Strip clubs, poppers & blasted in Space (Miami debrief)

Summary

Episode Summary: "Strip clubs, poppers & blasted in Space (Miami debrief)"

Release Date: March 27, 2025

Introduction

In this vibrant episode of Extra Dirty with Hallie Batchelder, host Hallie and her loyal friends Lauren Fishbein and Graydon Cutler dive deep into their recent adventures in Miami. From wild nights at strip clubs to introspective conversations about relationships and personal growth, Hallie and her crew offer an unfiltered glimpse into their chaotic yet entertaining lives in the Big Apple and beyond.

---

Miami Memories and Initial Impressions

Hallie kicks off the episode by sharing her overall experience in Miami, emphasizing how the sunshine significantly boosted her mood and serotonin levels. She highlights the importance of staying hydrated, humorously mentioning her Hydro Jug Traveler, which she always keeps by her side to maintain her "beautiful voice" for podcasting ([00:30]).

Notable Quote:

Hallie ([01:19]): "Miami's not for the weak, but it is helping with my serotonin production. I feel like all I needed was some sun."

---

The Night at 11 Strip Club

The conversation shifts to Hallie's wild night at 11, a popular strip club in Miami during Music Week and Spring Break. Despite her excitement, the club was overwhelmingly packed, making it challenging to secure a table and enjoy the show. Hallie describes the strippers as more of a "club with questionable outfits" rather than traditional performers ([03:55]).

Notable Quote:

Hallie ([03:55]): "It was just a club with, like, a couple of questionable outfits."

Alex joins in, recounting the chaos of trying to navigate the crowded club and the disappointment of not getting the full strip club experience she anticipated.

---

Private Room Antics and Sexual Escapades

Hallie narrates an incident involving a charismatic man she met on a boat in Miami, who eventually showed his "third leg" (a metaphor for deceit or ulterior motives) ([05:27]-[06:27]). This encounter leads to a series of sexual adventures, including interactions in private rooms at the strip club. Hallie humorously details how she ended up recording her escapades, leading to self-reflection the next day upon watching the footage ([07:49]-[09:10]).

Notable Quote:

Hallie ([07:25]): "I turned into a fuck boy. Like a picture. Frontwards, hat on. It's like I turned it around, become Justin Bieber at the strip club."

---

Drug Use and the Miami Party Scene

The hosts delve into the prevalent use of substances like ecstasy (XD) and poppers during their Miami trip. Alex shares a harrowing experience of taking too much ecstasy, leading to intense hallucinations and a terrifying trip to the bathroom ([12:51]-[14:56]). The discussion highlights the dangers and unpredictability of drug use in party-heavy environments.

Notable Quote:

Alex ([13:48]): "I was literally in space. The room went black. It was one of the scariest experiences of my life."

Hallie reflects on her own drug use, particularly ecstasy and poppers, discussing how these substances affected their perceptions and interactions at parties ([29:12]-[30:11]).

---

Dating Patterns and Relationship Insights

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to Hallie and Alex exploring their dating behaviors and relationship dynamics. Hallie admits to quickly romanticizing relationships, hyper-fixating on potential partners, and overanalyzing interactions to the point of creating fake scenarios ([21:12]-[23:58]). Alex concurs, sharing similar patterns and emphasizing the challenges of maintaining multiple relationships.

Notable Quote:

Hallie ([21:24]): "My hobby is not dating. It's chasing."

Alex adds her perspective on the "chase" in relationships, likening it to a form of cardio and discussing the mutual desire to be desired and taken care of within their relationships ([23:10]-[25:06]).

---

Friend Dynamics and Group Interactions

The episode also touches on the dynamics within Hallie’s friend group, including humorous anecdotes about jet ski accidents and interactions with other friends like Graydon. They recount past experiences in Miami, emphasizing the tight-knit yet chaotic nature of their friendships ([36:40]-[39:20]).

Notable Quote:

Alex ([38:21]): "Honestly, watching Hallie on a jet ski is frightening. She has no fear."

Graydon shares his own mishaps and relationship troubles, providing a comedic yet relatable look into the complexities of maintaining friendships amidst the party lifestyle ([44:12]-[46:55]).

---

Guest Appearance: Jesse Solomon as Steve Buscemi

In a surprising twist, Jesse Solomon, portrayed as the iconic actor Steve Buscemi, joins the podcast to answer listener-submitted questions. The segment is filled with humorous exchanges, blending reality with playful character antics. Topics range from hookup stories to humorous takes on reality TV behavior ([47:01]-[52:09]).

Notable Quote:

Steve Buscemi ([47:09]): "I would do bad things."

This segment adds a layer of entertainment and variety to the episode, showcasing the show's ability to blend scripted characters with genuine conversations.

---

Closing Moments and Reflections

As the episode wraps up, Hallie and Lauren discuss their hangover-induced reflections, recounting the previous night's events and the group's plans moving forward. They emphasize the importance of friendship and the ability to laugh off chaotic experiences, leaving listeners with a sense of camaraderie and anticipation for future episodes ([51:48]-[52:26]).

Notable Quote:

Hallie ([52:09]): "Extra Dirty. Like subscribe. You can watch on YouTube and watch on any other platform. I'm hammered. Braden's hammered and Jesse's hot. And I love you all."

---

Conclusion

"Strip clubs, poppers & blasted in Space (Miami debrief)" is a whirlwind of wild stories, candid conversations, and humorous reflections. Hallie Batchelder and her friends navigate the highs and lows of Miami's party scene, offering listeners an unfiltered look into their lives filled with debauchery, drama, and unwavering friendship. This episode stands out for its honest portrayal of the complexities of modern relationships, the allure and dangers of party culture, and the enduring bond between friends amidst chaos.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Hallie ([01:19]): "Miami brings up a lot of memories for me. I was a psychopath I once lived in Miami with Lauren back in the day."
• Alex ([03:55]): "The strippers weren't stripping. It was just a club with, like, a couple, like, questionable outfits."
• Hallie ([07:25]): "I turned into a fuck boy... become Justin Bieber at the strip club."
• Alex ([13:48]): "I was literally in space. The room went black."
• Hallie ([21:24]): "My hobby is not dating. It's chasing."
• Steve Buscemi ([47:09]): "I would do bad things."
• Hallie ([52:09]): "Extra Dirty... I'm hammered. Braden's hammered and Jesse's hot. And I love you all."

This comprehensive summary encapsulates the essence of the episode, providing an engaging and informative overview for both regular listeners and newcomers alike.

Transcript

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[Hallie]

Ever since I started podcasting I have just been drinking so much water to keep my beautiful voice lubricated. With that being said, I always have my Hydro Jug Traveler strapped to my side. I legit took it with me today to get my lips filled. The Hydro Jug Traveler is completely leak proof cup holder compatible and has a hygienic circular flip straw for easy breezy sipping. It comes in multiple colors and sizes, 40, 32 and 20 ounces so you can find the perfect bottle that matches your style. You deserve to hit your hydration goals. Go to the hydro jug.com and use code EXTRA dirty to save 10% at checkout. That's code EXTRA [e-mail] for 10% off at checkout. I look over and the paparazzi is like snapping and I'm like, oh my whole fake yabo is going to be on the daily mail.

[Lauren]

What if your nipples on daily tomorrow?

[Hallie]

Honestly? Tag me. We're happy little. Okay, guys, I'm doing something really stupid right now. We have an emergency debrief situation. Hi, this is Hallie from the streets of New York. Guys, welcome back to Extra Dirty. I'm here with your one and only Lauren. You look great today, Lauren.

[Alex]

Really?

[Hallie]

How are we feeling?

[Alex]

Over after my one drink.

[Hallie]

We're in Miami right now and let me just say, Miami's not for the week, but it is helping with my serotonin production. I feel like all I needed was some sun. Like I don't need anything else. I just need a UV to be above a 7 and we're good to go.

[Alex]

You can literally wait. Did you, did you tan?

