747: Brad Williams

Summary

Duncan Trussell Family Hour

Episode 747: Brad Williams
Date: April 19, 2026
Guest: Brad Williams

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Episode Overview

In this heartfelt and hilarious conversation, Duncan Trussell welcomes comedian Brad Williams to discuss the collision of the comedy grind, parenthood, grief, and the circus-like world of professional performance. The episode dives deep into Brad’s unique experiences—most notably his run as a headliner comic for Cirque du Soleil, performing just days after his father's death. Both comedians reflect on life on the road, the sacrifices and strange joys of raising kids as touring comics, the camaraderie and eccentricities of circus life, and the process of surviving (and even embracing) grief.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Comic’s Journey & Early Camaraderie

• Duncan and Brad reminisce about years of brief, transient backstage encounters at clubs and festivals (03:15–04:12).

  • Brad (03:37): "I will meet Duncan Trestle. It will go a different way… I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but it's an experience.”

• Both share the parental challenges of balancing careers with family life.

  • Brad (05:14): “It's a different mindset when you wake up in the morning and you go, oh, I'm not living for me. I'm living for someone else. Truly.”

2. The Realities of Comedy & Road Life

• Conversation about the grind: terrible gigs, open mics miles from home, terrible venues, and horror stories.

  • Brad (10:23): “Every comedian has these stories. We would drive, you know, 300 miles to do an open mic for no money.”

• Commentary on newcomers seeking shortcuts via shows like "Kill Tony."

  • Brad (10:46): “First of all, get in line. There’s hundreds of people every night trying to do it... Now you have to tour. Do you have more than one minute?”

3. Headlining Cirque du Soleil: Comedy Among Acrobats

Getting the Gig & The Performer’s Ethos

• Brad shares the surreal experience of being approached to headline a Cirque show (07:19–09:06).

  • Brad (09:06): “They’re like, we just want you to do you. We just want you to do stand up… And what are my content restrictions? They’re like, we’re not the comedian. You’re the comedian. Which is the best thing for a comedian to hear.”

• Quotes Buddy Hackett:

  • Brad (09:12): “Never trust anyone who’s never entered through the kitchen.”

The Challenge of a Cirque Audience

• Performing for Cirque du Soleil means audiences aren’t expecting a comic, sometimes don’t speak English, and come for spectacle, not jokes.

  • Brad (16:59): “It was almost like going back to open mics where the audience is not there for me. So I have to win them over.”

• Analogies to the hardest standup rooms, like sports bar open mics and hostile or indifferent crowds.

  • Brad (17:57): “Sports Bar open mic… That is the final boss of stand up comedy.”

• Describes going on after perilous acts:

  • Brad (19:33): “Now I’m going after two guys literally juggling each other with their feet… I gotta go on after that.”

Performing Through Grief

• Brad’s father passed away two weeks before his Cirque debut.

  • Brad (20:03): “I hear my dad’s voice going, do it, pussy. He’d want me to perform… It was the most healing, wonderful thing.”

• Unforeseen on-stage catastrophes and handling adversity:

  • Acrobat injury and on-the-fly comedic recovery (25:28):

    • Brad: “I go to the microphone and I say... How about a round of applause for Jose?... Mexicans really do do all the jobs we don’t want to do. Kills in the room. And we're back.”

  • Technical failures overcome by pure standup:

    • Brad (26:28): “Do the mic still work?... Give me a fucking microphone.” He does 10-12 minutes as crew fixes lighting, earning respect from the cast.

Circus Culture & Backstage Life

• The diverse, eccentric, and international makeup of circus performers.

  • Brad (28:50): “You got Russians performing with Ukrainians, you got Jews performing with Palestinians… It really is a micro-universe where everyone just has to figure out how to get along.”

• The unique, familial support within the Cirque ensemble, especially amidst personal loss.

Sex, Romance, and Euphoria Backstage

• Duncan notes the sexual energy backstage at Cirque; Brad confirms it’s well-known and addressed by HR:

  • Brad (37:00): “They tell you... don’t fraternize... But yeah, of course people do.”

• Brad’s “socially appropriate comment” tactic to respect boundaries backstage (38:48).

4. Grief, Life, & Becoming a Parent

• Brad shares candidly about processing grief, going through his father’s things, and the way pain can serve as a reminder of love.

  • Brad (43:24): “The grief will never go away. You’re never without it. But you don’t want to be without it... That pain is a reminder of the love that I was fortunate enough to experience.”

• Both discuss the absence of preparation for death and grieving in Western culture.

• Brad on becoming a parent and the tension of being away on the road:

  • Brad (58:03): “I'm telling her she's six. I'm going, hey, you know, daddy's got to go to work. And then she just looks up and goes ‘again.’ I'm just like, fuck this business. Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it.”

• Brian Posehn’s story of his kid’s heartbreaking response when explained that dad’s job pays for all their things:

  • Kid: “Well, I don’t need those things.” (59:26)

5. Therapy, Self-Improvement, & Comic Coping

• Brad advocates for therapy, shares reluctance and benefits:

  • Brad (62:20): “It’s made me a better father. It’s made me a better partner. Conflict resolution is... a lot better at it now.”

• They riff on happy endings and where relaxation should really happen (massage vs. DMV), and invent a slew of absurd “hand job coping devices” for stressful situations (63:23+), culminating in speculative billion-dollar “Bill Gates in the garage” sex-tech ideas.

6. The Open Mic Gauntlet, Community, and Comic Survival

• Both share battle stories from the trenches of LA open mics, benevolent hecklers, and comedy gatekeepers.

• Brad’s take on the real test for comics:

  • Brad (53:26): “If you’re a comedian, you have to do this. You don’t think about it. If you thought about it, you wouldn’t do it.”

  • Anecdote of the open mic regular:

    • Brad (55:01): “He goes up and bombs. Of course he did.”

• The importance of blissful ignorance when starting out—keeps new comics from being daunted by the odds.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Meeting Duncan:

• “I will meet Duncan Trestle. It will go a different way. I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but it's an experience.” —Brad (03:37)

On the Comedy Grind:

• “We would drive, you know, 300 miles to do an open mic or, you know, for no money.” —Brad (10:23)

On Cirque du Soleil Audiences:

• “When people go to see Cirque du Soleil, they want actors flying out of cannons going wee wee. They want that. That's what they're expecting.” —Brad (16:59)

On Grieving:

• “That pain is a reminder of the love that I was fortunate enough to experience in my life.” —Brad (43:27)
• “The grief will never go away. You're never without it. But you don't want to be without it.” —Brad (43:23)

On Comics and Therapy:

• “It's made me a better father. It's made me a better partner. Conflict resolution is... a lot better at it now.” —Brad (62:20)

On Not Fearing the Crowd:

• “But you survived that. And now nothing scares me.” —Brad (19:19, referencing bad crowds in sports bars)

On What Makes a Comic:

• “If you’re a comedian, you have to do this. You don’t think about it. If you thought about it, you wouldn’t do it.” —Brad (53:26)

On Balancing Work and Family:

• “Every comic with kids is the divorced parent that when they split custody, they're like, all right, you were with me this week. We're going to Disneyland... Because the comic comes home and I'm like, all right, we'll do all the things.” —Brad (61:13)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 03:15 – Reunion and backstory as comics/dads.
• 07:19 – Brad’s origin as Cirque du Soleil’s comic headliner.
• 16:59 – The difficulty of winning over Cirque crowds.
• 20:03 – Performing after his father’s death.
• 25:28 – The “Wheel of Death” accident and improvising in crisis.
• 37:00 – The backstage relationships and HR at Cirque du Soleil.
• 43:23 – Brad’s philosophy on grief as a mark of love.
• 53:26 – What makes a comic: “You have to do this.”
• 58:03 – The pain of leaving kids for the road (“again”).
• 62:20 – The benefits of therapy.
• 63:23+ – “Happy ending” and fleshlight riff: comic coping mechanisms.
• 68:13 – Outro and Brad’s plugs for tour and podcast.

