Episode 334: A Mulligan On Resolutions with Doree and Elise

Summary

Forever35 Podcast Episode 334: A Mulligan On Resolutions with Doree and Elise

Release Date: January 6, 2025
Hosts: Doree Shafrir & Elise Hu
Description: In this episode, hosts Doree Shafrir and Elise Hu delve into personal stories from their recent holidays, including international travel and unexpected pet emergencies. They explore the concept of New Year's resolutions, offering a fresh perspective by introducing the idea of a "mulligan"—a second chance to set intentions. Additionally, they share exciting plans for upcoming themed series and engage listeners in setting weekly intentions for the year ahead.

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1. Welcome and Catch-Up [01:31 - 05:25]

The episode begins with Doree and Elise greeting their listeners and mentioning that this is their first episode of 2025, opting for a guest-free format to allow for a more intimate conversation.

Notable Quote:

Doree [01:56]: "We have a lot to catch up on and it's the start of the year so we're going to catch you up on some intentions for the show. So let's just get cozy and have a little chat."

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2. Elise’s Epic Trip to Taiwan [02:25 - 05:25]

Elise shares her vibrant experiences from a recent trip to Taiwan, highlighting the island’s rich culinary scene. She describes enjoying a variety of dishes, from hot pot to Japanese cuisine, and marvels at Taiwan's renowned railway system and its legendary marinated pork chop bentos.

Notable Quote:

Elise [02:39]: "Taiwan is full of ethnically Chinese people, but then just all sorts of different other mixing and matching of cultures."

She also touches on meaningful family moments, including a reunion with her extended family and meaningful interactions with her grandchildren.

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3. A Scary Health Scare for Oscar [05:25 - 14:48]

Elise recounts a harrowing experience involving her puppy, Oscar, who fell ill shortly after their trip. Initially dismissing the vomiting as typical puppy antics, Elise later discovered a serious obstruction caused by an unchewed stuffed toy Oscar had ingested.

Notable Quotes:

Doree [07:13]: "You hadn't gotten around to getting him pet insurance yet."

Elise [08:32]: "On Monday, I was reluctant to spend $880 on it... But then, Oscar promptly regurgitated the treats."

The situation escalated to an emergency vet visit, culminating in a successful surgery to remove the toy. Elise reflects on the emotional toll and the financial strain, ultimately expressing relief that Oscar is recovering well.

Humorous Moment:

Elise [13:05]: "This is why I'm like, do I share this story? Because now I'm never going to get pet insurance. Like, nobody's going to approve us because he's too stupid."

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4. Holiday Celebrations and Family Highlights [14:48 - 27:30]

The hosts discuss their holiday festivities, emphasizing family-centric activities. Elise shares heartwarming stories about her son's excitement for Santa and the joy of managing multiple gift-giving traditions, including Hanukkah.

Notable Quote:

Elise [21:22]: "He was like, my little clip on book light is dead... So, it was already, like, charged, you know, and, oh, my gosh, it was a kismet."

Doree adds anecdotes about her son's favorite gifts and their family game nights, painting a picture of a lively and affectionate household.

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5. Rethinking New Year's Resolutions: The Mulligan Approach [27:30 - 34:04]

Transitioning to the New Year, Doree and Elise explore their philosophies on resolutions. They introduce the concept of a "mulligan," likening it to a second chance to set and achieve goals without the pressure associated with traditional resolutions.

Notable Quote:

Doree [29:06]: "I don't generally do New Year's resolutions, but I do look at the New Year as an opportunity for just sort of, like, reflection and renewal."

They discuss cultural perspectives, referencing the Jewish New Year in September and the Lunar New Year in February, suggesting that New Year intentions can be set multiple times throughout the year for better alignment and less stress.

Humorous Insight:

Elise [34:30]: "I often do resolutions like, 'I'm gonna spend the year 2004 spending up with an aggressive set of resolutions for 2005,' and just, like, keep punting it forward."

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6. Upcoming Themed Series and Listener Engagement [35:15 - 40:15]

The hosts reveal plans for future themed series, responding to listener feedback. The upcoming "Friendship Series" is highlighted as a major focus for February, promising insightful conversations on making and maintaining friendships.

Notable Quote:

Elise [37:00]: "We have some exciting plans for the show or some ideas for the show for later this year."

They encourage listeners to submit questions and participate in shaping future episodes, emphasizing the community-driven nature of the podcast.

---

7. Setting Weekly Intentions [41:24 - 43:37]

Doree and Elise share their personal intentions for the week, offering listeners a glimpse into their goal-setting processes.

Doree's Intention:

Doree [41:32]: "I'm gonna try to finish the newsletter draft."

Elise's Intention:

Elise [42:33]: "My intention is gonna be a consistent bedtime. I need to get my sleep hygiene back in order after the events of late."

---

8. Acknowledgements and Closing Remarks [43:37 - 45:42]

The episode concludes with Doree and Elise expressing gratitude to their Patreon supporters, listing numerous names, and providing information about their production team and contact details.