[Hallie]

I did. I hit the bed tan and maybe did a spray tan. I was in the bed tan a lot more than I probably should have last week. But you need the base layers.

[Alex]

Yeah, I need to.

[Hallie]

I've gotten a lot of compliments on my tan.

[Alex]

Yeah, Matt just complimented you.

[Hallie]

But anyways, we have a lot to go over this week. I mean, we're in Miami. Miami brings up a lot of memories for me. I was a psychopath I once lived in Miami with Lauren back in the day. We stayed at this janky ass Airbnb. We paid nothing, nothing for it. And it was considered a penthouse. It was in the scariest building in Miami.

[Alex]

It still might be this Everything.

[Hallie]

I remember everything in the apartment. Yeah, it was like made of plastic. Do you remember that? Like, everything was like, like all.

[Alex]

The chair. Yeah, it was like all acrylic and it was.

[Hallie]

We also stayed there. We said there, like, probably five years ago. It was during the tail end of COVID so, like, things were kind of opening up. Things were kind of restricted. There was a lot of, like, warehouse parties. Like, if you know, you know, if you don't know, you don't know.

[Alex]

We need to. We need to talk about those parties.

[Hallie]

We got to talk about the warehouse parties. But first, I want to go over last night. Last night we went to 11. I was begging Alex. I was like, alex, we must get a table at the strip club. I need you. I need to see it. I need to see you in this element.

[Alex]

She like, she's like, ask mad.

[Hallie]

Yeah, yeah. We had to get the price down a little bit. Then she was like, yeah, it's good to go. Matt approved. It was like, what, 2am we went. It was a show nightmare. It is like, Miami Music week is next week. It's also spring break. So the club was packed. Everyone and their mother was there.

[Alex]

The strippers, like, weren't stripping?

[Hallie]

No, they were like, kind of.

[Alex]

It was just a club.

[Hallie]

It was just a club with, like a couple, like, questionable outfits.

[Alex]

To be fair, though, like, our area was so jam packed, all the strippers trying to get in, but they just, like, couldn't, I think.

[Hallie]

Yeah, like, you look at me being like, makeup tits. And I was like, there's nowhere to sit. There's literally nowhere to gave up.

[Alex]

Remember that man dancing?

[Hallie]

Oh, wait.

[Alex]

He was like.

[Hallie]

I was.

[Alex]

Do you guys remember what's that movie, White Chicks?

[Hallie]

He was emotional and he was like.

[Alex]

With the guy with the whistle and he's like. There was one of those.

[Hallie]

That was scary. It was watching a car accident. I couldn't look away.

[Alex]

It was insane.

[Hallie]

It was insane. But I do have a funny story. You remember this time. Lauren, let's go back to our Miami days, okay. And I have a couple different Miami experiences. We had the experience where we lived here. Yeah, I was kind of seeing that guy. But then when we visit, we also have these, like, other random experiences with the daddies. And these daddies, we've definitely talked about them on this show, we've gone over this. They all run in the same friend group. They're all about the same age. They're never going to commit. They're never going to get married. They have Peter Pan syndrome, which means they never want to grow up. The older they get, the younger the girls they want. It's an issue. So What? We were 22, 23 probably, and we were on this boat day with this group of daddies. And one of the daddies on the boat, we had not met yet, the one that got me pregnant. But we'll get back to it.

[Alex]

So talkative today. What is going on? What is happening? I'm like, overwhelmed. Please tell me more.

[Hallie]

So we're on this boat with this man in this man. He is not the hottest man, but he's charismatic and, like, cute. And it ended up he had a third leg later. But we would find that out later in the story.

[Alex]

He is cute.

[Hallie]

Wait, I think he's cute. He's my favorite out of all the daddies. And he has potential. But I think he had like a girlfriend that whole time.

[Alex]

Maybe.

[Hallie]

Remember that girl, oh, we saw at Coachella?

[Alex]

You're right, he did have a girlfriend. Yeah, the whole time. But we didn't know.

[Hallie]

Like, they're all like kind of bad people. But, like, we didn't know.

[Alex]

Terrible.

[Hallie]

We were naive little 23 year olds. And so we're just like talking on the back of this yacht, you know, Lauren's like kind of just listening in and he's like telling me how good in bed he is. And I was like telling him how good in bed I am because that's.

[Alex]

Like a little short. So, like, I was like, kind of like apprehensive. I was like.

[Hallie]

He was a short king. But like, sometimes the short guys, they're usually sneaky.

[Alex]

Third leg sneaky.

[Hallie]

Yeah. Which he was one of them. So he started showing me his sex tapes, like, to like, for proof.

[Alex]

Oh, yes, I remember this.

[Hallie]

Do you remember this?

[Alex]

I remember this. He wouldn't show me, though. I was like, the fuck?

[Hallie]

Oh, yeah. He was showing me this exact. This random hooker and I was like, this is just not doing what you think it's doing for me. But whatever, nonetheless, it ended up actually doing it for me. Yeah, actually, I don't know what I'm talking about. That same night, we went to 11 and we went with a group of daddies and it was like my college friends and like all of us were just like kumbaya ing. And you know, I love strip clubs. I really do. I wouldn't consider 11 a real strip club. Like compared to like the ones in Vegas. I mean that's a whole other episode. But like I love a strip club.

[Alex]

We were actually, we were talking about this yesterday. Like I'm the type of girl where if I'm in a strip club and you put a stripper on me, like I'm a little uncomfortable. I don't know what to do with my hands. I don't know if I look her in the eyes, like I don't know what to do.

[Hallie]

I turn into like a, like is.

[Alex]

Like licking her, biting her tits. Like she's like so into it. I turn like, I kind of turn.

[Hallie]

Into a fuck boy. Like a picture. Frontwards, hat on. It's like I turn it around, become Justin Bieber at the strip club.

[Alex]

You get.

[Hallie]

So I get like aura. Yeah, I get like in like the zone. Anyways, this guy wanted to go to the private room at the strip club and I was like intrigued because I do love strippers and I have appreciation for the female body. So I was like intrigued by their bbl, you know, like we like, we.

[Alex]

Used to poke them. Yeah, the ones in Vegas are like insane. They're like just like plastic. So one time like me and Halle both trying to like grab a stripper.

[Hallie]

We feel it, we're like poking it. Broke a hand.

[Alex]

We started like talking to her about it too. We were like. So like tell us how was the surgery?

[Hallie]

No, literally once I gave one of the strippers like my dad's like she was giving me a lap dance and she was telling me her life story and how she wanted to like get into real estate. And I gave her my dad's email.

[Alex]

Shut the up.

[Hallie]

I was like email my.

[Alex]

She email him?

[Hallie]

I think so.

[Alex]

Yeah. Like met your daughter at 11.

[Hallie]

Yeah. Tatiana11.com. But anyways, we went to this private room and I think private rooms are probably extremely expensive. I don't know, like a couple grand at least.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Cuz you're paying for a private experience. You can get room service to the private room. Like when I went up there with a guy, like he both gave the girl, gave us both laugh dances as we were like eating chicken nuggets. I remember that. But they like offer other services. Like what he like gave the guy was with a hand job.

[Alex]

Wait, what?

[Hallie]

She, she, she gave him a hand job like right in front of me as like we're making out the stripper. So I'm like having a three way with this stripper essentially like a Light one. Like a light padded one. And then she left. And then I gave him blowjob in the private room at 11 so that.

[Alex]

You guys just got to stay in there.

[Hallie]

Yeah, she was like a fluffer. What do they call a fluff?

[Alex]

A fluffer.

[Hallie]

A fluffer.

[Alex]

A fluffer. She fluffed him up for you.

[Hallie]

The stripper fluffed me, and then I socked him sideways into fruition.

[Steve Buscemi]

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Mario's Bistro.

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[Graydon]

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[Alex]

I get to cut lines.

[Lauren]

Oh, right this way.

