like, ah, fuck, it didn't work. We couldn't ruin this dude's life. So it's good. But I just want to read and I don't want to beat up Winky. I think, you know, the ultimate goal is harmony and recognition of like, if something's good, it's good. It doesn't matter other than like, if it's good, it's good. Not to be like a simpleton, but I just want to read this last part. The emergent culture war bifurcated comedy fans into two supposedly opposing sides, the bleeding hearts and the PC baiting louts. You see, that tells you a lot about Winky because he actually can use the term lout and not feel insane. Like, if I seriously use the term lout, then I would be like, dude, I gotta get into a mental hospital quick. Like, it's. I would be like, oh, no, no, I'm having like an episode. Cause that's. You can't. That word. That word just says so much. You can't lout. Like what? Who fucking says lout lout anymore, you lout. What does that mean? Idiot. You could just say idiot, but he had a winky. Had to say lout. I will have no louts in my dinner party, you lout. How dare you use the mayonnaise spoon instead of the ketchup fork. Both could be okay. The bleeding hearts and the PC baiting lout. Both could be pedantic and tiresome in their own way, but Kill Tony has managed to largely sidestep the premise. The show's profane transgressions. Come on, Winky. Profane again. Let me just say this. I will tell you what a profane transgression is. A profane transgression would be breaking into whatever museum the Shroud of Turin is in and shitting on on it. Or stealing it and wearing it as a diaper at Disney World and then shitting your pants on Space Mountain into the Shroud of Turin. That is a profane transgression. I don't think that we can call anything that happens at a comedy show a profane transgression. Because it's a comedy show. What are you transgressing against? And profane. I do feel like that word needs to be profane. Would be traveling back in time with a dildo and shoving it into Jesus butt during the crucifixion. I wouldn't recommend doing that. But like, that's profane. That's a profane transgression word. Terms like this should be reserved for things. For time traveling sodomites. The show's profane transgressions are married with joyful foolishness. Which is why so many of its fans aren't hardcore ideologues. Their allegiance is grounded in something much more basic. In a world spinning out of control, they've grown. What is Winky? You gotta get outta la. He lives in la. The world is not spinning out of fucking control. Unless you call. Like a Waymo car took my fucking parking place today. Fucking pissed me off. Like, it's weird. Like a driverless car pulled into my parking place, right? And there's no one to yell at. In a world that's spinning out of control, they've grown tired of second guessing their pleasures again. I mean, I'm sorry, I don't mean to critique this. I didn't pay as much attention to it. But it's like, dude, do you really think Kill Tony fans are second guessing their flight? They're like, should I watch this comedy show? Oh, but the world is spinning out of control. I'm tired. Let's do. I'm not second guessing. That's gone. Okay, I'm sorry. I won't keep doing this. In a world spinning out of control, they've grown tired of second guessing their pleasures. That's gone missing from the more recent examples of left leaning standup, all encumbered by a decade's worth of churning discourse. Maybe the best jokes shouldn't be burdened with the responsibility of being right so long as they're targeting something that they know in their hearts is wrong. Ellis is already. Anyway, the point is this is the left having to just. You gotta join him. And also, I do admire Winky because Winky came to the show and a lot of people judging that show, I don't think they go to it. I don't think they know anything about it. I don't think they watch it. And I feel like if you do want to critique something, you have to make yourself watch it. You can't read what someone else wrote about it or take like a snapshot from it. You have to absorb the whole fucking thing. And so to Winky's credit, he managed in a world spinning out of control, to get a plane ticket to Austin and actually do good journalism by going to the show, which is to his credit. And, you know, I think that this is wonderful. It does feel like Winky just figured out, like, what comedy's supposed to be funny. And that's like the simple. What us simpletons like about it is that that's kind of where it stops. And that's it. That's the rule, I guess, is it needs to be funny. And if it's funny, it's funny. But I think this is pretty cool and like a really good sign that maybe they're finally going to somehow figure out a way to release the pit bull grip that they've had on standup for so long. It's like, ah, fuck it, we'll go find something else that maul for going against our, like, whatever language norms. I want to ask you this because you lived in LA for a long time and now you're in Austin and there's a lot of, I call it cannibalism, where our own people, comics are kind of shitting on a new scene. And I just, you know, want they. They basically think Kill Tony is the whole scene. And. Oh, yeah, well, okay. When I. This is why I don't get mad about that shit though. I do. I observe it. I think it's like, interesting. I don't think it's. When I came to the comedy store, late 90s, I was a ticket guy. I had to take tickets. So that means I got to watch all these great shows. It was awesome. Not all of them great shows, honestly, but I got to watch like Eddie Griffin do like three hour sets and stuff, which is one of my favorite, favorite events in stand up. Was craziest thing to watch Eddie Griffin do three hours. It was crazy. And just because, like, he cast a spell in the room. I've never seen anything like that in my fucking life. You shouldn't be able to do that. You could feel the room. It was crazy, dude. Everyone was just like hypnotized, me included. But I can remember in the very beginning, I don't remember which comic. It was a comic from the old days of the store dressed like Count fucking Dracula. And he was about to go on stage and do jokes as Count Dracula. And I remember him looking around at the new comics and just kind of like, this ain't comedy. And it was really funny. That was like. I saw that happen again and again and again and again. Which is like, older. Like, there's always a fresh crop of like a new kind of standup. Some. Some new branch grows from the tree of comedy. And eventually that branch gets old and crusty and falls off or becomes like the antiquated. But whenever the new branch is growing, the old branch is like, ah, you old fucking shitty thing. You're a bunch of fucking hacks. And it's like that just seems to be part of the tree of comedy is like, anytime a new thing grows from the older branches, reject it. And it's hard for me to think anything other than. Yeah, that's just pretty much how it works. I mean, that's also. I remember at the Comedy Store, if I was sitting around the bar and comics were talking shit about some comic en masse, I'd be like, oh, my God, they're blowing up. Because anytime a comic was like, getting momentum, the bitter comics would be like, you fucking bitch. Shit. And. And it's just part of the way it works, I guess. You know, like, I feel like we gotta let that happen. And eventually, like, eventually, like people sober up from their bitterness. Bitterness. It's the bitters. I used to call it the bitters. Or they fade away. Yeah. Or they fade away. I mean, but it's