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Conclusion

This episode is a candid, rollicking, and at times unexpectedly moving deep-dive into the unique lives of standup comedians—especially those trying to balance creativity, family, and grief. Brad Williams provides a rare glimpse into what it’s like to bring laughs to the world’s most unlikely stages, including the dazzling and demanding circus stage, all while carrying the complexities of life offstage. For anyone interested in the true grind of comedy or the behind-the-scenes reality of performance, this is essential listening.

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Find Brad Williams:

• Website & Tour Dates
• YouTube – “Live on Short Street” special
• Podcast – Height and Babble

Find Duncan Trussell:

• Show Information and Dates

Transcript

[A]

Greetings, my friends. Thank you for returning to the Duncan Trestle Family Hour podcast. And this episode is amazing. But before we get into it, I've got to do the thing. Come see me do stand up comedy, won't you? I am going to be performing, friends. Come see me do stand up comedy. I'm gonna be at the Comedy zone in Jacksonville April 23rd through the 25th. Come out there. Jacksonville, you know I'm a Brunswick boy. Come out and see me. Then I'm going back to helium in Philadelphia May 1st through the 3rd. After that, you can find me at hilarity's in Cleveland May 7th through the 9th. And then I'm coming home to the La Jolla Comedy Store May 15th through the 17th. And then after that, I'll be in Charlotte, North Carolina, at the Comedy Zone. And of course, the Wilbur is coming up June 27th. I can't wait. Come out. I'm coming back to Asheville too. You can find all my [e-mail] and finally tune in to something I've been doing. It's kind of like a new weird project. It's called the Night Stream. I've been doing these streams every night. Powerful, enigmatic, and changing the world for the better. Subscribe on YouTube, won't you? Now, today's guest. Holy fucking shit. You know, Brad Williams is a hilarious comedian. His newest comedy Special has over 7.5 million views on YouTube. It's called Starfish. Watch it. It's so funny. There's. He's mega famous, so everybody knows who Brad Williams is. But during this conversation, we talked about something you might not know about. Brad Williams. Brad Williams was the headliner comic on a run of Cirque du Soleil shows. And hearing Brad Williams talk about what it's like to open up in front of a Cirque du Soleil audience in Vegas a few days after your dad died is one of the most poignant, hilarious stories I've ever heard on the podcast. He's a brilliant, wonderful person. If you want to connect to him, go to BradWilliamsComedy. He's got an awesome podcast called Height and Babble. Also, he is a road dog. He works hard out there. He tours, and you definitely should go see him live. If he's coming to your city, I'm talking to you. Edmonton, he's going to be at the River Creek Casino. Calgary, he's going to be at the Gray Eagle Resort and Casino. Vancouver at the Vogue Theater. All his dates [e-mail] now everybody welcome Brad Williams to the DTFH. Brad, welcome to the DTFH. Man, I was so excited when your manager hit me up.

[B]

Yeah, man, you, you, you are someone where. When I see you out and I, and I see you either at the clubs or at a festival. When I saw you at Skank Fest. Yeah, it's just like, I don't care what mood I'm in, if I sit down and talk to you, I'm not saying I'm gonna be in a better mood, but I'm good. But I'm gonna be changed.

[A]

I've had se. He does the nicest or cruelest thing anyone said to me.

[B]

I'm gonna be changed. I, I, my mood, my feeling, my being will, will be going one way. I will meet Duncan Trestle. It will go a different way. I don't know. Like I said, I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but it's an experience.

[A]

Well, man, I'm glad that we finally get some real time to talk.

[B]

Yeah. You know, because it's always like in the passing. Yeah. Like doing. Hey, you have spots tonight. Okay. Where are you going up at? Yeah, like, like the normal sort of

[A]

comedian, small talk drift by each other every once in a while as we like go through our weird jobs.

[B]

Like, I just found out you have two kids that I didn't know existed.

[A]

Exactly, exactly.

[B]

You have four now.

[A]

Four kids.

[B]

I have one six year old.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so my sister and I were 15 months apart when my daughter got to be 15 months. I'm like, how the hell did my parents do this again?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

At this time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And you have four. Four, about my daughter's age.

[A]

We spent, you know, we span it out by a few years so, you know, we're not doing like the farmer style breeding where you're just like right when the baby comes out, you're like, let's, it's time to get you pregnant again. We don't do that. So how are you liking being a dad?

[B]

Dude, I love it. It's, it's stressful. I don't love everything about it because there are things, you know, like your freedom. Like and you and I were talking before the mics came on the air about the little things from our pre dad days that we like try to hold on to, you know, but there, but that's, it is a different mindset when you wake up in the morning and you go, oh, I'm not living for me.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I'm living for someone else. Truly. Because you could say you love your wife, you love your partner, whatever, and you live for them. You don't really live for them because if you left, they're fine. If daddy leaves kids, yeah, they're like. And especially if mommy leaves, oh my God. But you know, they're screwed. So it's like you truly are living. And every decision I'm making now is not just like, it's not, hey, if I make this joke, will it help my career? It's. If I make this joke, will it help my career? And also will it send my child into a downward spiral that they, that they will never recover from?

[A]

Right. You got to think about that.

[B]

I do, yeah.

[A]

I think about that all the time. Cause I've been podcasting forever. I mean, there's like years of their dad rambling about weird shit that they're gonna tune into and I don't know what I'm gonna do.

[B]

I can't wait for. Cause you said your oldest is seven.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I can't wait for your kid to start doing school projects and come home and say like, I gotta do this report about American history. And then you kind of go, let me tell you the real history.

[A]

You wanna know what happened? Boys, sit down. I'll tell you what happened.

[B]

Mud.

[A]

The entire country's 120 years old. The entire planet is reset. Tartaria. Boy, I don't believe what they do. Can you turn my. My, my headphones?

[B]

I can't wait for this.

[A]

Dude.

[B]

I, I would. Please not, not in a creepy way, but live stream your kids oral reports, please. Just because I want to know what the influence. Because like I'm assuming that I'm going to like when my daughter has to do oral reports or reports in school. I going to throw in some one liners. Of course I'm going to throw in some stuff where it's a. That's Brad. That's Brad Williams kid right there. You're going to be able to know. I can only imagine Dunky already been

[A]

doing it and like when he's got to do little drawings and stuff. We.

[B]

You think that's a star? Let me tell you.

[A]

You want to see a real star? I got to ask you. And this, this question kind of sucks because it's like a press tour style question.

[B]

You, you. You and I. You and I are friends. It's fine.

[A]

Okay. Okay, great. Well, no, I just mean it's going to seem generic, which is. Dude, you headline Cirque du Soleil.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Holy shit.

[B]

I did yeah, Cirque du Soleil.

[A]

How did that happen?

[B]

Like, how did you get that job? So the show's still going on. I was there for the first three months.

[A]

Mad apple.

[B]

Mad apple at the New York New York Hotel and Casino. Go watch it. It's a great show. But they came to me and said, the guy that ran the show who started the show, he said he was trying to start a Cirque du Soleil show and he wanted a stand up comic. And someone sent him a tape of me. And he goes, okay, that's the line where we have to meet it. And then he saw a bunch of other tapes of other comedians and went, nope, let's go back to the first one and hired me. And when you get a call like that, like, hey, Cirque du Soleil wants you. And you're like, to do what? Yeah, because I'm thinking, like, what suit are you putting me in? What trampoline am I bouncing off of? What cannon am I being fired out of? Am I gonna be going into a pool? Are you playing a droplet sound when I land? Like, like, is that happening? Like, what is, what is, what is this? And then they're like, no, we just want you to do you. We just want you to do you. We just want you to do stand up. Yeah, run out there, start the show, do stand up. Then you'll do another five, seven minutes. In the end will be like 17 minutes total. And you're good. And I'm like, and what are my content restrictions? They're like, we're not the comedian. You're the comedian. Which is the best thing for a comedian to hear.