[Graydon]

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[Hallie]

I was able to buy reserve tickets.

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[Hallie]

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[Lauren]

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[Alex]

Whenever I go to with Halle to 11, like, I always, like, I'm always at one point, like, where? Where is she? She has left with a daddy to. To some private room. And I'm like, okay, so now I have to leave. And then you walk out of 11 and there's like, club space line.

[Hallie]

And there's so many. We have to talk about club space.

[Alex]

Yeah. And there's the 11 line of people. And I'm like, try. You can't get a car. So I'm like, walking the streets of Brickle.

[Hallie]

I want you to tell your space story. Have I told location a location? Yes.

[Alex]

Have I talked about it before? I'll talk about it again because it's honestly so true.

[Hallie]

Well, one in Rome. We're in Miami. Just tell the ski story. And then I have my own space stories. This is not a place. I mean, I'm fingered on the stage. But you start.

[Alex]

Okay, I'll start. Okay. We went to space.

[Hallie]

First explain what space is for people that don't know or don't understand.

[Alex]

That's fair. Okay. Space is, like, one of, like, the biggest, like, I would honestly say almost warehouse, like, deep House, music venues. There's like four, there's like three floors. There's like all these like vendor, like, like clothing vendors downstairs. You like make your way up like a sketchy ass spiral and then you like get to like the club. We also showed up at 6pm like, club space is open until like 6am Yeah, 6am we showed up at 6pm empty. It was you, me, our friend Ellie we were living with at the time. And then like a few guys and the Norwegians. I was the only one. All the Norwegians. I was the only one that like had a boyfriend within, I don't know, 20 minutes.

[Hallie]

Like, it's a bad thing. I was the only one that had a boyfriend. Okay.

[Alex]

It was a bad thing in that moment because everyone starts making out. Everyone started making out. And I'm like sitting there basically by myself. I look at Halle at one point and I was like, I. I like, can you make out with me?

[Hallie]

No. We were on Make Out With Me. We were on lots of ecstasy. Yeah, lots, like, lots of it.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

And when you're on ecstasy, like even like a simple brush of your arm, like, feels like a small orgasm.

[Alex]

Yeah. So you guys were all loving it.

[Hallie]

And we were all just like loving the music. You're feeling the vibe and just like want to be touched. And we were all sucking on those Light Pops. All our mouths were blue. We had a charcuterie board. Someone ordered caviar. It was insane. Insane.

[Alex]

Like our. Our outfits were ridiculous. But everyone took all, took, all took ecstasy.

[Hallie]

And you took a lot.

[Alex]

Well, we started out, they're like these like aliens. They're the aliens.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Alex]

And to be fair, haven't done it since because it's.

[Hallie]

I was so traumatized, I'd do it again.

[Alex]

Everyone took these aliens and like all of a sudden everyone's feeling it and I'm like, nothing's changed for me. So. But I also, to be fair, gave it like 10 minutes.

[Hallie]

You gave it 10 minutes and you said, I want another ecstasy, please. It's not working. It's not hitting the blood stream.

[Alex]

It's like, it's not working.

[Hallie]

And we were like pro making out with people so we couldn't really notice that you wanted to make that decision. I wish I, you, like, had ran that through one of us because you know nothing about drugs. You don't do drugs. You don't do any of that.

[Alex]

No.

[Hallie]

You didn't ask anyone. You said, I'm taking another ecstasy now and let's double it and give it to the next one.

[Alex]

Yeah. And I. Oh, my God.

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah.

[Alex]

And I. So I take this ecstasy, this ecstasy. I take the second one and like, all of a sudden, everyone went black.

[Hallie]

You're in space.

[Alex]

I was literally in space. The room went black. And I just remember, like, this was honestly one of the. It was one of the scariest experiences of my life. And I. It was black. And you have to, like, I. I don't even know how I got to the bathroom. I. I genuinely don't know how I got there. I just remember running past, like, a line of, like, 50 girls. Like, there was like a huge ass line for the bathroom. Somehow some way, like, a stall was open. Like, I think a girl just exited a stall. And I ran in and I got. I was like, throwing up for like a solid 20 minutes while I was hallucinating.

[Hallie]

You don't hallucinate on XD.

[Alex]

I was hallucinating. You just feel I was hallucinating. I thought that there was someone in the stall with me. And I had just, like, punted her out of the way to throw up.

[Hallie]

Starting to see aliens.

[Alex]

So I started, like, turning around in the stall, like, apologizing. I'm not kidding. Like, I was like, I'm so sorry. Like, I'm so sorry I took this from you. I'm so sorry.

[Hallie]

To, like, no one was there.

[Alex]

No one was there.

[Hallie]

It was like your reflection.

[Alex]

It was so bad.

[Hallie]

And I had no idea what was going on.

[Alex]

You were like, getting finger blasted on the dance floor.

[Hallie]

Yeah, it felt really good because I was on the normal amount of ecstasy. And that same night, I remember it so clearly, I went back with, yeah, what's this?

[Alex]

Norwegian?

[Hallie]

And I was ready to jump this man's bones because we were both, like, really feeling it. And I was like, okay, you can record it. Which is something I, like, need to stop doing. I keep, like, telling guys.

[Alex]

Like, at least I do with my boyfriend. You.

[Hallie]

No, I tell every guy. I'm like, please record me. I perform better on camera. Which is probably why I'm in this industry. Look at all the cameras that are in front of us right now. I'm ready to perform. So this guy records me. And when you're on X, see, like, I don't know about you, but either you're, like, biting the inside of your cheeks or your jaw is like, going kind of like you're coked out your jaws. My jaw was dislocated. I swear that was the beginning of my TMJ journey, literally. And my mouth is blue. Because all you want to do is like, suck on lollipops. So I look back at the footage as one does the next day. Like, it's film. Yeah, it's film. I gotta know where it's. Critique the areas. This film was the most insane thing I've ever seen in my whole entire life. My jaw. The guy's like, on top of me. My, like, I'm wearing that leather red dress.

[Alex]

Yes.

[Hallie]

My mouth is blue from like the 19 lollipops I've been sucking on. And my jaw is just going back and forth like this. Like, I have to show you this video. Wait, not you guys. I was talking to my gay producer.

[Alex]

I will, however, give you a picture of the red leather vegan dress that we wore in. We had 80 degree Miami weather.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Alex]

I was wearing.

[Hallie]

It was the least hot video I've ever seen. It looked like this man had found, like a crackhead and was fucking her.

[Alex]

I was wearing her, like, letterman jacket and like, snakeskin red knee high boots. Like, we looked fucking ridiculous.

[Hallie]

We thought we ate too. We. The photos we took before our style evolution needs to be studied. I could have a whole episode on how different our style is. And you know, I'm not good at warm weather. I worked with a stylist this weekend because I know I'm not good at packing for warm weather. I look back at some of our Miami outfits or even our outfits that we wore in Nantucket. Anything in a warmer climate. We do not know what to do. Back in 2022, we did not know we looked like.

[Alex]

Halle wore leather pants to the beach with, like, probably her Amina Wadi boots.

[Hallie]

And they were like fake leather.

[Alex]

And I wore like fake knockoff, like, Jordan dunks.

[Hallie]

That was during the era where I just started social media. And anything that was gifted to me I thought was sick. I would wear it all. Once I got gifted, like, this rainbow ass necklace. I want to take it off. And everyone thought it was lgbtq and I was like, wait, no, I just got gifted. It's like, me, because I'm gonna be.

[Alex]

Right now, like, I go anywhere with Halle and I start putting on all of the gifting, like, immediately. Like, the second we walk in the room, I'm like in the PJs that are, like, left on the beds.

[Hallie]

No. Yeah. Lauren loves pr. One thing about Lauren is she loves.

[Alex]

Yeah. If you have. If my friends have pr, I am taking it.

[Hallie]

Sends. Send Lauren some PR guys.

[Alex]

Yeah, don't. Don't send it to Hallelujah. Send it to me. Okay. But put it all on at once.

