Extra Dirty with Hallie Batchelder
Episode: Yelling at men & the return of my hacker (Solo!)
Date: February 12, 2026
Host: Hallie Batchelder
Episode Overview
In this solo episode, Hallie dives into a week of cold NYC weather, Fashion Week escapades, wild nights with friends (and platonic sleepovers), the saga with her persistent hacker, and a “how many martinis?” game debating what it would take for her to do increasingly chaotic things. She keeps it candid and hilarious, pouring out her thoughts on relationships, being single in winter, the Super Bowl, and audience Q&A on everything from moving on from crushes to threesomes.
NYC Weather & Life Update (01:05–03:00)
- Mountain Hiatus: Hallie shares her recent trip to Park City, Utah, for a "top secret project." The altitude "not built for these conditions" made even elevator rides exhausting, but at least it was warmer than New York.
- NYC Freeze: Returns to blistering NYC cold—her skin, lips, and fingers suffering.
Quote: "I don't know what is going on with this Narnia Pole. Like, it feels like Antarctica up in this bitch. And I'm like, not built for it." (01:45)
Fashion Week & Mental Spiral (02:41–06:50)
- Back in the Mix: Excitement about attending various Fashion Week shows and the potential for "a lot of hot men."
- Party FOMO vs. Routine: Hallie reflects on her lack of routine due to frequent travel and a "yes mood"—driven partly by FOMO and hopes of meeting "Prince Charming."
- Single Girl February: Gets candid about feeling lonely, missing companionship, and considering freezing her eggs:
Quote: "Men have Peter Pan syndrome...I have that in the female form. I don't know what it's called. Twinkerbell syndrome?" (06:12) - Super Bowl Drama: Her whole family is at the Super Bowl (she wasn’t invited), while she’s home watching videos and cracking up at her dad dancing with "Brianna."
- Halftime Show: Gushes about Bad Bunny, and the fact that background dancers dressed as bushes had to audition: Quote: "There was a rehearsal and an audition to be a bush. You had to sign NDAs to be Bush!" (08:48)
Weekend Recap: Yelling at Men, Platonic Sleepovers & Hacker Drama (09:00–12:30)
- Friday Afters: Hosted an afterparty, yelled at a guy (with slight regret, but stands by her actions), reflects on the pointlessness of "platonic sleepovers" with straight men.
- Guy Friends Dilemma: "Who needs guy friends? Most guys want to sleep with girls, especially girls with fake knockers."
- The Return of The Hacker:
- Receives a text: “Hi Howard. I mean Hallie…”
- Hacker asks, “We need to update your nudes.”
- Hallie’s unimpressed:
Quote: “Low key, like leak them. Trust me, I don’t think I would lose followers." (12:11)
Blocks him, vents on her private story.
Segment: How Many Martinis? (12:30–38:46)
Hallie rates different outrageous scenarios by how many martinis it would take for her to do them (1–10 scale). This segment is packed with unfiltered, often absurd, takes.
Notable Scenarios & Quotes:
- Soft Launch after 1 Week?
Three martinis: "If the guy is silly, maybe after three I'd post a silly photo, but at ten martinis, I wouldn't even see my screen." (14:00) - 24-Hour IG Live, Answering All Questions?
“Six martinis—math for alcoholics.” (16:48) - Comment ‘I miss you daddy’ on Ex’s Post?
Admits she probably has already done it—three martinis. - Public Flash Mob Proposal in Times Square?
"Literally none. Sober, I'd be like, 'Get the fuck out of here.' Why did you bring me to Times Square?" (17:50) - Forgive a Guy for ChatGPT Apology?
Only two martinis: "I use ChatGPT for most things, so that means he probably cares." (18:45) - Hook Up with Friend’s Sibling?
Admits she hasn't (but has hooked up with their uncle—took nine martinis). - Go on a Date with a 5'4" Guy?
"Ten martinis. Blackout. He has to carry me in a wheelchair so we're the same height. It's just not my vibes...My worst fear is going on a date with a man who has to wear inserts. It's like a push-up bra for men." (22:46) - Let Him Use Your Toothbrush?
Sober, occasionally, but not every day. - Wedding Solo?
Prefers it—three drinks before the venue: "I'd rather go solo...then hook up with groomsmen." (25:45) - Let Mom Set You Up?
Sober. "My mom knows my type...she's always right about men." - Answer a ‘U up?’ Text at 3 AM?
Four drinks: “I don’t remember the last time I had sex sober, to be honest. Maybe cut that, maybe keep that.” (29:00) - Museum for a First Date?
Sex Museum = yes, sober (has been three times); regular museum, maybe with shrooms. - Record a TikTok in a Restaurant?