Notable Quote:

Elise [45:42]: "We'll talk to you on Wednesday."

They wrap up by reminding listeners of their availability for questions and feedback, fostering a sense of ongoing engagement and community.

---

Conclusion

In Episode 334, "A Mulligan On Resolutions," Doree Shafrier and Elise Hu offer an intimate look into their personal lives, blending humor with heartfelt stories. From international adventures and family joys to unexpected pet emergencies, they navigate the complexities of the holiday season and the dawn of a new year. By introducing the concept of mulligans for setting intentions, they provide a refreshing take on personal growth and goal-setting. The episode not only entertains but also invites listeners to reflect and engage, setting the stage for a year of meaningful conversations and community connections on Forever35.

Transcript

[Advertiser]

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[Elise Hu]

Foreign.

[Dory Shafrier]

Hello, welcome to Forever 35, a podcast about the things we do to take care of ourselves. I'm Dory Shafrier.

[Elise Hu]

And I'm Elise Hu. And we are two friends who like to talk a lot about serums. Welcome back.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, welcome back. Welcome to our first show, our first new show of 2025. We are going guest free.

[Elise Hu]

This is just going to be us solo episode. Yeah, well, not solo because there's two of us.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah. Duo app.

[Elise Hu]

Yes.

[Dory Shafrier]

We have a lot to catch up on and it's the start of the year so we're going to catch you up on some intentions for the show. So let's just get cozy and have a little chat.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah, and we always catch up at the top of the show anyway. And the two of us haven't seen each other in a bit because I was traveling and it's been a minute, so I guess Dory hit me with the headlines.

[Dory Shafrier]

Well, I want to hear about your trip. I feel like you have like more exciting headlines than I do because I didn't go anywhere. So let's hear about Taiwan because I was following along on social media, but yeah.

[Elise Hu]

Oh man, it was an epic trip. So the way of Taiwan is to eat all the time because it is a food lover's paradise. The Taiwanese, I feel like it's an island of 25 million foodies. The. There's obviously really great Chinese food because Taiwan is full of ethnically Chinese people, but then just all sorts of different other mixing and matching of cultures. So we had hot pot, I want to say, like, four times in three days. And finally, Rob, who came along, he was like, I'm done with hot pot. We're not doing shabu shabu or hot pot anymore. But Ava could have kept going with that, but enjoyed a lot of really great Japanese food. Chirashi bowls, donburi bowls, conveyor belt sushi. The train system. The railway system in Taiwan takes its pork chops so seriously. And they're bento boxes. So, like the railway bentos, which only cost, like, between two and $3 US they are. They have. They're legendary. And they've, like, spawned competition between different railway stations in terms of, like, who makes the best marinated pork chop. And so. And, you know, these bentos come with a protein main and two or three vegetable sides and a marinated egg and tofu braised tofu on a bed of fluffy rice. And it's just so fun like, that even, you know, a train ride includes a great meal. So that was awesome. Besides that, my parents had all five grandkids together, which was very meaningful to them. And the cousins got to hang out, which is rare because my brother and his family live in Hong Kong. And so it's, like, hard for us to get together just on random weekends. You know, they moved from Texas to Hong Kong during COVID so just seeing the kids grow up and. Or my niece and nephew have. They've grown up a lot just since last year, since the last time I saw them. And they got to hang out a lot with my three girls, and it was just like, a really great time. And, like, we didn't have major travel snafus or anything like that. It was just a lot of, like, family time in various adventures. We did museums. We did, like, the historical places. We did outdoor stuff. We stayed at this hotel for a few days where they give each room. It's so family friendly that they give each room, like, one of those Fancy Electric Kid McLarens and Kid Mercedes and various things, and then all the hallways. The hotels were, like, racetracks, and so it's not a hotel. Rob was like, do you think anybody has ever had sex in this hotel? Because, like, you're in the room and all you hear are, like, kids racing past in their little like Kid McLarens, like from morning till 10pm, which is quite the beginning of quiet time. It's crazy.

[Dory Shafrier]

Wow.

[Elise Hu]

But also a dreamland for children, right?

[Dory Shafrier]

That is hilarious.

[Elise Hu]

I think there's a few photos on my Instagram if you want to see that experience. But yeah, so the trip itself was all great. And then we did Christmas there. But like two days before we came home, Maddie, my ex husband who was staying at my house to watch Oscar, our puppy, our like five month old puppy, he, he texts me and he's like, hey, can you do a call? And I'm like, okay. So I get on the phone and he's like, Oscar's throwing up. He's like throwing up a lot. And I wasn't going to be home until I think late Sunday night. And I was like, that's okay. He eats random things, right? Like he gets into the patio furniture and like swallows foam and he's a puppy later. See it in his poop, right? He's a golden puppy, right? So I was like, okay, should be fine, let's not worry about it. But go ahead and just get a vet appointment for Monday so that he can get checked out. And so he did that. And then the next day he checks in and he's like, all right, Oscar ate breakfast. So I think we're out of the woods. Like he was eating. He wasn't like all lethargic and feeling dumpy like he was on Saturday. So I think we're out of the woods, all good. And I was like, okay, great, great. So Sunday night we all come home. I obviously didn't feed Oscar because we didn't come home until like nearly midnight. And the next morning I'm like, great, Oscar's back. I'm going to like feed him breakfast. I feed him breakfast, he promptly regurgitates everything. Like it was like still formed food, you know.

