Extra Dirty with Hallie Batchelder
Episode Title: Dating is not a hobby I subscribe to
Host: Hallie Batchelder
Date: September 4, 2025
Episode Overview
In this solo episode, Hallie Batchelder brings listeners deep into her current state of mind—balancing NYC influencer chaos, personal vulnerabilities, and her infamous raunchy storytelling. Hallie revisits her ongoing mental health and body-image struggles, offers an honest perspective on online bullying, and breaks down her philosophy on dating (“It’s not a hobby I subscribe to”). She delivers signature candid reflections on being single while her friends are in love, offers unfiltered commentary on New York Fashion Week red carpet looks, and rounds off with wild listener-submitted hookup stories and her equally wild reactions.
Opening Check-In & Mental Health Update
[03:05 – 11:40]
- Hallie begins by acknowledging her absence from solo episodes, stating her desire to make this one “really fun and like, talking about, like, sucking dick… extremely raunchy and fun and silly and like, to the core of what Extra Dirty is.”
- She takes a detour to update listeners on her ongoing mental health and eating disorder journey, referencing a recent TikTok she posted addressing her struggles:
- “I want to make this episode like, extremely, like, raunchy and fun and silly… But, you know me, like Extra Dirty—it’s not just about the raunchy stuff. It’s about what I’m going through.” [03:55]
- She shares candidly about her feelings of vulnerability, the pressure to update her audience on her progress, and the complexity of healing (“None of this is linear... there is no cure… you have to learn how to deal with it.”).
- Hallie calls out the increase in online bullying, especially from “burner accounts” and trolls, likening it to the anonymous cruelty of Formspring days:
- “I’m sad for them that they have to go out, go to sleep at night knowing that no one gives a fuck about them or knows who they are.” [07:40]
- She thanks her supporters, both silent and vocal, and emphasizes the importance of a support system—friends in New York, Matt, Alex, and her family.
Fall Vibes and NYC Life
[11:41 – 19:55]
- Shifting away from heavier topics, Hallie discusses entering fall and why seasonal transitions make her “nostalgic and kind of emo.”
- “When it’s turning super dark at 4pm and it’s cold … I’m thinking about going to Miami for a few months just to get out of the darkness that is winter.” [14:25]
- Expresses excitement for:
- Men returning to the city post-Hamptons/Euro summer
- Upcoming fashion events (Fashion Week, collaborations with Garage, Brunch and Prince)
- Reflects on feeling isolated as her best friends are in relationships ("All my friends are happy in happy-ass relationships… I’m, like, traveling left and right. I am booked and busy…”).
Single Life & The Anti-Dating Manifesto
[19:56 – 29:37]
- Hallie describes her self-imposed dating “drought”—not out of lack of options, but mental self-preservation:
- “I am in no position right now. I don’t have the mental capacity to put myself in a vulnerable situation with a man. I just feel like that would… be disastrous right now.” [20:45]
- Touches on pressures to date, especially as friends move on to engagements and living with partners. She stresses she has “no desire to just settle.”
- Laments the lack of casualness in modern dating:
- “Why can’t things just be, like, a little casual sometimes? What happened to being casual? Everyone just thinks that, like, you hook up with someone a few times and you want to date. Has anyone listened to my show? That’s not really how I move at all.” [24:54]
- Hallie playfully hypothesizes where single NYC men are hiding (members clubs, gyms, coffee shops), and bemoans her Uber Eats habit keeping her from real-life meet-cutes.
- “I Uber Eats too much. I’ll Uber Eats a Starbucks. I need to stop that. My dad is getting really mad at me for doing that.” [27:29]
Hallie’s Signature Raunch: Sex, Confidence, and Head
[29:38 – 34:22]
- Hallie jokes about being known for giving great head, wondering if getting her “lips dissolved” will affect her reputation:
- “I give firehead and I always have. I don’t care if you guys come at me for being fatherless, blah blah blah. You’re such a fucking whore. That is a hill I will die on—or I will suck on. I will suck on that hill.” [32:10]
- She describes how oral sex calms her anxiety: “There’s something about sucking dick that calms me down and just brings my anxiety from a 10 to a 2 and so I appreciate it.” [32:50]
New York Fashion Week Red Carpet Reviews
[34:23 – 38:45]
- Hallie reviews recent celebrity red carpet looks, offering unfiltered (but non-malicious) opinions:
- Helen Mirren: “It’s just too… kind of reminds me of a curtain. Is that bad to say?”
- Paris Hilton: “I would rock this. I love the sunglasses, and the gloves are everything to me.”