[Hallie]

I wouldn't take off that rainbow necklace for a while until, like, people started being like, I think they sent it.

[Alex]

To you because they thought you were bi.

[Hallie]

I was kind of going through an era.

[Alex]

You were bi? Curious.

[Hallie]

I was bi curious. I'm always a little bit curious. But like, yeah, it makes life more interesting sometimes.

[Alex]

We're very.

[Hallie]

I don't want to be labeled.

[Alex]

We've actually been very touchy recently. We're not normally very touchy.

[Hallie]

When was I awake?

[Alex]

No, like, I remember. Like, we don't hug. Like, we don't hug. You're not a hugger?

[Hallie]

Like, no, I have. Emotionally, though.

[Alex]

You have been hugging me and you have been touching me. I'm just gonna put it out there.

[Hallie]

Not you, like, picking up on that.

[Alex]

Yeah. Because it's very, like, it's sweet. I'm like, oh, I'm very. She loves me. But like, every time she does that, she's like, wait, I can't do that. People are gonna think that we're in. We're together.

[Hallie]

Well, compared to, like, some of the things we've seen through some of the people. You can give me a hug and I won't blink an eye. Now at least you're not trying to, like, finger blast you finger blast me at the function.

[Alex]

Maybe later.

[Hallie]

We've seen it all. What else do we have to do today?

[Alex]

Wait, I didn't finish my own. Well.

[Hallie]

Oh, sorry.

[Alex]

Oh, my God. On my own wall story. My space story.

[Hallie]

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.

[Alex]

You went to have sex?

[Hallie]

Yeah, I.

[Alex]

The girl who had just died from ecstasy decided to go buy all space merch and show up to a you Miami party in a tie dye space hat, a tie dye space sweatshirt and red snakeskin boots and sit on the couch.

[Hallie]

Like, that was diabolical.

[Alex]

Alone.

[Hallie]

I forgot about that. I don't know. How did I meet you after? I. I think so. Wait, I think I did.

[Alex]

I think you did. I, like, don't know why I was there. Like, it was normal people. And then I looked like a. Like if. If any of you were there and if any of you remember a girl on the couch in a dyed ICE sweatshirt, that was me.

[Hallie]

It was hot as it was humid as it was hurricane season. And you're in the most unfriendly outfit. Like you were wearing a beanie.

[Alex]

I was wearing a beanie. And then the next day, I felt like I. Oh.

[Hallie]

Oh.

[Alex]

I also couldn't fall. Fall asleep that night, so I had to, like, watch. I had to watch to like, put myself to bed. And then the next day, I just decided I needed Dior sneakers and a burger. So I went and I did that, and I felt much better while you were. The whole time, you were still having sex. I know you were still having sex.

[Hallie]

That man, like a jungle jam. Yeah, he was hot. I wish I gave him a little more thought.

[Alex]

I think he's, like.

[Hallie]

I think he's married now, but miss you call me. No, I think he went back to Norway or Norwegian. What is it called? Norwegian.

[Alex]

Norway.

[Hallie]

Norway. That was.

[Alex]

That was close.

[Hallie]

Yeah, but, like, that was an interesting era. But I was also, like. I was also, like, hooking up with someone else during this time. Yeah, but, like, we did not have a label at all.

[Alex]

Yeah, I was, I think.

[Hallie]

And that's why you were pushing me into the Norwegians to, like, help me, like, you know, not put all my eggs in one basket, which is something I have an issue with.

[Alex]

I try. I really try and help you there.

[Hallie]

But, like, I put all my eggs in one basket very quickly. Like, if I hook up with someone and I like them right off the bat, like, I'm not gonna be hooking up with other people because I don't have interest in doing that.

[Alex]

No, you, like. I don't even know what to call it. So unique.

[Hallie]

I'm so unique. That's the kindest way to put it. Thank you, Lauren. But, like, when you hook up with someone and you like them, I'm not gonna. Joe and Schmo and Bo.

[Alex]

No, I know. And, like, I have the same. I do the same thing.

[Hallie]

I think it's a normal thing to do. I think I'd be a sociopath. I agree to not y way. Yes.

[Alex]

But, like, what do you do different about it?

[Hallie]

I plan our future in my head. No, I'm kidding. I think I romanticize, like, what the potential could be. Even when they're not giving me what it's not, like, on paper yet. I'm, like, thinking about, oh, he could improve these areas, and, like, he could do this, and he could. This could be so good in this area. I just have to give it a little more patience. And I, like, always give men the benefit of the doubt to a fault, and then I romanticize something that doesn't even exist.

[Alex]

I think. I think. I think it's, like, a normal thing, but I think what you do is you romanticize it so quickly.

[Hallie]

Like, hyper fixate.

[Alex]

Yeah. Like, if I like hooking up with someone, like, it takes me, like, two months of, like, only of, like, Hooking up with that person to be like, okay, like the thing can be something.

[Hallie]

With some people, I don't even know if I like them or I just want them to like me.

[Alex]

No, you also like the. You get it. You get. I say this, you get diplomatized. Like, you might like the person have bad sex and then you're like.

[Hallie]

Or they're dumb. I don't like dumb money. We talked about that.

[Alex]

But if they have a. If they're good in bed, you like you. You are quick to be like. Because you want, you want to keep having. You want that sex.

[Hallie]

Yeah, you have.

[Alex]

You do that for sure. I think. Yeah, yeah, you get. I think that's your thing is you get diplomatized. Like everyone romanticizes everything, but you get.

[Hallie]

But I also overthink and I like translate everything as like a form of rejection. And then like that like hits a nerve with me.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

So like you, if someone is like, hit me up. Or if everything's not like in my control and I don't have the upper hand, I will focus on like minute details of like what they maybe are doing wrong, even if it's probably nothing. Like I'm just like over analyzing everything and everything and to like create fake scenarios and I'm like mad at them. I'm like, I'm like, you wrong me.

[Alex]

I think you like a chase. You doesn't like a chase everyone.

[Hallie]

That's my only form of cardio these days.

[Alex]

Some people don't. But like, I. I'm like, I wanna, like, if you don't want me, like, I will make you want me. That is my like and you are the same.

[Hallie]

It's a hobby. My, my hobby is not dating. It's chasing.

[Alex]

It's chasing. Like, I love a good chase too. Yeah, I think most girls do. And if you. The normal ones, like, God bless you. Good for you. You figured it out. You figured it out.

[Hallie]

What medication are you on to stabilize your mood? Because I want that DM Me like.

[Alex]

I actually like, want to know now. Is this like a universal thing? Every girl loves a chase.

[Hallie]

Yeah, it's the guys cat, mouse. It's Tom and Jerry. Wait, what is that a movie? Tom and Jerry. No. Yeah, that's why it made it an interesting cartoon. Because the cat, the mouse, yeah, that's.

[Alex]

What I used to watch. But the Russian version of it, what was it called?

[Hallie]

What was it called?

[Alex]

Except it was a wolf chasing a rabbit.

[Hallie]

Same thing. A tail is all the time. The wolf chasing the rabbit all over the world. But I want to Be the wolf and not the rabbit. You know, I want to be the cat, not the mouse. They chase each other, though. Wait, but, like, one of them is a more alpha animal.

[Alex]

Why am I thinking. Who would we. Who are we? We're the ones. We're the ones chasing.

[Hallie]

You wear the pants.

[Alex]

So we're the.

[Hallie]

In your relationship?

[Alex]

In my current one, yeah. Yeah.

[Hallie]

Like, I'm like, do I want to wear the pants, or do I just want someone to help me put my pants on?

[Alex]

Let me wear the pants. I think you want. I think you. No, I think I want to be taken care of.

[Hallie]

But I. I want to, like, tell also people to, like, tell guy to shut the up.

[Alex]

Yeah. Like, I wear the pants in the sense of, like, I think. I think hold hands here. I think we both want to be taken care of.