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

Because very few things are more annoying to a comedian than an unfunny person telling us how to be funny.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

The worst to be a club owner, radio station personality, someone else in the industry, like, well, what you got to do? And you're like, shut up. You've never told a funny joke in your life. You've never been on stage. There's a, there's a Buddy Hackett quote that, that I love, and I'm probably gonna get it wrong, which shows someone. I love it. But the quote was, never trust anyone who never walked the last 10ft. Wow. Or never trust anyone who's ever. Who's never entered through the kitchen. Wow. Because comedians, we've, we've walked that last 10ft of performer, musician, whatever. They've walked that last 10ft. They've gotten up on that stage. We've. We've entered through Kitchens. We've done it. We've done the whole thing to build, so we know what it is to get where we are. So when someone outside of it says something, you're just like, you, you, you know, you never entered through a kitchen.

[A]

I know. That's such a great. The last hit. Oh, my God. You've never sat on a sack of fucking potatoes as your green room. You don't know.

[B]

You've never done a show cat cafe with different cats around and you're like, I have to be funnier than kittens. Than kittens playing with toys.

[A]

It's not happening. You did a show at a cat cafe?

[B]

Yeah, in like Pasadena or something.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Dude. Every. Every comedian has these stories. We would drive, you know, you know, 300 miles to do an open mic or, you know, for no money. So it's like now when I hear certain young comics, like, not willing to do that kind of work and saying, oh, I'll just go on Kill Tony.

[A]

Right?

[B]

And I'll. It's like, first of all, get in line. There's, you know, hundreds of people every night trying to do it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Then you have to kill with one minute. Then you have to kill the interview, which is a whole nother thing, a whole different skill. And then let's say all that goes well for you. Let's say all that goes well and it has gone well for quite, quite a few comedians.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Now you have to tour. Do you have more than one minute? Because you can't do one minute on stage. And for the comedians that have come from Kill Tony, your Fiona colleagues, your Aaron Bilal's, your. And there's many others that have actually done it and done it well. Well done.

[A]

Great.

[B]

I'm so happy for them. Wow. That was a rant off of a Cirque du Soleil question.

[A]

No, it's a great rant because, you know, I think like, obviously any. Anyone who, you know, as a kid sees their first stand up comic or whatever and like, you know, I want to thank Quince for sponsoring this episode of the dtfh. Trussels are breeding. And it's breeding season in the Trussell household. Or post breeding season, which means we got a new baby. And this is what I love about Quince. When you're choosing clothes for your spawn, you got to be careful. In fact, you got to be so careful that you don't do it that your wife does it, because there's no way she's going to let you pick out clothes for your baby. It's not my lane, man. Look, by the time you get to be my age, you know what I mean? You don't want to go to us. You don't want to go to some store and shop. I don't want to do that. Too busy. I don't have time to go flopping into a store. It feels weird. It's awkward. That's why I love quints. I don't have to worry about that anymore. I'm back at the gym. I need new gym clothes. I can't be in the gym with my stinky old gym shorts. Why? I love Quince's Flowknit activewear. Moisture wicking, anti odor. And let me tell you, I need anti odor in my life. And soft enough that you'll actually want to wear it all day. The best part is their prices are 50 to 60% less than similar brands. How? Quint's works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen. So you're paying for quality, not brand markup. Everything is designed to last and make getting dressed easy. You're really going to flop down to some store when you buy your new summer clothes. Don't do it. Wrap yourself in the same fabrics that the Trussell family wraps. The spawn. Refresh your wardrobe with Quince. Go to quints.com Duncan for free shipping and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada. Go to q U-I-N-C-E.com Duncan for free shipping and 360 five day returns. Quince.com Duncan thank you, Quince. In those of us who became comics, we all have stories about the first time you saw stand up and like, how hard it hit and just like

[B]

Eddie Murphy, raw, Bill Cosby.

[A]

We didn't know then.

[B]

We didn't know.

[A]

I was a kid, kid. I had no idea it was drugging people, allegedly. But I.

[B]

My whole life goal is that at, in years, in the future or at any point, no one goes. You know, one of my favorite comics was Brad Williams before the.

[A]

Before, before we found out he's a serial killer.

[B]

That's my whole life goal is just to be like. You don't want anyone to be like, oh, you know, who's your dad? And your kids? Go, Duncan, trestle out. I didn't know about the heads in the cooler. I didn't know about that.

[A]

I ordered them, all right? I ordered them from the Chinese distributor events. Dude, the. But what you're, what you're pointing towards is that there, there's this entire. I don't want to say Secret. But there's this entire experience of being a comedian that you can't know. It's.

[B]

Read all the books, take all the classes, do whatever you want, listen to every podcast, and you still won't get this. And I don't know what it is. I don't know what to call it. This. Je ne sais quoi.

[A]

Je ne sais. It's the back rooms of comedy. It's like the liminal spaces you go into, the hotel hallways, the zillions of fucking airports. Just the weird existential emptiness that can sweep over you as you go. You don't even know you'll wake up and be uncertain of what city you're in. Not because you're drunk, but just because you've been traveling so much.

[B]

The feeling of killing and destroying and being the man or the. Or the woman or whatever, and then going back to that lonely hotel room and going, I'm still amped. That will few things. You could never be truly prepared for that until you do it.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

So never trust someone who's never walked the last 10ft. So when they gave me full carte blanche to do whatever I wanted, it was a challenge because I realized being a comedian for Cirque du Soleil, when I go on stage for my shows, everyone's there to see me. They're there to see stand up comedy. They're there. They have an idea of what stand up is. They have a rhythm in their head of how this is gonna be. When people go to see Cirque du Soleil, they want actors flying out of cannons going wee wee. They want that. That's what they're expecting. So that's what I'm walking out to. So it was almost like, even at the time I was 18 years into comedy, it was almost like going back to open mics where the audience is not there for me.

[A]

No.

[B]

So I have to win them over. And in many cases, Cirque du Soleil, they don't even speak English because they're like, oh, they're. They're tourists and they want to just see an acrobatic show where they don't have to worry about language.

[A]

Dude. Okay. Sometimes I fantasize about, like, if I don't know, the holodeck or whatever. Like, if. If we had a holodeck for stand up comedy. Oh, wow. So you could, you could, you know, if you're feeling down, you could dial in one of those perfect, like, laughing gas crowds. They laugh at everything, even things they probably aren't Even funny, you know, the kind of hot tub crowd where you're like, thank Jesus these exist. And then there's, like, you know, the original room crowd, which is, you know, you don't know what you're gonna get. It's.

[B]

I don't know what you're getting.

[A]

And those are just. That's a good way to test your material, to really know what's funny and what's not. You're not in front of people who came to see you, and that's how you tighten up.

[B]

And then.

[A]

Then there's like. You just want to. You want. You want to put it on, like, the hardest level possible. So.

[B]

So, like, sports Bar open mic. That is. That is. That is the final boss of stand up comedy that you start with.

[A]

I was gonna say opening for Hitler. Like,

[B]

well, at least those people are here to see a speech they like.

[A]

Right? At least they appreciate public speaking.

[B]

They're there to see someone talking to a microphone. Yeah, but, like, sports Bar open mic was always, like, so hard for me because it's literally. There's a sports bar. There's a game on.

[A]

Right.

[B]

All of a sudden, TV goes off, drunk guy in a jersey is angry, and they're like, now we start the comedy show.

[A]

Oh, dude. Who came up with that? Someone who hated sports.