- Dakota Johnson: “This is a dress I would wear… She could be chic and cunt in a trash bag.”
- Zoe Kravitz: “She always looks timeless and beautiful… There’s not much bad you can say about Zoe Kravitz.”
- Jenna Ortega: “10 out of 10, no notes. See, this is giving. This is what I would like to give in New York City in the winter.” [38:06]
- Overall, she emphasizes that personal style should be whatever makes you “feel most confident in.”
Listener Hookup Stories & Hallie’s Reactions
[40:01 – 53:53]
Segment Highlights:
- Hallie responds to bad/crazy/hilarious hookup stories submitted by listeners. Notable entries and her reactions:
- A guy offers $1,000 to have someone defecate on his chest:
“Just clearing the air—I never let anyone shit on my chest and I would never shit on anyone else’s chest. Like, maybe for a lot of money though. Like, millions…” - Hooking up with a boss nearly 30 years older:
“I don’t see anything wrong with an age gap. I have hooked up with guys in their 50s. They definitely thought it was kind of hot… Just don’t get fired. We are not getting fired over some dick.” [43:30] - Threesome with a manager and her boyfriend:
“It’s hot, but is it gonna be awkward at work? When you’re having a threesome, you have to be the random third. Otherwise, things could get really weird.” - Swallowed a load in a porta potty at a Rufus Du Sol concert:
“Honestly, period. But if I were to swallow a load, the last place I would do it would be in a porta potty. The thought of that makes me want to gag. And not in a good way… but I kinda want to be friends with you!” [45:18] - Used an ex’s credit card because he was cheating:
“…He gave me chlamydia and I wouldn’t stop using it until he canceled his card. That’s just two plus two equals four. I was using the money to go to the clinic to get the chlamydia pills.” [46:18] - Got a vibrator stuck and needed to be fisted to remove it:
“I can’t say this has ever happened to me… At least it wasn’t stuck in your ass. That would have been a lot more difficult.” - Never finished in six years of marriage:
“Divorce. That’s all I have to say. Next.” - Has she slept with her guy friends?
“Yeah, most of them, probably… Theo James at that point at the end of the night and I’m just like, ready to rumble.” - Boyfriend likes to borrow her clothes and paint his nails:
“It’s giving Caitlyn Jenner circa 2011. Are you okay with that? That’s all that matters. If you’re not, then, you know, pack it up.” - Got peed on by boyfriend:
“You know, sometimes it’s nice and warm. That’s happened to me before in the shower… but like, if you like it, you like it.” - Blacked out and called her high school ex for sex:
“That’s what connects us as girls. That’s girlhood right there. Don’t feel bad… You know what that dick is like. You know it’s gonna be hot and passionate.”
- A guy offers $1,000 to have someone defecate on his chest:
Notable Quotes
- On trolls and internet hate:
- “People comment these troll ass comments knowing that they’ve never been anyone in their life at all and they think that if their comment gets likes that that’s some sort of validation towards them, when in reality they mean absolutely nothing to the world.” [07:18]
- On dating:
- “Dating is not a hobby I subscribe to.” [25:34]
- On casual hookups:
- “I can do casual sex and it’s not that deep. And I love them all. Whatever.” [52:20]
- On ex-sex:
- “Ex sex is amazing sex because it has a little bit of hate, a little bit of hurt, a lot of passion… You’re always going to finish.” [52:59]
Important Timestamps
- Mental health & bullying update: [03:05 – 11:40]
- Transition to fall and NYC life: [11:41 – 19:55]
- Single life & dating philosophy: [19:56 – 29:37]
- Signature sex/raunch discussion: [29:38 – 34:22]
- Fashion Week red carpet reviews: [34:23 – 38:45]
- Listener story segment: [40:01 – 53:53]
Tone & Takeaways
Hallie remains unfiltered, self-deprecating, and relatable throughout, mixing dark humor with real vulnerability. She combines wild anecdotes, pop culture commentary, frank sex talk, and genuine advice in a way that feels like a late-night sleepover with brutally honest friends. The episode is a blend of self-acceptance, comic defiance, and the struggle to stay true to yourself (and have fun!) amid chaos—NYC, social media, mean comments, and romantic confusion all included.
Final Message:
“Thank you for all the support, always. You guys are my people, my rocks… This episode was a bit mix of, you know, chaos and it was a little bit heavy. But all in all, I love you guys.” [53:33]
For More:
- Listen on your podcast platform of choice
- Watch on YouTube
- DM stories for future episodes via @extradirty