“Six—if we’re at Taco Bell, let’s make the Renegade; if it’s a nice restaurant, absolutely not.” (34:45) - Tell a Guy ‘I love you’ First?
“Not off alcohol, maybe if I’m rolling. That’s a universal experience though.” (37:15) - Reply to People's IG stories Rapid-Fire?
“Eight drinks—that’s what happened Saturday. I was calling everybody sexy.” (36:15) - Text After Being Ghosted?
“13. Or what’s the limit, 10? I try not to, but good dick might get a text at 10 martinis.” (33:12) - Start a Fight for Fun?
“One martini—that’s literally how I flirt.” (33:40) - Let Someone See Hidden Photo Folder?
"Ten, maybe for 30 seconds. I’m more worried about conversations and screenshots than nudes." (34:00) - Go on Group Date with Ex and New Partner?
"Take me out in a stretcher."
Listener Q&A (38:46–End)
Typical Extra Dirty energy, Hallie answers more unfiltered listener questions about love, sex, and chaos:
- Describe Yourself in Three Words?
“Hot. Bunny. Problem.”
Quickly expands: “Matic. Chaos. Majestic. Perfect. Bad. Insane. Psychosis. Good head.” (38:47) - Life Goals (Work, Romance, Routine)?
- Work: Plateauing is the greatest fear: “I always want to be going on the up and up. You never want to get too comfortable.”
- Romance: “Extremely busy...love my independence, but crave partnership sometimes. Not going to settle—I'd rather not be competing with 25-year-olds at 45.”
- Moving On From Crush on Best Friend?
Create space, then come back when you’re really over it. - Tips for ‘Tasting Good Down There’?
“Lemme Purr—bedroom bundle.” Playfully, “You’ll be hanging from the chandelier, tasting like popcorn. Or cotton candy." (44:40) - Getting Over a Toxic Ex's New Relationship?
They’ll be toxic to the new girl too. Distract yourself, maybe with other men or “pick up knitting.” - Not Feeling Self-Conscious During Oral?
“He’s happy to be there. If not, he’s probably either gay or 19.” - Getting Rid of a Clingy Man?
“Ghost them. Don’t give him your address.” - Threesome—Two Guys or Guy and Girl?
Prefers guy and girl ("done that many, many times"), but would try two guys—“That's a lot! I'd combust! Are they high-fiving? Are they hugging?” (46:12)
Most Memorable Quotes
- "Who needs guy friends? Can we talk about that? I have enough gay friends already." (10:18)
- “Low key, like, leak them. Leak them. Trust me, I don't think I would lose followers.” (12:11)
- "Three martinis, I think we could find a silly situation where this would work." (13:34)
- "If I was rolling face, I would do that. The opportunities never really present themselves." (46:12, on threesomes with two guys)
- "It’s like watering a plant. I don’t have any plants in my apartment. Like, I can barely keep myself alive." (41:11, on relationships)
Hallie’s Signature Style & Tone
Hallie's tone throughout is self-deprecating, brash, whimsical, and always full-disclosure. Whether discussing men, sex, routines, or her family drama, she embraces her chaotic, spontaneous energy:
- Candid on partying: “I just can't cut out partying. Like, why would I do that?”
- Self-aware about age & lifestyle: “I am 28, turning 29. I have Peter Pan syndrome, in the female form.”
- Sexual honesty & humor: “I don't remember the last time I had sex sober...maybe cut that, maybe keep that.”
- Empowerment through chaos: “You can never say I'm dull.”
Highlight Timestamps
- [01:05] — Hallie returns from Utah and rants about NYC weather
- [02:41] — Fashion Week, loneliness, party FOMO kicks in
- [06:12] — Aging, “Twinkerbell syndrome,” and freezing her eggs
- [07:41] — Super Bowl, Bad Bunny, and “auditioning to be a bush”
- [09:00] — Friday night afters, screaming at boys, platonic conundrums
- [12:00] — The return of her infamous hacker (“Hi Howard”)
- [12:30] — “How Many Martinis?” game kicks off
- [38:46] — Listener Q&A: Hallie on goals, romance, taste, sex, self-esteem, clingy men, and threesomes
For New Listeners
This episode distills the unfiltered, raucous essence of Extra Dirty: hilarious oversharing, NYC chaos, “too much information” about sex and dating, and Hallie’s sparkling, self-aware voice. Listeners get both the madness of her daily life and genuinely solid (if wild) takes on relationships and self-worth.
Listen if you love: NYC party stories, confession-fueled humor, raunchy relationship rants, and the comforting chaos of sleepover-grade girl talk.