[B]

Sadomasochist. Just a horrible. And. And when I came up, I came up, like, in the early 2000s. So. And I came up in LA, where, you know, I grew up in Orange County. So oftentimes the Lakers were on a run. They were winning championships. Back then, that was Shaq and Kobe. So, like, they would turn off Laker games where guys would be furious. I know you're wearing a Spurs hat. Don't worry. You guys are a great team. Duncan's like, sports.

[A]

How do you know me so well? Did you see what I just did? You see me just immediately shut down?

[B]

Just shut down. Your nervous system was like, I'm not being included.

[A]

Not here anymore.

[B]

But, like, they were doing really well. So turning those games off really got the crowd in a really bad mood. And now it's like, but you survived that. And now nothing scares me right now. I don't like. So.

[A]

But then Cirque du Soleil.

[B]

Yeah. So now I'm normally going on after a comedian who's setting them up. And even if it's bad comedy, it's at least getting into the rhythm of comedy. Now I'm going after two guys that are literally juggling each other with their feet. It's called the it's called the Ikerian Games. That's a. That.

[A]

That.

[B]

That's the name of the act. And I'm like, okay, okay. So I gotta do it. I gotta go on after that.

[A]

And it's a nightmare. It sounds like a nightmare. It sounds like you wake up sweating, like Jesus fucking Christ.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Feet, jugglers.

[B]

So. And then here's. Here's one more wrinkle to throw into it. As if it didn't need any more. I am two weeks away from debuting, and my father passes away. We knew it was coming, but still, it never prepares you. And I was like, oh, my God. And I've got to deal with that. The crew was very cool. They. They let me skip rehearsals and just, like, go and deal and be. And this is before they really knew me. Now they've just met me and we handle it. And then it's like, I didn't just do Cirque du Soleil in my backyard and sleep in my bed. I had to move to Vegas. I move to Vegas. So I fly home. We handle everything with my dad and going through it, grieving. And then it's like, oh, shit, I gotta go to work. And I hear my dad's voice going, do it, pussy. Like. Like, go out there. He'd want me to go perform. Like, don't miss this opportunity to grieve me or whatever. And it was the most healing, wonderful thing. A, because I got to work. B, because it's in an ensemble. Being a comedian, we talk about the things that you can never really learn in a comedy class. Being lonely from being a comedian is something no one really dives into because you think, yeah. What do you mean, lonely? You're on stage. You're the star of the show. You're surrounded by people who love you. There's a loneliness in being a comedian, especially when you're a road dog, where you're constantly by yourself. I got to be part of a cast, an ensemble, and everyone knew my dad had passed. Everyone knew I was still. I was powering through it. So that to be around people that were supportive and to be there and to give me a hug afterward and say, great job. That was incredible. I cannot tell you. There's a comedian who is also in the show. He ended up getting. He ended up last year, so cool. Getting second place on America's Got Talent, which is actually the place you want to get. You don't want to win. You want to get second.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Because if you win, you're in a contract. Oh, wow. If you lose You. You got. You got all the press, but you're free. Wow. So he actually. He won, essentially. His name's Chris Turner. He is a freestyle rapper. He does comedic freestyle raps, but he's British and he's a white guy. It's insane.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

He's so good at it.

[A]

Can you freestyle rap?

[B]

Hell, no. Nothing bad. You could. You could give me a month to write a rap. It wouldn't be as good as this guy. And he and I really became really good friends because we were the comedians of the show.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And we really bonded, and he was really there for me. And so then you go out and you do a show at Cirque du Soleil, and stuff happens. Okay. Like, stuff happens at a comedy show. Maybe the mic doesn't work.

[A]

Maybe.

[B]

Maybe the DJ sets off a track during your set. There's a fight. There's a waitress.

[A]

Fire alarm.

[B]

Fire alarm. Oh, God, that's happened to me. Okay. Fire alarm. Phoenix, stand up live. Fire alarm happened. It was going on throughout the entire mall. I thought it was gonna be like three minutes or two minutes and then stop. It kept going. And I'm like, this was early in my set. So I. I look at the audience that night, and I go, all right, do you want to end the show? Do we. Do we want to wait for God knows how long, or do we want to make a fucking memory?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And they go, memory. I go, okay. So I'm doing the show as the fire alarm is going off. I'm timing my punchlines in between the. I'm do. I'm like, okay. And do the punchline now. Like. And do. And do that. The most math in my head I was ever doing while on stage. So, yeah, I fought through fire alarms. I've fought through sports bars. So we were doing my second segment of the Mad Apple show. I go on after a guy who's performing in something called the Wheel of Death. The Wheel of Death is essentially a giant hamster wheel.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And it spins around, like on a trebuchet or something without launching. And then he's inside the hamster wheel while it's spinning around. And then he gets out of the hamster wheel. He gets on top of the hamster wheel. He jumps rope on top of the hamster wheel. It's insane. It's insane.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And we had a. We had a guy named. At the time. It's a different guy now, but it was. His name was Jose at the time. And then he's doing it, and I go on right after him. And he. There's a trick where he gets off the wheel and then the wheel spins around and then he reaches back and grabs it, and then it flings him up on top of the wheel. It's unbelievable. And this night it flung him, but he let go. So Jose, oh, my God. Flies in the air about 10, 15ft.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Splat on the stage.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

Immediately, there's signs that we do that mean, hey, something happened. People run out. They run to him. He's like. He gets up, you know, they're walking him off the stage. I just saw my friend do that. I have no idea how he is. And then they're looking at me like, and you're on now.

[A]

Holy fuck that.

[B]

I go to the microphone and I say, hey, everybody. Jose. Amazing. It's called the Wheel of Death for a reason. It's not called the Wheel of. That was nice. It's the Wheel of frickin Death. How about a round of applause for Jose? And I go, man, Jose in the Wheel of Death. Mexicans really do do all the jobs that we don't want to do. Kills in the room. And we're back. And then we continue on with the show. And then I come back, check on Jose. He's okay. He's great. And he performed the next night. But it was wild. There was one time where the lighting system completely malfunctioned and went down. And it takes about 10 minutes to restart it. Okay, so it goes mid show down.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then they go, okay, we got to restart the lighting thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then it's an empty stage. And I go, why is there an empty stage? And they're like, well, because you have to restart the lighting thing. I go, do the mic still work? They're like, yeah, yeah, the audio still works. I go, give me a fucking microphone. So I take the microphone, I run out on stage. There's one spotlight goes on me, and I go, this is normal. This is. This is what we do.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's one of the best parts about being a comedian, where all I need is a working microphone, right? I don't need an amp, I don't need a smoke machine, I don't need a fox. I just need a mic.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I go out there, I do about 10, 12 minutes of comedy. We get the sign that the lighting thing is back on, and I go, okay, you ready for more show? All right. And I get the crowd cheering again. And then I walk off stage. There is a Russian hand balancer who is sitting there on the side of the stage looking at me. And I walk off stage and he goes, I have no idea how you do what you do. And I'm like, you're a hand balancer. You go up 50ft in the air, do handstands on two little wooden blocks. You're jumping from thing to thing. If I fuck up a joke, okay, I've got another one. If you slip, you're dead. What do you mean you don't know how I do what I do? The hell? Crazy show, man. Wonderful experience. Like I said, go support that show. And just to be around circus people.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And now you think as a dwarf, I am circus people. But like, but to be around true circus people is truly remarkable. There, there. There's a woman in that cast that gets hung by her hair and around like a top over the audience. And I went to her, I'm like, did that. Does it hurt? And like freaking Wolverine, she looks at me and goes, every time.

[A]

Yeah, but that. See, this is. I want to hear more about this

[B]

because, yeah, it's a culture.

[A]

Yes. The circus is this old form of entertainment that is filled with, with the most eccentric. Like you think it's weird to be a fucking comedian?