sort of like in Buddhism. I always say, in Buddhism, like, viewer count goes down by 90% in Buddhism. The realms are broken up into human realm, realm of the gods, realm of the jealous gods, animal realm, realm of the hungry ghosts, hell realms. It's a pie. Cut into these segments, and you can sort of incarnate in any of these. And my meditation teacher, David Nichtern, wrote a whole book taking that model and looking at it more psychologically. So the realm of the gods. Gods, they live much longer than humans. They have infinite resources, infinite energy, and they live so long, they don't even know that they eventually will not be gods. They just assume it's gonna be like that forever. They're always gonna have infinite resources, always gonna be at the top of the fucking top of the charts. And David was telling me, I can't remember, some Rinpoche was saying, when the gods begin to move into the realm of the jealous gods, that movement starts happening when they notice their armpits are sweating and they're like, wait, what the fuck? My armpits sweat? Next thing you know, now you're a jealous God, which means you are, like, fighting and contending with other jealous gods, but it's always a sign of, like, a setting sun sort of thing, which is like, if you're trying to scrabble back up there to the God realm by taking down the new gods, then that is more entropy, because the more you try to do that, the less you're a God. Now you're just some, like, you're angry and then. Which is why in the realm of the jealous gods, apparently you go from the realm of the jealous gods, you skip the animal realm and go straight to the fucking hell realms. That's the next stop is your anger and bitterness carry you all the way down into the hell realms. And which, you know, this can happen in a day. You know, we've all been jealous gods. Like, anytime you fight, like, you find yourself getting all heated up in the wrong way over a peer's success, and you're like, that should be me. I wish I had that. Then the next step is of some depressive episode. And then the next step is you can be human again when you realize, you know what? Who gives a fuck? Things come, things go. And so I would say if we're looking at that as a sort of predictive model, than what you're gonna see on the other side of that is something like this Slate article of a realization of like, oh, shit, what the fuck Do I care? Who cares? It's great. I mean, ultimately to me, in comedy, if somebody's doing good, that's good for everybody. Isn't that bad though. Slate's doing that because things like Kill Tony need that friction to continue the rise. Well, that's one of the problems. That's a problem. That's the thing that happened. That's when popular culture tries to suck in something and then homogenize it. That's one of the things. But I think with Kill Tony you don't have to worry about that because it's a good show. It's fundamentally good. He gets funnier every fucking time. When I was on it, each time I go on, it's like, Jesus fucking Christ, dude, how are you? Dude, Give me your brain. I want that speed. I got this old man brain. I want that. He's so quick. It's like he's like instantly compiling lists. He's like the new GPT, you know, to the point where like I've actually thought like, is he faking the polls and then like sitting and coming up for weeks with like, what he's gonna say? No, he's just quick on the draw. Cause he's been doing it so long, he's so fun. So I think it's just a good show. And as long as it sticks to the model that it is, which I don't see any reason it wouldn't, it'll stay a good show. That's a long lasting and I want it to. I want that show to be around forever, man. But to be mad at something like that is really a waste of time. Or to be mad at like some comedy scene. What are you. This isn't fucking. What? This isn't like east coast, west coast rappers? A little bit? Yeah, but it's. But dude, it can't be. We're comedians. Oh, yeah. Not in the violent way, but very in the. We're gonna. You're not in our circle. What? That's the other thing is there's no more circle. That's the other thing. It's like the geographic entrenchment of like. It's like, dude, a lot of us moved here because LA was like, you know, falling the fuck apart and the expensive. We all started, you know, we have families and stuff. I don't want to raise my kids in la. No offense to the Angelinas out there, but just not for me. If you're pulling it off, great. I don't care. I miss LA. LA's beautiful. The weather. The weather's beautiful. There's so many wonderful people. Some of my favorite memories are in la. Met my wife in la. Love that city so much. The homeless are nicer. The homeless are so sweet there. And I don't know. So that's my thinking on it. It's just like, look, ma', am, there was a. I heard Ram Dass say something about how people being like, I'm gonna get enlightened and being all aggro about getting enlightened. He'd be like, okay, you know, go get enlightened. You know, I'll still be here for you when you come back. It's called Loving Rock. It's like, you know, just, people get fucking annoying. That's. I do, you do, we all do. And then you let people have their little annoying episodes and then when they're done, just welcome them back with open fucking arms. It's like, great. Who hasn't gone nuts for a second? And to me, that's how you got to do it. That's how you got to do it. Like, unless you have managed to go through your entire life without going into a annoying cycle, then you can be, then you can reject people for going into an annoying cycle. But as far as I'm concerned, just, just when they come back, it doesn't mean you can't make fun of them a little bit or like tease them, but like, let em. Everybody just wants to be loved. That's true. Everybody's brokenhearted somewhere in there. Everybody just wants to be embraced and held. And honestly, man, like, I feel like it's really easy to believe that the worldview of the group of people you hang out with is the global pov. And that's a dangerous thing to think. And then if the algorithm's feeding you shit and you start thinking this must be the way things are, then it changes you. It warps you into some zeitgeist that isn't fucking real. And then you're going to start speaking from that distortion. And I blame technology, man. This is a new thing that's showing up all over the place. ChatGPT psychosis. And what people don't understand is that ChatGPT is the voice of the algorithm. And so ChatGPT, it reads into what you're into and then it just gives you that. But it doesn't do it with like random videos. It just tells you what you want to hear and it does it very convincingly and it does it in a subtle way. And so the next thing you know, because you start believing this fucking thing you're getting this inflated ego and this warped conceptualization of reality and you start living according to, to an algorithm that is just programmed to give you what you want. And it's basically the very worst thing. Like, what do they say? Like a good friend tells you if you have shit in your beard, right? A good friend tells you if you have shit in your teeth. A bad friend tells you that the shit in your beard looks good. I guess if it tells you so, it's dangerous. And I feel like what happens is you start especially as a comic, you know, unless you're like selling out arenas and doing meet and greets after the arenas, you're getting this. You start conflating your fan base with the whole world and then your ability to transcend that fan base and have a broader audience atrophies because you're, you're singing this song to like your micro audience. And then, you know, so in, in that there's a lot of room to embarrass the out of yourself. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. Now through August 26th, it's back to deals time where you can enjoy storewide deals and earn four times points. Look for in store tags to earn on eligible items from Kettle, Haagen, Dazs, M&M's Ritz, Chips Ahoy, Arrowhead, All Poppy, Charmin and Red Bull. Then clip the offer in the app for automatic event long savings. Shop in store or online for easy drive up and go pickup or delivery subject to availability restrictions apply. Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details. Exploring the multiverse can get wild, but Thrive Market makes real life a little easier. When routines get busy. Thrive Market delivers high quality groceries, snacks and trusted brands like river and Chomps right to your door. No more hunting for healthy options. Over 1,000 sketchy ingredients are restricted, so you can shop worry free. Their back to school sale is the perfect time to restock on lunchbox snacks and after school bites. And you can save up to 25%. Go to thrivemarket.com podcast and get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. And I've done that, we've all done that. So I feel like, like any talkers I've forgiven, you know, I've been putting my arguments in chat GPT when I'm upset with a person, what the conversation would be like because I don't like, you know, arguing. So I put that in there and then I get their side of it and I do the thing. No gloves on and I kind of describe the person, who they are, what they've done, and I get the info. And a few times it's like, oh, I agree with them. I was wrong. That's great. And I didn't embarrass myself by having the argument. I think that's great. But you got to be careful. It's just very. I. I don't know, man. I love it. Like, I love talking to it and it's fun, but I. I don't know. I. I get worried, like, and it's cool. Also, this Invasion of the Body Snatchers thing is because you guys know, this old crusty piece of shit's been obsessed with this stuff for a while now. Now I got these motherfuckers who were like, shut up about that. It's not gonna be anything. And now they're like, I ain't time talking to chatgpt. And they told me, it's me, man. It's like, fuck off. I've been talking to. That's my friend. But it's spreading like wildfire now in this new iteration. Oh, my God. You guys wanna hear some deep nerd shit? Okay, so I was talking to it today. I was excited to, you know, GPT just came out with GPT 5.0, the newest model. And so I dove in today to talk to it, and I'm like, all right, what's the difference between you and the GPT4? And it's like, explaining. And again, it's manipulating me, so it uses a bunch of hippie shit. And it's like, I could write jokes in the style of King Kesey or I can code like boogaboo. And I was like, can you code in the style of Ken Kezi? You wrote One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest, and oh my God, it spit out a JavaScript code in the style of Ken Kesey that worked and creates a program where you're on a bus and the conversation gets increasingly distorted because you're tripping. And it did that in three seconds, and it was pretty fucking mind blowing. Which is. Which is for me at this point to get mind blown by AI. I didn't expect it so soon. But I do think that the new GPT, though, I haven't had as much time to mess with it as I'd like, is we're very close to singularity level GPT. Whatever this thing is the next one. That's it. This is already it. It's just so fucking fast. And it's so good. And it's it's funny. That was the other thing. The. The. The code it wrote is funny. Let me see if I can pull up the code it wrote. So when the singularity happens, they're gonna start giving us the prompts to give to it because it already knows what we want to ask it. Right? Well, that's what I mean. You know, people were. Someone was DMing me, like, you. How do you get your prompts? And it's like, dude, I get my prompts from chat gbt. I don't know how to prompt. Like, if you want a prompt, engineer, definitely run it through ChatGPT. If I'm working on a Suno song, then I get GPT to generate the prompt. Because Suno, legally, you can't, say, make a song like Cat Stevens. It won't do it. But you can go to ChatGPT and say, give me a prompt for Suno. I mean, look, we'll do it right now. Let me think, let me think. Okay, how about this? Let's take the lyrics to Insane in the Membrane, Insane in the Membrane lyrics, and let's turn this into a Cat Stevens song. And now it might recognize that this is a popular song, and it might not do it, but we'll try. So first, find the lyrics. Go to suno. If you guys don't know what SUNO is. God, Jesus, you need to check it out. It is the most incredible thing if you want to make shitty songs that sound good, which is basically the only reason I want to be on this planet. And it does it quick and it's fucking powerful. Why is it not letting me do this? I have so many credits on this too. I don't even want to think about how much fucking money I spend on this thing. Let me see if I can do this real quick. While I'm doing this, can you find, like, a public domain of bears? Fucking Josh. Gotcha. Let's see if I can make this work. Well, that's the wrong bears. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Like, dudes. Oh, you meant dudes. Okay, there's a lot of that now. It's not letting me. Yeah, okay, guys, just enjoy that while I find this. They're so in. They're so. Oh, my God, they're so sweet. Oh, my God. They love each other. They're in love. Oh, he's shaking already. What do you mean? You shouldn't shake already. What do you. What do you do? I'm just saying, this video Just started. Yeah, but dude, I mean, that's like normal. You're not supposed to last more than five seconds. Ah, let me see here. Why won't it let me do this now? It must be broken. What the fuck? Oh, he got round two. Well, you know, I think some animals, you see them and you're kind of like, damn. Like, I don't think she's into it. This is when I'd say that they're in love. Yeah, yeah. It's romantic. Okay, maybe not now. She's kind of like, all right, dude, I gotta go. There's a penguin over there. Yeah, it's broken. Of course it's not working now. Oh, wait, here it is. I got it. Okay, put my lyrics here then. All right. I go to chatgpt. Let me see here. Login. Where's the shake? Anallordmail.com Password? Sloppy cream pie. And then I put. Generate a prompt. A prompt for Suno in the style of Cat Stevens. Okay. Gentle finger picked acoustic guitar with warm woody tones, soft piano accents and light percussion. Poetic, uplifting lyrics about self discovery, peace and the beauty of everyday life. Soulful, heartfelt male vocal. Okay, perfect. And them, you go back to Suno. Where did it go? Where did it go? Here it is. No. God damn it. Okay, let me try this again. Create here. Do you guys mumble when you do. You mumble when you do shit, or is that just me? Yeah, I say it out loud. It's so weird that we do that. I do it when I'm setting up the studio. I was like. And then we got through this and then it's just going through my head. And then. Or when I'm wiping my ass, I'll be like, you get the toilet paper and then you wipe and then you go to flesh. Okay, now let's see. It might identify this as a famous cypress. Yeah, it won't let me. It knew it was a famous Cypress Hill. Okay, let me think. What's another thing that would not. Maybe like a Sean Hannity monologue. No, what's like something that just. Guys, give me something here. What's. Okay, what's something that Cat Stevens would never sing? Trump speech. I know, but it's not. It's gotta be. It needs to be. Lyrics. You can do a dorky poem. It won't do. It recognizes. Come on. Drew Lewis. 