[Dory Shafrier]

And I was just.

[Elise Hu]

Didn't feel great. But we already had that vet appointment, right? So we bring him to the vet on Monday afternoon and the vet can't feel any sort of obstruction. But she's like, okay, well let's just put him on a bland diet to see. Because they asked me if I wanted an X ray and told me it was $880. And I was like, I mean, let.

[Dory Shafrier]

Me guess, you hadn't gotten around to getting him pet insurance yet.

[Elise Hu]

No. I mean, also, I've never insured any of my pets because I haven't had any issue, you know, like I haven't had issues to where I would have Thought, oh, gosh, it would have been nice to have pet insurance. I also have heard, and you should tell me about this, like, that pet insurance is very expensive and covers very little. Is that true?

[Dory Shafrier]

We have pet insurance? Probably at the end of the day, like, I will not come out ahead, but I have had a couple of claims that they have paid out.

[Elise Hu]

They don't pay.

[Dory Shafrier]

They don't pay out for, like, routine vet visits. So you can't get any reimbursement for that. But they will pay out for any, like, weird thing that happened. So, like, he. Bo also had a thing where he was throwing up, and they had to do X rays, and they had to do the whole thing. And I got reimbursed, like, a bunch of money. Like, probably close to, like, $900. And, you know, he. Bo's getting older, and I just am like. Like, his last vet appointment, his vet was like, I think I hear a heart murmur. So, you know, I feel like there's, like, stuff that's coming up, and I'm like, okay, if I can get, like, some money back for this, then great.

[Elise Hu]

So I don't hear this story.

[Dory Shafrier]

No, I know.

[Elise Hu]

After you. After I get through this story, I.

[Dory Shafrier]

May not qualify, right?

[Elise Hu]

I don't think I'm going to qualify for pet insurance.

[Dory Shafrier]

Well, you might. I mean, you might. They just. They don't cover preexisting conditions. But this isn't, like, a condition. This is just, like an accident. You know what I mean? So it's like, I don't know, maybe.

[Elise Hu]

I can still get it. We're definitely going to invest in it. Because at first, on Monday, I was reluctant to spend $880 on it.

[Dory Shafrier]

X ray, right.

[Elise Hu]

Hold my beer, though, because.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yes. Oh, my God.

[Elise Hu]

Because after that, she said, all right, fine, skip the X ray. We'll put him on a bland diet. But if he goes home and pukes one more time, you need to go to the emergency room. So I give him some treats. As we leave the vet, he seems happy. He's wagging his tail a lot, in good spirits. We go home. He promptly regurgitates the treats. And so I'm like, great, we're going to the ER on New Year's Eve Eve. So it's. Yeah, December 30th. We go to the ER and the ER doctor, like, the critical care doctor who's in charge, she immediately feels down by his bladder, and she's like, he either really needs to go pee or there's something in here. Because there's something very Hard. And she presses on it, and he pukes. So she's like, okay, obviously there's something stuck there, which means now we have to go to ultrasound. Which was, like, double what I would have. What I was trying to avoid with the X ray. Right?

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, of course.

[Elise Hu]

They go to ultrasound, they see that there's definitely something in there, and they're like, we can do medical management to see if it passes. Like, if he. It just. His system takes care of it, and he poops it out in the morning or at least moves down if you want to avoid surgery, because surgery is $10,000. And so I was like, yes, I want to avoid surgery. And I'm, like, pushing my. As I'm hearing about this, I'm, like, just pushing my giant cart through Costco, like, loading up on all my party supplies, because I was hosting New Year's Ev. And. And so I was just like, ugh. What's the value of trying to, like, save some money at Costco at this point?

[Dory Shafrier]

Seriously?

[Elise Hu]

It felt absurd.

[Dory Shafrier]

Oh, my God.

[Elise Hu]

But, you know, Rob and I were both on the phone with her, and we're like, okay, let's try to have his system pass it. So we allowed, or we agreed to have him hospitalized on that, not that evening, to see if his system would kind of move things along. And they were pumping him with IVs, IV fluid to try and, like, get things going. And the next morning, they called, and they're like, it's lodged. I mean, it moved incrementally, but it ain't gonna pass through the system. We had no idea what this was. I thought it was like, a rock or concrete or something. I was like, okay, why isn't it passing through? As a little baby intestine? He's only five months old, maybe. And they told me, like, intestine, puppy intestines were a little bit more, like, pliant at this stage, but not stretchy enough. So then they have to open them up on New Year's Eve and, like, major abdominal surgery. I was so worried. None of my babies, my human creatures, none of them have ever been hospitalized. None of them have ever, like, been in an operation. They haven't been. You know, they don't have any incisions in their bodies. And so I really didn't know. I was really flying blind. I didn't know how I was going to feel about it. I didn't. I just have. Don't have any experience with this. And it was really hard because that morning, like, there's nothing you can do we went to the hospital to see him, you know, in his little kennel and tell him what was going on, because he was probably like, where's my family?