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

These are like the, the things these people do. Amazing. They. Yeah, some of them like go way, way back. And it's the most obscure shit.

[B]

They come from families of Acura. And what was wild too, is because it's an ensemble comedians, we can get into our own thoughts and become a little bit of an echo chamber in our own head or just be surrounded by opening acts that all that also share our thoughts. We had Ukrainians and Russians when the conflict broke out, what was that like? They had to stay on separate sides.

[A]

Are you fucking kidding?

[B]

And when they worked, there was like a absolute strict. We are not talking politics. You come in, you do your shit. Like there's performers are literally wondering how their families are doing in a war torn conflict. But like, like I said, circus people are fucking different. There was the closest it ever got to a fight backstage. Had nothing to do with the Russian Ukraine conflict which was going on. But there was a Brazilian guy who was very anti the Bolsonaro, I think his name was.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And you know, far right wing politician there and yeah, very, very anti. And then there was another guy that was pro and there it was. That had to be split up, you know, like. But that's the thing when you have that many people and not just that many Americans, world, all over the world. So now, you know, you got Russians performing With Ukrainians, you got Jews performing. With Palestinians, you got, like, different sides of the aisle. All sorts of things are happening. It really is. It's a sort of a micro climate, micro universe where everyone just kind of has to figure out how to get. How to get along. But it's a beautiful thing because sometimes you get in those echo chambers and you just. Your own thoughts get amplified and you think, well, this is the only way to live. And you never get challenged. It's good to get challenged. It really is. So, yeah, it was truly just an amazing, amazing experience, which I loved doing. And here's one more thing I'll say about it is comedians. We have examples of comedians that have made it. You do a sitcom, you start huge podcasts, you're touring theaters, touring stadiums. I can name you 13 comics off the top of my head that are touring arenas. This is an insane time for comedy, but there are examples of comedians doing really well.

[A]

I want to thank ExpressVPN for supporting this episode of the DTFH. You know what we just did? It's the funniest thing. You gotta get passports for your kids, for your baby. You have to do that in case you gotta, you know, get out of town quick. Want to leave the country for some reason, by the way, I don't mean to seem weird about that. You just do it anyway. But it's really funny. Baby passport pictures are hilarious. Just adorable, but kind of like, you know, mugshot, like. But it's a baby. Anyway. You gotta get passports for your kids yourself. And you should also get passports for your tv. And that's what Express VPN offers you. You might not even know this, but did you know that what you're seeing on Netflix is actually based on where you are on the planet? It's wild. If you use a VPN to access Netflix, you could say you're watching it from anywhere, just about. And it changes what you can see. It's like a magic trick. It's like the dark web, but for Netflix. There's all this stuff all over the planet, but people in Paraguay are seeing something. People in Italy are seeing something, and you're just logging in directly from where you're at. Come on, man. It's as close to teleportation as we can get. Tell the Internet you're in Berlin. See what Berlin Netflix looks like. I'm gonna try that tonight. I haven't tried that yet. It's just weird. Netflix hides content based on your location, and ExpressVPN lets you change your online location. So you can control where you want Netflix to think you're located. They have services in 105 countries in all 50 United States. So you can gain access to thousands of new shows and never run out of stuff to watch. And it works with other streaming services, too. Disney, BBC iPlayer, and more. Also, here's what's great about ExpressVPN. It's so easy to use. You might be like me and you hear VPN and it sounds like you're gonna have to do, like, your own coding or something to get it to work. It's not like that anymore. Just download it, turn it on, say where you wanna say where you want the Internet to think you are, and it just works. Never had a problem with it. Also, it's super fast and it's rated number one by top tech reviewers like CNET and the Verge. I use it regularly, not just to change my location for Netflix, but there's, you know, there's lots of content online that you should probably have a VP on. You know what I mean? So be smart. Stop paying full price for streaming services and only getting access to a fraction of their content. Get your money's [e-mail] Duncan. Don't forget to use my [e-mail] Duncan to get up to four extra months of ExpressVPN. Thank you, ExpressVPN.

[B]

Who's the trapeze artist? You know.

[A]

Oh, yeah. It's like.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[A]

Completely unknown.

[B]

So it's like they're doing these fantastical feats of amazing acrobatic ability and strength and endurance, essentially for the love of the game. Because you're not gonna make mansion money as a juggler. You're not. And these guys are still doing it. So it's so. It's so amazing what they do. And it was so I'm always. Whether it be singers, magicians, acrobats, whatever, as a performer, I'm always so amazed at other styles of performing.

[A]

Same.

[B]

And I try to adopt whatever they're doing. Like, oh, that. I liked that. That's good. That. Oh, that way of getting the audience. I never thought about that.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Like, it's really, really fun.

[A]

Yeah. Like hanging out with comics. Everyone's always, you know. You know, there's an inevitable conversation about some part of stand up. Some, like, weird, tiny part of stand up. But I learned a lot from listening to comics talk about that. But that's just the comedian take, like, being around these, like, essentially, they're like superheroes.

[B]

Like they really are.

[A]

When I went to Cirque du Soleil in Vegas, and you're looking at them and thinking like, that's the same species as me.

[B]

Wild.

[A]

Like the shit that they're doing is insane. Okay, I have a question. I'm like, I apologize in it. It's a vulgar question.

[B]

Oh, fire away.

[A]

But the vibe I got when I went to see Cirque du Soleil, I was on mushrooms, by the way. And I had a horrible trip. Cause I was afraid I was gonna watch someone die. Like, I'm sitting there like, if somebody breaks their fucking neck while I'm tripping up here, I'm gonna. Like, I'll have to go to therapy. But I also got this vibe like they're banging, like they're fucking. You know what I mean? I got this vibe like everyone's fucking everybody.

[B]

Was that true? There is, there is some truth to that.

[A]

It is.

[B]

They tell you. And there's meetings. It's also a weird thing being in a Cirque du Soleil show because like,

[A]

they tell you not to fuck.

[B]

Yeah. They tell you not to fuck. Like, because as a comic, we're our own industries, our own business. There's no hr, there's no payment department, there's no accounting. It's just you. So. But then you go to a Vegas show, you're like, oh, there's a real ecosystem in here and how this all runs.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, yeah, they have the meeting and they tell you don't.

[A]

What do they say? How do they say don't? They just say, don't you guys, please don't.

[B]

Like, don't. They use words like fraternize, you know, like, it's just fancy for.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, like. But yeah, of course people do.

[A]

You gotta get. I mean, just because you're like right there in the face of death every night.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You're also like surging with like testosterone and like you're sweaty. Everybody's smelling everyone's fear sweat.

[B]

Yeah. And. And they're all really good looking.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because they're all acrobats.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So they're in this amazing shape.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So everyone's gorgeous. And then in the show, Mad Apple, there's also singers and. And the singers were amazingly talented. The dancers were amazingly talented. Yeah. There's a lot of good looking people running around, all running around the backstage and fricking spandex and form fitting. And you're just like, oh, boy. And so there was. There was a thing I started to do and I'll do this On Instagram sometimes too, where sometimes someone would change an outfit or we'd all go out afterward and, you know, they change their outfit. And now, I mean, I'm. I'm married, and I never want a woman to ever feel uncomfortable. So now I started doing this thing where when I was in Cirque du Soleil, where, like, one of the acrobats would come in just looking stunning, and I would just look at them, go, socially appropriate comment. And that and that. And that meant. Hey.

[A]

Hi.

[B]

You look good.

[A]

Yeah, good for you. Right, right, right.

[B]

Good for you. You look good.

[A]

You gotta. You gotta be. Yeah. You have to be so careful.