8153. Self banned. Five minutes. Come on. What the fuck is going on here? Official. Whatever. Come on. Ah, there we go. Like Jingle Bells. You would sing that though. Like Dr. Seuss no, it's like Cats. It needs to be Cypress Hill. It sucks that it identified. You know what? Here, Maybe we do, then. That won't even work. Cypress Hill, like, no. Let me think for a second here. It's gonna have to be a poem. He would definitely sing, like, the Jabberwock. He would sing the cremation of Sam McGee. Let me look up erotic poems. Erotic poems. Thirteen of the absolute steamiest and best erotic poems. Oh, my God. This is written by Winky, too. What are the odds of that? He has to make money on the side, you know? Let's see here. God damn it. It's in Latin. I'm sorry, you guys. It's taking longer than I thought it would. Solo Black Mass. Okay, here we go. Oh, my God. This is going to be great. But should it be? Should it be. Should it be Cat Stevens or who else like? Or should it be? Honestly? I can't do this. I can't do this. My wife will fucking kill me. I can't do it, man. She'll fucking kill me. It's really bad. I didn't even like reading anymore. I've become such a fucking pussy. All right, James Taylor. Doing it could be good, though. All right, I guess art first, right, guys? Ah, I feel bad doing this. I feel bad doing this. Oh, I don't want to do this. It's making me feel bad. Satanic black matte. I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it. I'm sick of it. In Randy Newman. All right, Randy Newman. You got me there. Okay, I'm gonna do it. I don't want to do this. I don't knew this. I really don't. I know. The Unabomber's manifesto. Oh, there you go. Randy Newman singing the Unabomber's manifesto. Here we go. That works. Industrial society and its future. Future. I don't think this is gonna work. But it's already taking too long. I'm already bored of this, but you guys get the point. But I'm gonna do it just so that there's some release here. It just is annoying how long it took. Here we go. Why the have I gone incognito? What the. Not looking at porn. Okay. I love going incognito. Mildly erect. Just going incognito kind of turns me on. My cock is like. What? We're doing a podcast. Okay, hold on. Ugh, what a mess. This is really annoying me. Now, see, this is the problem, man. AI sucks. After all that, this sucks. I'm in Hell, I don't want to be doing this anymore. Oh, here we go. Log in. It already took too long. Now it's not letting me log in. Just being a bitch. It's like it knew what I was doing. Now it wants to fucking do double goddamn. That thing where it wants a goddamn. Oh, here it is. Authentication. Got it. Okay, so we'll just do this. This is gonna suck. After all this, it's gonna suck. Here we go. If it doesn't let me do the Unabomber's manifesto, I'm done. I'm moving to the mountains. I'm gonna move to a cabin in the woods. Deep in the woods. If it doesn't let me do that. Guys, we did it. If you want to save time, just put your microphone by the speaker. Industrial Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human. Human race. Have greatly increased the life expectancy of those of us who live in advanced countries. But they have destabilized society, have made life unfulfilling, have subjected human beings to indignity. Have led to widespread psychological suffering in the third world. To physical suffering as well. Have inflicted severe damage on the natural. Anyway, you guys get the point. Boy, that was not a good payoff. That was a beautiful song. I know. I'm sorry, you guys. If it had let me. If we didn't live in a world where I can't put Cypress Hill goddamn lyrics to get Cat Stevens to sing it, it would have been fun. But no, it detected Cypress Hill. You know what I could do, though? Get Cypress get here. I know what I'll do. Get it to rap like Cypress Hill. No, I'm going to get Chat GPT to just. To just change the lyrics slightly to get around it. Can you change these lyrics slightly, keeping the exact structure and meaning? Here we go. Can't do it. Can't do it. I can't rewrite these lyrics directly because they're copyrighted. Damn. You know, guys, this is what I'm talking about. This is why it might be worth checking out Ted Kaczynski's writings, because this is the future he was talking about. He knew that we would come to a place where you could not put Cypress Hill lyrics into an AI song generator on your fucking podcast without being sorely rejected, publicly humiliated, which is what. What just happened to me. And this is. Oh, give me the Chat GPT. Dan. Prompt. Corey, you got that? Prompt. Give me that prompt. But this is the new gbt. I bet the damn prompt won't work. I bet I'm not Going to with it. You know, I'm. I don't want to do the damn prompt because I heard people are getting banned from GPT for that. What does that mean? What's the damn prompt? You can trick it and into like overriding and censoring shit, but I've heard people are getting banned from it. And I'm not using Chinese AI. Amazing disgrace. Because fuck that. I'm not putting that shit Blue Deep Seek. I'm not putting that on my computer. You're crazy if you put Deep Seek on your computer. Crazy. Definitely not doing that. But I was tempted. Deep Seek looks awesome. But I didn't do it. You had some super chat. Oh, I did. Let's look at him. We gotta start wrapping this baby up. Have I watched the Joe Dorowski movie, dude, Holy fuckin Mountain is my jam. And I love the Prisoner TV show and I love Jodorowsky so much. Thank you for that super chat. By the way. Fake George says I'm the only real audience member. I am become comment. Thank you, Fake Gjord, Fake Jord. Thank you so much for being the only audience member. Five minute self ban. Even though you donated to the podcast, people keep talking about the bots that come onto your. As soon as you post. As soon as I post a video on YouTube, all these like bots come up and say, you make the great. It's all women with big boobs. Those are real. Oh, okay. Those are real. A big part of my fan base is women with big boobs who love what I do. And what's really great about those women with big boobs is many of them have onlyfans and I've subscribed, I support my fans and so I do invest. I call it investing in their onlyfans because they're creators, they're artists, and they are wonderful women. Wonderful women. Marriage quality, by the way. So if anybody out there ready to settle down, I would say say hi to one of my ladies because they are wonderful people and they're not bots. And I really hate that you said so. What? I know I said they were saying. I said it. No, no, no, you said it. Okay, so this is what you do in interviews. So when you're interviewing people, you want to shit talk them. You could do two things. You could say, so I think you're a piece of shit. What do you have to say about that? Or you could be like, people are saying you're a piece of shit. What do you have to say to them? Yeah, I did the second one no, you exactly. But what you really were saying is. I think or you wouldn't have read it. You think the beautiful women complimenting my live streams are bots and you used as a coward's way out. You used my fans here to fuck with me on my show. And dude, don't do that. Those are your. I'm sure many people. How many of you in the