[Hallie]

And if someone isn't taking care of me, I'll have Lauren's boyfriend.

[Alex]

Yeah. I'm like, we don't want it.

[Hallie]

We always talk about, like, I'm gonna be, like, the drunk aunt, you know, that lives in their beautiful home in Connecticut in the attic. And, like, we'll go on, like, vacations. I mean, Jordan has an amazing job. Jordan's gonna have, like, so much wealth, and we're gonna go to San Tropez, and he's, like, gonna be like, girls, just go on a shopping spree. Because I'll be, like, single and 40 and be like, can I have a bag, too? Can I have a pair of shoes, too? And Jordan, like, not a problem. It's just a dip in the bucket.

[Alex]

Won't even notice by the time this episode comes out. Guys, Jordan takes his massive exam on Monday that he's been studying for.

[Hallie]

I know. You got to give him a sake McGee for that.

[Alex]

I know I will. He, like, actually might get one for me standing up.

[Hallie]

Oh, standing up.

[Alex]

Yeah. That's what we were just talking about. I only like to do it standing up.

[Hallie]

You only like to give and explain this to me. You like to get skull.

[Alex]

Is that my issue? Yeah.

[Hallie]

And getting soft is when a guy forcibly grabs your face and uses it as, like, a flashlight almost. Okay, well, like, you, like, romantic skull.

[Alex]

You like skull skull stroking.

[Hallie]

We'll call it skull making love.

[Alex]

Yeah. You're, like, literally, like.

[Hallie]

Yeah. I'm like, I want it poking out the back of my brain. I want brain damage from this.

[Alex]

We're different in that sense. But that's sweet for you. For you.

[Hallie]

No, literally.

[Alex]

But yeah, he'll. He'll take his exam on Monday, so we'll Find out, guys. Hopefully.

[Venmo Advertiser]

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[Podcast Host]

Hi, this is Steve Buscemi. You know, the actor. Well, now I'm an actor and podcast host from Piece of Work Entertainment and Campside Media in association with Olive Productions, comes Big Time, an Apple original podcast. Each episode follows the story of one misfit with big dreams who isn't afraid to bend a few rules or take a shortcut to get there.

[Steve Buscemi]

Well, who steals bees?

[Alex]

I was duped.

[Lauren]

I shoot you in the leg.

[Podcast Host]

This is Big Time. Follow and listen on Apple podcasts.

[Hallie]

Let's go back to the Miami penthouse. It was the most dangerous place in Miami. I'm not even kidding.

[Alex]

Holly. Holly, remember we would turn the TV into strobe lights for four people. For four people. It was me, you, Ellie, Kyle, Kyle's friend. And we would fucking turn all the lights down and put the TV on and put it on YouTube. Strobe light.

[Hallie]

Hour.

[Alex]

Hour.

[Hallie]

I feel like that's a universal experience. My face is, like, sterilized. Why? I would actually accidentally do the K instead of the other stuff. Oh, yeah.

[Alex]

We were like, oh, these guys used to be like Ketch or Coke.

[Hallie]

The Norwegians, remember?

[Alex]

And he'd like, hold two white bags up.

[Hallie]

We had, like, ketamine nicknames. Katorin. I was Cataly.

[Alex]

I'm dead Cataly.

[Hallie]

Like, I don't like. No, I do not like K. I only have done K on accident. I don't like to feel like I'm floating.

[Alex]

I, like, never, I never, like, try. I'm so scared of everything. Like, I'm the worst.

[Hallie]

I do like poppers, though.

[Alex]

Wait, we did poppers this weekend?

[Hallie]

Yeah, we did poppers. I want to include those in my new sex routine.

[Alex]

Yeah, I, like, used to have, like, whip it Mondays at school. We would watch Game of Thrones with, like, all the, like, whip it canisters in front of us, like, every, like, 20 minutes. We'd been.

[Hallie]

I've never done a whip it. They scare me.

[Alex]

Oh, my God.

[Hallie]

What?

[Alex]

Yeah, you would love a whip it.

[Hallie]

No, I, I, it feels like a bad, like. Wait, so you have tried nicotine High.

[Alex]

Have you tried one?

[Hallie]

No, I just know exactly what they look like. I used to like drink a little bit. We used to have all those like little parties and everyone was doing whip bits and like the guys would like do a massive whip it and just like fall backwards. And I was like, this looks not fun.

[Alex]

Yeah. But like wait.

[Hallie]

Hot take. You look like you're dying. Why do I want to do this?

[Alex]

I don't know why we like. I don't even. And me being scared of everything. I was like, yeah, give me, give me, give me 14.

[Hallie]

Give me 14 of those.

[Alex]

Take all them. But no, we did poppers this weekend and it was actually really nice. I was really scared.

[Hallie]

Yeah, really nice. Let's go back to our Miami. Yeah. We get a little sidetracked. Sorry. We. We would have. There was a guy I was seeing. So we'd have them over.

[Alex]

They would come too.

[Hallie]

They would come to sometimes.

[Alex]

Yeah. And we would. You were into house music then? Cuz we would rip house music. And like I like. Yeah. Cuz like everyone around you was into house.

[Hallie]

Yeah. The warehouse.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Parties.

[Alex]

This was like.

[Hallie]

I never went to that warehouse party cuz I Ubered 2 1/2 hours away for Jake. But continue.

[Alex]

Oh, the one that I'm talking about, that was like so sick. Oh, you missed the best night of my life.

[Hallie]

Tell me about it.

[Alex]

Minus coach. Minus that. Coachella.

[Hallie]

Paint the picture for me and our friend this.

[Alex]

During this time in Miami, like everything was still closed. So there was this like group, I guess that put together these like secret warehouse parties and you would get a text message with a location on like a Friday night, which is actually kind of sick. And they would like. They weren't even this one that you didn't go to. It was like. It was like a house, but it was a sketchy house. Like it. It was literally in the middle of nowhere. Got a text message, showed up. It was like a house backyard and then a back house. The front house was vendors, clothing, like, like vintage whatever backyard, massive pool, bar, whatever. And then the back house was like sick dj. Like honestly, I think, I think like. I mean, I. For some reason I feel like Johnson played there one night. Like they were like doing like DJs and it was insane. And like it was just like.

[Hallie]

It's like so you're seen.

[Alex]

So my scene, we have different. Yeah.

[Hallie]

Ideal scenes.

[Alex]

Well, what is your ideal scene?

[Hallie]

Like I love kind of like a socialista. I like words in my music. I like to vibe. I like to not just be like, you're Very. Very Miami. You would love the Miami scene.

[Alex]

I would love. Yeah. But like not space like cool. Clarify.

[Hallie]

I did have fun last night. I mean, if I had epilepsy, it wouldn't be great or conducive.

[Alex]

That was like 2 uns for me. There was one song I was like.

[Hallie]

Didn'T I just wish our section was like 90 were cleared out.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Graydon]

There.

[Hallie]

I don't know what happened there.

[Alex]

No, it's too many people.

[Hallie]

Too many people. And just. I don't like getting pushed. That's another thing. But like usually when there's unsung music, the music you like. Yeah, it's a lot of pushing.

[Alex]

But I like.

[Hallie]

Don't touch me.

[Alex]

I like what she just did. Like, like who shame our go.

[Hallie]

Like I like is a very nice members only. I know but they just not.

[Alex]

They just had an UNS night.

[Hallie]

Did you just compare it to 11?

[Alex]

No, I was saying I like. I like more of like a. Yeah. Private party. Like when we go to Europe, you will understand. You will come home an unseense girl. Like it is. So it's.

[Graydon]

No.

[Hallie]

I need my euro trip. We're planning a little bit of a Euro trip this summer.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

And like our new running trope is like joke is this would never happen. But Mallorca. No.

[Alex]

Yeah, we're going to Spain this summer.

[Hallie]

Yeah. It's gonna be fun. Yeah, it's gonna be maybe Saint Tropez.