[B]

But I didn't want to be the compliment, like, hey, your. Your tits look amazing, and that's spandex. Like, I didn't want to do that. So I. I would just go, socially appropriate comment.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, these, these. I know what you mean, man. Like, this is really fascinating to hear about. And then you add to it that you're simultaneously. You're dealing with so many different bizarre things around you, and you're grieving simultaneously. And that is, like, it feels. Seems grieving, even if you're not. Opening up for Cirque du Soleil puts you in a kind of liminal zone. Like, you are in between parts of your life. You're in between, like, reality. You're, you know, someone that, you know,

[B]

time kind of stops.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

During that moment where you're like. Because in the moments of grieving, nothing matters. Nothing matters because, you know, you don't care about that call that you miss that email that you've been putting off the bill. Whatever. You're just in a state in between existences where you're like, there was the before, there was the when my dad is alive, and there is the when my dad is no longer here. And right now I'm somewhere in the middle.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't know how. Like, when people do the funerals, like, three days afterward. Like, I think. I don't know if it's Jewish people that have to do it, like, three days afterward or four days after, but some other religions do something similar. I don't know how. I don't know how you do that. I don't know how you do it in four days. We did a celebration of life for my dad, like, I think, like, two months.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

After. After he passed. And that was. You want to talk about the hardest set I've ever done?

[A]

You did. You did a set there.

[B]

Not. I mean, not a set, but, like. Yeah, it's My dad. So, yeah, I ran, I ran the event. I was the main speaker. And yeah, that's the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

[A]

Yeah, it is. It is. What? But to get back to your observation about, like, three days, you're already doing the funeral. It's like you're saying because, and this was my experience too, it's like the idea of doing anything, like, productive in the days following, asinine.

[B]

It seems so dumb. Why, why would I take the trash out? My dad's dead.

[A]

Right. I mean, it's almost like it's a coping mechanism to force. Like, it's like people who do that understand that you are about to get sucked into deep fucking water. And really, better to be in action than in action. Better to be doing stuff.

[B]

And, and there's moments like I remember when, you know, going to the house and, and essentially have to go through dad stuff and like, figure out what stays, what goes. And several times just lost it while going through and just was like, looking at my wife going, I can't, I can't, I, I can't do this. I, I, I, I, I can't look at his things that I saw in his office for years and all. And all of a sudden be like, away with that. Like, it's like, it's like, I understand now and a little bit sympathetic to the hoarders because, oh, you never want to put anything away. And like, throwing away something or giving away something of your dad seems like, well, I'm giving away a part of him. This means I'm not loving him anymore because I'm casting him aside, which is the exact opposite of what I'm doing. So, yeah, there's a lot. It's, it's fucking deep, man. It's fucking deep.

[A]

And you there, there's. Even though, like, this is one of the most monumental events in a person's life. Zero training for it in the West. No, no, not. Certainly not in school. No, they're not going to teach you. Here's how you do. Here's what's going to happen when your parents die.

[B]

Yeah, it'd be funny if. It'd be funny if there was like a class for all right, here's what you do when your parents die and you loved them. Here's the other one. And, but, and the best for anyone who's going through it or about to go through it or whatever, because you will go through it at some point. The best advice I ever got, and I think this is truly beautiful, is the grief will Never go away. You're never without it.

[A]

Right.

[B]

But you don't want to be without it.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Because I am lucky enough to have a father who was there for me, loved me, supported me, did all of that. And so it hurt like hell when he passed. And that pain is. Is a reminder of the love that I was fortunate enough to experience in my life.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So anytime I have that grief, anytime I'm having a down. Dude. I was listening to a podcast a few days ago, and one of the hosts called his dad while he was on the podcast, not to have a moment, just to fuck around with him.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I burst into tears. Just burst into tears. Driving my car. I had to pull over. And it's six years ago, my dad. Four years ago, my dad passed. And I'm still just, like, having this moment because I'm like, I can't do that. I can't call my dad and just have. And have that joke moment. And I. When I realized that, oh, I lost it. So, yeah, the grief still comes back, but when it does, like I said, I. I just go, hey, this is the. This is a reminder that you had a hell of a dad and a hell of a childhood and a hell of a life because of him. And how lucky am I to be able to feel this pain?

[A]

What'd your dad do?

[B]

He was a lawyer.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But he was a defense attorney. You know, kept people out that was. You know, some people that deserved to go out and some people that probably deserved to be in.

[A]

How did he react the first time when he realized you were gonna, like, go for it as a comic?

[B]

Oh, man. It was very strange because I was 19 years old, and I essentially dropped out of college with a year to go to do standup.

[A]

What were you studying?

[B]

Communications.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

We. We didn't lose a cancer cure. You know, like, I look at. I look at Dr. Ken, and I'm like, you're a doctor. We need you.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Like, we need you to do that. Like, that's a valuable skill. I was going to be a sports announcer or something.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But then still, you'd invested for three years in college. Probably your folks helped you pay for that.

[B]

They paid for it.

[A]

They paid for it. So. And then suddenly, like, you're about to finally graduate and.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What'd you say? I just. Did you say? Was that, like, one conversation.

[B]

I told him I was gonna go back. I told him, let me do this for, like, a year. Like, I was gonna tour or something. And, like. And let. And then and then. And then I'll go back to school. But I knew in my head I wasn't going.

[A]

What year of college did you start doing stand up?

[B]

Started doing it late sophomore year. And then at the end of junior year out. And. And, yeah. And. And a junior would add a year to go.

[A]

Where was this?

[B]

Usc, University of Southern California.

[A]

Where were you going?

[B]

Out on Trojans. First ever time I did stand up was at the Laugh Factory open mic in Hollywood.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Not a great place to do if you're for your first time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Jamie Masada, the. The owner of the Laugh Factory, will come up to you, buddy. I tell you what you do, buddy. You have all. We, we do all dwarf comedy show, buddy. You'd have all dwarf in audience, all dwarf comic, all dwarf. And you're just like, all right.

[A]

It's like, it's like. It's well intended. It is. You know what I mean? But it's. It's the worst kind of. Well, and it's like when you have a benevolent heckler.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know what I mean? Legitimately. Seems like a good person.

[B]

Yes. They're trying to. They're trying to help or they're trying to. Or they're heckling you with compliments, which I've had. It's weird.

[A]

You can't. You in front of a whole audience, you get a compliment, heckle.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You obviously can't be like, shut you. What are you doing?

[B]

Yeah. You can't do that.

[A]

Like a monster.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Similarly, when somebody comes up to you proposing a thing like that, you probably. What you want to do is very different from the way you can react.

[B]

And it's like, I was an open micr. So he starts saying this to me. I'm like, well, he's in the business. He owns the Laugh Factory. He probably knows more than me.

[A]

So. Okay.

[B]

But yeah. So going up and doing any open mic around la, there used to be a website. I don't think it's still around, but there used to be a website called chucklemonkey.com.

[A]

okay.

[B]

And you would.

[A]

I remember that website.

[B]

You would click on a state and it would just show you all the open mics in the state every night. It was a valuable, valuable resource.

[A]

That's what you were doing.

[B]

Yeah. Just going, going, going open mics.

[A]

And because you just felt it, you were like, you knew this is what you were going to do. Yeah.

[B]

Oh, you can't. I mean, you know, you can't relate. You can't replicate that feeling.

[A]

No.

[B]

Anywhere else.

[A]

No.

[B]

It's unreal to create a joke, have a thought, and have an audience react positively. Holy shit. Yeah. And thankfully, I was blissfully ignorant as to the odds that I would actually make it important.

[A]

To me, that's an important trait.

[B]

I'm always scared about young comics going up, like, oh, man, we have so much information now. Maybe they know how hard this is.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And maybe they won't try because for whatever reason, but I was blissfully ignorant. I thought, no, you know, I'll do this for like, a year and a half, and then I'll be rich.