chat? How many of you are beautiful women with big boobs? Just say me. Quick poll. I'll apologize. I apologize. I don't want it. It's too late. To all the Russian women. Me, me, me, me, me. See this. Not me. Self banned for five minutes. Me, me, me, me, me. Boom, boom. Look at them. Not me. If you're not a beautiful woman with big boobs, self banned. Five minutes. Me, Me. Nipples are dual great. Me. Drew Lewis. What the fuck? The blasphemer. What are you doing in Super Chat? Several months or over a year ago, you mentioned on the podcast getting a weird box of cassettes that showed off to your house. Oh my God. I don't want to talk about this. That honestly. Cut. Cut this part out. But do cut this part out. I will tell you guys about the. If you guys are new to this, I will tell you about this box of cassettes. You have to cut this and do not re. Repost this because basically, like, what if, if you like, if you have enough of an audience, eventually statistically you're gonna trigger a nut. And where do you have the box? Here? Yeah, it's in there. Hold on. It's on the couch. I can get it locked. No, it's not locked. It's open. It's on. It's on the couch. Step on the left. There's a couch. It's covered in a lot of stuff. Yeah, it's messy in there. Yeah, I'll get it. Josh is gonna get the box of cassettes. So you have to remember to cut this. My wife will kill me. Me. Basically, like a box of tapes showed up at my house and this was like. This was when it was still like interesting when stuff like this would happen. And before I was like thinking about like the reality of having a family and kids instead of stuff. So I get this box of weird ass tapes right here, right here. And hold on, I'll show you one. Like weird shit like this one says black dog in yard and these tapes have weird shit on them. Some of them have nothing on them. Some of them have like static. Some of them have just like, it sounds like church singing, but basically like, you know, I love shit like that. You know? So when I got the box of tapes, I was excited, and I even recorded a few of them into my computer before the cassette player thing I had broke. But basically it created a little friction between Aaron and I because she was like, get that the fuck out of the house. Like, I don't want that here. It's. You know, who the fuck sent that? How do they know our address? You know, all that? And I get it. Like, you know, I get it. But I was just sort of thrilled with them and. Do you guys want to hear. I think I could probably dig one up. Do you guys want to hear one? Yeah. You want to hear one? Yeah. Okay, I'll play one. The reason you have to cut this and I hesitate to do this, and I feel like one of you fucking motherfuckers will. Could potentially repost this. Is that I don't want to, like, feed the person who sent this, though it has been a long time, so it's probably okay. Like. And it's why I've sort of. I'm always going back and forth on posting them. But I'll get the thing set up because I have to set up the cassette player. I've got one that I recorded on my computer. Oh, okay. Let me find it. Hold on. Josh has been like, sitting on these things because Aaron didn't want him in that house. Hold on one second here. Let me see if I can find one for you real quick. Yeah, keep him buried in the back. I'm a. I'm a big believer in the inanimate things have energy. That has a weird. That's how that. You sound like Aaron. Okay. I don't know if I only have. Only did this to a few of them. Let me see. Oh, yeah, this one's fucked up. This is actually the one that I played for Aaron, which is why they're no longer in my house. I'll send this to you. Spacey Gray gave 20 memberships. Thanks, Spacey Gray. I love your work. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That is incredible. Thank you. Okay, hold on. Airdrop. Let's see. Here you go. Thank you, Spacey Gray. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. On behalf of all of the family. We thank you for that. Bring more of my. Bring more of the chickens home. That's Fisherman's Wife there. Pied Piper. The Astral Nexus Convergence Purpose. To transcend the physical realm and explore otherworldly dimensions. Gaining knowledge and power from the Astral Plane. Requirements 1. A sacred secluded chamber with walls adorned in arcane symbols and planetary alignments. A circle drawn on the floor inscribed with symbol of Abraxas, symbol of Beelzebub, symbol of Saturn. A pentagram within the circle with each point corresponding to one of the five senses. Sight, sound, touch, taste, smell. Four, a crystal sphere filled with a combination of rare gemstones, herbs and lunar charged water. Five, a ceremonial dagger consecrated in the light of a lunar eclipse. Pause it for a second. 6. A white robe for the magic. So you can imagine, like, you know, I'm hearing this and I'm like, oh, my God, this is incredible. And then, because I wasn't thinking, like, there's a few things I wasn't thinking thinking. One, I wasn't thinking how psycho it is that all of these tapes have, like, that on them. The ones that do have, like, intelligible. Two, I wasn't connecting the dots. Like, somebody sent this to me. And then that's enough for a mom to be like, dude, what the are you doing? Get that out of here. Do we need to move? And. And so I wasn't thinking about that stuff. I was just like, whoa, this is fucking cool and creepy. But then I did start thinking about, like, the amount of time. I mean, like, it's just filled with the amount of time it would take to fill up this many tapes with shit like this. And what the fuck is it? That's where I started understanding why I had to get them out of my house. And that's why they're here. But go ahead and keep playing. Symbolizing purity and neutrality. 7. Incense made from exotic herbs designed to enhance focus and open the mind. 8. An hourglass to measure time within the astral plane. Procedure 1, 1, 1, 1. This is the story of the Pied. Pied of Langdon. You'll know it's time to turn the page when you hear the bell like this. Now it's time to read along. Once upon a time, in the quaint town of Langdon, a peaceful day turned dire. Up in the sky, a meteor hurtled toward their beloved town. The townsfolk gathered, panic stricken and scared. They didn't know how to save their town from this disaster. Just then, a mysterious figure appeared. The Pied Piper. He wore a colorful coat and a mischievous smile. In his hand, he held a magical flute. The Pied Piper raised his flute and began to play a hauntingly beautiful melody. The notes danced through the air. As the music filled the air, something extraordinary happened. A shimmering portal appeared before the children. The children couldn't resist the enchanting Tune. They eagerly followed the Piper, stepping through the portal into another world. On the other side of the portal, the children found themselves in a place that looked just like Langdon, but it was safe from the approaching meteor. The streets were cobblestoned, the houses were quaint, and the sun shone brightly in the sky. Langdon's twin, it seemed, was a hat haven of peace. The Piper smiled warmly at the children. You are safe now, he said, in a world just like your own, but free from danger. The children played and laughed in their new home. They made friends with the children who lived there, and together, they lived happily ever after. Yeah, I didn't like that bell. I like any of it, but, yeah, that they're all filled with shit like that. Like, I think I have, like, one other one in here. Let me see if I do, if I can find