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

And he was wagging his tail. He's just like, you know, such a happy go. Lucky little guy. And I, like, leveled with him and told him what was up and that he'd be fine. And the surgery took, like, you know, apparently the anesthesia all worked well, and the surgery took about an hour. And they got it out, and they sent me a photo, and they go, it wasn't what. And he came through with flying colors. And they were like, it wasn't what you thought it was. And they emailed it to me, and it was like, it. It wasn't unchewed. There wasn't even any sort of, like, you know, cut or rip or tear in this item. It was an unchewed stuffy toy of, like, a cheetah.

[Dory Shafrier]

Oh, my gosh. Wait, we haven't talked about this, because the last time I talked to you, you thought it was a rock.

[Elise Hu]

I thought it was a rock.

[Dory Shafrier]

It was stuffy toy.

[Elise Hu]

It was a stuffy toy that was, like, bigger than a golf ball. That was completely unchewed. I don't even know how he swallowed it.

[Dory Shafrier]

Oh, no, Oscar. What a dum dum.

[Elise Hu]

This is why I'm like, do I share this story? Because now I'm never going to get pet insurance. Like, nobody's going to approve us because he's too stupid.

[Dory Shafrier]

No, he's a puppy. No, but it's not like he has a. He doesn't have, like, a medical condition, I think. You know what I mean? Like, this is just like, a weird, freak accident anyway.

[Elise Hu]

It is hilarious. And then one of the vets. Hilarious and tragic. I mean, because obviously, you know, recovery is going to take a while. He's on a million meds. The bill is astronomical because his recovery hasn't been completely linear. So he's been hospitalized extra nights, and a hospitalization each night is thousands of dollars. And it's just like, what? But I'm so glad he. He's okay and that he's in good spirits. And, you know, we're just going to have to manage it and really keep an eye. But one of the vets joked, she was like, it's possible the cat did this to him. And I was like, what? And she goes, well, cats are very bright, and, you know, they don't get along. Right. I'm like, yeah, they still haven't quite gotten along, and they're like, it looks like a cat toy because I don't know if it's a kid toy or a cat toy, you know, because who knows? I have so many kids and I have a cat. It's like the size of a cat toy.

[Dory Shafrier]

You think the cat, like, sabotage. Sabotaged him? Oh, my God. Okay, I'm sorry, but that is kind of funny. It's like, not, but it is, you know. Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

Anyway, we have so much more to catch up on, but it is time to take a break. So.

[Dory Shafrier]

Wow. Wow.

[Elise Hu]

Okay, let's take a quick break and we will be right back with you.

[Dory Shafrier]

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[Elise Hu]

Brought to you by BetterHelp. December is all about getting cozy. I already feel cozy, whether it means warm beverages, soft blankets, or time with your loved ones. And I think you should consider adding therapy to your list too, if you're not already seeing a therapist. Knowing I can talk to somebody about anything has always been a comfort to me when I'm in therapy. Learning coping skills, boundary setting, or even just a little bit more about myself brings me comfort. It's also helped me grow over the years to better know myself. It's strengthened my relationships. It is comfort that never goes away even when the season changes. So if you're thinking of starting therapy, you can give better help a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient and flexible. Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Find comfort this December with better help. Visit betterhelp.com forever35 today to get 10% off your first month. That's better. H E L p.com forever35.

[Advertiser]

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[Dory Shafrier]

All right, we are back. I mean I don't even know where to start. I guess we should let's just remind everyone about all the things. Yes, we have a website forever35podcast.com over there we have links to everything we mentioned on the show. We're also on Instagram at february35podcast our patreon is at patreon.com forever35 we do weekly casual chats that are like very similar to the conversations that we're having today actually. So if you want more of that, sign up for our [e-mail] forever35 we have our favorite products on our shop my at Shopmy us forever35 we have a newsletter at forever35podcast.com newsletter and please call or text us at 781-591-0390 email us at forever35podcastmail.com we love to answer your questions in our mini episodes so Please send those over. And yeah, that's all. That's all the biz, as they say in the biz.

[Elise Hu]

Some people call it biz, some people call it biz, short for business. Do you remember, do you remember when blogs first came out and the newspapers would be like weblog or blog short for weblogs. And that was going on for so long and it was like this inside joke between me and my friends. We'd be like, oh, yeah, just, you know, I'll be blogging about it. Blog, short for weblog. And now, and now it's like X, previously known as Twitter. It just makes me sad. Anyway, well, door, your turn. Now that. Now that we've gotten through the drama of my. Of my pet's major abdominal surgery, tell me what you enjoyed over holiday break. Any moments, memorable moments or.

[Dory Shafrier]

Wow. I mean, I like, I feel like my break was so uneventful compared to yours. I mean, knock on wood, it's. I guess it's.