[A]

Had no idea. When I started working at the Comedy Store, I same. I. I graduated. And not to brag. Bachelor's degree in psychology.

[B]

Hell, yeah.

[A]

But I was gonna go to graduate school, got it, and wanted to take a year off, move to la, and just ended up with a Comedy Store, knowing I had no idea what the Comedy Store was. Nothing about its history, no idea, nothing. And so I was as blissfully unaware as you could be. I didn't even know how insane it was just to work at the Comedy Store. I didn't know how crazy that was. My dad was like, that's a legendary place. I'm like, I don't know. But that. Yeah. So I had no idea that the odds of making any kind of living at Stand up are infinitesimally astronomical. But I think a lot of that is, you know, there's like a membrane. There's a permeable membrane that separates people who become comics from people who don't. And that's those open mics. That's all of the stuff you're talking about. The grind, the wretched grind.

[B]

Being willing to do that. Yeah.

[A]

You have to. You have to be willing to do that, and you have to be. You have to be insanely willing to do that and not care that you're not. That it's not working out. You gotta be okay with failure.

[B]

There's a story that I love. It's of Jerry Seinfeld and Michael Richards. Yes, that Michael Richards. And a guy comes up and he's like, oh, my God, Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards. And, you know, you guys are great. You guys are wonderful. I love comedy. And then he says, you know, I'm thinking about getting into Stand up myself. And Michael Richards looks up and goes, you're never gonna make.

[A]

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[B]

And the guy goes, what are you talking about? Like you don't even know. You don't even know if I'm funny or not. And he goes, because you said the words, I'm thinking about doing stand up comedy. If you're a comedian, you have to do this.

[A]

Yeah, you don't think about it.

[B]

You don't think about it. If you, if you thought about it,

[A]

you won't do it.

[B]

You wouldn't do it.

[A]

Not in a million years, no.

[B]

Why would you?

[A]

No one in their right fucking mind would do that.

[B]

Why as an open mic young comic, would you go up in front of a room full of strangers and say, you know, what for? I have no experience doing this, but for about the next Five, ten minutes. All y' all shut up. I'm the only one that's allowed to talk. That's an insanely narcissistic feeling.

[A]

Incredibly, incredibly insane. Insanely narcissistic. And you're surrounded by insane narcissists, and you're in this cauldron of madness in the beginning. And you get moments like the one you had with Masada and countless other moments where people claiming to be experts in this or that, grifters like God, think of the people you run into, or God help you, the elders of a standup comedy room. You know what I mean? People who act like they're master comic books is they've been doing open mics for five years.

[B]

There was my very first open mic. I'll never forget this. I showed up in there, and there was a guy there going, hey, look at me. Going, I've never seen you before. Is this your. Is this your first one? And I go, yeah, it's my first open mic. And he goes, all right, man, no problem. Just talk to me. Ask me any questions you got. Hang with me. Do what I do. I've been doing this open mic for 15 years. And then I go, I'm not doing anything you do. I don't want to be here in 15 years. He's like. He just said, don't worry, I got you. And it's like, all right, I'll do. I'll do everything. You don't do.

[A]

You don't do.

[B]

Yes. And then he goes up in bombs. Of course he did. But, yes.

[A]

It's your first day in prison, man.

[B]

I'm not trying to get here. I'm not. This wasn't the plan. I didn't. I. I'm not going to be the king of the open mics. I wanted to, you know, go on and do stuff, but. Yeah, back to your original question. But then as soon as I started getting regular work and making a living, my dad was like, all about. All about it.

[A]

What about your mom?

[B]

Mom was a little more like, Yep. Because, you know, it's putting yourself out there.

[A]

Same.

[B]

I remember one time when I was shooting my first special Fun Size, my mom was in the audience. And at one point during the taping of that special, I totally. I totally blank. I'm just like, I have no idea what joke is next. And this is when we shot at the Libero theater in Santa Barbara, California, and it was, like, half full. We moved the audience around so it's a camera trick, so it looks full. That first special Fun Size. That is not a full theater. Wow. It's not like my brand new special, Live on Short street, which is currently airing on my YouTube channel. It filmed in Lexington, Kentucky, where we did it over two nights, and both shows sold out.

[A]

You selling everything out now?

[B]

Now is great, but, like, back then, so. But my mom is there, and I blank, and we. Only because it's half full. I got two shots at the most recent special. We, you know, one shot. So I'm going, all right, they'll let. They'll let this out. And I tell the audience, hey, I just forgot what I need to say next. Hold on, I'll get it. And then as I'm thinking, I'm going, oh, my mom's in the audience.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

She's so nervous right now because she's nervous for me. Like. And so I started talking to my. From the stage, like, hey, Mom, I'm okay. I'm just letting you know I'm okay. Like, I'm fine. I'll get it. This is part of it. They're gonna. They're gonna edit all this out. And then, like, as I'm talking, like, oh, all right. That joke. And then I go right back into it. So, yeah, like, she was always, like, now she'll. She's 80 years old. I've been doing this for 22 years. She'll call me and go, where are you off to this week? And I'll. And I'll be like, I'm going to St. Louis. And she'll go, oh, God, I could say any city. No, any city. Doesn't matter. It's just, oh, God, you're good. Hop on a plane. But. But, like, she's. She just doesn't want me to be hurt. But at the same time, like, she loves it. She knows it's my passion. She knows it's what I do. She knows I make a good living doing it now. And. Yeah. So how are you doing being away from your kid, bro? She did the first. I was told this was gonna happen.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I was told. Brian Posayn told me one. Every comic who has kids. This will happen to you where your kid will say something to you when you're going on the road that'll make you want to quit the business and stay home. And the first one happened to me the last week.

[A]

What was it?

[B]

Because I had just been on the road, and I just got home, and then I knew I had to. And we. We did a family day, and then I knew I had to leave the next day to Go back and. But I had to get home, do a family day. Okay, cool. And then I'm telling her she's six. I'm going, hey, you know, daddy's got to go to work. And then she just looks up and goes again. I'm just like, fuck this business. Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it. I want to quit. I want to go home. I want to just hug my kid. I want to watch her read books. I want to take her to parks and museums and buy her a pony. Like, I want to do all that posein told me, though, this is the worst one I've heard that his kid did to him. And I hope he doesn't mind that I'm telling the story. If not, sorry, Brian, but you're a great comic and you're a friend, but this is the kind of stuff that we go through where he was heading out and like, all right, buddy, I gotta go and work. And this kid goes like, you know why? Why? You know why you gotta go, dad. Why you gotta go? He goes, well, this is how, you know, daddy pays for everything. Like, this is how we like, you know, your Xbox and your blank.

[A]

Blank.

[B]

These are nice things. And this is how. This is how we get it. And the kid looks up and goes, well, I don't need those things.

[C]

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[D]

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[B]

And you're just like, oh, bless you, kid. So, yeah, and that's what. That's. That. That's this life. So I'm telling you, I got two weeks off when I go home tomorrow. And I got two weeks off. Yeah, kid, we're Gonna do stuff.

[A]

Yeah, but you. Then what happens is what I've noticed with myself is this kind of. I don't want to say frantic, but because you know you're gonna have to hit the road again and you've got this span of time. And so then I just. I don't know how to put it. Like, I feel like I'm overcompensating, you know, like.

[B]

Oh, definitely. Every comic with kids is the divorced parent that when they split custody, they're like, all right, you were with me this week. We're going to Disneyland. We're going this. We're gonna buy you all the things. We're gonna do other things. Yeah. Because the comic comes home and I'm like, all right, we'll do all the things.

[A]

It's not fair to the mom. No, because the mom's having to regulate. Mom's having to like, you know, do the. The day to day stuff. The kids have no idea. Like, without it, they probably all be dead.

[B]

They'd be naked and dead. And I'm. And I'm in here. And here comes fun dad.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

I get to be fun dad.