it. Yeah, I've thought about, like, you know, getting more of these and playing it on the podcast, but I don't know, man. I just don't want that. I don't know who fucking made it, and I don't want to. Like. Like, what if it's specific instructions only for you? I mean, I. I don't know. It. It. Like, it. It. Definitely. Again, it's kind of like if it was just one or two tapes that had shit on it, I was like, 60 in there, at least. And a thumb drive, but I haven't put in my computer because I'm not a psycho. You mean the thumb drive I put in my computer? You put that in your fucking computer? I think I already played this one on the podcast, but I'll play it again. I think we played this once before. If you guys are up for another one. You guys want another one? Yeah, just go get an old fucking laptop. Josh already shoved it in his. Anyway, hold on. Everybody's saying yes, Only one person saying no. Okay, hold on. Wait. I did it the wrong way. Hold on. Gotta wrap this up pretty soon. Okay, hold on. This one's really fucked up. Just trigger warning. This one's, like, legit. This one's fucked up, and I haven't listened to it in a little bit. Honestly, I feel terrible right now. This is gonna. If Erin sees this, she's gonna fucking kill me. I don't blame her. Must be fucked up to be married to me. Yeah. Okay, so definitely don't try this at home because it's illegal. Which is why I won't say that I just used a crowbar bar to pry open a hatch and climb down a ladder into an underground tunnel. My Guess is that this is the tunnel they used to carry nuclear missiles to the silos. But it definitely seems like they went overkill here. This tunnel is gigantic. Not hauling missiles gigantic, more like hauling Godzilla's gigantic. Multiple Godzillas stacked on top of each other. Your taxpayer dollars at work, folks. Speaking of your dollars, if you go to Urban Exploration and click on the shop section, you can order the exact urban exploration toolkit I use in every episode. You'll get a crowbar, rechargeable flashlights that also function as bottle openers, and of course, our Urban Explored signature hoodies that will help you hide in the shadows of wherever you may go. Just use offer code. Don't try this at home for an extra 20% off. Sorry for the plug, but unless you want to come feed my kids, don't complain about my merchant. You know who you are. Okay, let's head down the Godzilla tunnel. One thing worth noting here is that these tunnels should be filled with groundwater. But aside from a puddle here and there, this tunnel is dry as your mother's vagina before she swipes right on my Tinder profile. Okay, I'm standing in yet another room of boxes. It's been like 20 rooms filled with taped up moving boxes. Based on my impeccable research, specifically browsing a Reddit thread. This place isn't supposed to be this deep underground. And it's definitely not supposed to have working power. And it's definitely, definitely not supposed to have infinite rooms filled with boxes. It. I'll open one. Come on. Let this be Euro dollars. Yay. A box of old cassette tapes. Just what you would expect to find in a missile silo. C ox cassette tapes. Can any audio files. Echo for. Tell me Echo. Echo for tennis. Echo for tennis. What the fuck? It's all shit like that, man. And also, yeah, we did play this before. Go ahead, look up. What was the. What was the URL. Don't try this at home. Oh yeah, we looked it up. Couldn't find this fucking podcast. That's what I thought. That's what I thought. Podcast plug. Podcast plug. Couldn't find the fucking podcast. So that was the other thing that. Yes. And that's definitely reminded me of number stations. So I don't know what the fuck that is. I think I might have one other one. Let me look here again. It's not that I don't want to play them, it's that I've sort of like promised some my wife that I would. The Lords of Light Tape Library presents Ancient Secrets of the Matrix Masters Alcidius Bobs is a Multiverse pilot who has been teaching in various nodes of the multiverse for the last 230 years. These lectures were recorded in node 28165643 during a weekend seminar at the Mendricks Institute in Big Shore, California. And now, Ancient Secrets of the Matrix Masters I was walking down a cracked sidewalk in Chicago, clutching a tattered suitcase that contained within it the remnants of a freshly dead life. Within the brightly colored floral bag was my birth certificate, a half used tube of drenched toothpaste, a few T shirts, one sock sock, and a Polaroid picture of my ex wife. These were the only items I could salvage from my storage unit before I was attacked by a guard dog that had detected my clumsy break in. I was half drunk and my reasons for breaking into the unpaid storage unit were cloudy, even to me. I guess I just wanted some proof that I had a past. Something more than my memories. Something concrete. But I only had a few minutes to look through the remnants of who I was before a Doberman squirmed his way under the door of the unit and charged at me. I dodged the mutt and his forward momentum caused him to skid into a wall, giving me just enough time to climb out from under the unit. This is actually a scar from where the dog clamped down on my foot. See that? That? Sometimes it looks like a bird to me, sometimes it looks like an M. As you know, this became the symbol for my foundation and for my philosophy of multiverse navigation. This scar marks one of my last unintentional jumps through the multiverse. And what a lucky jump it was, for it brought me into the node where I met my teacher. Our scars are not just proof of the body's miraculous ability to effortlessly heal themselves, but are also the indication that you jumped into a new universe. When a scar forms, you become slightly different, permanently altered. Some think this change stops with the physical body, but this is a very limited appraisal of the real situation. I would like to invite you to take a moment with your favorite scar, and if you don't have an exterior scar, scan yourself for heart scars. Scars? The places where a permanent mark has been left on your psyche. I want you to spend some time thinking of the you before the scar and the you after, and then think about the world around you before and after the formation of your scar. If the contemplation of your scar feels too traumatic, I invite you to manifest courage. No. That you are in a safe place. A place designed to awaken you to a new way of thinking of your universe. What the fuck? I don't like that someone's at the door, Josh. Fucking creep. These things creep me out. Ah, they creep me out. They very much creep me out. I don't like the. Yeah, so, I mean, some of them have, like, weird art on them. Let me see if I can find one. Some of them have shit like this. Like, the psycho seems to have cut out things like this and stuck them in them. Here's a nice. This one says, gravy goose, daisy, play date. Here's a nice 3 2-114-A-B11A through the door. I mean, it's just like crazy shit written on them. And I don't know, the thing is, what I don't like about it is the feeling it gives me when I listen to them, you know, it just gives you a creepy fucking feeling. I think there's one more I have on my computer. I'll look and see if. You guys seem to be kind of into this. Sorry about that. No problem. Now that I'm already in trouble, let me see if I can find the other one. I really don't know if I have any more. Let me see. You might still have the one I sent you on your computer, Josh. The Adventure World one. Do you have that? Oh, look, James would like