[Elise Hu]

It's not. Yeah, it's not over series of events you want.

[Dory Shafrier]

Right, right. Exactly. Yeah. Nothing dramatic with my dog or my child. Yeah. So, you know, in our house we do Christmas and Hanukkah, Chrismica, Chris, Mika and Henry. You know, he's at that like perfect age where he believes in Santa and is like very into Santa. And it's like, you know, I grew up Jewish, so I never did Santa. And I always sort of like rolled my eyes at Santa. I was like, oh, Santa, whatever. But now that my son is into it, I'm like, okay, this is actually pretty cute. So he got some gifts from Santa and those were in one wrapping paper. And then the gifts that he got from us were in a different wrapping paper because Santa's elves use their own wrapping paper.

[Elise Hu]

Exactly.

[Dory Shafrier]

His favorite. He said his favorite gift was this, like. I don't even know how to describe it. It's like a light up, almost like a flashlight, but has like a spinny thing on top that's rainbow colored.

[Elise Hu]

Oh, yes, yes.

[Dory Shafrier]

I've seen those that you get at like concerts. Shows. Yeah, or concerts. Yeah, exactly. So we had taken him to one of those like holiday light shows and they sell them for like insane markups there. And we were like, no, you cannot get one. Like, no. And he was like, well, can. Can you tell Santa to bring me one? And so that was his favorite gift. It was 9.99 from Amazon. And his second favorite gift was Spidey. Spidey and his amazing friends themed Monopoly junior. Now, if you do not have A child under the age of, like, six. You might not be familiar with Spidey and his Amazing Friends, but it is a very popular Disney show with Spidey, it's like, it's basically like, Spidey Junior.

[Elise Hu]

Okay.

[Dory Shafrier]

And so it's like Spidey has a crew with Ghost Spider, Ant Man, Miles Morales, like, is there too, Ms. Marvel? Like, it's so. It's. And it's very cute. And they go on adventures and he, like, loves it. So that was his second favorite gift. The Spidey and his Amazing Friends, Monopoly Junior, which he has made us play a thousand times. And then, you know, for Hanukkah, he also got gifts every night, right? Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

But then Hanukkah this year didn't start until Christmas.

[Dory Shafrier]

Did not start until Christmas.

[Elise Hu]

So it's really a bounty.

[Dory Shafrier]

It was a bounty. You know, I really tried. We really tried to keep it, like, pretty low key. Like, he didn't get anything huge or extravagant just because the volume of gifts was so, so intense. But he was, like, really into everything. Like, it was really cute. For the last night of Hanukkah, we got him a Lego set of Elsa's castle from Frozen.

[Elise Hu]

Yes.

[Dory Shafrier]

And it's the first Lego set that he's been really into. And he and Matt are working on it together. And it is really cute. And also he can play games now. So on New Year's Eve, he wanted to stay up and watch the ball drop. The New York ball drop. And, you know, he goes to bed at, like, 7, so staying up till 9 is, like, big for him. So we decided to do family game night. Also. Matt was really sick, so, like, that also was just kind of a bummer. But yeah, we did family game night until the ball drop. And Henry was, like, really into it and, like, picked the games we played. We also got him a variety of Uno called no Mercy.

[Elise Hu]

Oh, I don't know about no Mercy Uno. We play a lot of hardcore Uno in our house and with the cousins and everybody.

[Dory Shafrier]

So maybe no Mercy Uno is, like, insane. It has, like, plus 10 cards. It has, like, all sorts of, like, crazy action cards. And there's, like, some, like, wild rules.

[Elise Hu]

That it's just like, we're adding this to our shop.

[Dory Shafrier]

Mind you, you honestly should. Because, like, you should get it. No, because it's such a. It's like a ridiculous game. Like, there's a lot of, like, swapping hands that happens. Like, it's just, like. It's just crazy. So we did that. He also wanted to play. We also Played blackjack. He loves blackjack.

[Elise Hu]

Amazing. Good. It's good for his addition skills. Like, quick.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah. And then we watched the ball drop and he went to bed. So it was like. And then I went to bed, like, not long after that. So it was a. It was a low key New Year's Eve. I was sorry to miss your party. We just like, the babysitter situation on New Year's Eve is like, on New.

[Elise Hu]

Year's Eve was rough. No. And I understand there were a lot of half of couples that came. So. Listeners, y'all know about my annual holiday party, Deck the Balls. Usually I do it before, you know, Christmas and Hanukkah. However, this year, because of the long travel, I just couldn't get it in. There were only. And because of the late Thanksgiving, I just couldn't find a weekend evening to even do it.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yes.

[Elise Hu]

And so. And plus, it requires getting the band together. Rob's band has like at least five or six members who all have to be available on the same night. And so we just couldn't do it. But then I realized there's balls involved with New Year's Eve also. So Deck the Balls could happen. It didn't even have to happen as a Christmas party. You know, it could be a New Year's Eve party. So for the first time, we did a modified Deck the Balls on New Year's Eve because, you know, the ball falls on New Year's Eve. And it worked out. It was just a little hectic since, you know, the dog was in surgery. What a day.