[Alex]

I think we should go.

[Hallie]

I've never had a European summer.

[Alex]

You've never been to Europe?

[Hallie]

I've been to Europe. That's.

[Alex]

Oh, you went to Amsterdam.

[Hallie]

Yeah, I went to Amsterdam. Paris.

[Alex]

When? When? When did you go to Paris?

[Hallie]

Years ago. Oh, Germany for Oktoberfest. When you were younger still in my lifetime.

[Alex]

I know. For some reason I thought you never been to Europe.

[Hallie]

In my adult life. Where I can like go alone, enjoy it with my friends. It's not like school related or brand trip related. No, I really had no European experience.

[Alex]

But you've been to Europe. For some reason I thought you had never been. Maybe that's someone else.

[Hallie]

Yeah, someone else.

[Alex]

Somebody. Oh, she's talking about. Maybe it's great.

[Hallie]

Maybe I. I can't picture him like at the Eiffel Tower. Imagine the Eiffel Tower. He is the Eiffel Tower. Yeah. Brayden was funny last night, guys. He was supposed to be. Obviously he's part of this little. Is he like a situation? He was up until 6am the one thing about Graydon, we were just like post gaming the post game.

[Alex]

He Never wants to go home.

[Hallie]

One thing about grading, he never wants the party to end. He gets upset. It was 6am we were leaving fucking Lauren's room, and he goes, can I just, like, come to him for another 10 minutes? I was like, no. I was like, granny, you need to go to bed. We have to talk tomorrow. We have to host an event tomorrow.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

He, like, guessed with me, people. It's Saturday tomorrow.

[Alex]

The other night, we, like, made him go home. It was, like, 3am we made him go home. He was, like, texting us for, like, 20 minutes, being like, I'm so sad.

[Hallie]

He was in the bed.

[Alex]

Literally, go to bed. He, like, wouldn't go to the bathroom yesterday at 11 because he was like. He kept looking at me. He's like, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I was like, okay.

[Hallie]

He kept telling me the same thing.

[Alex]

No, he did not leave the table. He would not leave to go to the bathroom.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Alex]

He's being so funny.

[Hallie]

I feel like we should, like, go wake grading up.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Maybe go jet skiing. Maybe go have a dirty martini in the middle of the day. Like, I want to hear how great and tonight went to. From his perspective, if he can even verbalize that. So let's just cut to that and do that.

[Alex]

Okay.

[Hallie]

Go get him.

[Alex]

Yeah, let's go.

[Venmo Advertiser]

With the Venmo debit card, you can turn the mini golf outing your co workers paid you back for into a trip to Miami with your best friend, earning you up to 5% cash back. Use Venmo to pay for the things you love to do. Visit Venmo Me Devit to learn more. The Venmo Mastercard is issued by the Bancorp Bank N.A. pursuant to license by Mastercard International, Inc. Terms apply. Dosh cashback, term supply.

[Podcast Host]

Hi, this is Steve Buscemi. You know, the actor. Well, now I'm an actor and podcast host. From Piece of Work Entertainment and Campside Media in association with Olive Productions, comes Big Time, an Apple original podcast. Each episode follows the story of one misfit with big dreams who isn't afraid to bend a few rules or take a shortcut to get there.

[Steve Buscemi]

Well, who steals bees?

[Alex]

I was duped.

[Lauren]

I shoot you in the leg.

[Podcast Host]

This is big time. Follow and listen on Apple Podcasts.

[Hallie]

Okay, Freaks of the fucking week. I just woke up, Graydon.

[Lauren]

I'm here. I'm literally so hungover. I'm, like, floating in time and space, and my head feels like a fucking balloon.

[Hallie]

I found you at the pool. There was no.

[Lauren]

There was no way.

[Hallie]

There was no space. In your head for thoughts.

[Lauren]

There's nothing in my head. If you spoke to me today, I apologize because I was probably alright.

[Hallie]

This is what happened last night. You did not want to go to bed. We were like, 6am post gaming. The post game. Alex told us off. She was like, everyone needs to go to bed. We have another night. We have another day to ensue. And you were like, no, like, let's post game. And then, like, we had to call night cuz literally, Lauren had to go to the airport.

[Lauren]

Sun was rising.

[Hallie]

The sun was rising.

[Alex]

How much longer did you guys stay up until, like, when I went to.

[Hallie]

Bed, like, two hours.

[Alex]

You went to bed at 4 and you went.

[Hallie]

We're up to like, 6.

[Lauren]

Yeah, I want to bet at 7.

[Alex]

But what were you doing by yourself?

[Lauren]

No, like, I literally am a maniac at night. It's crazy.

[Hallie]

All right, tell us what happened in your point of view because you were feeling yourself last night.

[Lauren]

I just never want to go home. And then I do this thing where I start whining like a. Like a literal baby. I'll be like, I don't want to go home. And Howie's like, shut up, twink. You're going home.

[Alex]

No.

[Hallie]

He goes, let's do another 10 minutes in your bedroom. I go, we didn't remember that.

[Lauren]

You're like, for what?

[Hallie]

All right, so what do we do today? I want you to walk us through the day. I did a lot of talking on this podcast already. I want you to walk us through.

[Alex]

For hours before you woke up.

[Lauren]

Halle's torturing me today.

[Hallie]

I literally haven't seen you all day. You Woke up at 2. We did very light lifting.

[Lauren]

I woke up at 1 today.

[Hallie]

We.

[Lauren]

Well, we did different things. Hallie got in a jet ski accident.

[Hallie]

I accidentally hit Alex's husband.

[Lauren]

Two jet skis.

[Hallie]

It was a collision.

[Alex]

I can't even do it well.

[Hallie]

Aaron was trying to get content and I was looking at him.

[Alex]

Honestly, watching Hallie on a jet ski is. Is frightening. She has no fear. And you go as fast as possible.

[Hallie]

I, like, honestly want a wave to take me out.

[Lauren]

We love a jet ski. Remember in Palm beach when you guys were. When you and Lutz were working and Halle and I were just on the jet ski. 12 hours.

[Alex]

Yeah, but see, that's better. The ocean jet ski is scary because the waves are so big.

[Lauren]

No, that's why it's fun how I.

[Alex]

Almost killed, like, the train or two.

[Hallie]

He almost killed me. Like, I was like, the victim here. No, neither of those accents.

[Alex]

From my perspective, Halle was like this the whole time.

[Hallie]

And there was paparazzi all over the beach. I will say this.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

And my tit fell out.

[Alex]

I hope they got that.

[Hallie]

And the lady was like, oh, yeah.

[Alex]

She did help you. That was sweet.

[Hallie]

And then I look over and the paparazzi's, like, snapping, and I'm like, oh, my whole fake yabo is gonna be on the daily mail.

[Lauren]

What if your nipples on daily tomorrow?

[Hallie]

Honestly, Tag me.

[Lauren]

I would die.

[Hallie]

But anyways, we have a whole crowd in this room right now.

[Alex]

Say hi. Hi.

[Hallie]

Look at these people. We have Jesse. We have Sammy. Sammy and Maria were making out all night last night. I want to put them in the hot seat.

[Alex]

I think you guys need to come in. Let's talk about it.

[Hallie]

Okay. So this is the new couple. They're on the pause. Introduce yourselves.

[Graydon]

Hi, I'm Maria Georgeous.

[H]

I'm Sammy, Halle's brother.

[Hallie]

Yeah. Okay. So I just did. At an unwell activation, we just did, like, a little, like, teenies and drinks and, like, schmoozing with the crowd. And everyone wrote in some questions I could answer on extra dirty. So I thought it'd be fun if Maria and Sammy would give some intel. Well on these questions. I haven't read them yet.

[Graydon]

Okay. Is there a limit to homie hopping?

[Hallie]

No. One? Yes. Yes.

[Graydon]

Actually, none. I think you shouldn't do it.

[H]

Yeah, Literally.