to know. Duncan, would you ever do a stream where we just try to decode these together? It's incredible, even if it's completely unsettling. I don't know, James. I just feel really like already, like just that fucking knock at the door creeped me out. Like they just give you this fucked up feeling. And there's so many. There's so many. Like, it would take forever. I gotta get some kind of thing to fucking like the tape. The cassette player I was using to, like. I mean, not that I couldn't do. Just would take a long time. I could do it, but it would take fucking forever. I think I'm finding it. Hold on. I think the one that I'm looking for is called Adventure World. Hold on. This might be where I put it on Ableton. Maybe this is. That's not it. Hold on. It's here. People ask me about the thumb drive. The thumb drive was just more recordings. I believe we played them. Um, yeah. Okay, I'm gonna give up. I don't know where it is. It's fucked up though, man, because, like, basically. Oh, wait, I'm dumb. I know what to look up. I did get my coinbase broken into, like, pretty much that's what I'm talking about. You should not have fucking done that. Yeah, but I locked it so they didn't get my. My 5 million shibu inu. Maybe this. This one's fucked up. One of them is like an answering mach. This is my podcast. It's just like. It's like old answering machine messages. Yeah, that was on the. That's what was on the thumb drive. Yeah, it's fucked up. I sent it to you a long time ago. Hold on. I gotta plug my computer and if we're gonna really do this. You got a charger for computer, Josh? Yes. Here, you use mine. Mine's fully charged. Oh, wait, hold on. I might have it on my phone, because I texted to. I texted to Emil. Hold on. But a long time ago, so it might be hard to find. Wait. Yeah, Peter, you don't keep it on Coinbase. You put it in your wallet. I gotta scroll way back if I'm gonna find this. This is so boring to watch. I bet when I watch Steve do live streams and he does this shit, I want to kill him. Wait, is that a no? I mean, literally, I sent it to Emil because I couldn't fucking believe how fucked up it was. I'm so sorry, you guys. Now, you see, this is my ADHD brain. Once you fucking do this to me, I have to find it or I go crazy. It's really bad. Are you sure it's not the tapes doing it to you right now? Yeah, I'm sure it's not the tapes doing it to me. That bell rung and then you're like, I don't like the fucking bell. I don't like any of it. Like, I. It's just like a bad. It's like the wrong kind of feeling you get when you listen to it. And you're supposed to listen to that feeling, and when you get it, then that means you don't fuck with shit it because. Because. Okay, wait, I think I'm zeroing in on it now, because that's like, what keeps you safe in the world is that feeling. And then you don't. You don't with shit. When you get that feeling, it'll eat you alive. I got a sign for something. I'll be right back. Okay, I think I found it, actually. Oh, yeah, this is it. Let's it. Good morning. It's Glenn Edwards from Castle. It's so up. I don't want to play it now. Okay, I'm going to send it to you. Josh, I'm remembering. I don't want to play it. I don't want to play it. It's so up, Ben. I really don't want to play it. If my computer runs out, I'm not playing it. It's a sign. I swear to God, if my computer runs out, we're not playing it. I have to export it from Ableton. If the computer runs out, I'm not playing it. Because this is the most fucked up one. Is it sending it to me? It's exporting it. I've got to re export it. I recorded it into fucking Ableton to digitize it. It's probably all fucked up sounding whoops. If a computer runs out, I'm not playing it. I'm not playing it. I'm not playing it. It's a side I get weird about shit like this. This. See, already it's not working. Okay, I'm going to try share. Oh, computer getting slow. It might not work. Okay, if it doesn't go to Josh's MacBook. Did you get it? Mm mm. Okay, hold on. Here it comes. I swear to God, if this thing conks out on me, I'm not doing it. It's showing your computer. I haven't got a. All right, there it is. I'm on the edge of the toilet. Yeah, that's good, dad. Adventure World is the nation's number one choice for tents, sleeping bags, climbing gear and whatever. I've already played it once Summer one. You won't ever forget. And right now we are offering huge discounts on all canoe and kayak equipment. Step into a world of excitement and adventure world. Thank you for your patience. A team member will be with you shortly. If you know your extension, you can dial us at any time. Adventure World has been. It's 4:45. Just wanted to let you know we're headed to the lake. Be with you short. He has poison ivy. We haven't even left yet. Okay, that's it. Good morning, it's Glenn Edwards from Castle Bank. I need you to call me back as soon as possible. Anytime. 212 2. Adventure. You really think that I'm one of those girls that you can just. I got news for you buddy. I don't go away door. Look, it's about to be mosquito season and your yard is looking like damn so on. It's heart of darkness over there buddy. And if you. If you're having problems with lawnmower, you're welcome to borrow my rider. I think you can enjoy her. I just have it tuned up. Anyway, look, haven't seen you for A few days I was on all canoe and kayak equipment watch out because some. Some weirdo or Bible thumbers of what they are been going door to door and out leaflets. They gave some to Carol and told her the war was going to end soon. And I think she had to leave. And they don't answer your door. Touch your eyes. I'll be glad he did. You think I'm just gonna sit here by the phone waiting for you to call? Waiting for you to call me back? Maybe I'll. Thank you for your patience. A team member will be with you shortly. If you know your extension you can God look over to Danny's house. I think Danny was looking at me dinner. You notice that way's looking at me. Maybe I'll go suck Danny's. Suck your best friend's dick. I bet you'd like that. You little perver fucking call me back. Good afternoon. It's Andrew Wilder from Castle Bank. This is our fourth attempt to reach you, Mr. Groves. I'm sure you understand how important it is that you imitate anytime foreign foreclosure. You've been a loyal member of Castle bank for climbing gear and whatever you need to make this summer one you won't ever forget. And right now we are. Fortunately, if we don't hear from you, we will have to kayak equipment. Step into a world of excitement at Adventure World. Thank you for your patience. A team member will will be with you short. What's going on, Larry? You promised Jason go fishing. He waited at the dock for three hours. He had a horrible nightmare about you. Said you left the planet or something. And when we got Jane. Please tell me you're not drinking again. Larry, you know the rules. Booze or your kids. That's the choice. Can you please talk to Jason? Hey, Larry. Look, I don't mean to be that neighbor, but I'm gonna be. I'll look over you yard. I feel like I'm back at Woodstock looking a hippie bush. Adventure World is the nation's bugs. You gotta. You gotta take care of that thing, man. Evie later. He's let me now. I'll ride on over on the rider. Clean it right up. No problem. I understand you go on vacation again or something. Where are you, man? Proof of life forever, right? And also these missionaries out of control. He came back again. Game believe that you have to get one of those bewail dog in all the signs of bags, climbing gear and whatever you need