[Dory Shafrier]

What?

[Elise Hu]

What a day.

[Dory Shafrier]

Like, I feel like only, only you could pull this off. Like coming back from a two week international trip with your three children to a dog who needed emergency surgery. And then you throw a very, like, fun and successful party. I would have curled up into a ball. And the ball party is off.

[Elise Hu]

I'm just now catching up on sleep. I don't think I've slept, like, much cumulative, cumulatively because of the, you know, late return. But yeah, it did turn out well. I was gonna tell you something related to it. Oh, yes. I have a little Hanukkah story. So each night. So I got small gifts for Rob each night of Hanukkah. Like very small things, like, like a little Muji sponge, you know, just so that there was something each night. And on the night of the party, he was like, my little clip on book light is dead. And they needed one for the music stand. Oh. Because, you know, they were playing outside in the backyard without a lot of lighting over them. There's lighting kind of on them from the ground.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Elise Hu]

To read your music. And the band was, like, throwing things together. It's not like they rehearse a bunch for a backyard party. So they needed, like, he needed a little clip, and he needed lighting or to rig his phones to actually be able to read the lyrics or read the chords in front of him. And the light was out, and I was like, I don't have any. Like, my. My kids read on Kindles or, you know, Kindle on iPad. Like, I. Yeah, I don't have any, but I was like, I guess you can just. But I remembered I bought him a bunch of stuff, right, For. For Hanukkah. And they were like small boxes. So they were like all small boxes that were near the tree. And, like, I don't know. Pick one of those. Because I couldn't remember. I was like, I might have gotten one, but I don't know, and I don't know which one it is. Right. And so he went for it, and he opens up. I kid you not. A reading light. A clip on reading light, which was one of his Hanukkah gifts. Just in time. And it was already, like, charged, you know, and, oh, my gosh, it was a kismet. So, seriously, it really worked out. Yeah, it was nice. And it made me feel like, oh, good, we're ending the year on this nice, like, kind of faded, faded note. So, yeah, yeah, yeah, that was a nice little moment. That's really nice. Yeah. So one thing we wanted to talk about since now it is the start of the year, is, you know, we do weekly intentions, which we will continue, obviously, and we can talk about that at the tail end of today's show. But are you. Where are you on New Year's resolutions? Like, do you have a philosophy about it? Do you do it regularly?

[Dory Shafrier]

Because I have some thoughts I don't really have. I don't. I generally don't do New Year's resolutions, but I do look at the New year as, like, an opportunity for just sort of, like, reflection and renewal.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah.

[Dory Shafrier]

I guess I'll put it that way. And, you know, I think 2024 was a. Was a tough year, and I'm just, like. I'm just reflecting on it. Like, how can I go into 2025 with a different mindset? Like, what can I. What can I do that is, like, within my power to.

[Elise Hu]

Right.

[Dory Shafrier]

Change? I haven't quite figured that out yet. I'm like, I'm. I'm working on it. I. You Know, I finished my one line a day journal, my five year. One line a day journal. Yeah. APPLAUSE and instead of getting another one line a day journal, I got just a journal with like one page to write every day. And so I have been doing that and that's been like a nice exercise. Like, when I started the one line a day journal, I hadn't been journaling in, you know, since I was a teenager. And so I think I was like, let's, let's set the bar low and just write like an inch worth of text every day.

[Elise Hu]

Right.

[Dory Shafrier]

And like, honestly, by like year two, I was like, I could probably be writing more, you know, and so it's been nice to just like have a little bit more space, like giving myself a little bit more space to reflect on the day. So I'm starting there. And yeah, you know, I've been saying that like one of the bright spots in my life this past year was tennis. And so like, reflecting on what that means for the coming year. I have been working on designing my own, like, tennis journal and setting like some goals, some tennis related goals in there. Like, again, keeping things really like focused and.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah.

[Dory Shafrier]

Small, I think, is not small, but like, not being like, I'm going to change my life this year. Like.

[Elise Hu]

Right, right.

[Dory Shafrier]

It's more like I'm going to work on my serve.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. Something measurable. Right?

[Dory Shafrier]

Measurable and achievable.

[Elise Hu]

Right.

[Dory Shafrier]

I think is also, I like, I, I guess, I guess what I'm saying is like, I feel like I need some wins, you know, and so just like thinking about what that looks like. But I, I agree with you in the sense. I think I agree with you in the sense of like, I hesitate to call them like resolutions per se.

[Elise Hu]

I think one of my issues with New Year's resolutions is the timing. Because it comes like right after this crazy period of December and the holidays and all of like the family time or the travel or whatever. And suddenly we have to be like, okay, now I have to reflect and I have to renew and I have to resolve, like during the dead week of the year, that time like when you're not quite back at work yet.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yes.

[Elise Hu]

It'd be great if the year started at a different time.

[Dory Shafrier]

Well, I have always argued that, like, the, the timing of the Jewish New Year to me makes more sense. September as a time for the new year to begin.