[Graydon]

Because it's too close to the friend group. You're. It's just messy. How are you gonna walk into a room and know that you more than one person? It's just uncomfortable. I wouldn't want to do it. Halle, what's your answer?

[Hallie]

The limit does not exist.

[Graydon]

I'm dead.

[Hallie]

No.

[Graydon]

Well, I don't think, like, who really.

[Hallie]

Wants to homie hop? I don't, like, pick the best one on the front group and go from there.

[Graydon]

Yes. That sounds more like it.

[Hallie]

Sammy, what do you think about homie hopping from a guy's perspective?

[H]

Yeah, I know a couple homie hoppers.

[Hallie]

But guys homie hop, too.

[H]

Guys homie hop.

[Hallie]

I know guys that go from girl to girl in, like, circles of girls. Yeah. Jesse, Jesse, Jesse, Jesse. Jesse's the OG Homie hopper. I'm looking you. Jesse saw you. Yeah. He's like, I'm in Miami, baby.

[Graydon]

I lost the love of my life because I his roommate. We were broken up, though. How do I get him back?

[H]

So over.

[Graydon]

It's so over. Yeah. The guy plays with him.

[H]

The guy has no self respect.

[Hallie]

Whoever wrote that is probably, like, 20 years old. And, like, when you're 20. You think everyone's the love of your life, right? You think it's the end all be all and it's.

[Graydon]

But if he was the love of you. Let's just say they're not 20. It was the love of your life. He clearly wasn't enough. If you can. His roommate.

[Hallie]

Wait, she the roommate too? Wait, I didn't get that far.

[Graydon]

Wait right here.

[H]

That was the question.

[Graydon]

Because I his roommate. And then in brackets, we were broken up though.

[H]

Well, clearly he wasn't the love of her life.

[Hallie]

Why would she his roommate if she was like, that's the last person I would. I. The dad before the room. Me. They live together. They share a bathroom.

[Graydon]

Yeah, that. Yeah, that's too messy. You're not gonna get him back. But what you can do is learn from this. For the next one, just don't. His roommate.

[Hallie]

Okay, who is this girl?

[Graydon]

I don't know. That's why I said we needed follow up.

[Hallie]

Like I need faces to these names.

[Graydon]

Okay. Okay. He goes to finger me with one finger. What do I do? What? Ask for a couple more fingers. You need at least three.

[Hallie]

Two plus three is insane. Maria, what are you doing?

[Graydon]

Is it insane? Two. I said. I said two at three.

[Hallie]

You might as well just get a dig at that point.

[Graydon]

That's what I'm saying. That was basically my answer. Okay, so next.

[Hallie]

Sorry, Sammy, I didn't mean you to hear that.

[H]

No, I didn't hear it. I was honestly zoned out.

[Hallie]

But like 3 is insane for an answer.

[Graydon]

I never.

[Hallie]

I mean, it's like actually six fingers.

[Graydon]

Guys. She was so appalled at one. So I said, okay, at least get three. I thought she might have wanted that.

[Hallie]

Well, one's like a tampon at that point.

[H]

Well, we have like a more wholesome question here, I guess. What was your favorite memory from the unwell weekend?

[Hallie]

Oh. Oh, that's cute.

[H]

Yeah, it's a nice question. It's a good one. I like that one. Oh, I'm starting probably making out Maria. I don't know. The first night, I think at least meeting me.

[Graydon]

You don't have to say you made out me. At least make it meeting me.

[H]

No, meeting you was definitely the highlight of my trip so far too. Yeah. And we're only halfway there, so plenty.

[Graydon]

More at the end of our trip.

[H]

The unwell trip. Yeah, but like, you know, we're here till Monday.

[Graydon]

I'm not. Oh, but I. I like your answer.

[H]

Unlucky me, you guys, but what's your.

[Graydon]

Oh, yeah, go, go. Continue.

[Hallie]

Me. I Told Carter this. It was like having everyone that, like, is. Was invited by Unwell. Like, under, like, the same roof umbrella, at the same dinner, same events.

[Graydon]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Just kind of vibing. I feel like Unwell is really good at curating, like, good groups of people that, like, can just, like, chill. It's been fun. Like, we had a good time. They crushed the events. Everything went super smoothly, I think. And I've. I could continue to drink. You know, I liked 11, but I wish it was, like, a little less crowded. I wish I got a slap dance. I wish I had the private room.

[Graydon]

Honestly, I did last night, and I regret it.

[Hallie]

What? What'd you do in the private room?

[Graydon]

I did.

[Hallie]

What? We went up.

[Graydon]

So this is what happened.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Graydon]

Last night I was a big mouth and I was like, I want to. I thought we were doing. I thought you were joking, but I was until your friend was like, I.

[H]

Don'T think you were.

[Graydon]

No, we went up to the Strip.

[Hallie]

We're like.

[Graydon]

We're brother and sister. She was like, oh, really? Like, she was loving it. And then next thing I know, I'm in the private room and I didn't expect it. And I was so scared. I was wondering where you were, and it was kind of sad that you left, but I was. I was in the private room.

[H]

That was on me.

[Graydon]

Yeah, that was on you. What the hell?

[H]

Well, you were dancing with strippers.

[Hallie]

Well, only, wait, I heard you were also cheating on Maria.

[Graydon]

What?

[H]

Me?

[Hallie]

Yeah, I heard you were into other baddies.

[H]

Said who? You.

[Graydon]

I didn't. I didn't. This is news to me. That's good to know that I got cheated on before I even dated the guy.

[Hallie]

You told me that.

[Graydon]

He told him.

[Hallie]

You told me that.

[H]

I did.

[Graydon]

I did.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Graydon]

No, wait.

[H]

Who are you looking at? Yeah, because your sunglasses.

[Hallie]

You. Me that he was giving other girls attention. You were like. Oh, he just, like, be. That was the first night.

[Graydon]

The first night?

[Hallie]

No.

[H]

Are you talking about. Oh, I thought you were talking about last night with the people from Boston.

[Graydon]

I mean, I.

[H]

We knew of them.

[Graydon]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Wait, were you guys at a different table at 11?

[H]

Yeah.

[Graydon]

No, we were at the same one.

[H]

No, we were at the same one.

[Graydon]

But you're different from. You wanted the lap dancing on. I willingly went with him to go to said lap dance, and I didn't know it was going to end up in a private room. I really. Guys. I only seen that in movies, I swear. And then.

[H]

What movie?

[Graydon]

I don't know. Anora. Have you seen it?

[Hallie]

Dora?

[Graydon]

Anora. No, it's actually really good. She was the stripper in the movie. Guys, it's so good you to watch anoret. It won awards. Guys. But wait, I don't think he was cheating on me. No, he was a good boy.

[Hallie]

No, no, he.

[H]

I was good last night. I was good. Yeah, we had fun.

[Graydon]

We did.

[H]

Last night was a great night.

[Graydon]

My ex boyfriend is now dating a stripper from 11, and my ex situationship is now with a big titty blonde. Am I the problem or is the met or is it the men that I choose?

[Hallie]

I mean, well, if your man's going.

[H]

I think that's just bad luck. That's just bad luck.

[Graydon]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

I mean, sometimes a big titty blonde comes across someone's desk and they have to just accept.

[H]

Yeah, I agree.

[Hallie]

I don't know what to tell this girl. She's done so for other people.

[H]

Yeah. Not myself.

[Graydon]

Good. Because I'm definitely not a big titty blonde. But okay, well, yeah, no, I'm so sorry that your boyfriend went for the big titty blonde. But I guess, like, like Halle said, when they come around, this can be distracting.

[Hallie]

This guy's probably 21. Feel legit, though. Like, this guy's probably like, oh, my God. Big tits, Milky, milky. Like, like I like. Guys get so distracted by tits.

[Graydon]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

I would just move on.

[Graydon]

Move on.

[Hallie]

All right, all right, Jesse, get on here.