[A]

I don't know how to fix that. I mean, I don't know. I'm not. I'm not certain how to balance it out, man. Yeah, you know, I don't. I'm not sure what to do about that.

[B]

That's something. I. I go to therapy and I'm definitely talking to my therapist about that. Like, Like, I'm going through whatever I'm going through right now. And also I'm like pre planning in the future.

[A]

You know what? I should send my wife to therapy. Doug is like, that's the answer.

[B]

Duncan's like, I'm not doing it. I do mushrooms. I don't have to do it.

[A]

Yeah, I gotta get into therapy, man. You probably. That's probably a good, good move.

[B]

It's, you know, I'm a. I'm a. I'm an advocate for therapy. I was a long time guy that questioned it and was like, I don't need it. I'm fine. And then I started going to it. I'm like, oh, man. And it's. It, it's made me a better father. It's made me a better partner. Conflict resolution is. I'm a lot better at it now. So. Yeah, I'll tell people. It's great. But it's kind of like, you know, you gotta find the right therapist.

[A]

That's for sure.

[B]

You gotta find the right one that talks to you. And you're like, okay, you're getting it

[A]

and does happy endings.

[B]

Thousand percent.

[A]

That would be great. Why isn't that thing.

[B]

So there's a bit I'm working on right now that's kind of about this where it's not done yet. So I'll do like the of it. But it's like. So I, I say heckling in comedy is a lot like happy endings in massage. It's part of. Shouldn't be. It should not be part of it. We should not have hecklers. I should not have to deal with this.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I shouldn't be yelling out and massage therapist should not have to deal with guys going, so you're gonna jerk me up? No, like that. That shouldn't be a part of it.

[A]

It.

[B]

And also, why did we decide on massage as where we do hand jobs? How did that industry get to it? Why that industry? I don't need a hand job and I'm getting a massage. I'm relaxed, I'm comfortable. I'm hearing calming music. It's beautiful. I'm in a beautiful state of being.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Give me a handy at the dmv. That's what I'm stressed. I'm stressed out, dude. Shit's happening. I'm. I, I. Number five is called. I'm number 342.

[A]

Traffic stops.

[B]

Traffic stops. Hand job.

[A]

At least you're getting a hand job.

[B]

At least you're getting a hand job. Think about all the. That you gotta go through.

[A]

So fascinating with.

[B]

You're like, certainly waiting in the doctor's office.

[A]

Everyone would love going to the doctor. It'd be a much healthier.

[B]

Oh, my God. Could you imagine if. If you're going to. I'd go to the doctor three times a week.

[A]

I would be always. Honey, I don't know what's going on. Just I'm feeling. I'm feeling like I need to go get my blood sugar. It's the seventh time this week.

[B]

Yeah, exactly like that. We, we, we need. We need hand jobs in way different places. Anytime I turn on the news, I should have a flashlight because that will help me feel better.

[A]

Oh, my God. Do you know what you just came up with?

[B]

Billion dollar Industry.

[A]

Fox News. Okay, so you. This is your idea, man.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Right after this podcast, you go and.

[B]

Llc.

[A]

Llc, man. But go make it the. You know, they, they do have, apparently these. I know this because I did someone's podcast and like, they had sent them these things that hook up to the Internet and so they sync up with porn. So basically Flashlight that syncs up with porn. And they're like, you want it? You want it? And I'm like. For a second, I'm like, yeah. And then I'm. Then I realized, like, but this is connecting to some company that's gonna have like a record of not just like, what porn I'm looking at, but like, how quickly I come into this fucking. It's gonna know all these.

[B]

All of a sudden you get ads on your phone. Like, do you come in 30 seconds when watching porn with your flashlight?

[A]

You're like, what the.

[B]

How do you know that shit?

[A]

But dude, one of those. But that syncs up with. With Fox News. So when there's like breaking news, it like.

[B]

Yeah, pumps breaking news war in and on. And he's just like,

[A]

Dude, I'm telling you, it syncs up with Daylight. Syncs up with Forensic Files. Let's just. Let's cut to the reality of what

[B]

today, the neighborhood five year old kidnapped from a school. Partner up.

[A]

For that.

[B]

I try. I tried to think of the most monstrous, horrible thing, and then I realized I transported us to Epstein's Island. Okay, Sorry about that.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[B]

We're hashing this bit out.

[A]

Oh, yeah, it's just a bit, guys. It's a bit. Trust me, these days, someone's like, oh my God. That's it. That's what I've been looking for. You're going to see it. Someone will make this.

[B]

I hope so.

[A]

Dude, it. It. It's really.

[B]

It'll be. It'll be my idea. And I. And I. And I. I won't make money off it, but I don't care.

[A]

Well, look, it's. It's recorded here because by the way, have you ever got one of those? Oh, my God, don't do it if you haven't. If, if never do this. But you know, they have what they're called, those 5D theater seats. You ever done that?

[B]

Yeah, where it's like. It rumbles and it like sprays mist at you and like watching a movie

[A]

in the back of a truck.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I want to say here, it sucks. How do I eat my snacks if the popcorn is going back?

[A]

My kids are getting flung out of the chair. They love it, but it's just. It's the worst. Horrible. But I. Again, I don't mean to keep fixating on this idea, but that's what we're talking about.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

This is this. It can be anything. Like, why are we only syncing our flashlights up with porn? That's the Question. That's what I'm telling you, man. This is, this. I feel, you know, I feel like, I feel like I'm, I feel like I'm Bill Gates.

[B]

This is the Bill Gates in the garage moment. We're sinking fleshlights with our porn

[A]

sounds. I mean, what, what could.

[B]

Oh my God.

[A]

Sink of a flashlight.

[B]

Anything.

[A]

The sound of the wind.

[B]

Oh my God. Like the sound of the coffee maker going off in the morning.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Yeah. You know, you set your coffee maker for 6:50am and you also set your flashlight, an alarm clock.

[A]

It wakes you up.

[B]

Time to get up. Time to get up.

[A]

Well, sir, thank you so much for coming on the show.

[B]

I'm glad that we're ending on hand jobs.

[A]

Happy ending. Where can people find you? Where are you going?

[B]

Brad Williams, comedy dot com. Go to bradwingscomedy dot com I'm, I'm currently on the Tall Tales tour, touring all over all of the great US of A. And in the, in December, I'm going to Europe. So if you're, if you're listening in England or Scotland or Norway or Amsterdam or Sweden, I'm coming there, man. It, it's gonna be awesome. And of course, my brand new special live on Short street on my YouTube channel, please go watch that. And I have a podcast as well. You're listening to a podcast? Why don't you listen to me to a podcast? It's called Heightened Babble. It's me and my buddy JB Ball, who's a 6 foot 3 black guy from Tampa. So we're exactly the same. And we, we just find weird stories on the Internet and we just talk about them. We're not, we're non political, we don't talk about sports. You'd love it. And we just find weird stories on the Internet and we just talk about them. So that's, that's the Brad Williams catalog. That's the kit. Watch the special, listen the podcast, go see me on tour. But links down below if you want

[A]

to, if you don't want to type

[B]

something in and tell, tell me that Duncan Trestle sent you because then I will know what kind of fan you are and I will go, okay, this is, this is a comedy fan. I like you. This is great, bro.

[A]

Thank you, Brad.

[B]

Whenever we talk, it's, it's always too brief. So it was very nice to, very

[A]

nice to chat with you for an hour, man. Yeah, man. Thank you so much.

[B]

Of course.

[A]

That was Brad Williams, everybody. All the links you need to find him are down below. Thank you so much. For watching the dtfh. And thank you to our beloved sponsors for keeping food in my children's mouths. I love you and I'll see you on the night stream. Bye.

[D]

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[A]

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[D]

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