[Elise Hu]

Yes.

[Dory Shafrier]

You know, it's like the start of school. It's changing from summer to fall. Like, it just. To me, September just feels like a more logical time. To ring in a new year, because I agree with you. Like, you're kind of coming off of the chaos and the intensity of the holidays.

[Elise Hu]

Right. And suddenly now I have to kind of clean it all up and, like, get it together for the next year. And it's like, whoa, I haven't even recovered yet.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, totally, totally. So I have often, like. Like, just sort of thought of September, like, the Jewish New Year, as the new year. So for whatever that's worth. Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

And then with my people, we have Lunar New Year, which is in February. So I often, like, if I don't have a good start in January, I'm like, that's cool. No big deal. We'll do the Lunar New Year. We're gonna start the year in February because I'm still catching up in January.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, yeah.

[Elise Hu]

So we get a redo. I get a mulligan in. I love that any of us can do a redo, you know, on Lunar New Year. We'll just mark that one. It's older anyway, than the Gregorian calendar.

[Dory Shafrier]

Mulligan was a crossword clue the other day, and I was like, mulligan? Mulligan. What is a mulligan? And then it, like, clicked for me.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah.

[Dory Shafrier]

But it. It was just funny to hear you use that word, because I feel like it's not a word that's, like, in my instinctive vocabulary.

[Elise Hu]

Got it.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

Anyway, I think. I think I just use it because I used to play golf.

[Advertiser]

Oh, yeah?

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. I was a golfer in high school, and so maybe. Yeah, maybe some golf terms kind of get in there sometimes.

[Dory Shafrier]

That's so funny.

[Elise Hu]

I get jokey about it. I often. Back when I was, like, in my 20s, I would do resolutions where I would say, like, I'm gonna. I resolved to spend the year 2004 spending up with an aggressive set of resolutions for 2005, you know, and just, like, keep. Keep punting it forward.

[Dory Shafrier]

Oh, that's funny.

[Elise Hu]

But we do have. We do want to talk with you listeners, because we do have some, like, plans and exciting things for the show or some ideas for the show for later this year. And I guess we can talk about that after the break or.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, let's do that.

[Elise Hu]

Okay, great. All right, we'll be right back.

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[Dory Shafrier]

All right, we are back and yeah, we wanted to talk a little bit about what we have coming up for the show.

[Elise Hu]

Yes. Well, as you all know, and we got great feedback on our first themed month in November of 2024, which was midlife and Menopause. Thank you all so much for your questions, for your enthusiasm, for voting for that in our Patreon survey as the top interest for a themed month. So we got that kicked off and going. The next most popular topic among our Patreon supporters was friendship. So Friendship Month or the Friendship Series. I don't know if we'll have enough guests for a full month, but the Friendship series is coming up in February and I'm already super excited about it because, I mean, we can't say too much, I guess, until we unveil the full list of guests. But we've already had at least one conversation.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yes.

[Elise Hu]

And it was really insightful. Like, I, I learned a lot.

[Dory Shafrier]

Definitely, definitely. I'm really excited for this upcoming month.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. And she, it was funny because one of the questions that this guest got a lot was like, how do you break up with friends? And she was like, I'm not about ending friendships.

[Dory Shafrier]

I thought that was so funny. She's like, my book is about how to make and keep friends, how to be a good friend.

[Elise Hu]

Right. The other thing that we wanted to mention was that, like something that worked really well with Midlife and Menopause Month was that when you sent in questions for about the topic, we were able to take them to the expert. And so something we want to bring back for Friendship Month is if you have questions about friendship or advice you're looking for about friendship and either making friends, nurturing friendships, like intention in your friendships. Send those in, call in, text in, write in, and instead of hearing from us, maybe one of our guests will be able to address your questions and give you advice.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah.

[Elise Hu]

What other theme months do you think that we can squeeze in for? 2025 door?

[Dory Shafrier]

You know, a lot of people were interested in dermatologists weighing in. I don't know if that is like, a full month of content, but certainly, like, one or two episodes. I think we could have a dermatologist come on the show. We've had dermatologists on before, and they were always popular episodes, and people, you know, sent in their questions for them. So, yeah, I feel like that's just sort of like an evergreen thing that we can do. For sure.

[Elise Hu]

Yeah. It's interesting because when we have our resident makeup artist, Rachel Goodwin, on, there's always a ton of questions for her, and obviously she comes quarterly. So continue to send in your Rachel questions and just note in your note that it's for Rachel. But sometimes the questions sort of veer into medical territory for Rachel, and she's like, I'm not a dermatologist. I shouldn't be answering this question. So it is a good idea, probably, for us to have a derm maybe once or twice a year.

[Dory Shafrier]

That'd be cool, for sure.

[Elise Hu]

Cool.

[Dory Shafrier]

What about you? Is there. Is there anything on this list that you feel like we should.