[Graydon]

Well, thank you so much. Ingraden incoming. The homie Hopper himself.

[Hallie]

All right, guys, we brought on Jesse Solomon.

[Steve Buscemi]

Who the is Jesse Solomon?

[Hallie]

What would Jesse Solomon do?

[Steve Buscemi]

I would do bad things.

[Hallie]

Welcome to the hot show, Jesse.

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah, I feel like I got to bring it. Are you naughty with this crew? You know I'm naughty boy.

[Hallie]

He's like the naughty. Have you watched A season of Summer House?

[Steve Buscemi]

Have I? Yes.

[Hallie]

Have you? Have you?

[Lauren]

Yeah.

[Hallie]

Yeah.

[Steve Buscemi]

Oh, nice.

[Hallie]

I see the clips.

[Steve Buscemi]

Kind of a good show.

[Hallie]

No, it's a great show. I feel like you've been on your worst behavior, though. You're, like, cracking me up this season.

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah, thanks. It's, you know, once you get comfortable with the people in the house, it's easier to be yourself.

[Lauren]

Is it the people or the cameras? Like, do you feel like you forget about the cameras?

[Steve Buscemi]

You never fully forget, but. But you're there for 48 hours. Like, you'll let your guard down. Like I ripped ass. Which was enhanced by the audio, but, like, you forget and you just fart.

[Lauren]

Oh, my God.

[Steve Buscemi]

That's what they show, I would assume.

[Hallie]

I mean, there's cameras. There's cameras in your bedrooms.

[Steve Buscemi]

Right, yeah. There's no cameras in the bathroom, but if you go in the bathroom with somebody else, they can come in.

[Lauren]

Wait, so if you have sex with somebody, they're fully filming it?

[Steve Buscemi]

Yes.

[Hallie]

Have you had sex on camera?

[Steve Buscemi]

No. I got a BJ in the hot tub once on camera. Actually, no, the BJ wasn't in the hot tub. I. I made out with a girl in the hot tub and then we went back into my room and I got a bj.

[Hallie]

Was it a girl in the house?

[Lauren]

Ew, not the fist bump. You know I'm gay, right?

[Alex]

Just kidding.

[Steve Buscemi]

Wait, you're gay?

[Alex]

What?

[Lauren]

Okay, I'm street.

[Hallie]

Wait, so you got a BJ in the hot tub on this?

[Steve Buscemi]

Well, so I put, I put like a hat over the surveillance camera. And you see this camera like wiggling around. The guy's trying to like get the hat to fall off.

[Lauren]

Oh, cuz he's controlling it.

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah, they've got like a little joystick. They're all sitting in the basement like watching you.

[Lauren]

I like sticks going on.

[Hallie]

Fear could never be on a show like that. I would say something stupid or get an argument with someone. It would just like, wouldn't hit.

[Steve Buscemi]

I fear that you would be perfect for it actually.

[Hallie]

Yeah, in like a bad way where I'd be like the villain and people would hate me and I would get fucked on, but who cares?

[Steve Buscemi]

Well, your friends and family love you. Like that's what matters.

[Hallie]

Is that what you tell yourself?

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah. I try to completely detach from the trolls and the haters, you know, because I think I'm a good person.

[Hallie]

You are good. I would like to say that you're like one of my favorite people. Like, you're so down to earth, genuine good guy.

[Steve Buscemi]

Thanks.

[Hallie]

Tall, handsome and dress as well.

[Lauren]

I feel like I'm interrupting something.

[Hallie]

No, I will say you're like really nice. So like when people villainize you or anything like reality tv, it's just like, you know, fan fiction at the end of the day.

[Steve Buscemi]

Yeah. Like I like to have fun and be myself and mess around on the show, but like, I try to be a good person.

[Hallie]

Yeah, I feel that you are. Should we answer more questions?

[Lauren]

Yeah. Can I read them?

[Hallie]

Yeah, I want GR to read them. I want Jesse's takes on these worst hookup story.

[Lauren]

I'll start a couple of weeks ago. I was sucking this guy's dick and he came and he farted while he was coming.

[Hallie]

No, that happened.

[Lauren]

We'll be hearing from my lawyers. Thank you.

[Steve Buscemi]

Did that actually happen?

[Hallie]

I think you can't control that.

[Lauren]

You should be able to. Unless you're fucking geriatric.

[Steve Buscemi]

Do you ever get a teethy beach or are guys good about that?

[Lauren]

Guys are really good at sucking dick.

[Steve Buscemi]

That's cool.

[Lauren]

You should try it sometime. No teeth. I mean, unless they're like snaggle tooth.

[Steve Buscemi]

Or getting my dick sucked by a guy.

[Lauren]

Getting it sucked.

[Steve Buscemi]

Nice.

[Lauren]

Just a suggestion. I was just curious. You don't have to.

[Steve Buscemi]

Okay.

[Lauren]

Thanks.

[Steve Buscemi]

Is that an offer?

[Lauren]

I'm not pressuring you. If you want it to be. Yeah.

[Hallie]

I feel like I'm interested.

[Lauren]

Yeah. Let's just switch. Next question. This is a good one. Thoughts on pegging and your relationship? If you can, my ass. Why can't I?

[Alex]

Wait.

[Steve Buscemi]

Why?

[Lauren]

That's what. That's what I'm saying, honestly.

[Hallie]

Period.

[Lauren]

Why don't you guys swap? Switch.

[Hallie]

What do you think about butt stuff?

[Steve Buscemi]

Where does a girl get pleasure from pegging a guy? Just like the power thing.

[Hallie]

Dominance.

[Steve Buscemi]

Okay.

[Hallie]

Vegan. Alpha. No.

[Steve Buscemi]

One of my favorite memes is like Dr. Evil. He's like this. And it's like when God put the male G spot in the butthole and then made it a sin to be gay. And he's like, thank you.

[Lauren]

That's what I'm saying. Marshall. Marshall gets it.

[Steve Buscemi]

I think if guys don't think butt stuff feels good, they just are, like, scared that they're gay or haven't explored it or something like that, you know?

[Lauren]

Yeah. But most likely they're probably gay.

[Hallie]

All right, we're gonna end this because I'm honestly kind of cross eyed behind these.

[Lauren]

I'm a little buzzed.

[Hallie]

I'm hammered. The claw.

[Lauren]

We have to get ready for dinner.

[Hallie]

Oh, yeah, we have to get ready.

[Steve Buscemi]

For din you for having me fun.

[Hallie]

You have to come on again and we have to do like a real sit down because I love you so much.

[Lauren]

Oh, this isn't real.

[Hallie]

No, I love you too. Okay, I'll suck you off later. Anyways, love you all. What do we say?

[Steve Buscemi]

Up for fun or. It's not fun for you.

[Lauren]

We'll make out.

[Hallie]

Make. We never made out. You've never shoved your tongue down my throat.

[Lauren]

We've made out before, babe.

[Hallie]

Anyways, guys, thank you so much. Extra dirty. Like subscribe. You can watch on YouTube and watch an and any other platform. I'm hammered. Braden's hammered and Jesse's hot. And I love you all. Nice to meet you.

[Lauren]

Bye.

[Steve Buscemi]

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to Mario's Bistro.

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[Podcast Host]

This is Steve Buscemi. You know the actor. Well, now I'm an actor and podcast host from Piece of Work Entertainment and Campside Media in association with Olive Productions comes Big Time, an Apple Original Podcast. Each episode follows the story of one misfit with big dreams who isn't afraid to bend a few rules or take a shortcut to get there.

[Steve Buscemi]

Well, who steals bees?

[Alex]

I was duped.

[Lauren]

I shoot you in the leg.

[Podcast Host]

This is Big Time. Follow and listen on Apple Podcasts.

[Hallie]

In the mood for something crunchy, saucy and boneless? Try Jack's new Crispy Boneless Wings from Jack in the Box. Starting at just 5.99, get em with.

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[Hallie]

Enjoy so much more.