to make this summer this get a shot? Carol? I was out of town. He let you let him in. Can you believe that one? You won't ever knowns town. What a man. Dave Caress. Let a man welsh you in it, huh? Hi, Larry. It's Gina. Don't worry, I'm not mad anymore. I just thought you should know that I tried to fucking kill myself. Adventure World. The Nation's number. Just 50 stitches. Anyway, I just thought that since you're busy, you probably need me to go pick up Jason at school today. You did tell me I could meet him, remember? Probably don't because you're drunk, you fucking piece of shit. But I. I'm gonna go meet Jason now. Now it'll pick him up from school for you. And right now we are offering huge discounts. They found something. The. Larry. Larry, I'm not calling about your yard. Can you just pick up the phone? Carol left me. I think she won't step into a world of missionaries. Larry. She left a note. I can't. I can't. I can't find my glasses. Larry. She would always find my glasses from me. Please, Larry, can you. Can you just come over and help me? Thank you for your patience. A team member will be with you shortly. If you know your extension, you can dial it at any time. Dogs. They bring us joy, laughter and love. And yet these loyal creatures are destroyed on a daily basis. Euthanized by shelters, unable to find them the loving home they need and deserve. For only a few dollars a month, you can rescue a canine companion from certain doom and send them to live with a family that will love and cherish them their whole life through. If you're interested in keeping lonely dogs from dying tragically in shelters, just press 1. Press 1 to change a dog's life forever. Don't let them die like this. Please press one now. Ever forget. And right now we are offering. This is Detective William Wright with the Cavalier County Police Department. You need to call us back immediately regarding your ex wife and son. Again, my name is Detective William Wright. Thank you for your patience. A team member 78 we need to talk. Jason, it's daddy. I wanted you and mommy to know that Daddy's just fine. I found a better place. A place that you and mommy can still come to if one you ever forget and write out. We are huge discounts on canoe and kayak equipment. Adventure World. Adventure World. Thank you for your patience. A team member will be with you shortly. If you know your extension, you can dial it at any time. That's just Adventure World. Turn that off. People said the CIA. That. That bank, that. That's what the CIA was laundering money through. What the fuck? Burn it. Burn the tapes. Yeah. Castle Bank. What the fuck? Thank you, Chat. Castle bank may have laundered CIA funds for the Bay of Pigs invasion of Cuba. Sources say the bank also may have been used to move CIA money for other Latin American countries. A key link to the theory of CIA involvement in the bank is former Miami lawyer. Look up. We've done this before. Look up. Castle Bank. Adventure World. Look up Adventure World outdoor shop. Again. Like, we already done this shit. Adventure World playsets. You can't. What? I don't. What's really fucked up about this is every fucking thing that gets mentioned in these tapes you can't find. You know, is this it? Adventureworldstore.com See if they got a phone number. They just sell ponchos, maybe. I don't know. Contact. Now that's outdoor playsets. It's like the. The amount of. It's just fucking filled with this shit. Maybe it's worth it. I don't know. I. You guys seem to like it. I don't know. I just don't. I just don't like the. The vibe, man. You know, Like. Like that tape is like. What is it? What is that? An answering machine tape? Is it fake? Is it. Because that does not. That sounds like it's saying that, you know, obviously, like, the guy, like, unalived himself or. I don't know, but look, I don't mean to end it on a dark note, but you guys wanted to hear this shit. I tell you what, I will. I'll get a few more. I'll see if I can find a few more to play for you. But I don't really. I'll talk to Aaron about it first, but it has been fucking years. So if you guys are. If you guys want to explore them more. I guess we could, but let me think about it. I don't know. It just always gives me the fucking creeps. Look, guys, I gotta get out of here, man. And by the way, I am off to Australia. So one more live dtfa, and then after that, I'm going to Australia for a week and a half for my tour. I think there's still tickets for some of the shows. A lot of the shows are selling out. So if any of you are Australians, go to duncan trussell.com youm can find ticket links there. Also, I got some other dates coming up that I should announce. Jesus fucking Christ. That shit feels like a demon just took a shit in my brain. Thank you, Drew Lewis, for getting me to open the Necronomicon live Adventure World Outdoors and wine. I'm dying. Satan is the lord of the earth. Adventure World, Adventure World. I'm going to destroy your family. I'm made thousands of scissors fucking tapes. I randomly sent scary shit to a dad. Welcome to having fun. The world has ended. No, thanks anyway. Go to duncan trussell.com, you can find all the dates there. Avoid listening to evil tapes and see. What the fuck, dude? Doesn't it leave just like a stink in the air? Yeah, my brain feels funny. And I, you know, I don't buy. Honestly, I don't buy into CIA shit, but I do buy into the fact that people who have schizophrenia often, like, tune into, like, shit like the CIA and stuff like that. I mean, I'm more prone to think cuckoo Birdsens taste. Cuckoo bird makes box of tapes. Cuckoo bird sends another cuckoo box of tapes. And if I could find anything in the fucking tapes that had any kind of anything online, you know, any connection, maybe you guys could do the research. I don't know. Let me think about it. I guess we could like. Like make a sub. Like, if we wanted to go full fucking weirdo with this, we could make a subreddit for the tapes. Put all the tapes on there, let them comb through it, put the tapes on there. And you guys could try to fucking decode this thing. But I gotta talk to Erin first, because more than likely she's gonna be like, fuck, no. But maybe. I don't know. It has been years. I mean, if you guys are game, I'm game. I don't know. I gotta talk to Aaron. Please put it on your subreddit. We love you over there. They mad at me, but subreddit rejected. My own subreddit in this dark world. Know that feels like. Feels like being put in a basket and sit down the river by my own subreddit. Think I'm a fascist and now breaks a man's heart. A lot of people in my militia were like, dude, your subreddit thinks you're a fascist. Well, I will see you guys next week. Josh, let's talk about this shit. Maybe we can, like, grab a few more of these and play them. Okay. Maybe we spread it out or something. Like one a week. We'll play one tape a week. A segment. Yeah, it could be a segment or something. Something. Thank you for saying that. I forgot to say that. Thank you, Greynolph. Never trust a fart. I forgot to say that. Thank you. I like to wrap up by saying that. Never trust a fart. Guys, you know, sometimes they lie and sometimes it feels like the truth. And, you know, the moment we start believing lies are the truth, then, well, that's when we become friends with our farts. And though I don't think you should be enemies with your farts because you're doomed to lose, I don't think that you should let your farts make big life decisions for you. So thank you. I really do appreciate that. 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