[Elise Hu]

I had a lot of fun with you doing our Sable Young live episode at the bookstore last summer. So one thing I really want to do between the two of us and a guest this year, maybe a guest who's promoting a book, because we can do it at a bookstore, is another live event because it meant that we got to meet some of our listeners in real life. And there's just kind of like a different texture to the interview when you're doing it in person, and there's a liveliness to it. And plus, there's audience questions. And a lot of times the audience questions are, like, far more brilliant than ours. And so I just. I would love to be intentional about trying to get in another live event in the summer. That'd be cool.

[Dory Shafrier]

Yeah, let's do that. That would be super fun.

[Elise Hu]

And listeners, if you have ideas, too, we'll. We'll try and survey you again. I thought the Patreon survey that you conducted at the Host Swap last year in the spring was really instructive and insightful, so maybe we can do another Survey or do an Ann survey, because that. There's just so much to learn from you all. But obviously our inboxes are always open, so if you. You can send us any tips or suggestions or questions anytime.

[Dory Shafrier]

Great. Let's do it.

[Elise Hu]

All right.

[Dory Shafrier]

Do you want to talk about our intentions just for the week?

[Elise Hu]

Yes. We need to check in. So your intention. The last time we did our weekly intentions, what were you. What were you aiming for?

[Dory Shafrier]

So I was aiming for. I just have. What I have written down here is tennis newsletter slash vision board. I think I was like, I'm gonna figure out what I'm doing with my tennis newsletter idea that I've been tossing around for a while. And then I also said I was gonna do a vision board. I didn't do a vision board. Doing vision boards is harder now that we don't, like, subscribe to magazine.

[Elise Hu]

Oh, you're right. You're right.

[Dory Shafrier]

Like, I don't have anything to vision board. I did, however, start a draft of a tennis newsletter. So I am going to try to finish the newsletter draft. I have a bunch of, like, other work I need to get done this week, but I will. I'm going to put that on the list of things. So putting that out there, manifesting it, stating it, very cool. What about you?

[Elise Hu]

I. My intention had to do with family time and, like, really spending quality and concentrated time with family. Which. Boy did I. Boy did I. But it was warm. It wasn't. We didn't have any drama. There wasn't anything where it was like, oh, I'm not gonna talk to my so and so in law, you know, after this. So we had really great family time. And so I feel like I lived out that intention very well. And I'm glad I. We put that out into the universe. And the Rob really blended in very well with all the extended families, so that was lovely. It was his first trip to Taipei. Um, my intention for the week going forward is going to be. I mean, I think I'm gonna be really harried and tied up with trying to take care of the puppy and all his medications. He has a crazy schedule. And so I think my intention is gonna be a consistent bedtime. You know, I need to get my sleep hygiene back in order after the events of late. And just being able to sleep and get quality sleep is gonna be so crucial during stressful periods. So sleep hygiene will be it. That'll be my first weekly intention for the year.

[Dory Shafrier]

Love it. Love it. All right, well, it's been great seeing you again.

[Elise Hu]

Yes, I'm so glad we got to catch up. And thanks, listeners.

[Dory Shafrier]

Me too. And before we wrap up, it is time for us to thank our Patreon supporters. Elise, since your voice is shot, I will do the honors.

[Elise Hu]

Okay.

[Dory Shafrier]

Thank you. To the following supporters. Katie Ashley Taylor, Theresa Anderson, Michelle Maya, Barbara Chiakalos, Amy Sarah Fitz, Amy Schnitzer, Heather Hale, Megan Donald Brew Jr. Helen De Moy, Shelly Lee, Kim Begler, Sarah Sarah Boozy, Allison Cohen, Susan Burseth, Melissa McLean, Lenny Jones, Fran Kelsey Wolf Donne Laura Eddy, Jettel Apte, Valerie Bruno, Julie Daniel, Katie Cotron, E. Jackson, Alicia Merritt, Amy Maseko, Liz Rain, JDK, Jennifer Smith, Hannah M, Julia Putt, Maddie O'Day, Marissa Lauren Gitlin, Sarah Bell, Maria Diana, Coco Bean, Laura Haddon, Josie H. Nikki Bossert, Juliana Duff, Chelsea Torres, Angie James, Tiffany G, Diane m. Martin, Emily McIntyre, Stephanie Germana, Elizabeth Anderson, Kelly Dearborn, Christine Bassis, Allison Marklaine, Zulima Lundy, Carolyn Rodriguez, Carrie Gold, Auntie Nikki, Katherine Ellingson, Kara Brugman, Sarah H, Sarah Egan, Jess Combin, Jennifer Olson, Jennifer hs, Eliza Gibson, Jillian Bowman, Brianne Macy, Karen Perelman, Katie Jordan, Sarah M, Lisa Travis, Kate M, Emily Bruyer, Josie Alquist, Tara Todd, Elizabeth Cleary and Monica. And just a reminder that Forever 35 is hosted and produced by me, Dory Shafrier and Elise Hu and produced and edited by Sam Hunio. Sammy Reed is our project manager and our network partner is acast. Thanks, everyone.

[Elise Hu]

We'll talk to you on Wednesday.

[Advertiser]

Bye.